| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 40 | Divorce almost finalized! | Spousal Support / Alimony | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 04:00 PM |
| 27 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage. | Spousal Support / Alimony | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 09:22 PM |
| 27 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit? | Rant | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/03/25 11:48 PM |
| 16 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyers | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 30/11/24 11:24 PM | |
| 12 | Telling friends and colleagues about pending divorce finalization | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/24 07:29 PM | |
| 11 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce). | Dealing with the Ex / STBX | Regular_Finish7409 | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 01:02 PM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 5 | STBX is upset that I am expecting her to fileI agree with other comments… just go ahead and file but make sure you’ve got your ducks in a row beforehand, particularly finances, home ownership and occupancy, savings/retirement accounts and so forth. Once you file and it’s submitted to the court certain legal things begin to get initiated. But at the end of the day, regardless of who files she’ll paint you as the problem and her as the victim. Guaranteed. | /r/Divorce_Men | 15/11/25 07:44 PM |
| 9 | LostYou’ve come to the right place. There are tons of fellow travelers on this sub that can offer very sage advice. | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/04/25 12:06 AM |
| 5 | LostSorry to hear this mate. Sounds like a very tough time. So much to unpack here. Have either of you filed for divorce? Is there any clarity as to what her motivations were and what her end goal was when she moved to her parent’s house? | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/04/25 12:05 AM |
| 1 | Wife filed… but is acting weirdProbably worth the shot. I wish you the best. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/04/25 10:13 AM |
| 1 | Wife filed… but is acting weirdEither see a counselor and try to repair things (both of you have to be waiting to repair it and willing to do the hard work) or accept the reality of divorce in spite of you not wanting it and move on. Sad but that’s the reality. IMHO. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/04/25 11:15 AM |
| 6 | Is my ex copying me out of jealousy?I wouldn’t worry about it. Who cares. Things are over anyway. Move on with life and ignore the things she does. Not worth taking up space rent free in your brain. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/04/25 11:07 AM |
| 2 | How long did your divorce take?Nine months for me. | /r/Divorce_Men | 26/03/25 02:23 PM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/03/25 09:48 PM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks man! | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/25 02:30 PM |
| 2 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Great advice. Thanks. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/25 02:30 PM |
| 2 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/25 02:30 PM |
| 2 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks for the advice. Reassuring knowing I’m not the only one feeling like I failed. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/25 02:29 PM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks for sharing. Good luck with everything. Sounds like it’s been tough during those five years. Hang in there | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/03/25 02:28 PM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks for your thoughts. I can relate to a lot of what you went through. I’m happy for you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 09:56 AM |
| 2 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks. Great to hear your pain has receded. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 09:54 AM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks!! | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 05:40 AM |
| 3 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Right on the money. Hit the nail on the head. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 05:39 AM |
| 2 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Not a big age difference. It’s definitely rare I assume. But was a long time in the making. Essentially living the “ married single life “ in the sense we were two ships passing in the night for a very long time. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 05:39 AM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Wow. So true! I can definitely relate. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 05:37 AM |
| 1 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thank you man! This is so helpful. Really appreciate your thoughts. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 05:36 AM |
| 5 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thank you so much for these words of wisdom and consolation. Really helps. | /r/Divorce_Men | 07/03/25 12:22 AM |
| 5 | Divorce is finalized today, which she instigated seven months ago, but why do I feel like shit?Thanks. Much appreciated. | /r/Divorce_Men | 06/03/25 11:58 PM |
| 1 | Divorce almost finalized!Thanks. I needed this this morning! | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/02/25 03:26 PM |
| 1 | This Marcus Aurelius quote is helping me- maybe it will help youLove this! | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/02/25 06:46 PM |
| 8 | Who all is spending Valentine’s Day alone?Hang in there. Things will get better and you’ll find happiness and thrive in a new way that may be unclear to you now. Stay positive and hopeful. Don’t dwell on the negative. IMHO. Cheers. | /r/Divorce_Men | 14/02/25 04:19 PM |
| 6 | She finally signedCongrats man! | /r/Divorce_Men | 03/02/25 02:48 PM |
| 3 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Oh boy. So what did you do? | /r/Divorce_Men | 02/02/25 03:31 AM |
| 1 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Thank you for your thoughts. Really helpful! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 08:40 PM |
| 5 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Thanks everyone for your thoughts and comments and insights. Super helpful. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:36 PM |
| 3 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Truth | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:35 PM |
| 3 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Kids are all grown adults. So they do their own thing. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:34 PM |
| 0 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).I’m in agreement but very hard for me to do this! I’m a people pleaser trying to learn new habits! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:33 PM |
| 1 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Good point! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:32 PM |
| 2 | How did you handle your ex’s birthday every year (during and after divorce).Great points. Thanks for your input. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/02/25 03:30 PM |
| 1 | Divorce timelineTotally agree. That was my situation for awhile too. Endless discovery on her part and attorneys never seemed to really make much of an effort to bring things to closure. My attorney was definitely in my court but both seem to enjoy the billable b hours!! | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/01/25 02:52 PM |
| 2 | Divorce almost finalized!Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 19/01/25 01:11 AM |
