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2ndMrsDeWinter Archive

View 12 posts and 185 comments by 2ndMrsDeWinter on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:30 AM
1

I can’t get posting privileges! I’ve tried 3 times. Any tips?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:29 AM
2

Oh man. This got me. Thank you so much, I’m screenshooting this to look at going fwd.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:29 AM
1

Thank you so much for validating and appropriately positioning my concerns. My mothers panicking I’ll never “find anyone” so it’s hard to remember all these great points. This is so helpful. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:28 AM
1

This is super helpful. I’m a very giving friend, and sometimes I forget that I have to get everyone to have that access to me. Also OMG! I keep comparing him to urkel because it FEELS like he thinks he can wear me down. Oi. Overall, this is hugely helpful, especially since this is one of the rare moments I can’t fully block and delete. Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:26 AM
2

Thank you! I have anxiety disorders so sometimes the listening to my gut part is really hard for me. You pointing out my feelings as my gut feelings really helped!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:23 AM
1

Thank you! This was super helpful to get my head around it and how I would feel overall. And happy cake day!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/22 04:22 AM
1

I definitely DEFINITELY have issues advocating for myself. I’m the type to think I’m overreacting and will try to go with the flow no matter what. But since finding FDS and dumping my NVX, I’m trying to get better at it, or at least better at taking myself out of negative situations faster. Thank you for the advice and encouragement!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:31 AM
2

Thank you! This is really, really helpful. I have been working on these triggers for years, which is why, individually, I can deal with them. I recently added CBT work to my therapy, and your comment made me realize that it’s probably applicable to this situation. And you’re right - he seems like if I just explained the “swearing at me while my adrenaline’s up makes me get scared/mad” thing, he can probably try to tone it down. Or at least will understand if/when I get a little weird afterward. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:26 AM
4

I’m usually pretty good with yelling in real life. I mean I don’t love it, but whatever. It’s some combination of the three things together that throws me for a loop. I’m in therapy, and have been ~10 years. I’m also meditated for generalized anxiety disorder. I’m very good at dealing with the verbal/emotional/mental abuse - this was sort of my next step in the project, being prepared to defend myself against possible physical abuse. I’ve recently started CBT though, so hopefully some aspects of…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:18 AM
3

https://getyarn.io/yarn-clip/0b0c60b6-e2fe-46c6-943e-3c4b3611d128/gif
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:13 AM
3

I agree - honestly, it’s less the yelling and more the swearing + yelling + having someone come at me all at once. I go into adrenaline overdrive. I’m probably NOT the only one, I just might be the only one who is also on FDS and trying to advocate for myself more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:12 AM
2

Thank you both so much - I agree, that’s how I was leaning. I just really struggle expressing things that affect/hurt me, as I feel like it’s mine to deal with. So it’s easier for me to just leave- but it might be helpful for him to know that it’s affecting me. Such a weird situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/21 04:09 AM
562

When I go to the 900 K part, I literally started hyperventilating. BOY BAI.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/08/21 02:37 AM
83

I think the red flag is if its effecting your time with him. My LVX would make me wait to eat to take pictures of our meals EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. He one time took his sick dog out of his bed to pose him for a picture because it was the dogs ‘birthday’ (it was a rescue, we didn’t actually know his birthday.) I don’t like having my photo taken, but he would guilt me into taking photos at every sight we went to. One time we were on a gorgeous boat ride in a foreign country’s coastal area and he spen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/21 01:18 PM
1

Oh man. I hate bachelorette parties, personally. They’re so contrived and tacky for the most part… like why not have a classy friend trip where it’s about you relaxing and focusing on yourself before this big event that’s essentially a show? Or why not just have a fancy dinner somewhere? Blerg. I had an ex who used to post these huge social declarations of love and admiration- of things he’d never say to my face, or of things I like about myself that he would then try to manipulate/gaslight me o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 04:19 PM
12

Those flare suit pants! I love him so muuuuch 😭😭🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 03:43 PM
1

