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dinoob2017 Archive

View 1 post and 26 comments by dinoob2017 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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dinoob2017/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:06 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

I think I felt that way for like a month - painting all men to be just like my STBXH and just being done with men altogether. But then living by myself, away from the constant criticism, I just started to trust that there will be at least one guy I will really enjoy again. It just lifted when I got space. Is this how you’re feeling? That you’ll just have a bad experience with any woman? I’m just trying to understand from your perspective 1
/r/Divorce_Men01/02/24 12:26 AM
2

This though. It’s helpful to know that men deal with neglect. I will admit I completely checked out of my marriage. My ex might say he felt neglected but that was after one-way caretaking for a long time with two young kids. Even pregnant, even postpartum. He didn’t even want to take me to the hospital for postpartum preeclampsia because “I need someone to take care of this baby!” Anyway, I digress. I’m confident in terms of I’m attractive enough - not a 3, not a 10 (maybe I’m just a 5!) - and I…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 03:01 PM
1

The more I’m talking to men on here, the more I understand that I’m not really looking for sex, and I won’t actually pull the trigger when the rubber hits the road. It’s a fantasy, and an emotional wall I’m putting up. I’m looking for connection but I’m scared of the same thing happening: That I get emotionally drained, that my needs come last or not at all again. I think it’s more accurate to say I really want CONNECTION, which this conversation has provided. And once I have connection, the sex…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 02:54 PM
2

I’m genuinely sorry to hear that, and I hope something breathes life back into you soon. I thought I was done, but getting my own space brought me back to life.
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 02:18 AM
2

Yeah I’m not up late either, and I’m intentionally sober but this might break my streak for a minute. And lol you at the hardware store is me at the grocery store! Literally just not reading anything into it. I hear you about “forgot who you were” - I went dead in ways to get through every day. I started to believe that I really sucked because he would take my personal flaws and just carve me open about them. Shame me into oblivion. I also get that it’s difficult at first, because even if it’s b…
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 02:15 AM
2

You’re describing my environment too well - I don’t even want to put the state I’m in here. And I’m def not your ex wife, before anybody gets those ideas.
/r/Divorce_Men31/01/24 12:16 AM
2

Omg this is wild!!! Ok, so I’m realizing that while I’m friendly, I’m clearly not giving these kinds of vibes. I’m friendly and flirty with men I know on some level, but I’m afraid of men I don’t know at all. I tried out just smiling extra at a guy in the parking deck at work today and he lit right up, which lit me up, and then I immediately got scared. As if some guy at 8:30am going to work is a threat - but it wasn’t a conscious thing. So I’m probably more standoffish than I know, I only notic…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 08:01 PM
1

I truly enjoy when men say this, because it’s flattering, I love that you think that, but it’s not true. Or I’m doing it wrong. Or I should specify that I want GOOD sex. I’m not interested in being a masturbation tool one more time. That’s probably why I want the in-person experience, it’s pretty clear who knows their way around women versus who uses us/me. Also sometimes men’s radar is just not on. And women cannot just throw themselves at men, it turns them off - even in my 20’s this was true,…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 11:42 AM
1

I made a profile on Stir in a desperate moment and pulled it down the next day. I wanted to see what was out there, but then worried my ex could see it. I’m not trying to stir the pot in the divorce. He could not be less interested in me sexually, but probably doesn’t want me getting with anyone else - out of pride, I imagine. I don’t get it. Even in my dreams, I couldn’t have any sex (except him) because I was that terrified of the consequences of even fantasizing about anyone. So. Many. Frustr…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 05:21 AM
2

I really never thought of the grocery store as a place to make a connection until now, which is wild. But I think I dismissed it as cliche and not something people do. Also I’m usually in a wild-eyed frenzy to get what I need before I have to be at the next thing. But I will make better use of my time there! But I also believe it’s better to find your happy and the right people will gravitate toward you, physically, romantically and otherwise. I am just “thirsty” as they say. Man, I was absolute…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 05:07 AM
5

