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BxGyrl416 Archive

View 9 posts and 303 comments by BxGyrl416 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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57

I think this is exactly what Reddit wanted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/22 12:15 AM
10

Google the “photographer” Chris Arnade. I’m from the Bronx and we tried to get him to stop because that he was doing was so exploitative. Naturally, the good liberal women said he was giving a voice to the voiceless, representing the underclass – fill in offensive libfem rhetoric here. He even win an award at a women’s blog conference some years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/04/22 01:01 AM
23

Such a sub exists on Reddit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/22 09:39 PM
250

She’s so woke she can’t bring herself to say Black.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/03/22 01:52 PM
4

It depends. I’m not completely against age gaps, but you have to be very realistic, as most with large gaps are unhealthy ridden with red flags. Realistically, I guy in his 40s is more likely to be divorced and if he’s never been married, that opens a whole Pandora’s box of questions. I do think men in your league within your age range do exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/22 08:25 PM
18

Some people don’t want to understand.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:52 PM
61

And it’s almost almost a woman who won’t play house with him and won’t put up with his shit that he’ll marry because he doesn’t respect the one he’s with now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:51 PM
26

And that’s another thing. You want your kids – especially if they’re girls – seeing how you’re willing to let their father disrespect you? But apparent as somebody above pointed out, her mom was a single mother, so she probably didn’t know her father or he was a POS like dude over here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:49 PM
46

A lot of the people commenting like that are probably themselves shacking up with some guy who has them brainwashed that marriage is just a piece of paper.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:47 PM
22

Kind of like feminism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:45 PM
259

It’s not that he’s not ready, it’s that he has no reason to when she’s giving him all of the wife benefits. A lot of women doesn’t get the difference between being a wife and being some guy’s “wifey.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:45 PM
42

I didn’t read this, but it makes sense (see my prior comment.) It just completely boggles my mind how you grow up in this, see your mom and other women in your community struggling, then you fall right into the same trap yourself. Why do these women have kids with these not shit men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:43 PM
13

Likewise. I knew y’all were just making your popcorn and reading in trepidation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:40 PM
163

He loves regular sex, loves his “legacy,” loves her cooking for him and cleaning up after his messes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:37 PM
38

I’m confused how she’s confused. Dated a year, get pregnant – no ring. Go on to have the kid – no ring. Move in together – no ring. Proceed to have a second kid – no ring. Oh, but he says he wants to marry her. Right, he says, but he’s not done a damn thing to back up those empty promises. I’m equally perplexed and infuriated by women who keep falling for this bullshit. What’s worst is you saw your grandma, you mom, your aunts, your cousins, yours sisters, and your girls go through the same bull…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/22 11:35 PM
195

Anytime a guy told me his ex was “crazy” or a “psycho bitch,” it’s because of something he had done to her. One “psycho” had an order of protection against him, which he’d later go on to violate and brutalize her (she lived, thankfully.) Another “controlling, malcontented, gold digger” was that way because he cheated on her and she got revenge by sucking him dry before divorcing him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/03/22 06:48 PM
15

Where are they getting their data? Without revealing much, it says I’m one of less than of 1,000 of my “kind” in the US. This seems like an entertainment tool.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/03/22 01:50 AM
14

I notice that being a “threat” or “unapproachable” is almost never even a thing when describing men. I was very shy in high school and didn’t speak much unless it was to people I already knew or who were outsiders as well. One day a friend of mine mentioned that the girls didn’t really talk to me much because they were intimidated by me. Intimidated how? I never really spoke much, so how is that intimidating? Or maybe that’s the point? Whenever a woman is in high position at work or in politics,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/22 08:04 PM
11

They practically give out trophies for seeing women as kinda equal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 03:00 AM
23

I was on one “feminism” sub months ago and some chick was soothing “allies” by telling them that being a feminist or ally is exhausting, so you don’t have to always adhere to feminist principles. I’m like, Wait, WHAT? Then what the hell are you here for? No, you do not get to pick and choose when you see women as human beings. TFOH… I think I may have been banned from that one. They make the bar so damn low as it is, then you have these self-loathing ones co-signing this shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 02:59 AM
19

Truth. Misogyny and anti-Blackness run rampant on Reddit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 02:54 AM
16

I read all about this in a sub a few months ago and it’s disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/03/22 02:51 AM
168

It’s odd that she had to include this at all. His employment status has zero to do with his stealing her card. She’s trying to justify it to herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 11:15 PM
7

I guess we’re about to see a lot 90 Day Fiancé scenarios. Nothing like milking a colossal disaster for sex. How depraved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 12:51 AM
194

I guess I’m just confused. If they were dating 3 months, I’d say fine. But 2 years is a significant amount of time never to meet any of his family or friends. And was he coming to meet her or were they meeting in public or a hotel? It never occurred to her that she really knows nothing about him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/22 12:48 AM
24

Are these chicks for real? Somebody lied to you. What aren’t they getting?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/22 01:21 AM
9

Of course not, because women are supposed to smile and shut up. Women holding men accountable is a threat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/22 01:16 PM
11

Precisely. But these pick-mes fall for it hook, line, and sinker every time. They don’t even have to do the dirty work when so many women have been programmed to rag on other women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 11:40 PM
25

Now, could you imagine if we didn’t have good intentions and thought the way they do?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 11:33 PM
19

The thing is, virtually all so-called “toxic femininity” are behaviors that are a result of adaptions to misogyny and patriarchy, not natural, organic behaviors.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/02/22 11:13 PM
30

Holdings casual fling accountable…hmm. How does that work? These kinds of stories were exactly why I stayed clear of one night stands when I was in the dating game. It’s kind of expected that he would ghost her after the casual sex and abortion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/22 01:32 PM
4

If you’re unsure, don’t until you are sure. You get to move to accompany him to support his goals. What are you getting out of it? Plus, I’m not into women moving in with men when there’s no ring or wedding date.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/22 03:56 PM
63

Well, apparently the latest revelation is that some guys think wiping one’s self after defecating is “gay,” so the same may apply.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/22 05:14 PM
9

Low self-esteem. These women’s parents usually influence their choices in partners.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/02/22 01:26 PM
40

When I was 24, I would have gone for it because I was somewhat more mature than many of my male peers. Now at pushing 40, a 10 year difference is the upper limit to what I’d ever say is appropriate. But at 24 you’re just out of college, maybe in grad school, or the beginning of your career. By 34, you’ve likely has a decade of work experience under your belt and are thinking marriage/kids. You’re a two different stages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/22 05:15 PM
4

Imagine being bored of your spouse after 3 years at age 23.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/22 06:28 PM
1

Not sure where you’re getting your info from, because it’s completely wrong. Just the opposite. Source: been a woman for nearly 39 years she happily married.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/01/22 12:54 AM
11

Oh, that’s easy. They want their cake and to eat it too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 05:19 PM
11

But she isn’t the wife, and really, she isn’t even the fiancée. He’s moved on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 12:42 PM
69

I don’t get this either. It’s lose-lose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 04:38 AM
35

And there you have it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 03:25 AM
35

Because marriage is a big commitment (I’ve actually heard this several times.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 02:04 AM
39

