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NothingOrAllLife Archive

View 5 posts and 6,634 comments by NothingOrAllLife on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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5

You literally didn’t read anything about this case and you’re purposefully misrepresenting it. She was convicted, served ten years and had her sentence quashed because her husband was abusive.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 02:15 PM
3

Go get a job and stop worrying about dating when you’re 35+ and can’t take care of yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:48 PM
9

Dude, you guys are jsur focused on the extremely attractive women you want (or the women you’ve convinced yourselves were average) simps are not an issue for the majority of women. Yes women get compliments sometimes. But those compliments aren’t making women refuse dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:47 PM
9

lol, being a simp is a spectrum? Some man telling you you’re pretty and holding the door is not even in the same ballpark as him funding your lifestyle and paying for things. Simps are not an issue. Being complimentary as a man is not an issue. Most women don’t have men trailing after them willing and able to do anything for a crumb of her attention. Redpill men see what they want to see.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:20 PM
6

I’m sorry, you’re 35+ working at McDonald’s? Your issue is not the you’re poor it’s that you’re patently unmotivated. I was going to say just date women in your socioeconomic class. You need to go learn a trade or something. Get an iron for yourself instead of using it as a means to attract women. Even ugly women aren’t going to date a broke 35+ year old who is “too good” to work at McDonald’s but also can’t maintain any other job.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 03:18 PM
1

Depends on what? I don’t think they’d be equally good at the same things, like if it’s something my dad knows more about I’d expect my husband to also listen to him. But as a grown adult I’m not asking my dad unless I think he has something to offer and then I’d talk about whatever issue was with my husband and we would decide together?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/26 02:03 AM
11

How the hell are they able to snag a younger woman if they aren’t attractive???
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/26 02:00 AM
2

Are you saying FGM is not sexually debilitating for the women and girls forced to endure it? I know race is a no-no here but you should really not assume mine in this convo.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 08:22 PM
2

Both are issues. One is tied in religious doctrine and not meant to essentially cripple the victim. If you let people choose when they’re older, some men would choose to be circumcised. No woman would choose FGM. FGM is much much worse. Both are bad, but FGM is designed to be debilitating. If circumcision were done with the same goal (removing the ability for pleasure) those men would be unable to reproduce naturally.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/04/26 06:07 PM
2

Approaching first as a woman has little benefit. Some men will fuck anyone if given the chance: now she’s telling him she’s interested without him having to put forth any effort. It’s makes the process simple for men and risky for women. For men, at the end of the day, if you’re worried about a woman taking advantage of you, all you have to do is not buy her things/take her out/do excessive stuff for her to see if she’s genuine. A woman that’s interested in you, for you, won’t be upset if you ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 08:48 PM
1

It’s the same amount of work. If he’s doing everything for her, instead of teaching her the skills that he has that allow him to survive, he’s doing more work. Just so he can fuck his pet
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 08:34 PM
1

It’s the same amount of extra responsibility for the man. The only difference is he’s fucking her.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 06:33 PM
8

FGM is also done when the girl is old enough to remember, while she’s being held down and with no pain medication. It is done specifically to remove the ability for pleasure in a marriage that she will later be forced into. Every woman I’ve spoken to that’s had FGM done to her remembers something horrifying about it. They remember being afraid. They remember someone forcing them still. And some of them remember the pain. FGM IS worse. Both are issues
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 12:02 PM
1

Not sure where the pet this is coming from but by your explanation, both scenarios she’s a pet. The second guy just wants to fuck the pet. He’s not even making sure she has an orgasm. There’s no way you think the second man is treating her like a partner at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 11:56 AM
3

No good options? I’m assuming both these men were single before coming to this island. If one man way gay what would be happening? If the woman was a little girl what would be happening? There are so many options here outside of coerce someone into a physically relationship. Why not be a good person and teach this woman to fend for herself in this environments. That way there are two able bodies able to help keep the tiny society you have peaceful?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 11:53 AM
1

No she’s saying the men in prison that are having sex with a buffet stronger man. Because that bigger stronger man gives him an “option.”
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/26 11:47 AM
3

And the exception in today’s dating landscape is a man asking for a cheaper date just because it’s financially responsible.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 08:23 PM
4

You’re assuming all men are asking for cheap dates to save money. No, a lot of them are doing it these days because some alpha male podcast told them it was the best way to see if a woman was interested in you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 06:15 PM
9

It a shit test because of the intent. Example. I don’t like dinner first dates because I think sharing a meal with someone is a social activity best done when you know the other person a bit. If your only reason for asking for a cheap date is because you want to see if she would say yes then it’s a shit test. If you mention something to gauge her reaction, shit test. Doing anything to your partner where you are purposefully setting them up to be able to react in a wrong way is a shit test. For m…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 05:28 PM
2

If it’s done subconsciously is it a shit test?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 04:19 PM
17

But don’t men do the same thing? “Invite her to do something cheap/free” if she says no she’s not into you. Men shit test all the time under the guise of figuring out if a partner is actually into them.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 02:00 PM
18

So it is okay to “shit-test” if it’s to see if someone really likes you?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 11:04 AM
–

Have you seen this guys replies? I’m good.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/04/26 12:03 AM
–

Ultimately feminine. Like I read that as him sharing he wants someone extremely feminine. As in boss level feminine. What would that even look like? Or was he saying at the end the only thing that mattered was that the woman was feminine? The qualifier is what I take issue with.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:59 PM
–

If we were as evil as these men portrayed us they wouldn’t have the ability to get online and post this nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:52 PM
–

women won’t sleep with me so they shouldn’t have rights is hilarious!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:52 PM
–

Ultimately feminine wasn’t an issue for you?!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 11:50 PM
0

The only men that care about this are men that feel they are inadequate when compared to any other man. Personally, I’ve never thought about my ex or anyone else when I was dating someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 02:29 PM
–

You’ve met the majority of fat women?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 08:45 PM
11

This is the answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/26 01:16 PM
–

I’m not trying to. I’m just pointing out that per you, men can be perfectly fine and happy with just masturbation.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:24 PM
–

So, just to clarify men ARE actually okay being virgins forever as long as they can convince themselves they are having sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:18 PM
7

And does she retain access to whatever power he was letting her have?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:27 PM
7

You’re cherry picking benefits and ignoring cost. Not to mention conflating access to power. The very same woman that gets free dinner also gets harassment, stalking, unsolicited messages, and pressure to perform femininity constantly. It also only describes men’s choices, not women’s influence over them. If men didn’t want to pay for dates they wouldn’t. Calling men’s voluntary behavior female power removes the accountability from men. Sexual power (whatever this is) doesn’t come with political…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:18 PM
14

This is a terrible reduction of the horrors people faced when powerful men exert their influence. But go off.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:13 PM
4

None of that is power though. If a man is only after sex once he gets it he’s done. And if he doesn’t get it he’s done. Sex is actually the biggest weakness in the “gender war” for women. Not because men want it. But because once men get it they lose interest and if a woman has too much of it, apparently men will lose interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:12 PM
8

None of that has anything to do with sexual power. If a man dates you just for sex, he’s not going do half those things once he has sex with you. And if he’s dating tug just for sex, he’s not going to hold of if you don’t have sex with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:09 PM
3

Have you been on a date with a man lately?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:07 PM
13

Which men? Men that aren’t having sex with her or the ones that are? If they are having sex with her, then isn’t her power gone? There’s no sexual power women can wield.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:06 PM
39

What does sexual power even get you as a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 07:47 PM
1

I can be attracted to someone and not see them as a good partner. Them not having a job would make them unattractive. Men have an issue with this because they expect nothing from their partners but looks. However , this lack of expectation, paradoxically , leads to disappointment later. You picked someone who only had one thing to offer: sure she’s attractive, but that’s a naive and silly reason to be the foundation of a relationship. A man that has “it” for me has never EVER been just the hotte…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 05:28 PM
1

I would never date anyone who can’t work for no reason. I would never expect to not work and just be taken care of without a good reason for it. My husband/partner making enough money is not a good enough reason. Also it is entirety not appropriate for ANY 30+ person to be jobless and have their lifestyle depend on another person. Male or female. If there a reason my partner can’t work of course I will support him. But I would never knowingly even go on a date with someone that didn’t have a job…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:38 PM
1

So you got married and she stopped working? Was it a famous musician because mist musicians are actually not well-off? Drug dealer? This is interesting: how many well-adjusted women do you know that are willing to date drug dealers?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:35 PM
1

Were you okay with her not working? I’m assuming there were children?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:27 PM
2

No. If a person can’t support themselves they shouldn’t be dating. I’m in my 30s. Men and women should not date people my age that cannot hold down a job. Or can’t keep an apartment. Or can’t be responsible. I’m fine dating someone that makes a little less than me, but if he’s jobless in his 30s with no…nothing? It’s not like he is going to improve or grow.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:25 PM
2

Were you supporting these girlfriends? I ask about amount because men portray the world as if women can go out and find a very high earning man walking down the street: they can’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:23 PM
1

How much do you make?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:20 PM
1

What does that mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 02:59 PM
2

But were you broke? Did she have to seriously change her lifestyle so that you could fit into it?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 03:11 AM
19

Untrue : I wouldn’t care how much physically my type a guy is. If he doesn’t have a job as a fully grown adult he is not for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/03/26 01:23 AM
2

See, that’s also beneficial information because from the way you first presented it, it seemed like it was something that was always off the table for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 08:15 PM
1

Wait, what do you mean “we did a bunch of stuff in the beginning?”
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 06:58 PM
–

I’m reusing this reply here: was it for things they enjoyed doing? Like threesomes/group stuff i can see being into that at one point and then no longer wanting to share your partner with others. But it’s hard for me to understand how someone will willingly condemn themselves to an unsatisfactory sex life for a partner who - per you - they aren’t really into. He’s either worth it or he’s not right? Part of it seems like it’s reinforcing the “sex as a treat” trope. Like the woman did those things…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:53 PM
–

With things they enjoyed doing? Like threesomes/group stuff i can see being into that at one point and then no longer wanting to share your partner with others. But it’s hard for me to understand how someone will willingly condemn themselves to an unsatisfactory sex life for a partner who - per this thread - they aren’t really into. Part of it seems like it’s reinforcing the “sex as a treat” trope. Like the woman did those things for those guys not for herself, but because they somehow “earned” …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 05:23 PM
–

So she said it was something she enjoyed but didn’t want to do it with you? What was the reasoning?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 03:52 PM
–

I find it hard to believe someone would willingly talk about doing those things with a past partners and then say “nope” without explanation to the current partner. I’m not saying it did not happen. But I’m curious as to how things proceeded after? Did she explain her reasoning? Say it wasn’t something she liked?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/03/26 02:45 PM
2

She can what? Sleep with every guy that’s interested????
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/26 08:51 AM
1

Yeah it’s not like a woman can have sex with EVERY guy that is willing.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/26 04:44 PM
10

For the limited causal sex I’ve had, it generally wasn’t because the guy super hot. It was because I already decided I wanted to have sex and the guy made me laugh or was a good conversationalist.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/26 08:35 PM
1

Don’t men want a sexually ambitious and open woman who only behaves that way for him though?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 11:05 PM
1

Do you think that actually happens a lot? Like be realistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 05:19 PM
1

Why would I care if some random online judged me? I would be loud and proud. Some people don’t make as much money it happens. Someone that 30+ who makes half of what I do and lives in the city probably has different life goals. I’ve tried to make it work several times. Honestly, being a gold digger would have probably saved me a lot of time and energy. Instead I liked men who couldn’t handle a woman who made more, or who was more educated. Why take the risk again especially when it nearly turned…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 01:11 AM
1

Okay now I think you’re just trolling or someone really hurt you. I never said anything anywhere near that. How much money do you think I’m considering as not enough?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:55 AM
1

How am I not attracted to men with lower income than men when I literally came to this conclusion by dating multiple men with lower income than me? No, they aren’t bad people initially. One in particular turned into a bad person when he got upset at me for going to grad school though. I’m not generalizing. I am saying I’ve done it and the juice hasn’t ever been worth the squeeze.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:34 AM
2

Yeah, women move faster than men, that’s the thing. Just like gay couples, who don’t get married as much as any other demographic, have the lowest divorce rates. But they also aren’t getting married as often. Having two partners that are more likely to actually file for divorce would make it more likely that they will divorce. They do need to slow down and consider things more before marriage. When there’s two men, marriage is les likely to begin with. When there’s two women, divorce is more lik…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:33 AM
4

Men don’t put in the effort to even file for the divorce in most cases. He lets the woman do it. Just because someone field for the divorce doesn’t mean they are the ones that are causing it. And honestly? If after 8 years you’re still having break-up level disputes maybe you should split up. Kids do not do well in toxic environments: your parents constantly fighting and belittling or otherwise just being unpleasant to one another is not good. Most divorces aren’t happening because a woman is un…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:26 AM
2

Men are not less likely to cause friction, they are more likely to withdraw and avoid situations that require direct communication and change.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:07 AM
1

What am I asking for that makes me seem like a gold digger? Especially if I’m willing to date men that make less than me. Im willing to pay if a man can’t afford something, If a man moved into my home that I owned I wouldn’t expect him to contribute toward the mortgage for a home he has no equity in. I just have had bad experiences with men that make less than me. They get petty at best and scary and mean at worse. I’m not saying this is how all men that make significantly less than man act, but…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/26 12:01 AM
1

If she has that much trauma wouldn’t you know before you got into a serious relationship with her? And can I ask how much trauma from past relationships you have? Trust me, a 22 year old is not about to settle for some random guy just because, it would be because she genuinely liked the man. What does accountability look like here to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 11:26 PM
3

How? Both of those things cannot be true. If women’s feeling are so fleeting then wouldn’t the time between marriage and divorce be faster? Especially since women are the ones filing. They are lasting 8-12 years on average, because by your logic, women want them to last that long.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 11:25 PM
0

I mean I think if women initiate most divorces the marriages staying for as long as they do are because the women are staying and trying to make it work for as long as they can stand it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 11:07 PM
1

No, it’s because I’ve dated more than a few men that made significantly (keyword) less than me and they always turned it into a problem. Low income is a different story. Theres no reason someone my age, in the city I’m in should be making less than 80k, there’s absolutely no reason for that. If he is, there’s likely a huge split between him and I socially, educationally, and economically. If a man in his 30s is actually low income for his area then he should not be dating. Same with a woman too.…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 11:03 PM
6

I’m saying that men would rather be miserable, sometimes, mean, angry and cheating rather than admit they made a wrong decision. Your vows mean nothing if you hate being with your spouse. Feelings don’t change like the wind. But actions do. The average marriage length prior to divorce in the US is 8-12 years. The median length for all first marriages is 21 years. That’s not changing like the wind that’s giving it time to actually be fixed.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 10:17 PM
1

No, I’ll date men that make less, just won’t date someone where the difference is over 15K. I don’t mind 50/50 with my established partner. I don’t mind paying for my partner to do things if he can’t afford it. I’ve dated guys that make less than me so I’m speaking from experience, it’s not a good situation, especially if the man has some internal conflicts with himself: For example. I like going out to dinner at nice restaurants. I treat myself, go with friends. And if I’ll take my partner. Thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 10:05 PM
16

This! Straight men here see relationship success as just staying in the relationship. They’d rather two people hate one another and do their duty in a relationship. But I think the lesbian divorce rates show one thing: women aren’t divorcing men for their money. They are getting divorced even when they marry women: women just won’t stay somewhere they are unhappy
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 08:36 PM
1

I think you just need some meds, a good group of friends and a social life, but sure I guess!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 08:02 PM
1

…okay? Find a different woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:54 PM
1

How do you know this?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:34 PM
1

Yeah you’re dealing with Gen Z women. Someone of them are horrible about it. Like if you’re 5’0 even you don’t need a 6 foot boyfriend. They do need to get more realistic about the height issue. They do seem to fetishize it almost. But trust me dude, you can get past this! There is a nice woman out there for you!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:28 PM
1

We do live in a very large city. Theres a shoe for every foot here. And he’s an actually fun guy. Like some short guys show you they are short and feel bad about it. Talking to him, you really don’t notice how short he is. He is very well-off, but so is my friend. They also met at an event where her husband was completely in his element. He’s just that guy who happens to be short, he’s not a short guy. That make sense? There’s hope!
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:22 PM
1

No, but he sure did. The second he got one woman he realized he could just go get another one. And she stayed with him. They are having their first baby. Not my business though.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:15 PM
1

If we are at the point where I’m reviewing how he’s interacting to unemployment it’s too late: I’m already well within the zone of danger I was trying to protect myself from in the first place. For me, the juice has never, ever been worth the squeeze. Generally, if a man makes less than me, he is also much less educated. As I stated to someone else, I’ve had better luck with resident doctors or lawyers or PhDs: they just don’t balk as quickly as the others do. Yes, I’ve still run into one or two…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:14 PM
1

I get that. I also think it’s a bit different for men at times. I’ve had guys change up mid date when they finally asked me to explain what I did. Instead of just having the industry I work in. How they respond to it is a clear indicator. But ive found that too often I can’t pick “similar education but lower income”. If I meeting a guy that makes that much less than me both are usually lower. And maybe that’s why things turn difficult. I do agree that education is a good metric. I’ve had more lu…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 07:06 PM
0

Would you not date someone based on them wearing one color or the other? If no then I don’t get how they are analogous. Listen you just seem like a sad kid with a lot of trauma. And you’re setting yourself up to be a bad partner for anyone, emotionally. This is just based on how we’ve interacted here, maybe you’re different in person, it’s unlikely though. Your first gut instinct was to insult anyone that attempted to converse with you. I even approached nicely and you were flat out rude. So I b…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:38 PM
1

If it’s hard to describe the value then it’s likely because there isn’t really one. You might care, but it’s not for a reason. Because I asked you about a situation where you met a woman and your first instinct was to reject her, after bemoaning women rejecting you. I’ve got no problem with you having preferences, but they need to be based in fact if you’re going to claim that they impact the morals and worthiness of another person. 4/5 would not be a problem - so it’s likely not actually tied t…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:18 PM
1

I lost a lot weight and I think my body looks funny unclothed. I think my low sex drive will inhibit me from forming a connection long term.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:09 PM
2

Yes jealously and being unfulfilled are still issues I’d want to avoid in any partner. In my experience those have come out faster when I date men that make significantly less than men. The problems are not secondary to income when your partner is a man having to deal with dating a high earning woman. They are correlated then. It’s not like I make 60k and I’m saying I won’t date a man that makes 55k. The differences here, in my experience, seem to make some men actually feel worse because it’s s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:05 PM
2

Get the maid now! My apartment just started offering us credits because they partnered with a company and it’s amazing. I just get a once a month deep clean for my bathroom and they sweep and do my baseboards. Even though it’s once a month it’s so nice. Most of my friends couple issues come from money or housework. And none of them are struggling so I don’t own why the house keeping service isn’t the obvious move. A friend of mine recently had a baby and a service coming in to clean once a week …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 06:00 PM
2

I don’t think it is. Income is a huge relationship pressure point.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:57 PM
1

I understand what you’re trying to say. How your are conveying it is undermining any point you already don’t have though. Not once have you said you value sex as an intimate connection between two people and think that it should be done sparringly. You insulted people who do have sex in a way you don’t like. Not once have you been able to articulate what moral failing you think people that sleep around have. Even in your friend’s example: she’s not a bad girlfriend because she slept with a lot o…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:56 PM
2

But this isn’t the only metric I use. Just one of them.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:48 PM
1

From what you’re saying it sounds like they don’t really like their partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:47 PM
1

The flaw was that she’s slept with the whole town but not with you. No I’ll tell you what I give to people that know me. I could every penis I’ve seen or touched in any way shape for form, regardless if there was any penetration. It’s less than 10.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:46 PM
1

The first sentence was pointing out the flaw in your argument. Do you think I’ve slept with hundreds of thousands of men or two? The answer might surprise you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:42 PM
2

I know there are men out there that don’t care but I think those are the minority. I explained to someone else here, I once had a partner ask me not to go to nice restaurants. Not just because he couldn’t afford them, but because he didn’t want me to pay for them. I’m fine treating my partner. Especially if it’s to bring him into things I enjoy: I want to do those things with him. This man wanted me to give those things up until he was able to provide them himself. He got angry that I didn’t cal…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:41 PM
1

You can stay the night at each others houses. I’ve spent weekends/weeks at partners places. You learn how they live over time. There are very few things a man could do to make me not want to live with him. Of those hygiene based things, those are all very clear pretty early on once you’ve visited their space. For non hygiene things, they are easy to see once you’ve spent any extended amount of time with other person after you’re comfortable with one another. Cleanliness issues? Easy fix: hire so…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:32 PM
1

I’m not asking you to be interested in some cheap hookup Piterson! I am asking you to just go on a date if you’re given the option. You’re not obligated to marry her, fuck her, he’ll I’m not even asking you to pay for the date. I am asking you to go on the date, get your own dating experience, so that you don’t have to use your friends dating lives as an example. Ideally, you wouldn’t even ask because your answer is going to be zero, mind you. I’m asking you to get to know people for who they sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:28 PM
2

Do they like their partners? Genuine question, I’d buy my guy stuff even if he made 3x what I did. Because it’s about the thought and knowing someone cares about you. But also, it’s likely that they bought nice things BEFORE meeting those guys. My other rule is that dating you can’t force me to change my lifestyle for the worse. You can improve it. You can leave it the same. But the person I’m dating shouldn’t expect me to change what I do for fun. You can’t afford a nice dinner at this place I …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:19 PM
2

I think it’s most fair! Because you’d pay your mortgage no matter what and you’re getting all the equity from it. Even if you married that woman, because you bought it before being married it’s unlikely to be considered marital property. It would always ONLY be yours. (barring some very specific circumstances) And I’d do the same for a man moving into a home I owned. As for your first point, yes a 30k+ difference feels bigger because it’s likely means a significant dip in social economic status …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:14 PM
1

If she was easy then you wouldn’t be sexless in the first place right? Like I’m not even being snarky here. I said 4 people at 22 is a normal amount? I’d be more worried about frequency over quantity there though. But how is she someone that the whole neighborhood has had? Is this how you regularly talk about women?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:08 PM
1

lol I’m in my 30s dude. I’m just trying to make it so you see how broken your mindset is. Of course you’re depressed and sad with an outlook like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:04 PM
1

Yeah, most positive is it not changing anything about the dynamic we had before. The only time I think it’s appropriate to do an inequitable financial split is when one party is moving into the home OWNED by the other party. I don’t think it’s fair to pay mortgage for a house you don’t and possibly will never owned. so if my boyfriend owns a condo and asks me to move in, I would not be okay paying any of the mortgage. But I would pay for utilities and groceries and such.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 05:03 PM
1

Because your perspective isn’t realistic at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:58 PM
1

And sleeping around shows she has a lack of what? Again, Im trying to get to the heart of your argument here. You don’t want a woman that’s had multiple partners because it shows she is what? Untrustworthy? Well if she’s cheating on you, then you shouldn’t definitely leave. Disrespectful? I think you’d be able to tell that before you started dating her?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:56 PM
1

It’s not the same because you’re not going to deem someone an unworthy partner for wearing red over blue. Your examples just show more and more how inexperienced with dating you are. How would any of these things happen ? And what does it have to do with how many partners he had before? It’s unlikely that I’d pick the same song as any other woman. I feel like that would say more about the women he’s marrying than him.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:54 PM
1

You’ve never not once explained why. You’ve given a lot of buzzwords. A lot of feelings. But you’ve not once articulated why or what you think changes in a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:46 PM
1

How is it actively harming me? I’ve been on dates and in relationships with men that: Made a lot less Were less educated Or both. Every time it’s caused friction from them. I don’t care about paying or splitting. If I want to do something with you and you can’t afford it, I’ll pay. I think men have too much on their shoulders making themselves worry about being providers, we can both provide.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:45 PM
1

