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aburke626 Archive

View 4 posts and 121 comments by aburke626 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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26

You’re totally right. Guys who care and pay attention to detail tend to do that throughout their life. The first really good guy I dated after a horrible relationship was texting me before I was planning to stay over for the first time. He asked me what kind of breakfast meat I liked. He was at the store and wanted to make sure he could make me breakfast. I’d never had anyone do that for me. Most guys don’t even make sure they have food, let alone food their date/partner likes. But this guy did.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/01/22 03:57 AM
3

Aside from friends I met at school, most of my friends these days I’ve made from animal rescue throughout the years. Rescue people are ride or die. I could call them in the middle of the night in an emergency and they will mobilize and be there. We fix things first and think later. As long as you avoid the drama-leaning folks, you’ll find the best people you’ll ever meet. Plus, animals who will change your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 04:25 AM
48

This is the thing I can’t stand on this sub. There’s vetting men and being careful, and then there’s assuming every man is lying about everything, and that every woman is an idiot for believing a word they say. That’s not a healthy way to live and you’ll never find a healthy relationship that way. I don’t need to justify my description of someone else’s relationship to anyone. He did not describe it as abuse, I did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 04:18 AM
48

I don’t, unfortunately. We only dated briefly before I moved across the country and we didn’t stay in close touch for long after. I do hope he is well, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 03:46 AM
305

To me, a huge red/green flag is how men talk about their exes. I once dated a guy who was going through a brutal divorce with a woman who had just horribly abused him and fucked him over, and he still never said anything unkind about her. He was over it and moving on and all, but when he’d talk about it, he’d never call her names or say anything disrespectful, and I was always impressed at how much he took the higher ground. (I personally wouldn’t have been so kind). He was a really HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 02:10 AM
40

Agreed, I think it’s important to meet and know someone’s family before judging them. I grew up with just my mom, and my high school boyfriend’s family judged me. His grandparents were rich, and despite the fact that his parents were divorced because his dad cheated and oh his mom was an alcoholic, they didn’t think I was good enough because of my “broken home” and public school (despite my stellar grades). My mom raised me FAR better than to judge people from their backgrounds. I often get alon…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 04:16 AM
49

Crumb is a HVM (HVC?).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/21 12:15 AM
56

The amount sounds wrong to me. She’s saying she only did her undergrad, and owes 300k?? Where on earth? And I don’t know how she’d be qualified as a vet tech with an undergrad degree - that’s generally a separate certification. Generally for pre-vet you’re getting a bio degree or similar (almost went to vet school myself). The only thing that tracks is that vet techs don’t make much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 04:30 AM
9

For some reason I don’t equate foot pics with sex stuff if you’re just selling feet pics? I know it’s sex stuff on their end, but there is a part of me that’s like hahahaha suckers you’re paying for pics of FEET, get that bag girl. I don’t know why have this total separation in my head. I guess because feet aren’t private parts?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 04:27 AM
64

I think so many people don’t realize there is a middle ground. We can uplift and support the women who are currently sex workers without denigrating them AND without promoting sex work as a profession. There is also such a wide range of sex work these days, from women engaging in survival sex work to cam girls and onlyfans, and I think acknowledging that those realities are wildly different is important as well. I think the ultimate question about whether sex work is coercive is this: would a se…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 04:23 AM
6

I’m almost certain you’re right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/21 04:13 AM
25

I think the only thing she could possibly get in trouble for here is illegally evicting him - he’s living there, he’s legally a tenant and was entitled to proper notice, etc. not that I blame her, and I doubt he’s going to do anything about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/21 11:25 PM
66

If your newlywed husband looks like he’s being forced to dance with great aunt myrtle who pinches his cheeks … you should run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 10:58 PM
38

I think the code names and whatnot are way less important than knowing that bartenders have been kicking out creeps for as long as there have been bars and if you can communicate to them somehow, they will help you out. Whether it’s calling them over to pretend to order a drink and telling them what’s going on, slipping them a note, furtive gestures - don’t hesitate to tell them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/12/21 10:55 PM
129