It almost never ends well, especially for the kids. But women’s lib. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 02:01 AM
30

So perplexing. The counterpoint to these men is the women with rock-bottom self-esteem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/01/22 12:08 AM
1

My fiancé is very liberal, much more so than me on things regarding racial and economic issues but is no where near where I am on the feminist movement. That’s a really odd statement, especially calling yourself a feminist. Feminism isn’t just about women like you, it’s about all women. I’m curious as to how you consider yourself a feminist if you aren’t progressive when it comes to race and socioeconomic issues. That’s contradictory.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 09:31 PM
3

⬆️⬆️⬆️ All this right here. I was thinking the exact same thing regarding your analogy to White people and racism.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 09:27 PM
9

I think a lot of girls and women fall into this trap. They’re a daddy’s girl or grandpa’s girl or adore their older brother or cousin, only to find out (or be in denial forever) that he’s not shit. How she sees her male relatives treating women is what she’s going to come to expect and normalize. I see so many “liberal” or “woke” or “progressive” women championing causes, then their not shit brother or uncle or father shows his ass, gets called out, and she’s like, “C’mon, guys, he’s a good guy,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 09:26 PM
1

He owns property with this woman, yet she’s his girlfriend, not his wife – and please don’t tell me he doesn’t believe in marriage. There’s your first tip off.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/22 09:18 PM
3

Absolutely not. It makes me realize I made the right choice. I thought this when I was unmarried and didn’t believe I’d ever get married, and I still feel this way as I’m married, no kids, and creep towards 40.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/01/22 05:20 PM
1

I don’t think the person that created this knows what “thick” means.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/01/22 05:21 PM
44

This is an incredibly astute summary.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/22 03:33 AM
70

I have men debate with me who won’t back down even if I use statistics versus “mY fEeLiNgS” and even when I point out that I have 2 degrees on the topic. They still will speak over me. Maybe it’s not that you think that you’re right as much as you think that a woman can’t be right or more knowledgeable or smarter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/12/21 06:14 PM
6

Do we have to tilt our hips forward? I’d guess it would just flow downwards just the way ours does.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/12/21 01:28 PM
11

This right here. I refuse. I never wanted kids and this made it an easy decision.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 10:41 PM
62

This is why I’m baffled why so many women think reproducing is the end all and be all of womanhood. It’s not. Your story and the woman’s story in the post is too common. In addition to holding down a full-time job, we’re then expected to cook, maintain the home, and care for the children. I don’t see how anybody could voluntarily sign up for that. It’s as if they think that they’re the exception, this this time things will be different. Women give up way too much and receive very little in retur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 10:36 PM
20

Agreed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 10:31 PM
27

People who lie about tiny, insignificant things lie about big things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/10/21 08:03 PM
1

Both, I believe. Look at it like this: are you buying that big ring and having that huge, expensive wedding for yourselves or other people? Most of it is the later, for optics. Or we could just ask Jennifer Lopez.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 08:21 PM
1

It’s been statistically proven that people who buy/receive big engagement rings are exponentially more likely to get divorced (this goes for cost of wedding too.) Take that for what it’s worth. That said, I don’t think there is or should be any set rule. If you man can afford a huge stone, more power to you, but like somebody commented, a lot of LV wealthy guys use that as a power play. I also give side eye to guys who give crappy costume jewelry rings and the women who accept them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/21 04:17 PM
3

What part is she not getting?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 06:01 PM
6

Men are always dumbfounded when you flip the script on them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/21 12:06 AM
23

As soon as you said energy drink, I knew this wouldn’t end well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 12:41 PM
26

TLDR; Wife is basically being bullied into finding her soon-to-be replacement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/21 12:24 PM
3

Reading this description, all I could think of is Hunt’s Point. If you don’t know the reference, it’s a mishmash of all of the above.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 07:27 PM
36

I wouldn’t trust a musician not to cheat as far as I can throw him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 07:24 PM
12

They also have to work nights and pretty much all holidays.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 07:23 PM
13

This. That’s an automatic no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/10/21 03:46 PM
4

NVM and PickMes pretend not to understand the difference between men tearing down women, and perpetuating misogyny and women having a safe space to venting and commiserate about said misogyny and hatred.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/21 06:19 PM
14

You ever watch something in a movie or read something that makes you almost physically uncomfortable? Yeah, that was this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 10:55 PM
94

Well, for the unborn kids’ sake, that’s kind of a relief. If she had kids with this loser, she’d be trapped with him. She still has a window of time to smarten up and leave his pathetic ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 09:35 PM
89

See, that’s it. So many men have this “grass is always greener” attitude towards commitment and marriage. Even if she’s a 9.5, he’ll quit her to try to find a 10. The part about them having other women in their bedroom is just about the icing on this rotten wedding cake.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 09:31 PM
27

Sigh This is just sad. It’s hard to believe that somebody’s self-esteem could be so low that they would ever accept this. And you say he graduated from an Ivy League – how? This guy sounds like a complete burnout with no sort of self-awareness. What does she get out of this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/09/21 09:28 PM
33

I make jokes about just about everything, but there are just some lines you don’t cross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/09/21 02:42 AM
21

I’ve been banned from a few subs for the same reason but not that sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 11:49 PM
118

Hey, with 3 kids and soon to be infant, you may just get that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 03:06 PM
82

That’s that’s not a red flag, that’s a green light – to step on the accelerator and put the pedal to the metal!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/09/21 03:06 PM
12

I was just told that I need to “level up” instead of hating on pretty women. The OP’s post is very decisive and lacks self-awareness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 08:34 PM
12

You’re on a pro-women sub degrading other women. Sounds like you’re the one with the problem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 08:29 PM
83

That’s the part where not living with a guy before marriage comes in. I read about these kinds of scenarios constantly on AITA and Relationship Advice.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:55 PM
10

Agreed. They should hear some of the things said to their overweight, older, average to below average looking peers (which is in the eye of the beholder, by the way.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:49 PM
22

This is exactly what I was thinking as I read the post. It’s been proven that the closer you are to conventional beauty (read: White, younger, thin, tall, small waist, large breasts in the United States), the better life outcomes in terms of jobs, income, and general lifestyle you have. I wonder if all these 10s would trade places with a 5 or a 7. I highly doubt it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:48 PM
9

I was getting this from the post too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:43 PM
8

That’s kind of fetish-y in and of itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:41 PM
23

This right here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:39 PM
11

Nah. I usually will agree with this posts but that’s a negative. Conventionally attractive people statistically have an easier time will all aspects of life. I wouldn’t mind not having to put much effort into things knowing it’ll be handed to me whether or not I’m qualified or deserved it. This is not it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 03:37 PM
10

I got a message last week telling me I’m sexist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/09/21 04:47 AM
45

A perfect example of this is the so-called “opioid crisis.” White kids are getting hooked on and overdosing on heroin, so now it’s a problem. Meanwhile, it never went away in the hood and so many of the addicts went to prison for their addictions, while the wealthy and middle class White kids go to rehab in a country club setting. There’s blocks here where you will see needles on the ground and see people shooting up in plain sight. Over the past 5+ years I’m starting to see White kids here from…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 12:37 PM
58