This creeps me out so hard. Like, she’s a personal trainer, so she’s doing this on top of work, possibly hustling her business, taking care of herself, possibly taking care of kids. What is he bringing to the table?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 03:59 PM
14

Thank you!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 02:04 AM
24

Not a movie but a commiseration - I ended a 5 year relationship last November, leaving me single and panicking at 35. We can do this!! 💪🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 01:38 AM
13

My therapist is the fuggin best
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 02:34 AM
3

Honestly it was SO inspiring and motivating
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 02:34 AM
20

Just caught this documentary on HBO. Not only was her whole life her leveling up and dedicating everything to the pursuit of “more,” but after her relationship with Ike her views on love completely follow FDS principles. What’s more is that her solo fame (and her “true love”) came at the age of 40, WHILE she was hustling- which is total inspiration for a 35 year old 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:16 AM
25

... wut the fuq
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 10:49 PM
194

YES YES YES. This is literally what I’m working on with my therapist right now. She says “dating” should never last longer than three months unless you’re at a “FUCK YES.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 10:47 PM
2

I was literally thinking about this recently- i may have been DRAGGED by these men, but I get up every fucking time knowing that this particular situation will NEVER happen again. The walls of my castle might be DAMN high, but the reward inside is the strongest, sanest version of myself. So if you can get past them it’s a damn prize. And I can’t tell you HOW GRATEFUL I am that FDS has helped me realize that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 03:10 AM
16

Oh my god - of course, when he comes home to tell me HES hysterical and sobbing, and leaves no room for how I might feel. Such a manipulative cock.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 12:14 PM
6

THANK you! And yeah, one in a million 🚩s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 12:12 PM
98

Oh my god... my ex had an elderly dog (part of the reason I stayed so long) and towards the end , I was caring for him 4 days a week. I loved that dog so much, I was constantly covered in some kind of dog bodily fluid and meds (he HATED his meds), and holding him through seizures and attacks. When he started struggling with his back legs and walking I asked if we could put him down cause he was in pain, and got called cruel. Then a week later, the ex takes the dog in for a “routine visit” and ha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/06/21 02:48 AM
15

Omg I FEEL THIS, I was legitimately just having this conversation with my parents yesterday. I’ve been in a never ending cycle of relationships with abusive or useless men - and when I said that they said I SHOULD HAVE LOWER STANDARDS?! Keep the faith, friend ♥️♥️♥️ Edit:spelling
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 09:35 PM
1

Ooof, I get that. Yeah, a lot of these have to build up in your system before their useful so it makes sense to wait. Can you get weed where you are? It might help with the eating part?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 04:48 PM
14

Hi there! So I get severe nausea when I’m depressed and anxious too. Broth helps a lot, as do smoothies and other liquids that have high nutritional content. That said, herbal calming supplements are great, but nothing has helped me at the level that my ssri has. It’s honestly incomparable, and I can’t recommend talking to a doc about meds enough - they won’t commit you for asking after them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:11 PM
8

Says he loves strong independent women but spends the entire relationship trying to shove them into a trad wifey mold.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 03:24 PM
7

Ooof 🥵
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:33 PM
2

This just broke my brain. I get all of these ALL THE TIME
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 10:22 PM
7

TRIGGER When I was 19, I hooked up with a much older man; I wouldn’t have sex wo a condom, so he waited til I was asleep than fucked me wo one, which gave me HPV and the herp. This past year I ended a relationship with a dude who would “sleep hump” me. Knew my history, couldn’t understand why I had a problem with it because “he didn’t know what he was doing” and “it wasn’t actual sex.” Never mind that it’s already p terrifying to wake up with a 6’5” 250 lb guy on top of you, who’s actively jabbi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:22 AM
3

I’m so so sorry, love. I definitely agree - therapy and a rape crisis counselor are a big help. Stay strong ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 04:06 AM
1

