TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

VioletRomantic Archive

View 2 posts and 365 comments by VioletRomantic on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
25

10 people is a LOT of people to share a living space with. It doesn't excuse her from not pitching in, but she might be feeling extremely anxious about being so close to others. I am a very socially anxious person, and I have gone completely nonverbal or become easily agitated in large group situations where I didnt have the support of people I knew very well. And a lot of the time its been mistaken as me being aloof, rude, or antisocial when in reality my brain and body are just not here for it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/21 02:04 PM
17

If it didn't mean anything to her she wouldn't have made a whole spectacle of it... That's really sad, like I hope now that they're married and everything she's happy, but idk. If you have to manipulate someone into being with you they didn't really want to be there and maybe you shouldn't force it. And acting like it was empowering and trying to get others to back you up and applaud you for it can cover up how much it stings that this person you love doesn't love you back and want to be with yo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/21 03:22 PM
40

And you are directly supporting someone's passion and life. If I ever get married I am insisting on a custom crafted set from an independent artist. Preferably a woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/21 03:12 PM
64

So wait, she wants him to propose with a ring that was ALREADY HERS? She just gave him this family heirloom and was like "Yo, ask me when you're ready." Like how much more can you hold his hand before you're just the one doing the proposing?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/02/21 03:05 PM
1

My best friend just purchased her fourth home. Her first she purchased as a single woman in her early 20s. Then she sold it when she got married so that she and her husband could buy something bigger. Then she made the decision to sell the second house and buy the third, a brand new property in a nicer neighborhood. And when she divorced her now ex husband, the property value had gone up enough on the new house that she had more than enough walking away in the divorce to buy the fourth. She was …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 10:13 PM
15

I dated a man for a while who was CONSTANTLY pressuring me for anal, despite the fact that I made it clear I did not enjoy or want to do it. When I straight up asked him why he wanted it so fucking bad he told me that at that point he wanted it just because I was so against doing it, and that it made me uncomfortable. And that if I loved him I would do things that made me uncomfortable to satisfy him. I never touched him again after that. I couldn't break up with him at the time, but I was so th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/02/21 09:09 PM
27

Imagine being so repulsive that your partner is relieved when you start looking for sex anywhere else.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/01/21 03:55 PM
177

Put it in their beds. If they dont start tidying up, put every single messy thing they leave in their bed. Crumbs from the counter? Bed. Wet towel on the floor? Bed. Muddy boots in the living room? Bed. Maybe I'm just a petty bitch, but maybe they'll learn to stop leaving their shit places if they dont want to lay in it later.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 07:58 PM
53

The best man I ever dated got super into my beauty routine because he knew it was something that made me feel happy and good about myself. I would ask him for suggestions on colors and he always got excited and gave really thoughtful, exciting ideas. He would take me to Ulta and let me look around and talk on and on about makeup and skincare. He would also get excited when I asked him for nail color suggestions. It was super sweet. I will never settle for a man who doesn't hype me up like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 06:49 PM
21

I tell them its because I havent met anyone worth spending my time and affection on. I have high standards, and other things I could be doing with myself. I genuinely enjoy being single, any man who wants to be a part of my life is going to have to prove to me that I will enjoy his presence in my life more than I enjoy my solitude.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/01/21 06:38 PM
6

Making abortion illegal doesn't reduce the number of abortions women seek. It just drastically increases the number of women who die from unsafe home abortions, suicide, or intimate partner violence. But no "pro life" advocate wants to talk about that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 09:01 AM
12

Id probably feel safer swimming with a shark than a man in most cases. The shark won't attack me because I'm wearing too revealing of a swimsuit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/10/20 07:15 AM
9

Honestly I don't think I would ever feel comfortable with a male doctor. I don't trust the compassion or true competency of men, and far too many of them go into positions of power like this with the intent to abuse people in vulnerable positions. I have dealt with exactly one male doctor, who decided it would be hilarious to walk into the room and greet my by laughing and shouting the analysis for my test results at me like it was some giant joke. I was like 15 with my first UTI, and I immediat…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 04:17 PM
2

