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MrsManglesBangles Archive

View 1 posts and 70 comments by MrsManglesBangles on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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3

Amazing response. A little curious why you're on a divorced men's subreddit?
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/26 08:41 PM
2

Same for me. UK, 45M. Amicable Split last Feb, no kids. hope to get consent order final soon but finding it difficult to bite the bullet and take the financial hit. Happy to chat.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/26 10:25 PM
1

Ha, good idea. I had a swim after work today (UK). Even up I was swimming through a fair amount of seaweed... It then got me thinking how my ex would have freaked, and maybe that's something to put on a dating profile when I'm ready... Willing to be a bit adventurous and/or swim through seaweed. 😅
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/26 09:06 PM
5

Poignant post mate which I totally relate with. Sadly the old world is gone and hopefully time to embrace the new times (easily said). Getting out, exercising, hobby groups, good food, a few self help books, leaning on friends and family for chats and support have helped so far. I'm optimistic about the future for both you and I. Hoping we'll look back at this transition period as something that was needed to heal before going onto something better. 🙏🏼
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/26 02:57 PM
3

Nice one mate. Congratulations. I'm haven't yet gone on a date but feel I'm on the cusp although my hearts not that into the idea. Could be because I'm enjoying my independence again, the idea of having a relationship has lost its sheen or I haven't met the right woman yet. It does feel different though, at 40+ I feel the thrill is lessened and it's a somewhat guarded compatibility assessment after the difficult times during a break up for me anyway.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/26 09:10 PM
1

Great to hear man.
/r/Divorce_Men29/05/26 11:36 AM
2

Have you got decent photos? There was a YouTube vid a while back showing how much more likes a guy got by getting professional photos.. I'll see if I can link it
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/26 07:44 AM
2

Fair enough. I just ate a nice dinner at a restaurant solo which makes me think of it (currently travelling with work). I didn't however pluck up the courage to head into one of the many packed bars though. Could've done with a quiet stool to sit chill tbh
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/26 12:12 AM
9

Feeling for you dude. It'll happen. Probably when you least expect it. Less of the self criticism though. There's no such thing as a loser. It's a good excuse to treat yourself instead.
/r/Divorce_Men24/05/26 12:02 AM
1

Good to hear... Did you put things on hold while unemployed or proceed with the divorce? I think our option wait and see or, more likely is to just sell the house and I rent while looking for a new job.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 04:12 PM
2

Really great advice mate, thanks for sharing. I'm a year separated, soon to be divorced, 45 now, ex was first and only partner, 23+ years ago. I've since done some therapy (might go back to another soon), been getting active and seeing a PT for this last year, bought some new threads, and also found a really great barber and increased how often I get a cut/ beard trim. Hobby wise I joined a surf club, yoga, go to gigs, volunteer, picking up other old hobbies I'd dropped over the years. I'm still…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/26 03:09 PM
1

Too true. Thanks
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 06:06 PM
1

Interested to hear what you mean by new boundaries? As in love yourself first and your partner second?
/r/Divorce_Men26/03/26 05:49 PM
1

I think it's opening up to new social hobbies and activities. I started to get into surfing and luckily a local surf school opened up and hold monthly socials. It's been a great way to join a new, mixed gender, social group. I've been to a couple of gigs for band/DJ that were popular when I was younger and the crowd were similar age and the DJ was on in the late afternoon/, evening (day rave) which suited the older crowd...I didn't get to chat to any women (unlike surfing) but it felt like there…
/r/Divorce_Men15/03/26 12:18 PM
2

I was going to say something similar, I'm enjoying my single life, separated over a year now, still married and working out the last stages of divorce. Since the breakup, i don't look at women the same way I used to currently, like a veil has been lifted and I'm not sure I want/need the complication or dynamic a women offers. Despite this, I still find myself scanning a room or checking them out subconsciously. I'm looking to give myself time to settle and discovery life before I dedicate energy…
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 01:24 PM
2