I’m asking you to explain in words because I don’t think you have any. You are parroting people you’ve heard and/or just spitting out internalized nonsense. Why is it something that makes a person less virtuous? Cause and effect not feelings
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:43 PM
1

But I’m not asking you to date Bonnie blue. How can you be this dense? This is an act right? There’s no genuine way this is how you actually are.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:41 PM
6

Nah, it’s my house too, I’ll pay mortgage, bills whatever. If I’m married it’s our money not mine. I won’t ever cohabitate before being engaged. If I did and a man moved into the home I owned, I would not expect him to pay any of my mortgage if we aren’t engaged or married.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:40 PM
1

I’m not saying this is the only means of having insecurity, just one of the metrics I use.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:39 PM
5

Yes. Because if he’s dating a woman who he feels is making him jealous and unfulfilled he can take it out on her. A jealous woman can only do so much…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:36 PM
2

In anywhere but the city I’m in I’d make extremely good money. I have had friends try to match me with men I make solidly more than recently. I’m fine with around 10k difference, but much more than that I’ve noticed some behaviors pop up. Even in just the dating phase. I tend to obfuscate what I do and let men assume based on the industry. When I tell them what my job is, even just the role makes them act weird. Guys in the same socioeconomic and education realm tend to react better.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:35 PM
1

And because you said not getting dates made you want to kill yourself. It’s the second part that’s getting me confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:31 PM
5

No, but I don’t date women so I only talk about my reasoning as it pertains to men. Was there something about my comment you want to discuss?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:24 PM
2

I will never date a man that makes significantly less than me. Not because I see him as a lesser partner, but because the most dangerous thing to a relationship is a jealous or unfulfilled man. And at my age, it’s likely the man has done all he is going to do, and is just set along that path. Choose better this. Women’s intuition that. I’ve had guys on dates change up their attitude so fast it nearly made my head spin. There’s no way to tell how he’s going to react and there’s no real way to eve…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:16 PM
1

Why the fuck do I care? I’m not a fucking child. Who cares if he took all his past partners there. Maybe it’s because he enjoys the fucking restaurant??! I might actually be more insulted if he never took me there. If he finds it special and then finds that he can also find it special with me, then that’s great. That’s not the only thing in our relationship that I find special or romantic. Romance isn’t about doing shit for others that you didn’t do for anyone else. It’s about making your partne…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 04:01 PM
2

The options are not virgin incel or “chad”. The men that told you that were lying to you. They are dating the women they are telling the men to avoid. While subsequently teaching those same men behaviors that will inhibit them from ever getting partners. If a woman shows interest in you, unless you’re a millionaire, assume that she likes you and go on the fucking date. Why do you think she’d be a bad partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 03:53 PM
1

You’re literally talking about killing yourself because you can’t get a date. Yes, that’s being desperate for pussy. As someone that had an immutable trait that according to this sub makes her extremely undesirable across the dating realm AND was fat on top of that. I completely understand being ignored. Not ignored by guys I wanted, but ignored by all men. I get it: wanting a partner is intrinsic. I don’t blame you for feeling sad about being alone. I blame you for making assumptions about othe…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 03:43 PM
1

Again, you are not explaining why. How does consensual sex devalue people? How does consensual sex make someone less of a worthy partner. What you are saying is that women should be choosy with who they have sex with because you see it akin to being shit on though. But you’re also angry at them for being choosy and thus leaving you a virgin. I’m not using it as an insult, I’m using your words right back at you! We are here because YOU said being short made you a less worthy partner in the eyes o…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 03:35 PM
1

And I’ve asked you WHY several times. I don’t want your feelings. I want why. What does someone having however many partners is your line, say about them? And then what separates that from having one less or one more? I bet you, no matter what you say, it will in the end distill down to something that’s not about how many partners someone has had before. And is instead about an observable quality. You’re a choosy ass beggar who is belittling women foe doing the exact same shit you’d do if you ha…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 03:02 PM
-2

Men don’t actually value that though: that’s why they’ll still cheat on the doting housewife who does all those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 02:04 PM
1

What’s the difference between 4 and 5 morally for you? You’re 22, Gen Z, and likely American. I’ve got some bad news for you. Dating takes time and work. People date around - get over it. If a woman wants to date you then you should date her. You’re not religious. Per you, you’re not conventionally attractive. If you meet a 20-something that wants to date you, you should go on a date with her. She can get someone hotter. I need to study the grifter that convinced men your age to NOT date sexuall…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:53 PM
1

Okay, so - you wouldn’t date a 22 year old woman, fresh out of college - who had 4 partners? But you’re also saying being alone and dateless is so bad that you want to off yourself? That woman is probably not ugly (ugly girls don’t get attention in college either) she’s probably sociable and fun. And unless you’ve heard of her somehow, she’s probably actually pretty picky about who she sleeps with, because let me tell you - 4 at 22 is easy for an average girl in college. That’s one new partner a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:28 PM
3

This skincare thing is common too. I’ve shown many a man in their 30s the joys of a good moisturizing regiment. Essentially, you want it to look like you take care of yourself - if you feel that you aren’t attractive, I’ve found it works to at least still look like you take pride in your appearance. You’re young, so it’s easier. Do skincare daily, just face wash and moisturize at least once a day. Make sure you’re keeping up with hygiene, smell nice, but not overpowering. You don’t have to wear …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:23 PM
2

Before I continue. How old are you? And are you religious?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:17 PM
6

You’re a normal looking kid. Do some skincare regularly, maybe lose the goatee and grow a whole beard or just get rid of it completely. But you’re way too self-conscious while being kinda mean and petty. It’s not a good look. I know guys that look genuinely unfortunate, in my opinion, that have girlfriends. The trick? They are nice, fun to be around and don’t make women around them feel bad because of things other people did.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:17 PM
2

Listen, I’m a woman who is on the other end of the attentiveness scale due to a certain physical attribute we can’t talk about here. I understand being discounted as unattractive just because of a physical trait you can’t change and that doesn’t say a thing about your ability as a romantic partner. I understand why some men get to 30 and are still virgins. I understand why they are upset about it. This man is making so close to making me not care anymore. Like you gotta take what you have and do…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:10 PM
3

It wouldn’t be a woman your age. I’m assuming you’re in your late teens/early 20s now. In your plan, any realistic means of it would not be attainable for you until you’re near 30. And again, I don’t believe any of this. But you’re telling me that if you met a woman actually liked you but had 20+ past partners and now you’re near 30 if not into your 30s (not sure how you’d even find that out and still get her as an option to date mind you) you’d lose attraction to the ONLY woman that’s shown act…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 01:02 PM
5

Can you answer the question?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 12:49 PM
4

So let me get this straight - And mind you, I don’t believe or subscribe to any of this. I’m just using your logic: A short man can’t overcome the issues of being short in order to attract women. If he doesn’t overcome that issue and any others, he will likely never have any interactions romantically with women. If he overcomes some of those shortcomings he may be able to attract some women. But you think that this man wouldn’t want those women because “they had their fun and now want to settle …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/26 12:32 PM
–

Thank you! More to go but I’m at the part where other people see the difference!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 06:36 PM
–

I honestly think that’s where a lot of the resentment from men comes from. In their minds, they are always reaching for women they deem as “below their league” and extrapolate that all women think they deserve the best. Really, it’s just that the particular man is not appealing romantically.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 06:31 PM
–

I’m mostly saying that men who claim they are unviable to women are probably only invisible to the women they are personally already attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 06:20 PM
–

Yeah, I’m getting a lot of men just being nicer in everyday life. Opening doors even though I’m far far being them. Holding the elevator. Offering to help me carry stuff. When previously these things were only done of it were actually convenient. Like a guy held a full elevator for me and I was so far away.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 06:19 PM
–

How men treat a woman after she looses weight is honestly such a turnoff. It’s night and day and kinda shows that men actually don’t pay attention or notice women they aren’t attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 06:05 PM
1

Lust is not a cheating instinct. People are not being driven to cheat by some internal force. They are making the decision to cheat, it is a purposeful and done with intent. No one is overcome by so much desire that they can’t stop and think about how having sex with a person that’s not their partner might not be the best idea. “Oops I didn’t mean to kiss her.” “Oh shoot I was so horny I just let him take my clothes off.” Just consider if your partner blamed cheating on instinct?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:13 PM
1

Is this post not about how men shouldn’t expect women to be okay with them cheating, or am I confused on the title? And no, theres no random force driving people to cheat. It’s lust and selfishness at best. At worst it’s spite and power. It’s extremely easy to not cheat.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 10:21 PM
2

Jaded people don’t just get better once they got a date. I went out with a nice guy who was so far from my type, but we had a nice chat so I figured “why not”. we lasted like 15 minutes before he started going on about how he was surprised I agreed to go out with him. And when I insisted that I’d been excited for the date, he started talking about how he wouldn’t pay for me because he’d been duped by gold diggers before. This man was a receptionist at a car dealership?? What gold???!! And then h…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 01:43 AM
1

This entire post is about women expected to be okay with men cheating. There would have to be a driving force for men to want to cheat if the argument is that it’s “natural”?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/26 09:34 PM
1

That doesn’t mean he’s sleeping with someone that will ensure he has a child. It actually makes it less likely in modern times. Plus if your argument is that men only want to impregnate women and not be dads. Then it leads to the argument that women are far more important than men on a societal standpoint. You aren’t needed past conception. And again, if the woman is sleeping with a man she doesn’t like or know, the man has done nothing to earn it. Scientifically, a penis doesn’t know if the wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/26 07:53 PM
0

But the man is okay impregnating a random woman that he does like very much? And if she doesn’t like him very much, how is it an achievement for a man? What did he have to do?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/26 04:21 PM
3

Cheating and promiscuity are not the same. If someone has many consenting adult partners and is being safe, it doesn’t actually hurt anyone. If someone is cheating, that hurts someone and shows the cheating partner doesn’t really care about their relationship, feelings, or maintaining trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/26 04:20 PM
5

How can you say someone is really interested in you if they don’t even make the effort to make themselves look good for you. These same men they would be “happy” with lukewarm effort will also be complaining about losing interest in their partner 5 years down the line.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/26 01:48 AM
–

No, I’m saying the men bemoaning the lack of accountability, whatever that means, are the ones they should not be dating. They would blame a woman who dated anyone, no matter the type of man, and say maybe it’s her that’s the issue. It doesn’t matter what kind of guy she’s with. They just want women to have zero standards and expectations, and be happy with…whatever’s
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 08:10 PM
1

Most people do. Because if they want their spouse to have certain benefits should anything happen, they’ll have to fill out MORE paperwork than a marriage certificate. Marriage has fast track certain things and makes rhetorical assumption that the spouse has certain privileges.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 01:52 AM
9

At the end of the day, most of the red pill men here want to shave off women’s reason for not dating them. First it’s: “It’s my fault for dating bad men. Let me choose better.” Then if those men still treat that woman badly it’s : “The type of man I’m looking for doesn’t have to treat me well because he has options, let me choose better” Then: “Let me date a different type of man.” (Usually someone not conventionally attractive.) If this man also doesn’t work out, she takes accountability by goi…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/02/26 01:49 AM
4

And on the off chance they do it’s called OCD.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/02/26 02:23 PM
3

It seems like you’re trying to make it a problem. This is the kind of action that actually ruins relationships: you’re telegraphing a lot of assumptions right now - all onto a stranger you don’t really know. If you had the same mindset in your interpersonal life, then it’s clear to see why you’re so wary of baggage.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/26 09:00 PM
3

Is this how you approach relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 10:05 PM
8

It’s because the terms are based in misogyny. They can never be applied evenly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 09:52 PM
3

So she’s bad if she had a good time or a bad time lol!??
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 09:51 PM
7

I feel like sleeping with multiple men INSIDE a marriage would be worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 09:50 PM
3

The gender that want sex the most is also the gender that villainizes female sexuality the most. The juice is just not worth the squeeze for women to risk it with, honestly, most men. Women no longer NEED a man to survive for them it part. So now men have to be able to provide something to her life to get access to women. There’s a woman out there for most of you. She’s just probably not someone you’d consider. And let’s say your theory is true: men are the majority of law makers across the worl…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/02/26 12:01 AM
2

So are you saying you asked a hypothetical question originally? I think you read the last paragraph and assumed a lot from there and are now trying to save face.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/26 04:50 PM
3

I don’t think you read my response at all. Can you point to a particular paragraph or statement, or are you just assuming I’m saying something you disagree with ?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/26 04:45 PM
3

What part of what I wrote prompted this response?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/26 04:42 PM
8

This is a terrible idea. Most women are not buying new outfits, makeup, perfume, etc etc for every first date. A few MIGHT get their hair done for a first date, but I think that’s also not the norm. A woman might have an expensive bottle of perfume she uses for dates, it’s unlikely she bought it specifically for that date. The amount of money spent on date prep is low in respect to the amount of TIME women tend to put in. I do think women tend to put more time into making themselves look good an…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/26 03:37 PM
5

What the fuck is this comment???
/r/PurplePillDebate04/02/26 01:06 PM
2

If he’s getting laid despite living at home it’s probably because he’s hot and that above average.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 05:05 PM
2

Is 6/10 not above average????
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 04:20 PM
4

Most men cannot afford to have a live-in girlfriend/spouse that does not contribute to the household. Even for dating, most men are not paying for every single date for the entirety of the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:21 PM
1

Who cares??? Men want women to want them just because they are average and an okay choice, why can’t she enjoy having sex with someone above average?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/01/26 03:11 PM
–

Why would anybody agree to that? Like what benefit does it give the woman in this case?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 08:21 PM
–

No one has asked me for this. I just see it on apps in bios. If the word casual leaves a guys lips I’m already done lol, this consistent nonsense sounds like bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 07:55 PM
–

Oh no I would never consider anything casual. But I see a lot of men asking for it on the apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 07:46 PM
–

I don’t understand how anything casual can have any degree of commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 07:41 PM
–

How is that different than just saying casual?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 07:24 PM
–

Q4M: What does consistent and casual even mean? What do you actually want when you say that?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/26 07:18 PM
0

Why do you think being penetrated is submissive? Is going down on your partner also submissive?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:51 PM
–

Saying that women have not show interest directly means that men have to make things aggressively flirty in order to show interest. I understand men wan to signal clear interest: but there’s a much more tactful way to do it, and if she doesn’t respond the way they want? It doesn’t mean there’s zero interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:38 PM
–

Dude I’m 30. Most of us are not wasting time going on dates with men we have zero interest in; it’s a waste of time. I’m not getting upset and ending the convo, the man is getting upset when I steer things away from flirty banter or if I flirt back he assumes I want to fuck him right away.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:22 PM
–

Okay but I’ve explained several times there’s no way to tone down the flirting without making the guy think you’re not actually into him. If you flirt back it could make him think you want to get into bed quickly. My issue is that the man makes it a problem I have to solve, instead of just waiting for me to initiate the flirting.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:21 PM
–

Yeah, I don’t match with guys I’m not attracted to. But my main issue is there is no way to halt “flirty banter” without seeming disinterested. Like I can’t say that I don’t want to keep them warm, and any further convo about keeping them warm makes it seem like you’re just looking to fuck. There’s no way out!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:19 PM
–

Sex early is casual sex though, unless you also define the relationship early. But also, I was talking to this man for literally five minutes! You don’t need to prove you want to have sex with me, I assume that’s part of the reason we matched.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:15 PM
–

This was on bumble! To even start the convo I have to reach out first. This is just an excuse for bad behavior!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 09:08 PM
–

No, I don’t do casual sex. And i state very plainly that I’m looking for a serious relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:59 PM
–

If I don’t know you why would I respond well to someone asking me to keep them warm. I matched with you on a dating app and am engaging in conversation with you: obviously I’m interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:58 PM
1

You did though, you said if the partner being penetrated is the active partner is still submissive. I am asking what about penetration makes you think it’s submissive.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:40 PM
–

Well I’m not! I don’t know these men. I always have zero clue how to reply that doesn’t make it seem like I want to carry on with that tone, or make it seem like I’m totally uninterested in them. No, random guy, I don’t want to keep you warm and I have no idea how to communicate that without sounding rude.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:31 PM
–

But it’s silly especially when I just met this person. Why would you assume I’m okay talking about sex with you five minutes in?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:26 PM
1

So being the; Active partner is not by itself submissive. Then what about penetration makes it submissive. You’re saying it is, I’m disagreeing.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:25 PM
–

No. Guys on dating apps I’m trying to get to know.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:24 PM
–

I’m not communicating any hints though. I am genuinely inquiring about his day. I am very direct? If I want sexual and flirty I’ll make it sexual and flirty so he doesn’t have to guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:24 PM
1

No no, guys on dating apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 08:23 PM
–

I feel like it ridiculous how careful you have to be as a woman in order to not “mislead” a guy into thinking a conversation is sexual. For example: “Hey you staying warm in this snow storm?” Could be misconstrued by some as sexual versus “hey you staying out of the cold today?” Is not.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 07:41 PM
1

Well because you said being the “active partner is not the end all be all”, when it comes to whether or not the act is submissive. If it’s not about who is the active partner, then it has to be about who is the receiving partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 07:24 PM
1

wait weren’t you the one saying that penetration is submissive?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 07:21 PM
2

How is penetration the end all be all?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 07:15 PM
9

Ive had sex with men I thought were okay in the face but hot all-around because they had great personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/26 07:05 PM
3

I also feel like the number system is silly, ive beer dated a guy I thought was average looking. He may have been “average” by whatever standards but he was hot to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:53 PM
4

Yeah but saying she’s a 5 is crazy. It’s also why I don’t like those number systems. I think whoever I date is hot..he doesn’t have to be hot compared to everyone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:43 PM
–

Probably Average or slightly below because I’m a losing weight still! But I don’t think I’m ugly and I clean up nice!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:42 PM
–

Yeah! He’s like 5’7, with an okay jawline, early stage dad-bod and slightly thinning/receding hair line. Average is not ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:36 PM
–

Being rude to anyone. Especially service workers. Pet names when we just met. Making everything about sex. Any use of the words “tantric” or “yoni”
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:32 PM
–

Someone called Sabrina carpenter a “5” and I’m starting to think maybe men don’t know what an average woman looks like.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/26 10:29 PM
1

And that was after the arcade/candle making/ dinner? I just think it was so rude of her to not leave or cancel before hand instead of making you waste time and money.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 07:20 PM
2

My dad only has girls and I would consider not taking my husbands name, and instead hyphenating so that my dads name can go on.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 07:15 PM
1

Why did you continue the date?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/26 06:39 PM
–

It’s because women only spaces usually don’t involve men being the majority of entertainment or staff.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/26 09:01 PM
2

Was the woman also in her 30s? That’s crazy for a 30 something to say that after a few dates based on the activity you guys did. She was checked out the entire time and not engaging??
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 08:33 PM
2

Here’s the thing though; men do the exact same thing. Men will go out of their way to do things they wouldn’t normally do for a woman they actually like. What men here ignore is that figuring out you actually like someone usually takes a little bit of time. A man that’s frugal or a homebody or who usually doesn’t put much effort into dating might find himself doing more when he meets a woman he likes. I think men here shoot themselves in the foot by trying to force themselves to date women they …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 03:10 PM
6

All men! Doesn’t matter how hot they are. That’s why I know it’s not worth jumping into bed right away.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 06:01 AM
4

Making the first move is not on par with jumping into bed with someone you don’t know.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 01:31 AM
2

Go down fighting…the women that would sleep with you???
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 01:30 AM
8

Sex is so vulnerable. It’s not something I’ve ever done without a massive amount of retrospection before, during and after. What if he doesn’t like the way my body looks? What if he wasn’t actually looking for something long term? What if he doesn’t have good intentions? I feel like men forget that relationship sex should have some aspect of trust in it.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 01:24 AM
10

For me it depends. I don’t go out with guys I’m not attracted to. And it depends on how we are clicking. I’m very upfront about my sexual hangups and essentially go from there: Is he still attentive? Is he treating me like someone he actually likes and enjoys spending time with? Do we have good conversation? Eventually we do other stuff. I try really hard to let a guy know that I am interested. But intimacy can take many forms and I try to Incorporate other means.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 01:19 AM
1

Women like men, are not monoliths. I’ve never had a man ask me about my past sex partners. Maybe sex life snd sex acts but outside of the internet I’d never come across a man that actually asked how fast I’d slept with someone prior to meeting him.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 01:06 AM
1

I mean I know plenty of women that have. Lots of people are consistent with their criteria. But for the ones that don’t, then they should be upfront about it and let the person they are seeing decide what they want to deal with. I don’t jump into bed with men right away. I do let them know that I won’t have sex with them unless I am the only woman they are having sex with, and if I feel like he’s not treating me as an option. They deal with it or they don’t. If I feel like they aren’t giving me …
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 12:10 AM
4

Then that’s personal and not something he’s considering for all future partners. I don’t see that as the same at all. Him paying for women in the past is not the same as him specially saying he’s not paying for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 12:06 AM
6

It would depend on if he is doing it specifically with her while at the same time doing something different with another woman. If he just, in the past, didn’t go 50/50 and has since changed for whatever reason, I see it different. But if he’s just picking one woman in particular to treat differently that could indicate a problem. I think men take the sex thing as a personal slight. Like she is choosing JUST you, out of all the men showing interest in her, to not sleep with.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/26 12:02 AM
8

? Do you like women as people?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 11:59 PM
14

But is the only way to show desire by quickly having sex with you? What if they do desire you, they just need to get to know you to be okay with the vulnerability they sex entails?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 11:58 PM
1

This is exactly why some women are against age gap relationship: men are dating those women banking on the inexperience and ease. Not because they have more in common or actually like them more: those women are just more likely to sleep with them faster. Perhaps you saw that the initial time and effort you weee spending tended not to get you anywhere. So you’d rather do something else where you can actually get to know the person. But I don’t think you are doing it as a persona slight against th…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 02:52 PM
2

It’s not unfair, things are different, people change a lot over the years. Someone making the same actions and decisions at 30 as they did at 20 would be very worrisome. It’s normal for people to be growing and learning at that age. That’s like if a woman you met found out you used to treat every woman you went in fist dates with to super nice and expensive dinners, then you stopped because you realized it didn’t do anything except stress you out and add to an already anxiety inducing situation.…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 01:55 PM
1

So for this first part: whars different between you and those guys: everything. We aren’t going out on the same day. We aren’t going out to the same restaurant. You aren’t the same person. The woman isn’t the same person. Especially with years in between actions. So, let’s say this: you meet a woman, find out she had sex quick in the past, yet she says she never enjoyed it. Just did it to keep the guy. She says she’s willing to have sex with you to keep you around, but she probably won’t enjoy i…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 01:31 PM
0

The behaviors may be recent. Like you’re talking to a 20 year old who hooked up with someone fast like six months ago. Versus a 30 year old who did it like 8 years ago. As for the second part: that goes into what I said: if you enjoy spending time with her, feel there’s mutual attraction and mutual interest then discounting her completely, without any conversation just seems silly. But that’s also probably the reaction from lack of relationship and dating experience: I did the same thing. You ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 12:46 PM
4

You’re just saying comments to negate mine. You can look at these men with domestic abuse charges: just go browse the prisoner list on your local jail/prison page. Those men are NOT attractive in general. At all.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 12:20 PM
3

as someone that had sex in her past before she felt comfortable with even the idea of sex; I can tell you that yeah, the waiting is so that I can actually enjoy the sex I’m having. I used to center the needs of others completely before my own. It made dating draining, challenging and honesty damaging for me. I had sex before I was even comfortable with the guy and it ruined him and sex for me. Not his fault - he didn’t know. So now, years and years later, I understand that waiting for my own com…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 12:14 PM
1

Women do get abused/mistreated by ugly men. A tale that’s common is a guy getting a confidence boost and cheating or changing how he acts once he lands a girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/26 12:03 PM
–

Why is she single?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 11:04 PM
1

Not really. I’m not really thinking of a specific man. Just a man that in my head I know is attractive??? I don’t really think about it too much.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 06:11 PM
1