Okay. I hope they take their sex dolls and go off and be happy and leave us be. Please, random unwashed man who I wouldn't want to be involved with anyway, go stick your junk in 90lbs of silicone and forget that real women exist. We are honestly so tired of being harassed. If I am so obsolete, please, by all means go enjoy your "advanced" sex life without me. Go, be free! Live your pornsick life! Far, far, far away from the rest of us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/10/20 04:08 PM
11

That is one thing I appreciated about my most recent ex dude. He was ALWAYS interested in the media I was consuming. He wanted to listen to my music, or know what shows and movies I wanted to see. He would suggest things to me too, but always things he thought were in my tastes and that he genuinely thought I would enjoy. He also never shamed or made fun of my chosen media. If there was ever something I played around him that he didn't care for, he didn't make me feel bad about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 11:05 PM
9

Do not ever feel bad about turning a man down. For any reason. For no reason. You get to decide who you spend time with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 12:12 PM
16

To most human men its not. It's just an annoying consequence of sex to them. Most men don't really want children, which is why they don't appreciate or acknowledge what women go through to bring them into the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/10/20 11:51 AM
81

I'm only 5'3". But I avoid shorter men like the plague because I do not have the energy to deal with their insecurity about it. Ive tried. Ive tried so hard to be kind and understanding with short men. But they have to bring it up CONSTANTLY, and in ways that require me to put in all this effort reassuring them that their height isn't an issue. It wasn't until your insecurity about it made up 78% of your personality. They also tend to be really aggressive to make up for it. Like they feel like t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/10/20 02:10 PM
32

I dated a guy who had NO cooking utensils or anything when we started dating. I literally spent two months flipping pancakes and making meals with just spoons, forks, and butter knives before I convinced him that at 27 he NEEDED to have these things even if he himself couldn't even boil pasta.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 03:54 PM
48

Because having others reinforce that I as a human being have value is totally a trick. Because having my experiences validated is just about scoring some dude. Because being told for the first time in my life that I am allowed to have boundries and standards, and that I deserve someone who loves me and treats me as well as I treat them is some huuuuge con to get some dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 02:17 PM
5

My best friend got a puppy, and were talking about getting two more dogs after we move. Between my best friend, her pupper, and our cats I feel super fulfilled. I'm surrounded by unconditional love all day, and a dude is going to have to work pretty hard to show me he's going to treat me as well and make me feel as good as they do.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/10/20 03:34 AM
2

GOOD. Dont put up with stinky men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 10:34 PM
4

They'll make an effort in the beginning, typically. Like at least to shower occasionally or brush their teeth before hanging out. But a lot of them will throw hygiene out the window when they feel like they have you locked down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 10:34 PM
9

When I was dating I used to men constantly about how much I can consume when it comes to alcohol and my state of sobriety. I say I'm such a lightweight and can only maybe handle one beer so that I know after less than one drink if they're going to be pushy and trying to get me drunk to take advantage of me, and I can make an escape while I'm still sober.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/10/20 02:18 PM
9

Almost every man I have ever met has had awful skin. But the goalposts for what's considered good skin for Men vs good skin for women are so far apart they're not even on the same playing field. Men dont have an entire industry built around pointing out their imperfections and selling them cures for those imperfections.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 07:06 PM
25

I bet his laundry is sniff tested for wearability. But years of constantly stewing in his own filth mean that he wears his clothes 3-5x past when they should have been washed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 03:56 PM
226

I've dated more than one man that I literally had to bribe, nag, and full on fight to get them to have ANY kind of regular hygiene. Its disgusting and makes you feel dirty as well. I am never fighting with a dude to wash himself again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/10/20 03:44 PM
6

I was about to say! I'm not less sexy in a turtleneck, I'm just now sexy while wearing it. I have this orange one that I am dying for the weather to cool down enough that I can wear it. Edit: I decided to wear the orange turtleneck anyway, and I look and feel cute as hell. I'm also definitely going to buy more turtlenecks for this winter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/10/20 06:54 PM
12

If we are going to learn anywhere, FDS is the place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/10/20 02:22 PM
166

I have no problem with the truth. What I have a problem with is finding out the truth after being lied to.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 02:56 PM
36

