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Retying3043 Archive

View 4 posts and 257 comments by Retying3043 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Eh… I don’t understand the pressure to “date.” You’ll be just fine alone if you want to. Otherwise, just do it and stop worrying about it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 12:53 AM
5

It’s just something they do. Many of us have been through it. Look up the light switch effect. It’s bewildering, but you will be ok.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 12:47 AM
2

You are not responsible for a child who is not biologically yours.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/26 12:38 AM
2

It sucks, but they all do this shit. You have to keep it together. While she’s out fucking around, you work on a the divorce settlement that is in your favor.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 08:58 PM
-1

I disagree. Not your DNA, not your kid, not your problem.
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/26 08:26 PM
3

I decided it was time when she specifically asked for divorce. We (I) had tried enerything up until that point and I was just done as well. I was relieved she asked. The idea of divorce was scary to me. But it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I encourage every man in a miserable relationship to get divorced. Traditional families are dead. Let that shit go. Your life waits for you on the other side of divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/26 10:31 PM
4

I would never depend on another person for income. The burden of performance rests solely on you. It sucks, but that’s how it is. She’s never going to hold down a job, as she never has held down a job.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/26 05:49 PM
2

It takes two to make it work. She’s admitted she stopped trying, so there’s no point in you continuing to try. Get the divorce. Get organized and file first, that way you have the upper hand.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 03:28 AM
20

Get the divorce. If you go back, you can count on: 1. She will treat you like shit, as she doesn’t respect you 2. She will cheat again 3. She’s buying time to ultimately divorce you in the future. I know this is scary. Be brave. You must see this through.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/26 03:20 AM
3

Parallel parenting. Zero communication for any reason unless it’s a critical issue related to the kid.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 11:05 PM
8

She’s buying time. The relationship is over, keep strong and get the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/26 10:42 PM
7

Get the divorce. The relationship is over.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 03:16 AM
1

I agree with this. Figure out what you want from her. If it’s casual, it doesn’t matter. If you want something serious, move on, she’s trash.
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/26 03:14 AM
3

I don’t think this is entirely accurate.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/26 02:30 AM
4

No way. Time Machine would be my way out. Give me the Time Machine.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/26 01:22 AM
1

(Assets + Liabilities) / 2 = what you each get Although, it’s a fairly short marriage, so you should each walk out with close to what you brought in. Doesn’t matter that you’ve been together since 2019. Her student loans really aren’t part of the negotiation. She’s going to have to walk away with those.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 08:04 PM
5

Get a court order that all communication goes through Our Family Wizard. Block her on all other forms of communication.
/r/Divorce_Men03/04/26 01:30 PM
0

That’s incorrect. Sperm-jacking is very legal.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/03/26 06:32 PM
6

Most divorced guys have a bro mindset and define themselves by the attention that women give them. There is nothing wrong with being single and enjoying your freedom.
/r/Divorce_Men14/03/26 06:26 PM
8

I’ll bite - You will have no problem finding men to have sex with you. You will have difficulty finding a quality man to commit to you. Good luck out there.
/r/Divorce_Men15/02/26 09:46 PM
4

Why do you feel like you have to date?
/r/Divorce_Men18/12/25 02:32 PM
4

They all want to stay in the house. LOOK: you’re getting divorced. House gets SOLD, and the proceeds are split 50:50. Find an apartment in your kids’ school district.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/25 12:32 AM
2

What do you gain by keeping the pictures?
/r/Divorce_Men14/12/25 12:06 AM
12

Did you look up the outcomes of couples therapy? It doesn’t work. If you’re in the therapists office, the relationship is over. Usually it’s just one party, buying time, and gathering intel to use against you during the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/25 11:27 PM
2

Regret, hell no. Wish I would’ve gotten it sooner.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/25 06:08 PM
13

The biggest thing I learned in my divorce is that I am not responsible for another person. Not their behavior, desire, attraction, the way they treat me, the way they respond to me. My opinion and experience is that once things get to this point, it’s over. The sooner you get out, the sooner you can rebuild. The longer you wait, the more you will lose, and the less time you will have to rebuild.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 01:02 AM
12

You’re obviously not splitting over “dishes.” There are deeper issues. None of which you can fix. The relationship has run its course.
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/25 12:50 AM
10

Real talk here man, you are getting PLAYED. She’s not your wife any more and you owe her NOTHING. Stop the “what’s fair” talk, it’s all business from here on out. The following is reasonable: Both parties work, so there is no need for alimony. Anything acquired during the marriage is split 50/50. The house gets SOLD and the proceeds split. No cohabitating. Each party gets a car. Child support is calculated by the state calculator, and is NOT part of the negotiation. Each party keeps whatever the…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/25 11:54 PM
2

Good luck with that. Duluth model = any 911 call, the man gets hauled away.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 11:42 PM
2

How would they make sure the kid actually wore the tracking device?
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 02:08 AM
1

Get outta here 👎
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 02:04 AM
1

Get outta here 👎
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 02:04 AM
1

Get outta here 👎
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/25 02:03 AM
3

Then they were never your friends to begin with.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/25 01:47 PM
2

Ultimatums are a no-go Once the word “divorce” is spoken, the relationship is over. Say you cave and get her pregnant. Do you think that will stop the divorce threats? What happens when there is something else she wants? My advice: get the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/25 09:47 PM
7

I’m not sure it’s something you “overcome.” You had a traumatic experience, and your mind/body is saying that you need time away from women. There is nothing wrong with that. As time passes, those feelings will subside, and you will be open to intimacy with a woman again.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/25 02:22 PM
6

First time for me was 3 years after divorce. It was a one night stand that I wasn’t expecting. She was 10 years younger than me. I was nervous, but I wasn’t about to pass up a shot like that. My body worked just fine and we fucked for 3 hours. It was great. This was on the spot, with no medication. If you’re worried, get some cialis. You can take 5mg per day and it will give you some peace of mind.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 07:59 PM
22

