| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 319 | Textbook narcissistic abuse. Luckily, most people warned OP! | TRIGGER WARNING | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 07:45 AM |
| 212 | What's with the Insta trend where young women flex their old husbands? | NAH, SIS | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/21 01:27 PM |
| 165 | PickMe here, left another idiot. Was I right? | LESSON LEARNED | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 02:30 PM |
| 1 | Are we overestimating the importance men give to a proposal? | DISCUSSION | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/04/21 09:30 AM |
| 1 | A few green flags I noticed | GREEN FLAG 🟢 | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/05/21 12:17 PM |
| 1 | Lots of top answers point out groomers. Sometimes I see hope on Reddit | WHOLESOME CONTENT | Horror_Maize_6546 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/05/21 03:29 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 7 | Who’s watched Maid on Netflix.Totally, I had to take breaks, not even among episodes but even during a single one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/21 02:58 PM |
| 5 | Who’s watched Maid on Netflix.What can I say, it's extremely accurate. Almost anything depicted is like I experienced it myself. Great product in my opinion and I'd wish as many people as possible would watch it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/21 02:57 PM |
| 26 | They will always show up again, one way or anotherYep, all of my exes (all dumped by me) came back. Repeatedly, after a few months, and till many years later. And it's not like they have anything interesting to say really. What's their point? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/10/21 02:55 PM |
| 27 | quick and easy ways to vet: how to tell there is a mask in the first placeYou see small hints of something they're trying to conceal. For example, the way they text/talk. They may use complex vocabulary and such. I notice this one is used by men insecure about their physical appearance, they try to compensate with the impression of a brain. Also, it's easier to gaslight you with the word salads. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/21 01:46 PM |
| 6 | An Ex bf keeps looking at my LinkedIn profileHighschool ex is always seeing my stories and sometimes even replies. We're 30s now. And he's about to get married. And I don't even follow him back. These men, I can't even-- | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/09/21 08:59 AM |
| 12 | What's up with the dislike towards MBTI?I love MBTI but I've been already with two men using it a lot as you're saying here -- justifying poor behaviour. No thanks. I never used my type that way, I'm not even sharing it. EDIT men generally enjoy finding excuses for what they are/do (we know they're mostly raised that way and blah we don't need to dive into this). MBTI may be an excuse just as any other, that's it. If you meet somebody who states his type right-away, like in his social bio, or after a couple of chats with you, I'd say … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 09:57 AM |
| 86 | It screams LVM to me, but my friend argued that it's actually a HVM behaviour. What do y'all think?Where is he admitting anything, truly? Often men say "Sorry" or "Forgive me" mechanically without even understanding what they did wrong in the first place. And this only increases the chances they'll do the very same again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 09:53 AM |
| 388 | It screams LVM to me, but my friend argued that it's actually a HVM behaviour. What do y'all think?You put beautifully into words what I also thought: if you need to make a giant billboard with "PLEASE FORGIVE ME" written on it, maaan, I wonder WTF did you do to her. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 09:52 AM |
| 7 | A Self Healing Post - Understand why you may be attracted to certain men - or why the bond feels so strongLovely answer, thank you :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 09:14 AM |
| 12 | A Self Healing Post - Understand why you may be attracted to certain men - or why the bond feels so strongDon't know if anybody will read my comment, but, this is a post from the Holistic Psychologist: is she considered FDS? I feel like some of her believes wouldn't | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 08:47 AM |
| 4 | PickMe here, left another idiot. Was I right?I was truly shocked when I found out her age, and couldn't stop myself from asking him "A university student? Really??". Like, he looked like the most adult guy I ever been with so far. Respectable job position, nice house and everything. WTF do you find in common with a girl that recently exited her teenage years. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 11:40 AM |
| 16 | Guy Shows A Provider Mentality. Some Women are Like "Yes, DO It!" Other Comments Show a PickMe Deprived Mentality - Ladies, Learn to Embrace Being SpoiledSomeone who's not generous with either two is likely not generous with both. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 08:14 PM |
| 29 | Guy Shows A Provider Mentality. Some Women are Like "Yes, DO It!" Other Comments Show a PickMe Deprived Mentality - Ladies, Learn to Embrace Being SpoiledSo he's hot and rich and them be like "but I want love". Okay fine can I have him then? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 08:13 PM |
| 5 | PickMe here, left another idiot. Was I right?That's a good point, yes | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 07:33 PM |
| 65 | PickMe here, left another idiot. Was I right?At least when he talked about it to the therapist (a woman) he apparently received a disgusted glare in return. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 03:47 PM |