Society has conditioned men that its totally fine for them to just walk away from their children if they dont feel like being a parent. No harm, no foul. You just helped make these children, but you dont have to stick around, raise, or provide for them. Its totally fine if you want to skip out on the family you helped create to chase some new chick who doesn't have reasonable expectations of you!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/10/20 02:41 PM
50

I am now, thankfully. It's taken a lot longer than it should have, and I feel like shit about it, but reminding myself of all the fucked up shit my entire family has put me though helps keep me away. In a few months I'm getting to skip out of my home state and will probably change my name as well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 04:01 AM
93

I spent pretty much my whole conscious life growing up waiting for my dad to snap and murder me. He made no effort to hide how much he regretted having a family. He told me to my face my entire life that having children is the worst choice a person could ever make, and that it totally ruins their life. He made no effort to hide how much he hated my mom. Ive really never heard him say a nice thing about her. He loves violence. He used to make my brother and I fist fight each other until I was blo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 03:54 AM
22

Its sad. I remember being like 16-22, in relationships that were making me literally suicidal, and yet convinced that if I left that was it. I would be single and alone forever, and that being alone was the worst thing I could possibly do because it meant I had failed as a woman and as a human being. My worth was entirely based in how much shit I could put up with from men who were happy to abuse me and make me feel like garbage. I mourn for my early 20s and how much time I really wasted thinkin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 03:49 AM
31

Who the hell does he think he is? With 7 kids he doesn't have time to date. Men do not deserve to be fathers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 03:39 AM
12

We have a radiant barrier in the house I currently live in and I am lucky if I get a single bar of reception that may or may not actually carry in any texts/calls. The only carrier that apparently works in any of the houses in my neighborhood is Verizon, which I am not willing to pay out the ass for. I just switched everything over to a Google voice number to deal with it until I get to move.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/10/20 03:37 AM
16

They're also not actually competitive about anything. They're just assholes who can't stand to lose or be challenged. But they aren't driven to do anything or better themselves in any way. I compete with my hobby. I have half a dozen trophies and medals on display because I am damn proud and fiercely competitive about it. I pour hours of my time into perfecting my work and honing my skills. Competitive for me isn't some bravado "I could totally do that." Fucking do it, then. You're competitive? …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 06:07 PM
12

At least two. Who knows if there are more kids out there that he's lied about.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 05:38 PM
3

When I was a counselor for the girl scouts I taught my campers how to make marshmallow fondant for a "cake wars" activity. It was so much fun to make, but i swear they ate like half of it when my back was turned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/10/20 03:24 AM
2

At this point I've embraced it. Oh, you want to talk about how you feel like a piece of shit now thay I've called you out for being a piece of shit? Yeah, you are. Wallow in it. Because you sure as shit won't learn and grow from it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 04:51 PM
24

Weed, beer, video games, gas to drive around for 90 minutes looking for a place to fuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 04:40 PM
85

HV also isn't a set in stone list of criteria. There are a lot of principals every HV man should have, but guess what, those are pretty much all just a baseline for "is not an asshole." Talks to me like a person? Doesn't cheat on me all over town? Doesn't use me for sex and/or money? Can wash his ass crack with regularity? Has a shred of emotional intelligence? Their perceived "shortage" of HVM in the world is only a "problem" because they are happy being abusive, manipulative, disgusting, porn …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 04:23 PM
5

This sub affirms my childfree-ness more than any other. Including the actual childfree centered one.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 06:11 AM
11

My best friend growing up and her younger sister were both donor babies that her mom had and raised completely by herself. Their mom was incredibly independent. She owned their home, had a successful career as a psychiatrist, and was a loving mother who was always there for her daughters. She never got married her whole life. Apparently she had watched her father be abusive to her mother growing up, and lived in a time and place where divorce wasn't an option so they didn't have a way out. She c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 04:18 PM
14

I've made peace with it. At this point a man is going to have to be the one who changes my mind about dating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 03:27 AM
184

My heart breaks so much for women who have children with men who treat them like this. Being childfree comes with its own issues, but I am so glad that I will never be genetically handcuffing myself to a man who hates me for birthing his children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/09/20 02:30 AM
27

Maybe she's bragging about having 10, incredibly well lubricated vaginas?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 02:34 PM
57

