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M_riane Archive

View 4 posts and 166 comments by M_riane on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Dump him. Dump him!
/r/RedPillWomen09/07/17 06:33 PM
1

If you feel the relationship is on the right track otherwise, then I wouldn't worry. A lot of guys are careful with that word. In my opinion it's better than guys who say it too quickly.
/r/RedPillWomen01/07/17 09:47 PM
1

Hug to you too, thanks for the wishes and congratulations!
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/17 12:21 PM
1

That's so good to hear. The ectopic was very scary, with all the nurses looking worried and the doctor saying they had to do surgery right away or I would die that day. That that would happen again is what's scaring me most. But we have to try again because we want a little boy or girl too :)
/r/RedPillWomen28/05/17 12:20 PM
–

Seriously? I have had episodes of hyperthyroidism in the past. I don't know if they checked it this time. I'll definitely ask, thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:39 PM
–

Thanks, that's sweet of you :) I try to think that, but sometimes when I see everyone else getting pregnant I kind of get desperate
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:36 PM
–

I've started to eat healthy again and take my pre-natal vitamins. And uhm... what kind of different ways of intercourse :)? We heard that the classic pose is the best one?
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:28 PM
2

Thanks, it's reassuring to hear that. Maybe I'm being too pessimistic at this point. I'm really happy it worked out for you :)
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:27 PM
5

I think you're right. I feel that our society, generally, gives you the idea that you should have your sh*t together by 35, and that's when you should really start if you want a baby. But what if you want more than one, or what if it doesn't work out right away? That's also the human mind, I think: we always feel like we're not going to be the ones with the bad luck, we will have a baby right away when we want to, we're not going to be one of those women. I thought the same thing. And it's true …
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:26 PM
–

Thanks. I hope so too. I just keep looking for causes and age is the only one I can find, but I guess it happens to younger women too.
/r/RedPillWomen27/05/17 09:19 PM
–

Have you known this guy for long? I'd say that if you see a person only one night in your life, even if he is great, it's normal that you don't really care if you see him again. You can't get attached to someone in one night. Your feelings depend on a lot of things and there is no 'normal' after a first date. Ask ten married couples and you'll get ten different stories about how their feelings developed. I'd give it another couple of dates and see how you feel then.
/r/RedPillWomen13/05/17 03:51 PM
1

Happened to me once. I was sad and a bit pissed off about losing the friendship, but it didn't make me want him.
/r/RedPillWomen02/05/17 12:06 PM
–

No, I mean, you say you saved yourself until marriage, but at the same time you made sure you were at the same wavelength about your convictions and ideas about sexuality. But don't you have the risk that you find out something major about your sexuality that you didn't know before because you didn't have actual experience? For example, that one of the two has a way higher sex drive than the other?
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/17 09:39 PM
–

Just curious: how do you know what your ideas and convictions regarding sexuality are, if you don't have any experience with it?
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/17 08:25 PM
10

Amused or intrigued? No. Most people don't spend a lot of time thinking about other people. Are men intrigued by girls who can't get a man?
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/17 12:55 PM
5

If you're in love with him but he's not in love with you, he'll always have the power in the relationship. You'll always be emotionally dependent on him. Can you live with that? Can you live with a man who isn't in love with you? And do you think that your bond will be strong enough for him to stay with you if he meets someone he does fall in love with? I'm also always a bit suspicious of people who blame their mental problems for their lack of feelings or to keep their partner at a distance. It…
/r/RedPillWomen30/04/17 08:25 AM
1

I'm in media, I was always drawn to language, words and ideas. He's in finance, he's very rational and loves math and numbers.
/r/RedPillWomen28/04/17 08:13 AM
2

Thanks :( Ofcourse, you know your husband best. If the door is closed, it's closed. But in a loving relationship there's always room for someone to change their mind. I really hope you can work it out.
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/17 07:34 PM
–

I don't agree entirely. You shouldn't force your husband to change his mind, but you should give him the opportunity to do so. Tell him how you feel and give him time to process it and to think about what this means for him. There are so many young guys who gradually change their mind about kids. Do you think that all those thirtysomething dads pictured themselves with kids when they were 24? My SO was ambivalent about it, hovering towards no. I made it clear that for me, it was a priority. At o…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/17 04:53 PM
–

Talk to your husband about this. Children are not something you can compromise on, but he wouldn't be the first guy to change his mind when he sees you really want it. also, don't base your decision on wether or not you 'like babies'. It annoys me when people say they don't want kids because 'babies just don't interest them'. Children are babies for about a year and a half. They grow up. Don't ask yourself if you want a baby, ask yourself if you want a family. Don't just think about the next fiv…
/r/RedPillWomen26/04/17 08:45 AM
–

O God, what a sad story :(
/r/RedPillWomen21/04/17 05:02 PM
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Haha, are you serious? One of these days you have to do a post on your entire life story :)
/r/RedPillWomen21/04/17 12:33 PM
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I think the Racked article is pretty good. It has a clear topic, it's illustrated nicely, it's well written. That she doesn't agree in the end is her right.
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/17 07:08 AM
10

I work in media. It's a bad piece. There are so many ways she could have written a good article about it, even if it meant completely burning us down. There could be examples in it from the stuff we write, which she could have mercilessly commented on, some quotes for illustration, a breakdown of the ideas here, and a clear explanation of what red pill is - she expects too much pre-existing knowledge from her reader. After this piece, the audience still has no idea what's going on at RPW or what…
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/17 06:24 AM
7

It's really been a while since I've seen a hateful discussion here. On RP yes, but on RPW?
/r/RedPillWomen20/04/17 06:15 AM
15

Sex out of wedlock: sure. Sex without commitment: usually not a good idea.
/r/RedPillWomen17/04/17 03:39 PM
2

