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Ben_KickassAcademy Archive

View 11 posts and 111 comments by Ben_KickassAcademy on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

The most interesting part to me is that your nonverbals don't just dictate how others think of you and view you, they dictate how you think of and view yourself
/r/seduction05/08/13 05:15 AM
2

Keep it simple. If you overload him, you'll make him feel overwhelmed. 1.) Get him basic information on health/fitness and fashion. My personal diet is more complicated than the one I give my clients, because you don't want them spending too much time thinking about it. Clear simple rules are best (to avoid ego depletion) 2.) Give him a basic framework to work with, something like the standard Approach, Transition, Attract, Quality, Comfort, Seduction. This is super helpful for new guys, because…
/r/seduction04/08/13 04:28 PM
1

This is a big one. You can say you want something casual all you want, if your actions aren't congruent with your words, you're sunk. I used to have this issue, because I was in a 4 year monogomous relationship at one time so I had boyfriend tendencies and habits.
/r/seduction04/08/13 04:07 PM
0

These are my "Must Read Self-Improvement Books" that I have recommended to anyone who asks. All have changed my life.
/r/seduction04/08/13 04:01 PM
2

I agree hotpajames. It's funny, I started writing on the same topic yesterday with similar conclusions: 99% of the time, "introvert" is just a description of someone who hasn't learned how to make socializing fun. Obviously someone like that will find the whole process draining.
/r/seduction13/07/13 02:51 PM
2

I can only speak for myself and some close friends, but for us it was a revelation. I had been having (below) average sex. Not because I was terrible for some strange reason. But because I'd never learned how. I was as good at sex as I was at ping pong or cooking or anything else I had done a bunch of times without really focusing on improving. Which is to say, not good. SGM was the first time I learned what may be intuitive to some guys. That what makes sex good for a girl isn't technical measu…
/r/seduction13/07/13 02:48 PM
13

This is why I write. Glad that it was able to help
/r/seduction13/07/13 12:18 AM
1

Good intuition, you are correct. One of the guys I've worked with through Kickass Academy wrote me an email talking about how he loves all of this self improvement stuff, but feels like he has to hide it because so many people in his life have negative reactions to it. It got me fired up because I really think learning to be a better man should be universally accepted and applauded, and it pisses me off that it's demonized and discouraged. He's heading in the right direction and I don't want to …
/r/seduction05/07/13 01:33 AM
1

I definitely get the sentiment of wanting to avoid the hassle, because some people will give you grief. I'll say it is tough to know or accurately predict who is going to give you grief about it, and who's going to be really into it and supportive about it. What you lose by not sharing this part of your life is the potential to meet people outside of the community who think what you're doing is awesome. Some of the coolest people I've met in my own life at least have come from being open about t…
/r/seduction05/07/13 01:01 AM
2

While this may feel safe and minimize your risk of haters, there is real potential downside to this strategy. Charlie is a friend of mine from long before we got interested in self improvement. I never masked my interest in this, we started going out together, and I would say he's the #1 reason I've improved my interpersonal skills so much and I don't know that there would be a Kickass Academy if I had hid this part of my life from him and my other friends. We can disagree here, but my personal …
/r/seduction04/07/13 08:36 PM
6

Having real standards is one of the most important parts of being an attractive man. You need standards, both physical and non-physical. Having standards is one of the most important parts of getting girls if you want to consistently get really good results. I do think that for some guys saying "she's not hot enough" is just an excuse to not talk to a girl and is actually fear cleverly disguising itself as reason. That being said, it IS okay to have standards. You don't have to hook up with ever…
/r/seduction04/07/13 02:30 PM
1

Well done, awesome that you had the balls to do it. Even more awesome that you've got the right learner's mindset! Take the rejections in stride, success will come. Welcome to the team :-)
/r/seduction04/07/13 02:18 PM
4

Disagree with Captain-Magic, you were totally fine with all the escalation pre-kiss. Also, totally fine going back to her place. You call it out yourself, but THE mistake that you made that actually hurt you was not varying the tempo post-kiss. After you've kissed her, you should be doing two things: breaking things off first before she does, which keeps things interesting, AND pushing things further. SO, ideally you'd kiss her, start talking dirty to her and escalating your touch, and then brea…
/r/seduction05/06/13 05:41 PM
1

First, to answer your question: photographer, videographer, yoga instructor, club promoter, things like that. When done right, these guys absolutely kill it. You're in a position of authority and literally surrounded by beautiful women. Second, it's more important that you have a job you find fulfilling and that you enjoy. Doing something that you can passionately speak to, that you truly enjoy, that's way more attractive than being a mediocre photographer who doesn't actually like his job. Find…
/r/seduction05/06/13 05:12 PM
1

