| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 2 | Social question on wanting to start over again newI completely understand where you are coming from. I think uprooting your entire life for a relationship is a bit much. There are other ways to cope with what you’re going through. Most of the comments have already hit on that. Therapy, a new hobby, visiting friends or traveling to a new location. If your situation is stable and you have access to your children, stay. Focus on yourself, live a life that brings you peace, get comfortable with those uncomfortable places/thoughts, and you’ll find s… | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/03/23 10:04 PM |
| 1 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.Nah, I’m a private person. | /r/Divorce_Men | 16/03/23 02:24 PM |
| 1 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.Thanks for the assistance, I am well aware that some people just won’t provide a decent story or bit of advice here on Reddit. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/03/23 06:34 PM |
| 2 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.I see what you’re saying and I have practiced that. Not ALL of my time with my children is consumed with my girlfriend and her child. My ex wife has a boyfriend of her own, that should give some sort of indication that she’s moved on as well. Don’t you think? | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/03/23 05:34 PM |
| 3 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.I’ve been to a few third world countries, seen it with my own two eyes. You’re right. It’s bothersome because this is completely avoidable. She has a boyfriend of her own, I’m not freaking out thinking my role is being replaced as Dad. It’s part of this process. I knew she’d move on, but I also know who I am to my children. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/03/23 05:13 PM |
| 2 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.There’s a huge difference in being a mature adult and being bitter and immature. She’s in her late 30s telling a child to tell his grandmother to shut up because the laugh is annoying. The correlation in me having a girlfriend and her vile behavior isn’t there. Not sure what kind of point you’re trying to make. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/03/23 05:10 PM |
| 3 | Frustrated and petrified for my children’s suffering.I’ve given all of my time to my children. I’ve sacrificed and put forth a tremendous amount of effort and will continue to do so. I don’t have to explain what all of that entails in great detail but I don’t neglect my children because I found a good person. I have taken and will continue to take the necessary steps to work through my own issues in a healthy manner. I don’t have to put my life on hold “to keep the peace” with a woman that can’t seem to move on in her own life. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/03/23 05:08 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I wish it was a different scenario for me | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 10:23 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.That’s crazy man, glad it all worked out for you. My ex wife also got arrested for DV. Texas courts still ruled in her favor. I was so confused | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 09:15 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.How long have you been dealing with this? How old are your children? | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 05:23 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I appreciate your response, but I feel like it is one sided. I am truly sorry you are going through a rough time, it sucks. I just refuse to correlate one bad woman and one bad situation to them all. The woman I’m currently dating is phenomenal. I do my best to take life one day at a time and this relationship has been built in both emotions and logic. I’m not on here advocating to have a baby with her this very second, I just want some reassurance that the idea of a child together, raised in a … | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 04:18 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I’m going to send you a DM, please open it! | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 04:08 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.They already get enough of my money | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 06:10 AM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.Thanks for the kind words. I’ll never give up. Just a low low right now. Been in my head about all of it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/23 02:11 AM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I do agree that she is intelligent enough to pause my anxiousness. She understands my children come first, they always have. Having another child is no rush for me. I just wanted to be on the same page in terms of having another kid is something we both desire, just when the timing is correct. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 11:00 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.That’s easy to type out. Financially it is not feasible. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 10:59 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.The current situation right now isn’t ideal to have a child, life is busy. The topic of having a child together has come up and her immediate response was “not right now” she’s expressed interest in having a child when the time is right. It was a broad initial conversation. Both logic and emotions would be utilized when it is time to revisit in a year or two | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 09:29 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I’m in the process of trying to get closer. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 09:17 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I’m active duty. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 09:04 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I completely understand the “no guarantee” aspect to my second marriage being better or having kids and that relationship being better. Having kids and getting married have been very broad conversations, I want life to play out the way it is supposed to. I’m never going to give up on my children, I’ll keep fighting and one day I know I’ll have that relationship I’ve wanted. Just the thought of “healthy” makes me crave those things life has the ability to offer. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 09:03 PM |