I can’t relate. After divorce, I lost all attraction to the ex. Someone treating me that shitty is a major turn off. I don’t care how attractive they are. For practical advice: remember there is always more to the story. You know what she is like behind closed doors, and the hell she is likely putting the new man through. 10/10 with new boobs isn’t worth the any of that.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/25 04:14 PM
5

My opinion: A lot of this is groupthink or hive-mind. They see it on social media and regurgitate it without using critical thinking. The other cases of this are purely projection. They are narcissists or some form of cluster-b themselves. In my case, ex definitely has cluster-b traits if not full blown personality-disordered. The satisfying thing is that my children have absolutely noticed this and we are beginning to talk about it. This is without prompting from me. There is value in maintaini…
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/25 04:35 PM
4

It’s better to be alone than be in a toxic relationship. Please learn how to be alone.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/25 11:50 PM
10

My opinion is just get the divorce. The relationship will never be the same. Years can be wasted trying to “make it work,” when it may be better to just move on.
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/25 07:18 PM
12

It will be easy for you to find men to have sex with. It will be very difficult to find a quality man to commit to you.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/25 08:46 PM
2

You don’t give her jack shit until you have a signed divorce agreement outlining how things will be split.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/25 06:02 PM
1

Why are you looking through his phone?
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/25 05:59 PM
4

Eh he and your ex did you a favor.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/25 05:42 PM
16

It’s definitely NOT “… and maybe she’ll notice.” You work on yourself for YOU.
/r/Divorce_Men25/08/25 06:10 PM
14

No kids, no house = simple divorce. The issues you have now will only get worse. Leaving is scary. Staying is scarier. You’re in a good position. Get out now and rebuild your life. You have time.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 05:21 PM
1

It’s not going to get better. Get out now, or accept that this is the way it’s going to be.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/25 02:54 PM
1

BPD
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/25 05:37 PM
0

Awful advice. Don’t listen to this.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 06:12 PM
8

Good advice. Applicable to divorce. Also applicable to every day life. Don’t ever show that you care.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/25 06:10 PM
3

She did you a massive favor. No kids = you can cut ties and move on completely.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/25 11:53 PM
10

She’s only being sweet to buy herself time. Divorce has been spoken. It’s over. See it through.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/25 03:56 AM
1

Consider yourself lucky you don’t have kids. Don’t have kids. It’s a fucking nightmare raising kids in the modern world. Get a vasectomy. Be wild and free. Live life for you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/25 01:22 AM
3

You’re right. It’s surreal.
/r/Divorce_Men13/05/25 08:10 PM
2

It’s petty. We agreed amicably and it’s nice to just move on. You’re right, this too shall pass, just like it did the first time.
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/25 06:57 PM
2

She gave me primary custody and I didn’t want to fight her for CS
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/25 06:56 PM
13

I tried taking the high road for a bit. It’s BS. If the kids bring lies into your home from the ex, it’s ok to set them straight. The key is to do it skillfully, rather than getting defensive.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/25 04:45 AM
7

Once a relationship gets to this point, it’s over. Move on and don’t look back. You’re in the right here.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/25 04:15 AM
7

If it goes to trial, it will likely be very skewed in her favor because she is a SAHM. Cali > 10 year marriage = lifetime alimony. Your best bet is to remain amicable and work out a settlement with her. You will still pay out the nose, but probably not as bad as if it went to court. Not from Cali, but I understand a “Gavron Warning” is important to have in your divorce decree. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 11:06 PM
3

If you can deal with her directly, just negotiate alimony = $0.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/25 05:26 AM
2

Excellent post.
/r/Divorce_Men07/03/25 06:37 PM
–

(Assets - liabilities) / 2 = fair
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/24 05:55 PM
1

I’ve never heard it said like that. I like it and totally agree. Renting from the bank, the city, and Home Depot/Lowe’s (maintenance). And you’re right, even if it’s paid off, if you don’t pay your city rent(taxes) you lose your home.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/24 02:11 AM
4

I reprioritized my spending and downsized my life; my lifestyle doesn’t reflect my income. I value cash flow and savings more than anything else, so that’s how I run my finances. I don’t really have a lot of fancy things, and I do not own a house. Renting is way cheaper, regardless of what anyone tries to say. The first few years were tight. I stripped by budget down to the bare minimum to stay in the black, and held on until things improved. It took 2-3 years to gain momentum again. That said: …
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/24 03:18 PM
1

Hahahaha, no.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 06:50 PM
5

Familiarity breeds contempt b
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 10:40 PM
1

Radio silence unless it’s an issue with the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 12:40 AM
3

Any chance you can get the kids back into public school and get her working? Right now you are in a terrible situation. She has all the leverage because she is homeschooling and isn’t working, plus there are 5 kids. She’s almost guaranteed full custody for 5 kids which means you’re going to get destroyed with child support. Alimony as well because she’s not working. If possible pump the breaks and get her back to work and the kids in school.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/24 04:30 PM
5

Yeah bro you are in a great position. GET THE DIVORCE. Things will not get better, and you’re able to get out unscathed. Go for it.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 12:51 PM
5

It’s over. Once divorce is spoken of there is no going back. File and gtfo. The more time you waste, the worse things will get.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 12:22 AM
3

For my fellow Metal Heads: I Prevail - Hurricane, Let me be sad Fit for a King - Fracture Windwaker - Get out Sakoya - Wandering Currents - Monsters Five Finger Death Punch - Inside Out Mudvayne - Happy?
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 02:59 AM
2