My brain. All my fantasies are focused on me and man. I’m not imagining some weird third party having sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 06:03 PM
2

Uhh no. I am super straight. Never kissed another woman, don’t really watch porn. I can acknowledge that a woman is attractive, but I have zero interest in her physically beyond that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 05:56 PM
2

How is this humiliating men? Sleeping with men is not humiliating. If the key driver for male unhappiness is lack of casual sex (I don’t agree with this) then bisexuality could open up more realms for men to have casual sex. Bi men, despite also being attracted to women, just would have another avenue to access casual sex. They would, theoretically, in this world where causal sex is the only issue, have a means of getting what they want. The frustration of being alone/not having any intimacy wou…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 05:53 PM
–

I’m not saying they are being denied sex by women, more so that men could have access to casual sex - if they want it- without “jumping through the hoops” or whatever op said, that comes with dating women. And this is only for men that lament how hard it is for them to have casual sex. I definitely understand that bisexuality, dating and love is much more nuanced than getting your rocks off.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 03:13 PM
4

It’s because sex is riskier for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 04:38 AM
5

Uhh, I think you misread what I wrote,
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 04:37 AM
–

It’s not a fetish, men would be more able to have the causal, quick, no-effort sex they want. Men that sleep with men have the most sex. They could have physical relationships with someone whose Libido matches (if not exceeds) their own. If men’s main issue is not enough access to physical intimacy and the barrier to the intimacy with women, men being bi would fix it,
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/26 02:40 AM
18

Not even gonna lie, men would be happier if they were all bi. It would solve so many problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 11:45 PM
19

I have been saying this for so long. they truly only sex as a thing women give. They don’t see it ad a mutually pleasurable experience for both parties.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 07:29 PM
3

Wait so was the sex toy a weird one? Did she insist on using it?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/26 12:30 AM
2

Was this a woman you’d been on dates with already?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 11:52 PM
2

So this is a problem you’ve never actually come across in real life?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 11:30 PM
2

Okay but what if it’s just a normal little vibe?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 10:43 PM
3

Wait, what kind of toys are women using in your personal experience. And not just from what you’ve seen in porn.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 09:21 PM
9

This is honestly the weirdest take I’ve ever heard. The red pill mind is insanity. I just hope you don’t think like this in real life. It’s basically you think you’re a simp if you strive to have your woman enjoy having sex with you?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 09:09 PM
2

What? I mean no one is stopping you from getting a silicon gf! But women don’t use sex toys to replace men, they use them to get off.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 09:05 PM
–

You do know sex toys can feel good for men too, right? Like you can also enjoy the sex you benefits. That thing is your friend not your enemy. I don’t think your analogy works well
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:55 PM
–

How is using a sex toy with your partner simping?? I swear yall find anything to be mad about .
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:49 PM
–

What does this mean? Care to elaborate?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/01/26 08:41 PM
1

I’m not shifting the blame for anything: the reason women don’t seek out casual sex and generally don’t engage in it with certain men is because women have been taught that sex is bad. They are only taking the risk for a man they find to be worth the risk for whatever reason. Comparing women dating to fucking nazis is honestly so crazy. Me saying men and women that do certain things in hopes of sex or a relationship is stupid is not deflecting. They are doing stupid actions…they need to both be …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 10:50 PM
8

At this point there are thousands of years of damage both men and women would have to unlearn. It also does zero to take away the risk of sex that the woman has. Pregnancy, higher risk of stds, plus, casual sex is just overall less enjoyable for women. It’s why, when women do engage in causal sex, it would be with a more attractive man. You’re raking the risk, but at least he’s pleasant to look at, pleasant to communicate with, and generally fun to be around for the short time the two of you are…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 09:23 PM
1

Some men have made up this fantasy about women and these so called chads. That all women are mad the hot guy didn’t commit after she hooked up with him early. The act happens, but men are forgetting that women are told from very early on they sex with a man does not mean anything. Women know that hot guy probably won’t commit after she sleeps with him, just like men know that it’s unlikely the beautiful woman is going to sleep with him after the spends whatever and does whatever. The women, like…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 08:51 PM
10

You don’t see it as so bad because you just want to have sex. But the feeling of someone saying - I don’t want to spend anytime with you unless you are pleasuring me, is extremely hurtful. Men’s obsession with sex is their own undoing. Slut shaming made women seek out sex at such a low rate compared to men. Men have a biological need to be able to enjoy sex, women do not, over the years, this mindset has made a sort of catch-22 of sex being super important to men, but not as important to women. …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 08:46 PM
8

No, because this doesn’t ever happen. If women could get guys by having sex with them quickly, they would do it. Women get upset that a man they perceived as hot doesn’t want them for the same reasons men get upset a woman they think is hot doesn’t want to sleep with the.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 08:11 PM
17

Because of the risk of pregnancy, disease, damage to reputation etc. it wasn’t too long ago that a woman could be fired from her job if she got pregnant outside of a marriage. And, it’s the underlying feeling that some men genuinely do not see women as full people, they just see them as a means of getting off or continuing their name.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 08:10 PM
3

The assurance part comes from not having casual sex. That’s the whole point. And yes, men do have racial preferences and physical preferences for long term relationships. I know plenty of non-white men who get laid. I also know a ton of those same non-white men who would insult, demean and disrespect women from their backgrounds who slept with them quickly. You’re getting upset because I’m telling the truth: It’s much harder for a woman to get an LTR out of a man than it is for her to have casua…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 04:17 PM
–

Dude, I’m a WOC and men have the same racial preferences. Getting into a relationship is much much harder than getting causal sex out of the man. I’m not lying , or straw manning, men are way more superficial about who they will be in an ltr with versus who they will casually sleep with.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 04:04 PM
25

Then stop buying the lunches. If you already know sex is easily attainable for women, don’t be so desperate for it that you feed (literally and figuratively) the egos of any woman just for the hope of a crumb of pussy. If you’re not getting sex when you buy women things anyway I don’t see why men continue to do it. I actually dislike men that think he can spend his way into my bed: he’s probably done the same for dozens of other women before me. It’s not anything about me that’s making him want …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 03:54 PM
35

Women would be more open to sleeping with men quickly if men respected, or even liked women that sleep with men quickly. Generally, men seem to want to fuck the hoe, disparage the hoe, marry the virgin and then complain the virgin isn’t good or exciting in bed. The “mating dance” has become a necessity to at least attempt the see if the man is in this for you and the physical stuff, or just the physical stuff. Women KNOW men want to sleep with them. Women also know that they will carry any stigm…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 03:46 PM
9

Men would be superficial about the women they would spend time and get to know, thought. It’s not special being chosen by a man for sex…he’d literally fuck any woman that let him.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/01/26 03:45 PM
1

It’s not all bad the extremes, I do tend to get a lot of super Socially conscious guys and a lot of conservative men. Aren’t most people mid?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 03:41 AM
1

This is something I’ve considered a lot. Just like there are more conventionally attractive religious people compared to agnostics or atheists. I think being attractive provides certain innate privileges - life just treats you a little nicer (sometimes not all th time) and if you have an easier time of things, it’s easy to see it as a blessing.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 12:37 AM
1

This is a good idea!!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 12:33 AM
0

No! That’s the weird part. But they are all from Cali or Washington it seems.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 12:31 AM
1

The trad conservatives tend to actually interact with my profile. They usually say something like them bringing out my feminine energy or some nonsense. Mostly they do want to have an actual genuine conversation - I just can’t excuse such differing morals.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 12:30 AM
0

I would agree if not for the attractive conservative men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/01/26 12:28 AM
2

I really wish there was a safe place to post dating profiles. I need to know if I’m ugly, or if my pictures suck. Because there’s no other reason why these dating app matches are so sad. I’m not even looking for 6+ guys only. The only men that match with me are extremely weird vegan environmentalist socialist alt-left bros. Or on the other end, attractive trad-conservatives that I’d never, ever date.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 10:10 PM
1

But why would a single mother date a guy LIVING with his ex spouse
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 01:02 AM
3

He was attractive. But someone has to be almost perfect in every other aspect to make me consider them when they have a kid. No one would ever be hot enough to make me consider dating them when they live with their ex.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 12:56 AM
1

Guess not his place lol
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/26 12:05 AM
1

There was probably drama with him making the bumble profile.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 11:23 PM
4

<image> Ain’t no way someone is single enough to deal with this.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 11:12 PM
1

If you can get casual sex easily you don’t have to work for it. By the fact that it’s casual - no one is confirming your income or job for a one night stand they are only going based on how you look. And if you argue that you have to put work into looking good to attract someone for casual sex, then you have to admit that women do to. The men that are willing to sleep with a woman who looks like a slob or doesn’t take care of herself at all are not top tier men - so if they are getting laid then…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 06:39 PM
2

What? What romance?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 01:55 PM
3

This is wrong - insecure people can be aggressive!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:25 AM
3

Wait…do you think sex is automatically good if a woman is a virgin?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:21 AM
2

Or they know what hurts men’s feelings….
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:11 AM
1

If you have been promiscuous it’s just as easy for you. Women don’t automatically know your network (any one can pretend or lie for a night) at the end of the day, if you can get multiple causal sex partners it’s because you happen upon more people that are attracted to you. The ability to for you to engage in the act, means that it’s easy. Just because you feel that effort you put forth to make you feel good about yourself was a lot, doesn’t matter. If a woman decides to sleep with you quickly,…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 05:03 AM
1

Why? Why do you hate sluts?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/01/26 02:33 AM
10

How can you speed-run comfort? She’s not doing it to reward you. That’s you centering sex around the man. Shes doing it for herself and for her own comfort. It’s not about you.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 03:50 AM
5

Hmm like after a few dates. Mostly? Except for one guy who I was friends with for three years first and we got together after the first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 03:48 AM
13

I think men assume this it’s just a rule. They take it as a woman saying; “whenever we are committed or whenever we reach six months, then I will have sex with him”. But it’s not a definitive rule. You could make a woman feel comfortable before six months, or it could take longer than six months. It’s not a reward, it’s her setting expectations. Consider it less an if/then statement and more of a guideline.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/01/26 02:52 AM
3

No their fantasy is women who have had “too many” previous partners will have sex with them without making them commit or without having any standards, let those men treat them like lesser people and help them attract a woman they can “respect”.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 09:22 PM
4

Whats the base chance of divorce?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/25 09:20 PM
2

No, just because you look more for looks for hookups doesn’t mean when you pick someone for an ltr you didn’t consider looks at all. When you’re booking up with someone - you only care that they are attractive, nothing else matters if you don’t plan on getting to know them past the orgasm. If you’re looking for a ltr, you have to look at other things including looks to assure long term compatibility. You’re arguing that men don’t do this for long term partners. They think looks matter more.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/25 12:51 AM
4

The source you provided basically says “women look for attractiveness more when going to one night stands, men look for attractiveness more for a long term partner”. Just looking at this, I would say that men are more shallow because they look at looks more when dealing with someone they want to have a long term relationship with.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 11:12 PM
1

Yeah but he asked about the second favorite. Most guys usually just have asked for details about the date I mentioned first,
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 10:26 PM
1

No they never asked me what the first favorite was for.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:56 PM
1

The guys have historically asked about details for the date I mentioned lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:39 PM
1

“I’ll wear your favorite later” sounds more sexual to me for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:35 PM
1

I’ve asked favorite color as an opener before and it hardly ever works. Second favorite almost always gets a reply! Usually “wow no one’s ever asked me that” or something
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:34 PM
1

How would you reply to his question?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:28 PM
1

Yeah because I wasn’t looking to jump into bed right away, but was trying to signal that I was interested in him. How would you have replied to his question?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:27 PM
1

Only because I couldn’t think of a reply to his follow-up question. And I recognized that and instead tried to ask him about other things and sort of shrugged off his sexual comments- he made all of them increasingly sexual.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:24 PM
1

I unmatched because I tried to steer convo away from sex and he wouldn’t budge.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:21 PM
2

I know and I said that to someone else earlier. I know sex is a motivator, I don’t want it to be the ONLY motivator. I gave him a lot of chances to move off of sex as a topic. He never did, so I unmatched .
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:20 PM
1

Ahh, don’t most matches from guys on dating apps come from wanting to have sex?? Would you match with someone you didn’t want to have sex with?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:16 PM
1

No!! I would not have matched with him, where did I say that?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:11 PM
1

No - we met on a dating app. Dating includes sex, men aren’t matching for personality on bumble. You’re dating someone because in theory you’d want to have sex with them at some point. To get to that point you have to date. I had zero interest in having sex right away, but asked about the second favorite color to: Get a greater chance at him responding to my opener. And Try to be flirty. I understand why he thought it was sexual, so I asked him to tell me more about himself through follow-up que…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:09 PM
1

Ohhh that’s smart!! I’ll use that!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:05 PM
1

I unmatched when I lead the conversation away from sex twice and he won’t get the hint yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:05 PM
1

Show me flirting that’s not corny!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:04 PM
1

I attempted twice to move the convo away from sex - yes I know he wants to have sex, that why he matched with me - I did not want the main focus of our convo to be about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 09:02 PM
1

I was hoping he would ask about the first date and be excited that I did the heavy lifting of essentially asking him out.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:58 PM
1

I tried to steer it away from sexual convo and he kept bringing it back. So I unmatched. I also never made it sexual for it to be a convo about sex, I asked for a date. Which he never even responded to,
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:56 PM
1

How would you reply to his question?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:54 PM
1

But only because he asked a follow up question that I was not prepared for. Was I supposed to say “I asked about the second favorite because it makes it more likely for you to actually reply?”
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:51 PM
1

When did I say oh really???
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:49 PM
1

I asked him about himself and what he does for work and he said something like “oh my love language is physical touch and I’m really physical and sensual” then I unmatched.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:48 PM
1

Which fair. But I also tried to move it away and he wasn’t moving with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:46 PM
1

How is taking all the pressure off him by asking for a date having no rizz???
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:43 PM
1

Because asking about second has gotten more genuine replies than asking someone what their favorite color was as an opening move.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:42 PM
1

I unmatched because even when I steered the convo away from sex and asked him to tell me more about himself, he turned it right back toward sex. Plus, it’s stupid for people to bring up sex so quickly: women know you matched because you eventually want to have sex. It’s not a secret. I don’t want to date someone where sex is their motivating reason for engaging.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:41 PM
1

No one mentioned underwear. He asked about the second favorite not me. I’m saying what you reply to his follow up?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:29 PM
1

So just ignore it?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:27 PM
0

No, asking about second favorite instead of favorite just gets more responses and an actual answer. How would you reply to his question?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:26 PM
1

How would you have replied after his question?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:23 PM
1

It doesn’t matter! The entire set up is for him to plan the date!! While being curious!!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:17 PM
1

I was talking about going on a date?? Why does that part not carry over?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:13 PM
1

Even with the rest of the conversation before???
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 08:12 PM
1

I’ll try that!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 07:25 PM
1

Like I said! Something else!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 07:23 PM
1

So how would I avoid that in this case?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 07:22 PM
1

Again trying to be flirty, but did it seem like I wanted him to go into full detail about it?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 07:20 PM
1

Was this too flirty? Me: hey! What’s your second favorite color? Him: blue I think. Me: good to know, I’ll wear that for our first date. Him: lol looking forward to it. Why the second favorite and not the favorite? Me: the favorite is for something else. Was that too forward and flirty? He took the convo immediately physical after that I and I unmatched.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/25 07:17 PM
1

I mean if she’s losing weight after attracting a partner it seems like the work is being put in consistently.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 10:26 PM
1

But if she wasn’t losing weight you wouldn’t?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 10:25 PM
0

You guys already have shared interest, you enjoy her company. Maybe weight-wise she came in a little heavy and was getting herself together. Now she’s starting to noticeably lose weight.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 10:06 PM
1

Q4M: if you met a woman initially that wasn’t fully your type, but you figured you’d hangout with her because why not. If she got more fit/better looking in during your time together, would you then be open to dating her seriously?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/25 09:53 PM
2

I play matchmaker if I think my friend would be a good partner for someone. But if they have NOTHING in commons and I know my friend isnt at all attracted to the other, it’s a waste of time. If I have a male friend that’s constantly getting into physical altercations, he won’t be a friend for long anyway. I’ve never had a guy get into a physical fight for me…no one’s had to punch anyone. No one’s ever gotten jumped. Why am I friends with someone who gets jumped? Now if someone tried to randomly …
/r/PurplePillDebate11/12/25 01:15 AM
2

I think those women are hypocrites if they think that and have/seek out casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 11:27 PM
1

I’m mostly talking about how men on this sub discuss sex. Like it seems like at times they are disgusted by the person but can’t help but want the act.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 05:30 PM
1

A lot of men talk about sex like it’s the most degrading thing ever then wonder why women aren’t rushing to have it with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 05:25 PM
4

Do you really think men are going to want to raise kids on their own? Artificial insemination is easily accessible. Women who want kids have a variety of ways of having them if they don’t have a partner. Men have a couple of ways too. I don’t think they will be rushing to care for a new born alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/12/25 05:25 PM
1

But you can see how the thought that you sleeping with someone lowers their value yet you continue to sleep with them is hypocritical. It’s hypocritical, no matter how much you try to rationalize it, it is. The ick is not because she has sex; In this case you don’t really think sex makes you a worse partner on any moral, physical or emotional level. You are attributing her having sex with people - not you - to her being a bad partner for you…but for no discernible reason. It would be different i…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 11:11 PM
2

Honest question, how much did you think about cheating the first time?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 06:18 PM
1

It’s still hypocritical. If you think too much physical intimacy with other people ruins someone for relationships, why would you be willing to do that to another person (who you have no intention of dating) and yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 04:51 PM
–

Why does he get the ick from dating her? Why is he wiling to engage physically if too much physical intimacy gives him the ick.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 03:26 PM
3

The key words here are “when he otherwise would”, if his only reason for not seeking a relationship with her is the number of previous partners she’s had, and he’s still willing to sleep with her, then he is shaming the behavior while also participating in it, this is hypocritical. She’s not owed a relationship, neither is he. But if he’d otherwise date her, and is still willing to sleep with her, he’s a hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 03:24 PM
–

By choosing to have sex with her but not to date her when he otherwise would, it is shaming the behavior. The same one that he is perpetuating and participating in.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 02:15 PM
–

It’s hypocritical if he would still sleep with her.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/11/25 01:49 PM
4

I don’t think men putting effort into their looks makes them effeminate. How you put effort is definitely part of the equation here.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 05:28 PM
1

If AI girlfriends become a thing, won’t that prove that it’s not about being a sexless virgin, but instead it’s just the mental impact of feeling like a sexless virgin?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/11/25 03:47 PM
8

Probably a family friend, a coach, a grandparent, uncle, cousins? There are options for male role model instead of father. In fact I think it’s important for kids to have role models outside of their parents that they can connect with, because sometimes the views get too narrow. What if the parent is an asshole teaching their kid to be an asshole?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/10/25 04:16 PM
6

What’s “better treatment” here?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 07:41 PM
25

Then what’s the issue with “alpha fux beta buxx”? Would men not care if their partner wasn’t really interested so long as he has sex at an adequate enough frequency????
/r/PurplePillDebate29/10/25 03:28 PM
5

I understand that. But if you truly believe that wearing wedding rings works and makes women show more interest wouldn’t that be a sure way for men who don’t get female attention to get it? It’s cheap and easy to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/10/25 12:25 PM
6

If they are that vapid why don’t men that have an issue getting partners just all wear fake wedding rings?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/10/25 01:03 PM
2

Because you’re saying that the “had sex with a lot of people but didn’t orgasm” isn’t better. Under your view, it seems that someone that had a lot of sex, but no orgasms, should not have that diminishing of the reward system. Which implies that it’s not the diminishing reward system, but the act of sex itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/25 04:16 AM
2

Then I’d argue that the issue isn’t with the “reward system” of sex. It’s more to do with the act of sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 09:44 PM
2

Sure, but my question still remains the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 06:42 PM
2

Wait, so if someone had had a lot funded but few or no orgasms with a partner does that make a difference?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/25 06:40 PM
5

I have! I haven’t seen any actual screenshots or anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/25 12:12 AM
1

I don’t know how I can google better when I looked right on 4chan, I looked last week before stuff started getting removed.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:57 PM
12

I literally have only heard people talk about this. Almost everything else there’s proof off, there is no proof of this. If it were happening, it would be in the DMs…but I don’t even remember a DM feature being available.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:56 PM
9

I did and I saw nothing. I’m not asking you to post a literal dic pic, but I am sure there’s an article or something talking about this.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:52 PM
6

Can you provide one?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:47 PM
4

Where are the screenshot of this? They have screen shots of posts but not of this?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:45 PM
1

Me thinking a man is hot is generally not enough to sleep with him on his own. If I’m sleeping with someone fast, it’s because I already made up my mind to sleep with someone and the guy with the right amount of humor and looks happened into my life. As for this guy, we dated briefly, I really enjoyed the time we spent together, other things just didn’t work out. An ex he dated and broke up with before me revealed to him that when they were dating she lost a baby. So they got back together. So, …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 07:23 PM
3

Yes, he’s actually attractive to me. I just wasn’t attracted to him at first. His personality and attitude definitely gave him bonus points. I never found him ugly, just wasn’t attracted to him at first. The more we hung out the more I liked.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 12:16 PM
2

We didn’t meet initially as romantic prospects. We were coworkers only and then became friends. He was a great guy, we would hang out at work events, someone was always grilling or something and inviting people from work. The more we hung out the more I liked him…and the more attractive I found him. Eventually we started dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 10:48 AM
1

Yeah, but my first relationship was 3 weeks long. I cried over hot celebrities getting girlfriends that weren’t me lol. I knew nothing about that person, it wasn’t love, it was infatuation. Even my first real adult relationship, I cried about him for ages - but at the end of the day the crying doesn’t change anything. We aren’t together. If one thinks pair bonding is real, you’d have it think it’s better to stay in ANY relationship, no matter how damaging. because leaving and growing from that e…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 02:57 AM
5

I think you’re oversimplifying humans here. Every man is not the same. Every woman is not the same. Every relationship is going to be extremely different. A break up will usually hurt - and though i don’t let breakups with every guy put me in tears for months the same way as it did when my first bf and I split? I definitely still feel it the same. The only difference now is that i understand that not just any guy is meant for me. What’s the point of crying for months on end for a guy that broke …
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 01:57 AM
5

So if sex in itself is this emotional thing for women, wouldn’t this “pair bonding threshold” already be much higher for them. Any lowering of it would be unlikely to bring them down close to the level of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 01:30 AM
6

I disagree. I’ve grown to be attracted to men I had zero attraction to initially.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 12:33 AM
6

From this argument you’re saying that women going out with anyone kills their ability to “pair bond” regardless of whether or not they have sex. But this reasoning also doesn’t with men saying sex is super emotional for women. Plus, unless men are utterly emotionless, the same would be true for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/25 12:32 AM
2

But…isn’t that what someone with spontaneous desire does to their partner? They get horny and then expect their patent to also get horny at the same time just because they are. Also, responsive desire doesn’t have to start as the desire to have sex, you could be hugging, being otherwise affectionate, and that could trigger the response in you both. The response is to a situation, not to a random, internal stimulus that may have nothing to do with your partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/25 11:12 AM
1

I do not agree. On average men are all pretty much normal.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 08:36 PM
1

My main point is that it doesn’t matter. A person with bad intentions is going to have them. Doesn’t matter how much out of their league you are, doesn’t matter how nice you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 07:19 PM
1

I also still disagree. Especially if those men come solely from other men in the group. I know we aren’t supposed to use personal examples but this is all I have I my experiences. My best friend tried to set me up with her husbands (let’s call him Luke) best friend. They have been friends years. Started jobs on the same day and have both been buddies ever since. Not only did luke not know that his friend was a type 1 diabetic. He also didn’t know (or didn’t share/care) that his friend was a seve…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 07:15 PM
1

