| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 901 | What I've learned from dating a HVW | MINDSET SHIFT | Huntscunt | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/21 07:44 PM |
| 84 | You know who is ok? The women in this subreddit | COCKHOLM SYNDROME | Huntscunt | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 22/12/20 05:24 PM |
| 61 | Just a Thank You | FDS SUCCESS! | Huntscunt | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 05:09 PM |
| 19 | HVM and stds | SEEKING ADVICE | Huntscunt | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 04:12 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 36 | Why Does He Do That? - A StudyI had to work with a narcissist and it literally traumatized me. Nothing was ever his fault, even when you would have in writing what you needed him to do and he wouldn't do it. Impossible to work with and when you even hinted at calling him out, he would get so angry and rally ppl around him with lies. When we finally fired him, he went scorched earth and told everyone I accused him of sexual harassment, which I, of course, never did. Just of basic old sexism that was well documented. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/04/22 06:54 PM |
| 24 | Vetting Professional Men: Six Things to Keep in MindAs someone who has been on both sides as professor and admin, watch how he treats admins, nurses, etc. Basically all the people that make his job possible. If he treats them as lesser, he will treat you as lesser because he will view you as just another support for his career. If he values them as full members of the team, respects what they do, values their time and expertise, chances are he will value what you bring to the relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/04/22 03:32 AM |
| 40 | This Post Will Probably Offend You.I used to be a liberal feminist but I realize the folly in that now. Radical feminism is the only way we are ever going to be free from patriarchal violence. Kant, huge misogynist that he was, argued that marriage protected women because it forced men to be accountable financially and as protectors of any off spring produced. The problem with the system was women were still at the mercy of individual men as they needed marriage financially and things like marital rape were legal. While thankfull… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/04/22 10:40 PM |
| 9 | Hot Take: Marvel/DC Superhero culture is doing to men and boys what Disney did to women and girlsThat's why I liked it so much. I watched after getting out of my abusive relationship, and it was really cathartic. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/22 01:46 PM |
| 75 | Eye opening vacationMy current partner and I have traveled twice together so far, including one international, and we didn't argue at all. It was such a relief because I feel like traveling is one of those times when ppl show who they really are. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/22 03:55 AM |
| 53 | Hot Take: Marvel/DC Superhero culture is doing to men and boys what Disney did to women and girlsI don't think she is supposed to be a role model. I read that show as a woman using unhealthy cooling mechanisms to deal with an abusive ex. Like, she is not a hero. Which is why I think it wasn't popular. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/04/22 01:54 AM |
| 28 | Beware of men who try to turn every discussion into an argumentAs someone else who also loves debate, I have fallen into this trap too. Witty debate and banter are huge turn ons, but they usually come with a huge ego. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/04/22 02:03 AM |
| 24 | This example is pick-me nonsense. Stop faking it ladies. There is no such thing as “taking too long”. Men expect orgasms regularly, why can’t we? If you had fun, but didn’t get to climax - you can still tell him you didn’t finish, had a good time & would appreciate him doing more in figuring it out.I'm with a woman now. It's not hard to make her come. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/22 06:05 PM |
| 19 | This example is pick-me nonsense. Stop faking it ladies. There is no such thing as “taking too long”. Men expect orgasms regularly, why can’t we? If you had fun, but didn’t get to climax - you can still tell him you didn’t finish, had a good time & would appreciate him doing more in figuring it out.In my experience, they'll do it for like 15-30 secs max and then go back to whatever they were doing before. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/22 06:04 PM |
| 132 | Man attempts to low-ball his date after getting horrendous advice from Reddit. Queen blocks and deletes in responseRight? Like if he had a budget in mind, why didn't he suggest somewhere first? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/04/22 03:07 PM |
| 35 | Update on my most recent post. Digging into OP’s comment history only confirmed to me what I already thought; he isn’t a good partner to her & she deserves better. I seriously doubt she doesn’t fake cum with him because she sounds v turned off. He asked some1 what a clitoris is. Is this April fools?Also, I would say most of us are voluntary spinster, aka we'd rather be alone than with them, and we are perfectly happy like that. But they can't understand that because it would hurt their poor little egos too much. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 01:50 PM |
