Hey guys,

Im end 27 and pretty new in the game. Thanks to my parents I have very good masculine looks, often people tell me that I look like a pornstar in the 80s. Due to my porn addiction I had nearly no experience with women. Im now 4 months free of porn and want to feel the magic between men and women.

However, I did read Mark Mansons "Models" and it appealed to me the most because I can unite it with the wisdoms of Buddha - Honesty. I have 4 years meditation and mindfulness experience, Im not free from anxiety but Im okay with the feeling of anxiety and insecurity when it arises. And as I see every (difficult) feeling just as a banal experience which will pass, Im a very confident guy.

So I will take this as the base to trial and error trough the seduction beginner phase. My inner game is solid, I dont need validation from the outside to be happy and so Im honest about my feelings. If I interact with a girl I like, than I show that I like her. If she doesn't like me back how I am its okay for me and I go on.

So now to my question about vulneribility. There were two cases in the last week.

I started a Salsa/Bachata course last week and there was a very sweet and likable girl. In our first encouter I felt how she was into me, we chatted, laughed and danced. After a while we were safe in our steps and able to hold intensive eye contact without looking down on our feets. As the eye contact intensified, the sexual tension intensified too and I wasnt able to concentrate on the steps. Then I had to say "damn everytime I look in your eyes so deep, I fail my steps". I dont know if this is the right english word, but her happily smiling embarrassed face was definitive a very positive reaction. We had fun till the end.

A few days after the salsa course I were at a outdoor party and a very attractive erasmus girl approached me. I approached her a week ago at a club and reached later at the dancefloor my hand out to dance with her but she refused. The last time I saw her, was at the university. We had very long eyecontact from the distance and as I nodded to her, she nodded back. We talked at the outdoor party a bit, I touched her but Im not so good in english so Im not able to hold a profound conversation. I felt that she was into me (she waited as I went away for a few minutes to pour me a drink), but something was very odd. She claimed that she never saw me and we never talked besides today. She didnt look so drunk the another like that she wasnt able to remember me.

However, I lost her because U got chatted up from a guy and we talked a while. After a few hours I saw her again (got a number of an asian in this time between) and showed her some Bachata steps I learned a few days ago. So this included spins and very heavy kino with a hugging move. I looked into her eyes but she wasnt able to maintain it and got very nervous (she was the shy type of girl), but she enjoyed the dancing. And so I became nervous and failed steps. And then I had to tell her "Its hard to concentrate because Im a little bit excited now". Bam! she walked away and looked somehow disappointed. I felt a pain of my ego to did something wrong but I was okay with it and went away to piss. The bothering thoughts about it still arising but it will pass. As I walked to a female friend of mine and passed the girl on my way, I did notice how she stared at me. My female friend is a friend of her too, so after a time she came to us to say goodbye. The alcohol kicked, my mood was great and I did still touched her as like nothing happened, she reached her hand to me out to say goodbye, I took her hand and gave her this bro ellbow hug because I felt funny at this moment.

So now I showed off vulnerability in two cases. I expressed how I felt in this moment. I know I dont have experience to generalize it but is this how vulnerability works? To filter out the girls without personality against the girls with personality. The first one had a very sweet and confident character with her own individual interests. The second one seemed more bland, shy and didn't asked questions back (but thats maybe because of the language barrier).

My aim isn't to fuck as many girls as possible, I just want to have relationships with cool and fun quality girls which I like.