I've been spending the last month or so working to overcome my anxiety and improve my dating life by approaching girls (at coffee shops, on campus, at group fitness classes, etc), starting conversations, and if things go well, asking them out.

​

I know that studying might be an unusual first date, but here's where I'm coming from; I'm a CS student in university with a full course load, I work part-time, and have an active lifestyle. I'm into girls who are passionate, ambitious, and are just generally interested in doing meaningful things with their lives. The thing is, these girls tend to be really busy. The last couple of girls that I went out with were full-time students and had part-time jobs that they worked evenings and weekends. Between my busy schedule and theirs, setting up the first dates with these girls was a mess.

​

I realized that it might reduce some of the friction if we could meet up to study together, which is something that we would both want to do anyway. I study with friends all the time, and it works well. I find it's pretty easy to mix conversation in with actual work and get the best of both worlds. The thing is, how do I use this as a first date without giving the girl the impression that I just want to be friends or study buddies? What I'm really looking for here is to get the know the girl a bit better, and let her get to know me, so that she can become more invested, and maybe be more willing to make some time in her schedule for dating.