Yup. I live in the Bronx, NY and there was a point in time in the early 2000s that there were maybe a half dozen Black girls and women missing, believed to be dead, yet you never heard about it on the news. Meanwhile, a young White middle class gentrifier was found dead across the bridge in Upper Manhattan and that’s all you heard about for weeks. I noticed the homemade flyers of the Black women on telephone poles as I walked to and from school but never heard anything about them on any news out…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 12:29 PM
55

I was in Denmark several years ago and I was blown away by the fact that they don’t lock their bikes up when they leave them for the day. I live in New York and the bike would be gone in 10 seconds if we did that here. They are pretty homogeneous countries with a very high standard of life and wealthy, so I don’t think some of them get that you can’t do the kinds of things that are common in Scandinavia.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/09/21 12:18 PM
16

It’s written by a man, which is a problem in itself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 01:36 PM
25

The fact that it’s a man answering his letter tells you everything you need to know. A man’s got to tell it to him for him to believe it because what women say is never valid unless a man repeats it or steals it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/09/21 12:35 PM
12

When men wear skimpy outfits, starve themselves, spend thousands of dollars on make-up and hair removal, and are objectified on a stage, maybe I’ll see it another way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 09:32 PM
17

Ironically, the Relationship Advice sub bans people if they see you participate on FDS. We can see why. There’s nothing sex positive or liberating about this. He’s a misogynistic person that enjoys violating and preying on women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/09/21 04:30 AM
27

I always saw Diddy (some of us still refer to him as Puffy) as a wannabe. Yeah, he “discovered” a lot of acts, but his own skills are mediocre at best. He’s kind of like to Biggie what Fat Joe is to Big Pun (I think my 90s NY heads will get what I mean.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:31 PM
26

That he’s just bitter and acidic?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 04:28 PM
35

You’re not wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:14 PM
69

At some point even most celebrities get married. He’s always seemed to be a playboy. Now that he’s pushing 50, it’s just getting a little weird.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:13 PM
168

He hasn’t aged well, to say the least.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:11 PM
158

I don’t get the hype. He used to be all up in those teeny bopper magazines 25-30 years ago. Now he’s looking like Jack Nicholson. How is he still pulling teenage girls and early twentysomethings? He’s giving off real dirty old man vibes. Make it make sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/09/21 12:11 PM
231

Sometimes you can trace their IP address. Threatening someone’s life with physical harm or rape is a crime.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/21 10:56 AM
-10

That’s on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/09/21 09:13 PM
-1

I have two degrees (including an advanced degree) in social sciences and many years of experience, so I’m not going by feelings or opinions on this. I’m basing my responses on actual social science.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 07:20 PM
1

A real easy one is when women and girls play the “I’m not like the other girls” angle and put down other women. There’s certainly a lot of internalized misogyny on this sub. I see a lot of women defending misogyny. I don’t know whether it’s just so deeply ingrained in them that this is their response or that they consciously believe that by downing other women that they’re going to gain something with men. If you’re serious about Learning more about internalized misogyny, this article is a great…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 07:15 PM
1

It’s apparent that you’re very uneducated and have a lot of your own prejudices to deal with, so I’m not going to argue with you anymore. And by the way? It’s very apparent that you have a lot of internalized misogyny (and uphold White Supremacy) based on your responses. Trying to down other women and agree with sexist men doesn’t exalt you, it just exemplifies how deep misogyny runs.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 07:09 PM
1

It has nothing to do with being a woman or female or feminine, it’s all internalized misogyny. Toxic femininity is no more valid or real than reverse racism.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 07:03 PM
1

But who created patriarchy and who benefits from upholding it? Some women do uphold patriarchy because they believe throwing other women under the bus or showing they’re “different than the other girls” will win favor from men, but the only ones who are hurt in the end is women. However, the idea of toxic femininity is no more legitimate than saying that because Black people uphold colorism (a legacy of colonialism and White Supremacy) that they are the ones who are actually racist. From a socio…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:59 PM
1

You’re essentially saying that internal misogyny experienced by women is women’s own fault. You should probably learn about internalized misogyny and check your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:51 PM
1

Where in the world are you getting this from?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:39 PM
1

Again, none of that is toxic femininity. These are learned behaviors that are in response to the misogyny that women face. In fact, a lot of women engage in internalized misogyny and don’t even realize they’re doing it because it’s so pervasive. These behaviors are all a response to patriarchy. If a girl grew up without ever experiencing misogyny or sexism, without ever being objectified, without ever being given the societal message that she’s not a “real” woman if she chooses not to have kids,…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:38 PM
0

Unusual cases? How many times have we heard boys being told to “Stop crying and man up,” or something analogous? That’s pretty explicit.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:31 PM
-1

Nearly all examples you’ve given are the result of patriarchy and in some cases, racism and misogynoir. None are innate to women, they’re taught and conditioned.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:28 PM
2

Women didn’t decide that we would be relegated to motherhood and domestic work. Anatomically and biologically, most of us are capable of being mothers. We didn’t decide that domestic work was a woman’s thing, men out that in us.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:26 PM
-1

But most of the judgement from women against other women is a byproduct of patriarchy and misogyny, not because it’s specific to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/08/21 06:24 PM
46

I think this of the part most people fail to understand. A “50/50 relationship” between a woman and man is never 50/50. Most men are paid more than us, it is women who take 9 months out of their lives (if they choose to) to have a child – and months to recuperate (multiply this by 2 or 3, for most women), and get stuck doing the domestic labor like cooking, cleaning, taking care of the kids, etc. What is 50/50 about this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 04:13 PM
25

If you can’t afford a ring as a one time purchase, how are you going to afford rent, utilities, and food?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/21 04:08 PM
1

Of course he is. There are men on all feminist subs, some even pretending to be women, derailing and talking over women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/08/21 12:56 PM
25

He’s a White male. He’ll never be canceled.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 07:33 PM
40

He just can’t stop. The more he talks, the more he puts his foot in his mouth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/21 04:01 AM
36

I think this is important. We talk a lot about LVM, bad behavior, and what is lacking. I’m a strong proponent of modeling behavior and leading by example.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 06:03 PM
276

As I read this post, all I can think about is John Mayer throughout his career.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/21 05:29 PM
3

Right here raises hand
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 09:13 PM
26

He gets her pregnant.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 09:10 PM
8

Congratulations, you’re well on the road to being a single teen mom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 09:09 PM
6

You reap what you sow. This is what he wanted – Sophie didn’t initiate this. The ever changing goalposts. It seems that open marriages are fine until the person who was lukewarm or against it levels up and ends up being more successful than the one who initiated it. Nick is a manipulator and sleaze (age gap relationship, such a shocker.) Sophie needs to move on. She has time before she needs to think about settling down. She can do so much better and hopefully she’s beginning to see that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/21 04:48 PM
3

When I got to be in my early 20s (college age), I came to the conclusion that there’s about a 5-6 year maturity lag between men and women. That said, age matters as 18 and 24 is much different than 28 and 34 or 50 and 56.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/21 01:33 PM
28

I can’t remember who, but years ago I had a guy that would do that. I found it highly annoying and invasive, so I’d often delay answering for hours.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/08/21 12:40 PM
44

