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This_Train340i Archive

View 0 posts and 339 comments by This_Train340i on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

The punishment for these demon false excusers should be the maximum sentence of the crime they falsely accused another.
/r/Divorce_Men24/11/24 12:23 PM
7

The first time I stood up to my crazy making wife, she wanted a divorce. Thing is, I don't play that game and I completely checked out. It was only a few months later when she filed, at which time I had become completely indifferent to her. I am still angry at myself for allowing that into my life because the red flags were there and my dumbass just pushed it away, thinking after all the love bombing "Wow! She really loves me." Nope. Stay strong brother, and end your dysfunctional relationship. …
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 11:42 PM
1

Best thing you can do is find all the self help forms online through your local court or state system and start reading the ones that apply to your situation. Most have explanations on what they are used for and if you dig a little deeper you'll find all kinds of self help resources and information for self represented litigants. They make it easy. At the very least, it will educate you on the process so you know what to expect and at best it can save you a ton of money if you file the divorce c…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 10:00 PM
2

No alimony if she can make as much as you do, but voluntarily chooses to become underemployed. In such case, she has no need of alimony. You have everything to gain by going to trial because a judge will have to force feed her the reality of the situation = NO ALIMONY!
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 07:13 PM
3

Appeals are rare in divorce cases so don't worry about it. Ancillary motions means separate cases with a separate case number, like if you get hit with a DV charge or a TRO. See if you what work you can do on your own because that will save you money. For example, the financial disclosures. Ask your attorney how he would prefer it to be organized and do it yourself. Otherwise, you might get hit with a $2500 bill for organizing your discovery into a neat little book, with dividers and tabs, a cov…
/r/Divorce_Men22/11/24 06:35 PM
2

You are in love with the memory of her, not who she is now ... broken, depressed, most likely in poor health and menopausal, divorced, and probably a shit ton of baggage she's accumulated in the last 20 years. You won't be able to fix her and you'll learn real fast that she's picked up some behaviors that are inconsistent with your memory of her. Let it go brother, her best years are far behind her. She left you in her prime, then used up all her best years jumping around from man to man. You ha…
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 11:56 PM
12

Never take back a cheater. She is doing you a favor brother, believe it.
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 08:39 PM
3

4 year marriage? You'll be fine. She isn't getting half of everything you have, just half of the last 4 years. CS is the major expense going forward. She isn't getting alimony or spousal support. The judge will see through her lies and the fact that she went through 3 lawyers shows that she is a difficult and dishonest person. She will be PISSED at the final judgment bc she wants to destroy you, that much is certain. Expect her behavior going forward to be worse as she will always be looking to …
/r/Divorce_Men21/11/24 12:23 AM
3

Especially since she is no longer his spouse. Women lied about being strong, independent and don't need no man! Instead, they rely on men for an early retirement while he works his arse off to support her lifestyle. Sick!
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 06:19 PM
3

South Africa is too dangerous, and it's a failing government. Ghana is a third world dystopia and a massive drop in quality of life from Germany. There are many, many other, far superior and safer places to relocate.
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/24 06:17 PM
1

Either way, just expect your wife to litigate everything that is theoretically in her favor. It would only be surprising if she was reasonable and decided not to litigate the issue that will likely burn up all the money she'd get anyway. This is how they think: if she can't have it, neither can you and she'd rather burn it to the ground and waste money to prevent you from benefitting a penny more than her. Typical situation.
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 06:29 PM
1

Because you were specific with your post nup as to the identity of the first home, and you didn't update it to apply to the second home, then there is very little chance a CA court is going to apply it to your current home that wasn't mentioned in the post nup. Besides that, post nups are even more susceptible to being tossed than prenups, so it is an uphill battle either way. Don't worry, you'll find plenty of attorneys who will advise you that it is a slam dunk and you'll win, but at the end o…
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 05:31 PM
2

Smart move, but your wife will need to hear the truth from her own attorney. It is unlikely she'll trust anything your attorney says. OTOH, if your attorney can assist with the communication of the truth by providing you with the specific laws and court decisions that show clearly that a very short term marriage of less than 2 years is insufficient to establish alimony or spousal support, then your wife may actually listen, especially if she can corroborate the info with an attorney of her choos…
/r/Divorce_Men19/11/24 02:59 PM
5

Reminds me of that Kenny Rogers song, "You picked the right time to leave me, Lucille" because she now will fortuitously benefit for many YEARS from your promotion, and all future promotions, with a higher CS and Alimony payment. If what you report is accurate, it's over brother. She checked out. She doesn't love or respect you anymore and sticking around will make it worse as she simmers with ever increasing resentment every day, which will turn into an epic acrimonious divorce in the near futu…
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 05:02 PM
3

If your lawyers are incapable of settling this case without mediation, they are failures. Bringing a third lawyer into the equation (the mediator) will not change their inability to see the middle ground and amicably resolve the case. Instead, the hard lines in the sand will remain, and you will be paying double fees to go to a mediation that resolves nothing. Lawyers are good at ginning up negative emotions and delaying settlements until they bleed you dry, and then when you run out of money th…
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 02:27 PM
8

She needs to hear it from an attorney that she's not getting alimony or health insurance for a very, very short term marriage of less than 2 years. You won't be able to amicably work this out without lawyers until she comes to that conclusion. So lawyer up now, it is worth the investment to end your charade of a marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men18/11/24 02:21 PM
5

If you love your children, you will NOT unalive yourself because you will be sentencing them to 10x the heartbreak you are now experience that they will have to live with for the rest of their lives, perhaps even causing one or more of your children to unalive themself too. Stop talking crazy talk and get to work on being the best dad you can be. Oh, and never outsource your happiness to anyone every again, especially a woman.
/r/Divorce_Men17/11/24 08:48 PM
7

Don't eat the taxes after cashing out your 401k! Taxes are a marital debt subject to equal division between the parties, and thus another chip on the table for negotiation. If you cashed out a 401k in anticipation of resolving your divorce and you went to trial instead, your wife would be on the hook for 1/2 those taxes. Also, the $150k in equity is another windfall for her because it doesn't take into account the closing costs you alone would have to pay if you decided to sell the house later. …
/r/Divorce_Men16/11/24 02:26 PM
5

It's standard. Whatever is not asked for it in the initial divorce petition is waived. Textbook lawyer move, nothing to worry about considering your financial circumstances. She isn't getting alimony or CS so long as your time with the kids is pretty close to 50/50.
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/24 10:55 PM
1

She wants a visitation schedule that relegates you to a babysitter on the weekends so she can party like it's 1999 every weekend. Has she got a mommy makeover yet? My brother's wife did right before she filed, putting him on the hook for half the debt she charged for a vaginaplasty (livestreamed on tiktok), new tiddies, liposuction, botox, braces, teeth whitening, a facelift, and a tummy tuck.
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/24 04:15 PM
2

Unfortunately, your wife will not listen to a word you say as she doesn't respect you or your opinion anymore. Instead, she's outsourced all advice and counsel to her friends/family/lawyer who are now telling her what to do. There's nothing that can be done about that, but you can start filing the necessary paperwork to start litigating the issue, which will end up costing tens of thousands of dollars and, you are right, a total breakdown of an amicable parenting relationship for the future. Bit…
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/24 04:07 PM
21

A man without hope and a purpose is a man who is barely existing. Most of us have put all our hope and purpose into our marriages and created a FALSE SENSE OF IDENTITY. We got it completely backwards by exchanging our true identity for the married man held captive by a whimsical woman whose last place in the world is a leader in a marriage. It just doesn't work like that. The weaker cannot rule the stronger, and you've let yourself become weak. Were you weak before you met your ex? Of course not…
/r/Divorce_Men15/11/24 02:12 AM
2

A part time working wife will need to work full time after divorce in almost every situation. A stay at home wife will need to work full time after a divorce. I wouldn't agree to alimony until there is a plan in place for her to become employed full time, and then I'd taper the alimony off in proportion to her increasing employment status. Alimony can be modified by a change in circumstances and if you aren't careful with the settlement language so keep that in mind. What assets do you have? You…
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/24 10:18 PM
6

Nothing at all, especially if she is expecting a gift.
/r/Divorce_Men14/11/24 10:07 PM
1

Punching a tree is the fastest way to disabuse yourself of the need to destroy shit.
/r/Divorce_Men13/11/24 12:57 AM
1

In general, the results of a divorce will lower a man's FICO score due to joint accounts being mismanaged by a wife's out of control spending habits, additional financial responsibilities due to alimony and CS, closing lines of joint credit, having less disposable income to service debt ... I could go on. You are free to believe that a man's FICO score can somehow be increased from a divorce, but you'd be wrong again.
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 10:44 PM
3

Be her Plan B if you want, but she's already stepped out on the marriage banging multiple dudes, not to mention the copious amounts of filthy disrespectful behavior she's thrown at you. Finish the divorce, and THEN consider "dating" her if you must, but don't be a foolish simp and allow yourself to be cuckolded. You'll regret betraying your own values more than anything if you take her back, though not sure why that thought is even entering your mind considering how demeaning in word and actions…
/r/Divorce_Men12/11/24 12:50 PM
2

Never take legal advice from your enemy in a legal battle. That's the first thing to stop doing. Her written promises to you mean nothing in a future divorce proceeding. Get a lawyer and stop simping to this woman!
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 01:02 PM
4

Just tell her you are broke and ask her to give you some money to help with the mortgage. She'll be gone like a fart in a hurricane. Making your wife think the divorce is her idea is the best way, brother! I said the "I'm broke" line and two weeks later she had divorce papers for me when she picked me up from the airport after a business trip.
/r/Divorce_Men11/11/24 12:35 PM
1

"While the judge agreed to those points in court, she never put them in writing, and now that I’m moving to a new address, the school is asking for a formal judgment. Upon reviewing the judgment, I realized it wasn’t included in the official order, which is a problem." That is a problem and as a lawyer, you should have known better. But as a lawyer, you were smart enough to hire an attorney to represent you, right? RIGHT??!! In which case, that's a problem for the lawyer you hired. Get him back …
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 08:09 PM
4

Sounds like she wears the pants and is a bully boss babe. She's better suited for a soyboi so see if you can get your balls back because the next 4 years are going to be awesome!
/r/Divorce_Men08/11/24 07:51 PM
3

What state are you in?
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 03:40 PM
4

The risk of a legal consequence for looking at Apple cloud communications, which is a marital asset shared by both parties, is practically zero. Like putting a GPS on the marital motor vehicle titled in both names cannot later be used as evidence of stalking. However, the mental anguish from seeing the private communications between your wife and her paramour is a certainty that will haunt you for the rest of your life.
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 02:31 PM
2

If you are trading assets in return for no child support ever, you are being deceived. CS is dependent upon income and time sharing, with additional obligations of daycare, health insurance, extracurricular activities, and sometimes college or life insurance to secure the CS in case of death. It would help if you could state what the CS Guidelines require you to pay under the circumstances, otherwise you are just shouting into the void.
/r/Divorce_Men07/11/24 02:07 PM
1

Hopefully this will be your last attempt at contact because if you truly wish him well and happiness, you will give him the peace he deserves and never contact him again. It's very selfish and harmful behavior to infringe on the peace of a man who simply wants to be left alone and forget you ever existed.
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 08:36 PM
2

My half sister asked me why I didn't visit more often and I told her the truth in that I was not comfortable around her dad, who beat the shit out of me when I was a child and treated me cruelly. She never spoke to me again, and my mom was angry with me for telling the truth saying, "That's their DAD!" Yeah, so what? My mom never said a kind word about my own father in my entire life. Why should it be my sole burden to be expected to conceal an uncomfortable truth about my stepdad for the rest o…
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 04:56 PM
5