| 76 | Men have such rancid energyThis is one of the reasons I'm so glad I work in the arts - almost all women or gay men. Yes, you definitely have to deal with a handful of narcissists with huge egos, which I hate, but most people are great. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/04/22 01:40 PM |
| 3 | If only FDS existed a decade ago…Yes, but I also know I probably wouldn't have gotten here and become the amazing woman Iam without everything that happened to me. Now, I'm not afraid of change or the future because I have handled some bad stuff, and I know I can get through it and be ok. I would never wish what I went through on anyone else, but I would never wish it away from my past either. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/04/22 04:04 PM |
| 41 | Do you believe in the idea of soulmate or soulmates?There is no such thing, imo. Being with someone is an active choice you make every day. I feel like the idea of soul mates abdicates the responsibility we have in our life choices. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/03/22 02:01 PM |
| 152 | I was scrolling through IG and the amount of married/gf men following or commenting on naked women is absolutely insane!I would be so mad. Like I'm fine with my girlfriend going to see a movie because she thinks Angelina Jolie is hot, but like actually posing these things on a real person's ig is definitely cheating to me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/03/22 06:14 PM |
| 42 | New low, disabled men demanding prostitutes under "disability rights"You have a right to do with your body what you want to, but no right to do it to others. Masturbation is a right, in the privacy of your home without watching exploitative materials. That's it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/03/22 06:11 PM |
| 15 | Ted Bundy and the power of pornYeah, it was just crazy to me how he thought he actually had a chance... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/22 01:57 PM |
| 32 | Ted Bundy and the power of pornBack in my pickme days, I had a situationship with a guy who would literally just spend a Saturday drunk jacking off to porn (this is when I learned that men really do watch hours of this shit). I was already almost 20 years younger than him, but he wanted to fuck 18 yos or whatever. Once, he came to watch my soccer game, and how one of the players was like his dream type. SHE WAS THE DAUGHTER OF ONE OF THE WOMEN, like 16 years old. I was absolutely shocked. Now, I'm like, holy shit, dodged a bu… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/22 01:34 PM |
| 7 | Have any of you had an actual relationship from tinder?Only with a woman. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/22 03:22 AM |
| 115 | BBC: "As many as 1 in 3 couples deal with financial infidelity." Don't let it be you--your financial vetting should be your strongest vettingMy NVX owed me thousands of dollars by the eggs of our relationship. I would him out when we would go shopping and his card would get declined. He always insisted he had money and he would pay me back, and we would just be standing in the check out line. I was too naive to know better. Also he would be too lazy to park his car on the street by my apartment and would park in the complex lot, leading him to get towed all the time. Guess who always had to pay because he couldn't afford it? We also … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/03/22 06:14 PM |
| 97 | I’m 23 today sisters and had to thank you all.Damn, wish I had found this place at 23. I was in a similar age gap relationship at your age, but let it go on another 3 years. Would have saved myself so much time. You are amazing and deserve to be treated like a queen. Always remember that! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/03/22 07:13 PM |
| 34 | Men who glorify villainsI think it's a balance. A characteristic of neurodivergence can be intense interest in something. I have it in formula 1. However, while I love f1, watch the races, read articles, write fanfic, etc., I still have lots of hobbies, invest in my career, enjoy a wide variety of activities, and have a personality outside of it. For example, if there was an important event, I wouldn't think twice about missing a race and watching it later. It's when it takes over your while life that it is a problem. … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/03/22 07:05 PM |
| 47 | Men who glorify villainsWtf did I just read. Batman? Like, actually call them that? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/03/22 06:58 PM |
| 30 | I read this thinking there would be a positive ending and it never came 🤦🏼♀️I love how so many of these complaints are just what being an adult is. Like, I do most of these now and I live alone. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/03/22 01:33 PM |
| 33 | (Update) The 52 year old guy who was hitting on me in an educational discord ghosted me after I told him I was not interested in dating his crusty selfWe forget this so often because women are taught to belittle our accomplishments. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 07:37 PM |
| 53 | What is negotiable when it comes to "investing" for a partner?I should add that the new city actually has way more opportunities for me work wise and I have plenty of savings. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 07:35 PM |