I very rarely reject him, only if he had too much to drink and I'm completely sober, then I really don't feel like it. But that's happened like two times or something. To be honest, I would like it if he'd initiate a bit more ofter. He's always up for it, but doesn't in any way want to force me (he's a gentleman like that) so I think it's about 3:1 times that I initiate. But you know, that's just a minor thing, I don't really mind.
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/17 01:27 PM
8

It could work, absolutely. I know couples where it works. I know my brother would happily quit his job to care for his daughter full time if it was financially possible. For me personally I don't see it. Part of what I love about my SO is his drive and the way he's committed to his job. I don't know if I could be attracted to someone who didn't work. Maybe if he had interesting hobbies or projects going on; a friend dated a guy who didn't have a job but spend his time coding and building technic…
/r/RedPillWomen14/04/17 12:54 PM
1

What you want seems totally fine and normal, and when you find a good man you'll notice that your mother's influence will lessen and you'll grow more resolved in following your own path. Also keep in mind that you don't need the whole world's approval for your decisions. That's impossible. 'Career women' aren't universally approved of either. Just keep in mind that we don't always get what we want necessarily. Nothing guarantees you a great guy at the perfect age. So make sure you always have en…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/17 05:21 PM
4

Who are your favourite and least favourite characters? Elizabeth is a fantastic character because she shows how to be a classy woman while having a strong personality at the same time. What social conventions of the time do you think were beneficial to the happiness of the people? The emphasis on good social behaviour. For example, there's a lot of comment on certain people being 'well-bred', meaning they're good at conversation, polite, etc. Also, the generations seemed to mingle a lot more tha…
/r/RedPillWomen13/04/17 03:11 PM
2

I don't like the sound of that... I mean you can have a dynamic where you completely trust each other and can joke about those things, but make sure that once you tell him you don't like it, he stops. Your boyfriend should not praise every single thing you do, but in general he should make you feel good about yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 05:37 PM
4

Oh, I'm so sorry you feel that way. Please know you're not alone and make an appointment with a mental health professional. It might not feel like that right now but you can feel better!
/r/RedPillWomen12/04/17 03:23 PM
6

I lost my virginity at 23 and I have a great sex life today! Think of it this way: we just skipped the phase where you have to deal with awkward teenage boys who don't know what they're doing. We didn't miss a lot :) don't despair, your day will come.
/r/RedPillWomen05/04/17 06:52 AM
3

Get more help. Get better help. My sister in law had similar feelings towards me and my brother's ex. Her obsession grew step by step until she crossed the line. Don't ever indulge in these feelings, correct yourself everytime, do not make any excuse for them.
/r/RedPillWomen04/04/17 03:53 PM
–

At what age did you have your children? SO and I are trying and I'm kind of scared I left it too late.
/r/RedPillWomen01/04/17 07:10 PM
1

My SO and I live together. We're both not very marriage minded. Moving in together was the big commitment for us.
/r/RedPillWomen23/03/17 01:22 PM
2

My boyfriend was away for seven months! Some things I did during that period: 1. Got the house painted and in order (probably a bit ambitious for three week) 2. Bought him a bottle of whisky as a welcome home gift 3. Picked him up at the airport with a large and ridiculous sign :) 4. Took photos of some occasions he missed, of the painting process, of myself... and gave those to him as het got back 5. Took a lot of time for myself, read a lot, learned to be more independent
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 09:25 PM
3

I agree. I get the instinctive preference for someone taller than oneself. But I also have friends who insist their guy has to be 1,90 m (sorry I'm European) at the least... that's just shallow and picky.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 09:18 PM
6

Guess it has something to do with feeling protected. But a guy doesn't need to be tall, just the same height as or taller than the woman he's pursuing.
/r/RedPillWomen14/03/17 12:59 PM
1

Yes, my aunt. She was already 42 or something.
/r/RedPillWomen12/03/17 02:31 PM
1

I get that, it's just that some men on TRP apparently seem to attract the worst kind of women, or go look for women in the seediest bars, and then generalize from their experiences there.
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/17 04:44 PM
4

I sometimes read it, but most of it I cannot take seriously. It usually goes like 'I went to a bar and hooked up with a stripper and she turned out to be slutty, AWALT!' There's some decent insigt from the older members though. I also find it interesting that most topics here are questions for advice, and most topics there are rants, theories and reports. A nice reflection of female vs male nature :)
/r/RedPillWomen28/02/17 08:28 PM
12

Nothing to do with love, but I read one advice column on fitness that said that in order to prevent gaining weight over the holidays, you had to sneak away to the bathroom at parties to go and do some crunches and push-ups there. Eating disorder anyone?
/r/RedPillWomen25/02/17 12:50 PM
1

My SO has this group of female friends from high school (first there were other guys in the group too but they moved away so now it's just him and four girls). I have never liked it, but I know it sounds petty and I completely trust my SO, so I try to bite my tongue and let him do as he pleases. For example, he's on a weekend away with them now. But last year, one of them asked him to go on a trip abroad (I live in Europe, so not that far away) together, the two of them, for her birthday. She's …
/r/RedPillWomen18/02/17 04:49 PM
12

Are you sure you want to experiment? Because girls who want to, and even less adventurous girls, have already done it at your age. It seems a bit odd that a girl with such a libido is still a virgin. You seem to have a bit of a skewed idea of what sex is, like every guy offers a different type of sex and you have to try all the varieties. But a big part of sex is you, and since you have no experience, I don't think you'd even be able to notice or appreciate the varieties. I think you're right th…
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 08:04 PM
11

I'm sorry for asking, but is this really true? The circle-sharing? From a European perspective this sounds unbelievable.
/r/RedPillWomen14/02/17 04:16 PM
8

