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Abracadanielle Archive

View 4 posts and 179 comments by Abracadanielle on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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10

You think feminists are against child prostitution because of jealousy? This also explains why feminists in Europe are campaigning against legal prostitution today. Source? As an American feminist, I've seen much more support of making sex work safe and legal than against it. Granted, underage girls wouldn't fall under either the "safe" or "legal" category.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/14 11:27 PM
2

For me, yes, the language is a big part of the problem. It strikes me as unnecessarily hateful and also toxic. That's a large chunk of the criticism that I've seen against TRP. So much of the advice is common sense, why weigh it down and dilute it with misogyny?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/14 11:24 PM
2

Not necessarily, like I said 10 is too high for some guys. To them, it's too high. To my guy, he doesn't care. I also wouldn't date let alone marry someone who cared about partner count.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/02/14 10:50 PM
3

No one is saying you should. You should know your actions have consequences and that you should be aware of them. Do they though? I found a guy who doesn't give a crap about partner count (which isn't even that high anyway) who I plan to marry. Anyone else's opinion about my partner count doesn't matter because I'm no longer looking for a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 08:49 PM
3

You still haven't answered my question. Are you good for relationships or good for sex? Since everyone is one or the other, apparently.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 08:42 PM
7

You think everyone is either a Madonna or a Whore? Really? They're either perfect and pure or they're slutty trash, one or the other? The world is not that black and white, most things are on a spectrum. Any given person might perceive someone in a black or white way, especially during a short-term interaction, but that doesn't mean it's all that person actually is. My fiance clearly thinks I'm LTR material. But I've slept with about 10 people through my life and that's too high a partner count …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 02:19 PM
10

Also, why are you dodging my question? Why do women have to be one or the other but men can be both? You keep trying to change the subject to ask me which I "am", and I told you I'm neither.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 01:32 PM
3

Of course he has an opinion about it, just like I have an opinion of his. But that doesn't mean it affects our relationship. I've slept a decent number of people but his partner count is significantly higher. Neither of us care. We're with each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 04:37 AM
5

I dunno, can I? I'm engaged and he knows how many people I've been with and I know how many people he's been with and neither of us care. It doesn't affect our feelings for one another.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 04:30 AM
9

I'm neither, no one is purely one or the other. That's what I don't understand. TRP seems to get that men can be either slutty or desiring of monogamy at various times, but can't believe that women can transition between the two.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 04:27 AM
9

What's wrong with being one or the other? Are you one of the other? Which are you? Are you a slut, or are you pure and perfect? Which would you chose? Did I say patriarchy? Why do women have to be one or the other while men can fluidly shift between whichever suits their whims of the moment?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 04:10 AM
2

I'm not saying it was an accident, but there are reasons for why things happen. If you're told from the onset of your experience with sex and relationships that you're only worth is derived from sexual interaction, there is going to be an effect. Do you think that her first boyfriend was an asshole for treating her that way? Do you think victims of abuse should just suck it up?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 01:38 AM
3

Well, she is a victim. And I also feel for the guy. But this is part of the human experience. Relationships are work, and very few people come without baggage. This is just my own observation, but part of the TRP mindset to pursue a young and inexperienced partner is mostly a quest to find someone without baggage aka life experiences and the sort of real, complicated, gray-area stuff that happens to real people. Do you not also feel for the girl? She's had boatloads of pain and heartache. Does s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 01:14 AM
4

But if you're a man having promiscuous sex with a promiscuous woman, then later want to settle down, wouldn't you be bad relationship material as well?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:54 AM
4

Her very first boyfriend treated her like garbage, it's not unreasonable for a young woman to assume that's just how things are and have it warp her perception of sex and relationships. Yes, she was probably getting a lot of sexual pleasure out of her promiscuity, but her behavior sounds like addiction, which I don't believe should be shamed and trivialized.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:52 AM
3

Seriously? In the post, she says that she wants to be exclusive with her boyfriend (she told him she wants something casual because she's afraid of rejection, so if she's talking to someone else I don't think that counts as deception) and hopes he'll ask her to be exclusive, even though she's afraid he won't and is afraid he'll judge her for her past. Yes, she needs help and no it isn't his obligation to "fix" her. But shit, it's pretty heartless to hope he doesn't try to help.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:48 AM
3

In England, "dogging" is pretty popular, or was about five or so years ago when I was writing a paper about exhibitionism. Not only are people having sex in public, they'll announce the fact on specific websites so that other people can show up and watch.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:43 AM
3

Then why do so many marriages end in divorce? Why are most divorces filed by women? Why are women more likely to end a relationship, in general, than men? Many marriages end in divorce because divorce is legal, and no longer carries the negative social stigma it once did. Divorce is no longer the damning act it once was. As for why more women file for divorce, this is an ongoing PPD discussion. For one, another user, I don't recall who, pointed out that the statistic about more women filing for …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:39 AM
12

This is something about TBP I don't get: do you really assess casual sexual partners, the same way you would judge a long term romantic partner? Most people I know would say these are not the same thing. I'm not sure that's a Madonna/Whore complex but an honest expression of what they're attratcted to. I don't think anyone is arguing that you should look for and expect the same things from a ONS that you would in a LTR. No one is saying that you should think about marriage with your ONS. What I …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/02/14 12:17 AM
3

And they're hot because of the effort. It takes time to workout, to maintain an attractive physique. It takes time to do your hair and make-up. Effort is attractive. What I'm saying is that hot people acknowledge this, and there's more to the mindset than simple shallowness (though it is still pretty shallow).
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/14 12:32 AM
3

Well, as I've said before, there is a lot of common sense stuff in TRP. I just think it's a shame that it gets mixed in with sexist worldviews and bitterness.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/14 12:22 AM
2

I didn't say that the connection is loving make-up, rather taking care of their appearance on comparable levels. There was a different thread in here the other day by a RPer asking "Why won't hot women fuck me?" and I was attempting to answer such a question. If a woman puts several hours worth of time into her appearance before going out, she's probably going home with a guy who did the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/02/14 12:21 AM
4

Well yeah, being born with stellar genetics is one thing. But surely we can agree that most people are not in that category. You can't realistically expect every beautiful woman you see to be a natural beauty and resent her when she isn't. Do you subscribe to the RP notion that sexual strategy is amoral? Do you think make-up counts as a sexual strategy? Do you think that if a woman is looking for a one-night-stand, wearing make-up is more or less dishonest than a man lying about money/notoriety/…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 11:59 PM
1

I've been in this thread too long. Are you agreeing with all that or are you just trying to explain the mindset?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 11:22 PM
5

Yes, are you anti-makeup then?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 11:17 PM
3

