| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 908 | So sad how men have devolved (and women think it is ok) | #JustLVMThings | Possible-Wedding | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 02:30 AM |
| 46 | What things do you do to love/nurture yourself that empowers you to feel that you are awesome all on your own? | MINDSET SHIFT | Possible-Wedding | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 03:36 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 26 | So sad how men have devolved (and women think it is ok)I agree with this. I have had consistent conversations with older men in my family of that era who are appalled by current men’s behaviour and that they have “no values”. I don’t think it is fair to paint every single man with the same LV brush - and I think this is the point he is making. He isn’t suggested the “good old days” were amazing for women all the time. He is pointing out that men have lost all sense of a need to even both engaging. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 09:09 AM |
| 13 | We should all be like this!!!!Yeah I’m glad you said this - I love my friends but I’m not getting out of bed to go bust him. If she is that suspicious of him she shouldn’t be with him. I feel that is totally enabling. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/09/20 01:14 AM |
| 2 | Article: Are Dating Apps a Breeding Ground for Dark Personalities? New research suggests that the answer is likely yes.That’s so interesting. I too have met pretty much nothing but low life’s...but the more confidant I get the less I am interested in OLD. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 11:59 AM |
| 9 | Tips to stop yourself from texting him firstHahaha I do that too!! I used to just screenshot the nice ones and then realised I was going about it the whole wrong way 😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 10:14 AM |
| 1 | This reminded me of all you wonderful ladies.. keep being queens! 👸💐Yassss! This is my new favourite thing to do to spoil myself. I get such great pleasure from looking at them in my clean apartment!!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/09/20 02:38 AM |
| 6 | I joined this subreddit not because I'm looking for a HVM, but because this is a safe space for women calling men out on their bullshit unapologetically.I was suggested to join this sub after posting about yet another bullshit thing my ex had done. Boom we’re done! All this empowered sis vibe calling out men on their shit allowed me to do something that I hadn’t been about to do for 2 whole years. So yeah guys, listen up close. We see you and all your bullshit games and every day another woman takes her life into her hands and kicks you to the curb like the trash you are. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 12:35 PM |
| 18 | Because marriage it's a torture, of course. Way to ruin happy marriage photosWell I cut him off over a week ago and I am feeling it get stronger each day. No doubt he will find a girlfriend (some pickmeisha) and I know what she will be in for. But NMFP. This forum has certainly helped. Also trying very hard not be to so harsh on myself for allowing it - a work in progress! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 12:00 PM |
| 30 | Because marriage it's a torture, of course. Way to ruin happy marriage photosThis was my ex ‘situation’ to a tee. He desperately wanted to have a meaningful relationship but was an avoidant who had never dealt with his shit and constantly talked about how “glad he was that he wasn’t in a relationship because how “suffocating” they were”. And he is nearly 40 and he sees how everyone around him is getting their shit together. He also said to me “I should probably get a girlfriend”. Yes, this was to me while we were sleeping together. Can’t believe I allowed that to happen … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/09/20 04:01 AM |
| 14 | The pictures you post are inconsiderate, the problem is definitely not the pornsickness I possessThe last straw in my relationship was exactly this. He sent me the Instagram account of this girl who poses pretty much in nothing but knickers under the guise of “these dudes pay for top less pics of her” and then I saw he followed her AND liked her pics (he often doesn’t even like mine) and I snapped. Sad pathetic POS. When I lost it he claimed that he followed her because she has “worked with some photographers I know”. Sure dude, they are all taken in her living room. Just like men bought Pl… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 08:48 AM |
| 11 | Personal responsibility comes into play when weeding out and keeping out the losers.Yessss!!!!! This is me right now. 2 year abusive relationship ended and not only have I cut ties but also with that girl who allowed every one of her non existent boundaries get broken. Feels really good moving forward to now start practising these things mention on FDS | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 08/09/20 03:09 AM |
| 6 | LIARS CLUB: Isn’t it incredible how easy they lie? It’s literally like breathing- thank you to the sis at the car dealership who worked with me to catch a CHEATERYou and me both! When I took it to my therapist and said something along those lines she calmly looked me in the eye and said “he’s a psychopath”. And when you look up the definition is it absolutely that, no empathy, compulsive lying, risk taking, fabricating reality. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 05:33 AM |