Seriously! I do feel bad for women like this, but how do you not meet someone’s family when you’re dating? Not come to the wedding? Never even FaceTimed? I’ve met the parents of every guy I’ve dated even semi-seriously, I’ve always considered that a pretty important relationship step.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 02:18 AM
109

The very first thing he says is “I knew that having kids would take all of my wife’s attention” and then goes on to insist that she should spend more time on her career? And she’s working, just not in a way that makes him happy. Throw the whole man away.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/12/21 02:09 AM
25

I hope she picks a new pen name and keeps publishing and saving up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 03:17 AM
33

Oh for sure - I just mean that he seems to think she agreed to stop writing, period, and I think she agreed to stop focusing on her writing. Which she did. Imagine being so passionate about something and only doing it during your lunch break.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 02:31 AM
48

Or worse, she thought it would be an amazing surprise and instead of being wowed by how incredible she is, he’s making it about him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 01:43 AM
47

Also he should be supporting her writing - with the cost of college these days, she’s gonna have to write another book or two to cover college costs in 18 years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 01:27 AM
177

That’s what bothers me. It sounds like they agreed she’d stop focusing on her writing, and she did. And then she GAVE UP the ONE hour a day she has to herself to continue this thing that was so important to her, and he’s mad because he thinks she could have SKIPPED her lunch break to come home earlier? In what world would that be reasonable?? If she weren’t writing a book she’d be eating her lunch and reading the news or surfing the internet like everyone else for an hour. I’m 100% certain skipp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 12:58 AM
99

Smarts have nothing to do with it. We know in this subreddit that men put in the effort and turn on the charm to get women interested and locked down. Then they change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/11/21 12:52 AM
3

Oh damn I didn’t know about the filming, that’s awful. I’m not going to blame her for being his gf (though seriously she could do better - is it just me or does he seem completely devoid of personality? I have never seen a pic of him with her where he doesn’t just have a blank stare. No smiling, nothing, ever)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/21 09:37 PM
43

I hadn’t heard that Kylie was in involved - what’s the tea?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 08:20 AM
1

It’s obnoxiously flowery, and he’s clearly drunk, which makes him unbearable. The flowery turns of phrase made it much harder to dust off the cobwebs and read this thing. Well, that and his font choice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 08:14 AM
40

I can’t stand him for many reasons, this is one of them. And it’s not like his first wife isn’t absolutely drop dead gorgeous. But he still traded in for a younger model. I guess that was easier than dealing with their grief over the loss of their child.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 07:17 AM
50

I’ve read that Silicon Valley, especially years ago, has a LOT of weird sex stuff going on. Sex parties, stuff like that. And of course a lot of dudes like this one. Add in the culture of booth babes at conventions (even boring tech ones), startups having hot women for receptionists and such, and it’s all rife for sexual assault. Look at Uber’s ex-CEO as an example. I’m in tech and when I was right out of college and even in my first job, I was interviewing with Google and Microsoft and trying t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 07:14 AM
75

Yes! This is my energy exactly and we need more of it. More women need to realize that being single isn’t shameful or wrong or bad. Being with someone who makes you unhappy is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 07:09 AM
259

I believe it. I got diagnosed with endometriosis and I was always in pain and my ex told me, despite my unending support and tolerance of his rapid-cycling bipolar disorder, that I was “a bummer.” I should have left him then but it took me a while. A bummer. Yeah, chronic pain and illness IS a bummer dude. FOR ME. and yea, he was still getting it on the regular. Edit: a typo
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:12 AM
92

But it’s fine for men to claim any woman who ever has an issue with a man has “daddy issues” of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:09 AM
33

The fact that he’s 28 and removing all this tattoos should say something about his decision making process.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:07 AM
58