Cheaters have no respect for their spouses, and even less love for them. Your wife hates you, and has no care in the world for blowing up your life, and also the life of another married woman. She's cruel, manipulating, and calculating; selfish, self centered, and self righteous. Obviously, you'll never trust her again, something she knew would be the result of sucking and getting pegged by some other dude but she did it anyway countless times, while lying to your face with a smile on hers. Lawy…
/r/Divorce_Men05/11/24 02:06 PM
6

"I did put her on the deed recently, but from her lawyer and mine apparently that doesn't really make a difference since it was done after the affair and also after my will was updated to exclude her until / if things were sorted around that same time." You need to find another lawyer because putting her on the deed constitutes a conveyance of 1/2 of your property interest, and she is now the proud owner of 1/2 your property. A good lawyer would have advised you to NEVER comingle premarital asse…
/r/Divorce_Men04/11/24 04:19 PM
6

Your indifference is causing her to sperg and spiral. Keep it up.
/r/Divorce_Men30/10/24 02:54 PM
0

Could be her defense mechanism to cover up cheating. It's very common because in order to cheat, she'd have to lose respect for you, which in turn manifests into disrespectful behavior at home that justifies her cheating. People don't change their personality out of the blue for no reason. You have a right to be suspicious and should be.
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/24 04:02 PM
6

Forgiveness just means you as the betrayed partner has to pretend it never happened. Reconciliation means the cheater will forget it ever happened (not that she need permission). What a relief for the cheater!! You get no such relief. Your marriage is over brother. Listen to your gut and GTFO, else you are going to suffer from anxiety, depression, distrust, low self esteem, lack of confidence, feeling unsafe, and then be gaslighted for the rest of your life.
/r/Divorce_Men28/10/24 01:08 AM
7

Yes, she is getting alimony unless you can convince her otherwise and resolve it without lawyers. Once she gets a lawyer, however, you'll be paying her attorney fees too. Expect any lawyer she gets to sniff out the fact that you have a lot of resources, which in turn will cause that lawyer to play on your wife's negative emotions so that the lawyer can litigate everything to the max, and be contentious as hell with no compromising. It's a huge windfall for a lawyer to get a client like your wife…
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 10:18 PM
2

Not if he uses it all for himself. I'm not suggesting he hand her over stacks of cash. That would be stupid. The penalty is less than the 50% he'd have to give her in the divorce. It just needs to be done before filing.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 12:16 PM
6

So true. My brother lamented all the time about not having enough money. I said, dude, more money will NOT fix her spending habits because she will just elect to buy higher ticket items. Instead of a Mazda SUV, she'll upgrade to a Land Rover. Make more money and you can afford that mansion on the golf course. You can never make enough to satiate these women!
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 01:40 AM
7

Your wife is wearing the pants in your marriage. If you can get your pants back and lead as is your natural right, you may be able to save your marriage. If not, divorce and consider cashing out your 401k first so you can stick her with half the tax bill.
/r/Divorce_Men26/10/24 01:37 AM
9

Poly, open marriages, threesomes, and clandestine affairs are all names for the same thing: swinging. It's disgusting and has no place in a marriage, especially if you have or want children. I don't know why a woman would want to get married and then try to manipulate her husband into one of these iterations of swinging when it was never part of the deal, but it is not uncommon.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 06:41 PM
2

Stirred, not shaken
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 04:31 PM
3

A legal prenup already exists, it just sucks donkey balls for men since the de facto prenup in the law favors women, which is a major reason women throw a hissy fit when you want your own prenup (unless they make more money than you in which case she'll demand a prenup)
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 04:04 PM
2

You got bad advice and you should file a bar complaint against your attorney because he instructed you to violate a valid court order and hasn't even filed any motion to appeal it, and certainly hasn't received any order staying the decision that specifically no longer requires you to pay spousal support, which is a very doubtful outcome given that the same judge who ordered it is unlikely to reverse himself.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 02:22 PM
1

That guy did not put his wife's name on the deed whereas you did.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 01:43 PM
2

You put her on the title so she's going to get half the equity, just as if the roles were reversed. The easier way to "make it easy if something happens to you" is to simply put the home in a revocable trust, which you control 100% and therefore remain the sole owner of the home. In such a case, you wouldn't have to split the equity in a divorce. Putting any woman's name on the deed of a pre marital asset is always a terrible idea that will cost you dearly sooner or later.
/r/Divorce_Men25/10/24 01:41 PM
3

My ex would get mad at me for not drinking during the day! Well, I'm not a day drinker and that was a favorite pastime of hers on the weekend. She would get black out drunk and fall on her face or need me to carry her to the car to go home, and the next day claim she didn't remember anything. I was embarrassed to be around it, and definitely not proud she was my wife. She seemed to need alcohol to function in social situations and required it as part of her lifestyle. Although there were many ot…
/r/Divorce_Men24/10/24 05:35 PM
2

On the Shortness of Life - Seneca The Golden Sayings of Epictetus Meditations - Marcus Aurelius Psycho Cybernetics The Manipulated Man Boundaries
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 09:25 PM
1

The only lawyer you need is maybe a bankruptcy attorney. Go to counseling. Seek financial advice to try to get out of debt. Being poor is not a virtue, and getting divorced just to be poor and lonely isn't a virtue either.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 08:51 PM
0

Cash it out now with the tax hit so she's responsible for half the marital debt of the taxes, then disappear the money into the divorce. You'll come out ahead and she'll get nothing.
/r/Divorce_Men23/10/24 01:24 PM
2

I get it, man. Every situation is different and getting out as unscathed as possible is the ultimate goal. Nobody here is a genius, and all of us are dumbasses to some extent. You are braver than I am to tell your story. Mine is so humiliating that I am frozen in shame to tell it, and the thing is I knew better. You seem like a good man that got out of two bad situations. Learn everything you can about CS by reading the NC law on it, and make sure your attorney includes the specific language in …
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 11:29 PM
1

You married an attorney. Big mistake. Women don't need additional training in arguing, never apologizing, and thinking they are right about everything; the practice of law requires a manly disposition. Her entire identity is wrapped up in being an attorney so there is no getting around that fact, which contributes to her having no hobbies because being an attorney is her hobby. Stop fantasizing about her suffering without you. Not only is that a terrible mental place for you to be in, but it wil…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 10:12 PM
2

CS cannot be negotiated away in most cases if there is an obligation to pay based on the child support guidelines. You are also entitled to 50% of the equity in the home so not sure why you'd be so quick to give that up because you and your kids could use those resources. You should've consulted a lawyer a year ago to help but if you simply want to rubberstamp your cheating wife's unfair demands to settle, any attorney can do that. If you are worried about your cheating STBX getting her grubby h…
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 10:00 PM
3

Is it too late to file for a restraining order? If you had a lawyer that was any good, he would've included language in the order that parenting time is exclusive and may not be interfered with by the other parent, especially after knowing about the DV arrest.
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 07:02 PM
10

Wishing somebody to have a happy, fulfilling, and successful life after they betrayed you, lied, destroyed your finances, and left you on the side of the road is contrary to human nature. My question is why do people feel compelled to hope their enemies and abusers have happy lives?
/r/Divorce_Men22/10/24 01:11 PM
2

Recordings should not be played to the judge if you have a good attorney, especially if taken without your consent or knowledge. There are several evidentiary objections that can be raised to prevent the admission of illegal recordings!
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 07:11 PM
3

Give your dog a laxative before taking her over there. Then you can say she is too stressed out over losing her person and maybe get her back. You are going to bitterly suffer if you let her take your dog!
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 07:07 PM
24

No man can compete with the attention and validation women receive on social media. Compared to the 1000 compliments she gets every day on line, your heartfelt comment that "she looks hot" means nothing to her. Unlike the validation on social media, it won't even make her moist, and most likely will have an evaporating effect. Most women will spend more time and energy cultivating their online personality than in investing in a real relationship, which is simply another transaction for more atte…
/r/Divorce_Men21/10/24 06:57 PM
18

If there was no possibility of a judge ordering you to return the $50K GIFT you were given for the down payment of your house, then it shouldn't be included in any settlement negotiation or agreement. Absent a written promissory note secured by a mortgage filed in the public records, the $50k is a GIFT! Transactions involving real estate requires all the parts to be in writing!!! Google the Statute of Frauds. That said, there are many moving parts to a divorce and chips on the table can be rearr…
/r/Divorce_Men20/10/24 01:20 AM
3

Sounds like you don't have a lawyer, which is rarely a good idea even in uncontested divorces.
/r/Divorce_Men19/10/24 12:17 PM
3

You forgot about paying her attorney fees because you'll be on the hook for that too given the massive disparity in income right now. CS can and will be modified in the future when she starts working full time, but in the meantime minimum wage for your state should be imputed to her before making CS calculations. If she was a higher income earner, you may benefit from retaining a vocational expert to assess her income if gainfully employed in her field and impute even more income to her for CS p…
/r/Divorce_Men18/10/24 10:44 PM
4

Why is it when a lying cheating wife betrays her husband, the man is compelled to say something along the lines of "I was not a perfect husband and at the time was working alot and wasn't always there for her physically or emotionally"??? Because their deceptive wife is a master at manipulation and gaslighting, making the husband feel like he somehow contributed to the cheating, when nothing can be further from the truth. Never take back a cheater. Just rip the band aid off and send her to the s…
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 04:25 PM
8

Judges only get mad if you point out that she's a liar and committing perjury in his courtroom. Otherwise, they ignore it.
/r/Divorce_Men17/10/24 03:48 PM
1

There's no incentive for her to leave so expect her to continue living in it while dragging out the divorce to maintain status quo for as long as possible. Since nothing has been done in the last year to move forward and you are paying all the bills, you can expect another 2 years before closing at the minimum, probably more because she is intentionally slow rolling the process. You'll need a final judgment, which is usually issued 1-3 months after the final hearing, and that will give her an ad…
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 09:38 PM
5

Talk to your lawyer, but you'll be able to recoup your loss from her IRS scam once the judge intervenes. No recourse with the IRS but a judge can find her in contempt and enforce the judgment. Be glad you caught her taking all the exemptions because there is no quicker way to get an audit from the IRS than by taking double, unauthorized deductions.
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 08:11 PM
3

How is it going to your kids if your STBX is moving out of the country?
/r/Divorce_Men16/10/24 12:42 PM
4

Definitely, 100% get a lawyer. Do NOT sign anything without your lawyer's approval and knowing all your rights and what you are waiving. Do NOT be Mr. Nice Guy and give her a more favorable result than if the roles were reversed. Stick to your guns and do not settle for anything less than 100% of what the law provides for CS, Alimony, and division of marital assets, including retirement plans. How long were you married btw, and what state are you in?
/r/Divorce_Men15/10/24 05:16 PM
4

Have the police there when you go to pick up YOUR child from a babysitter.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 05:04 PM
8

Not sure even that level of extreme frugality can offset the destruction of the dollar and the insidious theft of purchasing power via inflation.
/r/Divorce_Men14/10/24 03:40 PM
15

You should get married asap as it sounds like you haven't learned your lesson yet about the dangers of having a marriage license, which confers zero benefit on a man who will in the fullness of time assume all the financial and emotional risk.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/24 11:41 PM
1