Both are bad looking dudes, but both have great style that makes them APPEAR good looking. Looks for a guy are far more than genetics. Some of our clients have come in really hurting in the looks department, but after a change in diet and an exercise routine, they lose the fat. Then their facial structure becomes more angular and thus more attractive. Elevator boots for the short guys so everyone's at least 5'8", a new outfit, and bam, you've got an okay looking dude. That's all you need, the re…
/r/seduction16/05/13 08:30 PM
4

I think it's funny that your example of a guy with messed up "inner game" doesn't describe his mindset at all, only what he's wearing i.e. the most shallow part of "outer game". Step one for that guy would be change his outfit, get him in shape, and give him his first five minutes of conversational guidelines. More broadly, inner game and outer game grow together. It's almost impossible to get one through the roof if the other is lying on the floor. Good reference experiences grow inner confiden…
/r/seduction16/05/13 08:27 PM
1

DIRTY TALK - discovering how to do this right was life changing for me
/r/seduction06/05/13 01:07 AM
1

Pay. If you can't afford it, go somewhere you can afford. You don't offer to buy her a drink in the first 5 minutes for totally different reasons that are not applicable hear. Pay for dinner. Also, ditto ScienceofSilence, I generally tell people to avoid dinner dates if at all possible. You want to be doing something that allows you to be touchy when you want to be, and doesn't have a table separating you. If you have to go to dinner and sit down, sit perpendicular on the same corner if you can,…
/r/seduction25/04/13 04:09 AM
3

Bingo. The car is your friend. Start making out, let your hands wander, get her super turned on, eventually you'll end up fingering her. Dirty talk. Get her to the point where she really really wants to have sex with you, then go to the back seat.
/r/seduction25/04/13 03:27 AM
2

Step 1: Figure out what you want from this, what are you willing to do and what aren't you willing to do. I.e., would you be willing to date her exclusively, would you be willing to see her 5 times before having sex, would you want to just be friends or is that a non-starter for you. Get a clear sense of what outcomes you're cool with and what you aren't. Then, pick your ideal. Step 2: Meet up with her again. Communicate in person, where you can be charming, use humor, tease, calibrate, touch, e…
/r/seduction25/04/13 03:22 AM
1

Hey man, it sounds like you have the right mindset. It's true, if this is a priority for you, you should be going out at least a few times a week, even if nothing is going on you can always go to the bar alone or with one friend, or walk around during the day and "day game". Smart practice is the best way to get good fast. Most guys find all sorts of excuses not to do it, mostly that they're "tired" or "don't feel like it". That being said, as long as you're pushing yourself to go out a few time…
/r/seduction23/04/13 04:09 AM
10

Good post, this is actually a pretty deep question. Without knowing more about your story, it's hard to know for sure, but based on other guys I've seen it's probably one of these two things (or a combo): a lack of being okay with yourself and a desire for assurance that you are loved / have connections with people. Your language choice hints at the first one, because you think that you are "a loser for staying home". I stayed in last night, on a Saturday of all things. At no point did that make…
/r/seduction22/04/13 04:07 AM
1

I moved from MM to Love Systems pretty quickly, LS is basically the same as MM but like 2.0. After that I befriended a few different "naturals" and started going out with them a lot, and now I do my own style with the Kickass Academy. Another school of thought that people seem to like is RSD, although I've never personally used their stuff, their fans like them.
/r/seduction22/04/13 03:26 AM
2

Don't play it safe and talk to easy groups or girls that you know you can get. Start approaching the girls that get your heart beating faster because you're super attracted to them. Also, escalate faster. If you aren't moving forward, you are moving backward. I'm assuming your goal isn't to "get a girl interested", and that you'd like to be setting up dates or sleeping with them. So get the interaction to wherever you want it to go.
/r/seduction20/04/13 12:38 AM
4

I used to like MM a few years ago, not the method with the best results I've seen but good training wheels to start with. You are combining multiple phases of the interaction. If you are dead set on MM, break this part of your mental model up into smaller pieces. So you 1.) start a conversation, 2.) transition from your opening line into a "normal" conversation, and then 3.) show her you are attractive. No need to combine 2 & 3 by trying to build attraction while you transition, just transition.…
/r/seduction20/04/13 12:30 AM
2

