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View 1 posts and 88 comments by 4herlight on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
34

4herlight/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/20 10:10 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
8

I don't think I would want to date someone who's just trying to get "rewarded" with intimacy/sex. Euughh. Is there anyone out there who's NOT like this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 02:25 AM
5

Well, in a way, yes, we must... Not of him specifically, he was caught and is no longer alive. However, because of the way our culture socializes men (and the fact that the USA's mental health care system is a massive failure at preventing this kind of violent behavior) we do still have to be careful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 02:17 AM
1

"Haunted by a Victorian feminist ghost" GOALS! I hope I get possessed by Voltairine de Cleyre.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 01:56 AM
2

These scrotes DON'T CARE about the clit. They only care about what serves them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 01:36 AM
15

I mean tbh in most porn videos I've ever seen the male actors will only pay attention to the clit for maybe like 30 seconds... (and then spend the rest of the time focused on the man's pleasure, of course). And then men translate this to real life. They go down on you, badly, for a minute or so and expect that to be satisfactory. smh... This is part of why I'm not really a fan of men using porn. It sets unrealistic expectations, whether they realize it or not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/20 01:34 AM
31

Oh ok, I get you. But my point still stands. Ladies: tear open your boyfriends today! You deserve to know the truth!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 07:56 PM
33

Oh yes, better slice him open and find out if he’s actually a stack of teddy bears wearing a human man suit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/20 06:19 PM
4

I think too many people get caught up on wanting a baby, without actually stopping to think about how they are creating a person that didn’t exist before and what that really means. Exactly! It's one of the biggest responsibilities I can imagine, to create life, and also condemn another living being to the inevitable suffering that is part of existing in this world. It is very serious!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 09:10 AM
3

I am totally fine with never having children. It wasn't on my agenda, anyway. There's no guarantee they will turn out into good adults or be there for you in your old age. There's no guarantee that other family members will be there for you either. Mine sure hasn't. I also HATE the idea of raising children with NO family members to love and support us. So, I'm just trying to find my own chosen family of friends. I have only a couple of people I can trust, but it's better than nothing. My fantasy…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/20 08:58 AM
5

True. You can also learn a lot about a man's character and value by how they go about rejecting you (or how they handle being rejected).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 03:29 PM
5

Totally. The same thing happened to me this year. The guy was smart, decent, and treated me very well, but I figured if I couldn't even stand kissing him, then what's the point????
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/20 03:27 PM
2

I agree with you. Cosigned 100%. Who do you think should be responsible for stimulating the clitoris during sex, though? The woman or her partner? It's convenient if the woman does it herself during penetration, but sometimes I feel like it's also lazy on the man's part if he doesn't make it happen. Like why is he even there, then? Is he redundant if he isn't doing most of the contribution to making the woman orgasm?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 02:19 PM
49

I started demanding better, and that has resulted in... a completely dead dating life. No one meets my standards. I feel sad and lonely sometimes, but I'm a lot less angry and hurt anymore, which I think was worse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/20 11:05 AM
4

I hear you. At this point, I’ve given up on finding an HVM, and my hope is to find some kind of life partner... I’d be fine living with good women friends in my old age.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/20 12:13 PM
1

What’s worse?: A man who pays for sex, or a man who uses dishonesty and manipulation to get it for free?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 06:51 AM
4

It’s already happened. There’s coronavirus joke porn drawings floating around the net.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/20 06:43 AM
20

Yeah there’sa big difference between “you’re being too sensitive!” and “I can see I hurt you, I messed up and I’m sorry”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/20 07:43 PM
37

The only excuse is manual/electrical labor, while you’re at work. Then again, non-conductive silicone rings are a thing now...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/02/20 10:46 PM
27

A guy called me “stuck up” for not talking to him. At first I was annoyed, but it’s hilarious now. Especially the fact that even YEARS later this guy crawls out of the woodwork to bother me sometimes. He has a history of doing this to other girls in my area, too. This kind of shit is a RED FLAG! 🚩
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/02/20 01:05 AM
4

Made my day
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 08:35 PM
68

I’d love it if this was changed to say “He’s a douchebag!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 03:11 AM
1

https://youtu.be/lXOPzScgqdo 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/02/20 01:13 AM
13