It's amazing how freeing it is to let go, right? It's one of the main things I learned here: trusting his judgment, giving him time and space to do it his way. Result: everything always turns out ok and I have much less stress.
/r/RedPillWomen12/02/17 05:31 PM
1

Yeah I recognize this, my SO is also a bit like this. I don't think you should despair too much, a lot of guys just want to please their girl and think that this is how they do it. I would work with gentle hints, like the 'surprise me', or agree that you take turns at planning a date. In the end, being a good date planner is not what matters in an LTR. If you like everything else about him and he's alpha enough in other domains, with some nudges from you he'll step up to the mark.
/r/RedPillWomen11/02/17 05:32 PM
1

This is also a lot easier to practice when you're young than when you're a bit older.
/r/RedPillWomen07/02/17 10:47 AM
1

Exactly! Too often I see 'working on your education and career' opposed to 'finding a man'. While they're absolutely not mutually exclusive. You can absolutely combine them, and if you ask me it's the smart thing to do. Being overweight, not feminine and sleeping around: not so much.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/17 10:06 AM
18

Haha thanks, I was also getting sick of all these babies here whining because omg they're still single and are about to hit The Wall at 22!
/r/RedPillWomen27/01/17 10:01 PM
2

Cool, thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen19/01/17 09:33 AM
1

Wow, that's a serious routine. I usually only do serum plus a hydrating cream in the morning, and at night I just cleanse because my skin is very greasy in the morning when I use night creams. But I feel like at my age I should probably step up the game a little bit. Do you really see the difference? Would you say it's worth the money? And how old are you?
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/17 04:17 PM
2

what's your ritual?
/r/RedPillWomen18/01/17 10:48 AM
20

The Wall for me feels like it's been exaggerated by bitter men as a sort of revenge fantasy. Of course you can still look great at an older age, and I know lots of women who look better at 35 than 25. That being said, 30 was around the age that I started to feel like I had to work a bit harder to keep my figure, not everthing stayed firm by itself anymore:) if you don't put in the effort, you might age more quickly.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 04:38 PM
2

I'm more or less the same. In summer I never know what to wear, I don't like the heat and everyone seems to be at a cool barbecue when I'm working. I like the fall the best.
/r/RedPillWomen17/01/17 04:31 PM
1

Wow. Yeah, you definitely made the right decision.
/r/RedPillWomen12/01/17 07:50 AM
2

Bizarre article... I think she dumped a good boyfriend and then got screwed over by an alpha dude. I don't recognize my relationship in either of the descriptions. I'm not sick with passion of euphoria, nor do I feel empty and catered for. My SO is respectful but not a doormat. This woman had some bad luck/made bad choices and now tries to generalizes it like it's a standard scenario.
/r/RedPillWomen11/01/17 08:41 PM
1

:) maybe I was a bit dramatic. Ofcourse I recovered, I don't think about it anymore and I have to admit it was probably true, I was a latebloomer and I didn't pay any attention to my looks yet, I was still very much a child at 14. But being an ugly teen does stay with you I think, because male attention never sat right with me and for a long time in my twenties I couldn't really understand that men were attracted to me. I just didn't know what to do with it. I now realize I hurt a couple of guys…
/r/RedPillWomen10/01/17 08:57 PM
2

Haha, yeah they were kids, the boys in my class. Teenage boys can be so cruel. Today I look a lot better, but I could never shake the feeling that no guy could actually be attracted to me.
/r/RedPillWomen03/01/17 09:15 PM
9

I was voted Ugliest Girl of the Year when I was 14. You don't really recover from that :)
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/17 09:24 PM
2

I'm a feminist, in the sense that I believe that women should have equal rights, that we benefit from having a more equal representation with women in politics, that women should be encouraged to develop their talents and interests in any field they choose. I also think it's better for a woman to work than to be a housewife. I don't like 3rd (or 4th?) wave feminism, because of its emphasis on pop culture, its belief we live in a rape culture, the internet mob like mentality, the belief that ther…
/r/RedPillWomen02/01/17 08:32 PM
3

There's so little you can do, except warning a bit more explictly. But even then, people like who they like. She will have to slam into a wall a couple of times more before she hopefully realizes where she's going wrong. Maybe you can advice her not so much on the guys she's dating but more on how to be a quality woman? Encouraging her to take care of herself, in her hobbies etc. Maybe she might actually get pursued by a quality guy. There's hope, though. My friend got plated twice in a row in t…
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/16 11:27 AM
21

Everyone has her own bias here from their own family situation. So do I: my mother was a housewife and it has made her very unhappy. It was good for us when we were little, but ever since I was nine or so, I wished she'd work again because it would make her happier. I firmly believe that every woman needs an identity, a role, outside of the house. I also feel like the distinction housewife vs career woman is too sharp. Most working women are not 'career women' in a suit with eighty hour jobs. My…
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/16 09:45 AM
7

Then I would say no. You shouldn't date someone you're not excited about, especially at such a young age.
/r/RedPillWomen24/12/16 09:40 AM
13

Thank you. I felt pretty comfortable on RPW until I saw this thread. Leaving your wife because she was raped? What the hell?
/r/RedPillWomen17/12/16 04:38 PM
2

I have never asked him (though I'd estimate it would be around ten), and I think he knows mine, seeing that he knows my number of boyfriends and that I nevet slept around. But I don't really care eitherway, as long as it's not outrageous. When I was younger I sometimes exaggerated my number to my friends because I was embarrassed it was so low.
/r/RedPillWomen15/12/16 07:47 PM
2

I loved 'French Children don't throw food'
/r/RedPillWomen11/12/16 02:54 PM
3

No.
/r/RedPillWomen09/12/16 02:50 PM
12

I'm curious to how this works in the US. Do you actually have this earnest talk about 'commitment'? Do you have to formally ask him if he will please stop having sex with other people? Here in Europe, if someone asks you out on a couple of dates, it's automatically assumed that you're a couple, and that you're exclusive and committed. No awkward talks. And in that situation, I think it's quite safe to have sex after a couple of weeks. Although I have to admit that I have some younger friends who…
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/16 06:02 PM
3