Why does her BF know so much about sex work? Of course he supports it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 09:42 PM
62

Drugs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 07:58 PM
47

Just a thought: most men love sex. If sex work were so empowering, why wouldn’t more men get paid to do what they love?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 02:33 PM
31

Yes, nearly all male sex workers are queer. I’m sure there are but I’ve yet to meet or hear of a straight male sex worker.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 02:29 PM
38

It’s no accident that nearly all sex workers are women or marginalized transgender or gay youth. I dare anyone to tell me the last time they saw a cisgender straight man doing sex work.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/08/21 02:23 PM
4

DormLife
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 04:39 AM
18

That’s all it really is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 04:04 AM
46

The questioning and challenging is something a lot of guys do in general. I’m a grown ass woman. I will no longer even entertain men who act like this. I just end the conversation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/08/21 04:03 AM
24

This is important. I think girls who grow up with parents who modeled a healthy relationship are far less likely to gravitate towards dysfunctional guys like this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 02:30 AM
11

It’s almost September, so probably early May. 🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 02:28 AM
40

I’m 38 and I see 30 year olds as kids. No way would I have dated someone’s young.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 02:26 AM
77

Lovebombing. She literally has no life experience or frame of reference to realize how not normal this is.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 02:23 AM
20

I used to be the type that gave the benefit of the doubt in age gap relationships and even was involved with a man many years my senior in my 20s. Over the past 2 years, since joining Reddit and reading dozens of relationship stories, I’ve been conditioned to see major red flags anytime a woman is in a relationship with a man much older. It never fails. That’s like setting the stage for unhealthy power dynamics so that nothing that’s mentioned after comes as a surprise.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/08/21 02:19 AM
23

I’ve learned that as a rule men who are cheap with their wallets lack in other aspects as well. Even if he isn’t traditional, he should at very least acknowledge that she is and do things that make her feel appreciated. From what it sounds like, he’s just an all around cheapskate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 08:19 PM
3

I had make friends like that, they’d quickly be ex-friends. I’m done explaining things to men who are so invested in not understanding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/21 04:32 PM
6

He’s literally blaming women for conditions that men created and continue to uphold.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 05:23 PM
6

Some people just have no boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 04:50 PM
119

This. A threesome is always opening Pandora’s box. Or my friend says, you can’t put the genie back into the lamp.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 04:09 PM
21

I saw this. It almost never ends well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 04:08 PM
16

Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 01:12 PM
293

That’s the other thing. When women don’t like a man, we have nothing more to do with him and avoid him completely. When a man doesn’t like a woman, he will antagonize, harass, or try to intimidate her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:47 AM
799

Red Pill-ers like to have sex with women and want access to us, but don’t like or respect us. FDS-ers want to have relationships with men, but we have self-respect and aren’t going to put up with abuse, mistreatment, and misogyny. Whether potential romantic partners, bosses, coworkers, or even strangers on the bus, it really burns the fuck out of some men when a woman has dignity, confidence, and self-worth. You cannot cut a person down who values themselves. They will always get back up. Edit: …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:44 AM
20

Men who stare are creepy AF. Where I’m from, when somebody stares intensely at you, man or woman, it’s taken as a somebody is trying to challenge you. I have no qualms staring right back. That tells you a lot about his motives. It’s used to intimidate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:13 AM
25

Not gonna say who, but somebody very close to me began his affair at a funeral.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 02:11 AM
53

There’s never any moment too awkward to try to get in somebody’s pants. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/21 01:36 AM
97

I guess it may have come off as argumentative towards a couple of women who called FDS “toxic,” but I then asked what is toxic about having standards and self-respect when looking for a potential partner? Ironically, one or two people suggested the young female poster check out FDS because of the dating issues she was having. I don’t get it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 11:38 PM
365

I got banned from there 2 days ago because “FDS.” Maybe if more people learned what FDS was, they wouldn’t need advice to navigate their unhealthy relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 11:21 PM
88

Yeah, I don’t like the idea of a woman being out of the workforce for so long with no income of her own and being in such a vulnerable position depending solely on somebody else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 02:32 PM
53

I mean, if that’s what you really want – and I mean what you really want, not what your parents expect of you, not what’s convenient for your husband. Hey, if you and/or your husband are independently wealthy and you don’t have to work, more power to you. For most women, those years away from the office severely negatively impact upon our future career prospects. Yeah, I know that’s what a lot of people expect of us, but then we get typecast as the mom who will go on maternity leave or need to l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 02:30 PM
18

Don’t ask for an opinion if you don’t want to hear the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 12:41 PM
57

All of this should have been discussed before she became pregnant. It always just blows my mind how unprepared and how little thought a lot of people give to bringing another human being into the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 12:40 PM
257

What do you mean “we” got pregnant? No, you got pregnant. Are you seriously asking if your husband should chip in for prenatal care for his unborn child?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/21 04:01 AM
74

Run, don’t walk.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/21 01:47 AM
72

I used to carry a knife to until I was attacked by a gang of girls (this happened when I was 17) and they were within an inch of finding it on me. After that I stopped. I don’t advise carrying a knife unless you’re very confident and skilled at using it, lest somebody use it against you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 11:17 PM
2

Oh, so you know the story. I did not expect that at all. I’d known him for years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 11:56 AM
253

And this fool is laughing like this is a joke.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/21 01:20 AM
160

Rock bottom self-esteem. I’ll give you a hard stare if you stink and sit next to me on the train. You wanna be having these guys take their clothes off and touching you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 11:33 PM
452

Having sex with a man who doesn’t shower. 🤢🤮
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 09:16 PM
9

Before this, I never would have suspected. Looking back, there were some red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 07:42 PM
22

Translation: I don’t have parameters and certainly won’t respect yours.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:41 PM
25

That always gets me. So, that’s really the only thing stoppin’ ya from going after somebody who is almost a child. Nice to know this information so that I can stay clear and make sure other girls and women know to too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:40 PM
11

Unless that confident woman is making her own choices about what works for her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:39 PM
14

Asking any woman or BIPOC or LGBTQ person to pick a time in the past that they’d liked to have lived always goes downhill very quickly. It’s like, Gees, let me think of which ways I’d like to be impressed and in danger’s way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:38 PM
34

I stay my distance after being burned by them, but many my friends and acquaintances are part of lefty/socialist/communist/Marxist circles. It always seems like there never fails to be that one dude who ends up getting called out for sexually harassing, sexually assaulting, or acting inappropriately with the women in the group. Naturally, most of the other guys who know will front for him and take shots at his victims. I’ve come to the conclusion that a lot of them join these spaces because wome…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:27 PM
27

Isn’t that literally the “negging” technique people keep referring to from that book, “The Pick-up Artist” (I think that’s the name)? Using a woman’s insecurity (or alleged insecurity, here) to get her to do what you want. It’s just the opposite – a woman with high self-esteem is going to look at him and laugh…and leave.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:20 PM
13

This seems to be the case. I’ve come across so many guys where I live (it’s not quite the hood, but just a step or two above) who are perpetually worried about potential “gold diggers” taking advantage of them. It’s like, most of you live in your mama’s house and have no “gold.” You worried about dropping cash on the McDonald’s menu a few nights a week? Worry about actually getting cash.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 06:12 PM
51

