Personal TL;DR - 5y LTR crushed me. Got fat, got lame, badly dressed, depressed, generally a douche with major women angst.

Now: Hit the gym, upgraded wardrobe, upgraded state of mind and personality. Just starting to date again, feel comfortable around women. Feel like I've become somebody people enjoy being around.

Used to be a charming life of the party, feel that coming back. I feel like I can control a groups tenor and keep the conversation interesting.

[FR] Met chick on okcupid.com, chatted, told her were we hanging out ( no bullshit afc asking ) she agreed. Exchanged numbers, kept texts short, brief and inconsistently timed ( as recommended ). Inspired by an idea by Tofu ( I think? ) from a while back. Bought each other gifts. Hit up Starbucks afterwards.

Overall I maintained a decent frame, moved the convo ok I think, obliterated awkward silence. Always moved away from interview, kept her laughing, DHV'ed. My kino is bad but it warmed up. Sat next to her instead of across. Possible IoI's.

Things I would have done better:

  • More Kino, gotta work on this.
  • Lead the encounter, sometimes I let the AFC get the better of me and followed her lead.

Been reading seddit for a long time now I've read the sidebar and everything, just have a couple of questions.

*After the hangout yesterday I'm going away for a long weekend. How do I keep things attraction flowing? *

She's an hour away and there I have no idea whats in her area. Can't pull a "I'm going to be at ----- at 8pm, meet me there". Don't want to give up a Saturday night so is "Hey, blankety blank restaurant looks interesting, lets eat there Thursday at 7pm" the right move?

Also, this could be oneitus but I had a surprisingly good time with her. I know PUA dictates more aggression and "find failure fast" but I reserve that for the random bar meetups. I honestly just want to call her to talk. She is interesting. Is this bad?

Wanted to also leave a note to Seddit in general.

I'm no PUA and seek slightly more than short term hook ups but the content here has been invaluable in terms of boosting confidence and how to build attraction.

I'd recommend any downtrodden AFCs to just stick with what this community says and it will pay off.

I've changed a lot since my last breakup and a lot of it has been because of seddits constant reminder to "man the fuck up and get out there". Its not only changing my dating world but also my personal lief. Every little bit of confidence adds on and I'm really starting to feel like a fun and exciting person again.