The thing is, 'when it feels right' often conincides with 'when you have secured commitment'. I slept with my SO after about three weeks. We never talked about commitment, because we both knew from the start that it was there, from both sides. We knew each other through our social circle, we knew we were looking for something serious and were into each other. So if you're meeting a guy off of Tinder, I think you should wait a lot longer than when you've known the guy for months. I believe that i…
/r/RedPillWomen30/11/16 05:57 PM
2

I don't think it's a red flag necessarily. Maybe the roommate really was the reason. And he took you on two actual dates right, instead of just asking you to hang out at his place? If I were you I'd give him another chance. The appropriate pace for me is probably: first date is lunch or coffee and no kiss (depending on how well you know each other already), second date is for kissing, from the third or forth you go to his or your place to go a bit further. And then I made him wait a couple of da…
/r/RedPillWomen29/11/16 08:04 PM
11

Are you the same person that has been asking this question in different forms several times? If yes: get over it, stop looking for so much validation. If no: in my experience a good guy will wait for a couple of weeks or maybe even two months, as long as he feels that you're going to do it eventually. If after 4 months you were only just kissing, I can understand he got very impatient. Sex is a very important part of a relationship, and most guys won't want to postpone this for more than one or …
/r/RedPillWomen26/11/16 11:49 AM
1

My SO sometimes calls me the Fartmonster because apparently I sometimes fart in my sleep.
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 12:20 PM
4

It sounds like you don't even like him a whole lot. If you have to describe your boyfriend with 'x, y and z are terribly wrong with him but you know he's a good person', you know something's wrong. Whatever his deal is, he sounds like way too much work. You can do better.
/r/RedPillWomen24/11/16 12:16 PM
7

I lost my virginity at 23. We were dating for about a month. I only told him afterwards that it was my first time and he laughed and said he had grossly exaggerated his experience to me as well. Honestly, this is so not a big deal. Statistics show that you are far from alone and it will most likely happen in the next couple of years. Don't go wallowing in self-pity or lose yourself in the 'oh i'm so different' attitude. Just look for a good guy, date for a couple of weeks, go one step further ev…
/r/RedPillWomen23/11/16 09:49 AM
1

I like a guy who is skinny but with some muscle underneath. Generally I love dark eyes but my guy's eyes are steelblue and I love them too. The most attractive about him is his back/ shoulders. Oh, and not too clean-shaven :)
/r/RedPillWomen23/11/16 09:43 AM
15

I'm not the type to throw 'go to therapy' at everyone, but you use very strong language like disgusted, repulsed... That and the fact that you were abused worries me that it might be hard to let these things behind you easily. I think it's a good thing that you want to leave the casual sex behind you, but as a new convert make sure you don't become to extreme in how you think about these things. You're not 'damaged'. There's nothing morally wrong with casual sex and experimenting; it's just not …
/r/RedPillWomen22/11/16 08:49 PM
16

I have a friend who 'ughs' a lot too in debates, along with eyerolling and disbelieving snorts. It comes across as arrogant and disrespectful and everyone avoids getting into a debate with her. Learn how to disagree without these condescending non-verbal signals.
/r/RedPillWomen21/11/16 10:19 AM
2

Then I would insist on meeting each others families asap. If you're so serious that you will move far away for him, you need the full support of both of your networks. Don't be afraid to tell him your demands before you make such a big step.
/r/RedPillWomen20/11/16 05:50 PM
5

Are there any plans at all about when the long-distance phase of your relationship is going to end? This seems like an impossible situation to build a sustainable LTR on, except when you're both explicitly committed to it and are working towards living closer together.
/r/RedPillWomen20/11/16 05:24 PM
1

If they 'should' go out drinking in bars alone is a matter of values and morals. But that they 'can' do it safely if they choose to is a matter of the law in a free society. No grey area there.
/r/RedPillWomen17/11/16 10:01 AM
14

The important thing is that you didn't act on that first reaction, and you replaced it with empathy. I think empathy is something you can practice. If you do this every time, and when you get to know your boyfriend better and trust even more that he has your best interest at heart, it will come more naturally. But also be empathic with yourself: it's normal that when someone you don't know very well yet have you wait for an hour and then cancels, your instant reaction is annoyance. Because usual…
/r/RedPillWomen17/11/16 09:57 AM
3

Calling any human being a waste of space shows what a disgusting mindset you have.
/r/RedPillWomen12/11/16 08:14 PM
4

Well said.
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/16 03:31 PM
5

No idea. I don't know if thinking about yourself in evolutionary terms too much is very helpful. I'm not into traditionally hot guys either, by the way, I like skinny guys, like mine. I don't care if you call him a 4 or a 6 or a 792, it's not going to stop me from breeding :). And why would marrying a guy who is not incredibly handsome be 'settling'? Someone who is not superattractive at first can become very attractive through his personality. A lot of women, myself included, only fall for look…
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/16 03:29 PM
13

First of all, that sucks. I can relate to you a little bit because I was ugly in my teens and I know it hurts to see how all the guys think you're very cool as a friend and then go for the pretty girls. But you have to admit that that's quite logical, as you're falling for handsome guys too. There are two possibilities, and they are not mutually exclusive. First one: get hotter. And I would really, really recommend you try this, because for a woman it is one of life's little pleasures to glimpse…
/r/RedPillWomen10/11/16 03:18 PM
1

I lost my virginity at 23 so I can relate. Don't despair! Latebloomers carry the prettiest flowers (or something like that :)). Don't wait for situations where guys can 'approach' you or not, just look for natural situations where you can hang out in groups and can get to know each other without much pressure. I met my first boyfriend in a language class for example. If you see someone you like, be friendly, smile a lot, give them your attention, laugh at their jokes. And do start paying attenti…
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/16 09:13 PM
3

