EOW vs 50/50

Knave7575 · 2020-09-29T17:38:11+00:00

Not even for a second. 50/50 is wonderful, and in retrospect the only mistake I made was not realizing just HOW important it actually was.

As in, I wasn't sure if it was worth bankrupting myself to get it, but in retrospect it would have been. Luckily, I was mostly self-repping so I was able to get it relatively cheaply.

playerknowmore · 2020-09-29T19:19:49+00:00

May I ask how old are you, and how old are the child.

That said, no way I'm not going to be the biggest factor I can be in my children's life. You do know if you give her full custody you have no say of what goes on in her house; step dad will have more say than you.

Also before you make such a move speak with your parents; don't have them fighting for grand-parental rights.

lemmingsrevenge · 2020-09-29T18:06:56+00:00

You can always work it out with your ex out of court. I would argue that don't do EOW f-Sun, Do EOW Wed-Mon. Also work out vacations and the like.

Brother you do you, screw what others think. If EOW works for you, people shouldn't think any less of you because of it.

Many times in divorce we get so caught up in score keeping, that some how we're the lesser parent because the courts ruled we only get the kids EOW. If you're comfortable with it, screw what others think.

You still get time with your kids, and it's still plenty of time to guide and raise them.

4agreements · 2020-09-30T15:52:43+00:00

Sometimes it’s better for kids to have the parent with more patience and time to give. It’s easier to write a check than parent.

Danthesongparodyman · 2020-09-29T17:38:17+00:00

EOW is not a parent. It's a visitor. EOW is good if you're unable or unwilling to parent your children.

KreepyKritter03 · 2020-10-01T15:26:53+00:00

For me, I'd rather have my kid full-time. She's pressing the 50/50 angle because she's worried about paying child support. I just want my kid to be safe, but in my case it's not just two people growing apart and wanting what's best for their kids in spite of their disagreements as people. My STBXW is legitimately mentally and emotionally abusive and has a history of alcoholism, drug use, and neglect... 50/50 is great for parents who want to be good parents. For parents who just want to feel like they're in control of another human's existence, it's a fucking nightmare.

Square_Judge_8821 · 2020-10-01T17:57:18+00:00

My ex wanted 50/50. Judge determined 70/30 in my favor. A couple years after the divorce and he only exercises about 20%. So it's 80/20 in my favor. I figure in a couple years it will be 90/10, assuming he doesn't move away. He wanted the image of this involved father, not actually to be an involved father. He wanted to win, what was fair, men's rights. I'm glad the judge didn't do 50/50 because it's so messed up for the kids. They don't deserve constant rejection. The kids get stability from me and a fun dad. I just hope he won't get bored with them.

StruckByRedLightning · 2020-09-30T09:47:00+00:00

I am starting to face this now. My wife is proposing 50/50. But I work and she doesn’t. I want maximum time with my kids, but how do I work and have them all week? But then, like the only reason I work is to support my wife and kids, I’d be happy living in a tent. But then, I’m going to be locked into 15 years of supporting my wife because she doesn’t work. And if she doesn’t work and doesn’t have the kids half the time, what the hell is she doing?

It’s a total dumpster fire. It’s like the whole system is set up to say “well you worked for the last ten years and she didn’t, so just keep doing that”. WTF?!? And how do I sign up to be the non-monied spouse in my next relationship??

used2befast · 2020-09-30T14:53:27+00:00

I fought like a bastard for 50/50 and spent about $90,000 doing so. And I had it and lost it due to a scathing PRE report that my wife orchestrated with her attorney. My wife is an attorney herself as well as a very well liked and known politician and I was up against a proverbial godzilla.

I caved in mediation due to attacks from my wife agains my dead mothers estate and my fathers real estate holdings.

I've resigned myself to accepting the fact that the mother used the kids as pawns in a corrupt system to control me like she always did. The saddest thing of it all is the kids lost their dad in their daily lives.

I'll be there for them and enjoy the quality time with them that remains. But there will be no more trips to europe and elsewhere. No more reading to the kids in bed. No more fun stuff every day after school.

I'll focus on myself now. I'll focus on my businesses. I'll travel more and make the most of my remaining days on this rock

Title	EOW vs 50/50
Author	KissMyConverse-
Upvotes	7
Comments	23
Date	September 29, 2020 5:02 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/j23c9w/eow_vs_5050/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/eow-vs-5050.817856 https://theredarchive.com/post/817856

Comments