I wouldn’t be too intimidated by this. Child support can be changed after your divorce is final. It is based on your parenting plan. If you can get a parenting plan that says 50:50, or greater parenting time for you, then you can take it to child support enforcement and have them readjust ex’s income. Another example: women try this all the time. They agree to the father paying $0 child support in exchange for something else. Maybe they go for more alimony or more of the marital estate. But it’s…
/r/Divorce_Men08/06/24 12:12 AM
2

Solid post
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/24 03:17 PM
8

Lawyer up immediately.
/r/Divorce_Men19/04/24 06:46 PM
6

No. Would never have gotten married and never will get married again. Traditional family is the best setting to raise kids. However, the current laws destroy families and enslave men by incentivizing divorce. Literally, the law rewards women with money when they get divorced. The laws need to change before I would ever get married or have a relationship with a woman ever again. Consent, domestic violence, custody, divorce laws all need to change. As the laws currently stand, men are being lead b…
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/24 04:14 PM
2

What do you believe that dating is going to do for you?
/r/Divorce_Men18/02/24 04:23 AM
1

It’s the schedule of cases at the courthouse.
/r/Divorce_Men16/02/24 05:24 PM
15

If she isn’t negotiating then set a trial date. The anxiety of an impending trial does wonders to focus the mind on negotiations.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 09:59 PM
3

Couples counseling is a waste of time and money. If you are in couples counseling, the relationship is over. It is typically used as a tactic to buy time while preparing for divorce. It is also used as a means to gather additional information to be used against you in divorce. Couples counseling is an attempt to negotiate the terms of the relationship. For the man entering counseling, he usually wants try to restore the genuine desire his wife once had for him. Pro Tip: Genuine desire cannot be …
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/24 04:16 PM
6

Both parties work and can support themselves with their respective incomes, therefore alimony is unnecessary.
/r/Divorce_Men02/01/24 03:19 AM
2

I agree with OP. Long walks are a better suggestion.
/r/Divorce_Men31/12/23 10:19 PM
3

1) She has shown you who she really is. 2) People don’t change.
/r/Divorce_Men30/12/23 01:56 PM
1

Read a few threads over at r/stepparents. Should crystallize the feelings you have.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/23 11:12 PM
11

Agree. Stop taking the calls. Let the ex figure things out with the kid. If she can’t handle it then kid can stay with you.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/23 03:23 PM
53

She is screwing with you to buy herself time. It’s over. Get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:07 PM
7

It’s only amicable as long as you agree to the terms she wants. Once you begin standing up for yourself, amicable goes out the window. Get your own lawyer and prepare for the process.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/23 06:05 PM
1

File for divorce File for exclusive use of the marital home File to have the children returned to the marital home. Hire a PI to locate the mother and children.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 12:39 AM
6

Yes. If a woman is around other divorced/divorcing women, she is statistically more likely to get divorced herself.
/r/Divorce_Men06/12/23 12:21 AM
1

Biggest RP of your life
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/23 03:13 AM
10

This isn’t about “running away.” This is about refusing to participate in a broken system that is designed to exploit and enslave men.
/r/Divorce_Men02/12/23 11:34 PM
9

Go to your county court’s website and find the docket. Search for family court cases. Go through the past 2 years and look for the top 5 lawyers whose names appear the most. These will be the lawyers with the most experience and the least amount of fear going to court.
/r/Divorce_Men28/11/23 01:38 AM
3

Remember: you can always pay, but you can never discipline.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 08:32 PM
1

Check out r/stepparents. After you read that for a while you may reconsider things.
/r/Divorce_Men26/11/23 07:26 PM
1

Mediation is typically pointless unless you have a trial date set.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/23 03:52 AM
13

What do you hope to gain from bringing it up? You know what needs to be done. Do it quietly.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 03:56 AM
11

(Assets - Liabilities) / 2 50:50 custody. Child support is set by state calculator. No alimony because you both are gainfully employed. That is your hill to die on. Do not listen to anything the other side has to say. They are lies and empty threats.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/23 03:49 AM
16

With regard to marriage or finding a significant other, you are correct — there is no point. We have been sold a fantasy, and it’s brutal to get smacked in the face with reality. Relationships are transactional and they ALL have an expiration date. If you are saying “what’s the point” with regard to your life, don’t go off the deep end because it’s not worth it. Many men have been where you are and know your pain. As time passes, things will get better. Hang in there.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/23 09:43 PM
3

Sorry you are going through this. I know it is bewildering. Look up the light switch effect. Also look up the war brides phenomenon. In addition, check out Briffaults Law - “what have you done for me lately?” Know that women are driven by feelings first. They use their feelings to create a narrative. The narrative is their truth. In your case, she is done with the marriage. So she has a host of feelings relating to being done with marriage. This is the basis for her narrative. She will create a …
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/23 03:09 PM
5

She already had it planned, and was looking for something to build a narrative on.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 11:55 PM
1

I am afraid you may not understand what stoicism is about.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:20 PM
2

Don’t worry about a shopping spree until your divorce is finalized. Anything you buy now is considered marital property and you could end up losing it or having to pay half the value to your ex. Do implement financial austerity. Open your own accounts and credit cards. Close all joint accounts and credit cards. Put all the money from joint accounts into your accounts. Drop the second job and get your income as low as possible. Implement a strict budget.
/r/Divorce_Men10/11/23 05:15 PM
2

No kids, similar income, and short marriage works in your favor for amicable divorce. (Assets - liabilities) / 2 = what each party gets. No alimony because short marriage and similar incomes. Period. This isn’t the 1950’s, and you don’t need to pay her alimony because of your respective genders. Beware: some people are only “amicable” as long as they are getting everything they want. Once there is disagreement, amicability goes out the window. That being said, make sure you retain your own lawye…
/r/Divorce_Men09/11/23 12:13 AM
19