| 31 | PickMe here, left another idiot. Was I right?The ex with whom I'm friend with was literally my family when my real family basically abandoned me, so, I'm not sure I'd accept a man I've knew for a few months to tell me if I can or cannot have casual contact with him. I'm friend with his fiancée too and adore her because I think she's the right woman for him. I understand mine is a peculiar case, sure. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/09/21 03:02 PM |
| 14 | Times you need confort are good for vetting...Absolutely agree. I once finally cut myself out of a long-lasting crush on a guy after I opened up to him about a health-related issue (note: after he told me he would have always been there for me and blah, it would have been hard for me to open up otherwise) and he only answered "Uh, sounds bad". Then proceeded to never ever ask me again how I was doing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/08/21 02:16 PM |
| 15 | A HVM won’t be in contact with his exI have an ex, let's call him R., which I may say is quite a good friend. We both came from abusive families, and he was my actual home for a long time. Then, we broke up because we realized we had basically nothing in common but a tragic background, and we had to find partners who would fit our personalities. I still hope he will find the woman right for him, and he does the same for me. As an example: my latest ex was very toxic, and R. told me right away the guy did not look right for me at al… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/06/21 07:44 PM |
| 23 | "They're like brother and sister""He's single now, but when he has a girlfriend or wife, I'm more than happy to take a step back from the friendship. And if she'll accept me, I would love her to be my family & my people too." Just wanted to point out how sweet is this | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/06/21 09:16 AM |
| 6 | Always, ALWAYS check his phoneOh well, didn't take into account the sadistic side indeed | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/06/21 01:27 PM |
| 11 | Always, ALWAYS check his phoneI feel like the men who are willing to give you their passwords are, paradoxically, the worst ones. Don't have an explanation for that. I think they assume you are never going to check anyway given how chill they look about it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/06/21 07:21 AM |
| 5 | 🚩 RED FLAGS 🚩 Career edition 🤭😳 (psychopath edition 🥲🧛♂️)SW eng here, would say the same. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/06/21 07:15 AM |
| 6 | Ew. Nope! You'll always sink to their level. They will never rise to yours if this is how your "relationship" is.Also this sounds just controlling anyway. So, no healthy way to look at this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/05/21 12:04 PM |
| 5 | Yup. Especially how creepy most of the men giving out compliments areHahaha, why is this so spot on! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/05/21 07:44 AM |
| 2 | Justin BaldoniI bought his book about masculinity after hearing him at the Women of Impact podcast, I'm very curious. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/05/21 12:03 PM |
| 20 | Kick him out 2021: What do you refuse to stand for?When he justified his own bullying by saying "I'm not bullying you, it's just that you're traumatized by your family history". Ah yeah, bullying me + using my personal confessions against me for gaslighting? Byeee. EDIT the one before him instead was with me for over four years during college, then we moved in together and I started talking marriage. He was full of "maybes", "ifs" and "buts". I ain't wasting my twenties, if you don't want me for life just leave my house already. 👋🏼 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/05/21 11:37 AM |
| 25 | The FDS message is slowly getting through!Today I noticed a lot of good advices under a relationships subreddit and a scrote commenting "Lol a lot of comments here sound like FDS". He only got downvotes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/05/21 05:12 PM |
| 18 | Buying you things doesn’t make a man an HVMHe used the excuse that I was into games in my childhood and wanted me to have some sweet memories back. It didn't sound so bad, if we ignore the fact that he never tried to understand what I truly liked and cared about as the woman I am today, and that the gamer was "casually" him (yes, nerd NVM). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/21 12:03 PM |
| 99 | Buying you things doesn’t make a man an HVMYES, thank you! I cannot stress this enough. My ex used to shower me with expensive gifts I never asked for. Here's a list so you can get an idea of why this was bad: Very first present: waaay too early in our relationship, like, first month of dating. It was a perfume. Mind that I was never a woman into perfumes (my nose is sensitive and easily gets itchy), and he knew that. He wanted me to be one, AND bought me he personally liked to smell on me. And since I'm very honest, I did made him notic… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/05/21 07:55 AM |
| 5 | Patterns Of Thinking And Behavior Often Displayed By AbusersGirl if this isn't my ex. You put it perfectly. Nice job with this post. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/05/21 06:58 PM |
| 2 | What even is this logic???I've read the rules and I didn't see any about not sharing the title (not even the full title, btw) of a post. Many screenshots in this sub report the titles, too, and do not get removed by mods. If you are so concerned about such matters, anyway, there are many effective ways to tell a "newbie". Swearing nonsense in not one of them. Thanks to your rant, A) I learnt nothing new if not that there may be quite unpleasant users here, and B), the "risk of a ban" is still there, because you failed to… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/05/21 07:00 AM |