Nicely put
/r/Divorce_Men02/03/26 09:43 PM
3

I'm looking to keep the house but a bit painful that I have to get a mortgage bigger than when we first got it 10 years ago. Upkeep is a bit of a hassle but finding my stride with it.
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 08:38 PM
1

I'm down that way, Worthing way. 1yr separated, she moved out a couple of weeks ago. No kids, amicable(ISH)... Things went cold, no longer enjoyed each others company, no real animosity or affairs (afaik). 6 weeks until we can submit the consent order but need to get the finances written down etc. A few ups and downs but I've a good set of friends and chatting to other blokes in similar situations (via yoga, surf club near Chichester). The cohabitation phase was awkward and pleased that's over (…
/r/Divorce_Men25/02/26 02:39 PM
1

Yeah, I wouldn't recommend it. Socially is much better... I pretty much stopped entirely in the early days and now I'm on a more even keel, I have a few occasionally sociably but even after a couple of pints I notice the low the next or so. Each day as it comes mate, things will most certainly heal with time. If you're feeling really low, please speak to someone, you can DM me if you need to talk things though it won't be a quick response a) I dont have notifications on b) I'm in the UK.
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 10:57 PM
1

Sending you support mate. You sound like a solid father, going through a difficult time while keeping the family together, no wonder your daughters are singing your praises. I'm not in as difficult a scenario as you but a wave hit me when I got blind drunk, was hungover, home alone. The fact that you recognise you're understandably hitting a low point shows you're emotionally intelligent and hopefully you can see it's onwards and upwards from here buddy. It's strange, for me, I get intrusive tho…
/r/Divorce_Men23/02/26 11:59 AM
2

Similar story here... I treated myself to some nice speakers, sub and amp and found it helps fill the void when the house feels too quiet. That and picking up surfing, yoga, volunteering gets me out of the house, as well as reconnecting with friends.
/r/Divorce_Men19/02/26 08:48 PM
1

I'm in the UK, I was the earner, no kids and not sure if this is the best way to do it but... * She is looking to buy a flat and be mortgage free using half our house plus my half savings ignoring pension, company stocks * I spoke with a family lawyer/solicitor early on who confirmed the starting ground is 50:50 but something different can be agreed. * I've been transparent with her that this is the case she has said pension isnt hers. * Using AI it seems we need to ensure the judge would confir…
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/26 12:33 PM
8

You've gone too deep bud... She just wanted a link for something you may have. She kept the email cordial without emotion so nothing to misinterpret. Whether you email it or not,or ignore entirely, are valid responses and you should simply move on and put her out of the picture again.
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/26 10:24 AM
2

This is the pill I've been trying to swallow, the finances I've been working hard to give us a good life are going. I think I'm coming to terms with it though (we separated Feb last year, hoping to finalise divorce and agree financial split April). I'll be getting a bigger mortgage than when we bought the house 13 years ago. She'll be going mortgage free in a flat, I'll keep the house (maybe... that may change when she speaks to a solicitor). My plan moving forward is to spend more of my wealth …
/r/Divorce_Men17/02/26 04:27 PM
1

The "he's gay" slur always feels an odd one, I mean, can't that also be spun/joked into a reflection of the wife. I.e. she was such a bad wife that it turned you off the entire gender 😅. Agree with the other comments though that taking the moral high ground and not rising to the bait is best
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/26 05:06 PM
1

If they care then it's not meant to be, their loss. Divorces aren't uncommon, you should be able to find someone who understands the complexity of relationships and life and sometimes things don't work out.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/26 01:44 PM
1

How about you u/Black_Eagl?
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 12:30 PM
5

Well, my STBXW moved out this weekend with our beloved the cat but I'm feeling ok with it all. Priority for me now is to see if we can get it financial order and mortgage sorted before End of march when my next bonus comes through so need to get going with the admin side of things (which is all a bit overwhelming). The week ahead are a couple of personal trainer sessions, cook some more nice food later in the week (did a batch cook yesterday), yoga, buy a surf board (my new happy place hobby, me…
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 12:27 PM
1

There's also an associated NMMNG journaling book by Chuck Chapman which I've been finding helpful.
/r/Divorce_Men02/02/26 09:52 AM
1