I think you had a chance to see female nature for what it is. It’s impossible to “unsee”.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/23 03:28 AM
15

+1 female own group preference. Sorry you are going through this.
/r/Divorce_Men06/11/23 03:26 AM
3

What is the problem with being single?
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 11:27 PM
2

Sorry you are going through this. You are doing the right things. Stick with it. As time passes it will get better. The key is time.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 02:49 AM
2

It’s ok. And it’s actually good news. It’s good that she works. After you divorce, you will likely have more money than you realize, because YOU will be managing it.
/r/Divorce_Men31/10/23 02:42 AM
3

Practice makes perfect. Loneliness is a skill to master. Initially it can be painful. Welcome and accept the unpleasant feelings. Eventually they will pass. You will get used to it. You may actually enjoy being alone.
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 10:23 PM
3

If you have a spouse that works and one kid, you are not broke. Likely your finances are being mismanaged due to your wife. Does she contribute financially? Or is it the typical arrangement where the money you earn is “ours”, and the money she earns is “hers”?
/r/Divorce_Men29/10/23 06:27 PM
4

I am sorry you are going through this. It sucks.
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/23 04:10 PM
1

Taxes. Going married filing jointly to single = pay more taxes. Child support comes out after tax. Alimony comes out after tax.
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/23 02:43 AM
1

Not sure what the laws in Canada are. I would check with your lawyer to be sure. In my area, child support can be reviewed periodically. Alimony can also be “revisited” if there is not a provision to prevent it. So be very careful. They can keep hitting you up for more money as your income increases. If there is a provision to prevent “revisiting” or “increases”, get that put in your divorce decree. Check with your lawyer to see what is possible. Live a modest lifestyle. Don’t post on social med…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/23 11:20 PM
4

I earn similar income to you and have 3 kids as well. Even with 50/50 custody, I take home 1/3 of my income. Can’t buy a house, live modestly. As a high earner you have a massive target on your back. Attempts will be made to milk every last dollar you have. It’s possible to end up in debt after the divorce is over due to lawyer fees (yours AND hers). Earn a lot = pay a lot.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/23 10:13 PM
5

Men’s divorce forum Read “The List”
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/23 08:14 PM
2

Feel to heal. Also learning from past mistakes. For me, my loneliness was a liability; I would allow loneliness to drive me into any relationship that was available. I have suffered much because of this. At this point I would rather be alone than be in a bad relationship. I don’t have any good advice other than getting a pet or trying to connect with other men.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/23 09:05 PM
4

I fall into the same trap. Codependency, becoming attached to quick. For me, I have learned these lessons in my prior relationships and simply refuse to repeat past mistakes. So I do not date and have the bare minimum interaction with the opposite sex. Keeps me sober and off the love drug. Sick and tired of liabilities in my life and only moving forward from here on out.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/23 04:17 PM
2

If things are contentious, ex is NPD, and seeing what she can get away with, then I would never swap a day for any reason. As you said, she is likely testing the waters to see how far she can push you. Hold the line and keep to the schedule.
/r/Divorce_Men30/09/23 01:24 AM
1

I lost 30 pounds during the first year. Weight came back to normal by the end of year two.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/23 12:19 AM
7

I frequently tell my son not to get married. Frequently.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/23 05:01 PM
2

What you describe is rather typical. Sorry you are going through this. You are on the right track by not responding.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/23 10:58 PM
3

It sounds like you are doing the best you can to exercise your 50/50 custody with your work schedule. I am not sure what to say, it isn’t easy. I have 50/50 as well and find myself struggling with continuity of social events. I am choosing to suck it up until the kids are older. Once they are adults I really won’t see them much. So I am trying to make the most of the time that I have now.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 03:10 AM
2

Do you have 50/50 custody, or does one of you have majority custody?
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 03:02 AM
1

I do not believe that is typical. Usually the weekends alternate. Who’s idea was it?
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 02:58 AM
1

You have them every weekend?
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/23 02:56 AM
3

It’s common for women to suddenly warm up to you if they get pregnant from another man. She needs to convince you it’s your so you stick around and pay for it.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/23 11:52 PM
2

Good. File for exclusive use of the marital home. If you have kids and she took them, file for the kids to be returned to the marital home.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/23 01:54 AM
2

Don’t give them to her. You have no obligation to. Worst case: she will comb through them, find something, and use it against you.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/23 11:21 PM
4

Vasectomy is literally one of two options that men have for birth control. Nothing overkill about it. I recommend vasectomy. It’s the only predictable way to control your seed.
/r/Divorce_Men29/08/23 02:53 AM
4

Look into evolutionary psychology for the answer to your question.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/23 11:18 PM
3

Par for the course.
/r/Divorce_Men27/08/23 04:51 AM
8

Sorry for what you are going through. I can relate as my ex was a cheater. I got paternity tests done on my kids to make sure they were mine. It’s scary but you need to face it and do what has to be done. Don’t ever get suckered into paying for and raising a kid that isn’t yours. Not your kid, not your problem.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/23 07:04 PM
8

Your inability to be alone has a 67% chance of coming back to haunt you with a second marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/23 03:14 AM
3

I can relate to much of what you posted. I especially relate to being unable to separate sex and emotions, and feeling dark and empty after the fact. I went through similar when I was a young man, trying to follow the collective bro advice for how a man should operate. I had the one night stand and instead of feeling empowered I felt like trash. So I learned that lesson and said I’m not doing that again. I will add that there is this expectation for men to be these virile sex machines ready to g…
/r/Divorce_Men16/08/23 11:37 PM
2

Sorry I know this sucks emotionally. However she is doing you a huge favor. Get out before that 10 year mark. You are young still and have a good chance to rebuild. Take this opportunity and run with it.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 03:08 AM
6

