So I (M26) been hooking up with this girl (28)who is a friend of mine and we have the same friend circle as well. It’s not a regular thing but like once in 2/3 months we’ll get it on and then go our ways, it’s good banter and fun but no emotional stuff or expectations to chat about how our day was in between.

Yesterday I met her after a long time and we were driving to another friends event, in the car there was playful touching throughout and we were making jokes about what to do after the event (going back to her place) to which she jokingly said ‘no you always end up staying over at my place so we’re not going there to drink haha’. (We usually drink and hook up at her house) however by the end of the 1 hour drive she was like okay maybe. (Note: it was kinda clear wha I was expecting at the end of the night)

At the event we’re drinking with other people and figuring where to go next, and this girl just flips and goes noo you are not stayin with me and starts drunk telling my other friend to take me back, which kinda bummed me out like why do you have to tell the world about what’s going on.

But in between drinks she keeps asking me what is your plan, what is your scene - I realised I didn’t have any clarity about how to navigate this and certainly couldn’t communicate it.

Eventually I ended up dropping her and driving back with another friend.

What happened here? Should I have pushed her more towards going back to her place? but I don’t wanna come across as coercive, and also she has a history of sexual assault.

Or told her off that ‘ dude chill even I don’t wanna come to yours either’/ you’re no amazing prize’ , when she proclaimed to my friend that don’t let him come to my place.

I feel worst about dropping her back because of my inbuilt nice guy syndrome, should’ve just asked her to Uber it considering the situation. Eager to know what you’re thinking