This isn't a recommendation by any means (more a warning) but I found the hangover/downer after drinking alcohol has caused my to cry a couple of times whereas outside of that I have my emotions pretty much in check (varying from melancholy to happy!). A common theme in this sub is to limit/stop alcohol and drugs, hit the gym and for me that's been great advice.
/r/Divorce_Men29/01/26 04:37 PM
3

Can you elaborate? I'm not really following what your message is.
/r/Divorce_Men22/01/26 11:32 AM
1

Sorry to hear that mate. 😔 I like what the other commenter said, to try and get out rather than fester. My separation started a year ago, maybe even longer as we both checked out so I'm in a bit of a different place. I ended up listening to music a lot (I had Djo The Crux Duluxe on repeat as it's about breakup), going for walks and just getting out of the house.
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 08:41 PM
2

I'm doing similar distractions to you but also looking for social contact & connections. I joined a local volunteering group (GoodGym in the UK) and through that started going a personal trainer who not only helps me keep motivated to exercise but she also "gee's me up" during the workout and I leave feeling good. We talk about the divorce, plans etc and I've found it to be a boost. I've also invested in some decent speakers (KEF LS50 Meta's, will soon get a sub) so can zone out listening to mus…
/r/Divorce_Men15/01/26 05:50 PM
1

I feel that simply can't be true mate although I totally get where you're coming from as I sometimes struggle with low self esteem and confidence. Have you thought about speaking to a therapist about your concerns. Something that I found hopeful when I was feeling socially anxious was instead of using self checkout at the supermarket, approaching the cashier and making small talk and practicing friendly confident interactions without any intentions for more then that. Then build upon it. Instead…
/r/Divorce_Men13/01/26 02:21 PM
1

Sounds like you've been in a tough situation mate... 15years, Christ on a bike, I'm coming up to 1 year of separation and am eager to get assets split (waiting for divorce to come through before financial agreement) but without kids makes it easier to do. I'm not sure looking at "lost rent" is going to help the situation now. As your kids were staying there you've provided for them as father which is a positive thing. Sounds like you've gone through the courts etc. and have been granted full own…
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/25 07:51 AM
2

I haven't used these but pretty sure they're apps where you fill in a "style quiz" and they send you a box of clothes to try. You then send back the items you don't want.
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/25 06:44 PM
1

You sound like a good man and a caring father. Easily said but you can't change the past so try not to dwell on time lost. That's just the path you needed to take. Sounds like you tried to keep the family together and accommodate your wife's needs more than most but you can hold your head high knowing you tried to keep things together. Time will help things pass but going forward focus on the relationship with your daughter, be healthy (eat, sleep and exercise well). Pickup a new hobby. Wishing …
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/25 06:38 AM
1

Although I'm separated and co-habiting so suspect loneliness it's to come whacking on favorite songs helps fill the quiet when she's out partying and socializing. I've treated myself to a new stereo, KEF Meta 2 speakers and a Wiim ultra amp, subwoofer next. Looks like you're already doing exercise (what dancing are you doing?) but I'm hoping mountain biking will be a good outlet. Quite a few biking groups in the UK, usually male so going to join that.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/25 06:27 AM
2

You totally have enough time for kids at 37. I reckon the dads here will attest that it's not an easy road having kids but rewarding for sure. I suspect I have missed the boat (44M) although I'm happy in my own space (I play the fun Uncle role well :D) and will see what happens.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/25 06:19 AM
1

Totally agree!I get a feel good for a couple of days after. Could do with a few more crisp sunny days (UK)!
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/25 09:49 AM
2

V similar here, new MTB, lifting, and been picking up my Teenage Engineering EP-133 and Roland S-1 more. Getting a Bass again is on my list. 👍🏼
/r/Divorce_Men12/12/25 09:47 AM
2

Just bought a new MTB, also hoping to get out surfing more.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/25 10:38 AM
2