| 1 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.How old is your kid(s)? Do you have any other kids from a new relationship? | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 08:24 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.Are you going through a similar situation? | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 07:44 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.It wouldn’t stop me from fighting for my children in the slightest. But like the previous post about having a higher purpose.. it would make me feel complete in some capacity because I’m able to be the father and husband I’ve always wanted to be. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 07:32 PM |
| 2 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.I think the disconnection does play a role in my desire to have another child in a new relationship. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 07:24 PM |
| 4 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.10,8,6 | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 07:10 PM |
| 3 | Unable to be the father you desperately want to be.Thank you for taking the time to type that up. That really meant a lot to me. What’s your purpose? How did you figure yours out? | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/23 06:47 PM |
| 8 | Any positive stories here?The ideas you have in your mind right now is what some would call a “pipe dream” I divorced at the end of 2021, 2022 was filled with nothing but animosity, anger, disrespect. It got so bad she was arrested for assault. I had the same pipe dreams you have right now. The best thing you can do is let all of that go, endure the pain, work out, see a therapist, be there for your children the best/most you can be, everything else will fall in line. Keep it about your child(ren) and yourself. The rest … | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/01/23 03:13 AM |
| 2 | Disappointed with my dad being buddies with my STBXWAlways wanted one, never got it. Life goes on. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/12/22 09:11 PM |
| 2 | Disappointed with my dad being buddies with my STBXWI’m far from naive. My father and I have never been close. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/22 09:33 PM |
| 3 | Disappointed with my dad being buddies with my STBXWMy father testified against me in court when I fought for more custody for my children. He didn’t tell me he was going to be there, I had no idea he was in her corner. Shortly after that he moved up the street from her and is now a very active part in her life. I called him and told him that I forgive him and what he did really hurt me, he apologized. I have nothing left for him, I did it for closure and peace. Don’t hold onto the anger. Trust people to be who they truly are and you’ll be less u… | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/12/22 02:14 PM |
| 1 | She's keeping the kids from me on Christmas...Get as far away from the court as possible. Use them if you absolutely need to, but this little situation is a money pit and will surely cripple you over time. They don’t give a fuck about you or your kids. Talk to your ex wife (if possible) and try to come to some sort of mutual agreement. I promise you I’ve been where you are and it is not fun. | /r/Divorce_Men | 24/12/22 04:47 AM |
| 2 | What’s the right thing to do?Your wife? Are y’all getting a divorce? | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/22 05:52 PM |
| 2 | What’s the right thing to do?Thank you so much for sharing that article. I’ve made a great deal of mistakes within that first year, I regret them, but I’m learning as I go and I hope to move forward in this manner the article depicts | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/12/22 01:09 PM |
| 0 | What’s the right thing to do?Damn bruh, what is your back story? | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 11:15 PM |
| 1 | What’s the right thing to do?I am a bit hesitant because I am very unsure how she will respond. Or if I’ll even get a response. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 09:47 PM |
| 1 | What’s the right thing to do?I see where you’re coming from with your comments, I really do. I also believe in eating some shit in order for things to come full circle for my kids. I’ve recognized that I’ve already “lost” (child support, my home, full time father, etc) but if I can show small acts of kindness I’ll always know that I did my best and I tried to bring peace. Even if I get shit on, knowing I’m a good person is priceless for my children and I. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 09:45 PM |
| 1 | What’s the right thing to do?It’s more of a white flag. I’m not looking to accomplish anything or receive anything. Divorce gets ugly, we hit rock bottom, but why can’t things improve? I’m not looking to remarry her or get my foot in the door. I’m just trying to be nice and work towards an environment that my kids feel comfortable in. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 07:31 PM |
| 2 | What’s the right thing to do?I dropped charges. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 07:29 PM |
| 7 | What’s the right thing to do?Appreciate the response. I see no harm in it either. There are no photos of anyone else but our children having a good time. Sorry you’re dealing with that nonsense, it’s unfortunate that people can be that immature. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 04:14 PM |
| 1 | Ex wife and her new relationshipI really appreciate this response. Have your children met your new lady yet? | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 04:12 PM |
| 2 | do they ever change back?Fuck no snake | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/12/22 04:05 PM |
| 3 | Divorced then back together?I could never. As a man, she disrespected me so much that even if I wanted to I would feel as if I’m stooping to a complete level of low where I couldn’t obtain any level of self respect because I knew what I was going back to | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/11/22 01:02 AM |
| 5 | Divorced then back together?“How” the divorce played out I believe shows people’s true colors. I’ve witnessed some very grimey, back stabbing behavior | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/11/22 12:55 AM |
| 2 | Divorced then back together?Here for you buddy | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/11/22 12:54 AM |
