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RippedOffFather Archive

View 5 posts and 71 comments by RippedOffFather on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

It happened with mine. She always had a few issues but once she got pregnant it was a wrap. Straight downhill from there and now I’m stuck in this legal battle.
/r/Divorce_Men11/05/23 04:15 PM
1

Actually the court should be looking to see the records to see which parent was the one accompanying the child. Truth be told the family court system is rigged and biased against men. Facts don’t seem to matter. You need to focus on building up a financial war chest and getting the best attorney that you can find. Especially one that has clout with your local court.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 07:42 PM
4

Let the house foreclose. Sell the house. Short sale. Either way unless you NEED the credit bad, move on. Forget them. Let them fend for themselves. No one is going to look out for you. Once you understand that hard choices become easy ones.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 05:25 AM
14

Who cares about couples? Focus on yourself. Rebuild. Rebuild. Rebuild. Don’t even think about her. Rebuild. If you have to get into a new career do so. I did. In less than a year I financially rebuilt myself. It was hard at times, and I felt real hunger for once in my life, but that stage is over with. Now it’s about making things right (legally).
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/23 05:23 AM
11

F them. Cut them off. Loyalty is everything. You learned a lesson. Make new friends. Find new family.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 07:19 PM
2

Ask attorney for advice and see about setting it up so you get more custody/control. If no such chance exists of getting more control, then I would say NO to her request. I wouldn’t even bother telling her no. I’d just spend your day with him and have a nice party. Oh and ask a different lawyer. Your old lawyer failed you.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 02:34 PM
1

Fire the house sitter. She’s creating new expenses/bills and isn’t providing any income.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 02:27 PM
1

She created another bill with his money, since she doesn’t even work.
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 02:26 PM
1

Buy a tape recorder than can be turned on (not a voice activated one). Buy indoor cameras that can record 24/7 and have them installed (ones with audio). They have some you can simply just plug-in. I know Amazon sells some small ones that plug into the outlets. She probably wouldn’t notice them. Let your lawyer handle everything from this point on. Don’t argue with her. Don’t discuss the divorce with her. Don’t talk about anything other than your children and ONLY if it’s not related to the divo…
/r/Divorce_Men27/12/22 01:31 PM
1

Sadly I fear that you don’t understand the gravity of the situation, and that people can act differently from what they say their intentions are. She’s stalling, buying time. Time only favors your adversary.
/r/Divorce_Men26/12/22 01:23 AM
2

Unless you find a woman that is totally, 100% into you and you know would never leave you, never get married. Such women do exist. Thinking back in time, I had 2 women like that. Really, 1 of them was a superstar. Used to buy me stuff and everything. I wasn’t ready at the time and let her get away. Outside of those rare occurrences, yes date all day, have sex all day, but don’t let her live with you and don’t marry her. If she leaves, find a replacement. Now the kid issue is tricky. I’d still ad…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 12:16 PM
15

You’ve already won because you don’t have kids with her. So now you’re up 2-0. Question. You’re divorced and no kids, why even answer her call? She’d be a ghost to me.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 12:07 PM
5

Me, personally, speaking for ME, I would not let her inside of you or your parents residence. Have the exchange happen outside. I would try not to interact with her. Make sure your parents understand and are onboard. Say your goodbyes to the kids in advance (not last minute at the door in front of the female), open the door, let the kids out, close the door. I wouldn’t communicate. Record everything. Cell phones and an audio recorder as well (not a voice activated recorder). DO NOT go to pick th…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 12:05 PM
2

If you haven’t filed for divorce yet, do so. ASAP. If you are in proceedings, your lawyer needs to be more aggressive. Why do you have to wait 2 weeks to see your child? Should be a temporary order in place. As far as the new boyfriend, that tells you all you need to know. He’s probably not new. If he is new, this is why you need to fight tooth and nail for custody and forget all of these emotions about “not eating a hot meal with her family”. Who cares about them or friends you met through her?…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 11:59 AM
4