50% of the house sale AT THE TIME OF CLOSING, not the date of the settlement agreement. Both pay 1/2 closing costs AND 1/2 of reasonable and necessary costs to get the house ready for listing. Talk to your attorney, but you should get credit for paying CS and let the wife redirect those monies to the mortgage payment. Alimony should always be negotiated away, if possible, but if not limited to a very low number and with a set termination date. Good luck.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/24 09:50 PM
11

If she doesn't have any scratch marks, then you have a good chance of the charges being dropped. She'll probably follow up this false DV 911 call with another, even worse false DV claim when she files for a permanent injunction against DV. It's worse because it is permanent, you lose 1st amendment rights, and you'll be under the threat of going to jail any time she wants to lie again. Hopefully she wasn't smart enough to scratch herself and have the police take pictures of her alleged injuries. …
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 11:57 PM
3

They all do but we know the truth.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 08:00 PM
9

"No infidelity was involved" Don't be so sure. At the very least she was fantasizing about getting her back blown out by strange cock. "She wants to be “happy “ ... She feels she missed out on some freedom when she was younger." Translation = she wants to ride the cock carousel. Happiness = new cock. "Divorce not finalized but she already has a boyfriend." And there it is. Or shall we say, there he is, finally unmasked when it is safe to hide behind plausible deniability. You are right about the…
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 07:58 PM
1

I'd rather have the $400k house because it is a tax free asset and liquid.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 02:15 PM
3

It's manipulation, mental abuse, and a lie. Typical in these situations, but mostly occur prior to filing for divorce. If you are truly concerned, file to have her involuntarily committed under the fact that she's a danger to herself or others. Maybe the state can stabilize her with drugs or even better, shock therapy.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 01:54 PM
5

You have to make it fun for her to be there and make the fun a central part of your place. Buy a playstation/board games and find games you can play together. Learn to make pizza together and other fan favorite foods. Watch movies together. Bake cookies and cakes. Get a dog. Find out if she's interested in learning how to play an instrument and set that up. Get her help in decorating the place.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 12:37 PM
7

Better put a clause in that agreement to keep the AP from immediately moving into your house OR spending the night. Because that's is exactly what she is angling for.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 12:34 AM
2

If she has an AP, you should be able to sweeten the deal a little better while she is in limerence. Use her desire to expedite the divorce to YOUR advantage. If you sign and agreement that you will leave on 11/1, you will have to leave or you will be in breach of the agreement.
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/24 12:11 AM
2

Retain a lawyer on a credit card, and the debt will be considered marital debt which will be AT LEAST half hers and maybe more to offset her taking marital assets to prevent you from using them to hire a lawyer. Easy.
/r/Divorce_Men11/10/24 04:02 PM
1

The financial transaction must first be completed before she "takes the car", meaning she has to pony up the funds to pay off the car loan so the title can be released to you and you can sign it over to her. If she has no funds to buy the car, then NO DEAL and you keep the car. Easy.
/r/Divorce_Men10/10/24 03:34 PM
7

Not worth it. A man would have to be a fool nowadays to get a marriage license from the state and consent to its de facto prenup which will screw him over royally when his wife decides she is no longer happy. Pro tip: you can't make a woman happy.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 08:02 PM
8

"Being at home is like walking on egg shells and i never know if what i say or do will set her off" You'd be better off living in a van by the river.
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 06:58 PM
4

Nothing will happen unless you spend thousands on an attorney (previous attorney not obligated to represent you) and drag her ass to court, at which time the judge will listen to her sob story, hear her cry, and grant at least a 6 month extension. When the additional six months are up, you'll repeat the process. Hope you had a good lawyer that included language in the order and settlement agreement that your attorney fees will be paid by your ex if you have to return to court and enforce the jud…
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 01:12 PM
3

Alimony is going to gut your financial future, and be a substantial permanent windfall for your STBX. She will have no worries paying for a place of her own and taking care of bills. That will be your worry, and your burden, to keep her financially stable. Alimony is indentured servitude and should be illegal
/r/Divorce_Men09/10/24 01:00 PM
5

Tell her you are broke and might need some help paying bills next month. She'll be gone like a fart in a hurricane.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 09:52 PM
5

Refinance or sell are the only reasonably viable options to protect yourself. Be prepared for a temper tantrum and for your wife to rip the mask of a "friendly" divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/24 01:38 PM
3

Without a prenup, assuming you are married, an unequal ownership interest in jointly owned marital home will not hold up divorce court court. Her deposit is simply a commingling of assets, and may be construed as a gift, regardless of the language stated on the deed in which she is seeking to substitute for a legitimate prenup. You need a lawyer asap.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/24 09:52 PM
9

She's comparing you to her boyfriend, it's the only thing that makes sense. The sex is more fun, exciting, new, adventurous, whatever ... but she's bang banging another dude. Unless you have 100% proof beyond a shadow of a doubt, she'll never admit it. Cheaters lie, and they are very good at covering their tracks, which is another element of excitement she gets from banging another dude on the side - the risk of getting caught makes it so much more fun. Your gut is telling you the same thing, ob…
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/24 09:18 PM
15

She's lost all respect for you, and intentional behaves in a way where she doesn't even want you to trust her. You can't fix this, and it is clear she doesn't want to fix anything. It's over, brother. Retain an attorney.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/24 03:08 PM
5

Lawyer up ASAP, like yesterday, or suffer the consequences. All your concerns can and will be addressed by your attorney. I hope you haven't signed anything.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 04:36 PM
6

I learned that once you see the light, it's time to sing the Hallelujah Chorus
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 01:16 AM
3

Right, but you said that your wife advised that she wants the kids to finish out the school year where you are at. Ergo, 2 months to secure jurisdiction is nothing. Bite your tongue and put your poker face on until jurisdiction is established! Meanwhile, retain a lawyer and drill down this strategy so that on the 181st day you file for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/24 12:41 AM
10

You are in denial, which is understandable when your world collapses. When a woman asks for a divorce, you've got to believe her. You may delay it for a time, but once she puts that thought in her mind it is inevitable. Desperately trying to win her back will have the opposite effect as you've become aware. As she was "finding herself" as you say, she was also entertaining the attention and validation of various men because that is what that means. She had motive and opportunity to cheat and lik…
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 04:17 PM
3

The sound of silence is the most beautiful sound in the world, and it is also a reflection of your mental state. Silence is golden. I don't miss the nagging and emotional manipulation one bit.
/r/Divorce_Men05/10/24 01:07 PM
3

Your wife gets 1/3 equity. Easy. Another way to say it is that your wife gets 1/2 the marital equity, which is 2/3 of the marital ownership, half of which is 1/3. Your mother could force the sale of the home via a Partition proceeding right now if she wanted, and collect her 1/3 undivided interest in the property. Language on the deed is important so consult a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 08:00 PM
6

There's a dude waiting in the wings 100%, so you can take comfort in that if you really think it will help. But more to your point: self harm doesn't erase the pain, it just amplifies it by 100x and forces the people who love you to suffer for the rest of their lives (child, parents, siblings, other family, and friends).
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 05:12 PM
0

Okay, Debbie Downvoter (very feminine behavior!), what are the benefits to a man getting a marriage license? You must love the State's prenup, but specifically what provisions do you like the best? Mistakes will be repeated until the lesson is learned. Good luck, you are really going to need it.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 03:35 PM
18

Not rewriting the past, she's always felt that way. Women get married thinking they will change a man whereas a man gets married hoping his wife won't change.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:28 PM
-2

You'd be an absolute fool to get a marriage license again. How can you not see that?
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:23 PM
9

Sounds like you are seeking a woman to make you happy or to "complete you." Women can smell a simp co-dependent a mile away even if you try to conceal it. It's a bad idea to invest your happiness into another person, brother. Get to the point where you don't need female validation to feel happy. It's a much better way, you'll see.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:20 PM
6

When a woman says she wants a divorce, believe her. Good news is you want one too because your dysfunctional marriage is literally killing you.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:16 PM
7

Cash out your 401k and stick her with half the tax bill before you file for divorce so a judge can assign her half the tax bill in equitably dividing a marital debt.
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/24 01:12 PM
11

Total physical exhaustion everyday and twice on Sunday is the quickest way through it. Set a physical fitness goal and work towards it. Eat healthy. Do NOT drink or use drugs during this time. Learn to meditate as that will give you control over your mind and thoughts. Read Marcus Aurelius "Meditations" and put it into practice. Epictetus and Seneca. Set other goals. Buy a Power of Habit journal from Amazon and put your new life goals into daily practice. Create new goals and give yourself hope …
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 07:41 PM
2

Get a lawyer if you want to be listened to by her and her attorney. Otherwise, dig in and expect to go to a trial over every single issue, both big and small. They aren't going to settle so might as well let the judge decide everything.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 02:04 PM
7

Women of ill repute who live like street walkers but give away the P for free is actually the norm nowadays, sadly. There's no future with a woman like that so just take your turn and bang bang smash smash.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/24 01:53 PM
8

Don't lie to your son, ever. It is better to say nothing at all than to lie, especially to cover up the indiscretions of a person who utterly betrayed you. No surprise that a cheater wants you to LIE as if it were nothing, but focus on YOUR morals and virtue. That said, a 5 year old is way too young to explain adult matters to.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 05:30 PM
0

Right. He gave up his career to further yours and now you are bitter because the law requires he gets at least half of your retirement and an equalizing amount of your income going forward as spousal support, and 1/2 the value of any assets you thought you bought just for yourself and your own enjoyment. I suppose you don't like it so much now that the shoe is on the other foot, which only occurs in about 1% of the time, but we men won't be holding breath that you'll do a single thing to change …
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 04:58 PM
2

How much more money do you make than your husband?
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 01:11 PM
3

There is zero benefit for a man obtaining a "marriage license" and submitting himself to the indiscretions of a stranger in a black dress to distribute YOUR ASSETS in the very, very likely event your wife becomes unhappy and divorces your naive ass. But many a man thought the rules of life don't apply to them and get married anyway. They REFUSE to listen to their gut. Then they cry like little bitches when the divorce destroys everything they held dear in life. Which way way for you brother?
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/24 01:06 PM
3

Marriage vows do not mean anything more than being in a non-married committed relationship. Girlfriend or wife, it makes no difference when she isn't happy anymore and needs another court jester to entertain them because your jokes got stale or Tyrone showed up with better vibes. Vows mean 1000x more to men than women. There's no magic paper, just as there is no magic dirt. It is what it is fellas.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 05:08 PM
4

Probably the last thing you should be thinking about right now is dating. You'll need to get your mind straight and deal with all the mental health gremlins from a dysfunctional marriage before you'll be attractive to women again, but at 50+ there isn't that much out there for you brother. Lots of baggage, lots of miles driven, and a stable of men that have stood in line waiting for their turn without flowers until you show up with a dozen roses to show her you are serious. That's just the reali…
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 03:17 PM
1

Should've cashed out your 401k and stuck her with half the tax bill, but it might not be too late if you need the funds for attorney fees. Get creative!
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/24 03:09 PM
2

She's paying child support. Get a lawyer to force feed her that fact.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 06:41 PM
1

It might not be too late to cash out your 401k and stick her with half the tax bill so long as you use it for attorney fees. I doubt a judge will malign you for hiring a lawyer with the only reasonable means you have at your disposal to pay for one.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 04:51 PM
1

You must be a career boss babe because you act like one. Control your emotions by concentrating of the facts!
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/24 04:45 PM
6

There are two sides to every story: hers and the truth.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/24 04:36 PM
5

Sperm donor with a special obligation to pay child support every month for 19 years!
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 02:58 PM
22