| 100 | What is negotiable when it comes to "investing" for a partner?This is a great plan. I'm moving soon to be with my partner, but she lives in a way better city than me and I hate my current job. Even if I got there, and she was like bye, I would still be glad I moved there. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/03/22 07:34 PM |
| 35 | The fake proposal -- anyone else?My nvx thought he was about to get deployed again, so he proposed. However, I wanted to get married in the catholic church and he needed an annulment. He drug his feet on completing that paperwork for literal years. I realize now he probably did it on purpose, afraid I would leave him during deployment (even though we'd already been through 1!). To this day, I'm still not sure he actually wanted to get married. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/03/22 02:10 PM |
| 85 | tw: rape. the comment section is *full* of angry scrotes blaming her, telling her she didn’t get raped, not to ruin the guy’s life because it’s her fault she was drunk.Nothing screams sexy as much as vomiting in a toilet....gross. Honestly, this right here tells me there's no way he didn't know that she couldn't consent. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/03/22 01:39 PM |
| 137 | Red pilled Twitter caught encouraging men not to wear condoms and thinks STIs are part of a government conspiracy to keep birth rates down🤡Any man who uses the term "evolutionary biology" should be blocked immediately. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/22 04:57 PM |
| 56 | This is why casual sex is a big no-no. Thoughts?This is so real. Back in my pickme days, I was in an open relationship with this guy and we would both have plenty of sex with other people. But, he would get mad/ jealous because I would cultivate 4 or 5 ppl and become really good friends with them/ spend time with them not having sex, whereas he would just meet ppl on Craigslist or whatever. Not only did I need the connection, but 90% of men are not good at sex, so I wanted to cultivate the few partners that I did enjoy. But obviously that wou… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/02/22 01:21 PM |
| 55 | How'd You Find FDS?A lovely person DMed me after I posted in a dating over 30 sub how frustrated I was that men seemed to only want to date way below their age. This sub really helped me realize that I don't want a partner like that anyway because I am frankly too good for them (I'm hot with a PhD, lol). Anyway, in part thanks to FDS, I'm now in an amazing relationship with a woman my own age, and I feel this sub has really given me the tools and confidence to not put up with disrespect So, extra thanks to whoever… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/02/22 12:53 PM |
| 7 | Received a Shock Yesterday When My Baby Nieces Started Repeating My Rhetoric Back to MeThis made me cry it is so sweet and wonderful. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/01/22 08:04 PM |
| 21 | My story of the worst NVM I allowed in my life, back in my pickmesha days 🙆🏻♀️Believed he was smarter than everyone but had no $.... Oh, I dated this one once! So arrogant, but never finished college and his parents were supporting him. Always had excuses, but it took him not moving by me to a place with more job opportunities to realize they were all bullshit. So glad I dropped that. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/01/22 05:54 AM |
| 127 | Perfect example of men having issues with your pets being a red flag! And this queen response!!!Cats are very clean. They bathe themselves constantly, which is probably more than this guy can say. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/12/21 02:51 PM |
| 90 | Negging her when she was SICK + embarrassing her in front of friends. At least* commenters got it rightWhen I saw that she had a car and he didn't, I was like, yep, that tracks. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/11/21 09:12 PM |
| 3 | How do you feel about the squid game? Do you think it’s worth watching?I was actually thinking about this while watching a well. There are limits to consent in capitalism that I think this show really highlights. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/11/21 01:59 AM |
| 50 | Vetting/strategizing is not the same as “playing games”, “shit testing” or manipulation.It's not playing games. Everything we do here is honest. Dating is supposed to be about seeing if someone is compatible with you for the long term. FDS just teaches us that if he's not, why waste everyone's time? It's literally the opposite of playing games. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/11/21 03:45 PM |
| 7 | This is why you don't date porn sick men. Of course, there are men in the comments defending this piece of shit. "Its not abusive to want to cum with you partner." Um, yes it if you care more about cuming that your partner.Wtf did I just read... This poor woman! Why do we socialize women to blame their own bodies natural reactions as the problem???? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/10/21 12:57 PM |
| 2 | What are some red flag books, movies, music, shows, stand up comics, podcasts/YouTube channels for men?I had it recommended by my 7th grade English teacher. Looking back, I'm like wtf... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/10/21 06:44 PM |