I can see both sides to the make-up argument. I'm bisexual, and I won't lie and say that I haven't been disappointed when a girl's boobs are smaller than her pushup bra led me to believe. How do you feel about the airbrushing/photoshopping of models? If we're talking about dishonesty and make-up, you can't really blame women for using tools to enhance their apperance when all of our mainstream advertising tells women they have to be perfect in a way that is not actually possible. As a feminist, …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 11:03 PM
3

I don't believe I took a stance as either pro- or anti-make-up, I was addressing what I perceive as a common question around these parts: Why won't hot women sleep with me? I posited that hot women (and I think we can agree this means the woman is wearing well-done make-up and hair if she's hot and out in public) are likely to be interested in men who put an equally visible effort into their apperance, and that if one is to be honest with themself, such a thing is obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 10:50 PM
1

Or they are gonna give sex to somebody who makes it seem like they are ambitious, successful, etc. Someone who makes them feel good about themselves? Yeah that's pretty normal. You whole original post could be summed up to: advertising doesn't work. Where did I claim advertising doesn't work?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 10:42 PM
7

It's make-up for a photoshoot, so that makes sense. You can't deny though that effective make-up takes skill. I'd bet money that most guys who think they like girls with "natural beauty" (naturally hot girls who don't need make-up) are actually talking about girls so good at make-up you don't know it's there.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 10:16 PM
2

Female models don't want male models as partners. The reality simply contradicts you. They go for very successful business man mostly, shady outlaw characters and so on. I never said female models want to date male models. I said female models aren't going to just give out sex because of how hot they are, and I suggested that they would want a partner that matched their ambitious lifestyle. Successful business men sounds about right. I did imply that non-professional good-looking people (hot non…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 10:08 PM
2

Throwing it away whole, it could just be discovered. Even completely destroyed, I can understand not wanting to let the physical copy of your gangbang tape out of your possession. It's illogical and isn't how I would handle the situation, but I can understand the fear. Being in a taped gang-bang at a young age is likely to affect the way you perceive sex, especially if you didn't like it as much as you thought it would. It's very possible she wasn't exactly traumatized by it, but it could also b…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 09:38 PM
7

This image was actually on the front page within the past few months. I don't know if you've seen a lot of make-up tutorials or know how much time it takes to do, but it is very much a hobby and a skill-based one that that. Hell, bone structure can be faked, it's called contouring.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 09:30 PM
12

What's it about then? How is sex with a professional any less genuine than gaming someone you don't know for a one night stand?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 09:16 PM
5

I remember that thread. I'd be interested to see an update on the situation. I don't believe (and I commented as much at the time) that the wife keeping the tape is proof of anything. Without hearing her reasoning for it (and her side of the story in general), I don't think there's anywhere near enough information to make a call on why did kept the tape. I suggested that out of fear, she might have been afraid to let it out of her hands, even destroyed. Obviously it must have been a terrible exp…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 09:14 PM
10

This ties into the honesty thing as well. When a guy pressures a girl into sex by telling her that "sex isn't a big deal, loosen up" or whatever, he's lying. He clearly does think sex is a big deal, both for his own desires, and the fact that it's likely he'll now think less of her (if some opinions expressed by TRP are to be believed) when he was the one who convinced her to have sex, and that it shouldn't be a big deal in the first place. By having oneself convinced that sex is a big deal can …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 09:04 PM
5

We seem to be on the same page with sex workers. Your reasons are fair enough to me for not wanting to hire one. I actually do wish that male escorts were more of a thing in America and I could probably write an essay on the subject but that would be getting way off topic. I do want to touch on the partner count thing again. I know there are statistics that can be read as making connections between promiscuity and divorce rate, but I think it's a little more complicated than what you're suggesti…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 08:37 PM
7

It's funny that you bring up virgins because female virgin you are told sex is "no big deal" by men. But apparently sex is a super big deal if they find out she wasn't a virgin.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 08:21 PM
4

What if she's been with three guys over the past five or six years? Neither a virgin nor into promiscuous territory. Someone reasonably picky about who they sleep with. Someone who wouldn't have had the sex had they not been deceived about whatever the lie was? Also, just because someone has slept with 50 people doesn't mean it's okay to lie to them for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 08:17 PM
5

Have you noticed this tendency beyond romantic relationships? Oh absolutely. Just look at any group of people large enough to break off into cliques. People with similar interests tend to group together.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 07:59 PM
21

So basically what you're saying is that it's okay for men to lie for but not women? For the record, I don't think anyone should lie, I might not have made that point clear. I'm not defending women who lie. I'm asking why male lying isn't seen as a big deal by TRP. If a woman enters a relationship with a man who intentionally deceives her into thinking he's wealthy, I hardly view that as a mere waste of time. What was lost on her part? How about the sense of financial security she's been lead to …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 06:53 PM
3

1) Because women are human beings who have the right not to sleep with someone they don't want to sleep with. There's nothing wrong with wanting to sleep with beautiful women. But you aren't owed that. No one is. break down for me WHY hot women won't just willingly sleep with men. Because sometimes hot women have other shit to do besides having sex with all the people who want to bang them. They're not a commodity. Women have hobbies. And thoughts. Sure, there's probably men out there who feel I…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/02/14 04:53 PM
1

I think it's too early to say if it's healthy or not, but I do think it's fascinating. I also wouldn't say that Japan's case is a break-down of gender roles, but rather a reaction to a very strict set of social rules that only very recently (in terms of history) have started to become impractical, but still, in a way, are being followed. From what I know, it's seen as socially taboo to just walk up to someone and express interest in them. You're supposed to take baby steps, very polite baby step…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/01/14 04:50 AM
5

The women are the same in Japan. I saw a short documentary recently talking about how women specifically are choosing to not to commit to a serious partner (let alone think about having children) because there are so many for-pay alternatives available. Not just sex, either. There's an entire industry of non-sexual escorts and for-pay companionship. The traditional gender roles in Japan are so rigid, it seems like most people would rather avoid the dating game altogether than try to balance a pr…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/14 11:48 PM
3

Do you really think couples should just keep having children if they haven't had a boy? Maybe she went through two pregnancies and decided that 1) she never wanted to put her body through it again 2) children are expensive and time consuming and two is enough. And I'm pretty sure that being the president is going to go down in history regardless of whether or not said president had a "male heir". America is not a monarchy, heirs don't matter in that sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/14 03:02 PM
1

Pretty widespread during the bursts of popularity. In the 70s and 80s it was very popular and sexy for male musicians to wear skin-tight, flamboyant, and/or feminine clothing. While it was never the sort of thing the average 30-40 year old would get swept up in, the teenagers who went to their shows and followed the trends definitely mimicked the trends.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/01/14 01:34 AM
3