Yeah, and while I feel for him having Crohn’s disease, it doesn’t make you ugly. It can make you pale and sallow, but he’s just not a good-looking dude, and he looks like he doesn’t take care of himself. I have a bunch of chronic illnesses and I HATE when I look sick. I put a lot of effort into my health and skincare and appearance to not look sad and sick, and if I were on TV every week and dating models, I would definitely step my game up. I think that’s what’s bothersome about him - he looks …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 06:07 AM
211

I cannot believe Kris is letting Kim be seen with him but I guess she’s had enough failed marriages. I’m not against her having fun but like … Pete Davidson? Although I do enjoy how salty Kanye is. Because it’s ok that he was dating models before their divorce was even announced.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 05:05 AM
80

I mean they’re not that rare and they’re not all that. He better be a sex god who gets them off a hundred times or something. I don’t really want to know, frankly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 05:03 AM
176

Relevant t swift lyrics from The Man: “I'd be just like Leo In Saint-Tropez” “If I was out flashing my dollars I'd be a bitch, not a baller They paint me out to be bad So it's okay that I'm mad” (I love this song) Also, in what world does a man who looks like Pete Davidson even land an Ariana or a Kim? Or any of the 80 women he’s dated in between? Is the sex in his mom’s basement that good? It can’t be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/21 04:54 AM
5

Holy shit there is a WORLD between safe, sane, consenting kink and this abuse. Getting your hair pulled or your ass slapped is one thing. Punched in the face until you have black eyes? No. And people who perpetuate this as kink do a disservice to everyone, whether or not you’re pro-kink. I’m still generally of the opinion that adults can do what they want in the bedroom as long as everyone consents, but they have to really truly consent. Not consent because they think their partner wants it, whi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/21 02:18 AM
26

She knows. I mean, can you think of one person who kicked off a legit career from a dating show? Reality TV is a dime a dozen these days. All it does now is get you instagram followers. So great, he can get some promotion deals and have a million women in his DMs. It’ll help his “career” alright.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/11/21 04:44 AM
3

I HATE this. I really prefer dating apps that only show you people/show you TO people who meet your search criteria. It instantly tells me that this man has no concern for my preferences or boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 12:53 AM
82

I’ve talked about this here before - I’m very into animal rescue and I’m very happy with my life. I have a great career, a lot of friends, and I’ve had great relationships with men who love animals as much as I do. But the way some people treat and talk about women like me, as though I only have pets and rescue animals because I have no options, is so exhausting. I choose to open my home to animals. I choose to do this with my life. My home is clean and well-decorated, my pets are happy and heal…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/21 12:38 AM
108

It’s true, this is so unfair. It is FAR easier to train a dog than it is to get a grown man to learn to clean up after himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/10/21 02:01 AM
8

There are some guys out there with serious opinions on women with pets, and I think it’s because they know we are not gonna have time to take care of them and their bullshit because we have already potty trained one animal. Animal rescue is my thing and I always have a bunch of animals around - I only have one dog and two cats but there’s usually a bunch of guinea pigs and currently two bunnies at my house. Men are so intimidated by this and they play it as if I’m some freak. Nope, i’m totally h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 02:57 AM
13

We need a Reddit bot that just says “talk to your wife.” Seriously, the rest of the issues aside, has this guy talked to his wife? About any of this? Ever?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/10/21 02:25 AM
99

And then they push you for nudes and stuff to “prove” you’re real. Nah, not my problem, and tbh I don’t believe there are that many bots on tinder, if men used it like you’re supposed to it wouldn’t be an issue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/21 02:41 AM
458

Ugh, it’s gross that this is a priority but I’d much much much rather they have the condoms than not! Also I hope all of the women are able to access medical care and get whatever kind of birth control they might want, if any.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/21 02:45 AM
63

Guys love this line but sex can actually cause headaches. As someone with chronic migraines, the next guy who tries this line on me is gonna have one hell of a headache!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/09/21 02:15 AM
246

His ex wife’s interviews - there’s an older piece about their relationship - it’s pretty much what you’d think. Once he got rich and busy he started ignoring her and the kids. They also lost a child, which can hurt any relationship, but it seems like all he’s ever wanted is to do whatever he wants. I can’t understand why someone this selfish has children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/21 08:56 PM
4

