Long story short I fucked up and shat where I ate. I gamed up my co-worker and got her to like me, she then asked me to allow her to be my girlfriend.

The fucked up part is, I just wanted to have sex and that's it BUT she actually got me liking her too...in a romantic sort of way. We dated briefly but broke up for her petty reasons. (FYI this girl also has low self esteem but a high sex drive)

So here we are now broken up, me sad and her...whatever. And today I saw her holding hands with some other loser. I haven't felt that type of emotional pain since middle school literally. It was almost like a punch to the gut. I felt so angry and weak and vulnerable. This was the first girl I ever exposed myself too and she took advantage of it. NEVER AGAIN will I let my guard down to another woman NEVER. Shit...I'm actually on the verge of crying as I type this right now...Its been so long I forgot what heartbreak felt like...I don't ever want to feel this way again.

Sitting here remembering the times we had, the time I spent with her meant a lot to me, I didn't think we'd get on like we did...

I can't work at that place anymore. I'm job hunting now. I've never turned from challenge, yet I am without strength to face this one.

Will getting another girl end this feeling?