She's banging some guy, probably at work, and wants to keep you on the back burner in case it doesn't work out for her. You are her safety net. Mr. Reliable. Mr. I'm Shocked. Mr. Begging Her to Stay. Mr. I Can Change. She's a cake eater. Hopefully you can get child support and alimony from her. TALK TO A LAWYER, otherwise she'll have the tactical advantage and you'll sign anything she puts in front of you because you are Mr. Agreeable. Mr. Indifferent should be your goal now. It's all business f…
/r/Divorce_Men23/09/24 02:35 PM
17

Sympathy for the Devil isn't a good idea, but it is a great song!
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/24 09:38 PM
7

Cash out your 401k "for the house" and stick her with half the taxes on it, otherwise she'll get half of it tax free.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 12:41 PM
3

"I tried to make her happy admittedly to my detriment. I don’t understand." Your job isn't to make anyone happy because that is impossible to sustain over time. An unhappy person will remain unhappy until they choose to make themselves happy. If an unhappy woman has no desire to do the work and instead relies on cheap thrills and a husband who she expects to act like a court jester for her entertainment, she'll be the end of your mental health in no time at all. Unhappy women are very efficient …
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 12:34 PM
-4

"My husband was my best friend, my lover, companion, my better half. We finished ea other sentences and loved him with all my heart. It all came crashing on Aug 1st. ... "I am sick of him being at home but he doesn't want to leave" Welp, that escalated quickly.
/r/Divorce_Men21/09/24 12:27 PM
10

Once a cheater, always a cheater. Taking back a cheater just tells her it's all right to cheat so she'll do it again. And again. And again. When you catch a cheater, it is always the first time she ever cheated! What are the odds? "Leave a Cheater, Gain a Life" is a great book for anyone who's been cheated on.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 08:30 PM
1

Or just ensure it is a non-revocable trust. You are correct though to be wary of relying on tenuous relationships in expecting an inheritance. Even more so than divorce, death brings out the worst in people who think they are entitled to someone else's money.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 02:33 PM
1

What state is the divorce filed in? If it isn't in Maine, you are under no obligation to consent to her unilateral move. As far as how nasty it will get goes, you haven't seen anything yet if even half of what you are reporting is true.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 02:30 PM
2

Well, she's checked out and told you she was done with being married to you so definitely believe that. She's already banging someone else, probably multiple Chad and Tyrones. Chances are you don't have much to split up or fight over with a short term 1 year marriage so the divorce process should be pretty easy. You're a lawyer and should therefore be able to navigate the pro se divorce forms rather easily so find the uncontested divorce forms, fill them out, and get your life back on track afte…
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 12:44 PM
5

Meds only make BPD and narcissism worse, especially the anti depressants because they cauterize a woman's emotions so they don't feel anything at all. It prevents women from having a natural, internal accountability of their conscience, and turns them into even worse sociopaths. You can still see the sadness in their dead eyes though, behind their blank, emotionless stares, which results in them acting quite masculine. Never, ever date a woman on anti-depressants! The greatest of all red flags!!
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 12:37 PM
3

Surrender your tags to the DMV, or report them stolen. Then cancel insurance. Easy.
/r/Divorce_Men20/09/24 12:13 AM
26

Sounds like what a woman would say, tbh. There must be more to the story, but you merely feeling "unhappy" doesn't seem like a divorce situation with a wife you call a good person and a good mother.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 11:11 PM
6

Awesome brother! Don't you ever forget that she tried to financially destroy you behind your back!! She isn't your friend so do NOT trust her. Don't show any sympathy either, else she'll see it as a weakness and use it to manipulate you. Also, watch your back because most women who lose a financial hearing want revenge and escalate things by making false DV claims to kick you out of the house and lock you up! Keep crushing it brother!
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 11:03 PM
2

Suck it up or you will be paying alimony for the rest of your life. Worst case scenario is you rent a room for a while, or buy an RV and camp by the river, which you can sell when you are done using it.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 02:55 PM
3

Obviously as a woman you would say that you prefer the State's de facto prenup because it 100% favors you and future life choices. It is a safety net for you alone so why change it? To any reasonable man, it is a HUGE red flag that you don't to level the playing field with a more fair prenup. We don't want to marry a woman if she does things like this: jealously guarding her prenup!! "My way or the highway!" boss babe insisting on a safety net! Hard pass. There's no reason for a man to get marri…
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 02:17 PM
6

Inheritances are non-marital property. House could go to him directly, but better transfer would be to a trust to avoid the appearance of commingling assets and giving the wife a claim to increase in equity of the marital home.
/r/Divorce_Men19/09/24 01:49 PM
2

"She is jealous and withholds her from me out of spite" Many such cases. You won't be able to reason with her so don't waste your time. Stop being "nice" by allowing her to dictate the conversation and parenting schedule/duties. Instead, you'll have to force feed her by dragging her to court with a motion to enforce the final judgment that ordered 50/50. Since she has been intentionally withholding the time with your daughter that was ordered by the court, there may be a civil contempt issue you…
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 11:26 PM
4

She was using and manipulating you to get a favorable settlement in the divorce. It happens as much as the fact that they ALWAYS have a few guys lined up to go balls deep when they ask for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 05:00 PM
2

She wants a mediator, which is fine. The "we don't need a lawyer" part is not fine. You need a lawyer, and if you listen to her and don't get a lawyer then you deserve to be screwed in your divorce. See how that works? She's projecting that YOU want to screw her over while the truth is that SHE is actively working an angle to screw you over by not hiring a lawyer who will assist you in dividing the assets and liabilities fair and square as the law requires. Hire a lawyer and do NOT sign anything…
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/24 12:19 PM
3

She'll be nasty, you can count on that, especially since she is going to have to probably pay alimony and your health insurance. A typical woman seeking a divorce under these circumstances will go scorched earth and try to destroy you while burning up all the marital assets she can to prevent you from getting anything at all. If you haven't experience the real her yet, you are about to because the mask is coming off. Cash out your 401k so you can at least stick her with 1/2 the tax bill. Good lu…
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 10:47 PM
3

BOAT = Bust Out Another Thousand
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 02:52 PM
18

If you have been there less than 6 months then your home state is still your residence for divorce purposes. Hurry up and move back, file there, and the court will order your kids to return.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/24 11:46 AM
1

"turned a $16k inheritance into over $10M." An inheritance is non-marital property so if you were smart enough to never commingle your brokerage account (or other investments) by putting your wife's name on any of the accounts, then it is all yours. How poetically just would that be? Please tell me you were that smart. In my trust, I state as a precaution that any disbursement to a beneficiary is a non marital asset and it shall not be commingled with marital assets/accounts. Furthermore, if any…
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/24 12:55 AM
4

Why marry when there is zero benefit for a man? Voluntarily applying for a marriage license and giving up power over your own life to the State as soon as your wife is "unhappy" is utter foolishness.
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 11:33 PM
1

Your STBX should be on the hook for a good portion of your attorney fees. Make sure your current attorney doesn't drop the ball!
/r/Divorce_Men15/09/24 11:23 AM
4

You shouldn't have got married because there is zero benefit in it for a man to sign a one way contract with the State, and men assume all the risk. Hope you have a prenup.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 07:47 PM
1

$700k in legal fees is proof that bill will never be paid in full, and that the attorney billing these hours doesn't expect it to be paid either.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 06:05 PM
5

Or just hire an escort and save the time, exhaustion, and most importantly, money. You are paying for it one way or another, so might as well hire an expert!
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 02:50 PM
2

Ignore, block, and start communicating only on one of those parenting apps. Have you ever won an argument with this woman, married or divorce? Well, you aren't going to win this one either. Let her pay to go to court. It's a waste of time and she'll lose, but if she files make sure you try to have your CS reduced at the same time. She's jealous of your new life and wants to make you miserable. Typical scorned woman behavior.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 02:09 PM
3

It is unethical for an attorney to work on contingency in a divorce, but this is a gray area where the goalposts are moved and it is called marital debt. No divorce attorney works for free, and no divorce attorney waits to get paid until there is a judgment forcing the other party to pay bills, which may never happen. Her attorney is either banging her or she is coming up with some money to pay him from somewhere. The attorney needs to be deposed. There is much more to this story.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 12:22 PM
2

Awesome! Did you stand your ground, go to a final hearing, and force the judge to order that in a final judgment? Or was it a result of mediation or a settlement agreement?
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 01:04 AM
10

If the agreement is signed, then you should be good. But if it isn't signed, then yes you are responsible for 1/2 of marital debt, including debt racked up in her name during the marriage. My brother had to pay for new tiddies, a vaginaplasty, a bleached asshole, braces, a tummy tuck, liposuction, a butt lift, and dating app fees that were all charged after his wife moved out but before she filed for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men14/09/24 12:27 AM
1

Your lawyer sucked to allow your ex to have all this power over you and your time with your daughter.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 11:48 PM
4

I bet making your daughter choose violates the court order and if it doesn't the lawyers and judge suck
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 11:47 PM
7

Cash out your 401k so she can't get half of it, and stick her with 1/2 the taxes due on it instead.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 05:18 PM
9

You may have loved the woman you married but it is doubtful you love the woman she turned into, which is to say the real her: "she spends most of her time out drinking with her new "mean girl" friend group, hooking up with guys, etc. She's in between jobs often and in general just chaos." Do not be deceived.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 03:43 PM
2

Before filing, cash out your 401k's and that will make your STBX responsible for half the tax bill no matter what happens to the money, which could very well be squandered on gambling. She's going to get half of your 401k anyway, and it will be tax free for her in a divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/24 11:11 AM
2

Any explanation she gives won't be believed by you because you'll never be able to understand the motivations of a horrible person who tried to destroy you for her own selfish, psychopathic reasons. Been there, done that. Didn't believe a word of my ex's "explanation" for her horrible behavior, including her plea for me to just "understand." Nope. It just pissed me off more that she had the audacity to try to manipulate me into having any empathy for her whatsoever when she didn't deserve it and…
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/24 12:04 AM
2

She'll find out sooner or later, they always do. 8 months is nothing.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 11:57 PM
6

She wants to destroy you more, hoping she can rope you back in with a slingback.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 11:51 PM
6

Don't stick your hand back in the fire brother! She's showed her true colors and who she really is, but the scary thing is she couldn't even mask it very well when you were married. Lying to the court in order to destroy you is unforgiveable, and unforgettable. Keep NC and if possible, never talk to her again. More important, STOP LOOKING AT HER SOCIAL MEDIA!! Nothing good will come of it for you!!
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 11:23 PM
4

She's not a loyal woman and her life is a charade. Immediately having a child with some new guy she met after divorcing you doesn't change that fact.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 08:15 PM
8

You have to improve your life for YOURSELF, not for any woman. If you continue to outsource your happiness to any other person, you will never find it. You seem like a good guy with a lot going for you so you should be proud of that because your boys need that kind of leader!
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/24 08:02 PM
7

Tell her by filing a petition to modify alimony and child support and having her served. She's just going to argue and berate you if you try to talk to her about it like an adult and appeal to reason. Nothing good can come of it so long as a court has jurisdiction over your life. That's what a marriage and divorce is all about: a contract with the State where you have both surrendered your autonomy in deference to a stranger's whimsical decisions that typically destroy a man's life.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/24 12:34 AM
5

File the police report or prove your ex is right that you truly deserve to feel hurt by her shenanigans, which will continue to repeat itself over and over again until YOU are the one kicked out of the house or in jail. This woman is psychologically abusing you and your children as you stand there and let it happen. How can you seriously love a wicked soul destroying person like that is beyond my comprehension. Stop lying to yourself and assume the role of a man who leads for once in your life! …
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 03:51 PM
6