👏🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:42 AM
1

My head automatically applied a ‘consequently’ at the start of your “He is no longer alive, as well” and I was like “Damn, ok 👌🏽”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:25 AM
1

OR ALL OF THE ABOVE?! 🤔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:16 AM
6

My therapist was an early single mom by choice, and did so late in life... I can’t tell you how thankful I am for someone who supports “you can have a kid whenever you’re ready”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:14 AM
3

YO IS THAT A THING THAT HAPPENS?! 👀 man, I’ve been lucky if I get one...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 03:11 AM
9

Not gonna lie, ima super romantic at heart, so COVID is helping a LOT. After my last break up I got a “boy” haircut, a cadillac of a vibrators, and am trying to stop reading romance novels in favor of literature, feminist tracts and self help books, so that’s all helping too 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/21 01:13 PM
15

The Men-Rating Underground 🧐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/21 01:07 PM
43

Thisssss. I went to couples counseling with my manipulative ex because I couldn’t “get happy” with him, regardless of what a “great guy” everyone kept telling me he was. His sob story (paternal abandonment, death of grandparents that helped raise him, divorce, high-stress job) outweighed EVERYTHING, and our therapist treated everything like adjustments I needed to make for being neurotic. And after any session where I spoke my mind, I’d get the silent treatment, or he’d be just plain rude and su…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/04/21 01:05 PM
168

THANK YOU!!! I hit 19 dating an abusive pedophile, so naturally the trauma of that meant adult life didn’t start til 25 - society’s emphasis on youth and young success stories (30 under 30) has made it hard to see how far I’ve come at 35.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 01:27 PM
10

Holy shit, he’s pissed because she won’t be His mommy, just the cats. How self centered and self important can you get?! Also LOL at a week and her not reaching out- bai girl, hope “standing up” to someone about loving their pet was worth it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:37 AM
10

(Confused White man gif)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:32 AM
109

This is definitely not an accident after once (and that once better be a radical outlier like baby was somehow covered in olive oil and wiggly). Oh my god, how. How. How. I fucking love babies and kids and have put off having one for YEARS because they deserve me at my best and this schmucks just hanging out dropping his daughter like Meghan Thee Stallion drops hits?! Nah fuck that. Someone get them outta there before I kick the door down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 05:31 AM
5

Yes it is! I love the story 🥰
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 02:30 AM
82

I love him so much for being the change.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 10:00 PM
40

You got me DED. 🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 05:51 PM
10

I have one male best friend I trust with my life - we started dating, which devolved into us just having our decompression days (video games, movies, beer and pizza) together (give me a pass, I was a dumb baby). We broke up, didn’t see each other for two years, met up again at a mutual friends birthday party, and have been BFF since. But like - he’s very, very special. Really smart, kind, helpful, raised by a single mom, and actually fucking listens. Over our friendship we’ve pushed each other t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 05:02 PM
23

MODERN DAY HERO 👑 can I get a prayer candle of your mom to put on my aspirations alter?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:55 PM
13

I’ve never heard of this guy, thank god. This sounds like the reason most women don’t care about letting their BFs drag them along into dumb situations or sit at home and play video games all day - at least no ones putting a rat trap near their vag. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:52 PM
120

“A girl I like told me about another guy 😫” “my girlfriend suggested I get off the couch, stop playing video games and go for a walk because of the covid 19 lbs I gained” “my sister started dating a guy I don’t approve of, and she told me it wasn’t my business WAHHHHHH”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:48 PM
35

https://youtu.be/qr3wH4u4xus
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:45 PM
7

WE STAN A QUEEEEEENNNNN. (Edit: Typo. Dammit Petros!)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:42 PM
219

Ohohhoho BOY LET ME TELL YOU. I used to think porn was fine/good (I am working on myself in that aspect rn, especially since learning so much on here about how predatory and abusive it is) and loved porn of jacked guys with huge dicks. My self proclaimed “secure” ex could NOT stand it. Mocked my choices, whined about “why was I even dating him,” asked why I would masturbate to porn when I had him, etc etc. He would get SO insecure and jealous, and yet thought it was fine for him to follow dozens…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/21 04:37 PM
12

