A promise

nakedloveforyou · 2022-12-21T19:09:22+00:00

That sounds like a good promise as I'm working on this myself. I was forced into a 4 year litagation and custody battle by an evil abusive narcissist cow. She expected every pre marital assets including my home that I owned years before I was scammed by the miserable bitch. I hired the best father's rights attorneys, private investigators, we discovered 2 previous divorces on her record plus a criminal record! Talk about betrayal. Then, came the parental alienation tactics. 3 custody experts, 4 years and 7 figures in my attorney fees, we demolished the career criminal. I went from almost losing my house, pre marital assets and limited visitation to getting everything back including custody. Sure it cost me dearly, financially, emotionally and everything else. Would war 3 however, she did it all to herself.

Men, wake up, get your heads out of your asses and get ready to do battle. Unfortunately, it's the only way a man can and will win. Too many men, including a number of my friends just walked away because they didn't want the drama anymore which I can totally relate to but what other options do we have? Sure, give her everything and leave your kids? I don't think so..

kdthex01 · 2022-12-21T16:58:27+00:00

One thing to investigate, that may actually get some traction, is stop allowing family courts to treat child support and alimony as profit centers.

Tbh I’m not sure how it works, and I think it varies state by state, and I could be wrong, but my rough understanding is that the more somebody pays the more the family courts get.

Also look at the existing mens rights groups and see where you can help.

playerknowmore · 2022-12-21T20:23:03+00:00

Did you know that the divorce rate was two percent before 1960? Two major things happened in the sixties that forever changed divorce on the west. Equal rights bill passed on sixty-four. Then, in sixty-nine California, inacted no fault divorce laws. Which spread across the country in the seventies. In two decades, the divorce rate went from two percent to fifty percent.

The difference between at fault and no fault is accountability. When people were held accountable, they were forced to work on their marriage. The next thing you have to understand is that women initiate divorce eighty percent of the time. Why does that matter? Instead of women being held accountable, they are insentivized to leave. They get spousal support, and and child support. Even if their husband has nothing, she gets welfare and housing assistance.

Under the guise of simplifying the law, governors created the biggest boom in divorce rates in human history. What good is a simpler law if it creates a huge case load? MONEY!!!!! Remember, there weren't many female judges, lawyers, or governors in the sixties. No fault divorce is created out of pure greed.

The only way I see fixing the divorce industry would be to cripple the trillion dollars marriage industry. Imagine if men refused to get married until the laws were made more fair.

In two years, they would limit spousal support to wives that were completely supported by her husband. Then, a three year end date on spousal support.

By the third year, child support would be revisited and simplified. If child support was done away with in cases where the father wants to participate in his children's lives. Basically, deincentify women from benefiting from divorce and watch the divorce rate dwindle below ten percent again.

SwamiSweatSocks · 2022-12-21T19:49:32+00:00

Men must insist on pre nuptial agreements before a marriage. And any significant assets should go in a trust if you have them. Even then it’s a crapshoot if the court will be fair.

Dangerous_Item_6879 · 2022-12-22T02:25:34+00:00

All we can do is warn our sons, nephews, cousins, friends and other young men that we know about the dangers of marrying the wrong woman.

Jasey_Cones · 2022-12-21T23:58:06+00:00

This is why I hate America. It's a woman's country. It's gone from being equal to men to being in charge of everything they can get their hands on, destroying everything in their path and being psychotic nut jobs... Just like the men of the past that they so desperately wanted to be free from.

Whole country has gone full circle. Started with slavery and cruelty committed by men, mellowed out with men easing up, giving women equal rights, ending slavery, ending segregation and equal rights for blacks, and now it's back to slavery and cruelty committed by women.

So for now... Until women change... Fuck women. Die in a corner alone, you disgusting animals.

rosefan001 · 2022-12-21T14:39:16+00:00

This is honestly one reason I'm hesitant about divorce. Because I know I'll get screwed over because of my kids. Even a lawyer I did a free consolation with said that I'll be paying child support without even really diving deep into my case. That shows how fucked up and sexist the courts are to fathers.