| 17 | What are some red flag books, movies, music, shows, stand up comics, podcasts/YouTube channels for men?Her philosophies are all about being as selfish and self centered as possible, to the point where the epitome of male virulence and sexuality is rape. All of the sex scenes in her books are rape. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/10/21 01:19 PM |
| 88 | I think all women should have height requirements actually. 😌Or when they complain that you take too long to get ready, but expect you to look like you had professional hair and makeup 24/7 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/21 01:43 PM |
| 17 | Coping with Ex having large circle of friendsI have found that if you are HV, often your close friends will be long distance. Why? 1) HV ppl tend to prioritize leveling up, which often means moving for education/career opportunities or moving to prioritize family/caretaking. 2) Because your friendships are close and meaningful and you know how to be a good friend, you desire to and are able to maintain friendships long distance. If someone means something to you, you put in the effort. 3) HV ppl believe in quality over quantity, so when yo… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/09/21 12:01 PM |
| 44 | Treat relationships with men like they are temporaryI always say I would consider being a parent if I could be the dad. Just come home from work, play with the kid a little bit, and go to bed. You should see how mad this makes LVM. Even though it's true... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 12:41 PM |
| 43 | Stay safe, my UK sistersFor the academic minded. Klaus Theweleit wrote this book called Male Fantasies, where he showed that one of the main themes in literature for those who would become Nazis in Germany in the 1920s and 1930s was misogyny and violence against women. The connections between racism, sexual violence, and fascism are strong. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/09/21 12:33 PM |
| 45 | Why you shouldn't stay in a relationship with a Porn Addict (PA)Back in my before FDS days, I dated a guy who would just watch porn and Jack off for like 3 or 4 hours. I didn't know that this was something men did before I met him - even in my worst pickme days it made me feel super uncomfortable. Like who does that?? Of course, this was also the guy who told me he preferred little breasts (mine are very large) and young women (think 50 yo looking for 20 yos). So gross to me now. We were even at a soccer game and he pointed out this girl he thought was hot. … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/21 05:28 PM |
| 643 | Let’s create a megathread: What is one of the best pieces of advice you’ve learned from this sub that has blown your mind or had the greatest impact on your life?Focus on yourself. It's better to be happy alone than miserable in a relationship. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/09/21 05:09 PM |
| 55 | My therapy after reading so many shitty stories about LVMThat's how I got here, and it totally changed my life. Love you all!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/09/21 02:56 AM |
| 9 | Bisexual queens - what does FDS mean for you?You basically said everything I was going to. If I'm ever single again, I might fuck around with a hot guy or 2, but I will never seek them out for a long term thing again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/21 08:00 PM |
| 8 | If he makes fun of you for going to a community college, he ain’t the one.I have a PhD and would highly recommend CC for your basic requirements to save money. No one cares. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/21 07:56 PM |
| 5 | Making more than your SOHonestly, I'm more interested in 2 things: 1) how does he handle making less money? I find most men become resentful, and things turn toxic. 2) more important than his salary, how financially responsible is he? You can make 6 figures and still be broke. I care way more that the person I am with lives within their means, saves for rainy days, doesn't spend frivolously, etc My LVX made more than me as I was a student, but my family had money and his didn't, so he was always resentful. Even worse w… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/21 07:55 PM |
| 278 | Tell me all of your favourite ways to treat yourself to a date!I love going to restaurants alone, especially fancy ones. I order whatever I want, and just enjoy the ambiance. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/09/21 03:37 PM |
| 16 | What I've learned from dating a HVWHonestly we met on tinder, which is wild but I live in a place where there aren't a lot of queer spaces. Green flags were honestly the same - respecting boundaries, communication, having her shit together. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/09/21 05:14 AM |
| 84 | What I've learned from dating a HVWI will say we met on OLD because we don't live in an area with a vibrant lgbt scene. I think OLD works better for dating women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/21 12:40 AM |
| 23 | What Experts Know About Men Who RapeMy LVX was a 40- something year old who would still blame his parents for not pushing him harder in school. I bought him a bunch of remedial math books and offered to tutor him. Did he do them? Lol. Nope, just kept blaming everyone else. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/09/21 07:31 PM |