Sucked donkey balls for me and I get along with my ex very well.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/24 02:38 PM
0

Marrying a woman with two children while a law student? Hope you learned your lesson.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 05:43 PM
2

Not true if a settlement agreement they both signed is filed.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 01:32 PM
6

My ex filed, I wrote the settlement agreement, and she went to the final hearing alone. I didn't want to see her again. No kids made that part easy. She rushed home and emailed me a copy of the FJ, which was unnecessary because the court mails it. I don't know if she was looking for some kind of closure or a response, but I just ignored her email and never spoke to her again. I never had to go to court and don't know why anyone would if they could avoid it because you won't leave happy and there…
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 01:30 PM
1

A heroin addict could disappear all your savings in a month. Get into Narcotics Anonymous after you "shoot up" all your savings. Poof. It's all gone and there's nothing left to share.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 01:21 PM
1

You make some good points. Did you get to tell the court all of that prior to its decision?
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/24 12:49 AM
2

After waiting at least 6 months to establish residency so the new state has jurisdiction
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 12:37 AM
13

Make the move before you file for divorce, otherwise the court will impute your $160k/year income as the bare minimum of what you are capable of earning for child support and alimony purposes regardless of whether you can make that or not. In the meantime, find meaning and happiness in your own existence because you are going to be sorely disappointed if you continue to rely on a woman or things for your own happiness.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/24 12:07 AM
2

"She has an excuse for everything and she is always right, she is always the victim." Marriage for a woman means isolating a man all to herself so she can treat him worse than anyone else in her life. Divorce for a man means not putting up with that shit anymore because the wife sure as hell isn't going to apologize and change to make a man happy. Your turn is over brother.
/r/Divorce_Men05/09/24 04:22 PM
4

Never outsource your happiness again brother! Your happiness should NEVER be conditional on another person or thing because it can be taken away in a nanosecond and leave you in hopeless despair as you are experiencing now knowing that it is Chad's turn.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 06:24 PM
4

With such a keen interest and emotional outburst about needing to get paid after a divorce, alimony isn't her safety net. Rather, it is her medium term goal that she will deploy when the statutory minimum requirements for permanent alimony are met. Caveat Emptor brother. Run, and don't look back! Divorcing a woman like this will guarantee your life will be destroyed in a bitter scorched earth divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 05:48 PM
5

She likes the State's de facto prenup written in the law much better, and would much rather marry a man without his own custom prenup. Money and security are a woman's best friends, do not be deceived. A woman's "love" is especially conditional; requiring a woman to sign a prenup that terminates lifelong security and monthly payments when she divorces bc she is no longer happy will dry her up like the Sahara Desert! You had your turn, now it is some other dude's turn.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/24 05:41 PM
12

All love is conditional brother, just as all relationships are transactional. There is no such thing as unconditional love. If a woman tells you she wants out, let her go and do NOT chase. You can't negotiate love or respect, and forcing either is as disingenuous as a cheater being caught in the act and immediately apologizing. In the future, never again outsource your happiness to a woman. "Happy wife, happy life" is a lie. Women can't be happy.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/24 07:23 PM
0

You need to find a hobby that you are passionate about, and let that be your meditation and mental health counselor! It could be restoring a classic car, learning the guitar or any other instrument, learning music theory, cooking, gardening, etc. You could also buy a one person far infrared sauna ($1200 on Amazon) which will do wonders for your anxiety and depression and health.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/24 03:40 PM
6

It's a joint checking account! I'm embarrassed for you that her lies have caused you anxiety over a non-issue! Total nothing burger!
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/24 03:19 PM
6

A mental disability that prevents a wife from working is quite different than the reasoning justifying alimony where it is presumed the wife voluntarily gave up a career to be a SAHM. Of course the courts won't listen to this argument and order alimony in your case anyway, somewhere around $3k/month for at least 15 years and maybe even life. The system is so unfair to men, but fortunately a lot of men are waking up to the fact that there is nothing in it financially to get married ... it is ALL …
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/24 03:12 PM
16

Her personal drama isn't your concern anymore. That's a job for her fiance.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 09:18 PM
13

This is why a man must never store his happiness in other people or things because they can be taken away in a second and cause immediate, debilitating depression. Never outsource your happiness to a woman again!
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 01:05 PM
1

That's easy to fix with a simple email or text saying basically the same thing as when you call any company's customer service: "Any verbal communication with me shall constitute consent to record the conversation"
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/24 12:58 PM
3

Child support can be retroactive, but the real question is has your income significantly increased since the divorce was finalized? Has hers? You should be able to plug the new numbers into a CS worksheet to see if a modification is even warranted.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/24 01:06 PM
17

She told you she wanted a divorce, moved out, said no to counseling, and that she's "not happy." Believe her. Do you know what's going to make her happy? Sampling other dicks because she is already on dating apps and lining them up. The light switch is off and you won't be able to turn it back on. That's the harsh reality of female nature. Move on brother, and be grateful you won't be tethered to her for the rest of your life with children.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/24 07:30 PM
16

Most men have been brainwashed through years of relentless propaganda starting before kindergarten to need others in order to be happy, later on the mind manipulation gets more specific to require a man needing a woman to complete himself. The truth is, you do not. Many of the best men in history who made the greatest impact were single, and there is no doubt if they had to daily cater to a woman's whimsical happiness then their great accomplishments would not have ever happened. Take a year off…
/r/Divorce_Men10/08/24 03:05 PM
3

She doesn't respect you brother, and it is time to face that reality. Worse than disrespect, she is going to take it a step further with a calculated and cruel emasculation of you as you do the "pick me dance" while you are cuckolded. Leave this loveless, dysfunctional marriage. Get a lawyer. It's over. She does not love you. There's no coming back from this unless you agreed to an open marriage, and even if you did, why even be married?
/r/Divorce_Men03/08/24 02:33 PM
2

Keep working on yourself brother. You will know that you've arrived when you no longer desire companionship of a woman to feel alive or loved or validated for being you. Instead, love yourself like Jesus told us to do with "Love thy neighbor AS YOURSELF" ... strangely, not one preacher man has ever given a sermon, teaching, or counsel on how to love yourself, but this is the missing ingredient to being entirely fulfilled in life. Did any of the disciples have wives? Jesus didn't. Neither did Pau…
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 02:49 PM
6

You are finally choosing to love yourself and by doing so have broken her spell. There are few things worse than being in a relationship with an angry, entitled woman who needs constant validation due to her selfishness, self-righteousness, and self-centeredness. Free yourself from this Succubus, brother!
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/24 12:04 AM
19

Don't ever get married. There's nothing in it for a man, and you are really going to dislike the State's prenup.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 05:50 PM
9

File for temporary spousal support and include all the facts of financial abuse of her intentionally withholding your right to marital funds to pay bills. It won't be a good look for her, so expect false allegations. Get a lawyer ASAP!!
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/24 04:32 PM
11

A rare case of a deceitful, wicked woman being held accountable. Schadenfreude!
/r/Divorce_Men31/07/24 11:45 AM
3

NY Domestic Relation Law, Sections 230-255: https://newyork.public.law/laws/n.y._domestic_relations_law_section_230
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 10:57 PM
2

Start here then. Read the DIY forms too as they will help you identify the potential issues relevant to your situation. https://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/family/divorceBasics.shtml
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 10:52 PM
2

What state are you in? Type that in the search box first, then "divorce" then "Statutes" and it should pop right up.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 10:48 PM
2

Do you plan on agreeing to that? If not, don't worry about it. You'd do well to read the statutes controlling divorce, child custody, parental responsibilities, visitation, and relocation procedures since it will affect a good portion of your life. It could also save you money because a lawyer is mostly going to repeat some of those laws to you anyway. With more knowledge, you'll be able to ask better questions of your lawyer too, further saving you money while giving you a peace of mind.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 10:06 PM
1

That's not the case. Attorney fees are marital debt, until the final judgment is entered. You have been misinformed.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 07:32 PM
0

Probably a credit card, which immediately puts you on the hook for at least half that debt and probably more.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/24 03:49 PM
6

Sounds like you got a good deal then, until she figures out she got shafted on child support and finds a lawyer to reopen the case and establish CS. She could also go down to the Child Support Enforcement Agency and get a free lawyer to make your life miserable AF. Hopefully, none of that happens and you were also smart enough to get yourself off the mortgage.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 12:49 PM
5

If being a SAHM wasn't something you agreed on before and she unilaterally changed the agreement, then it should be formally memorialized in a post-nup in a fair and just world. So if you really want to spice up your marriage, ask her for a post-nup! Bet she'd divorce you before signing it, and that's how you'll know you are just a resource monkey if you are still in doubt.
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 12:39 PM
15

"I have to walk away from the house equity, in exchange for no child support payments" I hope a lawyer didn't advise that, but I guess it doesn't matter anymore. She would've come out ahead financially no matter how the pie was sliced because that's how the law is designed and that's how women get ahead. She did it to you, and she'll do it again. I've never met a strong, independent, boss babe career woman who 1) didn't work for a man and show her boss more respect than any other man in her life…
/r/Divorce_Men29/07/24 11:32 AM
3

Can't unring that bell, but you'll be hearing those words in your mind forever.
/r/Divorce_Men28/07/24 04:24 PM
2

That's a pipe dream amigo. Give up the fantasy, and do yourself a favor by not even trying to date until you do. It's just delaying your healing.
/r/Divorce_Men27/07/24 12:03 AM
3

Most guys need to be at a point of indifference before they start dating new women because a new girlfriend isn't going to replace the hole in your heart until you've put in the work to have it healed. "It all comes crashing down ..." would be the expected result just 5 months post separation. It takes time to heal brother. Fill up your life with activities, hobbies, and healthy habits that edify the soul, and feed your brain with the wisdom of the sages until it is all you think about. Read and…
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 11:51 PM
3

"I went this route because her intention was to put me on child support when the courts kicked back when we said 0 child support initially." Child support with just a $15k disparity in a $100k combined income isn't going to be very much anyway. Have you done a CS calculation? If she's amenable to everything else, but you are insisting on a nominal CS payment anyway out of spite, it's going to cost you guys at least $20k in attorney fees and unending future conflict from a bitter divorce when it …
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:31 AM
17

The biggest mistakes that you'll ever make in life happen shortly after ignoring your gut when it is screaming at you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:21 AM
20

Didn't ask, didn't care. My turn was over, and that's okay.
/r/Divorce_Men26/07/24 01:18 AM
11

My Red Flags (yours might be different): If she is on any anti-depressants, and/or in lifelong therapy. If she has a flippant attitude towards sex and brags about her sexual partners like one of the boys. Habitually sleeps with men on the first date. If she had cheated. If she's been engaged more than once and terminated the engagements. If she has children (I won't be a stepdad) If she doesn't want or like children If dogs don't like her, or she doesn't like dogs If she is on social media every…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 04:30 PM
3

"Your Time is Gonna Come" -Led Zeppelin
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 10:47 AM
9

Lightswitch Effect The Lightswitch Effect is a phenomenon where a woman, often at the end of a relationship, rewrites the entire history of the relationship, presenting a revised narrative that contradicts her previous feelings and experiences. This phenomenon is characterized by statements such as “I never loved you” or “You were always abusive,” despite having previously expressed affection and commitment. Common scenarios: Revisionist history: Women may downplay or deny the positive aspects o…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 01:04 AM
9