This is a good idea. I do yoga. 10 women 3 divorced dudes ( incl me although not yet final) 😂 I joined due to a bad back, really enjoyed the vibes.
/r/Divorce_Men27/11/25 05:01 PM
2

Glad you posted this sir, I've had similar concerns/thoughts. Sounds like you have already decided to have an open chat with your buddy which is what I was going to say, another thought was maybe think of possible solutions or alternatives that would help him out... Could you train someone else or have a mate you know who'd be able to cover instead? Your health is upmost and you've a very valid reason for but being about to. I'm 44, amicable split, co-habiting (UK)while waiting for divorce to go…
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/25 10:52 PM
1

Similar-ish situation here, we still care for each other but the attraction went. We're amicably living together in our house (no kids), we still occasionally cook and eat dinner together or watch a bit of telly. i've filed for divorce which should go through in Feb, hoping the financial side of things won't be too painful as we're on opposite ends of earning spectrum. It shouldn't be too bad judging by what she's said but I know she's looking to be able to buy a decent flat outright one we sell…
/r/Divorce_Men02/11/25 11:06 AM
2

Nice post mate. Thanks. It's nice to read about amicability rather than animosity. Similar here, we, 44M / 53F lost the spark. No kids, divorcing in Feb, house to split, she's said shes ok to keep accounts separate although there's quite a big wealth disparity as I've been career focused). We still care for each other ...we're in a housemates stage but had a sit down meal this evening... but we also want to start our next chapter. It hasn't been easy but we both feel we'd both be happier apart a…
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/25 05:21 PM
9

Like the other comment... I see nothing at all to be embarrassed about. In fact, it hit the harder and you've turned it around. Hopefully you can feel pride in how you've developed. For me, before this year, breakup/ divorce was just a word as I hadn't had a break up before. I now see it as a life changing trauma and resetting of ones identity (followed by discovery). I'm glad the "system" worked for you and, sure there's probably some regret there, but it's what you needed and how the old you w…
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/25 11:05 AM
3

I'm in a similar boat, living with STBXW until divorce goes through in Feb. We're amicable and it was a mutual separation as there was/is no spark (no kids). Exactly the same thoughts as you, what is she doing, who's she chatting to etc. but I feel that's normal... There's concern and care there for our ex wives. I'd rather not know so looking forward to selling the house although expect that will bring with it it's own challenges. As others have said, you didn't mess things up, things haven't w…
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/25 11:46 AM
3

Any tips on how you managed people treating you poorly, are you getting treated better?
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/25 09:45 PM
2

Sorry man, that's rough. You'll need time to adjust and find yourself again but you will most certainly be better off! We were together 20 years and married for just over a year before we split. Not sure if it was the marriage, menopause, mid life or other things that changed but it is what it is. Look after yourself, eat well, limit drink, no drugs, exercise often and try and keep your composure in front of her. Don't let this turn you bitter but make you even better. Sending you support!
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/25 09:05 AM
2

Same position as me... Looking to sell the house in Feb when the divorce comes through. I find it confusing, we're still amicable, no kids, so still have that how was your day chat but I'm concerned it'll get worse for me when we do sell. Although it will be nice to not know that she is out till 4am with her new circle of friends thought. :/
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/25 08:53 AM
2

Hey mate, what do you mean by getting back to zero? Not heard that phrase before.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/25 08:46 AM
1

Is going to a therapist or a Dr an option for you? Maybe start making yourself the pet project and find an effectiveness you connect with? I relate to a lot you've said.. early 40s, together 20yrs, married only 2, in process of separating, no kids for us though. I used to run a lot, was dedicated to work I however have often felt numb (even before separation, more now) , I also don't have projects, more float along, I suspect due to undiagnosed neuro divergence but also an age thing, I'm more co…
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/25 06:39 AM
2

Sounds amazing!
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/25 07:16 AM
2

Just to add. I'm in a similar space as you in terms of still analysing what went wrong but I see it more as reflections and learnings rather than guilt (feels healthier that way) I could have spent more time and money on us and I can't change that now. Onwards and upwards.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 01:04 PM
1

