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Imaginary-Tie-5724 Archive

View 5 posts and 14 comments by Imaginary-Tie-5724 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

With how we divided time, nearly all extracurricular activities will fall on my time. Which I'm fine with, I just want to make sure they can attend things. This extracurricular feels like a big 180. Just two weeks ago, I'd asked her to watch the kids during the normal time for a parents planning meeting. She started texting asking where I was when it ran over 10 minutes. Now she wants to take them. Also, since I've been handling this one for years, I did talk with some about my divorce, and one …
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/26 04:24 AM
1

Just finished a contentious back and forth with my STBXW on this topic. I was the one that took out the loans, but then she started to get particular on how project work and side income was allocated in the proposal, and saying how she needs more due to our income discrepancies. I wasn't wanting to consider the loans, but after getting very particular, I pointed how my current role required the STEM bachelors to start, and my project work requires at least a masters, and that then these should b…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/26 11:54 AM
1

I'm in there with you. I've filed but still taking a bit to get it finalized. I've used wife, ex, soon-to-be-ex-wife pretty interchangeably.
/r/Divorce_Men20/03/26 02:11 AM
1

I appreciate all the helpful advice! The conversation went as well as could be expected. My youngest I don't think fully understands and will probably process more once the physical separation happens. My oldest has been a bit anxious and asking a lot of questions, but I've stayed calm, assured him it is not his fault or anyones, that we love them very much, and answered any of his logistics questions appropriately. Still hurts to hear some of the questions he asks trying to process it, and just…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 02:03 PM
3

I wouldn't say men/women issues are black and white. My soon to be ex wife I've learned is a dismissive avoidant, and one who still has unresolved childhood assault trauma. But she coped by becoming detached, and I'm an anxious type and it caused me to overlook or explain away a lot. I initially felt she was blunt and honest with her feelings, which was comforting, but learned later she was just trying to avoid any conflict. We ended up married 10 years with kids, but she's admitted she lied dur…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/26 12:49 PM
2

Thank you for this, I will take your advice to heart. I think calming my own emotions and showing that steady presence will be the most difficult thing for me. I think you're right too about them probably sensing it even at their ages. My oldest has been more anxious and making more offhand comments about Mommy and Daddy loving each other lately.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 04:26 AM
2

Thank you. It's hard not to feel that I've done something wrong in their eyes, but I need to keep reminding myself that. I'm going to keep showing up and help them process this in whatever capacity they need.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 04:17 AM
6

So by the time I got my wife into marriage counseling we had pretty much already decided it was over, but I just wanted to make sure I tried everything I could. Session was interesting, but ultimately just confirmed what we came in knowing. She still held on to resentment and refused to try to work on the relationship together. Afterward, I was having trouble with finding a personal therapist and ended up finding that the marriage counselor could get me for individual. It was pretty validating t…
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/25 01:39 PM
1

My wife did not cheat, but apparently after having our second child she decided that she resented me for making her a mother (we planned the first kiddo together, second just happened) and emotionally disconnected. She apparently wanted to stay together for what I provided and because of the kids. A lot happened during/post COVID: moved, career change, finishing school, family death, medical issues, juggling extra side work. But I was always the go-to parent, always made time, and always checked…
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/25 01:49 PM
2

First girl I was with was a lot more experienced. I had no idea what I was doing. I tried to talk through what to try or how to do what she might like, but she was not having that and wanted me to just DO. I tried awkwardly and she cut off sex after two months using a pregnancy scare as an excuse and started cheating. I was already nervous about performing, and it absolutely killed my confidence with it. I still struggle with staying out of my head during, especially if I'm on top.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 01:17 PM
4

Wow. Although I'm fairly certain there's been no propositioning/infidelity, your fourth point resonates almost exactly what I've been experiencing and feeling. We are currently putting a plan together for a (hopefully) amicable divorce without much more than mediator involvement. Two young children, ten years of marriage. Mine absolutely refused personal therapy and begrudgingly did a marriage counseling session to appease me. But there has been nothing but walls and avoidance with her in commun…
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 01:09 PM
1

I think this was there a bit, but she claims she put she never wanted kids in her dating profiles, though I honestly don't feel the one we met on said that. Regardless, the deciding on children happened years later. She never said then she didn't want kids, just that she wasn't sure she felt comfortable about the whole pregnancy/birthing process but thought she would want to adopt. I told her I understood, and would probably be okay with that, but had some anxieties on how I might connect to a k…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 11:08 AM
1

I appreciate the comments. It just stings. The more I look back, the more I feel that the romantic/emotional connection was never there. Especially looking at how the relationship began, and recently seeing some info on her dating patterns at that time, it's clear I was more of the "nice enough" that she had zero desire to get close to. I'd needed both desire and a sense of intimacy for sex as well while she recently admitted she's generally has always been detached from it emotionally. The reas…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 10:57 AM
3

I'm just learning about these and am positive I've been married to one the past ten years. I'm strongly considering divorce, but I'm going to give marriage counseling a try before I do. Everything I've seen makes it seem unsalvageable though. We also have two kids, and they still seem oblivious to it all and talk like we are great partners. I don't know if that's good or bad, but it has me nervous on how they will react to a split.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/25 02:53 AM
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