Maya Angelou has some of my favorites: https://www.goalcast.com/2017/04/03/maya-angelou-quotes-to-inspire-your-life/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 11:23 PM
319

I’m so fucking livid right now. This fucking asshole will say something like this IN FRONT OF PPL to a woman on meds and pain and probably a fuck ton of adrenaline, and think he’s IN THE RIGHT, and then, after clearly losing his wife and child for a period of time, still think he’s in the right?! This is the type of fucker who will progress to abuse, cheat on you with the nanny, leave you with no money and three kids in your late 40s. Fucking run girl. RUN. The one saving grace is clearly the do…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 11:20 PM
10

I love this - it’s so so true. As a strong competent woman I’ve been called all of these and more, and it’s always work to stay authentic. But the alternatives are not worth it. Stay strong bud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 04:38 AM
63

Well we love this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 01:37 AM
130

THIIIIIIS!! I had one friend who went back to a man THREE TIMES cause she was lonely. Completely killed me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 09:58 PM
3

Thank you, haha!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 07:18 PM
7

OOOOFF, too real girl. 🙅🏻‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:38 PM
5

Ugh I’m so inspired by and proud of you! Rock 2021, babe!! 👑
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:38 PM
28

Ugh, who withholds this information?! This is frickin early days conversations, Oi 🙄 and yeah, I’m shocked he didn’t use it as an excuse to not wear a condom
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:33 PM
3

I’m so glad to have helped in some small way! I 2nd u/Phoenix_Rising - FDS level up helped me a lot. Also lots of small things that built my motivation. Good luck!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:30 PM
1

It’s like once you start valuing yourself, everything and everyone else starts valuing you too!! 😝 Glad to see you’re getting a glow up too!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:28 PM
2

Thank you! It’s been an awesome three months and just had to share.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:25 PM
1

Thank you so much! This community has been so supportive and amazing, I couldn’t ask for more, lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:24 PM
1

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:22 PM
2

THANK YOU SO MUCH!! 🖤🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:21 PM
1

Meeee tooooo, lol. Thank you!! 🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:17 PM
2

Thank you so much! 🤗🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:17 PM
2

🤗🖤 thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:16 PM
3

🤗♥️🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:16 PM
2

Thank you so much!! I’m super excited with how this years going 🥰🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:16 PM
1

OH I PLAN TO, lol. Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:15 PM
1

Anything and everything positive is welcome and appreciated! Thank you 🖤🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:14 PM
3

Haha, I love that imagery! Thank you so much! 🖤🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:14 PM
1

Thank you! It’s so nice to hear people say that 🖤🤗
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:13 PM
2

Also I love your handle!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:11 PM
1

Omg me too! 2020 wasn’t as bad for me as it was for some people, but it still wasn’t great. 2021 has just been trending up and I couldn’t be more thankful. And thank YOU for your kind words!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:11 PM
2

Lol, I think we’ve all been there (me googling NVM when I first started here). Thank you so much! I agree - I’m always inspired by the glow ups on here, so I had to share!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:09 PM
2

Thank you!! 🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:08 PM
1

Thanks!! 🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:08 PM
1

Thank you! A friend of mine got me started following the manifestation babe and I love her take on the theory. It’s been so helpful to get me back to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:08 PM
1

Workin on it, that’s for sure ♥️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:07 PM
2

🥰🖤😘
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:06 PM
1

Thank you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:06 PM
2

Thank you so much!! Last year was rough but so far this year is doing it’s best to remind me that I’m awesome and deserve everything I want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:06 PM
4

Ew, David!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 04:51 AM
11

Glad she had time in her busy bro down schedule to tell all us ladies why were jerks
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 04:50 AM
36

🔥🔥🔥🔥
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 03:13 AM
105

I hope he tries to call her to break up with her and SHE NEVER PICKS UP
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/03/21 10:38 PM
72