YES!!! I love the Golden Girls, and I’d totally be down for spending my old age with good female friends... minus the romantic history Dorothy had. She’s the perfect example of what being a pick-me will get you in the end...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/02/20 11:37 PM
3

Needed this. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 11:44 PM
16

This has been so hard for me to come to terms with lately emotionally. I can’t help but feel sad and lonely seeing so many of my friends happily married and partnered (Funny enough.... the happiest ones are gay/lesbian). Being attracted to men feels like a curse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 11:17 PM
21

Exactly. Over and over again, I see LVM crossing the line of being a piece of shit, over to being an abusive and dangerous piece of shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 11:13 PM
23

They don’t see women as human beings.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/20 11:09 PM
9

My rotation is pretty empty right now, so I’ll probably go out dancing with my friends. Other than that, I’ll probably buy myself some candy and go fuck myself. Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 10:16 PM
20

Fake news. Most lesbians I know straight up tell me they mostly don’t even want anything to do with men! They’re surrounded by women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/20 03:59 AM
1

Other than the obvious ones listed already: • huge beards (What are you hiding?!) • face tattoos / Trashy ugly tattoos • hunchback • lazy eye. I just can’t. Where do I know to look to make eye contact properly? • shaved pubes / stubble
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/20 04:31 AM
3

If it’s more than one shirtless pic (even worse if it’s a selfie) I say nope. Put some clothes on, sir! You’re on the Internet!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 01:22 AM
5

Kinda makes me glad none of my relationships passed the year and a half mark... Onward! To better days!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 10:32 PM
1

Oh yes, I’m definitely not obligated! At least I could view this as a learning experience... training up my “hmm... nope” muscles. 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 04:43 AM
6

I don’t think it was a mistake on my part, since I don’t want to end up in a loveless relationship down the line. I guess part of me is afraid there may not be much of a “next” for me. I’m still struggling with coming to terms of the possibility of being single the rest of my life (which I realize is still better than a bad relationship).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 01:28 AM
16

Argh. I needed to read this. I’ve been on a few dates now with a nice guy who’s really put a lot of effort in... but I just don’t feel into him. Part of me irrationally worries I won’t be able to find someone else that will treat me this good, but I shouldn’t settle...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/01/20 08:06 AM
7

All the good men have cooked themselves dinner, and are relaxing, in a house they cleaned, about to suck their own dicks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/01/20 10:02 PM
37

Watch out for guys of other ethnicities that act like they’re (ugh) “race climbing” with you. I (a white woman) dated a Mexican guy and he acted like he had a trophy white girl, in a weird creepy fetishy kind of way, and wanted to try to get access to my money and resources and shit. Basically wanted me to be his fuckmommy and bank. Yeah I noped tf out of there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/01/20 11:45 PM
15

Probably the same reasoning as to why conservative men are so against abortion: keep women poor and dependent, popping out more future slaves for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/01/20 11:39 PM
19

Shoving someone is physical aggression, by definition. If it’s an action that can get him in trouble in public with anyone else, it’s definitely not OK to do to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/20 05:05 AM
2

The one worth reading is The Satanic Witch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 09:29 PM
13

Anton LaVey (I do take his writings with a grain of salt, but it’s interesting to think about) said that most men are typically sexually attracted to a higher level of nakedness (more skin showing) and stereotypical femininity (feminine clothing, glamour, long hair, etc). So those could be the factors that are getting those results. They’re really quite simple and even stupid sometimes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 12:42 AM
19

Lana's lyrics (who writes them?) are deeply troubling... the narrator has a very sad existence. Kinda like The Weeknd.... that man in the songs needs serious help.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 04:50 AM
1

Your son is lucky to have a mom like you who really cares about his well-being. Congrats on your divorce. Keep on moving, better days are ahead!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/20 09:20 PM
2

If you can't trust him, it's a bad sign. I had been through this before some years ago, I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, but he eventually did reveal that he actually cheated. It's easier to break up over the phone. And if he broke your trust, you really don't owe it to him to do it in person, and it may even be a better idea for your emotional and physical safety not to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/20 09:04 PM
2