I've also noticed the parallels. TRP does have discussions though. There's that whole little lexicon at the top of the screen showing how different types of posts are tagged. So while it is still pretty circle-jerky, there is a place for discussion. That is not so with SRS. However, there is SRSDiscussion, SRSMeta, ect.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 11:49 PM
7

Again, SRS never discusses anything. It's a circlejerk for people who already "get it", and asking what "it" is or trying to argue about it will get you banned.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 11:36 PM
1

If feminine guys could attract women at the same rate as masculine guys, you would start seeing far more feminine behavior in men. Multiple times through history, even multiple times in the past 50 years or so, just such a thing has been trendy, and feminine men have gone in and out of fashion.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 11:31 PM
4

SRS is not, nor has ever claimed to be a place for discussion. Also, I'm not quite seeing what TRP "gets" that SRS doesn't, what I'm mostly seeing as users calling people who comment in SRS racists, which is always a hot topic considering the two different ways those groups define racism.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 11:04 PM
9

I've dealt with a case or two like this, and it's a long, pain-in-the-ass process, but it's usually settled with a paternity test and lots of patience. If the man fights for it and gets a judge involved, I've seen them get the custody of their children under such circumstances. Again, it's a pain, but it's possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 01:59 PM
21

Personally, I think virgin shaming is shitty. It's not something that I do. There are plenty of people out there who lost their virginity "late", as well as asexual and/or celibate folks (voluntary or otherwise) who are whole human individuals with plenty to offer the world. Some of the virgin shaming out there is inexcusable. Hell, most of it is. The reason it is used as an insult, I think, is that they think it's hypocritical for someone with little to no experience in sexual interactions to s…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/01/14 06:35 AM
2

I will admit that deep down, everyone does want to sit on a couch all day and have someone bring them food and sex and otherwise leave them alone. As a woman, that doesn't sound unappealing to me either. But I think that would get old fast. And it isn't what I'd call a relationship. Like you said, it isn't practical. What is the other person getting out of this? Not much. If anything. I don't think men like a lot stuff in relationships, same with women. I'll agree to that. But compromise is part…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 01:54 AM
2

My ideal relationship would be one which I don't have to talk to my mate, and I can sit on the couch and do nothing and she brings me food, and fucks me at a moments notice, any time any place. I know that just isn't possible. Do you believe all men are this way?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 01:29 AM
7

If I were to ask you, if I took away your pussy, how would you be able to keep a man? I contemplated not answering this, because to me it is a ridiculous question. But for the sake of debate here's what I would say: I am not currently keeping my man with my pussy anyways, but I'd keep him around the same way I am now, out of mutual respect, shared interests, and the fact that we love each other. My fiance is my best friend. We have fun together, we have the same sense of humor, we feel strongly …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 01:25 AM
5

Isn't pussy a good thing? Language like this is the problem. Reducing women and relationships with them down into the concept of "pussy". That is offensive to some people. It's offensive to me. amplified pussy power I don't even know what that means. And this is also part of the problem. TRP's whole vocabulary, phrases like "the cock carosel" and "hamstering", they're all very inherently insulting towards women. i don't know why this is bad. TRP is a board that claims women are only good for sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 12:25 AM
6

When TRP says this us what they mean is women are more interested in how they feel than an unconditional agreement. Relationships aren't an unconditional agreement, not anymore anyways. Even marriages. It seems to me like part of what TRP is angry about is the fact that thanks to feminism, it is now less legal and less socially acceptable to force women to stay in relationships they don't want to be in. Cause it's humor that giving some stupid flower is going to light up my woman's heart, but it…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 12:19 AM
3

The comment you're responding to literally just broke down the current top post on TRP, spelling out the problems for you. You didn't address it at all. This part at the end sums it up for you: This is all happening on a board that teaches men how to get pussy from women. A conversation about why women suck for thinking men just want pussy. This is why people think poorly of you guys.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/01/14 12:02 AM
6

Well romance isn't real. This doesn't make sense to me. Isn't it a constant TRP topic, that women are allegedly unable to love men as deeply/unconditionally as men want to be loved? Wouldn't that make romance a RP/male notion? I'm pretty sure there are plenty of men who believe romance is real.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/01/14 11:51 PM
2

I don't know if it's fair to call all users of tumblr women who unironically label men as douchebags and rapists, but I'm sure there are extremists. fast edit: Okay I'm seeing what you're saying is to go there to look. Fair enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/01/14 04:08 AM
7

So it's a place for men to be emotional and illogical? edit: For the record, I would also call an all-woman space where they freely and unironically call all men douchebags and rapists to be illogical. Obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 07:05 PM
8

Anger is an emotion that has historically been associated with men, but has somehow been seen as exempt from the negative associations attached to more traditionally feminine emotions. I think men and women get just as emotional when they disagree with each other and are upset about something. According to the link you posted, there is scientific evidence that the logical part of the brain shuts off when someone gets emotional about something. I think men are more emotional than they're willing …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 07:00 PM
2

"Cunt" is the only one that I know in some countries, doesn't have the gendered weight that it does in America, and in that context, I wouldn't say it's any worse than asshole (which still isn't a nice thing to call someone but I'm guilty of it) "Slut" and "bitch" those are words that I see thrown around very casually in TRP, and falls under the category of awful things said about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:56 PM
7

Also, by awful, I mean things like saying women have no honor, saying that women are treacherous by nature, claiming that women have no value other than their looks and genitals, use of words like "slut", "bitch", "cunt", ect.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:39 PM
11

I don't understand how you can claim that women are more emotional than men, when TRP is, from what I've seen, a display of strong emotion from men. Lots of anger and passion.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:33 PM
11

So when these guys are saying awful things about women during this "grieving process", you're agreeing that it's illogical?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:28 PM
17

If someone is constantly upset/angry about women/not getting laid, do you think that counts as being emotional?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:21 PM
5

I'd also be curious to read the actual study, as I'd be interested to know if it's referring just to empathy (the ability to understand what someone else is going through) or all emotion, including anger. Anger is often very irrational, and I'd be interested to see what the brain looks like when someone is upset in that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 06:16 PM
1

When women do incredible things, it's often downplayed. Like recently when Heidi Klum rescued three people from drowning and all anyone talked about in the news was how her swimsuit shifted and exposed her breasts.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 05:42 PM
5

It's both sides, I get downvotes as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 04:58 PM
5

I don't know if you're trying to insult me or not, but I was pretty pleased with my life and by senior year I was dating/sexually active and have been since. Disease and baby free, too!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 04:51 PM
7