I love SVU and this is only part of the reason why.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 06:52 PM
1

Anyone else get reported for this 🤣🤦🏽‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 03:53 AM
2

No, it’s absolutely smart to post here! I think you’re doing a very admirable thing, staying with your mom and brothers 🖤 I’m latinx and it’s very much the same in our culture. I’m sorry you’re having to go through this; best of luck and safety to you as well! 🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:17 PM
3

Ok! Which Country are you in? Is it possible to get campus housing or some sort of reduced housing where you are? Happy to help research if you want!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:32 PM
1

Totally a hobby! And I love this project. I did this a couple years ago and it led to some skills with makeup I’m really proud of!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 05:16 PM
46

Or finds some berries and gets typhus!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:42 AM
144

I hope this guy dies of dysentery, what a total waste of skin
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 02:19 AM
8

Omg my ex made a new Twitter account?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:15 AM
6

🍆🔪 ¯_(ツ)_/¯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:14 AM
2

Maybe take a self defense class? I know I found that to be incredibly empowering and uplifting
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 01:12 AM
17

Babe, your life is about to get a glow up for real. You’re about to dump 150-200 dumb as fuck, lying pounds. A) he lied to you. Fuck that. B) even IF you were ok with porn WHO PAYS FOR SOMETHING THATS FREE. C) He consciously did something he knows you didn’t want. D) how much better are you going to feel when you get all that toxicity out of your life?! I recently ended a relationship of 5 years. It was TERRIFYING and I had a week where I didn’t get out of bed. But Ive remarked multiple times in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:30 PM
13

It might be naive, but I do think there are non porn-sick non pedo me out there who would find you beautiful and sexy and love you the way you deserve to be loved. It might take you longer, but don’t settle for less. My heart is with you 🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:18 PM
7

Bb, how old are you? Is he bothering you in anyway? Have you talked to your mom about this? Is there a timeline for him leaving? Is there any family or friends you could stay with til hes gone? Sorry for all these questions, but I think you deserve to be comfortable where you live. Let’s see if FDS can help you brainstorm!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:14 PM
6

Ok, so; how can you leave? Do you have any interest in nursing? A lot of countries have a deficit of nurses and will give out working visas for nurses. Also, Denmark (one of the best countries for women) has a work holiday program for Canada: https://www.canada.ca/en/immigration-refugees-citizenship/services/canadians/international-experience-canada/work-travel-denmark.html maybe do that and spend your year networking to make connections that enable you to move? I dunno, I find attempting big ch…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:05 PM
1

You did the right thing, 100%- this never would’ve gone anywhere
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 01:58 PM
17

🤮 WHAT THE FUCK IS WITH MEN?!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 05:14 PM
25

It’s not an excuse for his behavior by any means - our job is to always be better than what came before - but he had a shitty childhood that led to him doing drugs since he was a preteen, if I remember right? Dunno about the other two, but that might have something to do with his weathered look, at least... and a lack of sunscreen probably 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/21 12:34 PM
4

He’s just mad he spent all that time training and I would accidentally step on him if I walked past him on the street with my 5’11” ‘built like a man’ fine as fuck ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/21 03:12 AM
3

That’s a really good point. My side hustle wardrobe has a look that might work and I do love that...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 09:11 PM
2

EW ASTROPHYSICS BARBIE, wth random dude. You’re definitely right, though, I think it might be time to look.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:55 PM
3

Thank you! These people are from a separate department that were collaborating with, and their team has a very strange internalized culture of passive aggression and entitlement. My coworkers on my team are great. My direct boss is great, too, but our department director is constantly cutting her legs out from under her and telling her our team has to do certain tasks or projects to make life easier for other teams... so it’s unhealthy from a few different angles.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:54 PM
6

Sadly, you’re probably right. The place I work has a fantastic mission, which is what has kept me there so long... but if they can’t extend that mission to their own employees... it kinda of doesn’t play...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:47 PM
3