ProcedureAltruistic3 · 2022-12-21T21:40:15+00:00

I'll volunteer any services needed and I'd definitely pledge money to a cause such as this. My ex thank God took the civil route but I was popped for a huge fight I thankfully didn't have to have. But while preparing I read and heard all of the horror stores and realized we are an under represented group who has been failed by government and society. When you need help look me up. This is something I can and will get behind.

pk2at · 2022-12-21T16:01:59+00:00

If you are really this serious why don't you spread the message about legal separation soon after marriage vs going for a prenup? Its a great loophole currently available in some states. Hardly any men know about it, most still think the marriage needs to breakdown before going to court. Whenever I try to post in a high traffic area, it gets deleted or banned

Grand-Expression-493 · 2022-12-21T20:02:15+00:00

Thanks for your promise. I hate to be that guy, but whatever you do, it won't matter in grand scheme of things. This stuff is too ingrained in society, you're going to be met with massive resistance, you'll be called ugly names etc.

derelictherds · 2022-12-21T20:34:50+00:00

It's a worthy cause and many divorced men have expressed similar thoughts at one time or another(myself included). One problem I've noticed with these types of efforts is that they're often woefully disorganized and out of touch with reality. People start at "equal rights" and "good intentions" and end up pushing some rather extreme views. No different than other controversial US-based political movement in that regard. This has at least been my experience.

pk2at · 2022-12-21T16:02:55+00:00

You should reach out to happily married men and ask them to divorce insure themselves using legal separation

Forsaken-Database540 · 2022-12-21T15:08:41+00:00

I feel the same way, I want to run a campaign that illuminates the injustices that is the family court. Its absurd, never in all my life would I have thought such an anomaly of justice would exist.

I have a concept where anything involving money (in a divorce) can be judged/determined in a court, but anything involving children is determined by a panel that is NOT a court, the entire system needs to be re-created.

mrcofffeeee · 2022-12-22T14:06:02+00:00

2 major issues

The amount of money legal industry makes with all the divorces, they will never allow the laws to be partial. Who would want to hire a lawyer if they knew they cannot gain something extra which forces the defending party to hire another lawyer to protect themselves
The ethics of few women going down where they feel if the husband is not good enough for them, then find a new one who is. The raise in fake DV cases shows how low they can go to get what they want. How is fake DV case any better than backstabbing?

The day my ex filed a fake DV case and CPO my lawyer said she is going to file for Divorce soon and that it happens all the time to gain advantage during the divorce process. This clearly shows that legal system is aware of what's happening but they do not care, because its their bread and butter. They want both parties to lawyer up and pay $300 per hour which will clearly not happen if laws are CLEAR, TRANSPARENT AND FAIR.

BurnDownTheMission68 · 2022-12-22T18:35:18+00:00

You’ll have to defeat gynocentricism itself to achieve this goal.

And very few even know what that even is.

Even men who have been through the divorce ringer.

People want the status quo.

caliguy75 · 2022-12-22T22:14:15+00:00

Good luck with that one. Family courts across America tend to favor the mother in custody battles when dealing with children "in tender years". After the children reach puberty, the court may be more open to fathers getting primary custody.

My brother in laws young wife moved out with their three year old son and moved in with a young surfer boy. The their life together was in part subsidized by my BIL's child support payments.

Then she move on to many other guys with her son in toe.. Some of whom were high value guys who were interested in a relationship which she found a way to end.

My adult nephew has told my adult son that some of the guy's she brought in were pretty abusive to him.

The best advice is to stay closely connected to him on a daily basis to offer support, get to know his teachers, friends and their families. Attend all school activities, and soccer games, concerts, etc. After his balls drop and he is no longer a cute little boy you have a very good chance to get him back.

I know a number of guys who have gone through this experience.

I am very sorry for your painful experience. Unfortunately, many women frame men as dead beat dads. Some are but many are high value people who pay child support and are actively involved in their child's life after divorce.

Title	A promise
Author	RippedOffFather
Upvotes	53
Comments	39
Date	December 21, 2022 2:18 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/zrnq60/a_promise/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/a-promise.1144919 https://theredarchive.com/post/1144919

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