You literally said “which means nobody particularly more desirable than them” you sisd nothing about knowing information. Dating only within your social circle is not always feasible. I don’t think looking beyond your friend group is the problem here: you can meet a friend of a friend who is still an ass. Hell, my college roommate was seeing this guy, who had a single friend. The two guys lived together for years! Long story short he dated a friend of mine, got her drunk, bragged about it,and to…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 07:07 PM
1

No, you said that dating within social circle, which per you means not dating anyone more desirable than them, would “fix the issue” my point is that it won’t. Some people don’t care if they found a good partner. Dating within your league doesn’t remove cheaters and liars from your dating pool.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 06:16 PM
1

I was 19 and he was 30 and short for our area, I was definitely the peak desirability for him. I forgot to mention that I am taller than he is.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:32 PM
1

It does not create a profile for you. The people with the profile post pictures, others reply to it. My ability to apply consent to something that catches cheaters and weirdos? I think it’s a great idea! I would approve of men having their own version. I do think the apps execution was extremely flawed. There should be no AI verification - it should be done by a human. I think that there should be a limit to what can be posted and some sort of verification. For example. Posting about someone sta…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 05:17 PM
1

How does it let them use personally identifiable information? It doesn’t give any more information than someone already has. For example, the background check feature, to use it you already have to know the names, address, birthdate and more for the person you want to search. You don’t even need to tea app to run a background check at that point. It doesn’t provide any more information than Facebook and instagram do. If someone wants to make a fake profile of your they can just do that if they a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 04:40 PM
1

How is it a human rights violation! Which human rights are being violated? Of course people who have done wrong wouldn’t consent to someone revealing that they’ve done wrong. But that’s like saying it’s a human rights violation for someone to out a cheating or abusive spouse as such. The only issue is that people can and do lie. If the app required someone to provide proof and images of such proof, and only allowed responses from others that could corroborated then I’d have less of an issue. Are…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 04:30 PM
1

Dude no one cares if you ghosted a girl or stood her up. I don’t even think you should be able to post that sort of stuff on the tea apps or AWFTDG pages. If someone, man or woman, had a pattern of being abusive and dangerous, other people should know about it! The execution of the tea app is flawed, the premise, however works. They just need a better system of vetting posts and responses.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 04:23 PM
1

Do you think that most of the posts on the tea app were defamatory lies? I also didn’t see. A single nude or anything. If someone did something like that to me, yes I would sue.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 04:10 PM
22

Spontaneous desire is actually completely focused initially in the person feeling it. He looks at his partner and goes “she’s hot I want to have sex”. Or he suddenly gets horny and it’s “I’m horny and want to have sex.” Then he thinks his partner should be ready just because he is now ready to have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:45 PM
0

There was no porn on the tea app. I didn’t see a single nude pic in any of the posts. Where did you see that? As far as people being salty at rejection, the women weren’t stupid. They were calling out women who only posted a guy because he ghosted her and reporting the posts.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:38 PM
1

I understand why a woman who wants a family would want to find a partner that could, one day, support her. If she gets pregnant and has a baby, if she’s the sole breadwinner then if she has any complications during pregnancy or labor, those could be at risk if she can’t go back to work right away. Men don’t have to worry about birth injuries or permanent changes after pregnancy. So I do see why women center the man’s ability to provide if they are family focused. I don’t care how much I like a g…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:36 PM
1

Men are crappy at every level. It doesn’t matter what “social circle” you’re at. A man will cheat if he’s a shitty man. I dated a 5’5 30 year old man when I was 19, super skinny and had zero experience. That man still cheated, lied, and chased whoever he could because he was shit. It doesn’t matter if you’re in their league, out of it, or if you’re doing saint level charity work.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:26 PM
1

The biggest threat they pose is that they are violent in general. Perhaps women should be warned before dating a man like that. Let’s say that most of the things posted on the tea app are true. Do you think it’s simpler for a woman to just…risk it? What if it someone cheating on their spouse? The men that are angry are just upset they can’t be weirdos or liars without consequences anymore.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 03:15 AM
1

No the greatest threat the men pose to the women is violence… perhaps the men that are in the wrong should not be protected.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:59 AM
1

DMs with phone numbers are not publically available and would not be publically available if not for the leak. That’s like saying Facebook shares phone numbers because private messages with phone numbers were leaks. The phone number look up doesn’t let you look up phone numbers, you put a number in and if it’s publically listed you can find the name..but that’s also a service they don’t need the app to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:44 AM
1

But they don’t have that. And, honesty, if they did, they would have to make it available to applicants, or make the results available upon a rejection that’s based on its. As for the tea app, the execution was flawed, the premise is solid. Men are free to make their own version, so long as it doesn’t devolve into them making revenge porn….
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:38 AM
1

Not necessarily, in fact the advent of these apps could open up a huge area of legal practice specifically for these lawsuits. Defamation per se doesn’t even require proof of harm. Plus, in my head, the guy would KNOW of at least suspect who was posting that shit about them? But I guess I’m ahead of myself, do you think that MOST of the post on the tea app were posted by someone lying? Half? A third?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:35 AM
1

If a random company with no connection to you can find something on social media, you can find the post the defaming party made. If a job is checking your socials, they are first looking at your profile. Maybe they see what you posted, liked, followed. Then they will see stuff someone else posted about you. If there’s random company can find an inflammatory post someone tagged you in, then it’s not reasonable to say you had no way of knowing about it. Most of the time people have an issue with t…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:25 AM
1

Your argument is that you think people at random companies and randoms you haven’t even talked to in a dating app would know about this stuff being posted but the person that’s being talked about wouldn’t know? Thats not a reasonable assumption at all. If the rumor is so big that several companies you are applying to know who you are from just your resume, I guarantee you that you’d have some knowledge of what was posted and where.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:12 AM
1

Wait wait. If it’s not getting back to you? Or causing you any sort of harm (think losing your job or friends over the rumors) how do you know about it? How is it impacting you?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:10 AM
1

I’m not saying they should have a minority report -style police force. I am explaining why some people don’t report things right away or at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 02:10 AM
1

I find this to be an over simplification. I read through a LOT of posts on the app. When it was just a hot guy being a hot guy, those woke were open about it just being a competition and someone being salty about not making the cut. However, when it was a hot guy that as dangerous, the ton was almost always much more unified because he was doing ACTUAL harm. I do think there’s needs to be a different mindset when met with a guy who ghosted you after sex, vs a man who pushed you for sex and then …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:59 AM
1

My knowledge and focus on data privacy knows that it’s a bit more complicated than that. What constitutes the purpose of harassment gets iffy. It’s part of the reason why the tea app is so particular about what its users can post and not allowing screenshots. Posting on the tea app, on its face, is probably not going to be doxing, The issues come in when people lie. Or post things not allowed.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:54 AM
1

Men’s phones numbers, addresses and ids are not on the tea app. There are two or so premium services that the app provides, both of which you have to pay for. One is background check, the requested has to pay for it, and has to to already know some information (name, bday, address) about the person they want info on, it’s only shared with that person who paid and requested it. It is not shared with anyone else or publicly on the app. The second one I am aware of, is the sex offender search. Whic…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:51 AM
1

Yes, but the federal government also is reactionary, meaning the crime has to happen, which usually necessitates some harm before the perpetrators is caught. But that’s why some women don’t report to the police right away, they just won’t be fast enough to stop something from happening.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:45 AM
0

The public records search is a private feature and you have to already know a bunch of info about a man to access it. And it’s not available to the whole app, only the specific woman that requests it. But also, you can get access to that info without the tea app. They just repackaged a service that already exists . Yeah the women have to buy a background check, but form what I searched when I was checking out the app, they basically just send you to another service. But it’s a premium/paid featu…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:31 AM
0

Uhh no it doesn’t. The sex offender register that it linked to is the actual national database. If you’re coming up in that then you probably deserve to be on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:30 AM
1

The phone numbers thing is risky. Maybe the last four digits , her age, and city would be enough? But I can see that just turning into women getting harassed by random men. But I also think it’s important that both sides have some facts. Like are you “on a roster” if she just started talking to you that day? Did you guys talk about being exclusive. I have the same issue with women using the tea app to complain about a man ghosting them after sex. Or something like that unless it’s attached to so…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:27 AM
1

Yeah it is a crime. Doesn’t mean the police will be able to catch the culprits before someone is hurt over this. The Tea app doesn’t post addresses or even phone numbers of men. Yet the women’s info gets leaked and now their personal safety is at risk. White pages don’t even really exist anymore. Tea app limits downloading and screenshots. You’d have to literally take a pic of your phone and reverse image search on a pic to get anything. They only do first names. The app is flawed, don’t get me …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:21 AM
1

Only if they can find the person. What if it’s shared via text or email? It’s 2025, nothing can be truly deleted.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:19 AM
-2

My argument is that the doxxing in question, can be easily fixed if the claim is untrue. Are you suffering harm because of stuff someone is posted about you? Was it untrue? Boom, prima facie defamation case right there. Maybe even defamation per se if the claims were sexual or otherwise extremely harmful to your reputation in nature. I actually think we should empower people to bring defamation claims for things like this. Make people see consequences for lying, publically call them out as liar …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:19 AM
0

Technically, sharing pics and names available on dating apps/social media is not doxing. And it’s only defamation if it’s NOT true. EtA: it’s not doxxing on its own. But depending on how much identifying info is shared, it could be in some cases. But it also depends on how the website it’s being posted on stored info. Like for the tea app, you can’t take screenshots so it can’t be shared outside the app easily.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:11 AM
-3

They do. So many of the guys on there were cheaters at best or downright dangerous at worse. Do you think that someone being accused of being physically abusive on the tea app wouldn’t sue if it wasn’t true?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:07 AM
1

How does that stop something from permanently following you? The original poster takes it down, great. 400 people downloaded it before they did. Now how do you stop it?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:06 AM
-1

If you don’t know someone’s lying about you about something. Or saying something about you, how are you being socially damaged? Like if no one in you life is treating you differently, you aren’t hearing about these supposed lies, how is it damaging you? I definitely think that people should only be able to post things with some evidence, like a screenshot or images, and not just be able to flag guys as a reply.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:04 AM
-1

I know domestic violence is a legal term. But because abusive is loosely defined, don’t you think it’s good for women that encouraged a man that was abusive, in some way, to warn others? What’s if he was verbally abusive? Mentally? If it’s true I don’t see the harm. Again, I ask, how many men were threatened or physically harmed from being posted on the app? Yet people are leaking women’s home addresses, emails and emails, phone numbers, personal info. It’s not equivalent at all to posting someo…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 01:02 AM
-2

A lot of the women do go to the police. But that won’t stop other women from being victims in the interim. Some women don’t want to go because they feel like they guy will embarrass them by posting nudes/vids or doing whatever else that will permanently following them forever in today’s modern age. There were also instances of cheating, lying, manipulation, things that while aren’t illegal, should be warned against if he’s doing them to others. Again, if they are lying, sue for defamation. If th…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 12:57 AM
1

They are not accepting for dating, only for the possibility of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 12:49 AM
-5

I mean how many men died from being posted on the tea app. Like men going and hurting these women is actually proving teas point: that some men are dangerous, violent and will target those that try to warn other. The best part about defamation is that truth is the ULTIMATE defense. If you get posted and someone is lying, that’s an easy lawsuit to win.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 12:46 AM
-6

They made it not open to men because some men were threatening bodily harm to women that outed their bad behavior. Thats what the AWDTSG groups verify and try to limit the ability to screen shot by allowing anonymous postings. It’s not that they don’t want everyone to see, it’s that they know that some people will become violent if their dirty laundry is aired.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 12:44 AM
-10

How many people ended up dead from the tea app?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/25 12:42 AM
–

So what are you basing it off?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 06:49 PM
–

I actually looked through the app several times. Most of them men being complained about the most were not 7/8. Everyone was super average except for a few, who were by and large also problematic. You’re also comparing verification photos to dating profile photos.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 06:35 PM
–

The guys aren’t even out here being alpha males. They are just cheating at best or being abusive at worst. Most of them are average looking, average height, average income, they just choose to be shitty relationship partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 05:09 PM
–

Download the tea app and look at the men being posted. The majority of them are not chads.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/25 03:49 PM
–

They did make one. It was removed in two days because the men kept using it just to post nudes.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/25 05:23 PM
1

I feel like you need to specify that you’re talking about a scene in a regular movie, not something on onlyfans. Seems like a lot of the guys are confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/25 10:40 AM
1

Yes, so it’s based in insecurity that she could cheat. And again, the paternity test does not fix that at all. Would you be okay if your wife went out, fucked other dudes, but never carried any of their babies to term? I doubt you’d be okay with that. This is an insecurity. It’s disingenuous to try to package it was anything else. This is something you need to talk to your partner. Were you cheated on very badly in the past. By your partner? By the partner before her? Did someone commit paternit…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 10:34 PM
-2

The paternity test doesn’t prove she’s faithful.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 07:53 PM
1

I said women that sleep with them the fastest. Not necessarily promiscuous. But more so putting sex before other qualities that are a better indicator of compatibility l.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:42 PM
1

Yeah but I never had sex with him. So how does that relate to me?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:36 PM
-1

So how does paternity test help us work past the fact that he thinks I’m cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:36 PM
-2

No, I mean this specifically for married couples. If you think your wife is cheating getting a paternity test won’t solve that. If you truly think she’s cheating- even if the child is yours , you wouldn’t be okay being in that relationship regardless of if she only bore your child. Right? If a man has that much distrust over women in general thats not something a paternity test can fix. No matter what, if he’s that distrustful he will understand that a positive paternity test doesn’t mean his wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:11 PM
1

Like a dozen or so dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:10 PM
1

How do either of those things pertain to this post? I’m talking about my experiences as this has happened like 7 times now. I feel like I’d have better luck if I was just giving it out to anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:03 PM
1

No, I mean this specifically for married couples. If you think your wife is cheating getting a paternity test won’t solve that. If you truly think she’s cheating- even if the child is yours , you wouldn’t be okay being in that relationship regardless of if she only bore your child. Right? If a man has that much distrust over women in general thats not something a paternity test can fix. No matter what, if he’s that distrustful he will understand that a positive paternity test doesn’t mean his wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 06:02 PM
1

It takes me a while to get to the physical part. Seems like an issue that I can’t get past. But it’s all good. Kinda felt like it was coming. I was planning on breaking down a few of those intimacy barriers this weekend but alas…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 04:18 PM
2

I’m just happy I didn’t sleep with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 04:18 PM
5

Men don’t care how nice you are, how respectful you are, or how feminine you are. You could be open to splitting dates, buying them gifts. You could be their perfect match but they will always pick the woman they sleeps with them the fastest! Even if she’s full of red flags and disrespect. Sad post breakup rant over…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 04:07 PM
-3

Do you have a reason to think your partner is cheating? Do you actually think the babies not yours? I agree it should be a thing for child support or unmarried couples. But a man asking his wife for a paternity test for no reason, where she’s given him no reason to think she’s cheating, is ludicrous. It’s just humiliating at best and at worse it points to a level of paranoia and mistrust that won’t be fixed with a paternity test.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/25 03:53 PM
3

That last one is crazy!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:22 PM
2

He says he is! I just want to make sure I’m showing him I am interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:20 PM
3

In modern times? Being single and waiting for a man that actually likes them cross their path.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:17 PM
1

How is it oppression?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:16 PM
1

How to keep him interested when I’m not ready for full-on physical intimacy?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/25 08:16 PM
1

So the woman didn’t change anything about herself to make the man start acting this way?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/25 12:19 PM
3

why is it going to shit? Obviously her having past partners didn’t stop her form being a good girlfriend.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/25 04:26 PM
10

This proves my point. You think that the sex you’re having, in this situation, isn’t satisfying.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 10:16 PM
10

How much details are you giving to one another about your past sexual experiences?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 10:15 PM
11

Wait so most of the time men are disappointed by the sex they have?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 07:16 PM
21

This always confuses me. It makes me think that men that think this way aren’t having the sex they want with their gf. I feel like even if you have to wait for whatever reason, for sex and it’s good and she’s being an engaging partner physically and emotionally, the guy won’t be upset that she had whatever with some dude in the past. However, if the woman is “making him wait”, doing little to help to help the relationship grow while also making her current partner feel unsure, then I’d see his p…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/25 06:42 PM
2

I’m pretty sure my message was clear. Never said I didn’t know what they were waiting for. I just was wondering what he meant by “wait”. Are men saying that women aren’t sleeping with them at all? Are they waiting for marriage? For three months? What’s the length of time?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 09:57 PM
3

Longer than what? Are they not having sex at all? How long are they making them wait?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 06:07 PM
1

Wait for how long? Are you saying a lot women are waiting for marriage to have sex with some guys?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/25 12:34 AM
3

Not even. This is the kind of thing you keep to yourself. Women already know that you find us sexually attractive: men wouldn’t be seeking a relationship with you otherwise. We know the reason you swiped/approached/asked us out is because you hope to one day have sex with us. Men do not need to tell women these things.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/25 11:39 AM
1

The list is: Mutual love and affection Healthy communications Compatible morals/ethics Healthy boundaries with extended family (his parts/siblings) If we want kids 200k minimum combined income Assuming he cleared the list for me to date him, this is all that’s needed after for marriage in my opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/25 07:42 PM
3

I will always use condoms until I’m married. I don’t care if I’m on BC, I won’t have unprotected sex unless I am comfortable having a baby with the man.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/25 02:40 AM
2

You’re assuming she’s going to be obsessed with you and not want you to change. She will scream and cry and say you don’t love her because you won’t change.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/25 08:52 PM
3

What does a man with no job who plays video games 24/7 have to offer a partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/25 08:49 PM
4

You wouldn’t count modeling as real modeling?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/25 07:48 PM
3

How does one lead in a relationship in your eyes
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 11:04 PM
1

The high value nonsense is just an attempt to make it seem like you can buy loyalty: you can’t. Some people are going to be awful partners. It doesn’t matter how rich your were or how little experience she had before you. Some people will cheat just because the wind blows differently one day… They are selfish so they don’t care about others. And only want the make it so that they are in the best position possible. Instead of focusing on being high value, try finding a partner that values you for…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 06:44 PM
1

These guys say the wildest things. Your partner gaining weight or becoming less fit is not ideal. But it will happen with age. I think it’s understandable to encourage your partner to stay healthy, but there’s definitely a balance needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 06:41 PM
1

I’m so sorry to hear that.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 05:36 PM
1

This man said his worst fear is his girlfriend gaining weight. What a great world to be in when your worst fear is literally fat on someone else’s body. Some people deserve to be alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 05:21 PM
1

But we haven’t gone on a date where we’ve had to pay for anything. Museum was free. I actually got half off the boba with a coupon. Another guy we went to a show at the met (that I got for free as a perk from work) came with free drinks and snacks. So he insisted on dinner. Early dates should be cheap if not free exactly for this reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 01:05 AM
1

How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 01:00 AM
1

Isn’t that weird to say on a first or second date though?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 12:42 AM
1

No idea. I move pretty slow physically, so that’s usually a deal breaker for a lot of guys. Since being physical isn’t big deal, I think it’s unfair of me to ask them for exclusivity when I don’t know when I’ll be comfortable with the physical part. Does that make sense?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 12:31 AM
1

They do insist! But I’ll do something small in that case like pay for their subway home if we are going to same direction. I always offer…but the guy I’m seeing now is definitely seeing other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 12:30 AM
1

Ohhh my god that would send me into a coma. I go on maybe like one date a week.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/25 12:01 AM
11

A woman whose husband has a second family could also be suffering from frauds. Let’s say he’s the main breadwinner, now his wife and her children are out of money because either: The husband is doing the right thing and caring for his children outside of the marriage. Or The mistress sues for child support. Additionally, any time spent with the second family is time he is NOT spending with his wife and kids. He cannot be a doting, caring partner or a good father while he’s splitting his time bet…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:59 PM
1

That makes more sense then. Because I’ve had first dates go really well. And some just doomed from the second we sat down…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:55 PM
1

How many dates were you going on per week?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:54 PM
1

What do you mean but it not “working as intended?”
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:51 PM
1

I mean like in the very early phase. You haven’t defined the relationship yet. Probably have only been out on one or two dates.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:50 PM
1

Sleeping with multiple people for me is a no. I won’t sleep with more than one person, and if I’m sleeping with one person I’m not dating anyone else but that person. So for me, once sex enters into the picture there are not other options
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:50 PM
1

I always offer and don’t pick expensive first dates. Like the last guy, we went to a museum and then got boba.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:41 PM
1

What’s long?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:25 PM
1

Do you know from the first date if you want to be exclusive with someone?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:25 PM
2

I think my vetting process has started to work because now I’m having actual convos with men who I could reasonably go on dates with. I just don’t want to get hung up on one guy who may not like me all that much (Because maybe he’s talking to others too) and possibly lose out on someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 11:02 PM
1

What do you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:58 PM
1

I get a lot of offers for first dates. Generally I’m very picky about who I go out with. But the constant starting over from scratch is exhausting me a teensy bit.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:58 PM
1

I mean like for first or second dates. How are you more serous with someone you’ve never met or only met once?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:57 PM
1

From what point in dating?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:56 PM
1

From what point?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:56 PM
2

How do you know who your best option is?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:46 PM
1

How do you feel about dating (not sleeping with) multiple people in the early phase?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/25 10:37 PM
1

Can you tell n-count just by looking at someone?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/25 12:06 AM
1

In this scenario am I not the wife carrying the baby? It’s literally about the couple.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:36 PM
1

Then I’d wonder if you actually think your wife is cheating. You’re saying that you have a legitimate doubt about whether the baby your wife is carrying is yours…you can act normally for nine months - pick baby names, go to doctors appointments, parenting classes, all that…all while thinking that baby isn’t yours? I seriously think some men just want to do this as a way to shame their partners and then having them accept it. The fucked up part is, they aren’t even being shamed for their son acti…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 10:46 AM
1

I never said the husband didn’t love her. I’m saying does trust her. And not in small way…like maybe you can’t trust her to be on time for a dinner. But this is you not being able to trust her in a huge way. You don’t trust that she’s carrying your child. Not only that - but you also either think she’s dumb enough to cheat and get pregnant (yet somehow not give any indication that she’s cheating) or evil and vile enough to cheat, get pregnant, and then knowingly and purposefully pass the child o…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:49 AM
3

Okay, so let’s say the baby is actually yours. How do you deal with the fact that your wife could still be cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:39 AM
2

You don’t. But this was me assuming that the two of you agreed to be married. Actually, in the “trust me bro” case, a paternity test makes more sense…as once you’re married a husband is automatically assumed to be the father of any children his wife has. Regardless of their actual paternity. If you’re really that worried, it actually makes more sense to not marry her, because then, if she sued for child support, you could just request a paternity test.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:38 AM
3

Even if you’re basing it off the probability that the baby is not yours…for whatever reason, the chance of it being a matter of infidelity is much higher than it being a hospital mix up. There is no other reason you’d ask for a paternity test though. If you think there was a hospital mix up you could just test the mother. Paternity test are just to find out if you’re the father. Further, if you’re so mathematically inclined. What are the odds that you and your wife would plan for pregnancy, trac…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:29 AM
2

You think it’s appropriate to “put on a face” during the nine months of pregnancy when you and your wife are supposed to be becoming parents? This sounds like psychopath behavior. And it sounds damaging to you and your partner. She’s over there happy, growing your baby. While you’re wondering if it’s yours. Getting a paternity test does not solve the fact that you think she’s cheating. How will you deal with that? Are you going to put on a face for the entirety of your marriage? Even if you secr…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:21 AM
2

Okay so you’re going to act completely normal for the 9months she’s pregnant? Even though you have doubts that the baby is yours?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 02:17 AM
2

How can you say you’re going to act normally if you have even the slightest suspicion that she might be cheating? Answer honestly, is getting paternity test about confirming whether your partner is cheating, or is it about quieting your own baseless anxiety?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:38 AM
0

Are you going to be able to behave normally during the pregnancy if you think the baby isn’t yours? And that you’ wife is cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:26 AM
2