I’m 5’10 and it’s amazing how many men lie about being 6’. If I can see the top of your head, you’re shorter than me, bud. And I don’t wear heels on most first dates.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:42 AM
15

My NVX was like this. He loved half-Asian girls. I’m white and he once told me he thought my eyes were “just ch*nky enough.” I can’t make this up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:40 AM
9

I want one of those machines so anytime a woman has cramps and a man rolls his eyes or gets annoyed we can make him wear it. I have endometriosis so we’d be dialing that sucker up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:30 AM
15

My ex (not a LVM for once, just didn’t work out) was balding early, but we knew he would because of his dad. He was using prescription shampoo right out of college. I would have supported whichever way he went … but looks like he’s either totally bald or shaved it and oof, I mean, I still would have loved him but I probably would have pushed him to try a little harder, it’s not a great look! Why are guys embarrassed about hairpieces but expect us to wear wigs if we lose our hair? But then we’re …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:27 AM
5

I think what makes me saddest is knowing that there are women out there in a bad enough situation to live with this disgusting dude, and he knows it too. How long til he pimps her out to his friends?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:23 AM
17

I think she’s worth way more than him. She was a huge star and pageant Queen before she blew up on the US. A quick google puts her net worth at $50mil and his at $25mil. (But then other sources vary wildly, so who knows)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:18 AM
17

That Marilyn Frye essay is so excellent. I have that page bookmarked in my book of her essays.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:11 AM
11

I wanted to ask this, too - I don’t think it’s entirely fair to say that HIV or other diseases are prominent in the gay community, but AFAIK they are often unchecked with men on the DL - because they just pretend it didn’t happen, so how could they catch anything? Of of course general toxic masculinity comes in to play. No one would give a shit if they were just honest and safe and bi, but men just have to be shitty. Men doing any kind of mainstream porn might actually be safer than others, sinc…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:09 AM
30

You know it’s a red flag, and that’s why you’re here. If you talk to your friends and your friends think this is normal, don’t listen to them. Not all guys follow models on Instagram. You should have standards that exclude the dudes that do. Edit: I skimmed the OP and had to reword my post.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 03:35 AM
243

I think this dynamic exists in like, every sitcom family ever and it’s so tiring and it’s why women who ask men to do their share are seen as nagging, and men expect to come home from work, have dinner ready, and watch TV and drink beer without lifting a finger to do anything else. And it’s supposed to be funny. It’s not funny, it’s misogynistic and tiresome.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/21 11:41 PM
77

I hate this crap. I would never ever marry a man who wanted to have a raunchy bachelor party - and i wouldn't stand up in the wedding of any friend whose husband wanted it, either. So far, all of my friends' husbands are the type to invite their friends over for games and beer and snacks instead of misogyny - it's not that difficult!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 10:20 PM
273

The amount of mental gymnastics involved to blame women for a forum in which other men convince men they have nothing to live for because they’re not attractive is just staggering. They’re so toxic to each other they can’t even see it. Women have nothing to do with this, we’re just out here existing. If another man has convinced you you’re so worthless that you’ve never talked to a woman, that has nothing to do with women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 08:56 PM
15

I think the stranger thing is what’s most dangerous. The message that young women should be getting isn’t so much that kink is good or bad, but something to be explored with established, trusted partners only, and never with someone you’ve just met.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 06:12 AM
69

Don’t come for Oscar like that, do you see Oscar having 5 garbage mommas? He handles himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 04:23 AM
64

Yeah, this is terrifying. There is a whole world of difference between “slap my ass” and “breaking her eye socket and nearly killing her.” I hope she is ok and reported him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 03:47 AM
69

And also normalize leaving a perfectly good guy that you’re just not perfect for. This is one I got really caught up on, and that still gets me. Just because he’s actually a great, HVM, doesn’t mean he’s the guy for YOU. This can be so hard because everyone knows how great he is, and you know how great he is, but it doesn’t mean you’re perfect together. And that’s ok. You’re not going to get more perfect for each other if you just wait. Let him find the woman who is perfect for him!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/21 12:23 AM
1