| 135 | Attention Male Lurkers: You need to SHUT THE FUCK up about your online dating problemsI feel like this is one of the best things about "aging out" of these apps. Once I hit 30, I stopped getting so much shit. I still get the harassment from time to time, but the level is way lower. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 09:51 PM |
| 78 | I don't like women with stretchmarks!Truth. Just being a woman. It's normal. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 06:03 PM |
| 84 | I don't like women with stretchmarks!Yep. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 01:43 PM |
| 79 | Why didn't we get banned yet?We focus on ourselves. Leveling ourselves up, taking responsibility for our lives. We don't blame men - we take control and cut out the ones that bring us down. We literally want them to just leave us alone! I don't understand the comparison. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 01:29 PM |
| 422 | I don't like women with stretchmarks!But they also want women with curves. Like, that's how you get stretch marks... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/08/21 01:28 PM |
| 21 | "Why Does He Do That?" by Lundy Bancroft has a whole section describing the abuse tactics of softbois (Mr. Sensitive in the book)This is such a great point. I remember when I left my abusive LVX and he would spam me with messages about what a horrible person I was, and I finally responded with "Great, I'm terrible, why do you want to be with me? Leave me alone. " ended up taking a restraining order to get him to leave | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/08/21 06:56 PM |
| 40 | She's a 35 year old mom, he's 58 grandp..dadWe recently let a guy go at my with who's in his late sixties, but has three kids under 18 (the youngest is 8, I think), and a bunch of people were mad because "what about his family?" He had been doing probably about 10 hours a week max for the company, just living off his reputation and narcissistic charm. Like, maybe he should retire??? But he can't, because he made a very poor life choice. And those poor kids - no way they won't be resentful later. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/21 03:15 AM |
| 8 | Watch out for men who read this guys book and listen to his podcast. Massive red flag. He's a racist misogynist neo fascist.....popular growing figure in the Alt-Right. As always...don't be afraid.....BE VIGILANT.Right? Like, so many homosexual men in history have valued and discussed the Greeks because of the common same sex sexual practices. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/08/21 02:36 PM |
| 84 | Why do men take SUCH offense to my reserved demeanor?This is so true. I am also introverted and got called by a woman at work "cold and unapproachable." Nah, sis, I just have boundaries and a life outside of work. Sorry I don't want to spend my precious time texting you or whatever, but when if it's not about work, I don't care. We've only had like 3 conversations... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/08/21 12:54 PM |
| 78 | Every woman should read the book Why Does He Do That by Lundy BancroftWhen I worked at the National Domestic Violence Hotline, it was the #1 recommendation for both staff and victims. So important. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 14/08/21 04:47 PM |
| 250 | First phone call & first date red flagsMy therapist post my LVM abusive relationship told me to be a Bitch when starting to date someone. She meant in the way of setting boundaries and demanding respect. A guy is late to a date? Bye. Cancels last minute? No second chances. It really helped me before I even found FDS. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/21 03:01 AM |
| 12 | A male friend of mine said something interesting to me recently about leveling up.Yep. It's a nice way of weeding them out, tbh. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/21 05:41 PM |
| 116 | A male friend of mine said something interesting to me recently about leveling up.After reading this, I think the problem is there just aren't enough HVM because all of my friends who do have high degrees, etc., feel like we can't ever find someone because the moment a man finds out what we do, they are intimidated. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/08/21 01:34 PM |
| 90 | I've just read the result of a survey: "which of the followings do you consider a BONUS when looking for a male partner?"I actually like thinking about what real bonuses are. It keeps the standards high: good at partner dancing, loves theatre, sommelier level wine skills. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/05/21 04:52 PM |
| 12 | The projection is palpable; I've spent quarantine fixing my skin, working out, and taking college courses. Ya'll?Just scrolled through this thread! Congrats, all you bad ass women! Such inspirations here! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 09:53 PM |
| 18 | The projection is palpable; I've spent quarantine fixing my skin, working out, and taking college courses. Ya'll?I'm in the best shape of my life and the happiest I've ever been. At 33. And things are only looking up! Lololol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 09:49 PM |