No one’s answering my question. How are you going to do it discreetly before the baby is there? Are you going to be a good partner during the pregnancy if you have a doubt that the baby is yours? Men always jump to asking for it at birth…but how are you acting the whole 9 months before?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 01:05 AM
1

Well, if you’re a silly guy that’s pro paternity test can you answer?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:53 AM
1

So is he treating me okay during the pregnancy if he truly thinks the baby might not be his? Is he excited? Is he being a present father? Did he ask me if the baby was his when I announced to him that I was pregnant? How can man with this much doubt be a good partner during the pregnancy?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:48 AM
2

The planning one would make me purposefully only have sex when I’m not fertile. Like we are literally out here fucking on a schedule that’s best to help is conceive…how dare you then ask me if this baby we planned for is yours.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:46 AM
1

This didn’t answer a single one of my questions .
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:45 AM
2

Apparently a not so quiet part of this subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:39 AM
3

Q4M that want paternity test for their wives and think it’s a reasonable request : she tells you she’s pregnant are you going to: 1. Ask if it’s yours then and there? 2. Are you going to go through the pregnancy behaving like the baby is yours prior to getting a paternity test?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/25 12:31 AM
1

Nothing about that is selfish: if my husband feels that he needs a paternity test I will give him one. End statement. if he cannot voice the reasoning why he believes I am carrying another man’s baby, then I do not think I could continue a relationship with him, because a positive test does nothing for the lack of trust he seems to inherently have in me. If my Husband counted every dollar I gave to him to make sure it was the right amount I would also feel weird about that. Does my husband think…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 11:35 PM
2

I’m fine with men asking for a paternity test. I will give my husband one if he asks for one. But I will not continue to be married to him if he cannot voice WHY he thinks I AM NOT CARRYING HIS CHILD AND WHY HE THINKS I CHEATED. If he can tell me a reason why I lost his trust, I will do the test, apologize profusely and work out with him ways that I can earn his trust back. I would feel terrible putting him through that intentionally. If he is just asking for or just because…diff story.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 09:49 PM
1

I’m fine with men asking for a paternity test. I will give my husband one if he asks for one. But I will not continue to be married to him if he cannot voice WHY he thinks I AM NOT CARRYING HIS CHILD AND WHY HE THINKS I CHEATED. If he can tell me a reason why I lost his trust, I will do the test, apologize profusely and work out with him ways that I can earn his trust back. I would feel terrible putting him through that intentionally. If he is just asking for or just because…diff story.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 09:38 PM
2

Only if he could not verbalize the reason for his lack of trust that the baby is his. otherwise, even if I provide him with a paternity test proving the baby is his, it does nothing to prove I didn’t cheat. The lack of trust will remain.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 01:06 AM
1

No I said he needs to be able to verbalize why he feels I’ve been unfaithful. You skilled over that part entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 12:53 AM
2

That isn’t true at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 12:51 AM
1

I don’t Ming men asking for paternity test. If my husband could verbalize why he felt I was unfaithful and tell me how I lost his trust, then of course I would understand why he thought it was needed. But if he has no reason to think I’m cheating then it just seems like nothing I do will ever convince him otherwise. He can have the paternity test, the baby will be his. He just won’t have to worry about having me as a wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 12:30 AM
2

I just need men to admit that they don’t trust the women they are having babies with. Tell me out the gate you won’t ever trust me? Then let me decide if I want to have a baby with you. Plus I’d baffled if my husband and I planned for a baby, tracked my cycle and all that. Only to ask for a paternity test after.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/25 12:20 AM
-1

Why do you need to verify?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 09:09 PM
1

Honestly I’m just gonna get a surrogate. My feelings will be hurt either way, even if it’s under the guise of “hospital mess up”. Because you don’t need a paternity test to check for a mess up at the hospital, they could just test the mother. At least with a surrogate they are already going to do the tests to make sure the correct embryo was implanted into the correct surrogate. And I don’t have to get my feelings hurt because I risked life and limb for a man who ultimately didn’t trust me to ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 05:39 PM
4

Sure, but if your first thought isn’t “let’s make sure something else didn’t happen” then you have To admit that the main reason for the paternity test was because you did not trust your wife.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 05:35 PM
4

So, you aren’t going to make sure the baby is actually hers? What if there was a switch at the hospital? What if something else happened. You don’t trust your wife. This is why I say trust but verify is bullshit: you’re getting it because you don’t trust your wife to not cheat on you.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 03:58 PM
0

Trust but verify is bullshit in this standard. Let’s say you ask your wife for a paternity test. It comes back as the child not being yours, what’s the first thing you do?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 03:53 PM
3

For married couples it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 03:46 PM
7

The beach if trust is there because he feels he needs the test anyway. In the guys mind, the woman already breached the trust, she can’t fix it no matter what.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/25 03:44 PM
1

Years without having sex??? This is not normal. You should be able to be intimate with your partner. It’s is not normal to not have sex for years at a time when you’re in a committed relationship. Example you get married when you’re both 22. Have a baby at 24. Do you think it would be normal for this couple to just…stop having sex for years?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 04:05 PM
1

Do you think dead bedrooms are a problem?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/25 12:04 AM
1

Because I don’t want to think sex is gross and be unable to have it with my future partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 08:25 PM
1

That’s what I thought. But I got into a really heated discussion about how I couldn’t be sex positive if I, personally, did not engage casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 06:35 PM
1

Can you be sex-positive without wanting to engage in causal sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 06:30 PM
–

Third date update: I like him. We have a great banter, there’s chemistry there (I think) but I often wonder how much chemistry is just the ability to get along with someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/25 01:09 AM
–

Can you explain what you disagree with? Or do you not really have anything to add aside from sad attempts at insulting me?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 09:45 PM
–

If you have to worry about whether or not the woman you’re married to and having sex with if faithful maybe you shouldn’t be having sex with her. If you’re saying this is just a warrantless, baseless concern that men are going to have, regardless of the actual fidelity of their wife, then I’d still say it’s something you need to ask for before marriage. How stupid is it to get married, plan for a pregnancy, track her cycle, then ask her “hey I know we planned for this and I trust you completely,…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 09:27 PM
–

So would you ask for a paternity test without any sign of cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 09:22 PM
–

Realistically, how would a kid that’s not yours be in your wife’s womb if not cheating? Hospital mix ups are not common and don’t require a paternity test to verify. They could just test that the baby is the mother’s. Paternity test assume you know the mother of the child. You are only testing who the father is…how else would a wife be pregnant with a child that’s not her husbands? If there is a REASON to verify other than cheating then I don’t think your wife would be upset at you for asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 06:16 PM
–

So you’re fine with her cheating so long as she’s not bringing another man’s child home?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 06:06 PM
–

But that still does zero about the underlying lack of trust. Do you not care if your partner is cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:45 PM
–

Asking for a paternity test from your wife, who you have no reason to believe is cheating, is crazy. It’s not something people just do. If you really feel that you need to verify whether your wife’s kids are yours, then I doubt that you aren’t acting out in other ways - you think your wife is cheating…that’s a big emotional and mental blow that would mess anyone up. This is why I think it’s important to be able to talk to your partner about why you lost trust in them to the point where you need …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:37 PM
–

Again, if you can’t verbalize why you think to it partner is cheating on you, getting a paternity test won’t fix the lack of trust.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:30 PM
–

What part of my post are you replying to?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:27 PM
–

Paternity test discourse is making rounds again in online spaces. If you can’t verbalize why you want a paternity test (and thus think your partner is cheating) then you won’t be satisfied with the results of a test, because a kid coming back as yours does not tell you whether or not your partner is cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/25 05:24 PM
2

It’s a cult. Someone on TikTok said he doesn’t care because it’s “owning the libs”
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 11:02 PM
6

Dating app Ick of the day: he said he hasn’t had a home cooked meal in years?!! Because he doesn’t cook.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 11:01 PM
0

I’m saying that the mind-set doesn’t really make sense. Because those same women would put down someone that had an expensive, but small ring, because for the most part they aren’t buying for quality but instead size. Because most people cannot afford both high quality and large diamonds. I also meant to add that I’m getting a diamond for the look, so I don’t care if it’s lab grown. I’d prefer it to be lab grown versus having it be unethically sourced regardless of quality.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 07:42 PM
1

I feel like lab growns weren’t as well known back then. I was in HS in that time too. The opinions were either not get a diamond or diamond. Lab grown seems to have risen in popularity recently. Personally, I’m getting a diamond for the look anyway. Unless it’s a family heirloom, the ring is to just say “this is how much my future husband thinks I’m worth”. The same women who want big diamonds would think a solitaire Harry Winston was cheap….
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 07:32 PM
2

This! I don’t care if I can afford a natural diamond, I’d prefer getting the ethical lab grown one. No one can tell the difference…and honestly no one should be asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 07:10 PM
0

I truly feel like these are comments are being started by men larping sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 06:52 PM
1

Girl what?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 06:51 PM
2

I do think there are some women that are chronically online they put wayyy too harsh standards on (their) men. And then try to hide it under the guise of him just treating her had she deserves. There’s a current trend going on right now about engagement rings. Lab grown diamonds made the engagement ring decision more accessible and ethical. You could get a bigger ring. Now some women are acting like lab grown diamonds are the same level as cubic zirconia or moissanite. Now these women are toutin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/25 06:50 PM
–

If you can cheat it seems like you have the leverage though right? A partner doesn’t like it and you will leave. That’s the reasoning OP gave with the money basically…you’ll take your resource away. Guys that say this kind of thing don’t actually have the leverage to cheat, or else they wouldn’t be trying so hard to get a woman that wouldn’t leave them. They understand that the woman also has wayyy more leverage to leave him than he does to leave her. The only thing he might be able to get an ad…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 05:54 PM
–

Just because someone has more leverage doesn’t mean they will find someone that’s okay with them cheating. The woman might just…also cheat, what’s she going to lose? She already doesn’t have commitment from the guy: he can file for divorce at any time and seems to have no issue finding women. Even in cultures where there is polygyny, it’s expensive as fuck. And he can’t just go cheat, he has to get another wife, give her equal to what his current wife has, and make sure he isn’t neglecting or be…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 05:44 PM
–

Why not just be in an open relationship? What if you’re desirable but with someone who is not interested in sharing? It’s okay to not want monogamy, but the expectation to force someone into monogamy while you fuck other people is kinda crazy, no?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 05:26 PM
–

So if the woman makes six figures she can cheat too right?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/25 05:19 PM
3

OLD is overrun with men. It’s mostly men, the more men you have, especially given the limited swiped, the less men will get swiped. Online dating apps should give women unlimited swiped and give men limited ones. And it should let men see who has already swiped on them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 07:30 PM
6

That’s true with almost anything though. In this context OP is insisting that every woman who doesn’t swipe right on him considers him sub-human… This is false. Most of the women are just not physically interested in him, some don’t like his profile or his values or whatever hobbies they share. And a few might just be mean and think people that don’t meet their looks criteria aren’t worth their time. Is that last person someone you’d want to date anyway?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 07:00 PM
4

The poster I was replying to said that because women swipe very rarely only OLD apps it means that those women think the men they aren’t swiping on are sub-human. Just because someone does not swipe on you or is not attracted to you, on it own, does not mean they think you are sub-human.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 06:55 PM
6

I feel like you’re either: really young and dealing with teenagers or early twenty’s who are still mean from high school. Or your harmless greetings aren’t as harmless as you think. Some people are just mean for no reason online though. Had a guy match with me once just so he could call me racial slurs…the anonymity of the internet makes people bold.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 06:38 PM
7

Everyone is not obligated to want to have an physical or intimate relationship with you. Thats the point I’m trying to make.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 05:50 PM
14

Just because someone doesn’t find you attractive doesn’t mean they think you are sub-human.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/25 05:10 PM
–

On the flip side, would you stay with someone who was not willing to self-improve?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 04:57 PM
–

We work in the same building. He met me there!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 01:14 PM
–

Been steadily losing weight - now a guy that I went on a date with in the middle of last year, who broke things off after the first date because he thought I wasn’t actually “his type (I was too fat for him) is trying to come back. Nope sorry, not happening.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/25 12:59 PM
1

Men don’t treat all women with respect and courtesy. You might, but that doesn’t make it true for everyone. I encounter men being rude towards someone almost every day. People, regardless of gender, can just be jerks.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:21 PM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:08 PM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:08 PM
1

What do you think would be the impact?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:08 PM
2

Q4M: do you think men would be happier if all women were “sluts” and more sexually free?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 09:39 PM
1

Do better in what way? I gave zero facts about qualities/wants I have for men, simply listed three of my own. I never said “men are to blame for dating being hard” I simply said dating is hard . I have lots of friends both male and female. My personal life isn’t the problem. It’s specifically the dating part that’s hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 04:05 PM
1

I said the majority of men we meet and have personal relationships with are only there because they want to have sex with us. Meaning like random guys you meet and are friendly with…probably he’s being nice at first because he thinks you’re attractive. The friendship part seems to form secondarily in a lot of cases. Even if it’s only minutes or hours later. I have a lot of guy friends that I am not attracted to, I don’t think they are attracted to me, but if they are, they know we are just frien…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:20 PM
1

The issue is, they are giving me dating advice based on what worked for them. I can’t do what worked for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:16 PM
1

Dang, I have zero of that lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:12 PM
1

My friend had gone out day drinking over a long weekend. The guy randomly messaged her to go out. She accepted they got more drinks. It’s just so weird to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:12 PM
1

Oh no, I’m just clumsy. I bumbled the glass with my bag when I got up to go to the restroom….it just spilled on the table. Happens? And I was nervous, because it’s a date. But geeze give a girl some grace here. I feel like, when I compare my dating life to my friends, I have to be way more “perfect” to get any real interest.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:08 PM
1

Did they literally throw up on you? Because my friend threw up ON her husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 02:05 PM
1

Dating is so hard for no reason. I’m cute. I’m normal. I’m going to hire someone to clean the house. What’s the issue? How is it possible that my friend pukes on her now husband on their first date and someone manages to get a second date. But when I spill some water, not even on him, the guy says he weirded out because I was nervous.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 01:46 PM
5

You do realize that these lessons are for how to treat men that you like/are going to marry. They are for how to treat your future husband, not for the random men that hit on you in the hallway. My mom used to tell me to be nice to everyone. But then she once saw how a guy kept pestering me ever after I told him I wasn’t interested. Everyone should still be treating you with a social level of kindness and respect - as in, they should not go out of their way to be mean. But rejecting an offer for…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:27 AM
21

Girl same. My parents didn’t talk a lot about sex directly growing up but they certainly made sure I knew that men only wanted one thing and if I gave it to anyone but my husband no one would ever ever love me. They made sex seem like this demeaning act that was horrible - but for some reason men still wanted it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/25 11:20 AM
1

Because we see men as people and don’t mind being friends with someone just because we think they’d be a good friend? Why do you have friends at all?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 06:44 PM
0

What does this even mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:49 AM
0

He said essentially if you don’t split on the first date, he won’t let you pay for subsequent dates. That doesn’t make any sense. He said he won’t let someone pay if they don’t pay on the first date.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:48 AM
1

He said essentially if you don’t split on the first date, he won’t let you pay for subsequent dates. That doesn’t make any sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:47 AM
2

This isn’t taking a precaution…it’s just saying you’d let a woman who you felt was hot enough run your pockets dry and not care.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:38 AM
0

Wait what?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:35 AM
4

I think women enjoy having gay friends because they know that the gay man is in the friendship because he wants to be. Not because he wants to one day sleep with her. He, as a man, can genuinely like her, understand her, enjoy time with her - all without there being a physical element to it. It’s kind of sad for women that, for the majority of men they meet and form personal relationships with, most of them will only be in their life with the caveat that they will eventually have sex, or some so…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:35 AM
5

So men with little sexual experience are getting partners and settling down now!?!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/25 10:22 AM
3

So you have friends commenting that they are on their periods? Or random women?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/25 02:02 PM
6

Do you have women randomly telling you this???
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/25 12:38 PM
1

The eternal part kind of does. But also, how can someone the loves you hurt you in that watch for even a small amount of time? Especially for something that being knew you would do, because he formed you and is all-knowing?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 05:29 PM
1

I think that depends on whether or not your religion has a concept of hell/eternal suffering for mortal crimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 05:11 PM
1

Where is unconditional love in church?!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/25 04:58 PM
–

Exactly! Men in trades also work grueling 12 hour shifts, wear down their body and are one terrible work accident away from being on workers comp. Some lifestyles don’t mesh. I wouldn’t be able to date anyone that had to regularly work non-standard hours, regardless of education or status.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 04:55 PM
3

It’s not. The society is inherently a place where people can practice their beliefs freely in a way the choose. But we can’t say society is inherently Christian when, for a large portion of our society, we mistreated gods creatures in a way that should have condemned all who practiced and fought for it to hell.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 12:07 PM
2

Oh so only Christian us citizens are “good people”. Your entire premise presumes that I even grew up Christian.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 11:47 AM
1

You should not need religion to tell you to be a good person. Most people in the US don’t actually even study their religion at all. They don’t read the Bible or go to church regularly. They will still lie, cheat, or steal…hell, we even encourage kids to have “false idols”. (Hello Easter bunny and santa). So which part of religion stops people from doing those things? What about the parts of the Bible that tell people to do bad things? Leviticus encourages slavery among a host if other things. S…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 09:16 AM
2

Again, terrible person.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:34 AM
3

Then most people are terrible who could be convinced to murder if they think their god told them so. Most people are not monsters.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:34 AM
4

Needing any sort of religious figure to gain qualities that show socialization and empathy is a strange. Good people dont steal, hurt or purposefully disrespect others because they understand that whoever they are acting out against also have feelings and a life. Religion is personal and deeply held. It doesn’t need to be brought into everything for everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/25 02:33 AM
5

If you need religion to tell you not to murder or hurt others you’re a terrible person.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/25 11:32 PM
2

Him: ending habeus corpus will only impact criminals and illegals. Me: okay, so what if someone makes a mistake, or they get a legal citizen on accident? Him: they’d show their papers in court, dumbass. Me: 🧐
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 04:17 PM
2

Yeah the women that go for chronic criminals and deadbeats are usually not the women that men actually want to end up with long term…they just think they want those women because that’s all they see.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 03:43 PM
2

She knew him for a literal day? Do you think the average woman is that dumb? That man’s not even hot. You think most women are doing shit like this for men they’ve known for 24 hours?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 03:34 PM
1

Do you stop growing in life after 25?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 03:31 PM
1

You have a couple of options here: Make him a renter at a low rate. He doesn’t deserve equity in your home. If you got married, the house probably wouldn’t even qualify as a marital asset because you bought it prior to being married. Charge him a token rent, or just spilt utilities and other bills. Write up a lease - register your home as a rental property if need be. You get to keep your home as your home, he gets assurances that you can’t just throw him out if something happens. Don’t charge h…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 12:13 PM
1

Do they think conservatives are going to encourage them right have fun and get laid?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 12:04 PM
2

Being a good partner and being a good parent are separate issues. Your status as a parent should have zero to do with your spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 11:33 AM
0

I don’t think this is true. I think too many men don’t view their partners political beliefs as anything of consequence. Plus, in my experience the “liberal” women that are happy to date and marry conservative men are the ones willing to ignore his moral and or ethical failings.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 11:28 AM
1

I’m not talking about for hookups, I’m talking about the number of conservative men willing to attempt to actually date liberal women long term. They don’t care and it’s so weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 11:10 AM
1

I never said they weren’t. Just that they seem to be very interested in dating liberal women, despite the mismatch in moral and ethical views.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 01:33 AM
0

I can 100% guarantee I would not. I’ve left dates with attractive men because they expressed some repugnant views when they felt a little comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/25 01:32 AM
2

Why do conservative men love liberal women? No, I’m not willing to “agree to disagree” on whether or not certain groups of people should have certain rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/25 11:38 PM
1

Why do men think accountability only means “I did xyz and I regret it?”
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/25 11:33 PM
2

Finally made it back to reply. Your post makes it seem like the women you were talking to were fine marrying men they had no desire to have kids with, so long as they could talk those men into raising some random IVF baby…regardless of the husbands fertility. Was that an incorrect interpretation?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/25 11:02 PM
0

…I know we aren’t supposed to discount the experience of others…..but are you trying to have us believe that two women told you that, if they found partners, they would stay with the partner but not have their baby? This is ridiculous. I’ve never heard anyone say this. And I’m gonna doubt that you honestly haven’t heard anyone say it either.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/25 02:55 PM
1

What’s an example of a good bio?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 08:43 PM
1

What information do you want to see in a dating profile? Or is it really just pictures?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 06:12 PM
1

No thank you!!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 05:21 PM
1

Really just need ENM people to get their own app. This man had his full wedding photo on his profile. I partially feel like half of these men are cheating just saying they are ENM so they don’t have to lie about being married….
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/25 04:54 PM
4

Being seen as good enough for sex and good enough for a long-term committed relationship are not the same things.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/25 02:22 PM
–

Princeton doesn’t have a medical school,
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 06:56 PM
–

Dudes just flat out lying about what they do. This man said he went to Princeton medical school.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 06:38 PM
–

Here I am again telling you all that if you’re going to lie about your job on a dating app, please pick something you can back up. Or at the very least do some research.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 05:16 PM
1

Do you think he told her about those feelings BEFORE he slept with her??
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/25 01:12 PM
1

succubus is crazy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:57 PM
12

I don’t want to be celibate forever, however if I don’t get a partner I will never, ever have sex again. I’d be..not okay with it…but I could definitely live with it. Get a good toy and I’m good to go. Sex is about the intimacy with your partner. I’d rather have actual intimacy with my partner than just raw o physical pleasure. Thankfully, both are possible. Just takes a little patience.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 04:03 AM
1

That’s what got them to come to our table for, what started out to be a fun chat. Then not so fun.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:46 AM
1

You’re assuming their reactions were related to the bag. They weren’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:39 AM
1

Ahhhh I see what you’re saying. Sure I guess that’s one way to look at the situation. But they were loud and aggressive and wrong. Really ruined my espresso martini/ceasar salad vibes. Let us drink in peace!!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:28 AM
1

Have you seen the new Daredevil? This is important to my analysis?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:22 AM
1

No the Birkin is fake. They were drunk idiots who don’t know when to leave shit alone. Then one had the nerve to get mad after my friend wouldn’t give him her number.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:17 AM
1

Irl! So frustrating!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:05 AM
1

lol! Was having a nice day then someone decided to be an idiot. It happens…especially in this political climate.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 03:00 AM
1

What’s SD?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 02:48 AM
1

Whew….these men are trying me today!!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 02:47 AM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 01:03 AM
1

Wait so you’re fine doing it to someone else?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:54 AM
1

Woman #1 doesn’t care. Woman #2 demands kids but with the stipulation above (that while pregnant and a few months post birth you get zero sex).
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:46 AM
1

Why is the cheating different in this case? So maybe you understand where woman #1 is coming from?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:43 AM
1

Wait humor me on the actual hypo though!! It’s just for funsies!
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:36 AM
1

Humor me on the marriage bit. Also is it stringing along is she’s banging other dudes??
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:30 AM
1

Not sure if this is too close to the n-count convo but this just popped into my head. For men that think sex is the end all/be all for a relationship (or anyone who wants to answer) which would you rather have: A partner that treats you well, shows your respect, sees to your needs both emotionally and physically as best they can. She enjoys being physical with you, the sex is great, she is physically attracted to you, genuinely likes you, has whatever domestic qualities you want in a partner. Ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/25 12:22 AM
1

It’s still just sex. Orgasms are good. But as a woman it’s mostly about technique/ style and frequency. Make me have three in a short time period, I’m gonna melt. All of this is stuff that can be learned as you explore with your partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 10:02 PM
1

I do think this is something anyone can say. Even a virgin knows wine sex is bad. “Visceral” guys it’s sex…not some magical thing. I think men have unrealistic expectations about the female orgasm. You want to be her best partner? Make her have more than one orgasm.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/04/25 09:44 PM
–

