So, i've improved my style, my game, my gainz, getting better and better. I got into college im september, and actually played the game really well on a girl and got her hooked on me. But besides that I got shit all.

I got a friend who has a nice face, nice eyes and is blonde and chicks falls for him left and right but he is such a fucking beta most of the time but still he can get laid easily but he doesnt see the lays and fucked only 1 of the hundreds of possibilities he had. But because of his looks, girls with higher status bring him into activities easily while the try hards like me have to dig their own way up.

Enough crying, the reason of this post is that girls dont seem to like my assholy type of personality, they think im 'weird' and ignore me, I just think im not doing it right somehow and its leaving out of my body in a cringy way, I blame my 0 practice and still big beta hamster in my head. I got a girl in my class that is a full on attention whore (props to TRP for finding this out, I laugh out loud to a guy in my course that falls for her shit and buys her shit all the time) and can kiss a guy and leave him there wanting more just for attention, and she is extremely upfront with everyone and she just straight up calls me ugly all the fucking time and it destroys me inside on those days where my beta hamster is running and I lose all my little confidence.

I really dont know, I mean, I try to follow everything here but I feel like girls just ignore me. Thanks to TRP tho I got at least 3 solid easily lays I let go due to approach anxiety and being affraid to approach and feeling like im not enough. I am one of those people who reads reads reads and 0 practice.

I only started having a "normal" social life since september, and I feel like it shows a lot. I feel like I have cringy conversations sometimes because of having null social skills, and I feel like I get a bit left out because of that. But still, I have a lot of big examples of friends who dont care about what they wear, dont care about their hair, about the way they talk and have even worse social skills than me and it reminds me of what I improved over the last year or TRP

But I just feel like that little 'click' noise that finally opens my eyes to the right light is missing and im having truble finding it. Its like, thanks to TRP I found the cave I wanted to get past but once inside I cant find the way out, so im only halfway there? Some guidance would be great, thanks for reading.