But its obviously Cardis fault he cheated. Maybe if she stayed home fulfilling those traditional values he would only be dehumanizing her for the rest of her life. As women its our job to bend over backwards to be their maids, sex toys, therapists, chefs, mommies, and personal assistants! /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 02:33 PM
5

Been there. I got coerced into an engagement and felt like I had to make a social media post about it because he did. The ring he gave me was this ugly as sin piece of costume jewelry a friend if his gave him for the occasion. A HUGE, pear shaped garnet that had a giant scratch in it, cloudy crystals on each side, and an already tarnished band that was at least two sizes too big for me in a style that I hated. I was so embarrassed to wear it in front of people. When I left him he asked for it ba…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 07:20 AM
5

How men treat women they have no chance or desire to fuck is, in my opinion, the best way to judge their actual opinion of women. A good man, a HVM, will treat all women with respect. Hes not treating the women around him kindly because he thinks he has a chance to get his dick wet or is sexually attracted to them. Its kind of an extension of watching how your date treats the waitstaff or cashiers. Shitty men are more than happy to tell on themselves, we just have to listen and believe them when…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 06:52 AM
16

That makes me think of my senior year English teacher from high-school. She and her husband both taught English at the same school. The coached boys and girls versions of the same sports. They ate lunch together every day. He would pop into her classroom during passing periods to say hi to her. It really, really seemed like they were still so in love with each other and valued each other, and had been married for over a decade with several kids. Looking back, theirs was probably one of the first…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/09/20 06:46 AM
10

I think that thats EXACTLY whats happening, though. The sub has grown over 20k members since I first started reading it. Twenty thousand women in just a few months. The scrotes can keep bashing us, but I think its honestly working against them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 10:15 PM
80

I was honestly kind of ashamed of how drawn I was to FDS when I first found the sub. It got mentioned elsewhere as being this awful, hateful, sexist, incel-esque sub. And I checked it out because I am secretly a glutton for reading others drama and nonsense. But as hard as I searched in the sub, I couldn't really find anything that fit that hateful narrative. I found women who were reasonably fed up with how they have been treated. I found women who were demanding more and putting themselves fir…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 06:15 PM
101

Low effort is honestly a best case scenario for having kids with a LVM/NVM. My mom had four with my dad, who was happy to physically and verbally abuse all of us from the get go, and told me constantly to my face that having kids was the worst thing a person could do and it ruins your life. Having children with the wrong partner can lead to a lifetime of crippling abuse for your children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 05:43 AM
81

As a fat chick, I can sincerely say I don't want them just as much as they don't want me. I absolutely love my body, and am working on having a healthier relationship with it. Why would I pine for the attention of a man who will just tear me down?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/09/20 05:36 AM
6

At least three. And I have a pretty resilient stomach. I really, really, really dont trust men around food anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 06:44 PM
93

You'll also need to turn the grill on, remind him about how long the meat takes to cook, and make sure he doesn't carve it immediately because he doesn't actually know meat needs to rest despite the fact that you've told him a million times. My best friends ex husband talked up and down about this expensive grill/smoker he just HAD to have. But in the year he's had it, he's used it maybe four or five times and acts like its a huge chore every single time she asks him to grill something. We bough…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 12:45 AM
2

Its not like even in a cute script or something. It looks like she just let some scrote freehand it for her with his shitty, third grade level handwriting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/09/20 12:01 AM
3

My dating history is plagued with broke men. One who didn't have a job the whole three years we dated. Another who forced me to pay all his bills and moved himself in with me out of nowhere without asking to keep himself from having to pay rent elsewhere. Ive been on so many walk dates, coffee dates, dates where I've paid for myself. Ive asked for next to nothing from any man before because I didnt want to be seen as materialistic or a gold digger. And honestly, fuck that. Its gotten me nothing …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 11:59 PM
66

I'm childfree, and had a salpingectomy at 22. But at this point in my life I would not give the time of day to a man who has not or is not currently working on getting a vasectomy. Ive heard too many cases of men who claim to be childfree, and then aftwr a while run off to spread their seed because "mUh lEgAcY." I'm not interested in anyone who isn't as sure and serious about their reproductive future as I am.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 11:02 PM
12