Bitcoin and bounce
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 12:44 AM
1

That used to be the case, but Japan is now an official member of The Hague Convention. Japan is also the vassal state of the USA.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/24 12:43 AM
3

I hope you have a lawyer. Managing the house sale will take some finesse if she is unable to refinance, and not only because your credit won't be available to buy another house until she does (unless you are paying cash of course).
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 10:26 PM
3

The rewards of tolerance are treachery and betrayal.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 06:32 PM
9

You'd have to be a fool to consider getting married it this day and age. Don't marry, instead just enjoy your turn while it lasts because it ain't going to last forever. Even that can be too exhausting. Better plan is to have a fun life on your own terms without the constant nagging and call an escort when the need arises.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/24 02:10 AM
3

Tell him you are taking him skydiving but there is more than a 50% chance the parachute won't open. See how he responds. Then ask him why does he want to get a marriage license if vows can be said on a beach in front of family and friends to equally formalize a committed, monogamous relationship. Finally, ask him what he thinks of a pre-nup. He will likely reply that a pre-nup isn't in the cards because they don't need one. Then tell him that's fine, and that he must have read the state's de fac…
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/24 02:31 PM
3

That's completely normal at her age brother. Just make sure you make her life as magical as possible when you are with her and you'll be fine. Also, be the one who teaches her the milestones in life like riding a bike, swimming, reading, and at her age even potty training. I taught my daughter to use the potty in one day by following her around and annoying her every five minutes with, "Do you have to go potty? Do you have to go potty? C'mon let's go potty!!" After a few hours of that and she sa…
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/24 11:10 PM
5

You are still entitled to half the equity that appreciated in the marital home and maybe other premarital assets if marital funds were used to maintain them. CS deals only with income, but family courts are courts of equity so it won't hurt to ask to take your wife's wealth into consideration.
/r/Divorce_Men19/07/24 02:23 PM
1

That law might be on the books but no prosecutor is going to charge it. For peace of mind, find out when was the last time adultery was charged as a crime! Same law was on the books in Florida until very recently, and no prosecutor would dare charge someone for living in an open state of adultery. Adultery laws are pure morality laws, and we live in an inverted world were bad is good and immorality is moral. Also, they'd have to prove it, and it is questionable whether SC would even have jurisdi…
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 06:07 PM
4

It's definitely a waste of time. You can do all the same negotiating while a divorce is pending and moving forward toward a final hearing, meaning you are guaranteed an end date without dragging the process out. There is no upside to a collaborative divorce. If the parties are allegedly that amenable to an uncontested divorce, start writing the settlement agreement immediately, otherwise start preparing to tell your side of the story to the judge and get ready for trial.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/24 02:34 PM
1

Equitable division happens first, then alimony which usually doesn't take into account the distributed assets. She has a need for alimony and you have the ability to pay, those are the criteria. Between alimony and CS, expect half of your check to be garnished every month. Better bet is getting her back in the work force. She shouldn't be able to retire on your labor for the rest of her life. Another way to handle it is to have her accept a lump sum alimony award and give her more than half of t…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 08:01 PM
1

You could take all that money out of the bank and lose it all in the stock market or gambling or become a victim of a bitcoin scam. These things happen.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 07:56 PM
11

It's crazy how many men are out there desperate to simp for a woman with kids. You can't trust a single thing your ex says, in fact it is better to assume the opposite is true. That will help you deal with it better when the lie manifests itself into reality.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 06:58 PM
14

You are shellshocked right now, but there's no way to save this kind of betrayal. The woman you married is dead and gone forever.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 06:03 PM
4

Sunk cost fallacy The sunk cost fallacy is a cognitive bias that occurs when individuals continue to invest resources (time, money, effort) in a course of action because of the resources already committed, despite the fact that it no longer serves their best interests or provides a positive outcome. This fallacy is based on the premise that committing to the current plan is justified because resources have already been committed. Examples Watching a movie that’s not meeting expectations because …
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 05:56 PM
1

👑
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 04:08 PM
1

A foul statement like that is a statement against the interests of the STBX, and thus isn't hearsay. If she denies saying it, the statement can be brought in as a prior inconsistent statement, which isn't hearsay either. At the end of the day though, judges don't give a crapola and don't want to hear the he said she said dirty laundry, even about kids.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 02:51 PM
6

She's a disgusting human and sounds like a selfish, self-centered, self-righteous, entitled TikTok bitty. She isn't your friend, and it is good to hear you weren't manipulated into continuing a phony, dysfunctional relationship with an immoral woman who betrayed you and stabbed you in the back. She deserves nothing from you other than grey rock, NC except about kids, preferably by text or family app only, and when she inevitably needs your help for something it is your duty to not even care, muc…
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/24 11:19 AM
2

If the required facts are stated in the initial TRO, it MUST be granted as a matter of law. Did you read the statute to see what was required? You must not have stated the requisite facts necessary to cause an ex parte order against DV to be granted. Unless you have new facts, you are wasting your time and money going to court to relitigate your petition which was already denied for being insufficient. Read the statute and see what you left out. I can't believe an attorney would assist with this…
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 09:26 PM
2

Invest in a heavy bag, 16 oz. boxing gloves, and a one person far infrared sauna. You could get it all set up for under $1500. You'll never feel more relaxed than after a few rounds hitting the heavy bag followed by 30 minutes in the sauna.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 08:52 PM
5

No man is more greatly disrespected than by his own wife.
/r/Divorce_Men15/07/24 03:15 PM
2

Will she understand it and how would you even know? She'll never tell you, and you've already demonstrated how much she relied and depended on you throughout your marriage. Doing anything more for her at this point is senseless. You aren't going to get an "atta boy!" from her or see her missing your marital contributions bc she's already got another guy lined up to attend to her every whimsical desire.
/r/Divorce_Men14/07/24 04:21 PM
1

Why are you living in the basement with your tail between your legs? It is because you value money over freedom. It must be hell walking on eggshells all the time.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 03:25 PM
6

I wouldn't wish anyone the best after they blew up my life.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/24 03:20 PM
2

Lawyer is not going to give you any specific answers or advice without establishing an attorney client relationship and you paying a retainer. There's just too much liability on the line. The purpose of the 30 minute t/c is to raise more questions than answers and to impress you with the lawyer's understanding of the process and various hypothetical circumstances that could negatively affect your divorce, which will put you in immediate fear for delaying hiring a lawyer for another moment. That …
/r/Divorce_Men11/07/24 08:53 PM
7

That was her punishment for lying. Judges deal with blatant perjury in like manner, but a judge will never find anyone in criminal contempt of court, give a warning about the criminal penalties of perjury, or refer a perjurer to the district/state attorney for criminal prosecution. That's why people commit perjury so much ... there's rarely any repercussions for it, and even less risk for doing it. Perjury is the most committed crime in America by far, but it is also the least prosecuted crime. …
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 11:13 PM
9

You are divorced so there's no reason to walk on eggshells, and there really isn't any reason to argue over things you cannot control. If the kids are in danger, call CPS and 911. Otherwise, live your best life and be the best dad. And you have 51% custody so that's a MAJOR win, and her loss bc I know she wanted to get more custody. Consider communicating over text or email alone, and drop the need to engage her verbally. Grey rock, poker face, 180, and NC other than about the kids via text. Fuc…
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/24 01:27 AM
1

I state the truth and you project. How long have you been practicing law, Mr. Dunning Kreuger?
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 11:45 PM
1

The Illinois Bar is a professional organization that regulates the practice of law in Illinois. Same in Florida, but the Florida Bar has authority to discipline lawyers for violating professional rules of conduct, like most other states. Illinois is an exception to the generally accepted method of disciplining lawyers through State Bars. Potato, Patahto.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 11:44 PM
1

Professional responsibility means codified ethical rules of conduct that lawyers must follow, violations of which can result in disciplinary proceedings. Violating a few of the rules could also rise to the level of a tort that is actionable in civil court by a plaintiff that can prove monetary damages, such as failing to file a lawsuit before the statute of limitations expires. This is a tort called professional malpractice, which is a civil action that can be filed in civil court, aka a lawsuit…
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 11:29 PM
2

This is false. State Bars are given power by their respective State Supreme Courts to regulate the practice of law, including disciplinary proceedings. State Supreme Courts have little to nothing to do with the day to day regulation of the practice of law.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 11:13 PM
1

you mean professional malpractice
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 11:11 PM
3

Fire that loser and file a bar complaint against him. Get another attorney immediately or you will surely regret it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 09:22 PM
0

A woman mediator is going to be biased for your wife. It's just natural for women to stand up against the patriarchy and get revenge against the evil men. How much you want to bet your mediator is divorced herself?
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 08:22 PM
1

Ask your attorney what work he is doing before then. Like working on a settlement agreement after reaching out to the other side and finding common ground, things that can be negotiated, things that must be taken to a judge, etc. So long as you are in email contact and your attorney is available by phone, you don't really need appointments unless you have a court date and then you can meet right before it.
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 08:15 PM
2

The mediator gets paid by the hour and the clock doesn't start until the mediation begins in almost all mediations. Therefore, aside from a one page summary, the mediator isn't going to read shit before the mediation. They are the most unprepared and uninformed people in the room, and their job is to ferry offers of settlement from one side to the other, present counter offers, and if a settlement is reached, draft a poorly written and incomplete agreement that will be lacking in details you wil…
/r/Divorce_Men08/07/24 08:08 PM
12

My ex said she still loved me as she was filing the divorce paperwork. It just pissed me off because I knew it was manipulative and a lie. A woman who loves and respects you won't even think about divorce, and certainly wouldn't treat you far worse than everyone else she knows in life in a marriage. So I shut that shit down immediately, and fired back a text: "Love? We aren't even friends. Never say that to me again, it's manipulative and I don't believe it for a second." And that was that. We n…
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 11:26 PM
21

She isn't your friend and blew up your life. Why are you still talking to her?
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 11:00 PM
16

Social media isn't a good addiction for any woman, and a married woman consorting with divorced harpies is soon to follow in their footsteps. No man can survive in that relationship. My brother was married for 31 years, and his ex became a cartoonish creature pretending to be 19 again, but not before taking out $30k in marital debt for new titties, liposuction, vaginaplastly trimming of the roast beef flaps after 5 kids, braces, and a bleached asshole, all live streamed on tiktok. It's so fuckin…
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 10:56 PM
1

Love is the most dangerous emotion, according to Socrates.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 03:11 PM
2

Completely normal. Physical attraction can't be negotiated.
/r/Divorce_Men05/07/24 03:09 PM
8

"Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me" is one of worst lies of childhood that many carry into adulthood as a fundamental belief. I hope you don't tell your kids that lie.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/24 12:50 AM
5

Why do these women always turn into demons who go scorched earth? Don't they know it hurts the children, not to mention themselves? Like if they can't be happy then nobody can. Sheesh.
/r/Divorce_Men03/07/24 03:12 PM
2

Get a second opinion. Even in California, the "best interests of the child" standard that guides the court, and judges have a lot of discretion in their decisions because family law courts are courts of equity, the stability and continuity of maintaining the marital home for the benefit of the children is a significant factor, especially when the home is within a favorable school district, the kids have a network of friends in the neighborhood, and, most importantly, the marital home isn't the o…
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 10:31 PM
2

You married by applying for a license from the wicked, corrupt State, willingly subjecting yourself to its de facto prenuptial agreement as more particularly set forth in the unjust laws that put women in the driver's seat in a divorce. Your marriage wasn't of God even if you had a ceremony in a church because it defaulted to the terms and conditions of a marriage as defined by the State. The State is the god of your marriage.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 08:08 PM
2