Nightclubs tend to be loud, fast-paced, sexually charged environments. Don't use an opinion opener. Open by a.) the KA wave - waving frantically with a big smile, b.) saying "Hey I don't think I've met you yet, I'm Babayaga20000, or c.) saying "you can't look at me like that and not say hi"
/r/seduction20/04/13 12:24 AM
3

I don't disagree, but this advice will work infinitely better if you have a basic understanding of female psychology and a system so you know where you're at in the interaction. Human interaction is a super complicated thing, it's hard to learn from your mistakes if you don't have the fundamental knowledge to accurately know what your mistakes are. Same as any other sport or life skill.
/r/seduction20/04/13 12:19 AM
2

This is more of a reflection on your interactions and your relationships than it is a reflection on the girls you went to school with. I'm sure you know guys who got laid way more than twice in college. Plus now that you've got a girlfriend, I'm sure you've started to see it yourself. There are a lot of reasons college could have played out like that for you, but since you have a gf now I won't go into it. If you become single again, let me know and we can talk about it.
/r/seduction01/04/13 03:29 PM
3

I don't understand your question, what do you mean?
/r/seduction01/04/13 01:40 PM
5

Totally agree. That's why no one should take rejection personally. That being said, there are definitely good ways and bad ways to handle yourself in a conversation. My philosophy is to optimize your chances of success, and then be unfazed if it doesn't go perfectly. No one shoots 100%, but you can definitely increase your odds.
/r/seduction01/04/13 01:48 AM
26

Great article, short super interesting read. Women still want sex just as much or more than most men. Society (in the U.S. at least) just hammers them with a bunch of prude sexually judgmental BS, so they have to hide it. The dirtiest sexual fantasies I've ever heard have come from girls. Their orgasms feel 10x as good as ours do. Women still love sex and want sex. Random note, but this is why in the U.S. one of the best things you can convey to a woman is that you are sexually open, confident, …
/r/seduction01/04/13 12:56 AM
2

Dude, what a money saying! I've never heard that before. Where are you from?
/r/seduction01/04/13 12:46 AM
2

Be the best sex she has ever had. This is not a snarky or sarcastic answer, this is the best advice anyone can give you. If you blow her mind in bed, she'll think about you A LOT and go to great lengths to see you again. If you want resources to help with this, check out Sex God Method or Kickassery and if you want more advice after that, PM me and we can talk it out.
/r/seduction01/04/13 12:34 AM
18

I wouldn't suggest this as a long-term thing. This is a good game for those crippled with AA, but I would quickly switch over from doing this to actually trying to build good habits / learning how to do well. I actually think the "who cares if it went poorly, I didn't even want her anyway" mentality is actually a bad / dangerous mentality that people use to protect themselves from rejection. The better mentality to have is "yeah I wanted that to go well but it didn't, and I'm not going to take i…
/r/seduction31/03/13 05:12 PM
1

Indeed it is! Charlie is my roommate and the best guy I've ever seen with women. Glad you like the book! I'll pass on the kind words.
/r/seduction31/03/13 05:04 PM
1

No, not really. I'll have a drink if someone buys it for me, but I never have more than a couple drinks over the course of several hours. I actually don't like drinking while meeting girls. While it may give a temporary boost in confidence, in the beginning it handicaps one's ability to learn and improve at this. At this point I am worse when I drink, because I lose a lot of mental facility. I also avoid any girls that have been drinking a lot.
/r/seduction31/03/13 04:44 PM
1

Started learning 5 years ago, had a few periods of stagnation but generally good progress. Started living with Charlie a year and a half ago, and that's when things really took off for me.
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:34 PM
2

Hey man, not sure what you mean by "put her out". I'll see her again, I think we have a very casual hook up relationship. Personally, I don't sleep with a girl unless I can honestly say I'll want to sleep with her again. Although I don't do monogamy, I am still a quality over quantity guy.
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:32 PM
12

Hey man, appreciate the comment. If you are looking to learn to meet women, and you've never seduced anyone in your life, you're probably going to have to experiment with things that are outside your normal mode of interacting. I think pushing your comfort zone is one of the best life habits anyone can develop.
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:28 PM
15

Everyone's got different styles, if you've got something that works for you and you are getting good results, than power to you. I LOVE fake relationship roleplays. I'm always messing around, telling girls I'll marry them because they're drinking the right kind of beer, divorcing them later for spilling their drink, etc. It creates a fun world for us that they can play into. I've said similar stuff in clubs and in bars. Like I said, if you've got something that works for you, that's great. If yo…
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:25 PM
1