| 40 | Ghosted after not putting out on a dateDid he take "no" for an answer, though? Sure, he did not insist, but that would be rapey already. If his energy completely shifts after a No, to me it does not equal "Taking a no maturely". | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 03:06 PM |
| 6 | What even is this logic???Keeping standards high means swearing? Sorry then, I've missed that part. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 02:57 PM |
| 15 | What even is this logic???And even if this was true, what's the point of telling me with such an attitude anyway? I doubt it offended you personally the fact that I was trying to help another user that had a question. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 02:39 PM |
| 105 | What even is this logic???The top comments give me hope. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/05/21 11:01 AM |
| 14 | The Vetting Process: A List of Minimum QualificationsI'm 27. I don't know a single man that can master them all. Some a nice 70%, but like, tops. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/04/21 07:45 PM |
| 5 | The reasons behind the myth of short men having a “hard time” dating is other men, their own insecurities and how vicious they are to a taller woman who dares to show any interest.I don't think stating personal tastes should be considered a problem, only insulting would be. If a man can say he only dates girls with at least a cup C, you should be free to say you only date men above a certain height. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/04/21 09:47 AM |
| 23 | The reasons behind the myth of short men having a “hard time” dating is other men, their own insecurities and how vicious they are to a taller woman who dares to show any interest.My current partner, a person who seems pretty decent (albeit constant vetting) is fairly short for a man. Surprise surprise, he never had a single issue with dating (including women taller than him). Some men love to blame their relationship issues on things they cannot change, like height: so they don't have to work on something they could actually improve with some effort (character, personality, etc.). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 04:42 PM |
| 15 | Textbook narcissistic abuse. Luckily, most people warned OP!The fact that SO many people confirmed to have an ex that was exactly like this just confirms how entitlement is still normalized in our society. Which is why I was happy to see that 99% of the comments were supportive with OP instead of just gaslight her more. Small victories, I know | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 01:30 PM |
| 31 | Textbook narcissistic abuse. Luckily, most people warned OP!If you read the comments to the post, everybody had at least an ex like that. Big surprise. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/21 08:40 AM |
| 64 | Weird Red Flags?So you're telling me there are men who do not play this card? Never met a single one. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/21 08:51 PM |
| 3 | I also dumped him!Lol are you describing my ex? So many similarities. Good that you left 🎉🎉! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/04/21 06:49 AM |
| 3 | Bridgerton was a hot mess but I still binge watched it!Same, every scene that involved him I was like "Jee I hate this guy so much" | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/01/21 02:50 PM |
| 19 | Men with an impossibly long list of "preferences" don't actually require a potential girlfriend to meet every single one, they just want the opportunity to devalue any woman who might date them, and an excuse to always keep one foot out the door looking for someone betterIf that post linked there is not from a sociopath... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/10/20 09:31 AM |
| 6 | "I’m NOT into beautiful women ” - Men, Beauty and Power 💄My ex would claim looks did not matter, he was not necessarily into looks, and so on and so forth but then looks were the only thing he would compliment me about all the time. Or, he would brag with his friends about my looks, showing off my photos and such (even before telling them how I was as a person and such). Yeah man, sure you don't care about beautiful women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/20 09:24 AM |
| 2 | Setting you up to prove yourselfNo idea. I think they can find you through proximity though | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/10/20 11:38 AM |
| 5 | That’s right. Bye LVM!This is heartwarming, loved it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:32 AM |
| 2 | Narcissists and Porn UseMy narcissistic ex sometimes wanted me to watch porn with him/put on porn while we were doing sex. Never understood it, really. Maybe he wanted me to imitate the video? Well, the technique failed miserably, I was just in total discomfort & trying to ignore it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:31 AM |
| 10 | Setting you up to prove yourselfWhat do you bring to the table? My own chair. You killed me | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:29 AM |
| 5 | Setting you up to prove yourselfAre you real? Are you a fake profile? A guy approached me on Telegram out of the blue exactly like this. It sounded so dumb. I mean, you are the one who somehow found my profile, it's not like I'm out there blatantly trying to catch some prey. Blocked him right-away | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:28 AM |
| 10 | I haven’t used OLD in forever, and this was literally my first experience. “I’m an empath so I feel things more than you” is a massive red flag. What I hear is “I can be as insensitive to you as I please, but don’t you DARE have feelings around me because only my feefees are important”.Guaranteed. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:23 AM |