SO bought me a sous-vide cooker and we tried some salmon in it this weekend with hollandaise sauce and cauliflower puree. It was delicious! But not for everyday weeknights, so I also made a big batch of noodles with ginger-peanutsauce, some vegetables and shrimp.
/r/RedPillWomen07/11/16 09:06 PM
2

Classic example of what happens when you get married too young.
/r/RedPillWomen04/11/16 08:35 PM
5

I don't need to get married, if only because I dread throwing a big wedding. I know I can count on my guy and we're committed. If he would ask I'd say yes, but it's not a must, it's just a nice ceremony. But SO and I want to start a family soon, so we're going to look into possible legal and financial pros and cons of marriage, but it's not a must. In my country you can also choose to 'legally cohabitate', which in most respects is a bit like being married. A lot of people of my generation do th…
/r/RedPillWomen02/11/16 09:43 PM
4

For me it was when I was dating my SO for two or three months or so, and I had a late meeting but I already let him into my apartment to wait for me. I told him I made his favourite food and it was ready for him in the fridge, and his favourite series ready on the laptop. And he looked surprised and he said 'wow, you really take care of me don't you?'. It felt like the relationship suddenly took a leap further and from then on he was also a lot more open and showing affection towards me.
/r/RedPillWomen29/10/16 10:34 AM
6

I read it too, and I liked it a lot. It reminded me of how before I met my current SO I had such a hard time opening up and really being prepared to getting to know guys. I think I never gave them a chance because I was looking for someone exactly like my ex. Now I'm happy I went through that phase because I wouldn't be with my SO otherwise, but I see a lot of friends stuck in this line of thinking, this waiting for the perfect guy who will fulfill all their desiers, the magical connection that …
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/16 07:50 PM
4

Congratulations! My tips: keep the place clean, do whatever you can without keeping score of who does what (this becomes harder the longer you live together), make sure there's always fresh food in the house, ask him what he'd like to eat and cook fresh meals for him, don't rush into changing furniture ea but give him time to process the change in his house. Give him enough time and space to himself (and take some for yourself too). I never talk about RPW to him because he'd hate it and anyway I…
/r/RedPillWomen26/10/16 12:20 PM
5

Oh, poor you. It's normal that you keep fantasizing about him if he was your one and only. But a new love will eventually erase that. It might take a while but it will get better.
/r/RedPillWomen24/10/16 09:18 PM
6

Sure, and I don't see what's so revolutionary about it. Everyone prefers to get the best possible option. Especially young people will all go for the hottest girl/guy. When they start to be more aware of their SMV, begin to appreciate other qualities in a partner etc., they will start picking 'lesser' options as well. I do think that men are no different in this respect. I know enough guys who were with a perfectly nice girl in school, but when they got a good job, had money for decent clothing …
/r/RedPillWomen22/10/16 12:11 PM
28

It's strange that you'd consider it if only there are other women here doing it. Sex is all about what you two want as a couple, not about what others do or don't do. Plus, him wanting to try that has nothing to do with being masculine or not. But if you don't want to, then don't.
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/16 02:43 PM
1

That sucks and I know how much it can hurt. But it's great that you were strong enough to break it off immediately. Stay strong, you'll find a better guy for sure.
/r/RedPillWomen04/10/16 02:39 PM
3

You say you felt out of his league. Whatever you decide, ask yourself if you're interested in him or only flattered by the attention. I have a friend who got pursued by a guy way beneath her smv. But when he started to pull away she suddenly got interested because she missed being pursued. She ended up being plated and humiliated by this a**hole and was hung up on him for a year. Only invest time and emotion in some worthy of it!
/r/RedPillWomen02/10/16 09:31 PM
1

Yes, I was incredibly anxious at first and I was sure I couldn't do it. But everything went well and it made me and our relationship stronger.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 06:54 PM
6

Pretty good! My boyfriend is coming home tomorrow after seven months abroad for work. So I'm enjoying my last evening doing exactly what I want while enormously looking forward to tomorrow :)
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 05:58 PM
4

So you're going to marry a guy who's in the marijuana business and does not care about your mental health just because you're shudder 31. Wow. Your kids are going to be so lucky. Think hard before you do this please.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 12:41 PM
23

RPW does not mean you have to blindly obey every single guy on any issue. Nor is any guy who wants to be your boyfriend automatically your 'Captain'.
/r/RedPillWomen28/09/16 12:37 PM
7

I am one of those weird people who likes bad weather better when it comes to clothing, because in summer ı'm always insecure about showing my white legs, skirt length, what shoes to combine it with... In winter I go for short skirts or dresses with opaque tights and elegant boots, with a rain proof trench coat. When it rains I wear a cape.
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/16 05:16 PM
3

Wait, aren't you also the one with a boyfriend that is disrespectful and belittling? Could that be the reason you think compliments and niceness are fake?
/r/RedPillWomen24/09/16 06:29 AM
3

Move on. He doesn't love you.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/16 09:09 PM
9

No, my friends are nice. I mean girls do give more compliments but they're not necessarily fake.
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/16 09:08 PM
1

What do you mean? Someone you're in an LTR with?
/r/RedPillWomen23/09/16 08:52 AM
1

Yeah, it can be hard to meet new guys when you're in a certain routine. But I wouldn't wait to be 'approached'; being approached for me is what happens in bars when a guy is looking for someone to sleep with. I would start with striking up a conversation in the middle of a lecture though. I mean maybe not in the middle, but afterwards or before. You can ask him about something you didn't understand, make a remark on the professor or something. Don't worry you look 'weird', because you don't. Jus…
/r/RedPillWomen22/09/16 09:26 AM
8