Ever thought of fostering something else? I do guinea pigs and bunnies, and small animal rescues are completely overwhelmed right now! (Sorry, can’t help it, we’re so desperate right now)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:39 PM
1

Always more kittens to foster! Edited to add: I’m heavily involved in animal rescue and it’s a good way to measure men - are they into it? Do they have pets they adore? Are they supportive of adoption over breeding? Those are major values for me and can give me a pretty quick nope if guys are like “it’s weird you have so many pets/are so into this.” If you think saving animals is weird, i’m out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:22 PM
206

He doesn’t have a job but “we” bought a house. Right. Get him locked up for the CP so he can’t take any of your assets in the divorce, and do it now. What do you think he’s done that she hasn’t seen? This wasn’t a one time deal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 11:33 PM
9

This! Plenty of normal people have brought someone home, realized they didn’t smell great (especially after dancing or being at a bar or in the summer). Your options: sink shower invite them into the shower with you light some candles, put on some music, invite them to get comfy, and take a 3 minute shower Dirty downstairs is not one of the options.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 04:18 AM
5

Right? I’m at the point where it feels like I’m gonna have to have their moms confirm that they wash their ass before we meet and that’s just …. like, I have guinea pigs to go hang out with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 04:16 AM
48

Yeah, I could see him going through the quicker line alone if they’re running a little late and really need to make sure they can grab snacks or something before the flight, but that’s not an ongoing issue. The obvious answer here was “Your wife should get pre-check and you should offer or cover or go halfsies since your work covers yours.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 04:12 AM
2

This reminds me of just how easy it is to do nice things for someone you love. My mom lives with me and when I’m at the store, I always get her favorite snacks or candy. I grab stuff I know she likes even if it wasn’t on the list. I’ll grab a pretty potted plant at Trader Joe’s. If I go to a winery with my friends I grab her a bottle. If I go on a trip I bring her back presents. It’s so easy to just be thoughtful about little things! And that’s just the “I was out and thinking of you” side of th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 10:43 PM
39

Can we also talk about the fact that he works for her label? That's not ok. Also, he looks like a weasel.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 08:36 PM
492

I definitely feel this. I have no gender dysphoria, but sometimes I wish I could just be seen as a PERSON instead of a WOMAN. Because men can’t see both at the same time, and most of the time, I’m not interested in being seen as a woman. I’m busy and I have shit to do, I’m just a person living my life. Please just ignore that I’m a woman and treat me like a person.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/05/21 06:46 AM
2

I’m tall and the only reason I care about dating guys taller than me is because every time I’ve dated someone shorter, it’s become an issue, or he’s clearly had an issue about it and lied about being clearly shorter than me. Babe, if I can see the top of your head, I’m taller than you. So I’d rather just get ahead of it and date a taller guy and avoid that whole complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:43 AM
3

My shitty ex (who’d I’d helped through so many issues of his own) called me a “bummer” when I was newly dealing with chronic illness and pain. A bummer. Something was a bummer, alright, but it wasn’t me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 02:33 AM
9

It’s a slippery slope! I started with 3 ... then foster failed 3 more ... then I got some here and there ... I have 8 girls in my herd right now, which is actually perfect and they’re great. I think I’m going to keep my two foster boys though, and that might be trouble! But I love them so much, and I love fostering them, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 07:27 AM
5

I hate having to be compared to an object or currency for a man to understand my value.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 01:33 AM
33

I did some digging, this is the original tweet that ranker got the info from: https://twitter.com/digivictorian/status/964842367508516864?s=21
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 01:07 AM
48

I’m turning 35 next month, clearly I should just embrace my nature as an old hag! But really being single is great, no one to tell me “no you can’t adopt more guinea pigs”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 01:05 AM
88

Right? Those first two are literally why I’m single. I don’t have time to care for a man. I have enough rescues in my house. If I want to potty train a helpless being, I’ll adopt a puppy. It will be loyal forever and bring me joy, unlike most men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 11:03 PM
3