Abso-fucking-lutlely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/09/20 10:55 PM
3

I thought for years that if I just kept lowering my standards and asking less and less of men who were interested in me I would find love. I genuinely thought asking for anything was too much. After all, a man being interested in me should be enough to make me bend over backwards for his love and approval. So I got comfortable with putting in 200% of the effort in relationships and expecting nothing back other than having a man attached to me. You can go ahead and guess how well that turned out …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/09/20 03:44 PM
73

I had a dude with a dick the size of a crayon constantly ask me DURING sex to tell him how big his dick was. When I indulged him in his lie, because what else am I going to say in that incredibly awkward moment, he super leaned into it and started going off about how he was probably the biggest I'd ever had, and how my ex probably had a tiny needle dick. It was so incredibly embarrassing and uncomfortable, and the sex itself wasn't even remotely good. I don't think I would have remembered or car…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/09/20 03:52 PM
9

This is exactly why, at 28 years old, I had to cut off literally my entire family. I grew up in a violent household. I watched my parents attack each other. They would beat and scream at us. My dad encouraged violence amongst his children. He used to force my brother and I to fight for his entertainment, but my brother was always bigger and stronger than me so it was just me as a little kid getting beaten to a pulp by another little kid. My younger sister learned early that she could physically …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/09/20 12:04 AM
64

Or even for himself! I have so many married friends who make literally all of their husband's appointments. Some of them have been doing it since they were dating. And if they dont make the appointment and remind the men that they have it, they just won't ever go. I have a friend who has been paying extra for expensive dental coverage on their insurance for like two years (out of HER PAYCHECK), so that her husband could go get braces and his teeth fixed, and hes never even made an appointment. I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 05:15 PM
265

50/50 on finances, but he will never lift a finger to help around the house unless he's begged, and even then he'll only do a half assed job. He won't contribute to raising any kids, and will view parenting as babysitting. He won't keep track of any social engagements, buy gifts for birthdays and holidays, or do anything akin to emotional labor. 50/50 on all the bills, even if he's making significantly more than you are, and is okay to watch you struggle and waste your money for him so that he c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/09/20 05:09 PM
9

I personally think I look terrible in leggings. Leggings are not forgiving towards my cellulite and giant thighs. I dont wear them to be sexy, I wear them because I have 467 things to accomplish today and I want to be comfy, or I'm working out and want to be comfy, or I'm sleeping and want to be comfy. If I want to feel sexy I will put on something sexy. Leggings are not it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/09/20 05:24 AM
35

9???? That poor woman, what a waste. I'm personally childfree, but I talk about the problems with men's sperm allllllllllll the time to my friends who want children. What a fucking scrote. Its sad she wasted so many years of her life on him, but honestly thank goodness he couldn't reproduce and she wasn't stuck with whatever pond scum he was pumping out and tied to him forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 08:45 PM
108

It happens to so many women, though! Ive met more than one woman who "struggled" to get pregnant and were feeling terrible about their ability to have children, and it turned out that after tons of testing and trying and blaming themselves, their partners had shit quality sperm. But thats always the last thing that men want to test for, because they're led to believe that their sperm is infallible and its quality persists until they die. Really, just because they can make it doesnt mean it's usa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 07:00 PM
4

I dont know if fictional Jesse's dont count, sadly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 06:33 PM
191

And then he would still blame her for not getting pregnant from his prehistoric sperm. Like maybe if your swimmers didn't croak halfway out your balls...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 06:02 PM
17

My first boyfriend did this. He fucked with my birth control a few times, and then when I had to go off of it because I didn't have insurance he refused to wear condoms. Im so lucky I didn't get pregnant, but it was a huge part of the reason I pushed to have my salpingectomy so young (22).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/09/20 01:43 AM
18

Thank you! ❤ You all give me so much reassurance that I'm doing the right thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 02:27 AM
40

Its taken me years. And honestly it took finding FDS for me to really have this kind of resolve. In the past I would have cried, apologized to HIM for overreacting, and let him continue to disrespect my feelings and communication like that. And its been HARD. I've considered multiple times texting him to tell him off or let him know why I stopped speaking to him. But I know he doesn't care. If he cared he would have messaged me by now to find out whats wrong. So if he doesnt care why should I? I…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 02:19 AM
85