Maybe the minor concern is part of the problem? Be open to different types of guys. I hardly know anyone who ended up with the 'type' they had in mind.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/16 07:37 PM
7

Tough call. Maybe he's changing, maybe he isn't. The only thing you can do is let him do the pursuing, and make him wait a bit longer. Time will tell.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/16 07:33 PM
4

We have a cleaning lady half a day every two weeks. Apart from that, I guess I do more housework and all of the cooking, and he does more chores, but we both do as much as we can, mainly on the weekend. Since we both work hard, it's not our priority to have a spotless house, but he does appreciate it when I make an effort, and vice versa. I wouldn't cut back on work to have an even cleaner house. In the long run a satisfying job is more important than a superclean house, but that's just my opini…
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/16 06:27 PM
2

Can food really give you a noticably different tan? I think you'd have to eat enormous amounts of it to see any difference.
/r/RedPillWomen21/09/16 02:26 PM
1

If you're shy, maybe join a small theatre club to overcome it? Working together intensely on a play is a great way to make friends. Do you work? If not, do some volunteering. An activity involving teamwork will always be easier to make friends than something like a gym.
/r/RedPillWomen20/09/16 08:18 AM
7

And what are you going to do when he starts belittling your children?
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/16 10:19 PM
1

You think you've said something superawkward; the guy probably barely noticed. Think about it: when a friend says something weird, do you hold it against her or think she's a weirdo? No, you barely register it. A good dating tip: stop worrying about how you're coming across and focus on him!
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/16 10:12 PM
1

Advice to my 19 year old self: 'Don't be scared of guys. They're just people. You can never go wrong with being friendly. Don't underestimate the effect you have on guys. If a guy shows interest, he's interested. Your shyness can be interpreted as standoffishness so act more open. You're not as ugly as you think. Get a better haircut asap. Don't be so serious. Enjoy yourself.'
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/16 10:08 PM
2

No! You'll sound and look crazy. You have to respect his decision. It's telling that you don't even accept his reasons for the break-up but instead blame it on something that's in your control. Work on yourself, and if he ever shows any sign of interest again, then go for it. For now, leave him alone.
/r/RedPillWomen16/09/16 09:57 PM
11

If I gave two bj's in a row I don't think I could talk the next day. Are you trying to win an olympic medal, OP? Give yourself a break and do something you like after the first round! Your bf will enjoy seeing you enjoy yourself.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/16 01:09 PM
3

Yes, exactly. My mother never really got out of this pattern. To this day, she sometimes makes us kids feel responible for her happiness. I love her dearly but I wished she'd done more for herself with her talents, I think she'd been happier and we wouldn't have suffered a bit.
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/16 12:42 PM
13

Yes, but I think it's important that your mother went back to work when you were a bit older. My unpopular opinion: I think it's not very healthy for husband, wife or children when the woman is a SAHM (for too long). Children: It can be good when they're little. But after that, it's better for their independence and their sense of self when they learn that no adult exists solely for their well-being. The woman: I think everyone needs an identity outside the house and the family. The man: a worki…
/r/RedPillWomen11/09/16 11:42 AM
1

I'd go five years up or down, but not much more. I like a guy to be in the same life stage, have the same cultural references etc.
/r/RedPillWomen05/09/16 09:07 PM
2

Yeah it's difficult because I also don't want to suppress or change my personality. And I don't want to get boring either. But since I feel more feminine, I also feel more secure and I notice that I automatically make less jokes.
/r/RedPillWomen04/09/16 10:58 AM
1

I like Sarah Beth yoga on YouTube, she has a couple of challenge programs. I like the weekly program where she has a fifteen minute video for every day of the week.
/r/RedPillWomen03/09/16 01:06 PM
2

I wish I could stop being clumsy... An unfeminine behaviour that I'm trying to eliminate is the compulsive desire to make jokes, answer sarcastically and try to be funny. Seriously, I make sound effects and all that :) I guess it's from growing up with two brothers who were always joking and teasing, in combination with insecurity and trying to look smart. It took me a while to realize how that kind of behaviour comes across. So now I'm just having normal conversations with friendly answers inst…
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 05:33 PM
2

I know it's not scientific, but it's from my own personal experience. Almost all women I know, all with higher education, are happily coupled up. And it makes sense: why wouldn't a man pick an educated woman if there's so much supply? The thing is, when some of those highly educated women do stay single (which happens, some percentage of a certain populace will always stay single, that's no different from fifty years ago), they tend to look for causes and then blame it on their career, on their …
/r/RedPillWomen02/09/16 05:28 PM
8

I had a friend with a boyfriend like that. Except, which was even more heart-breaking, she didn't turn into a shrew but stayed her own sweet and loving self, thinking he would change while he gave her nothing in return. I told her so many times that he had no incentive to change, since she made life so easy for him and gave him everything he wanted. Eventually after many years she saw the light and broke up with him, but she still finds it hard to move on. So very good advice OP.
/r/RedPillWomen01/09/16 04:55 PM
9

I feel like since I adjusted my behaviour a bit, I feel better at work. I don't feel the pressure to always talk or make jokes to get noticed. I try to be sociable, feminine and friendly and I ask about my coworkers lives and how they are doing - which definitely gets noticed in a team where I'm the only woman. I pay attention to how I look and act, which definitely has advantages with clients (not saying I flirt with them, but where my coworkers are more agressive, I think my 'friendly but pers…
/r/RedPillWomen31/08/16 05:54 PM
14

I'm sorry you're in this difficult situation. I would find it very hard to stay with this man, since it sounds like he doesn't show a lot of respect for you. And respect is key to a healthy relationship. But if you have made up your mind to stay, you're right that you need a way to cope with this behaviour. You say that you apologize to him, keep giving short answers and try to avoid him. Have you tried explicitly asking him to stop talking when he rants? Something like 'You have made your point…
/r/RedPillWomen24/08/16 06:49 PM
1