I just searched for this post because I found it on the other subreddit. I can’t even believe it. I hope that it’s fake, I do, because I don’t want to believe that poor woman didn’t walk out the door.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 05:11 AM
14

I don’t understand putting up with this! If I came home to my boyfriend naked and smelly, I’d say “go shower and put pants on.” And if he still smelled, I’d make him fix it, up to going to the doctor. Don’t be passive!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:46 AM
17

The most HVM I’ve ever dated had his most recent results on his fridge when I first came over. I loved that he was proactive and open about it. He also texted me to ask me what I wanted for breakfast when I was planning to stay over and always cooked for me. I wish I hadn’t moved, he was a good one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:39 AM
8

NOT an HVM but I’d make bad decisions for him anyway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:35 AM
15

Right? I thought “dad bod” originally meant guys who used to be ripped but just don’t have a 6 pack anymore, and they jiggle a little. Aka, normal dude bod? Which is fine! But now I guess it’s embraced as fat dude bod. I’m fat myself, so I can’t say much, but I don’t pretend I’m not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:28 AM
64

I’m the only daughter of a single mom. My dad was never in the picture and I’ve never gotten a straight answer about why. My mom has never dated. When I was younger I felt bad and assumed she wanted to date but didn’t because of me. Now that I’m older than she was when she had me (she wasn’t particularly young), I realize a man was the last thing she needed in her life, unless he wanted to shower us with money. It’s not like someone was gonna help raise me. She didn’t need a babysitter, I had pl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:24 AM
17

Is it? Or are women just so much smarter?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 04:20 AM
21

FACE - drooping ARM - weakness SPEECH - difficulty TIME - to call 911
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 12:39 AM
41

This! Don’t tell them your symptoms and assume the triage nurse will immediately react - tell them “I’m having the symptoms of a heart attack/stroke/etc”. I get abnormal migraines (i now know) that can present with stroke symptoms. But one of those is aphasia and I couldn’t get the words out. My words were slurred, face was drooping, and I couldn’t strings a sentence together. It took hours for them to see me. I’ve been told (by ER docs) to always treat it as a stroke because I am not qualified …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 11:51 PM
129

So important! https://www.heart.org/en/health-topics/heart-attack/warning-signs-of-a-heart-attack/heart-attack-symptoms-in-women And women are much more likely to think it's not serious, maybe take something over the counter, go to bed, and pass in their sleep. We all need to know this, no matter your age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 10:16 PM
23

I am a 34 year old fat cat lady, thank you, and I also have guinea pigs. I’m also beautiful, brilliant, and successful and happier without a man in my life than I ever thought I could be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 01:49 AM
6

I am SO angry about the murders in Atlanta. That somehow claiming to be a sex addict makes it better? That it’s ok to kill women because you’re tempted by them? It emphasizes the degree to which we are just objects. Add the objectification of Asian women by white men in there, and it’s even more classic disgusting behavior. But oh, he had such a bad day! A fight with his wife! Why does the news, the world, allow this excuse? Why are we as a society still uplifting white male supremacy?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 09:31 PM
8

Oof, that’s heartbreaking. I’ve done that before in a bad relationship - the post came up in my Facebook memories recently. We didn’t usually post much together but we’d had a fight and then he tried to make it up pathetically and I made a whole post about how he’s the best and blah blah so we could just move on and not litigate the fight for a month. It was not 4 pages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 11:42 PM
9

I also feel like she’s doing herself such a disservice here by praising him - if he’s a decent guy, he would probably be happy to level up and do more (not that he should need to be asked), but I’d bet she has never asked.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 11:18 PM
22

Yeah, I got the impression he’s a decent guy, I don’t want to be mean to him, but this doesn’t sound like much effort. She is hyping him up SO hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 11:05 PM
98