Thanks man. Yeah, it works, and it's consistent, which is really nice. A lot of the stuff that works didn't seem like it would when I first started out. It's all about experimenting with it. Just be open minded and try it. Find a few people that you trust (there are a lot of fakers on the internet) and model your interactions after their advice. If you're fresh out of a relationship and just starting out, I would really recommend a system. Obviously I'm biased, I like our system (Kickassery) but…
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:19 PM
1

The dancing bits are definitely crucial, but they're not very hard. I've never taken lessons or anything. I know a couple of simple spins, and I always end with a really big dip. That's all you really need.
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:08 PM
2

What Heroic Titan said.
/r/seduction30/03/13 04:02 PM
21

Thanks brother!
/r/seduction30/03/13 12:00 AM
2

Hey man, thanks for the kind words! We do have a blog. Best place to start is here. If you're on Seddit you can probably skim the article (it's on the importance of learning to be better with women) and go right to the bottom, which links to a few of my favorite posts.
/r/seduction29/03/13 11:59 PM
30

Hahaha perfectly executed!
/r/seduction29/03/13 11:57 PM
43

You can definitely train yourself to do it, I'm 100% sure of it. Start with one thing at a time. For me, I love teasing and role plays, I think they are the best way to build attraction and sexual tension. I have a ton I use, but for starters just pick one. Go with the marriage / divorce role play. Any time a girl does anything you like, go over the top and marry her (make it obvious that you are kidding and don't actually want to marry her, that will come off creepy haha). Then if she says some…
/r/seduction29/03/13 11:16 PM
27

Haha fair question, I thought that was implied. Yes we had sex when we got to my place.
/r/seduction29/03/13 10:52 PM
10

Oh man do I envy you!! I so badly wish I had realized this stuff was learnable before I started college. You are going to kill it in university!
/r/seduction29/03/13 10:05 PM
1

^ This
/r/seduction29/03/13 09:01 PM
2

Find a hobby that involves meeting people. Can be kickball, softball, dance class, wine tasting, etc. Learn to day game Go to happy hours with your co-workers. Use this as a time to get close with them and to meet new people If you can find a pre-existing social circle of cool guys and hot girls and get them to accept you into their group, that will be much quicker than building your own entirely from scratch.
/r/seduction29/03/13 08:52 PM
12

I found personally that at some point, people couldn't help but notice a change. Different haircut, different clothes, more confidence, better vocal tonality, more smiling, more girlfriends, etc. At some point everyone in my life asked "what the heck is going on?!" haha. Maybe the change isn't as drastic in everyone, but I got a wide range of reactions from the people in my life. It's funny, I also found that once I stopped hiding this part of my life, I got a lot closer with the right kind of p…
/r/seduction29/03/13 08:46 PM
11

Never apologize for trying to make yourself a better human I couldn't agree more!
/r/seduction29/03/13 08:32 PM
8

The best way I know of feeling confident about the kiss being there is to escalate physically until she is hanging out in your splash zone. I don't want to take up the entire comments section with a huge post on this, but if you want to read about it, you can check it out here. This is how I get a kiss.
/r/seduction29/03/13 08:29 PM
5

No man, if you've initiated a conversation and done a smooth transition, all you've done is successfully moved into a normal conversation. At best she's now attracted to you. Sometimes the kiss will be there, but most of the time you still have a ways to go. You still have to screen her against your standards and escalate physically. Before the kiss, you're going to want to have done some of the following: high-fived, hugged, had your arm around her, held her hand, etc. Honestly man, the above t…
/r/seduction29/03/13 08:16 PM
1

Yeah man, you need to change that dynamic asap. My buddy and I go out all the time, and we have started to refer to ourselves as a singularity. We really do whatever's best for the team. This has had an insanely positive impact on both of us. The hotter the girl he's pulling, the happier I am. Also, just for your own sake, I would stop taking responsibility for his state. You can and should try to be a good friend and help him however you can, but you shouldn't be hamstringing your own relations…
/r/seduction29/03/13 06:17 PM
22

For a beginner, I would say the easiest thing you can do is transition into a cold read. First, one quick note: make the cold reads spontaneous and use them while the conversation is flowing. I've seen a lot of beginners who will save their transitions until they've beaten the opener to death and things have already stalled awkwardly. Making your conversations full of tangents, open loops, and non sequiturs will help you immensely. If you are using an opinion opener, you could use good girl / ba…
/r/seduction29/03/13 06:08 PM
1