| 19 | I haven’t used OLD in forever, and this was literally my first experience. “I’m an empath so I feel things more than you” is a massive red flag. What I hear is “I can be as insensitive to you as I please, but don’t you DARE have feelings around me because only my feefees are important”.When women use that word to describe themselves, I just think they have issues where they attract narcs and predators and you are not wrong indeed | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:23 AM |
| 16 | I haven’t used OLD in forever, and this was literally my first experience. “I’m an empath so I feel things more than you” is a massive red flag. What I hear is “I can be as insensitive to you as I please, but don’t you DARE have feelings around me because only my feefees are important”.People (especially men) who claim "I am an empath" out loud probably are the furthest from an empath you will meet. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/10/20 09:22 AM |
| 6 | How to Vet STEM MenSince I started working closely with another woman, my feelings about my work completely changed. We build each other up, we are empathetic, and never condescending. A combination which never existed with male colleagues | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/10/20 02:21 PM |
| 15 | How to Vet STEM MenLoved your reply to them | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 09:44 PM |
| 32 | How to Vet STEM MenPhD in CS here, can't upvote you enough | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 09:41 PM |
| 1 | Real HVM shitMusk literally admitted he is unable to be alone. HUGE red flag already | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 09:59 AM |
| 2 | Real HVM shitAgree. My ex was a toxic partner, most likely a narcissistic one. He would buy me gifts, even expensive ones. But: - typically things he liked, hence, perfumes he wanted to smell on me, or, other gifts he could use as well - typically expecting pretty much the same (if not more) in return | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/10/20 09:57 AM |
| 2 | A (male) professor admitted he never had any intention of learning his wife's first tongueWell, my ex did try to learn mine, but it's not like he was a good guy anyway | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/10/20 05:36 PM |
| 3 | My boyfriend destroyed my 7 year old Bonsai treeWTF? Destroying property IS abuse. You have the right to be enraged and not wanting to forgive him. Honestly, you don't know what he could be able to do in the future. He has been with you for 4 years and still he thinks it is fine to do something like that and laugh about that? Really, WTF. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 08:02 PM |
| 7 | When the LVM reveal their true face. Is this a reminder not to trust anyone? How can we build a life with someone who we believe to be HV when literally anyone could be lying to us for years? It’s really scary to hear about such stories.Something in me just knew we weren't meant to be together but I chose to date him anyway. This. Same here. But I endured for over one full year, and, "at least", he was not physically violent. I just knew something was off since the very start. I couldn't point out what precisely. Some orange flags here and there I guess. With time they turned out completely red and I finally realized and walked away. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 04:29 PM |
| 1 | The "perfect" relationship 🤮Thats all they will ever do. I have dated plenty of gamers and the rest of the relationship either doesn't happen or is work for the gaming bf. This. I had an ex that overall wasn't a bad person, but jee, every single night he was online to play with his friends, and they were even loud (we lived together). We barely did anything just ourselves and, if we did, he looked utterly bored. And what about splitting the chores? Hell no woman, are you crazy. I asked him to leave the house after so many … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 10:29 AM |
| 1 | The "perfect" relationship 🤮HE "LETS" HER PLAY VIDEOGAMES WITH HIM Ain't them generous. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/10/20 10:27 AM |
| 42 | How we handle LVMThis always confused me. I too can consider other men attractive yet I don't remember ever stating it openly in front of my boyfriends. What would be the point? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/10/20 08:47 AM |
| 21 | please take the time to watch this 1 minute video on reactive abuse.My narcissistic ex made me reach this point after a whole year of relationship. Before that he was nothing like an abuser. They drag you in their spider web with a nice mask and once you're caught the mask falls down. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/20 08:27 AM |
| 2 | Omg Sis, you are so lucky! 🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 #blessedhunI hope that the day I'll feel like I need the guidance of a man who can't even literally put back towels will never arrive. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 09:01 AM |
| 5 | "you seem really sweet"My narcissistic/abusive ex would exactly call me sweet before dating. And while in the relationship he would often call me his angel. The.Cringe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/10/20 06:39 AM |
| 4 | Academic and smug type of LVMHey is this my ex | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 11:36 AM |
| 1 | How to date men less smart than youSecond this 100%. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 10:19 AM |
| 2 | How to date men less smart than youSmart AND humble men do exist. But usually they're taken :)) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 05:39 AM |
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter