TL;DR: Natural Alpha grew up conditioned by blue pill turned beta and found TRP/MRP and reclaimed his masculine identity.

Introduction:
Me(M30), Wife(F29) Married at Me(19) and her(18). Married now for 11 years with 5 kids. What got me started on my RP journey a year ago was to seek out truths about why I was living the American dream and wasn’t happy about it. I had an intuitive mind to see a little deeper into the social encounters I was put in to avoid conflict at a very young age. That made me a lot more passive than I wanted to be. I was in good running shape. I played soccer and tennis when I met my wife. In writing this I hope to look back and improve upon the choices I’ve made and to help me own my shit better and hopefully help some of the lurkers that are in the same boat as I am into bettering themselves with the mass knowledge that’s here on this tread that is r/mrp and r/trp.

When I met my wife. I was a senior in high school. Back then I was Purple pill. With doing sports and my background culture of polygamy I had an abundance mentality. Girls was throwing themselves at me. But I never capitalize on it. I valued family, honesty and integrity a lot and with growing up with all the Disney movies I was out to look for that special unicorn (oneitis). I’m of Asian descent, polygamy is still practice in my culture here in the USA in secret. But with any assimilation the culture views switched to monogamy with very few polygamy now a days. Red pill is a universal truth that works on all women. Heh AWALT. Looking back when I met my wife. I was applying red pill truths before I even knew about it. Wish I know then what I know now but that’s water under the bridge. So I finally found my special unicorn knocked her up, man up and married her. Didn’t think much of it. Thank you! Family values, Integrity values and culture.

So I went to work not knowing what the fuck I was doing at 18 years old. Graduated high school and starting community college in the fall with a kid on the way. Wife still had another year of high school to finish. The stress was starting to mount. So begin my beta journey. Drunk captain mode ensue with Video game addiction, porn addiction and escapism as the years flew by I balloon up to 260lb. Oddly enough I wasn’t doing badly at all. Got through collage. Started exceling at my career. My finances was great. Bought my first car and eventually our home. I’m living the American Dream yall. Wife, kids and a big house. What more can a man ask for? But I wasn’t happy. Why? Wife has started to bitch more and became a harpy. I dove deeper into video games and porn addiction with no ambition. Started neglecting my children letting wife deal with everything adding me another man child. At my lowest of low I even fell in love with her younger sister. Wife sniffed it out and beta me came clean (nothing really happened between her sister and I). That was 6 years ago. Wife stayed faithful through all the shit I’ve put her through. A unicorn? Can confirm they exists. The next 4 years till I found the TRP and MRP I’ve always wondered what kept her ticking. Now I know.

Awakening: Looking back through the TRP lens. I was a natural Alpha with my background and upbringing with my cultural. With feminism in the west and all the Disney stuff on TV added to the blue pill conditioning. Turned me completely beta. I stumble upon TRP by pure chance/luck. And swallowed the pill and immediately putting in the work on becoming a better man a year ago. The Redpill validated in me what my natural gut instinct has always been trying to get me to do that had been repress by blue pill conditioning. Now that my mind is align with my natural instinct. Everything just feels right.

Owning my shit: Starting at my heaviest @ 270lb a year ago. Now down to 190lb. Workout cycle consist of 3 days cardio/lifting hard. 1 rest day and repeat at the gym. Batting shit tests left and right out of the ball park. Wife has so much Dread and I haven’t even attempted an approach. The saying “Be Attractive, not unattractive” rings true. I Stopped playing video game and dropped the porn completely. Took control of my finances. Started doing things that needed to get done without the wife telling me what to do. Funny thing is I never had any sex problem with my wife when I was a beta. Wife fell in love with me all over again. Her words not mine. It’s amazing how 99% of her shity attitude was my fault. Women will fill to whatever frame the alpha male build.

Reading: NNMNG, WISNIFG, The way of the Superior man, 48 laws of power, the art of seduction, The subtle art of not giving a fuck, Bang, Day Bang, The art of war, The Rational Male and The Red Queen: Sex and the evolution of Human Nature. Love all the posting from the Family Alpha. Everything on the side bar. Currently reading How to win friends and Influence People in the digital age.

Conclusion: I just want to personally thank this community for existing because it latterly gave my life direction and things to work towards and that is putting myself first and foremost. If I can’t make myself happy how can I expect a woman to do it for me?