If you haven’t filed for divorce yet, do so. ASAP. If you are in proceedings, your lawyer needs to be more aggressive. Why do you have to wait 2 weeks to see your child? Should be a temporary order in place. As far as the new boyfriend, that tells you all you need to know. He’s probably not new. If he is new, this is why you need to fight tooth and nail for custody and forget all of these emotions about “not eating a hot meal with her family”. Who cares about them or friends you met through her?…
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 11:59 AM
4

Exactly
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 11:55 AM
3

You must have a lot of enemies then, because my ex is definitely the biggest enemy I have ever had, and has done more to damage my life than anyone I’ve ever encountered.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 02:29 AM
11

You clearly don’t see what he said. His father threw a party, didn’t tell him about it, but invited the ex to the party. His father wrote him off.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 02:28 AM
5

You should support your friend/family no matter what, right or wrong, and then discuss it with them after the fact. Your father is no longer your father. I wouldn’t argue with him. I wouldn’t have another sit down with him. I wouldn’t give him an ultimatum. I’d treat him how he wants to be treated, and that’s as her father (not yours). He wouldn’t get another word from me. He wouldn’t get anything out of me. If he wants to see the kids, he can continue to see them through her.
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/22 12:56 AM
29

She probably suffers from depression, daddy issues, and a host of other problems. That’s what I was dealing with also. When I met her, she was miserable about her job. She changed jobs to “what matches her degree because it’ll be better”, and immediately started complaining about that. She complained that I wouldn’t marry her. Got married and she was begging for a child. Got pregnant and she was miserable. Marriage “ended” once she got pregnant. I blame myself because I saw warning signs that I …
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 12:40 PM
6

I posted a question on the legal advice sub, and they removed it for “being unanswerable”. I messaged them saying that anything can be deemed unanswerable and that makes no sense because I was asking a question about a specific federal law. I explained that if the question is “too hard to answer” (which is what they messaged me saying) that the obvious result is my question would receive no answers. Why did they feel the need to delete the question? The following response from them was an insult…
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 12:34 PM
4

Maybe I’m just cold hearted at this point, but why do you care about “friends”? If someone can’t change what you eat, what you drive, where you live, why do you care? The same way you met them, you can meet other people. It’s not that big of a deal. “You should love your enemies, and hate your friends. Because friends come and go, but enemies stay the same.” That’s the mantra I use. I view everyone as an acquaintance until they show me true devotion and make it into the friendship realm.
/r/Divorce_Men24/12/22 12:27 PM
2

Delete your reply.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 01:26 PM
3

Situational awareness is important. She’s no longer a friend, lover, or interested in your well being. She is now the biggest challenge/enemy of your life. She’s trying to tear down your existence. If you aren’t aware of this and cry in a pillow at night because she didn’t spend the night with you, don’t bother hiring an attorney. Just give her what she wants and save your money.
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 04:09 AM
2

Your son is a teenager. She left and didn’t bring the son. You have the son. I envy you. You’re going to get 50/50 or better with you as the custodial. You may even get full custody. Just don’t turn weak and get that “I want this over with” mentality. If you need to work more overtime, find a better paying job, or work another job part time then do so. Unfortunately for me, my wife kidnapped my child and my situation is in reverse (outside of any court order). I’d trade places with you in a hear…
/r/Divorce_Men23/12/22 01:15 AM
1

One thing I disagree with, there seems to be little to no repercussions for lying in family court. Also really no penalties for the woman not honoring the judgment.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 10:37 PM
1

Anger gets shit done. Get angry and stop feeling sorry for yourself. She’s nothing to you now. She’s a stranger. Remember that. You’ve dated other women in your past. You moved on from them. Do the same with her.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 10:36 PM
1