| 2 | Reason #4819193 not to date men who watch pornHonestly, I don't for sure. But he brought it up in a more general conversation about the fact that he doesn't really masturbate at all. Like, he didn't know my feelings about it either way when he brought it up. But being with him feels so fundamentally different, that it has to be something. I'm still on guard, though. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/12/20 09:35 PM |
| 79 | Reason #4819193 not to date men who watch pornIt wasn't until FDS that I actually learned what men's porn habits were like. I always assumed it was watching a minute or two to jack off a few times a week. The idea that men watch hours of porn a week is absolutely disgusting, but also make a lot of my past encounters make way more sense. I'm dating a guy now who doesn't watch porn, and the difference is astounding. I feel he really likes me for who I am, not what I look like or do for him sexually (though honestly, that part is pretty good, … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/12/20 03:46 PM |
| 5 | The Introvert Struggle That No-one Talks AboutShe does specify "shy introvert" but I wish she would just say shy. I'm a very outgoing introvert, so this doesn't really apply. Things that do: only wanting/able to go out one night a week, so choosing between friends or a date; the exhaustion of continuous first dates; how to communicate to an extroverted partner that you needing alone time isn't a reflection on them, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/20 09:53 PM |
| 21 | How to deal with LV toxic people (both scrotes & pickmes).I needed this because I am forced to work with the worst old misogynistic dude right now and it is so draining. Plus, I'm living in a small town for the first time in my life, and I can't get over how much everyone gossips etc. Like, I really don't give a shit about any of it. I just want to do the best job I can at work. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/11/20 04:37 PM |
| 46 | Dating someone who doesn't watch porn is better than I expected.I am dating a guy now who doesn't watch porn and the entire relationship is better. He loves to just sit and talk with. Sure, we have amazing sex, but I feel so valued as a person in ways I can't even describe. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/20 02:16 AM |
| 185 | She says that Successful women have a harder time getting successful men. She says that those men are rare first of all and they don’t want to date you because of your achievements. They want you to be HOT as fuck and pure joy to be around . Thoughts ?I think this just shows that successful man does not equal HVM. Like, if that's what he wants, he's just looking for a therapist to have sex with, not a real partner. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/10/20 01:13 PM |
| 23 | Never give men your passwords & always change them after a breakup. NVM will go to any lengths to get revenge. What can we do to help keep women safe?My ex unfriended on my accounts a shit ton of male friends that he didn't like after we broke, and read my messages. I found out he was doing because he had the lack of foresight to then complain about this I was saying to people in dms. Change your passwords! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/10/20 03:27 AM |
| 16 | I literally got downvoted and told not to kinkshame because i said i never had rape fantasies. (:(:I really believe most women have rape fantasies because it's the only way we are allowed to be sexual without being dirty. Like, I was taught that losing my virginity was the worst thing in the world, so my 14 year old brain was like, but if it's not my choice, then I'm still clean or whatever bs. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/09/20 02:14 PM |
| 51 | When i saw people calling this a sub for "nasty/evil/crazy/scary" women i immediately got hopeful and wanted to see whats up, not despite of the reputation but BECAUSE of it. Because every time women are doing something RIGHT it's rebranded by men as "nasty/evil/etc"Yeah, a lovely person on this sub told me to come here after posting in dating over 30 how age appropriate men seem obsessed with women in their early 20s. I have found so much validation and life here. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/09/20 01:34 AM |
| 2 | This sub ruined my marriage!!! 🤣Omg, after I left but before I changed my phone number, he would go between calling me horrible things and wanting me back. I once replied with that same question. Lol. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/08/20 12:56 PM |
| 24 | This sub ruined my marriage!!! 🤣I went to therapy because my lvm ex convinced me I was such a bad partner and I wanted to be a better one. Jokes on him, because it helped me see he didn't respect my boundaries and I deserved better. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/08/20 02:08 AM |
| 24 | Please don't.This. When I was super young, I was with a lvm like 18 years older who had 2 kids, but they lived in another state with their mom. He paid child support, but hardly had any relationship with his kids. Back then, I was relieved because I don't want kids, but also, they were only like 7 years younger than me. Looking back, I'm like, that was so fucked up. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 06:12 PM |