| 7 | LIARS CLUB: Isn’t it incredible how easy they lie? It’s literally like breathing- thank you to the sis at the car dealership who worked with me to catch a CHEATERI am only too aware of the relief and freedom you are feeling now. I dated a complete narcissist and was constantly waking from the anxiety. He was living with his ex while they finalised the sale of their apartment - I was regularly over at their place and they were in separate rooms etc... but she was never there - he was big on PDA never any sense of hiding out in public / at their local pub etc.. After a while I started to wonder why I wasn’t meeting any of his friends...I went overseas for … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/09/20 01:15 AM |
| 6 | What things do you do to love/nurture yourself that empowers you to feel that you are awesome all on your own?I am currently reading this with a cup of tea in one hand, a pastry in the other (my weekend treat) in my clean apartment with a tasty stew on the stove!!! But I love that idea of connecting with your friends / mum - I am going to subscribe to this organic gardening magazine she has been wanting to get - so great idea - thank you ☺️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/09/20 06:54 AM |
| 3 | What were your biggest lightbulb moments from dates/ relationships that went wrong? For example, small things you easily overlooked in the beginning but in retrospect you realise were warning signs he was manipulative? Lets discuss!I got the same but was “stop being a mum”. Motherf**cker YOU asked ME to pick you up. How about you just say thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 09:11 AM |
| 4 | What were your biggest lightbulb moments from dates/ relationships that went wrong? For example, small things you easily overlooked in the beginning but in retrospect you realise were warning signs he was manipulative? Lets discuss!I hear you. Put up with a guy like this for 2 years because he was so damn hot. I spent most of it feeling like I wasn’t good enough for him and it only was recently I realised I am too good for him. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 09:09 AM |
| 3 | What were your biggest lightbulb moments from dates/ relationships that went wrong? For example, small things you easily overlooked in the beginning but in retrospect you realise were warning signs he was manipulative? Lets discuss!Damn yes!! He said “I either have someone who will let me get away with stuff and I will get bored or someone who will call me out on my shit”. Seriously? You can’t do both of those damn things yourself? And yes, he had serious issues of enmeshment with his mother. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 09:03 AM |
| 7 | I love my therapistOh honey I’ve done all of this and more!! Don’t feel bad that you have because you are leveling up. The important thing is you are taking responsibility for change. No shame. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 06:43 AM |
| 21 | Little boys man.... like what???But he didn’t even write “thicc” he wrote “thick” so I thought he was calling her stupid 😂😂 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:52 AM |
| 16 | Little boys man.... like what???Yep I matched with a guy who then tracked me down via Instagram and started the conversation with “hi gorgeous”. No thank you. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:50 AM |
| 3 | Feeling frisky? Get laid by yourself Queen! A thread on some sex toys that will rock your world, teach you about your body, and give you the confidence (and strength) to abstain from the abundance of low value dick options that will use their eloquent words and tricks to try to access your body.Yeah I have found that. If I use a vibrator on my clit regularly so let’s say every day I did find I started to need a higher level of stimulation in sex/oral and it took me longer to orgasm. So I only use my hands now and can come in a few minutes and only use vibrator for internal stimulation. But that might be I’m a little sensitive. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:47 AM |
| 6 | And todays catch of the day ladies! Red flag central with a generous serving of emotional baggageI’m so glad you were laughing 😂 I’m thinking anyone else finding that specificity hilarious? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:43 AM |
| 8 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?This is my new activity to practice because I am terrible at this. I have let soooo many instances of shitty comments slide in order the be the “cool girl” who isn’t “insecure” and then one day the straw breaks and I go bananas. I now am aiming to shut that shit down ASAP. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:40 AM |
| 8 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?Yesss!!!! I have so often thought “maybe he doesn’t realise” and then combine that with good old gaslighting and you start to think maybe you were wrong and it was an innocent mistake 🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:38 AM |
