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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, you have to set the terms yourself or the girl sets them for you.
[–]Lead ModeratorThrowawayPUA 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
I'm going to have a talk with her next time we're together and give her an ultimatum.
That is how you become the ex-boyfriend.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]NotAnotherPUA 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I had to reread your post 3 times. What exactly is she doing you don't like? It sounds like you are fuck buddies without being able to sleep around. That basically sounds like a relationship without a title.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
omg! i get it. as been mentioned earlier, you guys have no title for what's going on but you have deep feelings for her!
you guys missed the point to talk it all out. if you have serious feelings and demand(you did!) a monogamous relationship, make that clear.
good luck. you are better off with no relationship at all than a long painful ongoing process.
[–]NotAnotherPUA 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I can say with 100% certainty that giving her an 1 of 3 choices will weaken your position.
Not sure what the best move is, but i would ask if you can have an open relationship. My logic would be that if she lets me, I find out that I was already in a really weak spot so it didnt matter. If she doesnt let me, I can then be in the driver seat on the terms.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]new_player 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This isn't really pick up related, what you're asking for is relationship advice.
But I can say that you need to be happy with whatever you decide for your interactions, and if that means you're not getting what you want from her you need to man up and communicate that. If you want an exclusive relationship with all the titles, responsibilities and addendums then straight up tell her. She may not be cool with that, and that'll be the end of it.
Sounds like you already know what you need to do.
[–]Lead ModeratorThrowawayPUA 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
How would you feel if a woman gave you an ultimatum? Why do guys try to avoid "The Talk" and have their relationship defined?
The way you seduce a woman sets her expectations for the level of relationship. Lots of guys stumble into a relationship and don't know what they want out of it. That's fine, because part of the reason we get into relationships is to find out what we want and what we need from women. But if you go into a relationship without any intent, don't be too surprised if you have a rather ambiguous status. So your situation was defined a long time ago, before you ever realized it.
And anyway, who gives a fuck about definitions? If you enjoy your relationship, don't mess with it. But nobody ever talked a woman into a specific type of relationship. It just doesn't work, you're asking her to rationally define her emotional responses. So the ultimatum is going to backfire.
If you want a different level of relationship, lead her there by engaging her emotions. But to be a leader, someone has to follow. If she doesn't follow, that will be your signal.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
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[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lead ModeratorThrowawayPUA 1 point2 points3 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]NotAnotherPUA 0 points1 point2 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]NotAnotherPUA 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]new_player 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Lead ModeratorThrowawayPUA 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link