| 7 | Divorced then back together?Man, that’s insane. I truly wonder what makes one go back to that. My divorce got really ugly, really fast. I’ve taken the healing process seriously after making a few big mistakes. Even through therapy and journaling do I find myself still missing those “good memories” I feel like I need more closure. It’s not something I ever wanted, but knew it needed to happen to unlock a better version of myself. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/11/22 02:35 PM |
| 2 | Friendly reminder: Have your own ThanksgivingAmen. Great life perspective brotha. Keep on keep in’ on. | /r/Divorce_Men | 25/11/22 02:25 PM |
| 2 | Delusional thinking?Appreciate that man, I really do | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:22 PM |
| 1 | Delusional thinking?The whole situation/divorce still has me a bit fucked up, honestly. I really do miss my family and I deal with guilt for filing and following through. I just could t continue to live like that. I felt like a prisoner in my own home. Zero peace and zero respect. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:07 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?She was actually arrested for assault. Posted bail and is under a no contact order towards me. If I offered counseling or a couple books I don’t think the gesture would be received very well. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:06 PM |
| 2 | Delusional thinking?If you’re ever in Texas, let’s do it! | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:03 PM |
| 4 | Delusional thinking?Nah you didn’t come off as harsh. I posted this because I genuinely want to know if I’m going to far with this. It’s all new to me and the different perspectives are very interesting to read. I can say I do feel differently about it now. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:02 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?I agree with this, respectable for sure | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:00 PM |
| 1 | Delusional thinking?I appreciate the response, really changes my perspective on this entire situation. Thanks a lot for that man! | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 07:00 PM |
| 4 | Delusional thinking?You’re absolutely right, I do appreciate the response. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 05:18 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?Damn, man. I’m sorry to hear that. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 05:00 PM |
| 2 | Delusional thinking?I’m in a very similar situation as you, just no girlfriend. I can see where I am delusional, guess it’s just wishful thinking. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 04:59 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?They are young 9,7,5. We don’t get along, she for some reason just cannot stop being bitter and angry towards me. I have tried countless times to be as cordial as possible. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 04:57 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?Any books you recommend? | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 02:50 PM |
| 1 | Delusional thinking?I appreciate your feedback and am glad you see where I’m coming from. I understand and am fully aware of expectation management from others | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 02:35 PM |
| 2 | Delusional thinking?Good idea! | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 02:33 PM |
| 2 | Delusional thinking?Yeah man, I appreciate the response. There is no right answer to this, but I was curious if my thought process behind this may have been skewed or I’m asking for too much. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 12:49 PM |
| -8 | Delusional thinking?If he’s around my children I feel like there is a “need to know”. I’m not looking to be best friends with the guy. Just simple conversation. Just shows maturity to me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 12:13 PM |
| 3 | Delusional thinking?Just out of curiosity, why not? My thought process behind it is 1) it just seems like a common courtesy. 2) I’m not trying to be best friends with this person, but if they are in my children’s lives, a simple conversation about who he is and who I am seems like the mature thing to do. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 12:12 PM |
| 6 | Delusional thinking?I’m in the same boat man. Being the bigger person does get fucking exhausting though. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 12:10 PM |
| -11 | Delusional thinking?I would. It’s the right thing to do. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/11/22 12:10 PM |
| 2 | going to do it.You’re the dude whose wife is out partying with no ring? | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/10/22 01:17 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingMy anniversary is coming up this week | /r/Divorce_Men | 29/10/22 01:01 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingCould not fix it through therapy? | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/10/22 12:45 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingWhy’d you divorce her? | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/10/22 12:10 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingWhat’s your reason why? | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 11:50 PM |
| 1 | ReminiscingI really love this response, thank you | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 05:01 PM |
| 1 | ReminiscingThanks for the advice man. I’ve been in therapy and it has helped me in a major way. | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 12:38 PM |
| 1 | ReminiscingI’m sorry to hear that bro. Even if it is over reddit, I’m here for you man. I hope you can get through this in a healthy manner | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 12:37 PM |
| 1 | ReminiscingWhat caused your divorce, if you don’t mind me asking | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 11:30 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingYeah man, I understand that. My situation is one where I have thought about the opportunity to reconcile, but it has just gone too far for that and it is really painful. She got arrested, the kids have seen too much, the amount of money spent, etc | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 10:24 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingYou’re completely unable to co parent? | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 02:56 AM |
| 2 | Reminiscing🫶 | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 01:58 AM |
| 1 | ReminiscingVery true, thank you | /r/Divorce_Men | 27/10/22 01:58 AM |