What State are you in? Read the law governing divorces, with particular attention to the marital home as it relates to forcing its sale when minor children still live in the home. Then make your attorney do her job, or fire her and get another one. Not all attorneys are the right fit but it's hard to know until you see them in action, or in your case, inaction.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 08:02 PM
1

Completely normal. It is what Kevin Costner's ex did too. $50k seems excessive though, but that's coming from her attorney who has no interest in making this easy or saving any money of the marital estate. Buckle up for a litigious, drawn out divorce where the lawyers are the only winners. Lawyers are really good at manipulating wives into using the divorce process to get back at the husband, and the wives are only all too eager to go along with a scorched earth strategy, even though it burns up…
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 06:59 PM
12

Courts love maintaining the status quo, and keeping the marital home from being sold until the kids are no longer subject to child support. You are in the driver's seat. Do not let her move back in! Get a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/24 06:53 PM
1

The grief for a man usually comes much later. Don't get too excited. Divorce is the most traumatic experience most men will ever experience in their lives, and it is the gift that keeps on giving for men who have been separated from their children and financially destroyed, which isn't enough ruin because they are often hamstringed with never ending financial obligations.
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 08:12 PM
0

Fuck her. She wants out of the marriage I presume, willingly breaking her vows and the marriage contract, but wants to use the state to enforce its laws to make you continue to pay on the broken marriage contract for the rest of your life! That's unjust and unconscionable, not to mention unfair af. A good vocational expert will be able to show not only her ability to earn substantially more income, but also establish a reasonable income level based on a similarly situated lawyer with 20 years ex…
/r/Divorce_Men01/07/24 12:00 AM
4

You should hire an expert and have a vocational evaluation ordered to show the court she is voluntarily underemployed for her educational and experience level.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 09:06 PM
3

She's in a supportive relationship so it is just and reasonable that spousal support takes that into consideration. This won't apply to CS, if applicable.
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/24 09:04 PM
1

The filing date is the cutoff to separate finances so anything you do with your money afterwards will not be strictly scrutinized, so long as you are otherwise complying with court orders of temporary spousal support, if any, and will be able to pay expected child support. If you intend to support her pending the divorce, it would be best if you got credit for it and that can't happen absent an agreement with STBX without filing. You need to hire a lawyer asap. Because your wife is disabled and …
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 04:44 PM
1

Have you filed and had her served yet? That will make all the difference.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 03:53 PM
2

If you want to piss her off, refuse to answer ANY question that implies the answer could be used in a criminal prosecution (lawyers will ask about concealing assets which is really fraud, DV, child abuse, stalking, illegal recordings, etc. -- take the 5th a lot), and make sure you have a really bad memory.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 12:28 PM
1

Now it makes sense. This is a power struggle, and your wife is flexing. I bet she calls you controlling! LOL. Your wife is on dating apps and it wouldn't surprise me if this was a date-vacation because her boyfriend has a kid too. Taking a three year old on a 7 day vacation out of state is a lot of work for one person. He won't even remember it.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 01:52 AM
2

OP better get his 7 days first or it might not happen.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 01:23 AM
1

Does your son want to go?
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/24 01:22 AM
7

Never take back a cheater. It's laughable that she says you have to trust her. In fact, based on her behavior, I can't see any reasonable man trusting her ever again. Stop lying to yourself and let her go to the streets. She's going to cheat again if she hasn't already. She doesn't respect you and has no intentions of doing so either. When a man takes back a cheater, she loses all respect and thinks she can do it again. Sorry brother, it is over. Time to cut bait.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 06:50 PM
1

Staying on the mortgage is one of the dumbest things a man can do in a divorce. Hopefully you've seen the light! Not only is it an adverse line item on your credit report, which a divorce takes another bite out of too, but you won't be able to get a loan to buy a home for yourself, not to mention the fact that the mortgage company can still sue you for foreclosure since at all times you will remain in privity of contract with the lender. The fact that a final judgment or agreement states that th…
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/24 03:36 PM
5

Who cares? She filed for divorce and presumably the incident occurred while the divorce was pending. It's circumstantial evidence that divorce was the right call. That's it. Ruminating on it does nothing positive for you.
/r/Divorce_Men27/06/24 03:36 PM
3

There doesn't have to be any proof of a DV outside of what lies come out of her mouth, and an injunction against DV can be obtained ex parte, meaning it is initially granted without a hearing OR any notice to you. You'll find out when the police come to your house to remove you. You must talk about this with your lawyer. Consider wearing a go pro whenever you are around her for your own safety or surreptitiously recording all interactions you have with her. A DV injunction or charge is something…
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 07:17 PM
3

Everyone has a prenup when they get married. Either one that they've meticulously drafted with the help of a lawyer which protects them from highway robbery, or the default prenup as more particularly set forth in the State statutes that govern divorce proceedings that provides the means for your STBXW to legally rob you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 07:08 PM
1

Suicide threats are calculated manipulations. It's part of the STBXW playbook. Do NOT fall for it or let fake threats like that have any effect on your decisions. Beware of DV allegations too. She'll let you know she is thinking about it too if she starts saying she's "afraid" of you.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 06:58 PM
7

Do NOT proceed without a lawyer! Do NOT go to a mediation without a lawyer. File before going to mediation otherwise the agreement is worthless as either of you can back out at any time. Interview at least three lawyers. Ask each lawyer who they would hire if they were going through a divorce. If the lawyer says himself, lose his number (a person who represents themself has a fool for a lawyer ... beside it being an arrogant unhelpful thing to say proving the lawyer is thinking only about himsel…
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 06:48 PM
11

You were a victim of a weaponized judicial system that allowed your exwife to become unjustly enriched by stealing from you. Such feelings are natural. It would be more concerning to your mental health if you were happy that you got robbed.
/r/Divorce_Men26/06/24 05:12 PM
0

Courts don't give a shit about holding women accountable for perjury or filing false claims like DV. Judges see these women lie in every single case and expect it as well as expecting men to ignore it too. Perjury is the most committed crime, but also the least prosecuted. Men, on the other hand, get slapped with contempt orders over the smallest of matters.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 09:08 PM
2

You left out attorney fees that men with higher incomes have to pay for their STBXW's attorney in divorce cases. It's fucked up.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 09:03 PM
7

They are way more devastated by The Wall, especially if they are divorced and single at the time they are becoming invisible.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 06:29 PM
3

That's mostly correct, but the Sheriff's Office will call to track down a witness during an investigation, and the civil process department will make contact to verify an address to serve a summons. But as to warrants, you are right they don't call. They also don't post active warrants in the public record. Based on OP's story, however, I don't believe it was the Sheriff's Office either.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 02:12 PM
1

You better get a paternity test in that case. And get an STD panel run on yourself too
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 01:09 AM
3

That ONLY applies if all the marriage vows aren't broken by either party. She terminated the marriage when she stepped out multiple times, and curb stomped your heart when she most recently told you she is in love with her boyfriend that she's been banging for months and getting her guts rearranged. It makes me want to puke. You are under no obligation to follow any marriage vows when the other party intentionally breaks them, and is happy about it. Fucking hell man, for your own sake you need t…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 01:07 AM
3

Agreed. You can't fix crazy. No one can.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 01:01 AM
6

Bro, there's no way I could share my wife or reconcile with a cheater. I don't know how you do it. Perhaps you need independent therapy to work out your desire to save people when you neglect doing any work to save yourself. This is a classic refrain in substance abuse treatment, that you cannot save anyone until you save yourself. You have an addiction to a dysfunctional relationship where your wife keeps slipping and falling on other men's dicks, and you are not okay with that but you keep beg…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/24 12:58 AM
2

Your wife is on a trajectory of being a more terrible person year after year. She acts like a child, which isn't unusual with women, but your wife needs structure and your leadership. You guys aren't going to make it if she continues to self sabotage herself and refuses to follow sound advice. If you can find a better way to lead by setting firm boundaries, find it now. Because she's spiraling out of control.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 09:03 PM
1

Check out AA. It's not for everyone and I did it for 90 days just to test myself. But one thing I learned is that those people will make you feel welcome, and will run through brick walls to help you stop drinking. If you refocus your energy to sobriety and surround yourself with like minded individuals, the sky is the limit. I have nothing against alcohol, but it shouldn't be imbibed when depressed and some people shouldn't even drink. It's the first step out of the black hole you exist in and …
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 08:35 PM
3

My brother's ex racked up $30k in debt right before filing for divorce. She got new titties, new teeth, liposuction, facelift, tummy tuck, a vaginaplasty and a bleached asshole. Live streamed most of it on tiktok too. Later she would tell the court that she did it for HIM, and thus he got stuck with paying for half of it. True story.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 06:42 PM
5

"Nothing too bad, but definitely things that would paint her in a not-so-nice light if it ever came to a trial." Nobody cares. Not trying to be harsh, but unless a crime is committed against children or there is credible evidence of imminent harm to children rising to the level where DCF gets involved and takes the children, the court doesn't care to hear about dirty laundry. It will just paint YOU in the light of being petty and controlling, likely backfiring. This is especially true because yo…
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 06:35 PM
12

Your situation was similar to mine when I was married. I had my own business but it was struggling and I couldn't seem to break out of the paycheck to paycheck cycle. Meanwhile, my exwife had a stable job pulling down over $150k/year. The saying about women, "what's mine is mine and what's yours is mine" couldn't be more true. She was a selfish, miserly woman, more greedy that Scrooge himself. She didn't share a penny with me. When we went out, she'd insist we both pay our own way. The one time …
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 01:28 AM
14

That's because women don't love men for who we are but rather love the resources and comforts we can bring to their life, and how we make them feel within their social circle. No money, no honey. Glad I don't play that game anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men24/06/24 01:05 AM
7

you need to leave bro and stop worrying about how she may react. Just do you. She certainly isn't.
/r/Divorce_Men20/06/24 03:55 PM
15

This is who she is now, brother, and probably who she always was behind that facade of pretending to love you. Women do not love men for who we are, they love only what we can provide for them and how we make them feel within their social circle.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 12:54 PM
7

Stay strong, brother. Your gut is right. Do not betray yourself by allowing her tears to talk you into a fake ass reconciliation because it will be twice as worse. Ask me how I know. Many here have done the heavy lifting so you don't have to. File immediately to set a cut off date for assets and liabilities. If she lied and snuck around behind your back, she is now an adversary capable of lying about anything, including a DV charge that will let her set the narrative and have power over you. Gre…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 12:33 PM
8

Why would you take her at her word when she so easily betrayed the vows she'd taken before God and family just 6 months prior? Do not be naive, brother. You must not let her manipulate or gaslight you by wearing your heart on your sleeve. The time for trust is over, and YOU will regret exposing the empathy and love you clearly still have for her because she will curb stomp it and relish in being cold as ice to you. For some reason, making their husbands suffer emotionally is a source of great pl…
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/24 01:41 AM
11

I stopped at "she doesn't work ... I work two jobs" because that is a privilege of marriage between two committed and invested partners who love, cherish, and respect each other. Yours is not a marriage anymore.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 02:41 PM
6

Sometimes you've got to force feed the STBX. Setting the trial will conclude this chapter in your life one way or the other. At least the lawyers are happy making a small fortune on your estate.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/24 01:31 AM
2