She probably wants something from you or is setting you up.
/r/Divorce_Men15/08/23 02:30 AM
8

A few thoughts: 1. If she is putting her toxic thoughts into writing, this is actually a good thing. You can use this as ammo in the future if necessary. 2. You don’t need to respond to everything she says. No response does not mean her accusations are true or that you agree with what she wrote. 3. People who write emails and text messages like this generally have some kind of mental illness or personality disorder. And these types thrive on conflict. It gives them energy. Attention is the curre…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/23 12:48 PM
11

Women will claim financial abuse unless they have 100% control of the money and give you a small allowance to spend. They should never hear the word “no” when it comes to spending money. Obviously this is BS, and nothing you posted sounds like financial abuse. Ignore and hold your ground.
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/23 04:29 PM
4

If she is moving out, you have a major advantage. Once she moves out file for exclusive use of the marital home and temporary orders that give you primary custody and majority parenting time. You are very likely to get majority time because you are remaining in the home the children are used to. It’s important to do this because it establishes status quo for you as primary parent. More often than not, the “temporary” orders end up becoming permanent orders.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/23 09:18 PM
14

You are on the right track. There is abundant misandry in our society.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/23 04:02 PM
3

She can (and will) sue you for more child support. You are in a good situation. Stay the course.
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 07:29 PM
1

Unrestrained female nature. Female Nature 101: - Briffault’s Law - She was never yours, it was only your turn - Genuine desire can not be negotiated. Negotiated desire only leads to obligated compliance. Obligated compliance only ever leads to resentment. - Alpha fucks, Beta bucks. We used to have restraints on the aforementioned, such as religion and social shaming/stigma. Currently, the church is more focused on giving people (women) a “fresh start”, rather than holding them accountable for th…
/r/Divorce_Men05/08/23 03:31 PM
4

Agree with what others have said. In short, marriage is simply not possible today due to the current laws incentivizing the worst aspects of female nature.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/23 09:26 PM
8

I appreciate your post. What you have written is very true. I will take it a step further and say that it isn’t even your responsibility to add to their bucket. They need the bucket without the hole, AND they need to be able to be able to fill their bucket on their own.
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/23 04:57 PM
1

Sorry you are going through this. I remember exchanges being very sad for the first year. It eventually gets better, and you get used to it.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 02:49 AM
8

I don't know if I would be so excited. A default judgement can be set aside in the future. Especially if the judgement is unfavorable to the disadvantaged party (e.g. SAHM). Trying to save money now may cost you in the future. I would check with your attorney, but it may be prudent to wait until she responds to the motion.
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/23 02:45 AM
5

You don’t know if she is pregnant with your child. Seriously. The longer you stay in this relationship, the harder, and more expensive, it will be to get out later. I know it can be scary. Be brave and do what needs to be done.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/23 02:36 AM
11

Once I realized sex is a very effective means of control and manipulation, I lost interest in it. I have no regrets. You are essentially trading your freedom, allowing yourself to be oppressed, in exchange for sexual attention. It is not worth it to me. Here is a test, and you can use this test whenever you wonder if any type of involvement with a woman is a good idea: go jack off, and immediately after you have released, ask yourself if the involvement was a good idea. You will have post-nut cl…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/23 08:10 PM
1

Go with your gut.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/23 01:11 AM
5

A common trap that men fall into is staying for the kids. In that scenario, the kids live in misery 100% of the time and seeing their father mistreated is a normal part of life for them. Do you want to continue living this way? Do you want your kids to be raised in this environment? Do you understand how financially screwed you will be if you wait until the kids are grown before you divorce?
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/23 11:14 PM
3

It’s BS. If it’s your kid with your DNA she will be able to get child support out of you. You can’t absolve anyone of child support responsibility. She is tricking you.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/23 03:09 AM
4

You may want to consider the legal implications of cohabitating.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 02:51 AM
3

I feel the same way. I have come to accept it is not in the cards.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/23 02:49 AM
5

Agree with you OP. Many of us have been through the same. It defies all logic and common sense. Hard lesson to learn. Speaking for myself - I will never make that mistake again. No marriage. No cohabitation. No more kids. Peace, quiet, and freedom.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/23 10:49 PM
1

It’s not going to matter. She will push for kids then promptly cease working, only to never go back.
/r/Divorce_Men06/07/23 11:08 PM
1

That is good news for your country. Unfortunately ins America, prenups aren’t that durable. Women claim coercion all the time with minimal evidence. The family court judges have wide latitude from the bench and have the ability to completely throw the prenup out. It’s a false sense of security. The only way to make sure you are protected is to not sign the marriage contract and avoid co-habitating.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 02:22 PM
2

Pre-nup is a false sense of security. It can only protect what you bring into marriage. Even then it’s only sometimes. Pre-nups get thrown out in family court frequently. Best choice is no marriage, no co-habitation.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 05:06 AM
5

1.War brides 2.Light switch effect
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 05:04 AM
3

If she won’t sign a pre-nup, she is making her intentions clear. Call off the wedding and retain your freedom.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/23 12:58 AM
3

It’s normal to have second thoughts, as the process can be intimidating. However let us all encourage you to see it through. Things WILL be better for you when this is over.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/23 03:55 AM
1

Any chance you could play the long game here? Maybe get your affairs in order, hire lawyer, collect documents, open/close necessary accounts, AND get a new job? Say it will take 1 year to accomplish these things. More often than not everyone sides with the woman. Meaning your concerns about reputation are legit. She will badmouth, they will take her side, you run the risk of losing your job and reputation. May not happen, but if it were me I would not take the risk.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 10:46 PM
5

Smart folks.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/23 10:42 PM
2

Solid analogy
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 05:06 PM
2

I love your reverse psychology play. Very cunning.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/23 02:46 AM
1