I have the same thing! If I eat too many carbs at lunch I fall asleep at my desk, but without them I get hungry again very fast. Tomorrow I'm going to try a Mexican salad, with black beans, sweet potato, corn, avocado and fresh veggies. See how that works.
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/16 07:19 PM
3

Practicing self-care was perfect for me last week, since I had shingles and the doctor said I had to take extra good care of myself. So more sleeping, veggies and fruit, some yoga every day... The only thing I didn't to was meditate. I can't seem to bring myself around to trying it. It feels so unnatural to just sit down when I want to do so much other stuff. And it's not like I'm always crazy busy or never take time to think. On the train for example I have no problem just dreaming away for hal…
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/16 07:17 PM
3

Yup. And if you're a woman and you don't agree with them, it's internalized misogyny.
/r/RedPillWomen23/08/16 07:12 PM
3

This is difficult, because it's hard to say anything without knowing more about your dynamic with him. You say that he's stressed and irritable because of his move and his new job and you are having a hard time finding your way and are moody and leaning on him too much. I would say that that's an extremely normal reaction from both of you to this new and challenging situation. So I think it's a bit odd that he is already thinking of breaking up after only two moths of difficulties. Are you guys …
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/16 01:02 PM
1

I agree. Don't force yourself to be pleasant all the time. Allow your boyfriend to take care of you for now and just take it one day at a time.
/r/RedPillWomen18/08/16 09:14 AM
3

Your last point resonates with me. I also always lied and made my n-count higher to look cool and liberated. It's actually quite low. Today I'm not ashamed of that anymore.
/r/RedPillWomen17/08/16 08:49 PM
1

I never used it myself, but I have four friends who found their boyfriend on Tinder in the last year alone. All decent guys. One is alreday planning her wedding.
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/16 07:51 PM
6

So in summary, you're a woman under thirty that still looks young, has had a good education, is in a field with lots of men, and has a good insight in her strengths and weaknesses? Doesn't seem all that hopeless to me! First off, I know it is very hard, because I was single for four years in my twenties and I also found it horrible and lonely but: stay positive! Desperation chases people away. Try to take good care of your mental health by exercising, being as sociable as possible etc. Be as app…
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/16 07:37 PM
16

Canceling at the last moment, multiple times, definitely warrants a conversation. Tell him how it makes you feel and that this is not how you want the relationship to proceed. Be clear about what your boundaries are. Guys respect girls with boundaries a lot more than doormats. If the situation doesn't improve, you'll have some thinking to do. Good luck!
/r/RedPillWomen16/08/16 07:11 AM
1

Start with not buying chips or other stuff. That's easy. Otherwise, my rule is: I always eat healthy, so I don't have to feel guilty when I don't. I make sure my breakfast is healthy, my lunch has plenty of veggies, I try to exercise... and then when a friend offers me a slice of cake or I just crave some chips, I just eat it. The next day I eat healthy again.
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/16 03:46 PM
1

Injecting some red pill in your relationship does not mean changing your personality or acting like someone you're not. You're an intellectual, don't be ashamed of that! If he asks for your opinion, just give it, calmly and friendly. I don't see how this can be interpreted as inciting an argument. Say something like: 'Exactly this problem came up in our group and what we did was...' or 'What you write makes sense, but if you look at it from field x, your analysis would probably gain from...' Wha…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/16 03:18 PM
6

It depends on when you find your man and how the rest of your life is going. I think if you're both on the same page and ready to settle, then before 25 can work. But I've seen it so many times now: in your early twenties there's still so much you want to do, you're growing and evolving so much, that not everyone manages to grow in the same direction. I mean, your brain hasn't even matured fully before age 25! Statistics show this very clearly: couples who have married young are more likely to g…
/r/RedPillWomen15/08/16 02:58 PM
3

Haha, I kind of recognize this. I want to be very RPW and praize and support my boyfriend and all that. But the other day on Skype (he's working abroad for a while) he said: 'you know, everyone's very nice here, but I miss how you can just laugh at my face sometimes and help me take myself not too seriously, cause I need that.' Goes to show that guys sometimes love us for very different reasons than we imagine :)
/r/RedPillWives20/05/16 11:19 PM
5

Very true. And also: most guys don't WANT perfection. They want a human being that has weaknesses just as he has weaknesses.
/r/RedPillWives18/05/16 09:50 PM
1

Then don't have sex without being in a relationship. With a good man, this won't be any problem at all. He'll ask you out, again and again, and each time you can go a bit further (a good man will respect the time you need). I usually have sex after about three weeks/a month of dating. If they're really interested they can wait a couple of weeks, if they only want to sleep with you they won't wait that long. I think it must be harder to tell if you live in the US, though. Here in Europe when a gu…
/r/RedPillWomen17/05/16 09:50 AM
0

I don't know. When I met my boyfriend, he was in a relationship. He eventually broke up with her to start dating me (he never cheated, by the way, and I didn't seduce him or anything). It's not impossible that he really likes you and is thinking about what to do with his feelings. On the other hand, my bf never talked badly about his then-gf, and hasn't done so ever since. It doesn't seem very manly and I agree that when guys do that, it's usually because they want to sleep with you.
/r/RedPillWomen15/05/16 10:32 AM
1

I don't know how to fix this, I wish I would. My boyfriend is in the process of buying a motor cycle - I'm afraid I will never be worryfree again :(
/r/RedPillWives12/05/16 05:42 PM
5

No previous commitment to me is a bigger red flag than one or two previous commitments. A 35-year-old who's had a lot of flirts but no serious relationship? No way. If it's very high, I would be cautious, but it doesn't really matter to me. I was my first boyfriend's first experience, and it was mine too, which made it special. But my current boyfriend has had several partners before me, and I don't mind. We met when he was 28, I would have found it a turn-off if he had still be a virgin. It dep…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/16 04:44 PM
10