I don't really buy into the whole alpha/beta thing (other than for the sake of discussion in this subreddit), and I don't think the submissive/feminine men that I find attractive would even necessarily fit into the beta mold, nor are even mutually inclusive terms. Betas, as I understand, are pushovers, needy, and often unkempt with their appearance. Feminine men can be dominant, aggressive, cocky, sharply dressed. I'll reference the Ruby Rhod character from The Fifth Element (who is straight and…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 02:06 AM
4

Where do you buy such manga? The internet. That's where me and all my friends bought ours anyway. Or at conventions. But mostly the internet. And that's when it was purchased, lots if not most of the of images and stories out there are free.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 01:20 AM
9

Back when I was in high school, my friends and I passed around a binder full of printed-out yaoi fanfiction. We were all the quiet, nerdy girls who no one really paid attention to. No one had any idea we were reading hardcore pornography and basically getting off during class.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/01/14 12:16 AM
12

Submissive and/or feminine men are, in my opinion, incredibly hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/14 09:20 PM
9

My admittedly anecdotal experience says otherwise. Your anecdotal experience says that my personal experiences are incorrect? Are you saying I'm not attracted to submissive men? That's quite a statement. I can assure you that I am. For example, they like when I tell them where we are going to go on a date. This is a perfect example of what would be an immediate turn-off for me. Yes, I'm familiar with all the RP gaming tactics you just described. I think it's a disengenuous way to go about gettin…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/14 02:31 PM
13

I don't know if this has anything to do with PPD. That being said, what is your worldview and what are your values? Why do you consider sex with a sex worker unacceptable?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/14 03:48 AM
7

I've been attracted to dominant men, sure. I've also been attracted to submissive men and men who are a mix of the two. Mostly it's been a mix. Dominance can mean different things, and while I might be attracted to a man who is confident in some ways, I've never been attracted to pushyness or men who feel entitled to disregard my personal boundaries.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/01/14 03:31 AM
7

Just because it's more socially acceptable for women to like football and men to like fashion doesn't mean that marriages will become easier across the board. Do you realize that there have always been unhappy marriages since the dawn of time? We are simply living during a time when it is now more socially acceptable than ever to get a divorce and move on than ever before. In the past, people in unhappy marriages would just suck it up and deal, because it was overwhelmingly frowned upon by socie…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 09:11 PM
5

The whole "women don't like football" thing is mostly a sitcom stereotype, same as the "fat doofy husband who rolls his eyes at the thought of shopping". Most women I know like football, and at all the bars in my area, game day crowds are pretty evenly split between men and women. I myself like to watch football but I don't really have a favorite team. I played fantasy for a few years. If I weren't concerned about doxxing my friends, I'd screencap my current Facebook wall to give you an idea abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 08:58 PM
3

Also like I said, it's not just the flair, I've mentioned my gender more than once in my responses to you. I hope you're reading them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 01:55 AM
3

We're at an impasse here. I'm an abuse prevention specialist. I have read quite my fair share of sexual harassment cases. I think feminists are wasting time speaking out against cat calls. And that's your opinion. They should help women learn how to deal with cat calls. We do. And part of that is speaking up against it. Again, like I'm doing right now, as well as both of those organizations that I linked you. I'm sorry, but nothing you are saying is convincing me in the slightest that catcalling…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 01:53 AM
3

I'm not sure if you're calling me "sir" ironically, but I've mentioned several times during our conversation that I'm a woman, and my flair also states this. That's what I meant by women speaking up against sexual harassment. I am a woman, and I am speaking up against it, to you, someone who has repeatedly denied that catcalling is sexual harassment. Telling a woman she's beautiful isn't the same as street harassment. This site is very informative about street harassment. Here's another non-prof…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 01:25 AM
4

Free speech cause a problem with your logic. I don't think we're at the point we're willing to give up free speech for the comfort of women. Free speech doesn't cover sexual harassment, in the same way it doesn't cover any other form of threat. And we are absolutely at the point where we're willing to "give up free speech the comfort of women", that is why sexual harassment is illegal. It's obvious that you, personally, don't think it should be, but it is. Maybe you haven't witnessed cat calls. …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/01/14 12:27 AM
3

In our society, sexual harassment has been deemed illegal, in the same way we have decided that violence and libel (insulting someone isn't necessarily illegal, but libel is a specific type of insult and is) are against our laws. I asked the other two rhetorical question because they are similarly philosophical. Obviously you want more of an answer than "It just is" when you ask why sexual harassment is wrong. But it's a difficult question to answer, just as difficult as why violence is wrong. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 10:20 PM
1

Well, as a woman in the western world, I've never personally felt like a slut for having sex with someone I wanted to have sex with. My friends have never given me shit about it either, nor I them. Maybe in more conservative communities women are raised to be ashamed of having sex, but that wasn't my experience. I'm sure there are women out there who shame other women for having sex, but I'm not friends with them. And I don't care what strangers think. Why should I?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 09:55 PM
3

Why is sexual harassment wrong? I mean, why is violence wrong? Why is hurting or insulting someone wrong? Sexual harassment is a violation of another person. It's hostile. When you catcall a woman, you are bullying her, in a sexual manner. You are making her uncomfortable, on purpose. In many cases, it's illegal. Are these questions of yours genuine or philosophical? I've never encountered someone before who didn't know why sexual harassment was wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 09:38 PM
2

Here is the beginning of the Wikipedia page on psychological manipulation: Psychological manipulation is a type of social influence that aims to change the perception or behavior of others through underhanded, deceptive, or even abusive tactics.[1] By advancing the interests of the manipulator, often at another's expense, such methods could be considered exploitative, abusive, devious, and deceptive. Social influence is not necessarily negative. For example, doctors can try to persuade patients …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 09:23 PM
2

I have to get ready for work, but I'll come back and answer this later today. Asking why being manipulative is bad is delving into good vs evil territory and it's going to be a long answer.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 02:59 PM
3

Because it's sexual harassment.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 02:56 PM
2

I think it's fine so long as you acknowledge the possibility that some women out there will take the suggestion at face value. She might not have sex with you after all, if you only invited her over to look at your Hawaii pictures, recognize there is a possibility she will look at your pictures and then leave, and that she's done nothing wrong for it. Also recognize that it can make you appear manipulative. You invite her home for some other reason than sex, then start making sexual advances, sh…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 02:23 PM
2

Well, it's rude as hell, for starters. It's rude to yell anything out a car window at a stranger. It's definitely rude to send a picture of your penis to someone via text unless it's specifically requested. Do you really only view things like as a means to sex that you yourself wouldn't use? Do you actually not understand why those things are socially inappropriate outside of the realm of getting laid?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/01/14 02:02 PM
6