| 9 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?I experienced that this week. Articulated my feelings and got “fair enough” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:36 AM |
| 11 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?So many - but for me the most powerful has been that I don’t need a man to live an amazing fulfilled life. I feel that has released me from a prison of accepting less than HVM because I’m afraid to be “single” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:35 AM |
| 4 | What’s your favourite FDS principle?Yep - the old me got rejected by a guy I was seeing who only wanted something casual and I rang him up the next day and had sex with him. Literally rewarded him for rejecting me 🤦🏻♀️ | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:34 AM |
| 16 | Let’s talk about more CODES on OLDOh my god - my ex prided himself on his dark and sarcastic humour and he was so emotionally abusive. I realised his sarcasm was a “jokey” way of being a really nasty person | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:28 AM |
| 1 | So many girls be like🤣🤣Lmfao | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:17 AM |
| 6 | “I just don’t feel like I’m good enough for you”I think we dated the same dude 🤣 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:14 AM |
| 9 | “I just don’t feel like I’m good enough for you”After a weekend away... Me “did you miss me”? Him: “no” Me: “you’re so withholding” Him” maybe it’s the truth” Me: totally reasonable to spend another year invested in this piece of shit. Looking back I can’t believe I stayed for so long. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:13 AM |
| 11 | “I just don’t feel like I’m good enough for you”Ha! I did the EXACT same thing. Totally took it as a compliment that he thought I was amazing. He even asked me “do you think I would make a good boyfriend?” 🤦🏻♀️the fact he even needed to ask that.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:09 AM |
| 19 | “I just don’t feel like I’m good enough for you”Yep - this was my situation. Super early on he said “you deserve better than me” and naively believed that this would result in him stepping up his game. Instead he behaved badly so many times and took him back every time. And there was something inferred like “you knew I was like this”. God I cringe at how much bs I put up with. I remember a friend saying early on- when someone shows you a side, believe it. I didn’t want to. Hard lesson learned. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 05:07 AM |
| 13 | Truth. We are not responsible for fixing or changing men!The sobering truth. I have just left this situation and I KNOW this was where it was heading. Feeling a little wobbly today (it’s only been a week since the end) but reading this sub has once again reaffirmed that I am doing the right thing. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/09/20 04:57 AM |
| 5 | This. This is what I am working on with myself at the moment. Trying to get to the bottom of why I accepted what I did. Ladies it’s very useful to look inwards and see what is going on internally! Why are we allowing subpar shitty behaviour or traits?Yep. Alcoholic depressant father. I date LVM because the hot cold behaviour is familiar and if I can “just get this guy to commit” I can prove I am worthy of love. Lots of therapy... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/09/20 04:13 AM |
| 9 | Monday Vibes: 👸I just left a 2 yr relationship where I was always treated as an option. Feels so good to say “no more”. 💪🏻 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/09/20 12:16 PM |
| 7 | 32 and was ready to hang up my hatOmg what a sad-ass loser to feel the need to DM. No doubt he cranks in the corner every day wishing that he could get a woman “for reals”. How’s that blow up doll working for you?! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/08/20 11:40 AM |
| 4 | Big factsMe too. 18 months in a situationship and I crafted these clear paragraphs about what I felt and needed and got “fair enough” 😂 that’s it. The fact you need to have these “conversations” is a general indication that they aren’t being met in the general course of conversation or engagement. He too had a history or trauma and so often I felt like a bloody therapist. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 10:45 PM |
| 5 | Attachment styles are really important to take note of in yourself and the men you dateOh yes well there are definitely way more insecure attachments floating around the OLD pool. So in that sense it is absolute luck - I guess I meant if you stay around even when red flags are present. But hey I know nothing about you so that was just a theory. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 07:22 AM |
| 16 | Attachment styles are really important to take note of in yourself and the men you dateI mean this in a nice way but it isn’t “bad luck” you are attracting these avoidants. You actively seek and respond to them because they activate your anxious attachment style. It feels familiar - without wanting to make too many projections I suspect you probably had inconsistent care giving as a child (emotionally or physically). I’m not suggesting you enjoy pursuing avoidants - it’s hell, but there is a part of you that is replaying early dynamics. I have been exactly the same- emotionally ab… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 04:21 AM |