It was a red dress, and a big stuffed bra!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/20 04:27 AM
2

I know this topic is old, but I couldn't help but chime in. Fds always reminds me of the episode where Blanche tries to give Sophia a sexy makeover and advice to impress a guy. Sophia returns home after their date, and Dorothy asks, "Did you sleep with him?" And Sophia sheepishly says, "...A little." If I remember correctly, she confessed her love for the guy but he couldn't say it back, so Sophia was upset at the advice she was given.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/20 02:36 AM
2

I have to confess... I've been on that website only to try to see if a guy I was dating was on there, cause if he's looking for a SB, it's a deal-breaker for me personally. (Now, I have nothing against SBs at all, but I don't want to date a man who would buy sex/intimacy.) Thankfully, he wasn't. lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/01/20 07:58 PM
14

Needed this today...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 11:41 AM
2

"If Your Kisses Can't Hold the Man You Love (Then Your Tears Won't Bring Him Back)" by Sophie Tucker
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 10:50 AM
2

Even if you are unattractive, you still don't deserve to be treated with anything less than respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 10:13 AM
16

I can empathize with this. It's really not easy. But what could help is to express your feelings elsewhere, so you don't have to keep it all in and make yourself crazy. Write it down in a journal, a poem, or any other creative mode of choice... and keep it to yourself. Someday later on you can look back on it and have a nice memory, or a valuable creative work... or if it doesn't work out with the guy, you can look back and laugh or see it as a learning experience.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 08:56 AM
30

Not sure if a man who doesn't eat out is necessarily gay (or asexual???), but he's certainly an automatic NEXT from me... I can't date a man who feels like he needs to put on a fucking hazmat suit to go down on me. I know I'm clean and good, so that "ew" attitude is so offensive to me, I won't accept it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 07:04 AM
8

This is so sad, just yet another reason to be childfree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 06:57 AM
9

I think a HVM would want to please the woman, whatever that happens to consist of. He'd be happy to even have the privilege of touching her. And if he's lucky, he'll get some pleasure, too. But that's in an ideal world.....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 06:53 AM
9

I was under the impression that it was a riff on "ethnic" sounding names common among black women, such as "Keisha"... Like, why does the woman with problems have to be black? IDK.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 06:46 AM
9

So true. Relationships should be adding to your life, not taking away. I have to deal with enough of people's BS at work... why would I ever volunteer to be emotionally drained on unpaid time?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 10:14 PM
44

Yep. And we can also take away from this: Men's bad behavior is not because of a woman not being good enough. Don't beat yourself up, beat them up instead (jk... lol).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 09:50 PM
18

Agree with you that "pickmeisha" is questionable. I've been thinking that for a while. Wasn't "pick-me" enough?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 09:47 PM
13

Sex is too personal to make such broad, sweeping generalizations with lists of kinks. I think what a man SHOULD be doing in the bedroom is having an open communication. It can start with a simple, "what turns you on?"... In this conversation, you should probably hear from him things like: "I'm into (blank), but if you're not comfortable, we don't have to do that." or, "I don't really get off much on (blank), but I'll do it if you want me to." and importantly, "I want you to feel good, I want to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 09:41 PM
5

I just don't agree here. For example, from an early age, I was interested in bondage before I was ever interested in guys or anything sexual. It came seemingly out of nowhere. No childhood trauma. How can that be explained away?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 05:27 PM
11

Sometimes I like to hear cutesy names in bed, cause it kinda turns me on, but otherwise I prefer to hear my name because it's personal. People usually respond more strongly emotionally to hearing their own name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 06:50 AM
3

If a guy does that kind of thing, he's not a HVM. Buh-bye!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 06:19 AM
2

This is so true. The ex I dumped -- who was unfaithful, even -- people were telling me he seemed soooo depressed!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 11:12 AM
3

Self-destructive..... yes, that sums it up in a way I've never been able to put into words. It's a hard pill to swallow. We've got to treat multi-dating like job searching or hiring... you've got to do the interviews. Plural.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 09:20 AM
9