Yeah, we have all been there. For me, it’s a reminder of what getting too deep in a relationship does to me. When I recall those cringy moments, it encourages me to stay the course in my monk life. I value my sobriety, objectivity, emotional control, and freedom over any supposed benefit a relationship may claim to bring.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/23 04:27 PM
8

We can only touch the titty shaped stove so many times before we refuse to touch it again.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 04:59 AM
21

Looking for that child support pay day.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 04:57 AM
6

I don’t think you are an outlier. I feel the same way. Haven’t bothered with dating and don’t think I ever will. There are other things that have higher priority. I don’t think you are going to get the return on the amount of money, energy, attention, and time you will spend dating. You are on the right track, stay the course.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/23 04:56 AM
2

Yes. If an immigrant has DV committed against them, they are allowed to get their green card faster.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 01:45 PM
3

Fun fact: if she can get a DV charge on you, she gets her green card fast-tracked. She has some major incentive to act the way she is acting.
/r/Divorce_Men21/06/23 03:07 AM
8

Don’t give up 50/50. DO NOT GIVE IT UP.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/23 02:52 AM
4

Monk mode for life.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/23 11:34 AM
1

Answer this: what are you getting out of this relationship? Do you think negotiation will make it better?
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/23 11:08 PM
0

It’s common for the woman to change after marriage, even if you have been together for many years beforehand. She is showing her true colors. Get out now. The more years that pass while you are in denial, the more you will have to pay later. I know it sucks, but she is doing you a favor.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/23 11:07 PM
2

She sounds mentally ill. Do yourself a favor and get out of that relationship. It will never get better.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/23 04:20 PM
2

You can always pay, but you can never discipline.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/23 03:08 PM
3

Marriage and relationships are broken. You are not broken by realizing it.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/23 07:05 PM
3

Spousal support is completely negotiable. Your offer = $0 spousal support.
/r/Divorce_Men09/06/23 01:02 AM
1

Shouldn’t take that long. Once things we signed it was done in a matter of days.
/r/Divorce_Men07/06/23 11:55 PM
1

These conversations are best had with your therapist. Don’t ever talk about your emotions with other people. At best they won’t understand and it will get awkward. At worst they will build a war chest to use against you later.
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/23 12:52 AM
1

Without a referral, best way is to go online and look at the court docket. Look for the attorneys who appear the most in the family law schedule.
/r/Divorce_Men05/06/23 04:47 PM
2

And BTW, they all do this shit. It’s female manipulation. You have a court order on your side. Say no and exercise your parenting time.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 09:33 PM
3

I understand your hesitation. She is violating a court order by taking the kids during your parenting time. You have every right to say no. Kids’ time with parent > activities mother schedules.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 09:32 PM
6

Stop agreeing. If she violates your parenting time start documenting. If you get enough documentation you will have a case and can have the court deal with her.
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/23 07:24 PM
6

I agree. You have to feel the pain. Sit and feel it as long as you can tolerate. The more you do this, the quicker it will go away. It’s important because you are at risk of rushing into another shitty relationship if you don’t learn to be alone. This process takes time, but things do get better if you put the work in.
/r/Divorce_Men02/06/23 01:11 PM
7

No, cut her off.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:53 AM
7

Buy a recorder and record 24/7. Stay in the house.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:48 AM
4

Buy recorders and record at all exchanges. Get video recorders for your car. Get a video recorder to wear on yourself. Get an audio recorder to secret on your person. If an accusation comes your way, show the police the recordings. Get copies of the police reports and bring to court after several have accumulated.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/23 03:46 AM
8

Emotionally, things get better as time passes. Stay away from addictions (alcohol, substances, women) and go to therapy and/or divorce groups. Financially, it is what it is. Strip your monthly expenses down to the studs. Adapt to the new situation. Not much you can do but work on acceptance, learn to make the most with what you have, practice gratitude for the things right in front of you. At any given moment realize you have all that you need.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 04:39 PM
1

Mine have been in the garage for about two years. First year I was ready to have a bonfire but I didn’t. I was angry and wasn’t thinking clearly. After two years, the emotion has passed and I am ready to make a sober decision about what I am going to do.
/r/Divorce_Men26/05/23 04:12 PM
1

Me and my kids
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 08:00 PM
6

I’m in a 3 bed 2 bath apartment. Thought I would be able to buy a house. Doesn’t look like that will be possible. I don’t know how anyone can afford a house after divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men25/05/23 05:14 PM
8

Bro you dodged a bullet. And good for you for noticing the red flag up front (pushing for civil marriage) and calling it off. And another good for you for seeing the situation for what it is — not about God and love, but about business and the bottom line. Stay free.
/r/Divorce_Men23/05/23 10:59 PM
1

Yeah I had that clause too. It’s unenforceable. Most practical thing you can do is document. If she is disobeying other enforceable parts of the divorce agreement you can wrap this in with your overall case as evidence to prove contempt.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 01:06 PM
6

You are on the right track. Consider this question: what does a woman bring to the table? Be brutally honest when you answer.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 12:57 PM
7

She was never yours, it was only your turn. All relationships have expiration dates. You are witnessing female nature first hand. Start learning about hypergamy, briffault’s law, female mating strategy, etc. Learning about these concepts will answer a lot of your questions. I feel for you and understand that it still hurts, emotionally. Feel your feelings and they will pass. Many other men have been through this.
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/23 12:54 PM
1

OP, are you going to try to negotiate with her or are you taking it to court?
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 01:54 AM
2

I am actually going through the same thing. Also interested in what others have to say.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/23 01:43 AM
5

Digital hugs, bro.
/r/Divorce_Men20/05/23 02:21 PM
1

I agree. She doesn’t have other options, so she is trying to keep her hooks in you. If you stay in the marriage, she will be actively looking for a new man. She will file for divorce once she finds one. Pull the trigger and GTFO.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/23 12:52 PM
1