Oh boy, we're about to have a DS9-flavored argument. This should be good. Jadzia Dax is arguably beyond gender, what with being both Jadzia and Dax simultaneously, as well as all the previous hosts of the Dax symbiont. I always understood her attraction to Worf (and his attraction to her) to be deeply rooted in her memories of living as a Klingon. To me, she is one of the most fascinating characters in the Star Trek universe. I also don't know if it's fair to call Worf an alpha-male. Maybe in co…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 10:33 PM
7

I don't know all the facts about the situation, but my gut reaction is yes, that was wrong. People know when they gain weight, they are quite aware, and it hurts to have it pointed out, especially by someone they arguably trust to be on their side. It's one thing if your spouse says "I want to lose weight" and you say "That's great I support you" than to just point out weight gain unprompted. I believe my question is relevant because the comments you make about LTRs and the standards to which yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 10:17 PM
9

The BP circlejerk began when TRP linked a RoK articled called "Girls With Short Hair Are Damaged", with quite a bit of agreement in the comments. TBP wouldn't be talking about it in the first place without such an audacious claim from TRP.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 10:07 PM
7

I would expect the weight to be lost within a reasonable time frame Feel free not to answer, as this is a personal question, but have you ever been in a serious, long-term relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 10:04 PM
3

I've never understood that sort of stubborn pride.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 07:32 PM
2

I have jokingly told my fiance that he's not "allowed" to cut his hair, but we both know that all that really means is that I think he looks hottest with long hair. If I were to come home to a short, stylish haircut, I certainly wouldn't be upset. Surprised, yeah, but nothing worth ending a relationship or harboring resentment over. Who knows, it might even look a lot better than I assume it would. Also, I completely agree with your Christopher Lambert statement!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 06:50 PM
2

I actually would like to see a return of chivalry in the traditional sense, but it has nothing to do with gender roles or TRP. Historical chivalry, up until the past few hundred years, was always about a behavioral code of honor for the military and war tactics, and I wouldn't mind seeing it become trendy to be a good, decent, non-corrupt person in the armed forces and in law enforcement. But that has nothing to do with what you're asking. As for what I guess I would call chivalric romance, espe…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 06:09 PM
5

I'm no expert on the historical relevance of chivalry, but my understanding of chivalry in the knight/lady sense of things matches up with how you describe tolerating modern acts of chivalry. It's not that the man is opening a door or pulling out a chair because the woman is incapable of doing so herself and the man expects her to be weak, it is because the lady is allowing him to dote on her, because she knows it will make him happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 05:18 PM
25

I'd be very curious to know if there has ever been a woman out there who "trapped" a man with marriage/pregnancy only so she could cut her hair, knowing he would hate it. It seems like a very elaborate way to annoy someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 03:31 PM
2

Oh yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 01:51 PM
4

It's fascinating to me, that's for sure. I grew up in a relatively progressive house and went to a very liberal college. And it really is a perfect example of male privilege, though I'm sure it doesn't seem that way from their point of view (does privilege ever though?) that women should look a certain way for any given man.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 01:50 PM
5

Throughout this discussion, the safety issue kept nagging at the back of my mind and I'm glad that someone has brought it up. Long hair is definitely a liability in any given number of situations. I do wonder, as you suggest, how much of the aversion to long hair is due to a subconscious resentment on the part of some men to that loss of vulnerability.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 01:37 PM
6

While I don't have 50 men at my immediate disposal, I brought this topic up in the first place because if I've been in a room with over a dozen people (co-ed group, more guys though) for the past few hours at a casual gathering, and I asked the men in the room if they felt any given woman looked better with short hair than long. Two said they prefer long, the other seven said it varies from woman to woman. When I asked if they thought short hair on a woman was some sort of act of defiance or dis…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 07:14 AM
3

From the opposing viewpoint, I would definately want to know early in a relationship if the man I was involved with considered short hair a deal-breaker. To me, that is a deal-breaker. If you were in a relationship and did shave your head bald, would you consider it reasonable if your SO held it against you?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 06:37 AM
2

I kind of agree with this, but there's no scientific backing. Why do you agree with it? Why does a woman's personal preference for her hair style signify a message towards all men?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 06:24 AM
11

An evolutionary psychology explanation for this is that malnutrition and deficiencies in minerals and vitamins causes loss of hair or hair changes. Emphasis mine. There are two evo-psych citations for an explanation to the suggestion that men across the board prefer long hair. It also says that Asian men prefer dark hair (which is what's the social norm). For a very long time, long hair with women was a social norm. Evo-psych also posits that men are attracted to ample breasts and hips but there…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 06:21 AM
11

I actually do prefer men with long hair. However, I don't feel a subtle sense of anger every time I see a short-haired man, as though he's doing it to annoy me, personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 05:55 AM
7

The tattoo I wanted (and got) is small and between my shoulder-blades, low enough that most shirts cover it. Completely irrelevant to job prospects. The optional adornment I was mostly referring to was his aversion to jewelrey. He would make comments about how he didn't like things like even small, modest necklaces or bracelets. It wasn't the reason we broke up, but I always thought it was strange and a little unreasonable. He never gave me a solid reason why he didn't like it either, and believ…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 05:36 AM
4

That's understandable. I would love to have bright blue hair and get Jadzia Dax tattoos but I'm also a professional and I understand what a bad move career wise those things can be. Wrists tattoos are arguably a sign of poor decision making depending on your carreer path.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 04:26 AM
2

I can understand being attracted to the amount of effort someone puts into an appearance trait, similar to how some people prefer a muscular, gym-style body. Is short hair enough of a deal-breaker that you would bring up your opinion ahead of any potential hair-cuts, for example early in the relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 04:16 AM
13

I was in a relationship with a guy several years ago who was very displeased that I got a tattoo. I told him well in advance that I wanted one, and he would just roll his eyes and say that it was a dumb idea. I got it anyway and later expanded to make it bigger. He also didn't like it when I wore jewlelry of any kind. My hair was long the entire time we were together, so that subject never came up. I'm not exactly pro-jewlery, but having such a strong insistance about optional adornments was ver…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 04:06 AM
5

Without the ability to make a boner, I am weak, impotent, and harmless. As opposed to being strong, potent and harmful? Strong and potent and I can get behind, but there's something kind of messed up about equating a lack of erection with harmlessness. I get what he's trying to say, but he choose those words very poorly in my opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/14 03:26 AM
7

Of course there is a place for you in the world, and nothing you said in your post sounds like you're doomed to end up alone. I do want to say though, and someone else already mentioned this, but I want to chime in and agree that feminism can't really be blamed for the modern, dual-income household. We are living in a crappy economy, and I have a feeling there would be way more stay-at-home wives (and husbands!) if it were financially possible. Feminism hasn't kept wages low for middle and lower…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/14 01:17 AM
4