DON'T give up your surveillance tactics. Only confront him with the evidence IF you're trying to interrogate him to get more information AND he's not giving it up. Otherwise just tell him he sucks, and break up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/01/20 07:13 AM
27

"Comedians" -- they can try to use it as an excuse for any hurtful jokes or negging under the guise of kidding, or "God, you're so uptight/sensitive, where's your sense of humor?" Also tend to be broke and prone to a wandering eye, especially if they travel for performances.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 06:57 PM
3

I'm so sorry... It's NOT your fault he chose to behave like a disgusting monster. Thank you for sharing your advice and experience to help others try to stay safe. The suffering is not in vain.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 11:11 PM
8

Whoa that is savage...... high five! Lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/01/20 06:14 AM
1

In no particular order of importance: Lose 30 to 50 pounds Continue "looksmaxxing" and improving health Read more enriching books Take dance classes — making my inner child proud of me Get out to at least 1 social event a month Declutter my living space / make mindful spending decisions Stop letting my anger get the best of me. Not a good look.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/19 04:53 AM
1

"I'm not ready." is a complete sentence. You don't owe him an explanation. Your feelings are valid.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/12/19 01:38 AM
8

Freaking out is also the wrong way to correct a dog's behavior. So if a man does that he's surely an idiot as well
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 07:23 PM
1

Chimps are violent af.......
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 07:21 PM
1

What if you didn't remove your pubic hair if/when you decide to have sex? Do you think a HVM would not care?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 10:51 AM
5

Self-care to the max; people here have commented good suggestions for that. Get closer to platonic friends and family so you won't isolate and get rusty on your other social skills. Reading a lot helps me... self help, educational, deep philosophical material. Try to find meaning in your life other than relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 10:47 AM
3

Novelty and conquest.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 10:41 AM
4

It's not always easy (or possible, especially if you struggle with mental health issues) every day to love yourself, but you must always ACCEPT yourself, and take care of yourself. That's hard enough.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 08:12 AM
1

Yeah. It's a serious choice to make. I don't think I'll ever live with a partner again unless we're engaged to be married...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 06:32 AM
10

If I were you, and I felt like I absolutely had to have the closure of responding, I'd just tell him to eat shit. Block.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 12:17 AM
2

SECONDED. He sounds like my leech of an ex. Staying out at bars and was pushing me to let him move in with me. Fuck no! Don't mess around with tenant stuff, it can get UGLY enough even when it's involving someone you're not dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 12:14 AM
2

I used to think this way, too. I thought my boyfriend just liked to drink at bars a lot (maybe too much)... then I came to pick him up (ugh, I know) a little early and caught him flirting with some girl. Some time later, while I was dumping him, he admitted to me he did cheat once but "didn't have the chance" to tell me. Bulllllllshitttt. Something is wrong, and you can feel it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/12/19 12:04 AM
4

"A lawyer will think of stuff you haven't even dreamed of yet." THIS! I (fortunately) haven't needed a lawyer to deal with marriage/divorce issues, but I have needed them for estate execution and landlord/tenant issues. Never assume you got it handled just with information you've read. Whenever there's potential drama and high stakes, you NEED a professional to help cover your ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/12/19 12:37 AM
20

YES. PUNISH HIM!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/19 11:02 PM
6

Lmao 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/19 10:50 PM
41

Even married middle class women in the 1800s would sometimes be pushed into sex work for extra income. Tell me again how easy women had it in olden days? Pshh!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/12/19 10:46 PM
11

THIS. This is one of my biggest fears...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/12/19 10:35 AM
7

Growth rarely happens in a straight upward line; there are usually ups and downs and twists and turns. The important thing is to keep moving. What helps me is to remember, there are essentially 2 mindsets. A fixed mindset: "Everything always goes this way." And a growth mindset: "Things can and do change, there are choices I can make to change my future." If you find yourself slipping into that "always, never" ultimate limited way of thinking, remind yourself that NOTHING is constant or permanen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 03:04 AM
22

Shuddering at the thought... how horrific! I thought hormonal birth control and IUDS etc were rough enough on us already...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 02:50 AM
9

Tell em you're taking Judo classes? Or better yet, actually do it? Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/12/19 01:44 AM
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