What you are saying is the truth except I think that’s why it hasn’t been solved. People over complicate things. Own the judges. Own the politicians. How many people take time to research the judge that’s being elected? People vote along party lines. Fair enough. Now what happens when a judge on your party runs against you and is backed by a few dollars? Actual campaign ads? For the politicians. It’s even easier. Focus on state politicians. Now imagine something like abortion laws gets an attach…
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 07:45 PM
8

I get it but she’s a stranger at this point. Treat her like one. Where she goes and if she returns isn’t your concern anymore. Don’t stress it. In the meantime, stay away from other women until you’re officially divorced since it can be used against you and she can accuse you of adultery (until officially divorced). Also get that tape recorder ASAP.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 06:08 PM
13

Why do you care that she hasn’t been home? It’s over with. Collect yourself and drop all feelings for her. Since you are in Germany, contact the legal assistance office on base and ask them how to proceed. DO NOT tell her what you are doing. Don’t discuss the divorce with her anymore. I suggest buying a tape recording device that plays 24/7 (not voice activated) and record any conversations you have with her. File for divorce. Move on. You gain nothing from her. Luckily you don’t have any childr…
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 05:58 PM
5

You’re not bound by blood. You weren’t raised together. At this point she is no different than a coworker or a person you meet in passing. You should not have any feeling, one way or the other. Do you weep every time you hear a sad story in the news? You just change the channel to your favorite sitcom. She’s a stranger. Move on.
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 03:57 PM
1

When a woman does it, it’s because a man drove her away. She drove you into the arms of other women. In the end, it was her fault but you felt an obligation to your son to stay around. In hindsight, you should have divorced her once she stopped fulfilling her marital and spiritual obligations to you. That doesn’t make you a bad person. That makes you the victim. Move on and be grateful that you are out of that terrible situation. Focus on fighting for the best interest of your son, and stop grie…
/r/Divorce_Men22/12/22 12:47 PM
3

The goal should be automatic 50/50, no mandatory child support or financial obligations unless under certain criteria. It should require something extreme to change that automatic status.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 08:58 PM
4

They charge a percentage fee. I started looking into that myself. Usually something like 2-3%. As far as existing organizations, they have accomplished nothing. No point in dealing with them. It’s time for a real group that is willing to do whatever is legally allowed to achieve the final result.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 05:19 PM
2

Will be too hard to separate it from the court system. Only way to win is to control the players.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 03:18 PM
9

She kidnapped my child and took him out of state. Literally, grabbed him from a family member of mine in my house and took off with us in chase. None of it matters. I spoke to one attorney and he told me to just get visitation setup. I thought he was crazy but now I see he knew what he knew. Wasting over half a year and tens of thousands and still haven’t even had a hearing or seen my child.
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 02:52 PM
4

Correct. They also take everything as a personal attack on themselves. For example, if I’m with you and I notice your breath is smelling but we’re about to be around other people, I would let you know I smell it and I have some mints or whatever in the vehicle (this happened with a friend of mine). The friend thanked me and we moved on. If it was the kidnapper who stole my child and left the state (my wife), she’d get defensive, go on the attack, smell her breath afterwards and still refuse to t…
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 02:11 PM
25

Do you not have a brain? Why are you even asking this. If you delay, she’s going to file first on you after she gets her ducks in a row. Go find an attorney and file asap, like asap. I mean today. Don’t tell her you’re doing it either. Let her find out when she gets served. What I don’t get is why you even told her you found that in her watch and are discussing it with HER mother like HER mother is going to go against HER daughter for you. I repeat. DO NOT TELL HER YOU’RE FILING FOR DIVORCE. Do …
/r/Divorce_Men21/12/22 12:45 AM
5

Document it. Keep paperwork and conversations in a safe storage unit. Show your child things like this when they come of age. Let them see who was the real hero. I wouldn’t pay child support to makeup for it and let her deal with the paperwork. Say you can’t afford the child support because you paid 100% of the medical expenses. See how the we’re broke works both ways?
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 10:48 PM
4