| 9 | Successes, failures, and lessons learned this week? Let’s discuss.I was doing well with a guy that might be a hvm, but slept with him too soon and am now feeling insecure, so my plan is just to wait for him to ask me out again as hard as it is not to get clingy. If he does, great, but if not, I'm just going to remind myself it's his loss, learn from my mistake, and move on. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 02:20 AM |
| 31 | Most men are just parasites.I am working with a LVM, who is definitely like this. I work in arts admin and he's the artistic director, so it's so frustrating. He just hands me sheets of paper and note cards with random shit written on them and then expects me to turn it into something. He's like "I'm an idea person." Bitch, me too, but ideas mean nothing without execution. Of course, he also always complains about how I do things. This 70yo man wants me to be his work mommy, lol. This is a new job, and I will not be doing … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 12:40 PM |
| 8 | HVM and stdsFollow-up: it went great! He was so sweet! His biggest concern was if it made sex difficult for me! So happy. Still don't know if he's the one for me but this has given me a lot of confidence. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/08/20 02:59 AM |
| 35 | What is the correct FDS answer to 'What are you looking for?'?I say, "I'm super happy being single, but if I meet the right person who makes my life better and wants to share it with me, that's great." | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 02:36 AM |
| 143 | I’ve been seeing this post all over ig lately...not sure what to think about it. Thoughts?Depends on where this is. Like, if this was in midtown Manhattan, fine. That's just what it looks like if you aren't a millionaire. But if this is like Springfield, Ohio, no way. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/08/20 02:33 AM |
| 3 | HVM and stdsI'm the OP, lol. And unless we wanted to have kids or he had a vasectomy, I want the dude to use condoms. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 09:34 PM |
| 3 | HVM and stdsThis is not actually the case. I take daily medication to lower the risk of transmission, so if you use protection, it's about the same level of risk as getting pregnant with a condom. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 12:38 PM |
| 15 | I’m so sick of LVM and OLDMaybe I'm getting old, but I have been stunned by the number of guys I haven't even met from OLD that want pictures, particularly explicit ones. The first time it happened, I was so confused. Like, why? You don't even know me. There is so much porn on the internet if that is what you want. I still don't really get their interest in it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/08/20 04:02 AM |
| 17 | The double standard is astoundingFor real. I also have huge bonds and a PhD. I don't need those LVM. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/08/20 03:02 AM |
| 16 | Trend on tiktok: 'Call "feminist" urgency numbers and ask for the man in charge'. In a pandemic where abuse skyrocketed.🦆ing LVM/NVM have NO LIFE AT ALL.Oh yeah, we had a binder for repeat callers and a binder for sex/prank callers. And I was in graduate school, too | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/08/20 02:39 AM |
| 65 | Trend on tiktok: 'Call "feminist" urgency numbers and ask for the man in charge'. In a pandemic where abuse skyrocketed.🦆ing LVM/NVM have NO LIFE AT ALL.Having worked at one of these hotlines, this sucks so much. People think it's like 20 people, but the reality is sometimes only 1 or 2 people are answering all the calls, making it impossible to answer the real calls. If any of you live in a city that has one (I worked at one in Austin), please volunteer! They always need more help! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/08/20 11:38 PM |
| 28 | The bulk of this post is focused on telling the world how unattractive he used to think women like his future wife are. Colorism affects these LVM's brains to the core. They will not accept what a white society tells them not to.Wow, talk about telling on himself.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/07/20 10:43 PM |
| 46 | Men who perpetuate impossible beauty standards don't actually require women to look that way, they just want an excuse to bully and mistreat women for failing to achieve them. So, basically all women. It's time we start holding men to the same standards.I highly recommend reading Naomi Wolf's book "The Beauty Myth." It really opened my eyes to a lot of these issues, including how much $$ it costs to be a woman. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 31/07/20 02:36 AM |
| 4 | “You’re bad at communicating”I really am! Moving for a new job, great friends, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 01:51 AM |
| 7 | “You’re bad at communicating”The therapy helped me learn to set boundaries, but I stayed with him for 2 more years until he got physically violent with me. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 07:21 PM |
| 14 | “You’re bad at communicating”Dude. I literally went to therapy because my abusive ex kept telling me I was a bad partner and couldn't communicate. By that, he meant, couldn't read his mind. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 29/07/20 05:54 PM |