And making those sacrifices wont make you happy in the long run when you get tired of making them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 05:33 PM
1

No, but there’s not really any other way you can take it. We had a post the other day saying that women need to give men constructive criticism about why they aren’t attractive - this, not matter how politely it’s put, will be taken as rude. I am seeing this the same way. Someone his on you, you say no, and reasoning after that no is going to sting more. Now, I do think friends/acquaintances should be giving advice beyond “got to the gym and shower”, but I’m going to be honest, ad a woman that’s…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/04/25 05:33 PM
1

I’m saying that voice notes are for exclusively for non-urgent situations. Because, unlike a phone call, they don’t require you both to be actively participating. But it’s for longer more detailed convos than a text. I like them. Especially when I’m talking to a new guy or don’t feel like FaceTiming .
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:43 PM
1

And that’s where you’re getting in your own way. You’re so worried about being rejected or being alone forever that you’re pushing people away before they can get close now. You’re not even giving people a chance to like you. No one is going to like you if you’re outwardly miserable and mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:30 PM
1

It’s like a telephone call and a text in one. It’s not for emergencies. I personally use it for situations that are too long to text. That way I don’t have to wait for my friend to be free to tell her about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:29 PM
1

How do telephones work? It’s kinda like that!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:21 PM
2

Just stay at home and save up. Shits too expensive right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:21 PM
1

What about the second part of what I asked?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:20 PM
2

You should try again. Put it this way, if you met a woman with your attitude, but aimed towards men, would you want to date her?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:19 PM
2

Just meet in person?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:18 PM
1

Wait are you like a kid?? How old are you?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:17 PM
–

I’ve asked this many times but what women do you know? What age group are they? I don’t know a single woman who has ZERO hobbies. I can’t name a single woman who doesn’t have at least some domestic skill or some traditionally feminine skill.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:14 PM
–

What does taking accountability look like for men vs women?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:09 PM
3

Yeah I’d tell them to go get professional help. You might just need professional help with your depression and trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:05 PM
–

This is a lie men with influenced wives tell themselves to feel better. That woman is working.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 05:03 PM
1

I’m not telling you to change your mindset to get women. I’m telling you to change your mindset so you’re not miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 04:58 PM
1

But you don’t have to die miserable.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:45 PM
3

Do you think being hateful and mean is helping your cause? The women you are around now aren’t the same ones that didn’t notice you when you were younger. You are carrying baggage from you past and telegraphing it onto anyone you could possibly meet in the future. You need to deal with your trauma and get past it. Or else you really will die miserable and alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:38 PM
1

So would you guys rather people just were needlessly mean? You might not ever find anyone. You might be single forever. Women that struggle to date have the same issue..the only reason they can “overcome” it is because men are horny.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:37 PM
5

And how is that working out for you? You’re getting in your own way. No one will ever want to go on a date with you if you’re this hateful.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:34 PM
6

Dude, maybe you’re single because you’re not a good person? Do you think that finding joy in the suffering of others makes people want to date you? Like you literally made two people lose any sympathy for you in the span of one message. You being single may just be an indicator that you, as a person, need to change.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:13 PM
2

Then you’d still be a virgin? With literally no hope of ever not being a virgin.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:09 PM
–

Hahah! I get that. Start simple, get some low sodium lawrys, onion powder, garlic powder, and some kinders garlic butter. I actually don’t season with regular salt unless I’m making steak. Other times I’m using season blends.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:08 PM
–

Then that’s honestly most of it. Just play around with stuff. Everything’s not going to turn out perfect but once you learn what flavors go together you can have fun with it. If recommend braising things if you don’t mind having the oven running. I’m anti-crock pot or instant pot, but those work too! And you don’t have to stand.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 03:04 PM
–

Do you enjoy cooking and just not have the skills?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 02:57 PM
–

Oh got it. You’re just saying words.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 02:12 PM
–

Yeah women are the ones with loneliness epidemic. You’re right!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 02:03 PM
–

Says the man calling women liars for wearing shoes?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 02:02 PM
–

Is she…okay? That’s a little strange for any adult. I was more talking about t someone who can’t make meals that taste good. Not someone that cant make edible food.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 02:00 PM
–

Oh no, women have standards, the horror.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:58 PM
–

My guy, if you look at a woman and see she’s wearing heels, then call her a liar for wearing heels, that’s crazy. Why would someone be mad about this? Went out with a woman who said she was 5’2 and she showed up wearing obvious heels, standing at 5’6???
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:58 PM
–

Tell men this!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:50 PM
–

Heels are lying!!! Shaving is lying??? If a man is shocked when I take off my platform heels or that I’m not actually hairless I’m going to assume he’s an idiot.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:48 PM
–

I think being able to cook well is a skill so many people take for granted. I think so many men especially feel like cooking is simple and anyone can throw flavors together to make a great meal. Some people just don’t have the skill and patience to do anything more advanced than dressing up jarred pasta sauce and boiling some spaghetti. Hell, for some people, they won’t even dress it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:46 PM
–

Q4M that is want a traditional wife/partner: Would you be upset if she wasn’t good at cooking? Like let’s say she did cook. But the food was dry or otherwise not well prepared. It doesn’t make you sick, but it’s definitely not the best in terms of flavor. I was talking about this with some friends the other day. One guy said he wouldn’t want to be the guy whose wife wasn’t allowed to cook anything for get togethers.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/04/25 01:35 PM
2

See, any time I come across a guy that has something like “don’t want a pen pal” he has always just wanted to jump straight to physical stuff. No matter what they looked like. Maybe it’s something about that particular string of words that just actually means something else? I’m happy to meet up in person to chat, I actually prefer it. But I just need to check off a few things to make sure no one is wasting time.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/25 02:10 AM
2

I wouldn’t show my dumpy on dating apps. I am notorious for putting older pics on my profile from when I was heavier. It turns into a usually pleasant surprise, and I get see if the guy treats me differently than he did when we were chatting online. It’s just so frustrating. I don’t want them all, no. But the dating game better be worth the work.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/25 02:08 AM
3

Q4M: how do you want the initial conversation on a dating app to go? I’ve gotten commentary that I’m too serious. Too jokey. Too conversational (this one was just a guy looking to hookup). What the hell do you want women to ask you about? I can’t ask you about some, what you’re reading or what you’re doing on weekends??! What do you want?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/25 01:50 AM
–

If an “I hate men” woman finds one she likes then she is definitely treating him right.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 03:20 PM
1

I think this would be an okay reasoning if servers were paid more. They aren’t. Even if the service is not exceptional tipping 15% is kinda needed so the the servers can continue working that job.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 12:14 PM
1

What? Unless you only date one person and that person dies or you die, then the only other way relationships end is via rejection. The type of rejection is what varies.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 02:57 AM
1

It’s bizarre!!
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:44 AM
2

Were these the wives/girlfriends of these men? And maybe that’s how your family does things. I know my dad would have been in that convo calling women fat and lazy, blaming their unhappiness with men on those factors. I don’t think this is a “moment representative of the US as a whole” at all. Plus you kinda made it seem like the men were just sitting there…waiting for permission from the women to act. Maybe they know the women at the table were combative and just didn’t want to engage?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:41 AM
1

Were these the wives/girlfriends of these men? And maybe that’s how your family does things. I know my dad would have been in that convo calling women fat and lazy, blaming their unhappiness with men on those factors. I don’t think this is a “moment representative of the US as a whole” at all. Plus you kinda made it seem like the men were just sitting there…waiting for permission from the women to act. Maybe they know the women at the table were combative and just didn’t want to engage?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:41 AM
9

With maybe a few exceptions, men don’t even really want to be garbage men. You think, there are men out there whose life goal it is to be garbage men? But for what it’s worth, like 13% of sanitation workers are female. A better industry to use would be plumbers and pipe fitters, those are only like 1.8% - but the industry is largely male and still based on apprenticeships. There’s a lack of that for women that are interested - so there are no safety nets for when the men inevitably push back. I …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:37 AM
1

Changed the conversation from what to what?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:27 AM
1

I’ve come across three in the last month. One today was a live that explicitly asked “who should matter more”? And I would not be surprised if this start getting traction in the next few weeks here.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:26 AM
1

It does matter when what he’s saying is not going to work for them. He’s grifting. Taking a vulnerable population and exploiting it. You wanna know how to appeal to women? I’ll tell you for free. Make yourself attractive. For some men, that takes money: but know that if you lose the money you lose the women. For some men it takes looks: get a woman interested enough and she might stick around when the looks fade. But unless you have a LOT of either of those things to offer (and are okay with a w…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:25 AM
5

The guys liked him, he had a (seemingly) good family. His kids were my age and I was in a lot of the same classes as his daughter. He was kind but still garnered respect from both the students and the teachers. He made sure everyone was accountable for their actions when anything bad happened. Even when it came to a bad grade, he dissuaded making excuses and encouraged everyone to focus on improvement when tackling issues. Oh, I forgot this he used to be a gymnast! He had this way of taking some…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:19 AM
1

Has anyone else been seeing a weird amount of discourse trying to make women choose between their children and their husbands/partners? Thoughts on it? I’ve been seeing so many discussions all centered basically around the premise of “who should take priority in a relationship?” it seems like the manosphere is moving from making women choose between her partners wants or her own, to making her choose her children’s wants or her partners. Personally, I think the necessities your children should c…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:10 AM
1

What what do you mean? They sat and ate quietly or didn’t eat until the women were done?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:03 AM
2

Andrew Tate being a role-model for incels is so laughable. He’s not an incel. He’s happy to throw money at women. And he hasn’t struggled with women in so long, I don’t really think he understands what his tactics do for the average guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 01:02 AM
3

Maybe this is location based . Outside of college, every male teacher I had had a wife and kids. In high school specifically I had the wrestling coach, the football coach and the resident hunter (he was known for it) in three different classes. The hunter taught psychology and sociology. He was a relay good role model for all the guys too: super nice! Even my orchestra teacher was weirdly masculine in my opinion…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 12:59 AM
1

Seen elsewhere: women who hate men’s do so because men can and do hurt women. Men hate women because women don’t offer them enough sex. Thoughts??
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 12:47 AM
15

If there are women that can meet the standards why not put them in areas where there is risk/uncomfortable lifestyle. The military doesn’t and shouldn’t let in men that can’t meet certain standards to special ops positions. So what if there’s only one or two women that can meet those same standards - them having a vagina should not bar them from performing that role. If the US ever has to enact a draft, people are stupid if they think they won’t draft women. The US military is one of the largest…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/25 12:36 AM
2

Flattered that you think I’m getting rejected mainly by conventionally attractive men. I had a 5’4 guy tell me after three dates that he couldn’t date me because of my religious background….and that was after he spent a week making sure I was “okay” with his height. The cheating thing is 18-29 women technically report having more extramarital affairs but it’s 11% vs 10% - https://ifstudies.org/blog/who-cheats-more-the-demographics-of-cheating-in-america (and I’d wager that 1 percent is filled wi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:50 PM
4

I like men. I’m attracted to men. I know that being attracted to a man will not make him a good partner for me. There are a few places I go where, if a man approaches, I know we have shared interest or some basis for some commonality. But outside of that, a random man coming up to me off the street would unlikely be a match. On the flip side, on dating apps if I get a match with a guy, I will almost always try to ask for a date or to meet for coffee. Because at least there’s a base there already…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:40 PM
0

I am part of a group of women deemed “least attractive/desirable” according to a lot of apps. And given my dating preference and pace, I’ve faced a lot of rejection head on and days or weeks after talking to someone. Still stings, but barring death - all relationships end due to some form of rejection. Men may face more direct rejection (mostly because they are the one asking out usually) but women definitely get rejected - what do you think ghosting is? Hell pumping and dumping? Cheating? Break…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:37 PM
1

wait she doesn’t like men and she’s tolerating an ugly one? For what reason? And I mean this foe the average couple, not some rich millionaire who just happens to be unfortunate to look at. But if your claim is women don’t like men, what would be the appeal of dating an ugly man?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:31 PM
7

So just because i don’t want to be bothered by random men who I likely have no interest in, it means I don’t like men?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:29 PM
4

Rejection is a part of dating. It happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:27 PM
1

Wait I thought it you said that women aren’t attracted to men? But now plenty of ugly men are in relationships?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/04/25 11:26 PM
7

When men say anything about their testosterone levels in an attempt to excuse poor behaviors, I am going to start telling them that they are acting hormonal.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 11:39 PM
1

Are you guys really dating women that only go down on you on special occasions?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 10:31 PM
0

Guys don’t talk to their male friends that same way they talk to their female friends. I honestly think that’s where the problem lies. He gets the warm fuzzies because she’s listening to his issues, being sympathetic, being open to hearing about his problems and not just shrugging them off with a “damn that’s tough, buddy”. He starts to compare his female friends to his male friend and find a deeper connection there and it turns into romantic feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 10:26 PM
1

No one is ever going to get exactly what they wanted. Settling is taking something you’d rather not have and dealing with it. Like if you really want ice cream: your favorite ice cream is Rocky road or mint chocolate. You go to get ice cream but they don’t have either flavor: so you settle for vanilla. It’s ice cream - what you wanted - but it’s not satisfying because it doesn’t have the qualities you want. Someone else, might just forego ice cream if they don’t have any flavors they really like…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 06:49 PM
-1

Which doesn’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 05:57 PM
-1

Maximal attraction to your partner does not make you happy with your partner. All else equal, people prefer to feel respected and loved by their partner does
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 05:01 PM
-2

But also because no one will ever get exactly what they want. Even if the wrapping is nice the contents of the present might be disappointing. Having a successful relationship requires more than an attractive partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 04:42 PM
–

So if you’re not getting the fidelity or sex you want then you are valid to leave that relationship. We agree. Sure we don’t need fidelity..but I want it. Just like I want a satisfying sex life with my partner. If im not getting it I will leave. At least with unsatisfying sex I will try to fix it before exiting the relationship, but if my partner does not want to be faithful then I’m going to assume it means he doesn’t want to be my partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/04/25 01:44 PM
–

Are you Muslim?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 09:45 PM
–

Because men having sex uncontrollably does not benefit society. Babies everywhere - no man to take care of them during a time where women were incapable of working to care for themselves. Plus it was just an excuse for men to just get their dicks wet and not be faithful to their wives who they were leaving for months or years on end.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 09:43 PM
–

How is that different from what the other peppers on said. You’re basically saying the same things, if you can’t get a partner organically, just accept that you might not ever have it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 09:34 PM
–

What does this mean? Are you married?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 09:29 PM
5

This is so weird to me as a woman. From very early on we are kinda taught to be critical of our bodies because of fashion trends and stuff like that. But even unfashionable women can look in the mirror to see what looks good or what doesn’t. Look at the men around you that are good with women. See how they dress. Look at the men that are dating the kind of women you’re attracted too, dress like them. Look at yourself critically: you should be able to see the flaws and at least address them.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 08:56 PM
13

Why do women need to tell you why? Why are people not interested in you obligated to help you fix yourself?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 08:42 PM
–

Being the smallest she ever had doesn’t mean you’re small though. Maybe she’s a size queen.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 08:37 PM
2

I’m pretty sure, based on her response, they have an open relationship, not average at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 06:52 PM
1

No they definitely come from real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 06:48 PM
1

Do you think it was 50%? 30%? 10%?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 06:39 PM
1

Do you think 100% of women have even been asked about this? 50% where are they getting this number from?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 06:14 PM
2

Your entire premise is wrong because most women do not have rape fantasies. And even if some women do have rape fantasies men have no way of knowing which women do. Plus, men are missing the entire point that fantasies are not real. The only reason rape fantasies have any appeal is that they are fake and 100% controlled by the person having the fantasy. And most women with rape fantasy are not fantasizing about a violent rape. They are fantasizing about being forced to enjoy sex and then that se…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 05:00 PM
2

The entire thing about rape is the lack of consent and exerting your own will against someone else regardless of their wants. Even if there’s not actual violence involved (like in drugging someone) there’s still someone exerting their will over another just because they can. If rape was just about sex it wouldn’t exist,..men would just pay to go have sex with someone. Sex workers get raped. It’s not just about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 04:29 PM
1

Are women not cuddling their boyfriends whenever they get a chance??!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 03:32 PM
0

Unless you think men are doing it because they think women will enjoy it then your point doesn’t stand. They would rape women regardless of the fantasies women have. Because actual rape isn’t about just having sex, it’s about asserting your strength and power over someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 03:13 PM
0

So you think they are altruistically raping women???
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 02:58 PM
1

You’re saying rape culture is fueled by women’s rape fantasy. Do you think that because men know that some women have a rape fantasy that they think it’s okay to force themselves on women? Men don’t rape out of an altruistic need to help women get their desires met. Women having rape fantasies is a direct reaction to how women have been socialized about sex for years. It’s something that’s done to you. It’s something dirty that you shouldn’t enjoy. I’m pretty sure that the women that have rape f…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 02:51 PM
1

Again, I meant to reply originally to a comment where a man was stating that he wants to have sex with as many women as possible and marry a woman who had a low-n count. That man does not care about body count, he would fuck any woman that lets him. This entire convo was because I said that I think it’s stupid that he’s willing to ruin a woman, in his own eyes, when he thinks casual sex is damaging to women. This graph you shared also says that men with fewer partners have a rate of happier marr…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/25 01:36 AM
1

I’m not parroting equality rhetoric. Unless you are saying (now I’m talking to you) that you think sex is literally damaging to women in a way that it’s not to men. That’s crazy. We are not different creatures, we are just different genders: me saying having consensual sex at high rates can be equally damaging to both men and women is true. Now the extent of the damage is up for debate. I personally think that anyone that is capable of having and enjoying lots of casual sex wouldn’t be a good fi…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 11:25 PM
1

You can literally google and find something saying the earth is flat doesn’t mean it’s true. And I’m not talking about YOU! Personally! I’m saying you as in the general you. When I say “if you’re a man that thinks xyz” I’m not saying specifically about you. Just in general, in my opinion men that think sex ruins women but continue to strive to get sex with lots of women while not marrying them, then you’re a hypocrite. Men love whores! Men love women that want to have wild crazy sex with them. S…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 10:50 PM
1

I’m not making the claim. Please link me to actual studies and not Imgur pics. Or at least an abstract stating methodology. How would a study even accurately measure marital happiness? If sluts are damaged men that are sluts are also damaged. And if you’re a man that thinks having sex damages women, then your goal should not be to damage as many women as possible. And promiscuity in women does not give men the ick because they will still fuck them. Some men would even cheat on, or leave their lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 09:44 PM
2

Medium ugly to be precise.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 06:35 PM
1

Do we live in an area where there are no mechanics? For me knowing or not knowing anything about cars is neutral. I don’t think it’s a green flag for me because my default it just going to take my car to someone to get it fixed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 06:34 PM
2

Personally I would not consider a coffee date a “date”. If you want a chill first meeting to see if we click then that’s great. But meeting for coffee is only that’s: meeting for coffee to see if we want to do invest more time/money into one another. But it’s definitely more a precursor to a date than an actual date in my opinion. It’s low cost on both parties. I’m not getting super dressed up like I would for a date date: and this isn’t me saying you have to spend money for a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 06:13 PM
2

I somehow replied to the wrong poster. The guy I had meant to reply to said that he was someone who wanted to have a lot of sexual partners but wouldn’t marry a woman who had a lot of sexual partners because that means she’s a bad partner. If you’re a man that thinks women having sex makes them less desirable for long term relationships - and logically actual love and commitment - then they would have to think that having lots of sex does something to women to make her undesirable. To still want…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/04/25 06:04 PM
2

My family paid for my healthcare? I didn’t have free healthcare in school because my parents had healthcare through work. My parents never had any gov aid when I was growing up. They are top 10% earners. The only reason I ever had to pay for my own college was because I messed up my first year and they wouldn’t pay after…after that I paid for everything myself, worker and got my scholarship after taking summer classes to up my GPA. And me making more than the average person is important because …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 01:33 PM
2

I never said I worked a part time student job. I worked full time my last two years after getting a paid corporate internship my second year..:I was lucky enough to be able to take evening and line classes so that I could work full-time and go to school. And I had merit scholarships to cover the rest when I was only working part-time (still in the corporate world actually) my first two years. Now I make more than the average salary for men in the US. Men did not pay for my college and based on y…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 12:47 PM
2

I think this somehow posted to the wrong comment. I was replying to something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 10:18 AM
1

I’ve also given gifts to men and seen other women give gifts to men that the men enjoyed. One guy loved fountain pens so I got him this expensive ink in his favorite color. He had ink from this brand but never bought anything from their luxury line. Another guy enjoyed gaming, so I got him the gaming chair he’d had his eye on and the newest game in a series he liked. My friend got her husband this limited edition pair of shoes from his favorite brand. For Christmas she got him an at home cooking…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 03:55 AM
1

Not at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 02:01 AM
2

How? I also receive gifts from women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 02:01 AM
–

It’s so weird that for one group of guys I regularly attract tall doctors/lawyers/finance bros but for everyone else I’m lucky to get someone that knows the difference between “your” and “you’re”. It’s kinda flabbergasting…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 12:10 AM
6

This is the dumbest mindset to have. “I want to fuck women with low body counts because I think women having sex with men ruins them…but I also want to ruin a lot of women by having sex with them.”
/r/PurplePillDebate16/04/25 12:02 AM
3

I don’t think all women are terrible gift givers.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 11:59 PM
0

This is not the norm. Most men are not going to be okay with what you and your friends were okay with.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 11:55 PM
11

All men certainly do not value education. Nor do they pay for it for everyone else. I had no idea the hours I worked in college to foot the bill for my education that merit scholarships didn’t cover were actually paid for by men. That’s amazing! When do I get my money back?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 11:52 PM
4

And most people aren’t well-read and knowledgeable. That’s the point people forget.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 11:50 PM
6

I have. I’ve seen more messy guys rooms than women’s rooms. And that’s as a messy woman myself. But I still clean weekly and for company. I just don’t have the compulsive need to have everything perfect all the time. I’ve only ever met one woman id consider messier than myself. In my experience it’s way more common for men to just..not clean. And not even they just sent good at it. They just don’t really clean. I tend to try to date men that are much neater than me,‘because then they appreciate …
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 10:09 PM
6

I was more focusing on actually being in people’s homes/personal areas and how they keep something they are required to clean themselves. I’ve worked in a restaurants but exclusively high-end places.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 08:40 PM
–

No. If a guy tells me he goes to the gym every single days it’s honestly kind of a turnoff.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 08:23 PM
9

Where do you get this idea?? I’ve been in way more messy guys bathrooms than I have messy women’s.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 08:20 PM
1

It’s not that I’m not comfortable with them, I just don’t think I need to kiss every guy/hug every guy I see myself going on a second or third date with. I’m an affectionate person for sure, but it’s definitely only for people I actually…you know feel affection for.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 10:27 AM
1

After the first date? You don’t need a kiss to know you liked someone after the first time you meet them. Of course I can hug someone and cuddle after a few dates, but I think the expectation of full-on physical intimacy basically right away is kind of extreme.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/04/25 02:19 AM
-1

Because people have their own boundaries. How long would you wait for a woman to have sex with you? Be honest? What’s the reasonable amount of time before you move on? Would you make her your girlfriend? Marry her first?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 11:48 PM
1

How does an acquaintance know you well and is already fond of you? I don’t see how this doesn’t limit your dating pools to just friends. How many people do you know well and are fond of that your aren’t friends with?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 09:51 PM
-1

Women cannot dictate terms of someone else’s perceived physical boundaries though. If they perceive a woman waiting x amount of time as “dragging them along” or “not being truly interested” that’s what’s going to happen. With any man, if he meets a woman that’s willing to be physical with him faster, he is going to probably gravitate to her a little more. But I’ve personally lost out on guys who felt like they didn’t want to wait…whether it was because they had other options, or didn’t feel like…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 08:42 PM
1