I was single for a long time and often got these questions. My advice would be to not react offended ('I'm not interested' or 'well how's your relationship going'), but not desperately either ('I can't find anyone!'). Just be honest but upbeat about it ('I'm not sure, I do hope a nice guy will ask me out soon'). That way you're letting people know you're interested and open to date. Because if guys tell you you're pretty but no one asks you out, maybe you come off as a bit aloof or you're not gi…
/r/RedPillWomen12/05/16 11:11 AM
2

Guys have a tendency to insult each other in jest, and I really like it when a guy is able to laugh at himself and then insult the other one back. But if a guy is really being a jerk... if he's below you girls will probably see that too and don't think a lot less of you. But if you let him insult you too much without saying anything, you might look a bit weak, yes. I wouldn't overreact either, cause that looks like you care too much, but maybe just say 'Dude...' with a raised eyebrow to show you…
/r/RedPillWomen03/04/16 08:03 PM
2

No bows head in shame
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/16 11:11 PM
6

I'm going to give an unsatisfactory answer here, but doesn't that depend a lot on the taste of the guy and the life phase he's in?
/r/RedPillWomen22/03/16 06:46 AM
7

Very good advice and something I have to work on a lot. It's very tempting, when you have a bf with a strong character, to lean on him a lot with all your worries and stresses. But sometimes it's enough just to lean on him being there, instead of venting and loading it all on him.
/r/RedPillWomen20/03/16 07:01 PM
2

Ofcourse it is hard to judge based on your description alone, but if he doesn't initiate any contact, that's a red flag for me. And the fact that he broke up with you with a 'you're great blahblah' bullshit explanation and only comes back when you demand less commitment? I've seen it happen with friends, and it never ends well. Feeling like an arrow is lodged in your chest? A good man would never give you that feeling. A good man initiates contact and doesn't mind if you ask him for confirmation…
/r/RedPillWomen05/03/16 06:17 PM
5

Evan Marc Katz's blog is pretty good... but I doubt that any blog can change a marriage dynamic if she's not interested in it in the first place
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/16 07:06 PM
1

Why is asking about your sex life alpha? He sounds more like a jerk. And even is he is 'alpha', not every woman is going to be attracted to every alpha, let alone want a relationship with him. I've known more than one alpha type guy who at first would catch my attention because he's masculine, cool etc, but then turned out to be rude, cocky, obnoxious too. I don't fall for that. There are plenty of great guys who are losers nor assholes.
/r/RedPillWomen03/03/16 07:02 PM
12

I know the feeling, but I wouldn't worry too much. There's nothing wrong with how you are. I'm sure they notice your efforts and appreciate your questions and your cooking. Thank God for quiet people, there are enough loud ones already :)
/r/RedPillWomen21/02/16 02:44 PM
1

Yes, I'm planning one visit, maybe in July, if I have saved enough by then. What's your improvement project?
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/16 09:18 AM
2

I love dogs, I'm definitely going to look into this!
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/16 09:16 AM
3

Wow, being seperated is already hard enough but if you're husband is in a war zone it has to be so much more difficult. That deployment cycle is really enlightening by the way, thanks.
/r/RedPillWomen20/02/16 09:15 AM
2

Shooting, that's a good suggestion :) I did it once and liked it a lot. 'In the grand scheme of things, this is nothing' - I guess I needed to hear this. All my friends are like 'wow, I could never do that' and 'how are you going to survive this???' You RPW's are obviously used to more :) Thanks for the suggestions!
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/16 09:49 PM
2

Yes, that's what I've been thinking. I could turn this into some kind of female monk mode and just do all the things I've been wanting to do to improve myself and never got around to. Thanks!
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/16 09:46 PM
1

I know, I have to learn how to be alone. It's mainly that I get scared, actually. I know it's embarassing, I'm just afraid of the noises, intruders, that kind of think. We live in an old house that's a bit remote and I have a lively imagination :) But you're right, I have to be more excited for him, I just couldn't bring myself to it. I did tell him I'm proud of him, but I have played the guilt card a couple of times. Not good, I know. And the result is, I think, that we're both feeling more alo…
/r/RedPillWomen19/02/16 09:44 PM
3

Lurking for about a year I think, on an off. I don't really remember how I got here, I just like to read about relationships and kept on clicking I guess. The main thing I learned here is to see things from my boyfriend's perspective more. Being more giving, more understanding and appreciating the things he's doing and why. Looking at things from a man's perspective, thinking about what they want, what they really want, is hard in the beginning, but you get used to it and it pays off I think. I …
/r/RedPillWomen05/02/16 10:00 PM
3

Every Sunday after running I scrub my face with a scrub glove and then put some honey on it, let it sit for ten minutes, then rinse off - and my bf always notices how supersoft and glowy my skin is.
/r/RedPillWomen30/01/16 01:46 PM
1

When you move back in with your parents as an adult, you're bound to see their marriage through a different lens. Unfortunately, anyone who's ever tried to change their parents or their habits has learned: you can't. You're the child and you'll always be the child. You can't do anything to fix a marriage that has had its own dynamics for decades. Just lead your own life according to your own values, that's all you can do.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/16 11:20 AM
1

He quietly loves me. He doesn't make big declarations, but he supports me in every way. He would rather I leave him alone at night but still lets me fall asleep in his arms because it makes me feel protected. He's smart and driven. His boss told me I'm lucky to have him. He makes me laugh. He makes my life better. He has a lot of friends so I meet lots of new people, he teaches me how to relax instead of always doing stuff and being perfectionist.
/r/RedPillWomen29/01/16 10:14 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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