No one is more important than you.
Not to me personally, or to anyone else, but in your own life you are the most important person and the decisions in what to do with your life, for good or bad, for fun or failure, for joy or despair are yours. No one else, no matter what shaming language they use, or how they manipulate you because of their relationship to you, knows better how to live your life than you do.
That does not mean that you should reject the advice of others out of hand. Consider it, listen to it, as all wise men do, but decide for yourself if it has merit, if it has value, or if it is in fact hollow or manipulative, or serves the other person.
If advice is filled with shaming language, or moral commands, then it does not serve your interests, it serves theirs. Conservatives and liberals in general are both enemies of men, for they would hem you in with what they value, what serves their interests and needs, what makes them feel safe.
Men have always been able to overcome obstacles, to find solutions, to find meaning in conflict and camaraderie. Do not let them take this from you. Do not hide from your life, or make excuses. Go forth and do what men have always done. Eschew those things that are anti-male.
Your parents. They grew up in a different time, a different place even. As Joseph Campbell pointed out, what was moral three generations ago, may be immoral now. Their perceptions are filtered by when they grew up. Their understanding of the human condition was formed during their formative years. Never forget that their judgments are based on their past, not your present.
You only get one life.
I don’t care which religion gets it right, you only get one.
Atheists. Clearly if they are right, you die, there is nothing more.
Agnostics. They make a push, they refuse to choose.
Christianity, Islam, Zoroastrianism. You either go to heaven or hell, your one shot in the game of life was on earth, there are no second chances. (Granted there are the last days when the quick and the dead are judged, but again the situation is over).
Judaism. This is it.
Buddhism. Hinduism. New Ageism. You’re not coming back as yourself.
As Shakespeare noted: “A brave man dies only once, a coward dies a thousand deaths.”
It does not matter if you are Alpha, Beta or Omega. A seducer, or going your own way. Those are your choices to make, make them. Do not hide, do not cower. Be a lion in your own life. Take the path that suits you, not the one they want to force on you.
Do not be a slave to others. Not only is there no one better or more important than you, there is no one equal to you in your own life. They may share part of it, but the tribulations are all yours and so are the triumphs.
You are the hero in your life.
Never apologize for what you have done, accept it and stand proud.