This sounds an awful lot like my ex-friend. I thought he was BSing me when he’d talk about the one night stands/NSA sex he’d have. Then one day he showed me a photo (I didn’t see any genitals, but it was clear what was going on) and I’m kind of floored. It seemed apparent that he took these photos without consent. It shouldn’t have shocked me later that he ended up being sentenced to 75 to life for breaking into his ex-girlfriend/children’s mother’s home and brutally raping her and torturing her…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/21 02:41 PM
95

I read something similar a few hours ago (that’s since been deleted) about a woman who’s husband confided in her that he’s attracted to teens. This revelation comes the same day the next door neighbor is hauled away in handcuffs by the FBI. The husband’s all of a sudden hyper and high-strung, tossing and turning in bed. Hmm. An innocent person doesn’t just blurt these things out years into a marriage after the neighbor’s going to prison over some unknown serious crime.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 06:51 PM
6

This is the #1 move out of most OLD guys’ playbook. Maybe it’s because I was well out of grad school with a full-time job when text messaging became a thing, so I didn’t come of age with it. I didn’t do the “Do we have text message compatibility?” thing. I didn’t intend to spend hours texting somebody. If he is serious, we’d exchange some messages, figure out if we have anything in common, exchange #s, and set up a date. I encountered a lot of men who wanted a pen pal or texting buddy. I don’t l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 06:45 PM
8

That’s exactly what I’m saying. If you can get by on looks, what’s the incentive to work harder than you have to at life?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 05:11 PM
8

I think we’re talking about two different things here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 05:09 PM
17

That’s why when I was OLD, I was really turned off by guys who I’d be messaging with who’d ask me to take photos of myself to send. GTFOH. The first time or two I obliged, but then they wanted body shots, something more form fitting/revealing, FaceTime…don’t have any time for that. Really, at that point I preferred to message back and forth and meet relatively soon in the game or else I’d have these guys who just wanted to text and ask for pix. Go pay for a Pornhub subscription, leave me alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:33 PM
19

I think this is an odd sentiment. Studies have shown over and over again that people who are considered conventionally beautiful have more and better options in life in terms of careers, partners, opportunities, and life outcomes. People who are “attractive” and thin make more money and usually get better job offers than people who are overweight and below average looking, even if the latter individual is much more educated, experienced, and talented. Don’t feel too bad for beautiful people. Als…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:27 PM
40

On the flip side, a lot of people who’ve always been considered beautiful/handsome have been objectified and a lot of time their looks become their defining “personality” trait. They’ve never had to develop grit or work on their personality because things came easy to them. A lot of these same people are terribly insecure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:21 PM
12

I saw that yesterday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 03:16 PM
17

Truth. By the way, employers do this too. This reads as so familiar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/21 12:58 AM
34

Wouldn’t it be ironic to create a forum to discuss how to find and date people that we hate? Oh, wait…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 09:33 PM
74

I don’t even really think misandry is a thing. In all my years of interacting with feminists – and, really, just other women in general – I’ve yet to meet any who legitimately hate or despise men. Any distrust of men as a whole is due to living as a girl/woman in society. That’s not the same as hate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 09:16 PM
111

Quora is filled with the same know-it-all men as Reddit, just that many of them have photos and use their real names.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/21 12:03 PM
103

Can you say “stalker”?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 07:07 PM
200

I would not want him around my kids, if I had any.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 07:05 PM
7

That’s what the block function is for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 02:15 AM
140

Why do people accept this? Don’t walk, run. This won’t get any better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 01:04 AM
36

I guess there was a happy ending to this, but two things: 1) You’re enraged that your soon-to-be ex-husband is a homophobe. Um, in the 15+ years you’ve known him it’s never come out? You never had an inkling that he was? Find that hard to believe. 2) Why were you paying his way? Like, the man doesn’t have a job?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:48 AM
43

Sex positivity will make you believe that this type of arrangement is empowering because it’s a woman taking the bull by the horns with “no strings attached” sex. I guess that works for a few people. If you truly don’t want a relationship, I guess. It seems to never end up the way intended and then one person is hurt because they caught feelings that aren’t reciprocated. I don’t know why anybody would voluntarily do that to themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:39 AM
19

They need to stop fooling themselves.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/21 12:34 AM
589

Play stupid games, win stupid prizes. You are absolutely playing games when you manufacture manipulation tactics to pressure or trap somebody into doing something they’re unsure about. What’s funny is that this is exactly the kind of communication that they frequently accuse us of.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/21 02:38 PM
4

There’s a difference in protecting confidential/private information (like, details about your sex life, possible childhood abuse and trauma of you suffered) and keeping what call I dirty little secrets (that he’s married, that he’s still living with an ex, that he’s in court for failure to pay child support.) I think some of this stems from the fact that women are constantly gaslighted and second guessed even when they’re right, so admitting that there is shadiness or dishonorable behavior on pa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 02:30 PM
2

All of the posts are about the pettiness, alleged cattiness, and nature of women who judge other women. Gosh, I can’t figured out where they may have learned…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 12:51 PM
1

Like with racism, there is no reverse racism. With misogyny and toxic masculinity, there is no “toxic femininity.” All of the behaviors described in the proceeding posts are side effects of internalized misogyny. For example, tearing other girls and women down for things like looks is based in patriarchy, not just arbitrary. Women are taught that we must be attractive to be taken seriously and thus that we must compete with each other to get ahead. The irony here is that there are dozens of wome…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/21 12:49 PM
9

Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 04:34 PM
136

I don’t think this has anything to do with mental illness. This is actually a sentiment that I hear a lot. It’s expected that BW date, marry, and have kids with BM but the same expectation of loyalty is not bestowed upon BM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 04:20 PM
19

Was this written in general or is this a personal poem for her?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 04:16 PM
15

I apologize for mislabeling you as a WW before, by the way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 04:08 PM
0

My bad. I wrongly assumed from her avatar that she was a WW saying this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 12:07 PM
29

Whenever it’s a matter of “Men’s Issues,” we’re the only one who have to hear about it. They would never and will never go to other men with their bullshit despite the fact that men are the only ones who can remedy it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 03:18 AM
31

Notice these are never concerns of theirs unless women bring up our concerns.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/21 03:15 AM
-13

No shade, I ask because most of the WW on Reddit love to perpetuate anti-Blackness.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 10:30 PM
-19

Are you a BW or a WW perpetrating the usual anti-Blackness?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 10:28 PM
18

And she calls herself a radfem. 😫
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 05:41 PM
45

Mothers should absolutely call their sons out on their shit, but at the end of the day this is a problem men are going to have to solve. The issue is that there’s no incentive to fix their shitty misogynist behavior because it benefits them not to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 05:36 PM
27

This thread is just…a dumpster fire.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 05:33 PM
32

So, your mindset is to pal around with people who don’t see women as human or see us as inferior in hopes that they will see you as human. Weird flex. You talk about things being solely men’s responsibility to fix what they created yet here you are putting in your time and energy begging Conservative White men to not treat us like trash. The only way that people change is when there are negative consequences that affect them. Having beers with a misogynist trying to change his mind ain’t it. If …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 05:15 PM
32

