I'm completing three years of my seduction journey this May 2017, I've immersed heavily into seduction putting stuff like my career on a back burner. I've gotten laid, I've become more social, I have also overcome a daily pizza eating addiction(Yes, I know, some people it's smoking, some drinking, some drugs, for me it was Pizza). Despite all my efforts and results, ever so often I feel unhappy with my progress, I feel I should be ahead. I've read quite a lot, more than I would like to Admit, I've read a few books cover to cover and mostly picking up a book and leaving it half way. I've consistently gone out not only to "sarge" but I've built up a decent social circle, reestablished communication with cousins and school best friends and done a lot of outdoor stuff compared to two years ago of sitting around binge watching TV shows and surfing the Internet all day.
I feel seduction is a balance of action and education, I feel unhappy because I'm not consistent with what I'm learning. I repeat the same basic mistakes over and over while acting. I've decided from today, that I need to identify sticking points and work on them diligently. I've identified the first set of behaviors/habits/mindset I would like ingrained in me.
A shift from comfortability seeking to day to day adventure in Nature, Business, and Women
My Default State - Passion for life and its scars. Living through excitement, humor, anticipation(positive visualization) and playfulness and going for what I want with pure Masculine Drive Being Focused - Working in Clock Time, ie. deciding for the next X hours I am doing this and being focused on it, also when unmotivated committing to just 10 mins of doing and achieving Flow for the X hours. After X hours detaching from the task and returning to My Default State. Producer Mindset - Looking to start trends, becoming a producer and profiting off of the trend that I produce. The profiting is secondary the starting something is Primary. Results Mindset - If I check for results on a daily basis I can give up easily, usually, things have to be given time, I've found the minimum required time for practicing anything new is 90-days. (Clock Time learned from Power of Now, Commit to 10 mins of working learned from War of Art, Producer Mindset learned from Gorilla Mindset - All 3 books half read, I take what I can)
Indifference - The ability to let which does not matter truly slide
There are no reframes. Reframes like "other people are more worried about what you think of them", "always polarize", "cool guys never run" - all these make me focus on the external while the internal want is an afterthought. Indifference is going for what I want and not caring about what's external - people, situations or outcomes. It's also a way of saying "yeah, I've tried a lot, failed a lot, but I have more because the more I try the more opportunities I get, the more scars I get, I'm enlightened coz of them". (Inspired by the Movie Fight Club and the 20 hours Blueprint Decoded DVD by RSD - Tyler)
Look up and face the uncomfortable
There is no alpha body language trick or "should I or should I not fish for eye contact", we have an age-old survival instinct called fight or flight, it does not really help us today in a social context, in fact, its automatic impulse and aggression makes our "social survival" in the long term worse. There are no body language, eye contact or vocal tricks to seem alpha. The only way is to actually start being Alpha. Look up and face what is uncomfortable till I get comfortable with that and then face the next situation I find uncomfortable. Disclaimer: The sub communication suggestions do help shorten the learning curve at the start, eventually we need to feed of responses from the social environment (Inspired by experiences of going out and meeting women in the streets)
The Blind Spot (This might not be true, but helps me get laid)
I will get laid because women are friendly and sexual. And I know that its GAME NOT appearance(money, looks or status) is what gets girls and I am the shit. Disclaimer : I've seen appearance get better responses from women at the beginning of the interaction, I am good looking and with proper grooming I get looked at a lot, I have money for myself and daily logistics but not to spend at clubs, being a nerd all my life, I don't have club promoter status showcasing friends either. My pre-game seductions were based on being groomed and looking good, while I could approach back then also, I could not hold interactions, most interactions ended with me being afraid to ask for a number or when I did, I failed to escalate or I escalated to a "What the fuck are you doing?". You can have "appearance" and it will get you through the door, but Game keeps you in the house and eventually the Bedroom.
Tribes and Gangs
I will have a tribe because good men are mostly beta and are looking for a strong masculine leader. Other masculine leaders are looking to collaborate with me. (This mindset helps me a lot in business and working with people on a daily basis)
Being open and listening
It's sad that our human innate automatic response to people of perceived higher value or lower value is we try to get away, for lower value people we want to not listen to them, for higher value people we feel unworthy or feel we need to be better prepared and get all nervous and in our heads. Firstly, I say destroy the appearance-based social ladder, there are no values, just People, understanding that I can grow from interacting with anyone is key to being open. Secondly, this ties into the "Look up and face the uncomfortable" - or irritating. People have their own values, beliefs, ideas and opinions, only by listening we can be open to contrasting intellects and emotions. The decision to accept, reject or keep on the fence what we've heard is up to only me. The keyword is "Curiosity", works wonders with women and works well if you want to start a social group, Be interested in people. (Boundary Function, Curiosity and Collaborative Imagination learned from From MindOS)
Do not take yourself too seriously
Imagine a world where people do not read, they do not know about fight or flight responses and go by living life based on how they "feel". In truth much of the stress people give you is based on their fight or flight(impulsive and aggressive) responses. The best way to take nothing personally is understand why people do what they do, put yourself in their shoes as they say. Why? As a seducer of life, Am I in the business of defending my fragile ego or am I in the business of achieving what I want for my life? It's natural to feel stress(anger n anxiety) when someone else around is dumping stress onto me. But as a modern Man I need to 1. Figure out why someone is doing what they are doing, figuring out the reason for their fight or flight 2. Remembering what I want from this situation. 3. Responding appropriately to the situation. (Path to Action learned from the book Crucial Conversations, I use this at my job to hear people out, which as a project lead I need as an essential skills. I also use it when I feel a woman is shit testing me)
Humor is the best policy
Most people who dish out stress are actually seeking attention and comfort, its ok to comfort these people, lend them support. There are some who give out healthy stress as a means to an end. for eg. A boss stresses you out(often in a calm way) when a deadline in approaching so that you finish the project on time, he's not stressing you out coz he wants to be a dick, he's stressing you out because of a deadline. However, ever so often you come across this passive aggressive guy who on the surface is all "yay" but he hits you with a vocal jab whenever he can, it's like he's just angry at the world. The first way to deal with this is indifference, let it slide and ignore him. In today's entitled world, people keep going hence, the second way is Humor.
Will update new in a few weeks, after I get these on properly
For those curious about the books I've read cover to cover are
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