Hi all,

Background: I rarely go out, always found an excuse to not do it and stay home. There is a massive advantage which I have as well. I live downtown and am close to hundreds of bars/ clubs in the city. Everything is walkable, yet I barely took advantage of this opportunity the past year.

So this week, I decided to challenge myself and start going out every weekend to different places to socialize with people and meet girls. After I came back from work late last night, I also decided to bring my roommate with me as a wingman.

We decided to go to a well known bar in the city earlier around 9:30 pm to play some pool. My intention was to just play and loosen up a little bit. As we entered the bar, there wasn't that many people which was great because it allowed us to find a pool table to play on easily.

To get out of my head, I started chatting with a couple that was playing pool before us and included my roommate in the conversation. This allowed me to be more comfortable and definitely feel more social in the environment I was in.

After playing two games, dozens of good looking girls started coming in and the venue began to be packed. This is where I decided I needed to act and start approaching. I saw a group of three Asian girls and decided to approach with the simple 'Hi I'm...' with a big smile and good energy. I also introduced my wingman a minute later. The conversation wasn't great as it felt like a Q & A, and also two of them were literally quiet and not engaged at all (on their phones) even when I was trying to include them in the conversation. After a few minutes, I bailed.

Second time, I approached two young girls that were looking at us a few times and did the same sort of approach with 'Hi how's it going'. They were a little bit more engaged than the last ones and the conversation was pretty good, but I lost interest when one of them told me she had a boyfriend and I realize I wasn't that attracted to her.

Third approach was a few minutes later, with these two tall sisters who were just standing in the middle of the bar. Same high energy approach ensued but again, it seems that the conversation we had was pretty dry and Q & A again. So I also bailed a few minutes later.

We were quite tired as we had a long work day yesterday and left around 11:30.

What did I learn last night?

My roommate made a valid point when we were walking back home. It is important to approach at the right time. I felt like I was just approaching for the sake of it without trying to get the timing right. I was attempting to get the massive rust off as I hadn't went out and approached in months.

Secondly, I realized I need to start being more flirtatious and tease more in my conversations. Q & A can only go so far to establish comfort with girls until it fizzles out completely. This is one aspect I wasn't particularly applying last night.

I also have to mention that that place had lots of very young girls. All the girls I talked with were under 24. To me, after multiple approaches, it seemed that girls under 25 have much less to give/show and definitely lack conversation skills. But its definitively a generalization and not all of them are like that.

It could be also for my lack of experience to bring the interest out of them, but it would have been nice to have some engagement from their side. It was definitely very minimal. But that is why it's crucial to understand that it's a numbers game, and the more you approach wisely, the higher the probability of clicking with somebody.

Most importantly I had fun, and I didn't regret a single thing. I did my best for what it was in that moment. It also makes me realize that these socializing nuances can only be learned through trial and error situations. This is why it needs to be consistent.

So let me know what you think of it and if you have any advice for my future approach endeavors. I think I'll be doing these posts more often to allow me to analyze the possible improvements. Thanks