I've similar feelings, my STBXW said in Aug she's no longer attracted to me. The two therapy sessions didn't change that and she wanted to separate up figure out her feelings, we basically both got comfortable and checked out I think. No kids and not the strain of a miscarriage.. This isn't on you though, it takes two people to forge a relationship, my feeling tis that our communication wasn't right, we bickered but never resolved issues (chores and finance mainly). It sounds like you are/we're …
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 01:00 PM
3

Lots of good advice here, not much to say other than you've got this mate, find your true self without ties to a partner, it's difficult to see right now but there are positives. What you've had has now changed, you sound like a top bloke who's coming to terms with the changes and I'm sure you will do well regardless.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/25 09:47 AM
1

Do you have a plans on how to separate? We're in this weird "flatmate" stage until next year then plan to sell the house and she gets half savings (no kids but hoping to keep not pension).
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/25 10:26 PM
2

Our second anniversary is tomorrow (been together 20y+). I just submitted the divorce application today. We're still living together and get along but feelings towards each are gone. Weird times.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/25 10:12 PM
1

Great to hear mate. Sounds like a better truer you is (has) emerging! 🔥🔥🔥
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/25 04:16 PM
1

Ha, yeah, this was just to get an Initial structure/idea of what we may need. I'm planning to send it to my solicitor to formalise
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 03:21 PM
2

Good work, I've been cutting down for a while, my STBXW hasn't which may have contributed to how things have gone (we're not big drinkers by any means but she's more social and pubs and pints are pretty entrenched in the UK culture). .. I'm having no/low alc now which works.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 12:10 PM
2

I've just asked ChatGPT to draft a seperation agreement which I'll go through with her later today, to then pass to solicitor later to make further during the divorce proceedings I can share what's generated if that's helpful although just recommend ChatGPT in general to help with guide for you to tailor. I'm hoping we'll keep it amicable and agree won't go after half my pension if I give half of house and savings as I'm breadwinner (no kids) but we'll see. 🫣
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 12:02 PM
2

Ooh great idea. I'm off to Salt Lake City again later this year, might get some ski lessons in. 👌🏼
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 11:55 AM
3

Great reply. Totally agree with the drinking. I recently had a binge session with a mate and the hangover and depressing emotions afterwards hit me like a train. 4 days to get back in control and not be mopey. I think it's an age thing where my liver and buddy has made it clear that it no longer wants a large amount of toxin in my bloodstream. Much happier without in the long run, even with the FOMO during the evening.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 06:14 AM
2

Yeah, I've been working in this for a while even before the marriage breakdown as I occasionally travelled with work. I'm getting more comfortable with it although still feel quite insular and out of place... My hope is to become more carefree with it, really enjoyed a solo trip to the cinema this weekend and the little interactions with the staff.
/r/Divorce_Men26/08/25 06:09 AM
2

In the same boat as you bud a couple of months further on perhaps, sans kids. As other comments have said it's time to look out for yourself. It's a little weird at first going solo but I went for lots of walks, phoned mates, went to a couple of gigs solo just to get out of the house really. The sadness and thoughts are a little invasive but try make it transactional with your spouse and put a vineer on the outside. It's fine to be sad as it's a sad time but have a purpose about you, get things …
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/25 04:54 PM
2

I'm not sure you are expected to be "happy" on your own mate, moreso content with who you are and are willing to look out for yourself and feelings. Having climbed the career ladder, money behind you, articulate and self reflecting sounds like you've solid attributes to be a father and settle if that's what you're looking for. Not a too dissimilar situation to me, early in 20y beginning seperation, no kids, biological clock is ticking (44m). Hopeful on what the future holds ... a lot can change …
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/25 08:00 PM
2

I agree... Toxic masculinity causing men to think it's not ok to feel emotions isn't helpful. OP, you're going through a big change and your mind and body will take time to heal. Sounds like your ex has revealed her true self and your blinkers are off. You're hardly halfway though your adult life so still plenty of time to mend and move on mate.
/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 04:24 PM
7

Onwards and upwards mate
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 09:44 PM
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