Your son graduated from college. That's an achievement regardless of whether he got into medical school, which admissions process has become highly political as you may be aware. So there's no guarantee that if he had the grades and test scores he'd get in. But I digress. You clearly want to repair the relationship with your son so give him a graduation gift that you can participate in as well like traveling together to a place you'd both like to see, or taking a cruise together (Europe river cr…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 08:36 PM
2

If you are a man of your word, you'll stay married to her for the rest of your life because that is the word you gave when you said your vows. But you aren't planning on doing that. So put that fake loyalty out of your mind and file immediately to protect yourself. Or be a man of your word, simp harder, and live a miserable life alone in a marriage with a woman who used you, doesn't love you, doesn't respect you, and finds you repulsive. Good luck, you are going to need it bc reason and logic el…
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 01:53 PM
7

You need to file ASAP, however. That will set a cut off date for assets and liabilities. You don't want her running up credit card debt, buying a car, or getting new titties and sticking you with half the bill. Expect her to try to squeeze you for as much resources as she can before she leaves.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 01:34 PM
5

"order says we'd make exchanges "as it occurs" basically at our discretion" Whoever wrote that steaming pile of garbage is why you are spending money now to go back to court for an order of more specificity. You were set up to fail. I hope it wasn't your lawyer who did that to you bc you were done a dirty.
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/24 12:51 AM
17

Being emotionally unavailable is the source of a man's strength. Letting Delilah cut off your hair will always result in tragedy.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 04:57 PM
5

Update us brother
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 01:06 AM
3

You aren't the only one who's had those thoughts brother.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/24 12:19 AM
28

Marriage to a woman means having a guy all to herself that she can treat worse than everyone else she knows in life.
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 12:45 PM
17

She's gaslighting you. When a woman shows you who they really are, believe her. Your real "wife" wants an open relationship and you to accept being cucked. Take her back at your own risk and peril, but know if you do that you are only delaying the inevitable. She doesn't love you the way you have loved her, she doesn't respect you, and she holds you in contempt. If sparks were flying with her ex and he was well off enough to financially support her, she'd be gone. That's not loyalty, that's monk…
/r/Divorce_Men15/06/24 11:39 AM
15

Prepare a child support worksheet with her new income and bring it to court. Also, get a lawyer bc you don't want to F this up on some technicality, and there is plenty of money you can be saving if this shakes out the right way. The audacity of these women to lie, deceive, and hide evidence in these cases never ceases to amaze me. They have no honor or virtue. No wonder it was so easy for Satan to deceive Eve.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 08:42 PM
2

You are right, but it is still unfair af because in order to get any equity out of the house and distribute it to both parties, the house would have to be sold. If the house is sold, commissions are paid to the realtors which would likely eat up any equity in the home so that each would get nothing. The STBX gets a major windfall in such a circumstance of buying her out without factoring in the closing costs.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 12:45 PM
7

You can begin a massive remodeling job that depreciates the value of the house. Tear out the kitchen and don't finish it until after the divorce. Rip up the yard for a future landscaping project. Whatever. The goal is to reduce any equity to split up. Otherwise, you've got a straightforward divorce with little to quibble over and should be fine. File NOW to set a cut off date for assets and liabilities. If she runs up $10k in credit card debt before you file, that's half yours.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 12:41 PM
3

It doesn't, unfortunately. Best case scenario is that you have an private indemnification agreement where your ex is solely responsible for the mortgage so that you can cross claim her for damages after you are sued by the mortgage company for default. You are still on the mortgage and thus liable under contract with the bank; the agreement with your ex does not terminate your contractual obligations to the bank. Also, because you are still on the mortgage, it adversely affects your credit and a…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 12:31 PM
8

First, make sure the check comes from her and the exact amount is stated in the final judgment. A check from her parents who are not parties to the divorce will likely be deemed income by the IRS and thus subject to taxes. Second, if there is a mortgage, you must get your name off it because that affects your credit score and ability to get a mortgage yourself.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 12:26 PM
10

I know men who say fuck it and move out of the country because they refuse to pay vaginamoney and child support for kids they aren't given a chance to have a relationship with anymore. But to stick around just to punish yourself and voluntarily pay vaginamoney and CS for kids you'll never see? I don't see the logic in that whatsoever. Your wife has checked out, she's evil, a liar, and should be in jail for making up false criminal charges. She doesn't care what you think unless it is detrimental…
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/24 11:48 AM
14

Don't let the door hit her in the ass as she leaves, but leave she must. It's over brother. Put that dysfunctional relationship behind you and start living your best life, which is impossible right now with a woman dragging you down.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 11:10 PM
2

Sounds pretty straightforward and you can't be any more fair than even stevens. Cash in business is different from a business valuation, which I assume you've already paid for. Seems like your wife is holding up the settlement, probably due to her attorney dragging it out and making things acrimonious so he can earn more money off of fomenting hatred and distrust between the parties. Happens all the time that lawyers get in the way of amicably settling.
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 02:27 PM
2

Lawyers are like pants, they don't always fit right. Get a second opinion, then a third. You are the boss so it is likely you haven't directed your attorney to slow his roll in racking up thousands of dollars in fees for what you believe is unnecessary. Business valuations are only necessary if you need to convince a judge at a trial unless your STBX has agreed to accept your numbers. She probably is undervaluing assets as women are prone to do. It's hard to give any guidance without knowing how…
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 12:20 PM
1

Then trust your gut. If you don't, then regret will be with you for the rest of your life. Your intuition is screaming at you! Stop ignoring it!!
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 12:01 PM
14

What's hers is hers and what is yours is hers. That's just how women think. Do NOT settle for less than 50% of the assets, CS, and alimony. She's also on the hook to pay your attorney fees. You better have a lawyer! Nothing will make a woman more angry than parting with her money, do not be deceived. She's amicable now because she hasn't parted with a dime but that will change in a nanosecond the moment she's forced to fork over her fair share in a divorce. She doesn't love or respect you, and i…
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 11:56 AM
9

She's clearly a mess and her behavior is objectively intolerable, but are you sure she can't quit drinking? Seems like a lot of her issues are related to her alcohol problem including the depression that could also be helped with exercise, healthy eating, and sunshine. That said, if she's cheating or has lost all respect respect for you then the light may be out for good. The bullying has to stop. She needs counseling. She needs better friends and influences. She needs to quit drinking. Both of …
/r/Divorce_Men13/06/24 11:33 AM
11

About five years after the divorce, my business blew up and I retired at 45 financially independent. Not sure how long that will last in this economy, but I look back on my divorce and laugh because my business wasn't earning enough to support us both and that's why she divorced me even though she was making 6 figures. She had divorce papers drawn up the week after I told her I was broke bc my business had a bad couple months. The old saying is true, "What's mine is hers, and what's hers is hers…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 10:27 PM
1

In a high conflict divorce with kids, you want as specific a settlement agreement as possible. If you think you've got 90% of the details worked out, why do you even need a mediator when your attorneys could be working right now on hammering out the terms of a partial settlement agreement? Partial because her attorney is not going to let her agree to your terms regarding Alimony and 401k. So leave the retirement account and Alimony as unsettled matters for the judge at trial. You don't have any …
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 08:02 PM
11

She isn't your friend, but you are the only one to recognize that. She needs you to pretend it's all good to assuage her feelings of guilt and betrayal. When my ex said to me before filing, "I will always love you" I immediately replied, "Love? We aren't even friends. Don't say that to me ever again. It's manipulative and I don't believe it." And that was that. It was all business afterwards and I never spoke to her again. She knew what she was doing and calling her out on it stopped it cold.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 05:10 PM
2

No More Mr. Nice Guy and Boundaries are good books to read bc it sounds like you need to set some. Old habits are hard to break even in a divorce. If you allowed your ex to consistently violate your boundaries, end that now bc you will be far more bitter at yourself for allowing your mental health to take a back seat to her happiness.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 04:03 PM
10

A couple days before the marriage. I remember telling my brother that I didn't want to get married to a cheater and he basically told me to do it anyway. Some bro, huh? It didn't take long for her to figure it out and she asked for a divorce within the first 3 months of marriage. Divorce was finalized 10 months from the date of marriage. I was completely indifferent to her, but angry with myself for a long time. All good now brothers! Happily single, and I will NEVER get married again. There's z…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 03:52 PM
5

Perjury is the most committed criminal offense in every state, but it is also the least prosecuted crime in America. Women commit perjury in every divorce case, and no Judge has ever held a woman accountable for it.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 02:21 PM
5

If she really wanted you back, she wouldn't have slept with 4 dudes in a month and certainly wouldn't have told you about it. She is for the streets, brother. Do NOT take her back. You will be miserable. You won't be able to trust her and she will not respect you or your boundaries.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 11:59 AM
2

It's a shame that divorce cannot be resolved amicably by reasonable adults, but such is the case 95% of the time. Get a lawyer on your side asap. Tell your wife you are hiring an lawyer to handle matters with the hope she will be amicable and reasonable to settle this fairly for the benefit of the children. Read the law of your state to familiarize yourself with the issues. One great resource is reading the self-help divorce material provided by your court system. Plead with her to not make it c…
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 01:36 AM
6

This is the way. Don't ignore your brother's experience and advice, OP. We've done the heavy lifting so you don't have to.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 12:36 AM
4

The suicide claims are a complete fabrication, it's just another vector of manipulation women use to guilt trip you into a favorable outcome for HER. Don't believe it for second. On the other hand, men committing suicide during and after divorce is a fucking epidemic that is completely ignored by society.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 12:19 AM
2

Hope you have a lawyer because you have all the financial leverage in the divorce. You may be entitled to alimony, but CS to you is a lock.
/r/Divorce_Men12/06/24 12:05 AM
1

She realized she couldn't live off just a portion of your income in a divorce (alimony and child support), figuring she'd 100% have to get a full time job just to survive even with court ordered contributions. Knowing that divorce is financially devastating, and the struggles you are already having making ends meet, she thinks it is better to work a little to keep you happy paying all the bills. It is a selfish, self serving decision, do not be deceived. She is doing it to pacify you, not becaus…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 10:05 PM
2

"I didn’t formally get to meet her wife" This doesn't make any sense.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 09:30 PM
7

She cheated, brother. Release her to the streets. Do NOT take back a cheater. Ask me how I know.
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 12:54 AM
1

Retirement accounts are assets acquired during the course of the marriage, and subject to equitable division. Short term marriages of about 5 years do not carry a presumption of alimony, but a judge has discretion to order some temporary alimony if she cries a lot and says she is in the poorhouse. Mediation is required, your STBX will have to go; she may be eligible to pay on a sliding scale based on her income, or lack thereof. As to your extra money being saved, keep it in cash and start colle…
/r/Divorce_Men11/06/24 12:22 AM
1

That should be contingent upon a minimum success of the business. I hope a lawyer drafted the settlement agreement and advised you on all the issues. It is probably a good idea to get a second opinion.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 08:49 PM
1

The crazy thing is that in her mind she deserves it because she thinks she contributed just as much as you did to the business. You can't reason with crazy, that's why you pay them to go away. That said, it seems like this could be used as leverage in negotiations to get a better outcome for you in other matters.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/24 08:31 PM
3

Wear a GoPro whenever you are around her whether it is on or not. It will force both of you to be on your best behavior. There's nothing you can do about her lying if she intends to tee you up with a DV, which is the worst thing that can happen in a divorce proceeding. It's an extra case, maybe two (injunction and criminal charges), that you do NOT need to deal with. But you should take reasonable precautions to protect yourself. Having a witness present can also be helpful. Know this: the one t…
/r/Divorce_Men06/06/24 01:29 PM
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