I wondered if I stepped out of line here, but I honestly thought if I did, maybe I would reach someone who could tell me where would be more appropriate. I thought about r/divorce, but I really didn’t think it would go well, for some reason. Thanks for allowing it. I’m sorry to anyone here who is wishing I hadn’t posted. I hope men in this group benefit from what is being shared. I tried to comment often to contribute, so I hope that was the right thing to do. Thanks again, this was a good exper…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:55 AM
2

I guess I’m a flirt, but I haven’t felt like I could for awhile. Honestly, I’m gonna do more of this. So much fun. I might be craving this as much as the sex.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:43 AM
3

Yeah, I had one date in the late 2000’s, and I just didn’t like the process. I love that initial flirting where you’re both taking risks. Maybe I want the freedom to flirt more than the sex, but still very much want the sex - just with someone I have solid chemistry with.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:23 AM
3

Agreed on so many fronts: as a single parent, I’m limited in my social options timewise. Online dating sounds tedious and exhausting, but also just not me. I love the thrill of the surprise of meeting someone that you feel that chemistry with. Dating apps feel like a sterile environment compared to that in-person guesswork and uncertainty, and therefore the anticipation and hope. I think maybe I just want to be around some more men. Maybe I just miss men. Maybe that’s why I posted here.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:19 AM
2

But I have also absolutely no time to go to the gym right now, so that’s out. When I met my STBXH, I was genuinely there because I liked it, it was a daily routine, stress-relief thing. So I was just doing what I loved and wasn’t in a hurry, wasn’t looking for a relationship. Ugh. Maybe I’m just in too much of a hurry right now to do anything that will get the result I want. Like I’m just desperate and forcing it. I’m just going to end up with bad sex and wasted time.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:13 AM
2

Met my STBXH at the gym.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:04 AM
2

I’m flirty, will totally laugh at terrible pick up lines for their terribleness and only hated being approached if a guy gave me a bad feeling or scared me. So I was open to being approached. But I still do not like men in my yoga class for the purpose of hitting on women - same reasons. For some reason it makes me feel unsafe. But if I’m mingling with men in the weights, that’s different.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 03:03 AM
1

So you do exist. Gives me hope!
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 02:58 AM
3

Lol this post was great it made my day. I won’t be jumping into a bar anytime soon. Those days are over, for all the reasons you mentioned. Your post gave me a starting point if what I want, which is to meet someone in person who also wants to meet in person. And sundresses! Yes!! I met my STBXH at the gym and I was literally floored and flattered to be approached the way he did it. He was kind, gave me a compliment and was straightforward about asking me on a date. Of course I said yes. Despite…
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 02:55 AM
2

I really appreciate hearing about your experience, since I haven’t even started dating. I feel like dating apps will certainly result in dates, but exactly like you’re saying, not necessarily “matches”. I’m just feeling impatient. And I just honestly feel really out of touch with men and their experiences even though I’ve always been told I’m easy to talk to. This post explains a lot and I appreciate the time you took to make it.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 02:44 AM
3

This is helpful - a mix of encouraging and discouraging, but it all resonates.
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 02:35 AM
2

This is super helpful! Thank you!
/r/Divorce_Men30/01/24 02:29 AM
2

I’m an optimist, so maybe I’ll just follow my intuition all the way to Home Depot for chapstick. 😅😂
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:55 PM
2

TL:DR where can an early 40’s soon to be divorced mother of 2 go to maximize chances of running into men who would flirt, hit on, ask for number for purposes of a FWB situation. Horny AF. Not into a whole relationship.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:54 PM
2

I live in a fairly small college town, to me it seems like online dating is more risky for people looking to commit a felony or just not be who they say they are. Maybe I’ll give it a try. Also, my STBXH could see me there and that could cause problems I’m not trying to have.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:52 PM
-3

Right - and I’ve looked there. It’s overwhelming. I just want to do this in person.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/24 12:48 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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