Alimony is negotiable. There is no formula. Negotiate it to zero by giving her a little more of some other asset.
/r/Divorce_Men19/05/23 12:37 AM
3

Acceptance. This is the hardest because when you are rejected the natural instinct is to assume you did something wrong and work hard to save the relationship. Know that your relationship is over and there is nothing you can do to save it. You didn’t do anything wrong. All relationships have expiration dates. You aren’t the first nor will you be the last. It’s OK. Self-care. Go the the gym or go on long walks. Eat nutritious foods. Drink lots of water. Stay away from alcohol and substances. Get …
/r/Divorce_Men18/05/23 12:11 AM
3

They purposely do it wrong because they don’t want to do it in the first place, and they are trying to get out of it . It’s passive aggressiveness. Then, when you say something about it, they counter with “well why don’t you just do it then.” Eventually you just get so frustrated that you do it yourself. The job isn’t hard and doesn’t take long so you take care of it. She gets her way without having to demand it. Women are adept at psychological abuse.
/r/Divorce_Men17/05/23 06:45 PM
2

$6k per month is outrageous. Try $0 per month. Maybe give her a bit more of the other assets.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:06 PM
1

When you see other couples, always remember: there is more to the story.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:04 PM
3

I had dreams too. They went away after ~1.5 years.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:03 PM
2

The anxiety of an impending trial focuses the mind on reaching a settlement.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 11:02 PM
3

Some of them lose their mind and marriage and never get it back. She is doing you a huge favor. Get out immediately.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/23 05:08 PM
2

Agree. I had a gym membership but never went. I did go on long walks though. They were very therapeutic.
/r/Divorce_Men14/05/23 10:10 PM
2

Sugar and spice and everything nice, right?
/r/Divorce_Men12/05/23 08:25 PM
3

You can’t waive child support. Child support is handled by support enforcement separate from family court. She can say that she won’t ask for it as a negotiation point. Then once everything is finalized she can got to support enforcement and get child support established. All support enforcement needs is the parenting plan. They will look your financial information up and calculate it from there. If she is using it as a bargaining chip, you are getting played.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 02:14 AM
12

Yeah that’s bs. You can’t sign away alimony on a prenup. Maybe protect premarital assets, but that’s it. Judge can set the whole thing aside if they want to.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/23 02:08 AM
3

I’m not saying trapped with the kid. I am saying trapped with the woman. The relationship has expired. She is trying to baby trap so she can cash in on child support for 18 years. If she baby traps then she will refuse to go back to work. Milk a few more years out of the marriage. Then cash out with majority of marital assets and alimony due to income mismatch.
/r/Divorce_Men02/05/23 01:09 PM
11

Agree. Get out immediately. If you have a kid with her, you are trapped for 18 years at least. That’s a bad situation to be in.
/r/Divorce_Men01/05/23 10:55 PM
13

Women initiate divorce 70% of the time. No religion, no tradition, no ideology will eradicate female nature. When conditions are right for her to express it, she will.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/23 04:14 PM
1

Financial austerity. Drain the joint accounts and put all the money in new account in your name. Your stbx can be responsible for getting her own money by working for it. Your paycheck = your money. Don’t give her shit unless it’s court ordered.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/23 05:17 AM
2

These people aren’t your problem. Sell the house and tell them to move on. Your priorities are the following: 1. YOU 2. Your daughter. Everyone else can go to hell.
/r/Divorce_Men30/04/23 05:14 AM
3

Just keep showing up. Valuable advice.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/23 01:44 PM
1

That’s out of control. I am sorry for your unfavorable judgement. There has to be a way to turn things around.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/23 01:31 AM
1

Remember: there is always more to the story.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/23 02:49 AM
2

I am supportive of her moving. I am not supportive of her taking the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/23 02:41 AM
1

Was there any legal action necessary? How did you modify your parenting plan? Child support? Custody modification? We’re you divorced already, or was the move away part of the divorce?
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/23 04:43 PM
-1

Dead bedroom was never a problem for me.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/23 08:55 PM
2

DNA test isn’t going to matter. If he’s been supporting the kid for 5 years and signed the birth certificate, he will be on hook for child support. Waste of time. Pursue the divorce. Get yourself into counseling. Don’t bother with women again as you have had a good taste of female nature.
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 03:13 PM
3

Bro I am the same way as you. Very introverted and hate being around people. Ex was way better at the social stuff. But I am finding my way. Just keep showing up. Show up to your kids activities at their school. Have birthday parties for your kids and invite people. Get their parents’ phone numbers when they RSVP. You don’t need to be buddy buddy. Relationships will naturally develop especially once your kids start requesting play dates. That will give you an excuse to make contact with other pa…
/r/Divorce_Men18/04/23 01:18 AM
2

This is an excellent post.
/r/Divorce_Men17/04/23 06:08 PM
5

Agreed. Monk life is where it’s at.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/23 02:24 PM
9

You don’t know the whole story. For all you know that woman could be putting him through hell, cheating on him, asking for an open relationship. You just don’t know. Marriage is completely unnatural for the human animal. It is a social institution invented to control people. People will naturally rebel against institutions designed to oppress them. Incentives and sanctions have to be in place to encourage people to tolerate unnatural situations. There used to be incentives and for staying marrie…
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/23 08:55 PM
9

Sounds like projection. She accuses you of what she is doing as a distraction.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/23 11:50 PM
4

I was having this same feeling recently. I was thinking: I can’t believe I was married to this person.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/23 12:05 PM
4

You are not the problem. Read about the light switch effect. Read about war brides. All relationships have an expiration date. Women intrinsically know this and move on quick once the love chemicals wear off. It has nothing to do with you. You are fine and lovable just how you are.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 04:40 PM
7