After she’s done brainwashing them, do you think this gesture of yours is going to show that you’re a good person? She’s the hero of her story. Everyone she talks to about your situation she is going to be the nicest, sweetest, most innocent person (and she has the kids and assets to prove the court agrees). Good luck being the “bigger person”. You don’t even have your pride and self respect at that point. She’s going to feel like she controls you and won/
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 10:38 PM
8

Snakes only shed their skin to grow into a bigger snake. Worry about yourself and your children. You think that this is going to end with y’all playing house and having family days? The second she has the advantage she’ll take the opportunity.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 07:59 PM
5

Time does not heal all wounds. Why do you think things will improve or be different? Keep the status quo. While you’re sitting here thinking of playing nice, she’s talking to a group of females who are telling her how to beat you. How do you think that’s going to work out? Why does she need photos of the kids from you? She doesn’t see the kids or something? If not, what are you hoping to accomplish by sending her pictures of children she’s going to see in a few days?
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 06:58 PM
1

6 months. I’ll have some updates soon hopefully. Can’t discuss the current game-plan but we’ll see what happens.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 06:25 PM
2

I didn’t even read any of that. Get a lawyer. Get the best lawyer that you can afford. Don’t think she’s going to be your friend or work with you. Even if she tries to play that angle now, understand that it is a tactic and deceptive. Fight with an attorney until you get the terms that best serve YOU and to children. Then you can be “flexible” while you control the cards. Trust me, if she gets what she wants, she won’t show you any mercy.
/r/Divorce_Men20/12/22 06:24 PM
1

No. Because the home state (where I reside and where the case is supposed to be held) can’t do anything about it while the other state has the case in limbo. In the other state, my attorney can’t submit anything other than the motion to dismiss because the second they file paperwork the court will argue that they have jurisdiction. There’s been some discussions with my attorneys about what we need to do going forward, but that’s basically how this has played out so far.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 11:58 PM
2

This was done. The home state judge put a stay or whatever on it because the other state has it. In the other state an emergency was filed and they scheduled it for the same day as the normal hearing. Then guess what? When it was time for the normal hearing they never had it and instead said “oh I just realized the other state wanted a conference with the judge about jurisdiction”. This is 3-4 months after it was requested! Now they’re saying it’ll take 2-3 months to even do that! This is what I…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 08:47 PM
3

You’re not understanding. She kidnapped the child and hid. She filed first. The court system is rigged so that by her filing first the home state can’t take the case until the other state dismisses the case. The other state has stalled the process this long to benefit her. Get it now? Even the courts in my state have requested things and the other state ignores it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 08:32 PM
6

No. End contact with her outside of what’s court ordered. Don’t deal with her outside of what’s court ordered.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 07:34 PM
2

God bless you. I hope it turns out well for you. You’re a lucky man, all things considered.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 07:25 PM
7

Keep documentation of everything. Start audio recording her. Consult with an attorney and keep proof that YOU are the main caregiver. Keep proof that YOU did not consent to the debt and that it’s being used to buy her family houses. Once your lawyer feels he’s ready, file for a divorce and custody.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 07:09 PM
7

They say rule of law but it’s really not. I’m learning that judges/magistrates run it and oftentimes don’t even follow the law. I feel like her attorney has leverage with the courts there and has been using it to delay any movement in my favor.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 05:16 PM
2

She has a job there. You can say it’s bad advice, but she’s getting everything she wants thus far. Let me guess, you’re going to cite legal jargon and say the law says 6 months in the state and blah blah. My lawyers have been trying to get her claims dismissed in her state for that long based on the law. The law doesn’t work. Courts aren’t ran by the law. Courts are ran by judges and magistrates who can decide whatever they want to decide and there’s nothing you can do about it. My lawyers seeme…
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 05:00 PM
3

Talk to an attorney. Most states have referral lines you can call and get a consultation at a discount like $50. Or find one that does it for free. Never go into these situations unprepared.
/r/Divorce_Men19/12/22 12:36 AM
1