| 4 | ReminiscingI really appreciate that man. We’re in this fight together. The community of men going through these situations is one hell of a community. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 07:57 PM |
| 1 | ReminiscingAny kids between the two of y’all? | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 03:32 PM |
| 2 | ReminiscingI’d just say be careful with that. When you reap souls like that it could be extremely detrimental to any sort of long term relationship down the line. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 03:31 PM |
| 13 | ReminiscingI feel crazy because of the way she treated me. I just have this overwhelming feeling to express my thoughts and emotions to her today. I’m not going to do that, but the temptation is very real. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 02:33 PM |
| 3 | ReminiscingI agree. I’ve been big on that app audible, been listening to a lot of great books this year. The gym and running have always been an outlet for me. I appreciate you responding to this post. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 02:31 PM |
| 3 | ReminiscingI can relate completely to those feelings about the kids man, it’s extremely difficult. But I show up when it’s my time and I give them my all. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 02:26 PM |
| 3 | ReminiscingYeah man, I’m working through therapy and the gym has always been a part of my life. I would consider myself healthy in terms of dealing with my emotions and trauma. I’m not turning to anything negative. Just one of those days | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 02:25 PM |
| 11 | ReminiscingWorking out has always been a part of my life. I’ve put myself out there with dating, but I’ve prioritized my children and myself before another female. If there’s someone for me, it’ll happen. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/10/22 02:24 PM |
| 4 | STBEXW is dumb.I wouldn’t get upset/angry about that. I would do everything I could to use it to my advantage and benefit from it. | /r/Divorce_Men | 28/06/22 02:13 AM |
| 2 | Ex wife is a narcissistTold me either a writ of mandamus or a child custody evaluation | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/06/22 12:29 AM |
| 1 | Ex wife is a narcissistWould y’all leave your girlfriend? Move out? Go to a hotel every other weekend? Forfeit time with your kids to live your own life? | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/06/22 10:28 PM |
| 4 | Ex wife is a narcissistI live with my girlfriend. The judge told me I’m not allowed at any of my kids extra-curricular events. And after I told her I live with my girlfriend how do I do the right thing and listen to this no contact order. She told me to figure it out. My girlfriend was trying to help my son calm down when we had to say goodbye to him one night. That’s the “distraction” | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/06/22 09:43 PM |
| 1 | Daughter’s Cell PhoneI’m already doing everything I can to fight for custody | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/06/22 12:11 AM |
| 2 | Daughter’s Cell PhoneThanks for the page advice man, going to do that now | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/06/22 12:07 AM |
| 2 | Ex wife arrested for assault bodily injury and assault bodily injury - married/cohabIt’s not just this incident specifically. I can prove that for months she is both verbally and emotionally abusive towards me and the children. Assault charges on top of that. I feel like I have a leg to stand on. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 12:01 PM |
| 2 | Ex wife arrested for assault bodily injury and assault bodily injury - married/cohabHow are they struggling? I’m not sure I understand that question… they are struggling because I had to discuss the fact that their mother was arrested and went to jail for 24 hours. Yes, my girlfriend and I are both pressing charges. Restraining order, no. Protective order, yes. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 11:58 AM |
| 1 | Ex wife arrested for assault bodily injury and assault bodily injury - married/cohabThe only goal I have for my kids when I get them is to provide a home full of love, safety, and security. Thank you for the kind words man. I’ll gladly accept the manly hug. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 11:56 AM |
| 2 | Ex wife arrested for assault bodily injury and assault bodily injury - married/cohabI’m going to give those books a listen for sure! I really appreciate you sharing that information! | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 11:55 AM |
| 4 | Ex wife arrested for assault bodily injury and assault bodily injury - married/cohabNot yet, it’s been such a recent thing that I’ve just been trying to be there for them. They have spoken to the school counselor though via Google meet. I had a hearing today for illegal custody of the kids. I was ordered to return the kids to their mother until my time with them this summer. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 02:21 AM |
| 1 | I hate her, how can I forgive?You can’t bro. | /r/Divorce_Men | 20/05/22 02:12 AM |
| 1 | Unstable and custodyAppreciate that feedback. I should have worded my post s little better. I was just curious how much instability played a role into any type of custody dispute. | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/07/21 01:23 AM |
| 1 | Unstable and custodyHow do you recommend I record these phone interactions | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/07/21 12:15 AM |
| 1 | Unstable and custodyWhat's your recommendation on recording all interactions? A word document? | /r/Divorce_Men | 22/07/21 12:05 AM |
| 2 | Unstable and custodyDamn thanks for that bit of information. I thought the judge personally cared about everyone's case. You smart. | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/07/21 11:41 PM |
| 5 | Unstable and custody1) No, I did not cheat. She has told me that she slept with two guys in our bed. Blew it off the first time, but she recently brought it up again with some details about the situation. 2) I'm in Texas 3) I wouldn't say crazier than anyone else. Just A LOT of name calling, talks directly to my kids with lies and false accusations. (I had to leave for work and she told the kids I'm leaving for another woman) I've tried to explain that behavior like this is destructive but she typically hits me wit… | /r/Divorce_Men | 21/07/21 10:21 PM |
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