No you aren’t a dumb ass. Many other men have experienced this as well. She showed you exactly what you wanted to see for five years. She created a fantasy. Once you were hooked she revealed who she really was. Then you spent the next 20 years in a state of bewilderment. Wondering where this fantastical person went. Wondering what you did wrong to drive them away and bring out this monster. It’s who they were all along. It is very painful to realize.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/23 01:57 PM
8

Also don’t be fooled by the woman who says she is career focused. She will eventually push for additional commitments such as a house, then kids. Once she has met those objectives, she will promptly announce that she will not be working any more. The bait and switch. Why does she do this? Because this is currently incentivized by the law and family court system. She knows that is the way to extract the most amount of money out of you when the relationship expires. All relationships have an expir…
/r/Divorce_Men09/04/23 07:20 PM
6

Zero sex drive here. I’m still young enough that I “should” have one. But after going through divorce and understanding female nature, I’m just not interested any more.
/r/Divorce_Men06/04/23 04:23 PM
2

100% agree
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/23 11:29 PM
4

Bro just beat off and get that post nut clarity. The moment after you release, ask yourself if you think a hook up is still a good idea. Chances are you will see things clearly.
/r/Divorce_Men02/04/23 03:52 AM
3

Once divorce is threatened, the relationship is over. Meet with an attorney and get out while you can. What do you think will happen if you cave to her demands? Do you think this is the last time she will play the divorce card?
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 03:40 PM
11

Same here. Don’t ever want to be that close to someone again. Peace, quiet, and freedom > everything else.
/r/Divorce_Men01/04/23 03:37 PM
2

Right on brother
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 01:27 AM
9

Five Finger Death Punch - F8 (entire album) I Prevail - Trauma (entire album) Best individual songs for divorce: Fit For A King - Fracture Sakoya - Wandering Wage War - God Speed I Prevail - Hurricane and Let me Be Sad
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/23 01:22 AM
3

I have been monk since my divorce. Two years and I don’t regret it. Not interested in repeating the same mistakes. Taking the time to do some serious work on myself before getting involved again.
/r/Divorce_Men30/03/23 12:28 AM
5

Briffaults Law
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/23 12:39 AM
1

She is being manipulative. “I’m concerned for our son” = “I’m concerned for me, and I need your money to pay for my life”. This is not your problem. She needs to figure out how to support herself. It’s part of divorce. It is not your problem. You priorities are #1 yourself, #2 your son.
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 01:28 PM
1

Her financial issues are not your problem.
/r/Divorce_Men28/03/23 01:18 AM
2

I am sorry for what you are going through. But don’t jump into another relationship to make yourself feel better. You will very likely repeat the same dysfunctional behavior that put you in your current situation. Read the wait one year before dating sticky. Also go get a therapist, or two. You aren’t ready for a relationship until you are content being single, meaning your own internal validation is enough to make yourself happy.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/23 08:46 PM
3

You are a fool. No one is going to care as much about your case as you do. Do your own homework. Make your own plan. Have your lawyer review and make necessary revisions. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 04:04 PM
2

It is not your lawyer’s job to come up with a parenting plan. You write your own and submit it to your lawyer for review. There are sample plans and guides on your state courthouse’s website. Also check out custodyxchange.com. That website will walk you through building a parenting plan.
/r/Divorce_Men12/03/23 02:02 PM
2

Don’t get her anything. DO get yourself something.
/r/Divorce_Men01/03/23 08:41 PM
6

Motion for exclusive use of marital home. Motion for children to be returned to marital home. Hire PI to find wife and kids. TRO for 100% custody for you. Do it now.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/23 01:21 AM
10

Pro tip: Stop co-parenting. Start parallel parenting. You can’t control what she does, so stop trying. Don’t ever communicate with her unless it is a major issue having to do with the kids. Focus more on making your relationship with your kids the best it can be.
/r/Divorce_Men21/01/23 03:01 PM
14

I agree with the above. During my divorce, ex started an affair with a married man. His wife tried to contact me. I immediately blocked her and refused to get drawn into the drama. My goal was to maintain an objective and sober mind while going through the divorce process. I knew that I would have to live with the outcome of my divorce for the rest of my life and wanted to be on top of my game. My advice is to cease contact with this woman. She is likely fishing for drama and attention and very …
/r/Divorce_Men19/01/23 02:15 PM
2

Screw your family. They don’t have to live your life.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 01:56 AM
9

I don’t think you can trust again. Not if you are operating with a sober and rational mind anyway. How many times will a man touch the hot stove and get burned before he learns? The next time is no different than the last.
/r/Divorce_Men18/01/23 01:38 AM
1

Can those who claim they are having no problems getting women please post their stats: height, build (skinny, muscular, fat), and income. Be honest.
/r/Divorce_Men09/01/23 01:53 AM
7

Don’t bother with co-parenting. It’s a waste of time. Further it’s a way to keep yourself psychologically and emotionally crippled by remaining forever entangled with your ex. Look into parallel parenting. It’s the best for you and your kids.
/r/Divorce_Men08/01/23 11:43 PM
1

I would immediately ambush the guy and start swinging on him. Set the tone so he knows where he stands. … We have all felt that way anyway. Seriously though, there isn’t much you can do. You only control yourself and the environment you have for your kids. Make your home as stable as possible. Be loving and consistent in your parenting. Don’t bother worrying about the ex or her new bf. You can’t control them.
/r/Divorce_Men07/01/23 10:49 PM
0

Every area is different. I found support groups through Divorce Care and Beginning Experience. They are mixed groups, not male-specific. You can also try mensgroup.com. It’s online zoom meetings with a messaging platform similar to other social media platforms. It is male-specific.
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/22 04:12 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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