I am a single guy. I am not desperate for your attention and I don’t sit around waiting for you to call/text/email me when you feel like it. That’s just some shitty little game that you are playing on your own. When I say I’m busy it’s because I am, not because I’m trying to be cool. I don’t understand what you mean by ‘taking it slowly’, nor can I really be bothered to work it out. I don’t believe that sex is a gift you give me in return for relationship status or putting up with your shit. I do not exist purely to buy you dinner and boost your ego. I do not think that you’re the one or that by some improbable chance you’re my best option. There are 3 and half billion more females on the planet. Do the math. I don’t care for your hot and cold behaviour or you acting like you’re some sort of ‘prize’ that I have to win. I do not refrain from going out with my friends, getting drunk, kissing other girls and taking numbers just because we’re ‘dating’. I am not your ATM machine, counsellor or coach.

I am a single guy. Send the next one in on your way out.