Exactly. She’s hiding my child from me but wants money to buy a specific gift? Buy your children whatever YOU want. You don’t have to buy what she wants.
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 02:24 PM
4

I’m in the same boat. Over half a year now. Haven’t seen my child. Haven’t even had a hearing yet. The difference is she took my child out of state and I believe that I’m dealing with forces that go beyond her lawyer. It’s almost as if this is a criminal case and I’m fighting the state.
/r/Divorce_Men16/12/22 11:01 PM
2

See if NC has a lawyer referral service. Interview a few of them.
/r/Divorce_Men15/12/22 08:56 PM
3

She snatched the child and the divorce/custody is taking place in 2 states because her state doesn’t have jurisdiction but is tying up the case so that my state (which does have jurisdiction) can’t move forward. It’s been over half a year. That’s what’s adding up. Court system has done me NO favors. I now believe every single person who said they were ever screwed in court. The laws don’t even apply in the courts.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/22 11:44 PM
4

The state she is in filed a temporary order preventing child from leaving the state. It was a big setup. They don’t even have jurisdiction and are just holding up the case so the child’s home state can’t go forward with the case.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/22 10:31 PM
12

6 months. 5 figures on 2 attorneys in 2 states. Haven’t even had a legit hearing yet. The system is a joke. Cops didn’t help when it happened either.
/r/Divorce_Men13/12/22 10:01 PM
4

At least no kids with her. Don’t communicate directly with her anymore. Nothing will come from it.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 09:36 PM
1

If you could agree and come to a settlement, you wouldn’t be in this position with her now. In life, people only want to “settle” or negotiate when they are in a position of weakness. It’s usually a ploy to get their ducks in a row, or to save themselves from total defeat. You cannot tire out. That is her plan. That is her goal. She’s hoping she can start throwing stuff at the wall until you just want to give up or until you get scared of the outcome and rather settle.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 07:10 PM
2

A snake only sheds its skin to grow into a larger snake.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 05:13 PM
6

Do not even communicate with her. You loved her. She didn’t love you. Don’t give in because it’s a ploy or the cycle will just repeat. People don’t change. I should have paid attention to the warning signs and never even married mine.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 03:19 PM
10

It’s all a joke, I’m learning. Until men/fathers get a strong advocacy group that makes large political donations to national and local politicians (and judges), nothing will change. Mine is claiming that she was the financial breadwinner and solely took care of everything (which is ironic if you knew the truth), but in the same breath is asking for child support saying that I’m employed and can afford it. Huh? I’m a bum or I’m not?
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 12:39 PM
3

File first so you control the narrative. Make sure you have your own lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 01:58 AM
10

Don’t get married. The only pro to it is you’ll technically have parental rights afforded to you that normally would require a court order, but in reality, she can kidnap the kids and run off like mine did. Courts won’t help you. When you start making progress, she’ll play the abuse card. Everything, and I mean everything else, is not to your benefit.
/r/Divorce_Men11/12/22 12:37 AM
2

I’m still in the middle of litigation. Start interviewing lawyers and saving up lots of money. It’s not a joke. Strike first also. Don’t wait for her to make her move. Make yours first. Try to control the litigation process.
/r/Divorce_Men09/12/22 01:53 AM
4

Lawyer up. Start saving money. It’s coming. I wasn’t expecting it because we never had a relationship that included yelling or fighting, and she still made the accusations during the divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 11:52 PM
5

I believe it. It’s crazy how the legal system works and there’s no oversight. It’s like a foreign country.
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 11:48 PM
1

Got it. Thank you everyone. Yes I already have multiple lawyers since this fight is taking place in 2 states. Already spent 5 figures and it just started
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 09:04 AM
1

What you’re implying is that this could impact employment prospects, even if no criminal charges or evidence?
/r/Divorce_Men08/12/22 08:44 AM
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