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KreepyKritter03 Archive

View 5 posts and 34 comments by KreepyKritter03 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

I think you've misread the op. I'm divorcing her because she's caused borderline PTSD in our 14 year old child... Because she's a narcissistic, abusive alcoholic. And I've put up with it for 15 years. Why would I continue to subject myself or my child to unapologetic abuse?
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/20 02:29 AM
3

You sound like the opposing counsel. If he was the victim of any other violence from any other source, there'd be no question about his ability to testify.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 06:08 PM
0

With all due respect, you haven't met my kid. He ASKED to testify. Asked to be present. Was more than happy to testify in open court if the judge refused in chambers. Has stated on multiple occasions he wants nothing to do with his mother, full stop. Yes, better preparation would have been advisable, obviously. But given the state of the world, there was no way to get the therapist on the stand, and the clinic wouldn't allow her to include a written affidavit without a subpoena.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 05:56 PM
-1

I've already clarified that position going forward. There are court appointed child advocates in the state that operate on a volunteer basis, at no cost. Therapy is outpatient, and I don't want to involve protective services and have it end up looking like a petty end-run around a court order. We'd need something clear, demonstrable and actionable for that, and I don't know that they're going to accept anything short of visible marks of violence in this fucking "Mommy Knows Best" state.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 04:37 PM
0

As mentioned above, we honestly thought that hearing the testimony of an articulate 14 year old was just going to be a given. Never anticipated that a judge would shut it down so completely.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 04:19 PM
1

He pressed the issue as hard as he could, and in hindsight I can't see how just putting him on the stand would have made things much worse.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 04:18 PM
0

Honestly, I've never heard of a judge not being willing to at least HEAR FROM a child of my son's age. We were blindsided by a judge who doesn't work family law in his home district.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 04:05 PM
1

For me, I'd rather have my kid full-time. She's pressing the 50/50 angle because she's worried about paying child support. I just want my kid to be safe, but in my case it's not just two people growing apart and wanting what's best for their kids in spite of their disagreements as people. My STBXW is legitimately mentally and emotionally abusive and has a history of alcoholism, drug use, and neglect... 50/50 is great for parents who want to be good parents. For parents who just want to feel like…
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 03:26 PM
1

I'm currently dealing with the aftermath of calling my STBX's bluff. I'm literally in the same boat, I've got 9 more months of this hell before we're going to be in the clear on any of it. What put me into action was the realization that my kids were being affected by that behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 03:12 PM
0

Opposing counsel basically tried to paint it as if he couldn't speak to his own interests.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 02:59 PM
1

He's already in therapy (at his request) and has been since January. Scheduling hasn't been great, since the pandemic and the fact that they're high traffic anyway. I know failing to comply with the TCO has some pretty horrendous outcomes, and I hate that my hands are tied right now over it, but there's literally nothing I can do for the next 9 weeks unless a judge agrees that the potential risk to his well-being is clear enough to warrant waiving mediation.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/20 02:51 PM
4

My aunt used to say that god made babies cute so you don't choke them in their sleep... My cousins are fine, btw. It's pretty natural to get frustrated as a parent, and feel like you're not a good parent, which naturally leads to feelings of misplaced anger as a result of feeling like you're failing in some way or made a mistake in becoming a parent to start with. It sounds more like there's something deeper than I might be willing to share with a bunch of internet strangers. I'd recommend findi…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/20 05:44 PM
3

I was that kid. My parents divorced when I was 2. My dad was a union welder in the Pacific Northwest, which meant traveling for jobs on a regular basis. In spite of this, and my mother eventually remarrying when I was 8, he never missed visitation. Because of his schedule, this was every 3rd weekend and alternating school holidays. I NEVER considered my mother's new husband to be my "Dad". I ALWAYS valued the time I spent with my dad. He'd drive 4 hours each way to make sure he was there and tha…
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/20 10:45 AM
2

Get a family law attorney. Explain exactly what you want in terms of custody, visitation, and the like, and fight like hell to get it. If paternity is an accepted fact, you have parental rights whether or not you were legally married. Also, child support is independent of custody or visitation. This is especially true if she ends up filing for public assistance of any kind, as most states consider that if support was being paid then public assistance might not be needed.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/20 10:36 AM
1

