After watching a video that someone posted on here yesterday (pretty sure it was RSDTyler giving a speech recalling his past) it help me realize how much of a social noob I am. It put what I have been thinking into context.

I use to think that my emotional intelligence was quite high, but I have rescinded those thoughts. To sum it up in one sentence: I do not understand women sexually. I cannot understand for the life of me of when they are attracted to me, or for that matter if the even are.

Here are a few examples of my inept social abilities:

  1. I think people think how I think - which is absolutely retarded. I put myself in their shoes, if you will, but instead of being open minded I try to understand them solely from my perspective and how I would react to the stimulus.

  2. I don't understand what makes a male attractive, other then the really apparent examples. So for the matter, I have no idea of how attractive I am. I generally have rated myself ranging from a 4-7. I understand the extremes but have a lot harder time figuring out everything else.

  3. I don't know how and what context is discussing sexual matters appropriate. So, since I don't understand, other than the complete extremes (i.e. sexual assault etc), I completely just steer away from it. This probably stems from me repressing my sexuality from when I was younger, because I thought it was abnormal in some shape or another.

Hopefully this is somewhat clear, because to be honest, my ideas haven't fully resonated yet; they are just starting to form.