Absolutely. The "Overly Attached Girlfriend" meme comes to mind. Both genders can be guilty of pedestalization and the behavior it encourages.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/01/14 12:24 AM
10

Currently engaged.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/01/14 03:18 AM
2

Wow. I hadn't read either of those threads before, they're both messy and complicated. Short answer, yes, it is okay to feel upset if your SO treats you differently than a previous partner. It's okay to feel upset about anything. What matters is what you do about it. Long answer: In the first link, I didn't care for the tone of the male OP. The fact that he tried to leave while she was crying and they hadn't even talked about it yet bothered me. The whole part with him calling her a whore was a …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/14 10:21 PM
10

I see what you're trying to say, and I'm not trying to be argumentative, but here are my thoughts: First I just want to say, that as an adult woman, I have never actively sought out a partner who reminded me of my dad. I've never compared my dad to potential partners, other than over casual things like "Oh you like Star Wars, my dad likes Star Wars, you'd probably get along". I've never had a desire to recreate the father/daughter relationship with a sexual partner. Because that would be weird, …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/01/14 02:28 PM
1

I'm so stoked that there are RvB (and/or RT) fans in this sub <3
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/14 05:00 AM
1

SUCK IT, REDS
/r/PurplePillDebate04/01/14 03:36 AM
2

GO BLUE TEAM
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/14 11:27 PM
3

I got all excited for a moment and thought this was going to be about Red vs. Blue. If we're doing that, I wanna be Church.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/14 11:26 PM
6

literally nobody has ever told you that Are you suggesting that no one in polyhooly's life has ever encouraged them to fit into a traditional gender role? I'm pretty sure everyone has that pushed on them at some point or another in their life, even if it's through playful teasing. "Man up", "that's not very ladylike" and such.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/14 12:22 AM
11

I'll agree that having someone chastise you for choosing to be a stay-at-home mom is a negative effect of feminism. However, I'd argue that there are just as many if not more women out there who get criticized for not wanting to be a stay-at-home mom, in fact, you're kind of doing that right now. While not criticizing me personally, I do happen to be a woman with no children who has no intention of having children, and you're saying that I'm selfish and that my life isn't being lived correctly. …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/14 12:09 AM
11

I make a point to follow feminist blogs on tumblr, because I like to keep my finger on the pulse of the discussion. There are loads of posts on tumblr decrying to stereotype of the "tumblr feminist". The majority of users on tumblr, even those who identify as feminist, shun the "tumblr feminists", from what I've seen. The most misinformed and loud are all also very, very young, I'm talking 13-18. Most of the users on the site don't take them seriously. Something else to keep in mind about tumblr…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/14 11:32 PM
4

I'm not sure if you're seeking advice, so feel free to disregard this if you're not, but I don't think you should expect to lose your daughter if you get divorced. I've seen many divorced men get full custody of their children, and one of them is my brother-in-law. If your wife is as angry and unreasonable as you're describing, I can only speculate that your daughter might have a happier childhood with just you. The more you can document the better, especially if you really do see things ending …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/14 10:54 PM
12

While it is an interesting read, the article points out multiple times that the on-going conversation on the subject is complicated with lots of exceptions to the perceived norm. Like this: Whenever you talk about such gender differences in behavior, your are referring to two different Bell Curves, one for men and one for women, that largely overlap. What this means is that any given man might be as good or better as any woman at empathy, and a woman as good as or better than a specific man at h…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/14 10:25 PM
1

Thank you, I was just trying to put myself in her shoes, because when I initially read the thread, I couldn't believe how someone could maintain that kind of double life for eight years. I'd even hazard a guess that after the first abortion and a few years went by without further incident, she might have thought it was a fluke. Then by the third time, she broke down and told him. It looks like he's choosing to get counseling with her, I wish them the best.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/01/14 12:33 AM
4

I'm reading the original thread a little late, so I don't know what the top comments originally were, but I'm not seeing anything overly harsh towards the OP. One thing really stuck out to me though, and it's not being heavily discussed, but to me it explains the wife's motive: After they were told by a doctor that she was infertile, they ceased their use of all the contraception they'd been using before. He said that she was on the pill and they'd been using condoms and he was considering getti…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/01/14 06:09 PM
4

My parents are still together. My dad was a medic in the Navy, now retired but still working a civilian job on base. My mother is a social worker, I've followed in her footsteps. Both my parents worked my whole childhood, and they made about the same amount of money. My dad probably makes a little more and gets better benefits, but they both had to work to support the family. I'm the oldest of three children, one younger sister and one younger brother. All three of us played with whatever toys w…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/12/13 01:53 PM
6

To me it reeks of vigilantism, which I'm not a fan of. I think that if you suspect someone of trying to harm you (and you're not in immediate danger of dying as a result), you should calmly document everything and hand it over to the authorities.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 03:15 AM
6

If my mother died tomorrow, I think it would be pretty poor fucking form for my fiance to initiate sex if I were distraught about the death and made it obvious I wasn't feeling sexual. I'm not even sure how not having sex would help you grieve anyway. If you like sex so much, I'd think you would want to do things you enjoyed even more in order to grieve. IDK. Seriously? Maybe we have difference in life experiences, but I've done my fair share of grieving, and my partners have always respected my…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 03:03 AM
6

Maybe that's just the kind of person I am, but even if someone is trying to wrong me, I don't actively try to ensure they will suffer physically as a consequence. There are lots of other ways a guy could prevent spremjacking if he really felt he was in danger of it. Plus, from a legal standpoint, it's foolish. If he were to try and bring a case against her, the whole genital multilation thing would really muddle up the situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 02:51 AM
9

In my view it's only manipulation only 1 person wins. You think it's manipulative for someone to want time to grieve without having sex during the mourning process? Relationships aren't about "winning". I think it's completely reasonable for someone to put a hold on sex while they're grieving and that it would be pretty selfish for the other partner to demand sex anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 02:35 AM
8

Yes. Because I'm a woman with a high sex drive and I know lots of other women who are the same way. I was raised by parents who never pushed traditional gender roles on me, and by the time I was a teenager I had formed a social circle of female friends with similar world views. And we're all feminists, too! I'm also an author or erotic fiction written for a primarily female, and very enthusiastic audience. I wholeheartedly believe that women are just as sexual as men, but are often discouraged f…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 01:31 AM
12