On why drinking is bad if you are trying to learn how to meet women: http://www.kickassacademy.com/why-alcohol-is-bad/ Why embarrassment is a BS emotion: http://www.kickassacademy.com/how-to-deal-with-embarrassment/
/r/seduction25/03/13 11:05 PM
3

You don't need to drink and you certainly don't need to lie and say you've been drinking. In fact, if you lie about it, then you are acting under the frame that it IS weird to not drink. Just own it. Never lie or be embarrassed by your actions. I wrote a blog post that I can send you if you'd like that I think you will find really helpful. Most nights when I go out, I don't drink, and I PRAY that a girl asks me why. I have developed a qualification monologue that answers the question honestly, c…
/r/seduction25/03/13 12:54 AM
2

Because you are getting no interest in text conversations, I'd say wait until next time you see her in person, then ask her out. Don't just jump right in to asking her out. Flirt with her first, get her laughing and touching you etc. Then when you've got good emotional momentum, ask her out to something specific. Up your chances of her saying yes by building a "yes ladder". Start with something that everyone says yes to like "you seem like fun, do you like [dancing, going out to bars, etc.] and …
/r/seduction25/03/13 12:41 AM
2

I think letting yourself get friend zoned is a good idea if you're looking to build a circle of friends who are girls. I would not recommend it if you're looking to hook up with the girls down the road. Social circle game and being friend zoned are different. But it's a good plan if the goal is to make friends.
/r/seduction20/03/13 05:33 AM
13

Just be honest with her. You think she's awesome and hot and want to fuck her brains out, but you're just looking for something casual. There's two ways to do this. One way is to tell her this in a conversation before any hooking up. Calibrate it so you don't sound like it's out of nowhere that you're assuming she wants to hook up. Then, next time you're out with her, you can make a move and she can decide if she wants to or not. The other way is to start making out with her, then cut it off aft…
/r/seduction20/03/13 05:29 AM
6

My favorite club opener is simple, but incredibly effective. Stand in her eyeshot, and use social proof or just having fun with your friends to get her eyes in your direction. Lock eyes with her, smile, walk over without breaking eye contact, and say "You can't look at me like that and not say hello." It's ballsy, but more effective than a standard direct opener because she started it with her eye contact.
/r/seduction18/03/13 04:01 AM
7

I think you are trying to cure the symptom instead of the problem. If you are being put into the "friend zone" you are doing something early in your interactions that is making her view you that way. I would worry less about finding a response, and instead work on making yourself someone who is viewed sexually by the women you interact with. If you work on making yourself someone she wants to sleep with, you won't need a response to "let's just be friends".
/r/seduction18/03/13 01:54 AM
3

1.) Condoms
/r/seduction18/03/13 01:49 AM
3

Waaaaaaayyyyyyy higher standards now than I had years ago. I've talked to so many more girls, kissed so many more girls, slept with so many more girls, my comparison pool is so much larger. If you are born into a village with 4 girls your age in it, whichever girl of those 4 is the coolest and most attractive will be your image of a 10. If you push yourself into thousands of interactions, your image of a 10 expands as you meet more and more girls. Combine that with my increased ability to speak …
/r/seduction18/03/13 01:41 AM
4

Call it whatever you want, we can call it 'conversational habits' if you'd prefer. I came up with them ahead of time, and if someone asks me what I do, I respond with one of those three 'conversational habits' every time.
/r/seduction17/03/13 09:35 PM
7

I don't agree, but I'm glad you posted. Especially on the part about them being "obvious to perceptive people", this is all about delivery. It has literally been years since anyone has said anything like that to me. Take the example of "what do you do?". That's a conversation that we've all had a million times. I find answering the question outright and then asking the same question back = boring, especially if you're at a high energy venue. I have a few different responses for that question, an…
/r/seduction17/03/13 09:07 PM
1

If you trust her and you're giving her the best sex of her life, what are you worried about?
/r/seduction17/03/13 06:07 PM
1

Befriend the guy. It'll show you're not scared or jealous. It'll minimize the chances that she actually cheats with him. Plus, meeting guys that are legitimately really good at this is hard to do, you might benefit from hanging around him. Also, I'm not going to make any assumptions about this, but how's your sex life? If you're regularly giving a girl the best sex of her life (which is learnable), there's not much to worry about from other guys.
/r/seduction17/03/13 05:22 PM
3

This is bad advice. If a guy can't let his girlfriend talk to other guys without getting jealous, he needs to work on his relationship and / or his confidence.
/r/seduction17/03/13 05:16 PM
6