| 2 | I wrote this last fall while I was dating an emotionally abusive asshole, but didn’t have FDS in my life. The first of many notes I wrote about our shitty relationship.Totally. I have no doubt I will become another one of those “crazy bitches” he has spoken about who have “hurt him” and made him the avoidant, manipulative asshole he is today 🙄🙄 | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/08/20 03:24 AM |
| 2 | What are the little red flags you look back on and realize you should have paid more attention to?Amazing! Good on you. Yes...the last 24 hours has been quite the epiphany!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 08:09 PM |
| 1 | What are the little red flags you look back on and realize you should have paid more attention to?I hear you sis! I’m 37 and can’t get over the number of man child’s out there. It is an epidemic. I second guessed myself and rationalised shitty behaviour and even got to a point where I wouldn’t tell my friends because I couldn’t deal with the looks on their faces. (Hello denial my friend). Well steel capped boots in the balls when that next happens for me! The sad thing is is I have accepted behaviour like this in 3 different relationships so clearly my self esteem feel i deserve no better. W… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 08:06 PM |
| 4 | It’s not okay for your man to be liking other women’s sexy pics.Yeah well now that I am stepping back and looking at the situation I can see many instances where he has behaved like that. Very early on I remember him showing me (possibly the same model) the morning after we had had sex and me being blindsighted given I was more vulnerable having had just been intimate. Looking back it was such a move to knock me off balance so he had all the power. And there have been many instances, always to do with my breasts because they are so small - like he sacrifices… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 08:01 PM |
| 3 | How to stop being insecure about introducing guys to my pretty friend?Totally agree-was thinking the same thing | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 12:40 PM |
| 2 | What are the little red flags you look back on and realize you should have paid more attention to?How funny when we look back and go what??? The second date he was so uninterested and monosyllabic you would have thought I have begged him to see me. I feel so sad that girl didn’t get off the stool and walk the fuck out. Instead I stayed and stayed for another 2 years enduring hot cold behaviour, comments that wore down my self esteem, verbal abuse, manipulation. Never again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 12:33 PM |
| 3 | What are the little red flags you look back on and realize you should have paid more attention to?Funny you put it like that. After experiencing total douchebag behaviour I am feeling so angry and shame that I wasted 2 years on this total fuckwad. But I have learned so much about myself, my triggers, my needs, my less than desirable behaviours. So yes, time to raise the standards, he can fuck off and my revenge shall be being my awesome self which he will never have the pleasure of holding close again. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 12:29 PM |
| 8 | It’s not okay for your man to be liking other women’s sexy pics.Yeah and you know what? I would never ever do that because I would feel it was a shitty unnecessary thing to do. I have to say it has been quite confronting to realise just how bad the behaviour is and even more confronting to see how I have been putting up with it. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 09:40 AM |
| 3 | I wrote this last fall while I was dating an emotionally abusive asshole, but didn’t have FDS in my life. The first of many notes I wrote about our shitty relationship.Omg this is me right now. I love this Cockholm syndrome 😂😂it’s so true! I was thinking this morning after a shitty episode (that brought me to reddit) that a) I feel like I can’t break the ‘spell’ and b) I have so many notes about how shitty he has made me feel. Well it stops fucking now. Love this xxx | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 05:56 AM |
| 1 | At the first sign of disrespect, nip it in the bud.I am quietly dying inside when I make a list of all the most disrespectful things he has said to me...and that was in the beginning.... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 05:47 AM |
| 25 | It’s not okay for your man to be liking other women’s sexy pics.So mine follows this Instagram model who is super curvy (im very slim and are not blessed with her curves) and sends me her feed to tell me how “sad dudes pay her money to see her topless” and I then looked and saw he follows her!!! He said “of course I do” I told him he was no different but cheaper. Left me feeling so insecure and crap. What a fucking hypocrite | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 05:45 AM |
| 17 | It’s not okay for your man to be liking other women’s sexy pics.Yep I have had a bit of an eye opener today as well. I actually posted because I thought I was being “insecure”. But in reality it is shitty shitty behaviour | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/08/20 05:42 AM |
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