"Pussy power" only exists if you believe it does. If you've got yourself convinced that getting your dick in a vagina is your primary goal, obviously you're going to start regarding women who don't immediately put out as "guarding" their vaginas. When really they're just exercising bodily autonomy. If this is a ONS situation, just move on. Why would you be pursuing sex with someone playing mindgames? If this is a LTR, it's obviously more complicated and probably time to have a talk with your par…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/12/13 01:01 AM
4

Are you advocating it though? Do you think putting hot sauce in used condoms is something that should be done? (From where I'm standing the entire scenario sounds like an urban legend and I'm pretty sure the scent of hot sauce would be noticeable even in such a hypothetical situation.)
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/13 03:46 PM
11

I don't think it's fair to say that the average woman pushes for condom-less sex with malicious intentions. Never once has another woman encouraged me to do so, nor have a I heard another woman talk about doing it. Most women I know are terrified of getting pregnant. What do you mean by 'it's a risk/reward thing'?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/13 03:28 PM
9

Here's one, this one came up today, here's another one. It doesn't get mentioned every day, but it comes up often enough, both in TRP and elsewhere on Reddit. definitely deserves her vagina burned by hot sauce with no mercy lol Well I guess that answers my question.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/13 02:03 AM
7

I know those girls are out there, the same way there are guys out there who hate condoms and swear they'll pull out in time. My advice is not to sleep with skeezy people, i.e. people who push sex without a condom for any reason that makes you uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/12/13 01:53 AM
4

Neither of us knows the context of his father beating his mother, only this bit: and even beat my mom when she got out of line. "Out of line" could mean that she was physically attacking him and he was defending himself, but the OP cites this part of his childhood as a time when his father embodied the "alpha male" persona. Honestly, even if he was defending himself, "beating" is a pretty harsh word to assign to the act, and leads me to believe it wasn't self-defense, given the context in OP's p…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/12/13 01:38 AM
5

Wow. This post, to me, is why I don't care for TRP's attitude towards women. I think the most useful advice in that thread is about the same that I would give, which would be to apologize to his father and try to mend their relationship. That has nothing to do with dating advice. And no one over there that I saw touched on this part: I'll brutishly fuck the shit out of your kind and toss you out like the garbage you are once i've had my way with you. Yeah, I know, it's all part of the "therapy" …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/13 10:40 PM
6

If the beating wasn't justified, then he can rightfully be labelled a wife-beater I'm pretty sure you're a wife-beater if you beat your wife, regardless of whether or not you feel it's "justified".
/r/PurplePillDebate26/12/13 10:20 PM
5

This is getting way off topic. This is why I said you'd, (and I can't believe this has to be clarified) hypothetically, never make it into my door. It does't need to be clarified that the situation is hypothetical, this is a debate sub and I'm not sure why you brought up you and I in a hypothetical sexual situation to begin with, referring to me multiple times in terms of whether or not I'd "make it through your door" and that if I'm sexy enough for you "has yet to be determined". None of that h…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/13 03:16 PM
4

See, you just said it twice in a row you're trying to shoehorn in the ability to stop sex during, and that's where I have to put my foot down. So you don't believe that someone should have the right to end sex if they want to? I'm not trying to "shoehorn" anything, I feel that bodily autonomy is a human right and I'm asking if you agree, and it looks like you don't. I'm not saying you're a bitch, I'm just saying we'd be at an impasse right now. This is exactly the kind of talk that would get you…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/13 02:55 AM
4

Well, your morality seems to be in the right place, as you don't engage with women you aren't sure want to have sex with you. It sounds like you're not dealing LMR at all if you're establishing intent ahead of time. But I still believe that a woman has the right to stop or deny sex at any time, no matter how heavily she's been flirting or how forward you've been with your intentions. Any time she tries to claim control over the sex By "having control over sex", do you mean the ability to say no …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/12/13 12:43 AM
6

So do you believe that if she says yes to sex after she's already at your place she shouldn't be allowed to change her mind? I mean, it's clearly a frustrating thing to experience and is arguably flaky on her part, but shouldn't she still be allowed to change her mind? Also, do you believe all LMR is a result of societal pressure and should be dealt with accordingly?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 11:29 PM
5

I would like to chime in with anecdotal contribution: I worked in a high volume bar in a college town for several years, and I never once saw a woman slap or hit a male patron and get away with it. In fact, the two times I did see a woman slap a man, they (the two different women on two different nights) were promptly thrown out by security. People in the bar industry don't want anyone getting violent in their establishment, regardless of gender stereotypes.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 09:50 PM
9

I've only been in one relationship with someone who acted childish to a fault, and I broke up with him, which I guess was ultimately how I dealt with it. For example, one time he threw something across the room in anger because he was mad at a video game, and it landed about a foot away from my dog. I don't think he was trying to hit the dog, it was just the fact that he clearly didn't care if he did. I didn't say anything at all, I just scooped up my startled dog and took her back to the bedroo…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 05:00 PM
7

Your thoughts are very refreshing to see, thank you. I especially like this part: be an awesome enough man that the next morning she regrets resisting
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 04:37 PM
2

I don't know if that's the universal TRP definition of it, but it's one I've seen mentioned here a few times, and in my opinion, it's the least "rapey" way to define it and the best way to sell it as a legitimate idea. I don't personally buy that explanation, as it seems highly unlikely that if a woman seems nervous or hesitant about sex, then the explanation must be "societal pressure". It sounds like a delusion to me, to convince oneself that "pushing through LMR" is appropriate behavior.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 04:23 PM
3

I also noticed that! We should start a sitcom.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 01:03 AM
10

It sort of feels like they are. If they're encouraging their intended hook-up to hook up, then regards her as a slutty one night stand, I think that's a little disingenuous, especially if she was exhibiting LMR.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 12:59 AM
12

I know questions of this nature have come up before and the answer is usually "We don't hate sluts, we love sluts! Just don't wanna marry them!" but I want to dig deeper than that. I did address that in my post, and like I said, am looking to dig deeper into the reasoning. I'm mostly looking to delve into the mindset of convincing a modest/hesitant woman into having casual sex, whilst simultaneously shaming women who have casual sex with other men. Who were possibly also cajoled into said casual…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 12:52 AM
9

I don't understand the analogy.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/12/13 12:19 AM
17

It is very likely all it takes for a woman to get laid with somebody. I'm going to latch onto this, because I see it come up again and again on the internet. Yes, arguably any woman can get laid if she has no standards at all. But you know what? So can men. And if men were to stop and think about the kind of bottom-of-the-barrel partners they could technically probably hook up with no problem, they might understand why women aren't as keen to use their Powers of Getting Laid as men would think t…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 10:15 PM
6