You call yourself a radfem but are receptive to “hearing out” a Conservative man blame the consequences of men’s behavior – and only their actions – on woman. Ain’t nothing radical about that. You’re a run of the mill libfem.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 04:44 PM
25

But just as many, if not more, are just your average White man next door. That’s the issue. That’s how Trump got elected and how so many misogynistic legislatures are passed. Let’s stop pretending all sexist POS are just these lost burnouts in mom’s basement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 04:41 PM
0

No, it’s just that you’re on the outside looking in. Men are like this regardless of race, though White men take the cake. Edit: My apologies. Ok-Neighborhood is Black. I wrongly assumed from the avatar that she was a White woman making a racist remark.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 04:38 PM
138

A Conservative man is not a “good” man. They’re why we’re in this shit to begin with. I don’t fuck with Conservatives.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/21 04:36 PM
19

As opposed to males in general?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/21 03:46 PM
160

It’s beyond my understanding how so many people consider marriage a huge commitment, yet not having children. You can get it annulled or get a divorce. You can’t “cancel” a human being once they are here. Moreover, why would you want to bring a child into such a flaky arrangement?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 01:18 AM
17

The thing is, regardless of what a lot of women say about wanting no strings sex, it hardly ever works out like that. They often catch feelings and wind up disappointed when the guy doesn’t want anything serious. Was he lying or misleading you in some way? What part of, “I’m not looking for commitment, I’m just DTF” is difficult to understand?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 11:44 PM
7

You’d be surprised. Not all people in social services and public service are benevolent people. I’ve met some of the most disgusting people who are social workers or oversee housing assistance programs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:32 PM
37

I’ve also been on the other side working with noncustodial fathers who make minimum wage but get heavily garnished because of how much child support they owe. I don’t feel any sympathy. Some will just work off the books so they don’t have to pay. One of my male clients lost a job as an MTA (NYC’s transportation agency) bus driver probably making $70K+ because his driver license was revoked for non-payment of child support. Really, dude? You could have worked your way up and been making 6-figures…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:29 PM
5

To be fair, it really depends. If you go into a field like social services and work for a non-profit, you may only earn $60K as a director (yes, even in NYC.) While $50K isn’t a lot, it goes far in many places. I’m not going to judge somebody because they wanted to make a difference by doing social work or homeless outreach or teach in a public school and get paid a modest salary. This guy is a flaming asshole but it has nothing to do with his salary.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 08:13 PM
60

The thing is, unless the other parent is some kind of career felon, drug addict, or child abuser, it’s not so simple. Remember, despite the fact that a lot of these men don’t want to lift a finger to raise their own kids, they’re not going to so easily sign away their parental rights. When I worked in child welfare, a lot of fathers who really didn’t want much to do with their children refused to sign away rights simply so they could use their children as pawns to “get at” the mother. Some of it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 07:53 PM
10

I thought so too. Maybe they live in a low cost state or country, but $50K for a family of 3 would be very hard to live on where I live.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:17 PM
36

I almost feel like these Reddit scenarios have prepared me in real life to know what I’m going to hear next when it comes to these train wreck marriages. 10+ year age gap with an older man and the relationship is nearly always wrought with manipulation and abuse.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:16 PM
60

They see these young wives as prizes or trophies. They think that they are entitled to a barely legal woman. Meanwhile, most of their female peers want nothing to do with these men because they already know how immature and trash they are, and avoid at all costs. Most men who date much youngerwomen aren’t hot shit, women their own age just won’t put up with their BS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:14 PM
33

Well, I don’t know if it’s a generational thing, it’s just a not shit man thing. I’ve seen this scenario play out in similar ways with women of all ages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:11 PM
78

This reminds me of that rich guy a few weeks ago who made his fiancée or girlfriend work extra jobs to pay for an extravagant vacation and let her go hungry because she couldn’t afford to eat at all of the luxurious restaurants the family went to. If the fiancée/girlfriend has stayed, this would be her in a few years.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:10 PM
219

Meanwhile, most of these men grow up to be misogynists because they were raised by a single mother in poverty while their deadbeat dad gets a pass and then a congratulations for if and when he decides to swoop back into his children’s lives.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:08 PM
130

Child support usually means that that man will be forever tied to you. A lot of women go figure that if he’s not paying or playing a role in his children’s live, she doesn’t need to deal with him and can make a fresh break from him. She’s usually right. However, an abusive shit like him will probably eventually file for visitation or custody just to torpedo her even if he doesn’t want anything to do with his kids. I’ve seen this replay over and over again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:05 PM
36

I feel like this is a game where we take a red pen and circle all of the 🚩🚩🚩in this post. Let’s start with the age gap. 38 isn’t old (I’m 38), but it’s moving towards middle age. 24 is, in my opinion, an age where you are still engaged in self-discovery, getting your first major job, moving out on your own, dating, and experimenting. I know a lot of 24 year olds think that they know everything there is to know about adulthood – I did too at that age – but it’s so young. Who I was at 24 is drasti…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 06:00 PM
3

What the hell is this? I thought it was wadded up toilet paper.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/07/21 03:36 PM
692

Notice she says “partner,” not husband. I honestly don’t get how she can do this once, get stuck with all the housework and chores, plus holding down a job and raising a child…then do it twice more. Sounds like libido is the least of her problems.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 01:07 PM
2

I knew a girl who totaled not one, but 2 luxury cars within a 24 hour frame. Totaled the first? Daddy bought her another. I think they gave her a 3rd one a while later after her destroying the 2nd one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 03:04 PM
5

Not just wealthy, upper middle class as well. And I’m side-eyeing young folks who’ve never had to get an after school or summer job calling other people lazy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 03:01 PM
2

I think a lot of AITA posts are useful for helping people see that they're being gaslit. This is definitely true too. I see a lot of posts by girls and young women who ask if they’re assholes for simply asserting themselves. It’s sad to see so many women second-guessing themselves when they are clearly in the right because it’s inconvenient or hurts the pride of a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 02:59 PM
10

Because he can control her and belittle her, and build himself up by putting her down. This is so typical of LVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 02:53 PM
2

Wow, what a prize.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 02:51 PM
24

Well, if he knows she makes much less than he does, he should try to accommodate her by choosing less expensive restaurants and attractions to visit. If I’m making $250,000 and I know you’re making $12/hour at Popeyes, I’m not demanding that we go to a 5-star Michelin-rated restaurant with a $300 tasting menu. He’s not only a selfish, greedy person, he also has no sense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 02:46 PM
6

Ok, you beat me to it because I read this and was going to post here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 02:36 PM
22

This. When you have to put so much effort in from the jump (your effort of course, because he’s not making one), so many sacrifices and concessions, it doesn’t bode well for the future. You have to have a real list of must-haves and dealbreakers, and be willing to walk away, otherwise you’re not going to be happy. A man doesn’t respect you anymore if you are willing to sacrifice your principles to keep the peace and make them relationship work. You have too know when to walk away because it’s ne…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 05:14 PM
34

I was confused if this was the same woman at first. Then it came to the one about her wanting to travel and see the world, and him working 80 hours a week and being a homebody. That’s not going to work and she shouldn’t sacrifice. She’d have lived with regrets if she did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 05:08 PM
184