Yes, definitely. One example would be someone with incredible social skills who just moved to a new city and knows zero girls. Assuming he has high standards (which he probably would if he's actually good at meeting women), it will take more than a day to figure out the best places to go out and to build a new social circle. But during that time he's going to keep his standards up and screen people before letting them into his life.
/r/seduction17/03/13 05:06 PM
5

^ This is why most guys have so much anxiety around women
/r/seduction17/03/13 04:51 PM
3

"Other girls that i know have told me that i have a completely fucked up view of women" "and it of course damages my game" Does it bother you because it damages your game or because it's inaccurate? I don't fully understand what your views on women are or what negative image you are giving off. That being said, if their impression of you is an accurate one, then you have to either be comfortable with people thinking it about you or you have to decide it's worth it to change. If the opinion peopl…
/r/seduction12/03/13 11:52 PM
6

As long as you're being honest with the girls, there is absolutely nothing wrong with sleeping with a lot of people. Assuming you have integrity and are okay with who you are and the results you are getting, I wouldn't change too much about yourself. Honestly you might want to start standing up for yourself more and engaging people in a dialogue about it when it comes up. For instance, when someone says you're good at "faking" or implies that what you are doing is wrong, tell them that you were …
/r/seduction12/03/13 09:14 PM
1

Yeah...if you're offering even odds, I'll happily take GSP.
/r/seduction12/03/13 09:03 PM
5

Actually, I personally don't like being in monogamous relationships and only have casual hook ups and open relationships. I am 100% in favor of honest promiscuity. But I view that as completely different from being in a "monogamous" relationship and cheating. My point is that if a girl is in an exclusive relationship, I don't like when guys go out of their way to create powerful tactics that lead girls to cheat. If they were in an open relationship, go for it. For me it comes down to being hones…
/r/seduction12/03/13 01:25 AM
2

Yeah, I guess I was thinking same time zone and comparing it to some of the other suggestions (Pittsburgh, Montreal, Boston, Colombia, etc.).
/r/seduction12/03/13 01:12 AM
1

Do you agree with the premise that dedicating ourselves to this has the potential to put us in the top 1% of the population in terms of our ability to be attractive/seductive?
/r/seduction11/03/13 09:52 PM
2

I don't agree, but I'm glad you shared your point of view. My opinion: There are a lot of good guys in this world with average game. Being just average with women doesn't make them bad people undeserving of a girlfriend. Think of any guy in your life who hasn't spent time getting really really good at this, but who you still like. The hard truth is, if that guy's girlfriend were in a bar with someone who's spent years learning how to communicate with women in an attractive/seductive way, there's…
/r/seduction11/03/13 08:52 PM
4

I would definitely agree that getting laid in NYC is easy. I would say in honesty to OP that hooking up with the best looking girls in NYC is not. I've been here for almost 4 years, and I've never found a dive bar that had consistently beautiful women in it (but if you have, I would love a PM!). The only places I've found where I know there will definitely be a number of gorgeous girls is the top Manhattan nightclubs. This is in contrast to a place like San Diego where there are gorgeous women i…
/r/seduction11/03/13 08:40 PM
5

NYC is a great place to learn, but part of the reason why is because NYC is TOUGH. There are a ton of beautiful women in the city, but access to the best venues is tricky or expensive, attitudes can be high, and social value is incredibly important. It takes a few months to really break in. I'd go with San Diego. Great weather, culture, etc. Also not to far from SF.
/r/seduction11/03/13 05:41 PM
7

Why do you want the label? If you're happy and she's happy, I would just keep on keeping on. Plus, just as an FYI, if you take on the "boyfriend" label, it comes with certain expectations and preconceived notions about what you are supposed to be and what your role is. Right now you don't have any of those.
/r/seduction11/03/13 05:26 PM
1

Sounds good man, at the end of the day it's all about enjoying yourself and having a good time! I just figured I'd flag it because I personally used to not recognize those kiss invitations when I was in school. For me, I like to take the kiss when it's there because it makes things more fun and because it serves as a sort of lock-in point in the interaction. It crystalizes her attraction and makes it stickier. Taken one step further, I know if I sleep with a girl, I have a 100% chance of seeing …
/r/seduction11/03/13 04:47 AM
2

Hey man great field report, fun to read. I like your style: confident, fun, and high energy. Just as a heads up, you might already know this / have done this, but when she grabbed you and pulled you over to the wall, that was a big invitation to go for the kiss.
/r/seduction11/03/13 03:31 AM
10