Reading this, I just kept feeling like this lady is settling, or she wouldn’t be writing 4 pages about how her husband grocery shops. Everything she lists is stuff I would expect from a grown man in a marriage with children. He sometimes remembers food you like? He washes your mug? He sometimes tends to his own child even! But he can’t cook. And oh god if I hear one more man praised for buying menstrual products, I’ll scream. And how kind of this man not to complain when you go out to cultural e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 10:30 PM
15

That confuses me, too! Most people, by definition, are just normal looking. Not gorgeous, not hideous, just there. I find that once I meet someone and start to like them, they’re the most attractive person in the world to me, which I’m pretty sure is how normal brains are supposed to work. But incels seem to just ignore all of the ordinary people and focus only on the supermodel people and their sad sack selves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:16 AM
17

I’m so terrified of guys like this - it’s one of the reasons I don’t put any effort into dating. I have some chronic illnesses, and any guy who can’t handle talking about bodily functions is never gonna cut it with me. But it’s so hard to weed out. I’d love to assume any decent guy realizes that everyone is human and has a body and bodies do things, but there are actually so few truly HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 01:07 AM
59

Plus, looking good and having pride in your appearance isn’t just about looks or anything superficial- it shows that you have your life together and put effort into things. I mean, it’s a pandemic, I work from home, I’m single, and I deal with some chronic illness, so I could easily devolve into some kind of basement creature. But that would make me feel bad about myself. If you’re past 25 and you don’t own appropriate clothes for various occasions, can’t get dressed appropriately for occasions,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 12:57 AM
5

Ooh there is such a good quote about this - The Politics of Reality by Marilyn Frye should be mandatory FDS reading: ———- The third principle of male-supremacy I listed above is the principle of male homoeroticism. I am not speaking of some sort of "repressed" homosexuality to which the intense heterosexuality of so many men is said to be a reaction. I speak here not of homosexuality but of homoeroticism, and I think it is not in the least repressed. In the dominant straight male language and wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/21 11:41 PM
6

We weren't allowed to wear any kind of "sleeveless" top, but cap sleeves were fine, because that lil half inch "sleeve" really kept the boys from being able to control themselves. I could write an entire thesis about my experience with clothes in the public school, but i definitely learned that my shoulders were an Extremely Sexy part of my body that i should not show to men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 10:19 PM
30

Ugh, I had an awful ex who would talk about how he wanted to screw celebrities, random girls, whatever, but if I said I liked a male celebrity’s music or was friendly with a cashier, it was game over for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/21 11:40 PM
12

I’ll never forget the day I found out that of our 4-girl best friend group, 3 of us had been sexually abused as kids. That’s assuming the 4th wasn’t, she never talked about it. And none of them were strangers. That broke me in a way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/20 01:18 AM
3

Actual stray dogs are cute, you can train them, neuter them, put them in a crate then they’re naughty. But I’m not house training a grown man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/20 04:03 AM
5

So I admit, I have IBS and food dates aren’t my favorite until I know someone a little! So I think there is sometimes wiggle room for a high-quality non-dinner date (and with covid, everything is weird and dinner may not be a real option in some places - I wouldn’t feel comfortable going to dinner right now where I live). I don’t know what this particular guy’s issue is, but I’d personally be ok with something else that shows effort (and not cheapness). For example, I LOVE animals, so a date to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 01:53 AM
29

I totally agree. The only exception I’d give is to very young couples. I think if you’re in your early twenties (and of course teens) you should date longer because you’re young and stupid and don’t know what you’re doing. If I could go back, I would follow my mom’s advice and not be in a serious relationship so young, too. But if you start dating someone at 19 and you’re still dating at 23, I think as long as you’re totally on the same page, it’s different form being older and not having a bigg…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 06:42 AM
3

Wait, are we watching the same channel? I don't usually agree with the career change, but usually the women in these movies are leaving some rich, good-looking, but ultimately shitty LVM for the admittedly broke HVM who treats her like a princess even though he doesn't have a ton of money. Usually the original guy was cheating, or turned out to kick puppies in his spare time, or whatever, and the other guy turned out to be the better guy all along, even though he bakes cookies for kittens for a …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 10:22 PM
29