| 3 | Divorce almost finalized!Very interesting insights. I think your experiences will be similar to what mine will be. I’ll gladly participate and communicate when needed. And be civil and kind but I don’t really want much of a relationship with her going forward. I think it will be too triggering for me. I wish you and your family the best going forward. B | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 10:33 PM |
| 6 | Divorce almost finalized!Very similar to me… I am glad to pay more now versus having to pay her something every month. I’m glad I’ll be free and clear…. I have grown kids and grandchildren as well. How have you navigated all that - possible family functions like weddings or birthday milestones etc? I’m hoping she can be civil but I’m not convinced. It’s just not her nature. But all in all I have great relationships with the children and I enjoy spending time with them! Cheers! | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 09:57 PM |
| 2 | Divorce almost finalized!Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 07:25 PM |
| 1 | Divorce almost finalized!I’m semi retired now so going to do some of my hobbies more, a bit of travel, and volunteering my time. Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 07:25 PM |
| 3 | Divorce almost finalized!Very similar to me! I’m semi retired and I know she was under some false ideas from her friends and such that her payout would be significant over a long period. It was all very strange. | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 07:24 PM |
| 2 | Divorce almost finalized!Good advice. I do remain hopeful all will go as agreed but knowing her and her antics she could easily pull something like what you describe. Thanks! | /r/Divorce_Men | 18/01/25 07:11 PM |
| 3 | Didn’t want the divorce/ blessing in disguiseHappy for you! | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/01/25 04:30 PM |
| 1 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Thank you everyone for your thoughts and insights! Very helpful. | /r/Divorce_Men | 05/01/25 10:10 PM |
| 1 | Telling friends and colleagues about pending divorce finalizationThis is very helpful. Thank you. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/24 10:58 PM |
| 3 | Telling friends and colleagues about pending divorce finalizationThanks for your thoughts. Super helpful. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/12/24 02:05 AM |
| 3 | Telling friends and colleagues about pending divorce finalizationThanks! That is what I’m thinking as well. Can I ask you a question though. What then do you say to people that might casually say things like “how’s your wife and kids” etc. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/24 08:03 PM |
| 3 | Telling friends and colleagues about pending divorce finalizationThanks for your thoughts! Much appreciated. | /r/Divorce_Men | 08/12/24 07:45 PM |
| 4 | Almost 10 years later and life isn’t good.Hang in there man. This sounds like a tough situation. But I always believe things can and will get better. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 03:01 AM |
| 4 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersThis is super helpful. Thanks so much. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:31 AM |
| 5 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersYes for sure. Unfortunately she led with divorce and we’ve each been working with our separate attorneys the last five/six month negotiating the divorce etc. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:24 AM |
| 3 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersPossible. But I doubt it in her case. I think maybe the finality of a divorce finally set in. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:22 AM |
| 6 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersYes. I agree. To file and then proceed for five months with everything revolving around a divorce and then changing direction just seems weird to me. Like there’s def some hidden motive. | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:08 AM |
| 7 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersYes. Exactly. Wondering the same things! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:06 AM |
| 3 | Wife filed for divorce and now wants me to consider a legal separation instead after 4 months of back and forth between lawyersThat’s what I think too. She’s getting heat from her own siblings or friends or even our grown children. Divorce all of the sudden, one initiated by her, maybe isn’t as good of a path as she originally thought. And yes. Cutting ties seems to make the most sense. Thanks for your thoughts! | /r/Divorce_Men | 01/12/24 12:05 AM |
| 2 | Admitting you got divorced because of a dead bedroomTotally understand. Zero intimacy or even a little affection | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/11/24 07:32 PM |
| 7 | What are you doing for Thanksgiving with your kids?Great question. This is my first Thanksgiving divorced. Not entirely sure what will happen. Added to the drama is the fact the grown children don’t seem to know what to do. | /r/Divorce_Men | 13/11/24 04:24 AM |
| 1 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Thanks so much for your and thoughtful insights!! | /r/Divorce_Men | 12/11/24 10:00 PM |
| 2 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.I’m kind of wondering the same thing? Thanks for your thoughts. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 06:25 PM |
| 3 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.She had 100% freedom to work outside the home. We chose to live off my pay so she could raise the children. Although she did freelance work during our marriage. But not employment where she’d receive benefits and provide contributions to social security and so forth. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 05:00 PM |
| 3 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Yes. She’s entitled to social security. She’s a couple of years older than me and has been receiving some benefits for a couple of years. She didn’t work much during the marriage so it’s rather low amount. Jets should go up significantly when I begin receiving my benefits. I think basically she’ll receive equal to half of what I’ll be receiving. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 04:58 PM |
| 2 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Hopefully there are brighter days ahead. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 02:35 PM |
| 1 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.You are right! I’m most concerned about the amount spousal support/maintenance will be. I want to retire but I’m think the court can possibly mandate I continue to work for a longer period of time? Send insane but who knows. NY State is so unfriendly to men in divorce. | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 02:35 PM |
| 2 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Good point! | /r/Divorce_Men | 10/11/24 02:32 PM |
| 8 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Wow. Thanks for your personal insights. Very much appreciated | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 11:36 PM |
| 5 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Sorry to hear about your father’s first wife. I hope you’re right about protecting men about to retire. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 11:34 PM |
| 6 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.This is great advice and a great way to look at it. Thanks. | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 10:10 PM |
| 9 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Thanks for your honesty! | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 09:56 PM |
| 6 | 66 year old man. Wife divorcing me after 40 years of marriage.Shit. That’s sobering! | /r/Divorce_Men | 09/11/24 09:55 PM |
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