"I also gave short answers that didn't lead anywhere" Dude, this is it! If you are giving short, potentially uninteresting answers to questions, you are throwing away the opportunity to increase her attraction with your answers AND you put the conversational pressure back on yourself because now you need to take the convo somewhere new. Most conversations tend to go in the same directions. Figure out what questions you get asked often, and come up with compelling answers to them. For instance, i…
/r/seduction11/03/13 03:18 AM
2

You did the right thing by talking to those girls. The best thing you can do is get into an interaction and get out of your own head. Also, respect for staying in the pocket! A lot of guys would have tucked their tail and ran when they heard "Ohhhh that's a good line". Props for not letting it phase you :) Two other things you can do are anchoring and smiling. Anchoring is basically tying happiness to something, so that when you do that thing you get happy. I have a dance I like to do that looks…
/r/seduction11/03/13 03:05 AM
1

I work 60-80 hours a week in New York City I go out 3-5 nights a week for 1-4 hours a night. This does not count dates or nights drinking with the guys. This refers to nights where I go out to talk to multiple groups of girls I didn't know before I workout 3-4 times a week (CrossFit or MMA) I sleep ~6 hours a night I am seeing a few girls but casually (not more than once a week each) I think if someone is looking to get better at talking to women, it is really important to make it a priority. No…
/r/seduction11/03/13 02:09 AM
17

Go spend time, energy, and effort getting good at this, because there are no shortcuts
/r/seduction08/03/13 08:23 PM
1

It depends on your style and what you've done up to that point. If you haven't kissed her yet and haven't been escalating up to it, the second one is a really strong move, and she might not be in the right mindset to find it sexy. The flip of that is if you've been all over each other, making out in various corners of the bar/club and talking dirty into her ear, and you've gotten her really turned on, then the second one can be killer and work really really well.
/r/seduction08/03/13 08:20 PM
1

Las Vegas for sure! Everyone is there to have fun, people act WAY more spontaneous and adventurous from the moment they land. Everyone transforms into the person they would be if they stopped caring about people judging them. It doesn't hurt that the pool parties have some of the most stunning girls I've ever seen.
/r/seduction08/03/13 03:58 PM
1

Ditto Methaxetamine. Knowledge is a key first step in learning anything, but without practicing and gaining real life experience, it's borderline useless. The value of a good coach is that they help you maximize the value of that practice and make sure you are building good habits instead of bad ones. If you go out alone and accidentally spend 1,000 hours reinforcing bad habits, it is really really hard to break them. Just look at Tim Tebow's throwing motion. A good coach prevents that.
/r/seduction08/03/13 03:39 PM
2

This is okay Do you mean using the word girlfriend in a story? Like "Yeah a year ago when I was traveling through Austin with my girlfriend...". If you are telling a story about you and an ex-girlfriend, and you are early in the interaction, I think it is fine to say girlfriend and then correct yourself later on if she asks about it. This is not okay Making up a relationship or fabricating a fake girlfriend. If you are doing the latter, mind sharing why? What are you trying to accomplish? There'…
/r/seduction08/03/13 03:31 PM
2

Push / Pull Rather than always being nice or always teasing a girl, you almost schizophrenically alternate between the two. Amaaaaaazingly effective, it makes your flirting high-octane and avoids coming off as just a nice guy or a dick.
/r/seduction08/03/13 03:24 PM
5

Hey man, sorry about that, during high traffic the website has trouble rendering that particular widget. We've killed the widget and are going to work with Wordpress to prevent it from happening again. Check it out now, it should be good to go.
/r/seduction28/02/13 06:29 AM
10

I would suggest either teasing or role plays. I love doing both of these things, they are so much fun. If you do it right, you should have the girl laughing and getting attracted to you. Make sure you escalate physically while you are doing it (high fives for good things, playful pushing, hugs, etc.). Teasing / role plays + physicality = a super fun, sexually charged interaction :) Example: Role Play - marry her over something trivial, than divorce her When you are talking to a girl and she says…
/r/seduction28/02/13 05:03 AM
1

The easiest way to follow us would be on twitter or our email listserve. We don't push any products via email, we simply use it to update readers when we post new articles. The best free resource I know of is here: http://www.theattractionforums.com/classic-writings/ I especially like Braddock, reading his stuff helped take my interactions with women to the next level. The best book I've ever read on pickup is Magic Bullets. Kickass has become an affiliate for this product because we recommend i…
/r/seduction21/02/13 03:25 PM
1