He clearly wanted her around but on his terms. One had nothing to do with the other. I’m always hearing these really off the wall excuses for why a guy can’t commit, can’t get engaged, can’t get married, can’t get divorced from him wife to be with his mistress, why he can’t move in…all I’m seeing are flimsy excuses. If he wants to be with you, he will, and it won’t be confusing, difficult, and full of excuses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 05:03 PM
26

Yeah, once I put that together, I’m like, this is way too much. The fact that she made not one but several posts asking for advice from strangers did it for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 05:00 PM
46

Yeah, once I put that together, I’m like, this is way too much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 05:00 PM
49

I was wondering if it was the same woman too and realized it probably was. From the outside and at that age, if they’re having all of those issues dating less than a year, it’s not going to work. His not willing to put a label on the relationship, her initiating the “what are we” conversations, waxing over and over about “how right” they are for each other, and his being wishy-washy. This sounded more like a teen or early 20s relationships than that of people on their early 30s, one of whom is l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 04:57 PM
14

I lived in a big city for a year and that taught me to be able to ignore people. When someone tries to sell me something in the street, I say a polite “no, thank you” once then ignore them and keep walking if they persist. Yeah, we do this not because we want to be rude or cold or unpleasant, we just don’t have time for the bullshit. As per the scenario about a man in a desolate or secluded place asking for help, this is precisely if you go to New York you’ll find a lot of us won’t even look up …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 10:17 PM
14

Yeah, it’s always prefaced as a question instead of a request or command. Even with other women now sometimes it feels weird to make a command or ask for something without turning it into a question. This is also because when we do make a request in the affirmative, we’re often told that we’re being too pushy or bossy. This is something that I’ve always had trouble with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/06/21 10:11 PM
105

There was one guy on the ChangeMyOpinion (whatever it’s called) whose username I recognized who went off on a rant about how feminists are actually misandrists because he’s invaded feminist/women-only spaces and wasn’t coddled. He made a comment about my being kicked out of AskFeminists, which leads me to believe he reported me to the mods, resulting in my ban (I dodged a bullet, if you ask me.) He deleted his posts after I called him out on it, so I guess the shoe fit. He admits to invading wom…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 12:32 PM
143

This doesn’t surprise me. Over the past few weeks I’ve noticed several groups discussing FDS in a very negative light, all of who appeared to be (no way to verify) men. It would not be shocking to think that a lot of the men who complain about us being shallow and calling us “female incels” are the same ones infiltrating this sub to make shit posts so that they can go back and say, “See! I told you about them!”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 12:23 PM
123

Having worked with domestic violence survivors years ago (and yes, financial abuse is abuse), I learned that a lot of men impregnate women to trap them. See those women with 6 kids like stair-steps? Could be by choice and wanting a big family or could be domestic violence. Most of the young women I worked with had children in close succession, sometimes pregnant weeks after giving birth (obviously her healing after the trauma of childbirth was of no concern to the men.)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 09:39 PM
510

It’s not going to get better. She’s struggling and she’s having his baby and there’s no ring. Girl, what are you thinking? She’ll be a single mother within the next year or so. I’m married but childfree and I agree with you about women having to put our careers on the shelf and make sacrifices. No, thanks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 06:54 PM
8

Notice that people never ask these questions of men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 02:58 PM
5

True. I don’t think a question like this even deserves an answer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 02:58 PM
2

I hated this when I was single. Strangely (or maybe not so strangely), a lot of guys use this as a pick up line. There were few quicker ways to alienate me and make me feel like there was something wrong with me than asking this question. It’s like run like hell when I heard it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 02:57 PM
24

I feel sorry for women like this. Sadly, it’s not only women who had children as teens/early 20s or single mothers. I know a lot of women whose sole identity is “mommy,” and who have given up all of their hopes, dreams, and aspirations for their kids/husbands or BFs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 10:09 PM
16

Preach. Was having a discussion about this last night (not specifically about gender inequality.) It seems a lot of people are willing to make a deal with the devil of that means that get elevated status. Giving up your humanity never ends in equality, and any status or privilege you enjoy is conditional.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 10:05 PM
20

During the Great Recession of 2008-2009 I was in my mid-20s. I was essentially called a gold digger because one of my non-negotiables was that any guy I date have a full-time job. I was told I was expecting too much and told to consider unemployed men if I wanted to find someone. Are you out of your mind?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 09:34 PM
14

I used to spend a lot of time reading magazines and books about how to meet “the one,” how to attract guys, what to do/not do. Then it dawned on me that I’d wasted a lot of time and that if somebody was going to want a relationship with me, it was because he liked who I really was or else it would never last. Young women’s magazine bombard them with messages – often conflicting - about men’s likes and dislikes, what she should and shouldn’t wear to “get him,” and just general encouragement of in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 09:31 PM
46

She wasted her entire 20s. She needs to give him a deadline or be gone. I’m sure he’s convinced her that “marriage is just a paper” and “there’s no difference.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 10:23 PM
30

I hate when people in dead-end relationships like this bring kids into the equation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 10:22 PM
28

Not spending years and years without an engagement and wedding date. There are the ones who never will pop the question, but there are also the ones who propose and never intend to marry you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 10:21 PM
11

My sister’s friend bought a house with a boyfriend. They ended up lasting about a year after that. He bought her out after they broke up but we all said what a bad idea it was to begin with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 10:18 PM
7

Update: she deleted her post.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 07:33 PM
242

Forever. Sex offenders cannot be rehabilitated.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 07:11 PM
9

This is another line they use on us to get us to settle. This is a sad story and I really hope she comes to her senses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 06:33 PM
38

Oh, they know. With older men that date much younger women I always ask, if he’s such a catch, why aren’t women his own age dating him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 02:34 PM
68

Sure. His friends probably think he deserves a 20 year old a few years out of high school that he’d be better able to control. That’s all this really is. The gaslighting comments are a way to control or manipulate her. Now regardless of what she felt or thought before, she’s this evil, gold digging woman who’s going to take his money and uproot him. He needs new friends and she needs a new boyfriend. I’d feel sick if I knew she gave up all that for this guy who seems really unsure of himself and…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:47 PM
27

This is not going to end well. It almost guarantees a divorce. Major differences in salary, education, and class exacerbate any issues that are already there. I hope the hell she sees the light.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:44 PM
30

He’s surrounded himself with LVM and pick mes. What does that say for him? She’s only 32. Time to move on. She can find somebody much better that doesn’t feel so difficult and she won’t have to sacrifice so much. Marriages where there’s that much of a disparity between education and class don’t tend to last.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:17 PM
111

He’s surrounded himself with LVM and pick mes. What does that say for him? She’s only 32. Time to move on. She can find somebody much better that doesn’t feel so difficult and she won’t have to sacrifice so much. Marriages where there’s that much of a disparity between education and class don’t tend to last.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:17 PM
75

In it for the money? Looking to steal his pension? They’re really reaching. If she’s taking a $75,000 annual pay cut, she likely is making $150-200K and doesn’t need his money. I like how she has to be the one to sacrifice because then he’d have to start at the bottom. Isn’t that what she’s essentially doing? I’d never do that for a man. She’s downgrading her lifestyle substantially to be with this man. What is he bringing the relationship?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 12:11 PM
34