That just sounds so overdramatic to me. Plus, you can still feel protectiveness for someone and fall in love with someone without either putting them on a pedestal or deriding and dehumanizing them. That's the goal, actually, in my opinion. A life partner is someone who is going to see you at your worst, at your laziest, at your most vulnerable at some point or another, and if you can't be honest and yourself with them, what's the point? If you have to maintain some kind of frame and alterego to…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 09:59 PM
9

Why? Why is hard not to put women down just because they're no longer on a pedestal?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 09:43 PM
3

So if compromise is encouraged and major decisions seem to hang on financial reasoning and not traditional gender roles, I guess I don't really get the point of labeling the relationship as Captain/First Mate other than for the sake of the man feeling superior. But if the hypothetical woman is into it, hey whatever works.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 09:30 PM
8

So you're saying that if two people in a couple straight up disagree about something, it's healthy for the relationship to have one of them assert they're right no matter what, just because they're the man? I'm also having difficulty relating this sort of advice to actual long term relationships. The whole "I have the final say" scenario makes it sound like there's enough conflict in the relationship to warrant such a dynamic, and it sounds unhealthy. Or maybe you're referring to little, every d…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 04:05 PM
12

I've read that article before, my beliefs stand. Very little of my real world experience aligns with what manosphere blogs like that espouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 06:10 AM
21

I believe that people are people, and that there is no trick to understanding either men or women. I believe that if you have a series of failed relationships, there's usually only one common denominator. I don't think it's smart to pick partners based on appearance alone. I don't think mindgames are ever a good idea. I don't think sexual past should have an impact on current trust levels, meaning that I don't think promiscuity in the past guarantees infidelity in the future. I also don't think …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/12/13 05:45 AM
8

Medicare naysayers have been saying that for at least 20 years. I agree with you that medicare and other social safety nets are in need of reform, but I strongly disagree that women are obligated to have children in order to earn their use of medicare. Do you feel that men who choose not to have children should also be shamed?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/12/13 03:11 AM
13

Everyone pays into social security and medicare throughout their lives. They've earned it, whether they decide to have children or not. By "people such as yourself" having children, do you mean "everyone"? Are you suggesting that everyone has a social obligation to have children?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/13 02:31 PM
5

This is the second statistic I've seen you casually throw around in this thread, are you being serious? Because there's no way that's true.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/13 02:25 PM
2

Source?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/13 02:12 PM
2

Income inequality in general. The shrinking middle class. There was an article on the front page about inflation recently, and it showed that minimum wage in the 60s was closer to a living wage than minimum wage in modern society. It's getting harder for a man to be the sole breadwinner of a household on the money he's earned alone, and many married women and mothers have to work to support their families. I'm a social worker and I deal primarily with families below the poverty line, most of the…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/12/13 02:05 PM
4

Ah, good ol' VigilantCitizen. Any time MTV does an awards show I always have to go check it out to read about how it was all a demonic ritual to the Illuminati. Good times.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/13 11:50 PM
5

"Benevolent dictatorship" doesn't sound appealing at all. I'd much rather go to work and earn a living than rely on a man to provide for me unconditionally, especially one who considers himself a "benevolent dictator".
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/13 11:46 PM
8

I'm not sure why you're concluding that feminism has failed because of this study you've linked, or that women are less happy in current days because of feminism. If anything, I would say that women's overall unhappiness has to do more with income inequality (not vs men, but just income inequality in general). I understand your empathy towards the plight of the mother who has to drop her child off at a day-care so that she can work her shift, but I don't see how feminism is the culprit for her s…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/12/13 11:28 PM
5

Problematic is a word often used in debate and discussion as a way for one person to let the other person know that their behavior could have some sort of problem without escalating the observation to an insult. It's a useful way to help someone understand people's negative reaction to their behavior. Why should you care about what feminists or anyone else find problematic? Well I suppose it depends. It depends on the validity of the claim (that something is, in fact problematic) and also on you…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/12/13 12:15 AM
1

To the casual Redditor, I probably qualify as a SJW, but otherkin and headmates are where I draw the line. And I guess that's part of why I dislike TiA to an extent (on the days where I'm not laughing at it), because it gives irrationality a platform and gives those irrational people even more of a persecution complex.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/13 09:02 PM
7

I've been on TiA a few times, and I like the funny posts like sugarcrush listed. What I don't like about TiA is that it gives some Reddit users an impression that all of tumblr is an irrational cesspool of misinformation and overreaction, and that all feminists believe the extreme and usually uneducated opinions of the loudest "tumblr feminists". I've had a tumblr account for several years now with about 7,000 people who follow me, and not one of the blogs I mutually follow is an off-the-wall ra…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/12/13 05:09 PM
6

I really hope you get a reply to this, I honestly really want to read one.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/12/13 10:59 PM
5

I think it's wrong to maintain any sort of lie in a relationship. I think if having a high/low partner count is important, it should be brought up early in the relationship. I also think men and women should be open minded about sexual history. Personally, I don't think that a person having a high partner count says anything more about that person than having a high partner count. I don't think it makes them more likely to cheat or that they're bad partner material. My fiance is a musician and t…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/12/13 08:20 PM
16

I don't see a problem at all with your desire, so long as it is her desire as well. I know several couples who have very happy relationships following traditional gender roles, but in each couple both partners are very enthusiastic about the situation, and that's important. If you start dating a woman who makes it clear that life isn't for her, it should be a deal breaker, as in, don't pursue her or lead her on if you know you're incompatible in that way. Don't expect her to change and then rese…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/11/13 06:04 PM
2

You didn't really address my comment at all in your response, you just went off about why you wouldn't date a prostitute. If you're interested in serious debate, please answer my question: Why is it okay for you to sleep around, but not for women? To be honest, your own attitude, as a promiscuous man that you're self-describing as, sounds exactly like what you're turned off by in promiscuous women. The language you use like "sloot detected" and "pump and dump" completely negates your self-descri…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/13 06:42 PM
1

IE she lied Not necessarily. If she'd been asked specifically and lied and then maintained a lie over them, then yes, that's shitty. But that's not what I said in my comment that you're replying to. I said that he wasn't aware of her history in this hypothetical scenario, not that she lied. Don't assume that a miscommunication is a result of deliberate ill-intent. I've been in three long term relationships, and not once was I asked by my exes (or current fiance, in fact, I first bridged the subj…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/13 05:05 AM
1

I'd say the evidence lies with every man who has ever found out late in a relationship that his partner had been promiscuous before their relationship began. His assumption that the things he admires in her that he thought were hand-in-hand with a low partner count (being kind, feminine, loyal, whatever) are then dashed, and should confirm that any woman, regardless of partner count, is a capable of them. To me, it seems like the problem lies more with insecure men and their unwillingness to giv…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/11/13 04:23 AM
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