I’ve definitely done this before too and found that it works with most people! Definitely great advice, thank you... I should try it here...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:46 PM
6

I definitely don’t have fuck off money, but that’s definitely my fault - I’ve spent a lot on my side hustle and travel, and I need to rebuild my coffers... I am currently working on two business ideas this year which will help me with that, AND have some promising leads on my side hustle. So that’s something to look forward to. I definitely do have job options - but I suspect the thought of me being a long term employee makes them think I WONT leave. Maybe it’s time to prove that wrong once and …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:43 PM
6

I’m 6ft tall and wear glasses everyday 😂 a hopeless case! No, but I get what you mean. I used to do a lot more of the “dress for the job you want” tactic, but I found it both uncomfortable and frustrating that I had to do business drag to get taken seriously. But it is something to think about again now that I’m working with people for whom it seems to be a necessity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 06:17 PM
3

4 - you sniped me with that one my god lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:54 AM
8

7- the highly curated social media, the staging events/situations for pics, the getting mad if things didn’t work out exactly how he wanted and he could get “the” pic. A grown ass man in his 40s. The line for me was when he had a birthday party for his dog, who was turning 15. After a while the poor thing puked, I brought him inside and got him comfortable in his dog bed with water close by in a cool room - he started complaining that he had wanted to get a pic of the dog in a birthday crown wit…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:35 AM
3

I feel like this needs to be asked: what does the mom want? She might want her own goddamn space too, lol. Edit: not that this changes HIS worth, just what came to mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 05:12 AM
3

This - I usually laugh at how absurdly I die. And he’s playing an mmo? Bruh you’re gonna die. The challenge is the fun. What a dumb fuck
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 04:41 AM
56

Sometimes when I break up with another ex, I worry that my male role model was too good - my dad cooks more than 75% of the meals, works FT, supported my mom through two degrees, taught me how to fix basic things and do woodworking, takes care of the groceries and banking - but then I realize it means I’ll never settle for this shit and like... thank fuck tbh. I wanted to rip off so many balls after reading this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/21 01:18 AM
5

Right?! RIGHT?! My ex was a love bomber and I literally lived in terror on holidays and big events that he would suddenly be on one knee
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/21 03:20 AM
76

If he’s like this at 25, just wait til 35.... and 45.... and 55... (cackles gleefully)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 05:36 PM
26

Oh my god, I was mid heavy WWE watching when that proposal happened and it put me off him SO FREAKIN MUCH. I do NOT trust men who propose in front of a crowd and in THE RING?! Gag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/21 12:39 PM
28

Different Dudes: 1) Being 35 when I was 19. 2) Still being best friends with an ex... when they had been together for TEN YEARS and had only broken up 2 months before we met. 3) Love bombing the HELL out of me - which looked like nice gifts, but was a symptom of the larger issue of him constantly disregarded my boundaries and comfort.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/21 07:18 AM
6

I tried this once and motherfucker LIT UP. “I love pegging!!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 01:24 PM
17

I got to the “if you’re gonna tell me how to do it, go ahead and do it yourself” quote and saw red. Goddamn. The thing with cleanliness is respect. Yes, you can operate on your own timeline if you live alone, but if you live with someone else you have to imagine how this might effect them. Which is something we don’t socialize men to do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 01:16 PM
73

“Property” made me grind down my back molars.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/21 12:59 PM
33

Oh weird, I didn’t know south London was dirt road rural, with no busses, trains, trams, taxis, ride sharing...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/21 12:51 PM
6

I’m SCREAMING
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/21 02:09 AM
5

I love her SO. MUCH. My god 🖤🖤👍🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 09:52 PM
3

I definitely think that if you address a concern and they don’t spend time discussing it with you or allowing you to focus on it is a red flag. Sometimes we can project onto a therapist, but I think the difference between projection and actual problems is that they listen and respond and inquire deeper and don’t take feedback personally. I definitely think feeling condescended to is a yellow flag, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 09:52 PM
22