Sounds like you're in a good place man, probably a bit more advanced than the people I had in mind when I wrote the article. No fear of rejection = ready to conquer the world :-)
/r/seduction16/02/13 04:18 AM
6

Totally agree on the dancing advice here! When you dance, totally commit to it. Check this video out. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=honzPhGqcE4 I'm not suggesting you have to dance like this, but check out how all of the eyes are on him, girls are laughing, smiling, and want to dance with him. Now imagine if he were actually dressed well, he'd kill it. Also, having a friend doing the exact same or similar ridiculous dance moves is clutch. You go from a wacky loser to two dudes having a blast wh…
/r/seduction06/02/13 03:46 AM
9

It depends on the vibe of the club and the volume of the music. I'm going to assume loud dance club, so correct me if I'm wrong. Things escalate quickly in a club. Your words (probably your best asset in most venues) are hard to hear and attention spans are short at first, so you need to be SUPER loud and high energy. Be touchy! Start touching early, high fives, side hugs, hugs, ass grabs. Escalate quickly. You can get a kiss in a club within 30 seconds if your body language is rock solid and yo…
/r/seduction06/02/13 03:33 AM
1

The above is for when you first meet a girl. In my opinion, you can compliment your girlfriend whenever you want.
/r/seduction22/01/13 12:46 AM
1

Dude - YES. Push/pull is the greatest.
/r/seduction21/01/13 02:59 AM
1

I agree with these comments, such as going to the gym and putting together a cool life with interesting hobbies. That being said, go buy The Game and go buy Magic Bullets. That's where to start. Find a friend who also wants to meet women and get better with women, and go out with him four nights a week. Push your comfort zone. Try to follow the advice in those books, even if it makes you uncomfortable. If you dive into it and make it a priority, you will be shocked at how good your results can b…
/r/seduction20/01/13 10:08 PM
1

This is great advice, totally nailed it. Set goals that are completely within your control.
/r/seduction20/01/13 09:47 PM
120

For what it is worth, I don't think it is that she doesn't believe it or thinks you are being polite. If she is hot, she knows it. I think the real reason is two-fold. First, if she's a hot girl, she's heard it a million times before. It's not special and it gets boring to hear after a while. Second, it's that she thinks you're acting like every other guy that wants to fuck her for her looks and doesn't give a shit about who she is or what is going on in her head. You aren't making her work for …
/r/seduction20/01/13 09:41 PM
180

This one has worked a ton of times for me. I wait until she's holding eye contact with me, and her eyes have a flirty or mischievous glint to them. "If you keep looking at me like that, I'm going to kiss you" I say this with a smirk or a sly grin. Don't rush it, say it confidently. She will: a.) Smile, look away, then look back and hold eye contact. Kiss her. b.) Smile and hold eye contact. Kiss her. c.) Say "Like what?" and smile and hold eye contact. Kiss her. If she pretends like she doesn't …
/r/seduction20/01/13 09:23 PM
2

I had my arms around her waist with my hands resting lightly on her lower back. So we were facing each other with about a foot of space between us. Hope that helps with the visual.
/r/seduction15/01/13 11:17 PM
2

Yep, that's my roommate. He and I go out together 3-4 nights a week and we're always learning from each other's game.
/r/seduction15/01/13 11:12 PM
6

"Teasing" when I use the word is describing something playful and flirty. Teasing isn't something that is done in a way that is actually mean and it isn't something that would make a girl feel bad. It's delivered in a way that should make the girl laugh. For me, teasing isn't something reserved exclusively for the first time you meet a girl. That playful vibe is a part of every interaction going forward.
/r/seduction14/01/13 12:08 PM
3

Hey thanks man, appreciate it. The conversation wasn't verbally super sexual before the first kiss, but there was a lot of touching the entire time. It was only a few minutes, mostly her asking me questions (like what do I do, why am I in NYC, etc.) and me telling stories about myself. At one point I called her "trouble" for the way she was looking at me and said that "my mom warned me about girls like you, girls that always make you late for work the next day" (said with a grin). That was about…
/r/seduction14/01/13 12:04 PM
2

Hey man, my number 1 piece of advice would be don't beat yourself up about any of it. Getting good at game takes time and effort. Everyone gets rejected, anyone claiming they have a 100% success rate is a liar and probably selling snake-oil. The trick is not letting it bother you. The best thing you can do is practice. After thousands of interactions, the victories and the defeats both feel less important [although being able to pull hot girls still feels pretty awesome every time :-) ] Also, se…
/r/seduction14/01/13 05:55 AM
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