I think seeing and identifying the trash, misogynistic behavior in male friends and relatives is really key to seeing toxic patterns and red flags in men, and being able to protect ourselves. Too many women are still at the point that they’re looking the other way or making excuses for these not shit men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 02:54 AM
1

What is Red Pill? Is is literally a group of anti-feminists?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 01:28 AM
3

Feminism is conditional for that sub, apparently. It’s good so long as you don’t bruise the feelings of the men in the room. It’s so sad that the libfems in there don’t realize how gaslighted they are and that it’s perfectly normal to feel animosity towards the people who are oppressing and victimizing us. I realized soon after I joined that sub that it was heavily tone policed but stuck around to observe for a while.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:53 PM
3

I must have been 4 or 5. 😞
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:40 PM
8

I was functionally single for ~8 years. It was really hard at first but then I realized the alternative was that yes, I could find a boyfriend if I wanted something half-assed. I have friends well into their 40s and early 50s who are single for this reason. I had other friends who are scared of being alone who are perpetually with men who cheat on them, use them for money, abuse them, etc. It’s much better to be alone and do things on your terms than to be weighed down with some manboy who can’t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:39 PM
5

Sounds like she needs a kitten or puppy, not a boyfriend. Much cheaper, easier, and they don’t come at you with BS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:32 PM
11

I can’t believe the amount of women in their 30s and older who’ve never had an orgasm during sex. Most men are absolutely not good in bed and have managed to go through life not knowing or caring because their GFs never spoke up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:30 PM
6

And yet, here I am. No man who was ever intimidated by me or turned off by “these ideas” was ever worthwhile. They’re still standing where I left them being mediocre.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:20 PM
7

Congrats!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 03:18 PM
5

It’s almost like the problem here is you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 06:14 AM
136

Right. We don’t have the luxury to stick around and find out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 04:28 PM
2

Women owe men NOTHING. Not an explanation, not emotional labor, nothing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 03:11 PM
24

Sadly, there are a lot of boys and men who truly believe they’re doing a woman a favor by calling out to her about her ass/breasts/hips/general looks. I also realized that they wouldn’t do this if it didn’t sometimes work. I’ve seen a guy at a bus stop cat call a girl about how big her ass was and she actually turned around, walked back, and talked to him. She ended up giving him her #. This was like 17 years ago near Yankee Stadium. I was surprised.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:27 PM
34

I definitely believe some of them do this precisely to intimidate us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:23 PM
19

I could see this. I met a guy in a subway station years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:22 PM
48

I guess it would be much more likely in a place like here in NYC. I’ve actually seen a scrote calling out to a girl about her ass once and to my shock, she turned around and gave him her #. I almost fell down in shock. I thought I’d seen everything. Guys like him are precisely why I’ve never engaged with men on the street.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 03:21 PM
62

A lot of feminists have pushed this idea that “sex work is work” and we should just embrace it. While I do believe in decriminalization and unionizing for sex workers, I don’t think it should ever be peddled as a career choice. An overwhelming proportion of sex workers have addiction to substances and are rape/sexual molestation/abuse survivors. I guess it’s possible that some women enjoy this work but I have a hard time believing most would do it if presented with better choices (stable housing…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 12:20 PM
2

Not only in the US. I guess the point is that this started off as a friend and we weren’t on a date per se.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/05/21 12:20 AM
38

Right. But then when a woman speaks on it, it’s, “Why didn’t she say so sooner?”, “He’s such a nice guy, I can’t imagine him doing this,” “What did you do to provoke him?” kinda shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 10:39 PM
60

They do this in the workplace too. I’ve never met a male boss yet who didn’t build his career off of women’s work while mistreating them and not wanting to do any of the heavy lifting himself. Male “leaders.”
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 09:08 PM
61

I’m so seeing so many educated women with decent jobs who have these guys who call themselves artists or musicians or whatever the term du jour is. They pay for almost everything, the dude makes it clear from day one that he isn’t trying to be in a committed relationship. They have sex with a guy on the first date, if you could even call it a date. I don’t get it. Is being alone worse than being with somebody who sees you as a commodity or doesn’t value at all as a person? What are they getting …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 08:53 PM
95

A lot of these same dudes set up these cheap dates because they’re juggling multiple women. What’d he say after you told him that?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 08:49 PM
109

This is an interesting take. I’m not sure if I’m 100% on board, but many of the points resonate. It’s kind of like women from past generations didn’t have much of a choice but to marry, have children, and tend house. Now, on the surface, women have more choices and options but must expect less in return under the guise of being seen as “equal.” You know what? Nix that – I mostly agree here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 08:43 PM
6

It’s probably because the next woman challenges him. He’s not marrying somebody he doesn’t respect. These women who wait 10, 15 years for men to propose lack self-respect and self-esteem. The men make them think that they expect too much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 06:22 PM
4

It’s that “low maintenance” for me. Low maintenance = somebody who is ok with giving until they’re drained, has low self-esteem, and doesn’t ask anything of the other person. Women/girls need to get it out of their heads that they need to put aside all of their needs, wants, and goals to keep a man. GTFOH
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 06:18 PM
15

No lies told.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:31 PM
19

My friend from work kissed me and 6 months later I had an engagement ring, and 10 months after that, a wedding ring. This dude has no intentions of making things permanent.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:29 PM
15

I know a couple like that. He was in college and she was a 1st year grad student. They’ve been together ~30 years. He’s convinced her that loving together is the same as marriage. Poor thing. She probably still has hoped at 50+ that he’ll change and tie the knot.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:27 PM
29

Pragmatic means realistic. Pragmatic she is not or else she’d have been done with him 10+ years ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:24 PM
22

Truth. This woman is a place saver until he finds his wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:22 PM
3

True story: I started a new job 4 years ago. Within the first month, I met a male colleague who would soon be transferred to my location and whom I’d be working closely with and become friends with. After a few months of having him around, I started getting real feelings for him. I’ve been burnt – a lot – so I was very reluctant to reveal myself. After some coaxing from friends, I did. He decided that a relationship was something he didn’t want and just wanted to remain friends. I was crushed. F…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:17 PM
24

True story: I started a new job 4 years ago. Within the first month, I met a male colleague who would soon be transferred to my location and whom I’d be working closely with and become friends with. After a few months of having him around, I started getting real feelings for him. I’ve been burnt – a lot – so I was very reluctant to reveal myself. After some coaxing from friends, I did. He decided that a relationship was something he didn’t want and just wanted to remain friends. I was crushed. F…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:17 PM
15

Bachelor pad, man cave, clubhouse…what’s the female equivalent? God forbid a single woman does something to please herself and only herself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 11:00 PM
21

Was just discussing this before. Cons greatly outweigh the pros. I’m nobody to judge, but I can’t comprehend why so many progressive women are so pro-sex work. Even if you choose to do it in your own volition and not out of complete desperation, it comes with so many risks. Most sex workers are eventually raped or sexually assaulted, many are stiffed by their johns or have their wages robbed, they usually have a pimp whom they have to give a big cut of their pay to and who is often manipulative …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 02:30 AM
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