THANK you. My role model for this is a close friend who was a single mum when we met. Her son attended so many damn girls nights he’s probably more of a feminist than me (and I’d probably be great at Minecraft). Too many women buy into “starting a family means no more friendships,” and I’m dying to see that change. 🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/01/21 08:58 PM
12

Just to note I am sensitive to this because I have it (got it from rape), so take what I say with a grain of salt. I’d hate to think I can’t be a HVW because of it lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 05:35 AM
14

I agree with that, just the phrase of “a HVM won’t have STDs” - I think an HVM MIGHT have an STD like herpes, but WOULD be upfront about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 05:33 AM
15

I agree with 99% of this but I do feel there is some issue here around STDs. A lot of people lie about having STDs and can get “tricked” into getting them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/21 04:23 AM
90

Ugh I forgot how incredible she was in this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/21 12:11 AM
38

This poor girl. This is my biggest fear in having kids - there’s so much you can’t control, you can’t help them with, you can only prep them. 🤦🏻‍♀️ this is how Id wind up beating up a teenage boy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 04:43 AM
49

YESSSS. I has a break up recently and the friends whose response made me happiest are the ones who congratulated me 🖤🖤🖤
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/21 04:34 AM
1

🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/21 07:19 AM
13

I’m now the age (35) of the man I dated when I was 19. I Now have mentees in their late teens and they’re so incredibly immature and innocent and undeveloped I couldn’t begin to imagine even considering them friends (listening to me whine?! Giving me advice? Taking my problems into their headspace already busy with college and growing and learning?), never mind dating them 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/21 09:42 PM
25

I HIGHLY doubt he’s perfect in every other way. This sounds like a sign of OCD or other mental illness; I’m willing to bet he’s hiding a bunch of other stuff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/21 03:23 PM
10

I had another ex who thought black face was HILARIOUS... and now has a kid with a black woman. I genuinely can’t IMAGINE the micro aggressions in that house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 11:01 PM
30

I’m CRYING
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:18 PM
7

Ugh, I love her. Instant TikTok follow!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:17 PM
101

WHERE’S MY CAUSE?! 😂 Oh my god this is my ex who got pissed whenever I complained about inequality and the undeserved superiority of white men. “Babe, saying that is just as bad!” As thousands of years of colonialism and oppression. Oh yeah, you right... 😐
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:11 PM
209

Yes! I AM proud of you this is HUGE! I’m new to FDS and I don’t know if I could do that yet 🤣 amazing work!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/01/21 01:00 PM
19

This had me DEAD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:42 PM
11

I thought that for a minute but... I find it too believable that a guy would just want to get off and get out 🤬
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:42 PM
24

It’s about ~the chase~ and bragging rights. 🙄🖕🏽🖕🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:41 PM
20

Giving.... But not for too long
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:39 PM
14

He’s ~evolved~ beyond sex. He needs that time for other things. Like video games and doomscrolling and OF.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:39 PM
29

He’s gonna die alone “lol”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:36 PM
17

He’s got video games to play ¯_(ツ)_/¯
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/21 12:35 PM
29

This explains a lot about my boss 👎🏽
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:19 PM
338

This reminds me of a story from Tina Fey’s Bossypants about Amy Poehler: “Amy Poehler was new to SNL and we were all crowded into the seventeenth-floor writers' room, waiting for the Wednesday night read-through to start. [...] Amy was in the middle of some such nonsense with Seth Meyers across the table, and she did something vulgar as a joke. I can't remember what it was exactly, except it was dirty and loud and "unladylike", Jimmy Fallon [...] turned to her and in a faux-squeamish voice said,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:17 PM
46

I’m CRYING Lolol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:11 PM
12

Like... women do this for each other all the time. STEP IT UP MEN
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 04:23 AM
13

Fu.cking.ped.o.PHILES.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 04:21 AM
6

I’m so so proud of you. You’re so brave and strong and smart and awesome for getting out of this and bettering yourself- high five!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:28 AM
5