I like this! Someone once told me to make a list of 100 qualities I wanted in a partner. I did, and I think about it, but I don’t know that I’ve ever sat down and checked them off while trying to date. I think this can be really helpful with red flags, too. Online dating can be tough - he’s cute, you’re lonely, etc. if you flag some conditionals to stand out to you, maybe some conditional highlights in bright red and a huge subtraction, you can make yourself realize some things are dealbreakers …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/20 06:03 AM
7

Do it!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/20 03:32 AM
46

This is so important. Sometimes I think about dating again but honestly me and my dog and my cats and my guinea pigs are happier than I’ve ever been in my life. I have almost no interest in men anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/20 08:33 PM
32

British slang for “bothered.” Can’t be arsed == can’t be bothered.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 06:05 AM
24

This is very true. When I was engaged in my 20s, a couple of my fiancé’s co-workers has gotten OBSCENE rings for their wives. We didn’t have that kind of money (they had wealthy families). I was expecting something nice, but I was worried that he was feeling so much pressure to compete. In the end I got his grandma’s engagement ring - it was a much larger and higher quality stone than I’d dreamed of, and we had it reset. Goddamn I miss that ring (I called it off and it was an heirloom, soo I gav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/20 06:00 AM
27

They’re the same as cat-callers - “hey baby can I get your number?” ignores “fuck you fat bitch!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 04:22 AM
11

Oh no, not the random facebook message! At least it's not a string of "hi" ---date--- "hi" ---date" repeated over months and years. those are the saddest. Also, this isn't AIM, no one messages just to say hi as a courtesy or risk clearing out your buddy list. You're not friends!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 02:41 AM
20

Same! I google myself regularly, so that I know what's out there. I have always worked in a web-based position so it's kind of important. I can't even imagine not knowing that. I have a good idea of who the other people are with my exact name and what they do, and when a younger one grows up and gets a job, I notice (funny enough, I also noticed when a younger one took down all her drinking pics! She must have been graduating, google images suddenly had like a quarter of the results for our name…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 10:41 PM
9

It's unreal how many men lie about their height, and dramatically so. Dude, I'm 5'10. If I can see the top of your head, you are not above 5'8.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/19 08:15 PM
26

Seriously! Just reading Laura Ingalls Wilder as a kid gave me a VERY good idea of what women had to do. Sure, they were pioneers, but people were "pioneers" for most of history! And they lived in a time where they could buy flour and sugar and cloth and didn't have to make it themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/12/19 01:39 AM
35

I hate how “getting me tooed” has turned into slang for “getting wrongly accused of rape” - it’s so gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 07:57 PM
37

That was the exact comment where I started seeing red and had to stop reading. It’s so viscerally upsetting to know there are so many disgusting creatures out there who look at us like that, like pieces of meat who don’t deserve even the littlest respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 07:56 PM
89

I hate guys with the mentality that they don’t need to compliment their partner. I remember once I was with my ex and putting on my favorite bra and I commented how much I liked it and I felt like it made my boobs look great. His response was to tell me not to fish for compliments. I wasn’t, and I didn’t feel like I should have to. Especially about my boobs, ffs. One of those little stinging interactions that’s stuck with me for so long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/12/19 04:28 AM
3

This stuff is wild. One of them considers an “approach” any woman saying hi to him. Ummmm no. Please get over yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/19 04:51 AM
3

This is how i feel looking at OLD but I think 90% of it is just grooming and self-care. I can’t understand how they think they look attractive in the pics they post! No one is out here looking for their junkie unabomber long lost love who looks like he’s never learned to do laundry. FFS, get a nice hair cut, beard trim, take care of yourself. Wear some adult clothes. Learn how to take a half decent photograph. If you can’t make THAT much effort, how much effort can you put into a relationship? T…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/19 04:29 AM
3

Coffee is a good first date instead of drinks! Especially this time of year, it’s nice and cozy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/11/19 03:16 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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