Young 20yr old needs Advice

Anniesdreams · 2025-01-06T02:13:44+00:00

Women are completed creatures but one thing i have noticed is that often times men go for the conventionally pretty women or those that fit there beauty standard instead of that may not appear conventionally beautiful or fit their standard.

This isn't wrong but the downside is sometimes those pretty girls are the play girls and the maybe even average looking women have great personalities. This isn't always the case though. But in order to find a good woman irrespective of physical aspects you have to look beyond initial charm and focus on the little things that give you a glimpse into their personality.

Like how they treat others, especially when they think no one is watching or they have no reason to be nice. There value system and beliefs. How they handle interactions with the opposite sex. This may sound insignificant but how a woman treats men that like or have feelings that have been made known to them matters. S ome women pretend to like men so they can enjoy the benefits of having an admirer and feel loved. Some give of rejections harshly without a second thought of the man's feelings.

This is probably why you fear reaction but know that the woman who tells you no straight up and direct is better than one that leaves you without a definite answer only to keep tagging you along with false hopes. This might sound irrelevant but woman with high levels of empathy make good partners often. Also don't always feel the need to make the first move if you have tried at least twice and she is not reciprocating albeit slightly

Sadly men are often expected to make the first move and it is unlikely to change anytime soon so it's okay to have a fear of rejection but you have to try your best to overcome it. Also as a Christian you should always pray to God for guidance and confidence when it comes to relationships. But don't believe that everybody who shares your belief system for example is a Christian ot seems to have strong values is a good person or the one for you.

Civil_Income9396 · 2025-01-06T02:12:44+00:00

We are the same age, you’re doing well for now. Don’t lose yourself over a “play girl” ussulay you won’t find a good girl on tinder. You will Definelty get more girls once you have a motorcycle, but that shouldn’t be your goal on why you want to get one, you get one to make you happier. The right one will be chasing you and not other way around from what I learned. BIG but, you should also play with those “playgirls” they will build character for you. Something you’ll need later on in your relationship.

Top_Chocolate_4203 · 2025-01-06T15:51:19+00:00

Here's the deal, young warrior:

Rejection is the Road: You're already on a path of discipline and purpose with your studies, faith, and family responsibilities. Rejection in dating is just another challenge to grow from. It's not about you; it's about compatibility.
Value Alignment: You're looking for a match in mindsets, not just attraction. Keep your standards high but be open to meeting someone in unexpected places. Your current environment might not be the best hunting ground for what you're looking for, so expand your social circles.
The Military Move: Your plan to join the military will expose you to a diverse group of people, potentially aligning you with someone who values the same level of commitment and stability. It's also a chance to further your personal growth.
Patience and Timing: At 20, with your trajectory, you're ahead of many. Understand that the right relationship will come when you're both ready. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself; the right woman will recognize your value.
Expand Your Horizons: Don't limit yourself to your immediate surroundings. Attend events, join clubs or groups that interest you, especially those that might attract like-minded individuals. Online communities for your faith or interests can also be goldmines.
Self-Improvement Over Seduction: You don't need to 'seduce' when you're genuinely improving yourself. Your confidence, purpose, and faith are attractive. Keep nurturing these.
Motorcycle as Metaphor: Just like with your bike, take this journey one step at a time. Learn the controls, the road, the balance. In dating, learn to read people, understand social dynamics, and balance your approach.

Want to dive deeper into making your life not just successful but fulfilling? Check my profile for insights that go beyond just getting a date.

K_m-f · 2025-01-06T19:21:49+00:00

All you can do is learn to develop some mental toughness now and try to gain some experience so when somebody who you really click with shows up, you're ready.

SnappinFool54 · 2025-01-06T21:45:53+00:00

This is a weird and fun stage of life.

When I was your age, fourteen years ago (fuck I'm saying that now), I was 2 years into a college relationship that ended up being with the woman that I married (16 total years together). When we got together, she was my first (I wasn't holding onto my virginity for any reason, it just never happened in HS... Then after 6 weeks of fall football camp, I was looking to stick anything that moved lol) but I wasn't her first.

We were from two completely different walks of life. I was raised Southern Baptist, had a great family life, HS football kid who made it to the next level. She came from a very wealthy family that was destroyed by her dad's drug habits which led to him physically abusing her. Which in turn caused her to have issues of her own. He took what was a young girl who had the chance to be a pro tennis player and buried her in a dark place mentally.

I remember the day that she walked into my Political Science class, I swore she was a junior/senior. Carried herself well, looked mature, dressed professionally, and was built like an hourglass. It took a few weeks for us to link up for conversation, I actually broke "bro-code" to get her. I found out that she was a freshman like myself and a few of the guys on the FB team had their eyes on her, one of which she was actually talking to. During study hall one day, I saw one of the guys FB messaging her, so I took the time to peek over his shoulder for her name and that was all she wrote.

I say all that to say this:

I see that you are faith-oriented, and completely respect that. However, have fun and play some if you are open to it. Take it from someone who's had the key in one lock... You always wonder how the key fits other locks. Not in an "I want to cheat way" but in a way that makes you curious (hope that makes sense).
Modern Women are less in line with your faith mindset, especially at a college (unless it is a small-town college locally). You are going to have to weed through a lot to find "the one" that fits you morally (nothing wrong with that).
It's ok to be a "playboy" or at least have that mindset/swagger. Women have EVERYTHING thrown at them, especially the pretty ones. My wife says what hooked her to me is I "acted like I didn't have time for her" the first time she approached me while other guys were tripping over each other to talk to her.. She had her pic of the litter (after this, I reached out to her). I eventually told her that I didn't at the time, because I was chasing the pitcher on the Softball team lol. So putting yourself on a pedestal is fine.
Women who have been with other men are not broken or spoiled. As someone who comes from a somewhat religious family and an area that had a church on every street corner, it was pitched at me that one, and done was the move. My wife had emotional baggage that resulted in her seeking approval from men since her father couldn't provide that, so her "number" was a little higher than mine. Not by much, but if you add a lesbian relationship in there she had, I needed a second hand to count including myself. That being said, had I based the outcome of our relationship on that, I would have abandoned a beautiful relationship. (She's currently in the other room studying for the Bar Exam).
Be social:

- Go to the party down the block and mingle

- Go to the sports events on/around campus

- Hang out with a bachelor group of guys you are close with.

Opposites attract until they don't. My wife and I were polar opposites when we met (as described above). But don't let small differences detract from a natural attraction. Sure, if there is a deep moral issue, by all means go the other way. But I have faith and my wife is an atheist... (Christmas dinner was weird some years lol, but that was something i had to weigh when we got serious)

End of the day, have fun, it's college man.

Dandys3107 · 2025-01-06T09:33:14+00:00

Expand your opportunities to naturally interact with women. Even if you think you are decent in terms of your sexually attrative qualities, you should still keep improving them, women's interest rise exponentially. Surround yourself with people that support and empower you. Keep reading seduction theory.

Onzalimey · 2025-01-07T23:36:29+00:00

Just keep meeting girls. Eventually you’ll find one you resonate with well.

Title	Young 20yr old needs Advice
Author	zMFDOPE
Upvotes	0
Comments	13
Date	January 6, 2025 1:36 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1hunejp/young_20yr_old_needs_advice/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/young-20yr-old-needs-advice.1540468 https://theredarchive.com/post/1540468

Comments