Dwight Shrute?! Is that you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:20 AM
19

I needed this post today. I got out of a 5 year relationship this year at 35, and so much of the internet is telling me I’ve lost out and it’s over. While I’m working on being ok with the forever alone idea, sometimes it gets hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:19 AM
14

If it bleeds 🤮🤮🤮🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/21 12:17 AM
99

THIS THISTHIS THIIIIIIIS!!! Thank you for saying all of this. Small everyday changes are so often overlooked in treatment in ~mass media~ but they really are what make a difference. I’ve been dealing with generalized anxiety disorder and minor depression for years- medicated and in therapy, looking for CBT now - and even as an introvert who loves me time, I have dark pandemic days/weeks. (I think I slept through 1/3 of this past week). I’ve been with so many men who either WONT do therapy or do …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 05:07 PM
2

The ~optics~ so he can bitch “I always bought her expensive bouquets and she never appreciated them” 🖕🏽 meanwhile I tell my best friend ONCE and...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/21 04:02 PM
18

I almost downvoted this it made me so mad at him 🤣 what a choad
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 11:12 PM
13

Yes! If they talk about their job (or side hustle their job funds) with excitement, what their planned next steps are, what their ultimate goal is with it and their path there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 10:10 PM
42

This!!! My ex bought me flowers almost every week but never retained my favorite, EVEN when I would point them out over and over. He thought the cost was more impt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 10:08 PM
100

One of the HUGE WAVING RED FLAGS for me is that all he talks about is how she made HIM feel what she did FOR him, and then mocks the ONE thing she’s mentioned. Self involved, self apologist who wants to be catered to and not have to try. I bet he doesn’t even have a job because of his ADD. One of my exes didn’t have any college and he made six figures working for the state. This old sad sack is so FOS his eyes are brown. This post is probably just a ploy to get some other woman to feel bad for h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/21 10:07 PM
86

I’m so offended- Oscar is way more HV than most of my exes. Rude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 04:36 AM
7

2 RILL 4 ME
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 04:35 AM
4

Also wire cutters, gloves, and a tool tip set for screwdriver/drills!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 04:32 AM
15

THISSSSS!!!! I was raised by a general contractor, so I do EVERYTHING myself. My (recent, so this is a rant, lol) ex hired people for everything - general repair, painting, tree trimming, MOWING (and I’m not talking teens), cleaning - and wouldn’t let me do anything because he didn’t like being shown up by a woman. One of my big red flags was when he called me, literally hysterical, about a plumbing issue I had told him he was having for months. He hadn’t gotten fixed, and the month earlier he h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/21 04:30 AM
57

He talks about flirting in high school, and being disappointed he didn’t “act on it” - bro, that’s not puppy “love” you’re after, it’s either an obsession with teen girls or virginity. But based on the ~few~ times he’s had sex, and the way he talks about the women who HAVE made the bad choice to sleep with him? He probably smells, doesn’t take care of himself, stays inside all day and is a creep to everyone he comes in contact with. Total Predator on wheels. Throw the whole thing away. Edit: cha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/21 03:52 PM
36

He’s definitely cheating on her, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 12:42 AM
38

IM SO FUCKING PROUD OF THEM. Ugh, if only my dumbass had been this smart at 19, I wouldn’t have had to go through my trash fire 34 yo ex!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/20 12:18 AM
2

Latinx here, and first generation US citizen... there’s a lot to unpack here! Like you, lunchbox teasing (kids + black beans = instant humiliation) and cultural suppression from outside; internally a lot on ingrained and subconscious virtue modeling for machismo, putting all men in a one mile radius before you, marriage being more important than the partner, making it work even when things aren’t great... That said, both my parents are pretty darn HV. My mom went from dirt poor to CEO, and my da…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/20 01:15 AM
23

Hey, is pink giraffe taking new patients?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/20 12:09 AM
6

KILLING IT!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/20 04:29 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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