You're also comparing apples to oranges. You're making far more per month than any enlisted member, and most officer, and support is based on a percentage of that. The court is only looking at preserving a standard of living for the kids (in theory). Now, if she misuses that support money, you might have grounds to appeal, but that's a different conversation.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/20 03:01 AM
1

I'm going to echo others and suggest a lawyer. I make about a quarter of what you do, and I'm not about to wade into a battle without being armed. ​ That said, 20 years ago in Washington state, on a Union Welder's pay, my dad paid the same amount per kid as you're talking about, just to put things in perspective.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/20 01:39 AM
3

Typically, if you can show at least 6 months residence, you can file in your state of residence. Unless your ex is particularly vindictive, and has a lot of spare money to throw at it, it's really just a matter of filing. If you can get her to sign on the dotted line, it can be under $1k. If you need court representation because she scares up a money hungry shark who can smell blood in the water, you might have a fight on your hands.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/20 01:30 AM
1

That would depend on the timing of the inheritance relative to the timing of the divorce. If he inherited a sum prior to the divorce, and it was sizable enough AND it was still substantial enough to matter to the court AND they'd been living off of it to an extent then it's possible a judge might consider it a marital asset.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/20 12:56 PM
2

That's fair play, but I'd still have a hard time being present for a \potential** relationship while still living inside the corpse of another one. I'm in evac mode right now, just trying to nail down a lease that won't eat my asshole.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/20 07:30 PM
2

That's a challenge. For me, I don't know that I'd be able to even start down that road until I'm living separate from my STBX.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/20 03:19 PM
1

I've pegged that as priority 1. It's one thing to have empathy for another human, but quite another to take responsibility for things beyond your control.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/20 03:36 AM
1

This hit pretty fucking close for me... " manhandles the kids in anger, refuses therapy, yells at me and the kids all the time for not doing chores quick enough or the right way, calls me a failure... " Gotta say though, I'm a bit jealous. NC is 12 months and all I can think of is that I'm abandoning my step-son, even though he just turned 18... I still fucking apologize all the goddamn time for shit that I don't need to apologize for.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/20 03:27 AM
2

Hindsight is 20/20. I should have taken her mother's warning to heart, but if I had I wouldn't have my daughter in my life now. You're absolutely right, being angry all the time, throwing tantrums and demanding an apology from us for their behavior is infantile. That said, I'm not writing off an entire gender just because a fraction of them are control freak, lunatic, manipulators... But it'll be a while. I've got some"Me" shit to figure out.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/20 01:56 PM
0

I did not cheat. I verbally communicated with female humans other than her. It takes 2 people to fail at communicating. The fight over visitation/custody with my step-son wouldn't have gone my way at all.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/20 10:08 AM
1

Thanks. Things won't really start getting better until we can move out, but I can see the light at the end of the tunnel.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/20 01:38 AM
1

During my initial consultation, my attorney was shocked at how well informed I was going into the process. It also meant we were able to get a lot more ground covered in that hour than he's normally accustomed to. Educating yourself means your lawyer doesn't have to waste billable hours to catch you up as frequently.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 04:16 PM
1

It's going to be a long process, but I'm more concerned about helping my daughter recover from the last 14 years.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 04:04 PM
1

Where I live, no action can begin in the courts until we're living separately. Can't even file the agreement.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 01:27 PM
2

Effectively, the the court recognizes the date of separation as the date that cohabitation is terminated. So, it doesn't matter what date documents are signed as long as it can be proven that both parties are living in different homes.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/20 01:11 PM
2

Given that my daughter has been extremely blunt and direct about wanting to get away from my wife, and the fact that I'm both employed and stable, I'm not worried about a lawyer being able to show sufficient evidence of fitness.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/19 11:21 PM
1

Oh, it won't be easy. They never are. And statutes require a 12 month separation period, so quick is also off the table. All I can hope for is minimal cost. But, I've been the guy helping pick up the pieces for friends often enough that I'm under no illusion as to the importance of representation.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/19 10:04 PM
1

That was my thought too. Even if I'm willing to be pragmatic and take responsibility for not pushing her to get back into the job market it doesn't mean she's going to take responsibility for her lack of action.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/19 08:36 PM
1

Lesson received. Get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/19 05:44 PM
1

Good lord... have you been living my mirror life? For me it was my daughter broaching the subject of divorce. In any event, I'm in the same boat as you, up to and including the irrational levels of anger and verbal abuse.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/19 04:02 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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