Hi Seddit,

I've been lurking here for the past couple of months, definitely picked up some stuff and have been generally working on my core confidence recently.

Last night, I went to a massive party (dub/dubstep), took some MDMA. I am normally one of the quietest people at a party, but I was on FIRE last night. I had honestly believed that opening sets would be much more difficult, this was the first time I did it completely intentionally. I danced round solo (my friends were mainly sat down), met so many new people! Very much an eye opener, although maybe people were just being more accepting because I was obviously on something. I noticed I was kino'ing everyone, literally everyone I spoke to, and it felt so natural. Some people were definitely receptive to it, although others were obviously pissed off when I asked for hugs (literally 3 people, 2 of which were two dudes standing alone together looking cool, the other was a girl who I know is very much a prude, and I apologized for invading her space a bit much)

On top of the opening, I asked 3 girls just straight up to make out (I'd been telling them how amazing hugging felt etc). Expecting a bitch slap to the face each time, one told me no, then gave me a kiss on the cheek while smiling and softly holding my arm (from underneath, I'd think that's less of a dominant/defensive action on her part than if she was holding it on top). Second girl just went for it, made out, she asked for a three way kiss with a dude. I declined.

Final girl: I asked her, she gets all preening etc

Her - "But I won't see you tomorrow"

Me - "Fine, I'll come to where you live" (know where she lives, she is one of fairly few people staying in the area of her school in a boarding house)

Her - "No you won't, no you won't"

Me - "What do I get if I prove you wrong?" "You won't come, I know you won't"

The body language was incredibly strong, so I think if I wanted to I could go get laid. I won't, but I will go there so as to remain a man of my word.

IMPORTANT: This is in NO way a recommendation for AFCs (or anyone for that matter) to try MDMA to deal with AA etc. I had an amazing time, and to really feel that sociability come so easily was truly incredible, but that shit can mess you up.

EDIT: By all means, let me know if I need to add anything, if this is inapproriate due to the drug use etc etc.