| 60 | CondomsOnce, a guy didn't want to use a condom, and I threw up on him. Pretty proud of that moment, honestly. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/07/20 03:40 AM |
| 3 | On January 2nd I gave up dating and instead focused on my net worthWhen I left, my abusive LVM owed me over 4k, most of which he took without asking. I think I stayed as long as I did because I wanted my money back... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/07/20 02:16 PM |
| 4 | LVM PUA Tactics on OLD.When he said he slept with 100s of women, I wanted to barf. Like, I have a high body count, but I would never brag about it or phrase it that way. Also 100s seems so excessive. Like did her ever sleep with them more than once? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 11:04 PM |
| 10 | First time poster long time lurker. This question is intended for women who have dated white men.Lol I am white and used to teach college. I could never remember the names of the white frat bros. They dressed the same, acted the same, etc. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 04:24 PM |
| 3 | When your date has high earning potential but cannot afford paying all of the couple expenses, should I split the bill until he can in years?There are signs to look for that I recognize now. What are their excuses? Do they take any responsibility for the situation they are in? Do they have a concrete plan on how to achieve those goals? Are they open to help? But if they did eventually achieve things, good for them, but timing wasn't right for us. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/07/20 01:56 PM |
| 26 | When your date has high earning potential but cannot afford paying all of the couple expenses, should I split the bill until he can in years?Don't date potential is advice I wish I had gotten ten years ago. I kept dating guys that were "going" to do things, ie go back to school, get a better job. Spoiler: they never did, and I wasted years of my life. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/07/20 06:34 PM |
| 7 | Pretty much all of the comments were telling her she needs to COmMuNiCaTeFor real, this. My ex LVM had horrible PTSD, and I excused so much shitty behavior because of it. But when I tried to set boundaries around being his therapist and talking about his experiences (he was a soldier in Iraq) because I have my own issues, I was suddenly a "bad girlfriend" and "didn't care about him. " | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 17/07/20 03:33 PM |
| 6 | This one goes out to all the Kinkmeisha’s lurking. We’re here when you’re ready.Yes! I was involved a lot in the BDSM scene starting at 19, and as I got older, wiser, and more self- confident, I started to feel so uncomfortable with a lot of the men and how they clearly just used kink as an excuse to hurt and abuse women. I luckily found a few men who aren't like that and I am still friends with them/will sometimes bottom when I'm single. But honestly, the rampant misogyny and abuse are why I left. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/07/20 05:21 PM |
| 21 | Harsh truthSo real. I just had the opposite, where I just wanted a quarantine FWB and when I told him I didn't think you should assume your exclusive with someone until you actually talk about it, and he immediately dropped me! Men are such babies about their double standards.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 15/07/20 12:58 AM |
| 12 | Your insecurity about him watching porn is valid, and reason enough to expect a no-porn in your relationship.What documentaries do you recommend? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/07/20 04:08 PM |
| 8 | It does NOT fucking matter WHY he's problematic, that's NOT. YOUR. PROBLEM.So true. I stayed with my abusive LVM for way too long, excusing his behavior because he had PTSD from the military. Eventually, I realized he wasn't trying to get better and that it didn't matter - I deserved to feel safe and supported in my relationship and it wasn't my job to fix him. Also, he constantly blamed the fact that he wasn't doing well in college because his parents didn't push him academically as a kid. The dude was in his late 30s... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/07/20 04:10 PM |
| 2 | My ex made me feel sooo crazy for not wanting his female “bestie” to constantly touch him and say ily to him. It’s good to know I wasn’t crazy and my boundaries are valid.I think it helps if you try to be friends with the wife or girlfriend too and separately. Get to know her, invite her for a girl's day, etc. That way she can see that you're invested in the relationship between them being successful | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 10:31 PM |
| 1 | My ex made me feel sooo crazy for not wanting his female “bestie” to constantly touch him and say ily to him. It’s good to know I wasn’t crazy and my boundaries are valid.As a bi woman, I hate the idea that you can't just be friends with someone because of their gender - like, should I have no friends? I like this video because it points out the red flags, but also acknowledges that there can be platonic friendships of any gender configuration | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/07/20 10:30 PM |
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