What does that mean? You only date your friends?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 08:37 PM
0

There’s just this huge disconnect that cannot be fixed without some major changes on both sides. Either: Men must change the way they talk about women having sex fast, frequency of sex she has or that sex negatively impacts women. This would take the longest because they’d have to undo centuries of sexual shame done to women. It also wouldn’t solve the underlying problem. Or Men just decenter sex in early dating phases. Who cares if one woman is willing to sleep with you the first night she need…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 08:23 PM
1

Plus, choosing someone based on how soon they have sex with you doesn’t make for good vetting criteria for men. You know very little about this woman: and sure most guys are thinking “well at least I had sex.” But those will be the same men foaming over divorce rates, gold-diggers and cheating later on. Not saying it never works ad a metric, but for long term partner selection it’s a big risk.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 08:12 PM
0

This is not true at all. You’ve never had to tell a guy that you actually don’t know how long it will take for you to get comfortable enough to have sex with him, or watch him get disappointed that you wanted to wait.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:38 PM
1

The dick or the person? The one guy where I actually enjoyed sex (yet had zero orgasm) and had fun, I remember it was because of what he did and said, not because of his dick size.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:37 PM
4

This is not meant to be mean, but have you ever had sex before? Honest question? And if yes, do you rank all your partners?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:33 PM
4

Eh, I also have experienced the getting left for a much older woman (with a kid!) trope. And it’s lead me to believe this:some men hate single moms and older women until they fall in love with one. These men are dating women they have been told to like. Then they finally meet one they actually like - surprise she’s 5+ years older than him with a kid…suddenly they don’t care. Because they actually like the woman they are with for what might be the first time.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:26 PM
5

I think one of the less talked about issues issue with the dating world is that a LOT of relationships these days seem to start as hookups or casual flings. If you’re a woman not interested in casual sex, or not able to mentally handle the idea of casual/fun/ or whatever dating for whatever reasons, then it’s going to be harder to even attract a guy for long term. As weird as that sounds, I just don’t think current dating ideologies work for people that actually want to take it slow on the physi…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/04/25 07:16 PM
1

Yeah and celebrities that women fangirl over is a very small number of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 08:43 PM
1

I’m talking about that fact that you said you don’t see men fangirling over women. I think to date like 300 women who had only fans became multimillionaires, about 16K creators (the vast majority of them women)make about 500,000 per year. Given that OF has only been a popular platform for a few short years, you have to consider how that kind of growth is even possible at all. Men are throwing dollars at these women in droves. They are fangirling.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 05:54 PM
3

I disagree, men “fangirl” all the time. Remember all those guys being that one OF models bath-water? How many women become millionaires in months just by being attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/04/25 05:33 PM
1

So are we denying that you said most women deserve to be pumped and dumped?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 09:12 PM
1

Is being pumped and dumped positive or negative?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 05:33 PM
2

You said most women deserved to be pumped and dumped…what’s the pumping part of that entail?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 05:15 PM
1

So having sex with men is a punishment..got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 04:55 PM
1

I’m not in a LTR right now because I had to break it off with a guy after four dates? That’s definitely stopping me from dating in my opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 04:21 PM
1

Hmm I think you might just be trying to nitpick an experience. It’s shitty it happened. But it’s definitely come up enough times where it’s made me be cautious.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 04:00 PM
1

For real. He really couldn’t see why I didn’t want to take that risk too.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:47 PM
1

Let me rephrase: “stopping me from being in an LTR”.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:46 PM
0

Then how is it cognitive distortion?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:35 PM
0

This. I also don’t feel like I’m going to be the woman that magically has everything he needs to stop him from cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:35 PM
1

Why not apply! Always apply and let them tell you no.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:26 PM
-1

How can you make that comment when it’s happened to me?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:18 PM
1

I agree!
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:06 PM
2

Yes. One guy said he’d never thas much dating experience outside of his ex…who he was with for years. The other guy said he didn’t get much experience until college and he cheated on all of his LTRs basically…and told me he did it the first time because he felt like he’d “missed out”.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 03:05 PM
2

One thing that’s stopping me from dating is the amount of guys who, after not having “options” and finally getting a partner end up cheating on that partner. It’s been weirdly common for a couple of the guys I’ve talked to. I even had to break off a fourth date with someone who told me he cheated on his ex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/04/25 02:50 PM
1

Some offense but the person I was replying to actually said that they thought the fetish meant the person liked them. Fetish is different from general attraction. A fetish is also linked to something that’s not usually sexual, that’s the entire point of why fetishes towards races is dehumanizing and degrading. Women are not sexually attracted to money. Some women will be more willing to have sex with someone (despite not enjoying the sex or being turned on) because they know it will let them kee…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/04/25 02:35 PM
3

Fetish does not mean they like you, it means they get sexual pleasure from the idea of doing something with you. And it doesn’t have anything to do with you…just qualities that, if found on another person, would also turn them on. Examples i once had a guy say that he loved the idea of hooking up with a certain type of woman because it was so “naughty and excitin. He couldn’t want to try it out”. I wasn’t even a person to him, just - just a thing he wanted to try out to get off.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/04/25 12:09 PM
3

Trust me. No 19 year old is dating a broke, loser 40 year old. (Or one they consider broke) No matter how hot he is. I’m not saying she doesn’t like him. But I am saying she probably wouldn’t be dating him if she had to fund his lifestyle or take care of him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 08:31 PM
14

It’s because she’s 19 and thinks $33 an hour is a great wage. When I was 19 I dated a guy because I thought him having his own apartment was a mark of his maturity (not the only reason) but it gave him an advantage over guys my age who lived at home or in dorms.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/25 08:19 PM
3

And again, you’re going to be disappointed when kids don’t create whatever feeling you’re looking for.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/25 12:09 AM
3

Do you have kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:58 PM
3

The greater purpose of what? What if your kids are the causes of your lows?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:52 PM
2

Are the only things keeping you committed to your partner children?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:39 PM
2

What if you’re not into non-monogamy and actually enjoy spending time with your spouse and watching them grow and change as time passes?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:28 PM
3

I never said they didn’t have a relationship. I just said they weren’t married. Can two people not raise a child together while not being married? Do you only stay faithful to your partner because you’re married to them? Do married people not cheat? Are married people never bad parents? What part of having a two parent household is unfortunate?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:22 PM
5

Of what? You don’t need to be married to have a kid. You don’t even need to be married to have a two-parent household. What if your kid dies? What if you find yourself infertile? Are you just gonna be done?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:18 PM
13

Have you ever actually been in love before? With someone that loved you back? Do you think familial love also waxes and wanes? There are tons of issues with your premise. Hedonism doesn’t exist just because you’re not having kids. A married couple can be happy simply just being together, enjoying life together. Kids should not be the cement to your relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:13 PM
13

Is the love of your life worth so little to you? That you’d consider them nothing?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 11:07 PM
1

So then why swipe on everyone?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 10:55 PM
1

Q4M that day guys swipe with every woman on dating apps because they need to pad the numbers in their favor because they have so few options: Why don’t you then have a conversation with every woman that matches with you? If the options are so scarce you have to swipe on anyone, wouldn’t you have better luck getting what you’re looking for if you talked to everyone that you matched with?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/25 10:23 PM
2

Cooking for someone is based? I just enjoy it lol!
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/25 12:30 AM
1

Is based good or bad! Asking for a millennial?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 08:16 PM
2

Girl, my old roommate would literally have me cook for her bf because she could make like 2 things. I taught her how to make his favorite dish and they were so thankful they paid my rent the last month of our lease lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 08:05 PM
1

Yeah but they still appreciate good food especially when they can’t cook well, or don’t enjoy cooking. And most men in their 30s still appreciate someone cooking for them. Hell most people in their 30s appreciate it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 08:04 PM
1

I like when people enjoy my food and become happy from the food I cook. If I was a bad cook it probably wouldn’t be the same .
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 08:03 PM
1

I enjoy cooking for my friends too! I will literally stop and make them a random dinner if they want it. I just see my roomie cooking for her bf….hes always so happy…I just wanna do that too. Last guy I cooked for didn’t appreciate it so I stopped doing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:57 PM
3

I enjoy cooking for my friends too! I will literally stop and make them a random dinner if they want it. I just see my roomie cooking for her bf….hes always so happy…I just wanna do that too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:56 PM
1

I’ll try that out! I already cook very well, but I think a class would be fun either way!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:55 PM
2

Yes I would. Maybe not until marriage, but I definitely wouldn’t mind being patient while he got comfortable. I’m gonna be doing the same thing!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:52 PM
2

I just want a boyfriend to cook for. Food is my love language and I swear I just wanna make a man a reverse seared steak with chimmichurri fries and roasted broccoli rabe after his super stressful day at work. Or his super good day at work. No matter what that meal will be the best part of his day. It’s not the same cooking for my roommate.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:49 PM
1

That’s what I thought but recently I’ve had to explain that I’m not on there just for hookups. I don’t even have any revealing pics.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 07:46 PM
–

Blank doesn’t work for me. I tried it and got only men looking for causal. I think I need someway to signify that I don’t have a “type” of man because I’m thinking some of these guys are making assumptions .
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 04:17 PM
–

And I don’t want the other things on their own. So how should I signify that without saying it outright?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 04:15 PM
–

I don’t think it happens but I do think it’s talked about as if it happens a lot. I think the “two boyfriends”/cuckold thing is a response to it. Some men pretend not to understand why women are hurt when they hear men say that they are happiest with multiple partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 04:15 PM
–

Like going on dates, getting to know someone, having fun getting to know someone, maybe falling in love and doing something stupid like getting married one day.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 04:13 PM
–

Push back against men fighting to have multiple female partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 03:56 PM
–

30+ Men of PPD. What should I put in my dating profile to signal to men that I’m actually interested in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 03:55 PM
–

Or more likely “I’m dominate”.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 01:36 PM
–

He gonna be mad as hell when his kids come out 5’10.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 12:13 PM
–

Men please stop mentioning your sex drive in your dating profiles. No woman is going to be like “ohh high sex drive! What a green flag!”
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/25 12:12 PM
1

The vegan thing for me is because I love love love to cook! And most of the things I make have some animal byproduct. I’d want to enjoy meals with my partner and not have to cook two separate meals or completely change my eating habits. The cat thing is just because men with more than one cat always seems to have some…quirks. The except is if a guy has own cat that kinda just wandered into his life. Bu once it’s more than one cat…something just gets weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:28 PM
1

I’m pretty forgiving about most things. There are a few items that would instantly turn me off from someone. Some of them make sense - political and social views for example. Others, I will admit, might seem petty - like I will not date vegans or men with cats.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:19 PM
3

He already knew I wasn’t interested in sleeping with him right away. If people can’t handle others having blurring concerning their own sex lives and intimacy then maybe they shouldn’t be dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:05 PM
2

No yeah. And it was shitty because we had a great time. Like I was really looking forward to that second date even before the first ended. I just cannot win.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 08:04 PM
3

I didn’t reject him. I just said I’d prefer not to go to his house after we just met. We had already planned a second date.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:54 PM
3

Yeah, for me. Because I don’t know the time it’s going to take for me to get comfortable even being physical with a guy, a man that has sex (with me) so far at the forefront of his brain that he’d would ask even after we’d already discussed intentions is a no go. Sex is important. But boundaries are more so.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:54 PM
2

I do especially since I told him I wasn’t into hookups or short term. I understand that quick sex doesn’t mean short term..but quick sex also doesn’t mean long term. Like given that we talked about it previously, I think his reaction was terrible.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:48 PM
4

That’s so stupid. Sorry I don’t feel comfortable going to get naked with a stranger I met two hours ago.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:45 PM
1

I can’t enjoy sex without emotional intimacy. So for me the idea is never appealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:44 PM
2

Fuck if I know! And I actually really really liked him.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:42 PM
3

I didn’t reject him. He asked me if I wanted to go back to his place after a first date. I said no.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:42 PM
3

It was a first date mind you.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:35 PM
-2

Men shot themselves in the foot by making prostitution so stigmatized. It’s literally all some of them want. They want to spend xyz dollars and have sex be dispensed out to them at the end.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:25 PM
3

He said, “you shouldn’t have accepted the date if you knew you weren’t interested in me” when I declined going home with him at the end of the night.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:23 PM
6

Me: tells man I’m not interested in short term dating. Man: tells me he’s not interested in short term and wants something real. We go on a date. Man at end of date: why did you let me take you out if you knew you weren’t going to sleep with me? I’m just gonna be single.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/03/25 07:17 PM
12

If you consider yourself very attractive, but can only attract average or below partners- you’re probably not very attractive. If you consider yourself to have a bubbly and friendly personality - but other people call you loud and abrasive, you are probably loud and abrasive.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 10:52 PM
10

Your social skills are what make people determine your personality. Just like your “level” is what the gender you’re trying to date says it is, your personality is what others perceive it to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/03/25 10:27 PM
1

I’m a woman…I suppose it’s probably extremely easy, so long as I don’t care about safety or comfort.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 11:57 PM
4

Aren’t phobias irrational by definition? Maybe this might be a symptom of men worrying so much about finding love they essentially make themselves unable to do so. You don’t give any solid examples of what you think the differences actually are in how men vs women love. Can you elaborate a little bit?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/03/25 08:47 PM
–

That sentence incites so much rage in me for some reason. That and “women should be fit, feminine and sweet”
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:52 PM
–

…my god.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:43 PM
–

I feel like the term “very casual” makes it seem like he doesn’t want the f part of the benefits.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:42 PM
–

I’m just happy he had it in his profile so I didn’t waste any time
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:40 PM
–

Today’s dating app bullshit: “looking for something very casual but thoughtful…”
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:33 PM
8

Just because you aren’t attracted to them doesn’t mean you consider them to be ugly. There’s a lot of men that I know are handsome, but I still wouldn’t date because they aren’t my type.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/25 04:01 AM
1

Because liberals in general tend to be more accepting of those that exist outside the norm. They could see him, without the woman-bashing conservative values, as a nice person, who may be short but is still a kind person. Conservatives tend to judge harshly on looks - especially those looks that are beyond control.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 07:30 PM
1

I disagree, I do think it’s more likely for conservative women to feel okay bashing someone based only on looks. It’s less okay in the liberal sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 04:27 PM
1

His teeth are terrible, true.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 04:25 PM
1

Honestly a little foundation and some dental work, he might clean up good. The mental issues would be an entirety different battle.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 04:16 PM
1

I disagree. I think there would be a lot more liberal-leaning women willing to give him a chance.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 04:14 PM
1

I think the conservative woman would mock him more, honestly. Just because he goes against their views of what a man should look like. It’s more likely for a liberal woman to not have that issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:51 PM
1

I can’t believe some people here think that he’d get less judgement from conservatives. They would eat him alive. The women wouldn’t even look at him.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:43 PM
1

Who do you think is more likely to date him: A conservative woman who is 5’6 A liberal woman who is 5’6 Take away his terrible views on women and society for a second. And really think about which of these women would be more open to a 5’3 man.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:42 PM
1

I disagree, liberals tend to be more welcoming of those that upset gender norms. This man is a traditional conservative. He has traditional values. You really think men that fit into and follow those values won’t see him as an oddity? But either way, my point still is that this mindset makes no sense. Especially because someone else pointed out that he’s shorter than the average woman. Him being traditionally conservative with the views he was spouting about women does not make any sense to me. …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:33 PM
1

Do you have sources for this or is it made up? But to your last point - she’s bigger than him, the genders roles are already broken.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:15 PM
1

I wouldn’t date a man I wasn’t attracted to. I would date a 5’3 man. But a 6’5 man with reprehensible views is still reprehensible, but at least the reason he thinks like that makes sense: he’s had much easier access to the world. And the world was kinda built for him to succeed in it professionally and romantically.. A 5’3 American man, who had likely been bullied and judged, just for being 5’3, who then chooses an ideology where he can bully and judge others based on their looks or gender or b…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:13 PM
1

It just doesn’t seem to mesh. I stated before, he seems to be going after women that are taller than him. And the brief glimpse of him I had didn’t reveal to many good qualities. It didn’t seem like he was traditionally conservatives because he actually values home and family, but more so that that lifestyle is a means to making a woman respect him. Like he was hung up on the idea of submission and respect.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 03:04 PM
1

No no, he’s not allowed to looks down on me as a person. I’d never date a traditionally conservative man because of their views. Their views on women and women’s place in society are part of what I detest about them. I would date a 5’3 man. But a 5’3 man that hold the view that women are lesser, weaker, and belong in the home just doesn’t sit well with me. Especially when he is actively pursuing women taller than him. Like sir, you want me to be submissive and sweet to you for what reason exactl…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:58 PM
–

But I don’t need a stool to reach the shelves. I’m fine with him being one or the other. Both just feels so wrong for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:53 PM
–

Maybe her husbands insurance doesn’t cover implants and he can’t afford it out of pocket.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:52 PM
–

Either or, it would be better. But both is too much. How are you going to look down on me as a woman when you literally can’t look down on me?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:52 PM
–

How are you going to be head of the household when you can’t even reach all the shelves in that household?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:51 PM
–

Came across a man that was 5’3 AND “traditionally conservative”…for some reason these two things don’t make sense together to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/03/25 02:38 PM
1

Imma try it!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:55 PM
2

Bumble
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:47 PM
1

I’d never invite anyone I just met online to my house. That’s so weird to me. It’s just as safe as inviting a stranger over to hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:40 PM
1

I mean it’s a first conversation. I wouldn’t invite anyone I just met to my house. Nor would I invite myself to theirs.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:37 PM
1

And I’m not shooting above my league. It just seems like guys don’t know how to start/keep a convo going. Even when I do get someone talking they can’t maintain it without saying something weird. The other day this guy was telling me about his boardgames and DnD campaign. He asked me my favorite game eventually, then he goes “im down to come over and play it with you sometime”. Why invite yourself to my house??
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:28 PM
1

It does not work.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:24 PM
1

If you don’t want to hear “hey how are you” as an opener on a dating app then what is better to start with?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/25 06:20 PM
–

The definition of rape has been changed to include men. I already stated how that was an unfair standard. I’m pretty sure the sexual offenses act is modern UK law. US laws are not based on any modern UK law.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 06:01 PM
–

Has there been a case brought by a man in the past that got dismissed? There was a huge issue for a long time in that rape laws couldn’t even be applied to men: anal sex was just seen as sodomy, and courts didn’t think that women could rape men. It’s a widely contested legal issue that’s still being repaired. They’d have to charge their assailants with something else like criminal assault and battery ir something like that if they weren’t in a court that took a more liberal view of the word. And…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 05:30 PM
–

Most states use the Model Penal Code, at least in part, Until 1980 the MPC defined it as “sexual intercourse with a female not his wife” by force or threat of severe harm (Model Penal Code, 1980, as cited in Tracy et al., 2012, p. 5. Despite the fact that the person you posted listed it as “non binding”, it was still heavily used when defining what rape was. A woman’s consent to marriage was seen as a consent to sex with her husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/03/25 02:50 AM
2

Does the article say that the guy has major issues before the woman started dating him?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 08:57 PM
0

I am mostly talking about the description of it as “easy mode”. Like it’s only “easy” because the market for this, for certain women, is going to be large. They don’t comment on the thousands of women that are forced into the lifestyle and can’t leave. They don’t consider the women who aren’t making money at all. They see the top 1% of OF and Instagram Models making bank off showing their random body parts and assume that all women have that ability.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 08:55 PM
1

This isn’t like someone buying drugs or something illegal, where buying itself leads to danger. This is men (because it’s by and large men) paying top dollar for something as mundane as socks! Just because they touched a woman’s skin. Just because they want access to a woman that badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 08:13 PM
2

Maybe men shouldn’t make it easy?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 07:47 PM
5

The original legal definition of rape included the modifier of “forcible penetration of a woman that was not his wife”. Which was extremely messed up.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 03:55 PM
1

Exactly! So many people are convinced they need to tie finances together, or live with a person to see what kind do partner they really are. You should NOT be combining finances until marriage (if marriage is a goal). It’s also extremely possible to understand how someone lives, wants to live and how they are willing to live, without moving in. Do I think this is the fix to all marriage issues? No. But it’s is possible that waiting until engagement to move in together can help couples actually t…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 03:54 PM
2

Personally, I’ve seen a lot of people in the last feee years get married. Almost all of them were a bit disappointed that nothing “changed” or on the flip side, they had more fights because they expected being married would just be easy since they were already doing It anyway. Marriage definitely is special. But I don’t think living together is the only way to gain detailed insight as to whether or not you two can be longterm partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 01:28 PM
2

If that’s the case the relationship was never going to last anyway!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 01:25 PM
2

You can test those things prior to moving in together though. You can see how your partner spends his money, how he keeps his home and what his other qualities are without living together.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 01:25 PM
3

I think the state of relationships and marriage would improve in America if couples did not live together prior to engagement or marriage. while marriage, unless fueled by religious reasons, marriage is just a declaration of love and government status change, I do think there is some expectation that it feel special and different (in a good way) after the wedding day. If you are worried about your partner having weird expectations, the focus prior to marriage, should be having real conversations…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/03/25 12:52 PM
1

Where is this idea that women never apologize coming from? Maybe it’s different for gen z but I have always found that women apologize too much! We’ll apologize for shit we didn’t even do. Much of the media aimed at women and girls growing up was critical. It told you that your dressed wrong, at the wrong thing, weighed too much, did your makeup wrong. Being critical of yourself and getting used to being criticized by others is part of the female experience, in my view.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 08:12 PM
1

Do you disagree? Have a different experience?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 04:58 PM
2

I don’t really agree but maybe it’s because of age differences or social differences. I have noticed that sometimes men don’t see women’s acceptance of their behavior and changing it as taking accountability. Like a woman will have a history of dating a man that was not good for her, and some people will use the fact that she got into the relationship at all against her. Despite the fact that she took steps to fix the patterns of behavior that led her into the bad relationship in the first place…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:54 PM
3

Perhaps this is an age thing? The women I know do point out their flaws, men too, but we are also older and have had more practice navigating relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:49 PM
2

Wait what? You think women never admit they were bad partners or never admit they were in a bad relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:46 PM
1

Dude, my dad said this the other day about his ex-girlfriend. And I looked at him and asked him what it meant. He said “if you don’t o wi you’re part of the problem!” Like men are quick to say women are an echo chamber but then forget they are parroting dating advice from other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:37 PM
0

At first glance, just from the picture no. But there is definitely some potential there. His style choices might not be the best for his build/faceshape. I think it’s something that could be fixable if he’s willing. From a substance standpoint, I find that his portrayal of his relationship wants and needs are a bit cringey. In its far, there is nothing wrong with what he said, but how he’s saying it is what’s getting me. All in all, I think with some fine tuning, if he wants it, this guy could g…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:31 PM
2

Can someone explain to me what is meant by “women don’t have/take accountability?” Can you provide examples with your explanation?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 03:27 PM
0

I know! I’m just saying that women are more likely to try to deal with their shit than men are.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 12:59 PM
1

Shared activities and achievement are the same things as emotional connection and shared experiences. There’s no difference. Women don’t just bond over the fucking air in the room, we bond because we have things in common that we enjoy
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 01:01 AM
12

This is normal relationship/dating stuff. Did you previously date a woman who never asked anything about you or checked up on you?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/03/25 12:58 AM
-1

So I don’t agree with this…but for the sake of an argument, couldn’t the same thing be said for women? If you don’t have the same interest as your friend groups, they won’t be friends with you. If you don’t have sex with a man, he won’t date you long term
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 09:33 PM
3

You literally said that women underrate their trauma. Would that be different than underestimating to you? Trauma dumping is the act of relating your past traumatic experiences without thinking about the impact if might have on the person you’re telling. Like if I just met you recently, it’s unlikely that I will be able to handle hearing details of how you were abused as a kid. Unless of course the setting are meeting in is specifically for that purpose. My friends who I’ve known, they know they…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 09:15 PM
0

I disagree that it’s women that are more likely to underestimate their trauma. Women are more likely (key word is likely) to try to navigate their trauma in healthy ways. Men don’t tend to do that. It’s way more likely for men to see the bad stuff that happened to them as “character development” while not recognizing what they experienced as trauma. I think men trauma dump more. Even from just a friend standpoint, I’ve had guys I JUST met tell me some messed up stuff about their past. They try t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 08:39 PM
2

So again, your friends and family only value you for what you do?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 08:35 PM
4

Women underestimate their trauma? as someone that dates men, I’ve seen wayyy more relationship baggage from men than I’ve ever seen women display. And I’ve heard my friend say some crazy shit about someone they were romantically interested in. A man will get trauma from one woman who he actually liked then spend the rest of his days trying to punish every subsequent woman for not being her and for what she did to him. Hell, some of the men here have relationship trauma just from the IDEA of dati…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 08:20 PM
5

So do your friends not value you? Your family? What kind of people are you meeting where they treat you like less than a person?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 08:13 PM
9

You’re not worthless just because people don’t want to have sex with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 05:39 PM
4

How many of these women do you know personally?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/25 05:04 PM
1

She even said they had unmatched sex drives when they started dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 10:48 PM
1

No, she’s high libido.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 10:47 PM
6

I feel like you can’t be a “beta male provider” in a time where the only jobs available to women were “servant, prostitute or wife” Like..being an unmarried woman back then was just…unheard of?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 10:09 PM
3

I feel like this woman would have been extremely happy to have more sex with her husband. There’s no beta bux on her end at all. If anything, she put her own sex drive aside to get with a man she liked.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/02/25 10:05 PM
1

Do you think she’s stupid? She knows your sex drive didn’t just vanish.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/02/25 02:10 AM
–

Nov even if she says she doesn’t want you to sleep with her anyone else, but she’s not sleeping with you..talking about it opens the door to you leaving. Expecting your partner to give up sex forever, with no reason or good alternative is not fair. If she doesn’t want to fix it, you’re in your rights to leave. Hell, even if it’s something she CANT fix: if she’s not open to letting you get your needs addressed elsewhere, and you’re not okay abstaining, it’s perfectly okay for you to leave. You ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 10:55 PM
–

Do you think that woman was actually a good partner? Or a good person?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 10:17 PM
–

But you don’t just randomly wake up to a bad sex life with your long term partner. There was a point where it started slowing down and you said “oh it’s not a big deal”…then it kept going on. Without it being addressed again, you can’t hope to fix it. Maybe she genuinely doesn’t want to have sex with you ever again…a conversation could at least open the door to you being able to get your needs met elsewhere. And you could do it without cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 10:16 PM
1

I wouldn’t say I a low libido. But there are times when I just cannot get aroused. Even if I want to. That’s different than me not being in the mood and then getting in the mood. But I’m just pointing out that you saying you can choose to be horny isn’t always the case. It’s not even that I could just try to enjoy it, there are just times when the nerves don’t fire. I actually would say my sex drive is pretty high, my body just doesn’t agree with me sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 10:12 PM
–

So, lack of sex can be used to make an argument for abandonment in states that have fault based divorce though.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 08:43 PM
–

I cannot choose when I get to feel sexual pleasure. Sometimes my body just isn’t into it. Nothing anyone says or does will get me there. It’s not often, but it does happen. No amount of seduction will make me feel it. I can turn it back on at will. This is a thing that happens to people sometimes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 08:37 PM
–

Why would you cheat in a relationship that’s just “mildly” broken?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/02/25 08:27 PM
1

It depends for me. One cat? Usually fine. And it’s good chance he got it by mistake or it just wandered into his life and he kept it. 2+ cats is where it gets dicey.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 01:50 AM
3

It’s usually bad. The men seem to be like..weird ex emo kids that listened to the Lumineers in high school. Then they grew up, learned what ENM was and thought they should make that their personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 12:39 AM
3

Why do single men with multiple cats always look like they have multiple cats? I can’t explain it, but like 80% of the time I can tell if a man has more than one cat just by a couple of pictures on his profile. It’s bizarre.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/02/25 12:27 AM
1

I have generally seen it as the woman realizing she has to make the first move or be more direct in signaling her interests. Because now she sees the guy may have other women interested in him so she has to set herself apart somehow.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/02/25 11:30 AM
1

What makes you feel loved?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/02/25 12:12 PM
1

Because you don’t think anal sex and blow jobs count as sex? Is a man that’s only ever had anal a virgin?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 03:13 PM
2

No, because if they valued women and saw them as full people, women having sex with other women would count against her “body count”. Instead they don’t count that. They actually only count her having sex with other men as her having real sex. They don’t even consider a woman being sexually intimate with another woman as sex for real. But if you flip it, a man that has sex with other men is still considered to have had sex. It counts whether he was the giver or the receiver.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:52 PM
1

Let me get this straight. A woman can have 1000 partners and do only anal and blow jobs and you don’t think men would care?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:50 PM
–

So you don’t think people should be compensated if they stayed at home, put their career on hold (or never got to have a career) to care for kids? You do realize if she hadn’t stayed at home they would have paid for care for the children. And most men don’t pay much in a divorce. The average man is not being forced to away his home with no benefit to himself: most divorces are settled out of court. I do think more people should go to court instead of settling divorces out of court. While it is e…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 02:15 PM
2

So it doesn’t matter if a woman has giving a bunch of blow jobs or had anal?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 03:22 AM
0

You can’t value chastity if you’ve slept with 50 people.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 12:14 AM
1

I think it’s weird how some men devalue women so much that women having sex with other women doesn’t count as sex in their eyes. Seems like a lot of guys would be happy with a woman who had only ever been with women. Even if she’s in the triple digits they wouldn’t count it as sex. It kinda shows that the whole spiel about being the best she’d ever had is nonsense.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/02/25 12:00 AM
2

Being against certain people having rights because of their beliefs. Being against social programs that give the poor and needy essentials in this capitalistic world, despite the fact that for capitalism to exist, some people HAVE to lose and be at the bottom.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 05:15 PM
2

There is no man hot enough for me to excuse what I see as a moral failing on his part.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/02/25 05:13 PM
0

Even if you care about them a little, in order to want to spend your life with someone who you don’t love, you have to be willing to sacrifice a lot. Like, if you don’t love them staying together isn’t going to do anything except make you have duty sex and be tied to them forever. If they grow to care about the person then that’s fine. But staying together when there are not feelings on one side is silly. Just break up and move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 07:59 PM
-3

That’s the point. They probably got into the relationship and stayed because there was “no reason” to break up.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/25 04:52 AM
–

The range for matches for my guy friends is dorm 25-35. So we are covering a lot of ground while getting a lot of variety.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:36 PM
–

Hmm I’ve often swiped on guy friends bumble/hinge and I don’t think I’ve seen too many women expressing the their potential partner have an interest in Taylor Swift. I’ve seen the “won’t judge me for knowing every Taylor swift song” a lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:26 PM
–

Sharing common interest doesn’t mean that they have all their interest in common.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/25 09:17 PM
2

The word “worship” heavily implies this is a kink.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 10:16 PM
2

It’s so weird. There are alternative communities just for those types of things. Why don’t they look there first?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 08:42 PM
1

I hate it here. But at least he’s being honest - might work for someone’s https://preview.redd.it/50ij665oa7fe1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=0368d6f10bd4b3f9935c236da6f1a5f762afcbfd
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/25 08:35 PM
16

This happens all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/25 07:38 PM
–

This is just you. The average man has hobbies that he has no issues spending money on. Sports for instance: mainly men, marketed to men, sports merch is some of the most expensive clothing you can buy, simply because of the branding. Looks at the Super Bowl,
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 11:49 AM
2

No you misunderstand: is it possible that someone can find a person who does not fit in with the peoples they’ve dated, attractive. For example: I find men with beards attractive. I have never dated a man with a beard.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 11:40 AM
2

Why do you think her dating history is the full list of all the men she found attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:55 AM
–

Yeah: the man had a fancy computer or brand new gaming system (sometimes both). Fancy TV. Ordered delivery almost every day. The gaming system had tons of games on it that he purchased. The TV was outfitted with this light system that changed based on the tones in what you were watching. But god forbid he have more than one set of plates! Men spend money on their hobbies then act like that’s not spending money.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:54 AM
–

Men aren’t frugal. They consider the things they DO spend a lot of money on as extremely important needs. Rather than being expensive wants.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/25 10:45 AM
1

Why do you think you’re not worthy of her genuine desire?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/25 06:05 PM
–

Nope, got a few early 30s, sitting here flabbergasted and terrified. But no, I just have terrible luck with exes. This guys ex literally cheated on him and he went back: I can’t compete with that level of love.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 03:04 AM
–

Yeah 4 times over the course of like a decade of dating. It’s just interesting pattern I’ve found with certain guys and their supposedly “out of their life” exes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:59 AM
–

Why do you think it’s every other month or constant? This guy and I were just in the early phases of dating. Hadn’t been intimate besides some kissing, but we definitely enjoyed one another’s company- or I enjoyed his.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:58 AM
–

Isn’t that what dating is? And this gig aid two years between this ex and me…TWO!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:55 AM
–

For most of them it was wayyy too far past the breakup for them to be using me. Maybe the exception was the first one…but after that I made a rule not to date men who were too recently single. Now there’s gotta be like an 8 month buffer between me and his last LTR.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:45 AM
–

No no, it’s not bad luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:35 AM
–

Maybe. But no one will ever convince me that men are more rational when it comes to relationships because if this. This is the fourth time this has happened. The men have all left to go “try it again” because this person was “their one”. And it’s never worked. How do I know it’s never worked, you may ask: because they all have come back to beg ME for another shot. Nope. Go be with her - you said you wanted to make it work.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:35 AM
–

This!
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:31 AM
–

Yes he did. No you couldn’t see my face, just my hand and our food.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:29 AM
–

It’s been two years since they broke up. He dated other people.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:26 AM
–

let’s just say if you’ve previously had a type, dating outside of that type will bring whatever person you had before back running. I don’t even know why he went back though. She cheated on him. I hope she cheats again, films it, then breaks up with him via video of just her cheating.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:25 AM
–

Nah not preselectiom because he dated someone else before me , the ex never was in the picture then. This is just some bullshit. This is like the fourth time this has happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:23 AM
–

Dude it’s not Chad, I’m just cursed to redirect exes. If you want your ex back, I got you. One instagram post later she will be running back trying to apologize. This is some bullshit, this has happened too many times. And I know why! I just can’t say why.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:22 AM
–

I swear, nothing makes an ex reappear faster than a man posting a story of me and him just holding hands. My face doesn’t even need to be in it… That woman will resurrect from the dead just to try and get that man back. I am cursed.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:18 AM
1

So they would date women who are objectively unattractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:12 AM
3

You’re really overestimating men’s ability to pleasure their partner easily. My best sex ever yielded me exactly 0 orgasms. But I was relaxed, really in tune with the guy so it was a lot of fun and very romantic and sweet,
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:10 AM
1

You’ve head a lot of make friends say what?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:08 AM
2

Men that can get women and men that have group sex are very different. And men get this standard wrong: it’s not that women care explicitly that you can get women - women just want you to be attractive. Or have something that’s attractive (though this is not sustainable). A woman that’s dating an ugly rich man doesn’t think he’s attracting women with his face: she’s with him because he has something she wants. An men certainly do care if other men find their partner attractive - if a man had a g…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 02:02 AM
2

Sounds like that man was shitty not her. It’s okay for you not to want to date people that do certain things - but if you think certain actions impair morals then you shouldn’t do those things either.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:52 AM
3

So, in the FFM threesome,couldn’t that man be having sex because he just wants to treat the women like an object? What makes this any different? He’s still a man acting out his pleasures on women who he might or have long term interest in? How is it raising the man’s status? What if they two women would have had sex with any man? He was just the first to offer? What if they are a couple and he is the extra brought in as a means for their pleasure and enjoyment? Men have the weirdest way of deval…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:48 AM
3

How many woman do you know where they are getting gangbanged? I don’t know of a single woman (outside of a very select group of sex positive/kinky friends) that have had any kind of group sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:34 AM
4

They’d only be together if they shared a social circle still. But even among strangers, if I had been with a guy before and heard him telling this new woman how he was all pious and valued relationships over sex, I’d definitely tell her that he was playing her. But unless you’re dating in a small town. This would never happen. I don’t think I’ve ever run into an ex in a big city. Personally I think guys are way more telling when it comes to women they’ve fucked. Even when they think they are hid…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:29 AM
2

Are FFM threesomes degrading to the man? To the women? What if the men in the MMF threesome are bi?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:24 AM
1

Where is it not illegal in the US?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:14 AM
2

So if she had the threesome knowing she couldn’t get pregnant by either man? Would that make it different? Also how does this impact you? Does she have a child? Is she claiming a child was yours despite you not being part of the threesome?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 01:13 AM
1

I’m not sure what the point of this post was tbh. Did you not know that it was illegal before?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:58 AM
1

Why shouldn’t it be illegal? It’s unfair. Now, most marriages don’t end in alimony, but for those that do, I think it would be fair to implement some sort of “time-in-service” rule so to speak. Like if you are married for only a year, there’s no way you can justify taking half of the wealthier partners current assets just because they were marital property. Like let’s say you have a wealthy man that married this much poorer woman. Based on current US laws in the majority of states, anything they…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:53 AM
1

You’re the one that said they do it. You have to be basing this assertion of something tangible right? Like something you read specifically? Or are you just basing it off what you heard? What do you mean they let your attorney handle them? Do you mean for your business? If she hates DEI she didn’t understand it or she’s just racist. Like most people who hate DEI and Affirmative Action. They do so because they are ignorant of what the law actually says and how it works. Most people that hate it h…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:42 AM
1

No I mean show me proof the federal government is mandating it, and not that companies are taking wild interpretations of a validly written law. In my experience, companies that don’t like DEI initiatives will try to “uphold” the law by hiring ANY PERPON that is considered diverse for the role, and then when that person ain’t qualified they will try to go to the government and say, “look this doesn’t work.” But in reality, diversity initiatives aren’t about getting unqualified people in. It’s ab…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:35 AM
5

You’d be disgusted because she had sex with two attractive men?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:31 AM
7

…women will definitely tell another woman if she’s fucked the guy someone else is dating. Or another woman in the group will. It’s definitely not easy to keep quiet if someone is community dick. Everybody knows.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:30 AM
2

In this list where I found it, there isn’t even one specifically for women only, unless you count the one for moms only.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:19 AM
0

Also can you show me any proof of businesses getting diversity grants for H-1B or any title or DEI initiatives that say companies have to hire certain people regardless of qualification?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:18 AM
2

I’m so confused? Why can’t you go to college? I didn’t get any scholarships my first semester, I got over a 3.5 and got plenty. As did a lot of my guy friends who ended up in the honors college with me. I wasn’t just handed any scholarships because I was a woman. I had to apply for them all.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/01/25 12:07 AM
5

Here’s a list of US scholarships just for men: https://www.scholarships.com/financial-aid/college-scholarships/scholarship-directory/gender/male
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:50 PM
3

Do you not know that colleges give grants and scholarships to men? I’m so confused that you’re confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:49 PM
5

I’m so confused? It already is illegal to hide assets and not give a truthful accounting during a divorce.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:31 PM
0

Colleges give grants to men too? I’m so confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:10 PM
6

It is illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 11:09 PM
9

How does this work from birth in your mind?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 09:43 PM
10

So you think women just …existing..makes them attention starved?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/25 09:28 PM
1

You said that “fault always negated the entirety of the marriage”, it doesn’t. Fault CAN end the marriage if someone chooses for a fault based divorce. (In this hypo) But it doesn’t negate the marriage so the damages would probably have to be calculated from the time of the fault. Which would require investigation into when the cheating happened: this is kind of already done at times, if a party wants to prove that marriage funds were used in an affair so the non-breaching party wants those fund…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 02:42 PM
1

Fault never negated the entirety of the marriage: fault negated the marriage from that point. It didn’t make the marriage not happen. It wasn’t an annulment.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 01:06 PM
2

Do you read a woman’s profile so she’s not attractive?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/25 02:05 AM
1

What if the not at fault party isn’t the most fit parent?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 10:09 PM
3

Cheating isn’t a crime though. Under US law it’s more in line with tort and contract law, under contract law there are some breaches that are total breaches, while others are partial. Some can result in the contract being cancelled. Others can result in it being voided. Generally if there is some performance, the other party won’t be unjustly enriched because of a breach, the goal is to either (a) put party in the position it would have been had the contract been completed or (b) but party in th…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:41 PM
3

So again, how will no fault divorce differ from regular divorce? Taking kids away isn’t the answer: someone can be a shitty partner but an amazing parent. Will this person lose complete custody of their children forever?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:37 PM
1

How is a divorce not a reasonable consequence?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 09:08 PM
2

A divorce is a reasonable consequence, but if we are calling it a fault the fault has to attach at some point. For instance, let’s say a man is cheating, he is the main breadwinner of his home. With fault divorce what would be the difference in result as compared to no-fault divorce for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:53 PM
4

So are they going to take custody of the kids away too?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:45 PM
4

The fault does not negate the entirety of the marriage though. If I’ve been faithful for 20 years and you directly benefited from it, you should not be unjustly enriched just because of our split and a moment of fault. Marriage laws are a mix of torts and contracts law. For the fault part you’d have to determine damages, who got what from what asset, how much each person contributed to the marriage and turn that contribution into number. You can’t just say: “you are at fault so now you get nothi…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:29 PM
2

I know that. See my first point.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 08:06 PM
3

Have fault divorce is an extremely complicated system that would make divorce take YEARS in the modern day. Right now, most divorces settle out of court (most couples don’t have much in the way of assets to split). If we make fault-based divorce an option there are three major issues: (1) who gets to decide which basis for divorce to use? (2) when fault based divorce is used, at which point do we start to contribute fault? For instance. Let’s say someone was cheating. The affair started in 2025.…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:27 PM
0

My god this bullshit again? If you think she’s cheating don’t have sex with her!
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:18 PM
1

I live in a large city? The crime rate is what it is, but that comes with not living in the suburbs. I grew up in a very affluent suburb with a very low crime rate: but I didn’t fail to notice that the kid who was causing some of the problems I had growing up got them all swept under the rug by his exorbitantly wealthy father. Crime rates happen. Doesn’t change the fact that the city I am in now is amazing. What was the purpose of asking that?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 07:00 PM
1

Yes. One of the highest.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:50 PM
1

I’m not 23 though: I make more than above average. I am used to living a certain way and I want a partner that is on the same page as I am with that. I have a baby and have to take prolonged maternity leave due to complications. My paid leave runs out. Now we are without my money to fill in the gaps and totally dependent on his, much lower wage, with the addition of medical bills and a baby to care for. I’m not saying 70k isn’t a respectable amount: I am saying that for me, 70k and a retirement …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 06:25 PM
2

Even in those situations, those men are dating women who have NO MONEY of their own. They know those women have no money or real long term goals outside of attaching themselves to a man that has some form of disposable income. Why are they dating them? Do what women do and create an income limit for the women you date. It’s amazing how nice the dating market gets when both partners have jobs and stable income.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:54 PM
1

Why do you think I’m out of touch? I understand what the average salary in the US is very well. That doesn’t mean I have to accept a partner that makes slightly above it: especially when I was not raised in an average household myself.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:52 PM
1

You need to talk to the guy that’s replying calling me out of touch. He seems to think I’m ridiculous for the exact opposite reason as you,
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:50 PM
1

No I am not. The man is not wealthy by any means.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:49 PM
2

I get “special treatment” because I ask for it. I don’t care what my partner has done for other women he’s dated: there are things I want out of a relationship and there are things I need. If I’m dating him, the assumption has been met that he can do the things I need. There is no world where my treatment of a partner would differ because of his past. I don’t care if we are equals: I’m spoiling him because I care about him and want him to be happy. I’d want him to do the same for me, if he was c…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:44 PM
1

There’s another guy here saying that 70k is average. But I also mentioned that it’s completely deemed by your background. What the average person makes doesn’t really impact me or my choices, because I am in an area where people make more. I work in a field where people make more - come from a family that makes more. Even if I dated a guy that made less than me, I would only do so if I could still maintain the lifestyle I am used to.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:40 PM
2

So why are you dating her?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 05:17 PM
2

How do those two things relate? I see my partner as an equal - I still care if he was doing a lot of sleeping around There’s no world where treatment would change based on history: if I don’t like how many partners you’s been with in the past, I wouldn’t date you. Thats much less insulting than treating a current partner like they are lesser.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:56 PM
3

I don’t understand this comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:54 PM
1

I didn’t say she thought he as rich, she thought he made good money. Her idea of wealth was very very different than mine. Plus, they both have no debt and live in a city with very low overhead. 70k is below average in the city I’m in now. So it does depend.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:53 PM
3

But that only works with things you are physically able to do. Yes your girlfriend should be able to pay and treat you for dates assuming she works and/or has money of her own.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 04:43 PM
1

Is your girlfriend physically able to lift you yet refuses to?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:34 PM
1

I’m not an average person in the US though? I wasn’t even raised in an average US household by income standards. I date within my socioeconomic class. I also live in a large city so it’s very easy to find people that make over 70k.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/25 03:12 AM
1

I don’t have to see the community dick having sex to know he’s community dick. I know he is because I’ve heard about it, despite the fact that I’ve never run into him, met him or engaged with him. People talk about him. If people have to see you being promiscuous in order to think you’re promiscuous, then you’re probably not getting around as much as you think.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 09:15 PM
1

Pay for most things like what? Can you provide examples!
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 08:05 PM
2

I haven’t been to Applebees in years: I don’t think I’d go as a first date - I’d rather hit up a dive bar or a local bar/grill that way you can support the mom and pop places. But yeah, any guy that’s been okay with just a cheap chain, in my experience has wanted to put in no Kris effort than that. Even for himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 06:18 PM
7

Women can be really bad at this too though. They will constantly find these guys they have to drag to whatever places or make them do things they aren’t interested in…just date a guy who is into it. Like this whole “she should be happy with a date to Applebees” discourse that was going around recently. The man I date wouldn’t want to eat at Applebees. He won’t think going to a nice sit down restaurant or a gallery opening is a huge blow to his wallet, because it’s something he would do for himse…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 06:07 PM
11

I think they shared some traits. But there were years in between so what I wanted/was looking for definitely shifted. Like when I was 25 I was very religious, so being religious was on my list. I also had less education, so being educated on some level wasn’t a consideration for me. (Notice it’s not on the list - but education is a minimum point for me now to even consider dating someone.) One guy I really liked - but he constantly cheated and lied so I left. He was a physics PhD. This was the g…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 06:00 PM
0

How if most of these men have supposedly never dated?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 05:23 PM
3

If she was the village bicycle wouldn’t you know before you went on a date with her?
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:38 PM
12

Man I want: (not an exhaustive list) good communicator, shared values, responsible, has good self-worth, not a picky eater, interested (minimally) in art and film, has his own sense of self, Last man I slept with: shared values, responsible, not a picky eater, interested in art and film, had his own sense of self. Why we didn’t get married: he had a kid with an extremely dramatic co-parent. I could not handle the drama and I think I did not really want to be a step mom at the time anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:34 PM
7

I don’t even expect my partners to foot the majority of the bills? The only women I know whose men pay for everything are either (1) lower middle class where the woman is making like 10-20k per year and her husband makes way more. Or (2) genuinely wealthy men. Other than that, the women are paying for things/dates/ and taking on their share of the mental and physical load in the relationship. Even the ones that are dating guys that are happy to pay for dates, those men don’t pay her bills unless…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:25 PM
17

This is why I tell people not to date those who aren’t treating themselves the same way you’d treat them. I do not want a man who sees going out to certain placed as “appeasing me”. I want him to enjoy it too. I don’t want a man who sees the things I enjoy as extraneous. Just like you don’t want a woman who sees things you don’t enjoy as necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/25 04:04 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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