Its because they don't feel sorry about what they did. They just feel like we are wrong for being hurt/upset/whatever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/09/20 01:17 AM
172

I recently ghosted a guy because after I communicated that something he said to me was hurtful he didn't think to apologize. He was quick to clarify that I had misinterpreted what he said, but glossed over the fact that I was still hurt by it. Told him to have a nice day, and then just didn't text him again. I can absolutely understand a miscommunication, and it wouldn't have been a big deal if he had apologized. But I directly said he had hurt me, and he just told me why I shouldn't be hurt. Th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/09/20 11:36 PM
8

Yes! I was explaining this concept yesterday to my best friend who has been carrying 100% of the mental load in her relationship, and is finally divorcing her LVM husband. Literally this dude is 40 and for the last decade she's done everything for him. She's had to make all of his appointments, remind him of holidays, maintain all of ther family relationships, tell him when to do his like two chores around the house... everything. And he's starting to get really whiney because she's stopped doin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 03:06 PM
12

I also read it as making fun of men who think 50/50 is equally contributing to the bills and rhen checking out while their partners take on all of the cooking, cleaning, household management, social management, childcare, and pet care all while looking like an immaculate Instagram model.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 02:51 PM
14

I didnt know for years that abusive behavior was abnormal. My parents hate each other, and I grew up listening to them fight constantly and violently. My dad finds it perfectly acceptable to blame every problem in his life on my mom, and openly belittle her and talk bad about her to anyone around. He does this with all of us, because he really hates his entire family, but it was what was normal growing up. So when my own partners started to belittle me, insult me, or abuse me I thought it was no…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/09/20 02:44 PM
10

Failed the trust test. A REAL woman would refuse to look, knowing that the mere gesture meant he had nothing to hide. /s
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:52 PM
19

Me!!!! My first boyfriend was cheating on me from day 1, and went to work immediately convincing me that all of his red flags were just me bein insecure, and that I was too stupid and immature to know how relationships worked. I literally wasn't allowed near his phone or computer screens, like I wasn't even allowed to pass him his phone or look in the same direction as his computer unless he had asked me to watch him play a game. And I was so convinced that that was normal for years after becaus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/09/20 02:48 PM
19

I grew up poor. My parents preferred to spend their money on beer, weed, and cigarettes over basic necessities for their families. I grew up being conditioned that not only was it bad to have basic needs, but it was the worst thing I could ever possibly do to want someone else to provide or do things for me. And that followed me into most of my adult relationships. I attracted men who were not only broker than shit, but were unwilling to put in a single iota of effort to make up for that. And I …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/08/20 12:09 AM
7

No, I had sex with you because you literally wouldn't leave or stop touching me and it had been several hours of me begging you to stop and go, and so I just did it because it felt like that was the only option left. I did it because you made it very clear that if I didn't say yes you were going to take it anyway or regret making me say no. I did it because I was too intoxicated to know what was going on, and you took my lack of ability to say no as a yes. I wish I had even remotely liked most o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:15 PM
10

I was friends in high-school with a guy who's last name was Williams. We were talking about kids, and he mentioned he really didn't want to be a parent but would probably have kids anyway because he had all sisters and felt that he had to preserve the family name. Dude, its like the 3rd most common last name in the country. Tens of thousands of people are already doing that for you. I was utterly disgusted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 05:06 PM
4

Same here! I come from a family with several severe alcoholics, including my brother, and frequent or excessive drinking makes me really uncomfortable. I will have a glass of wine or beer maybe once a month if there's something going on, but I dont really casually drink, and I would like a partner who is kind of the same.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:30 PM
38

It always creeps me the fuck out, too. Like why do you want this photo? Is it to jerk off to? Are you trying to analyze where I am or who I'm with? Are you trying to like catch me being unflattering so you can insult me? Are you going to try to love bomb me by then gushing over the picture? Nah, dude. You know what I look like. If I wanted to send you a picture I would do it of my own volition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 03:20 PM
6

If he can't afford to buy a vowel how is he going to go on a date?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 02:50 AM
2

My best friend is starting the process of divorcing her husband! Im honestly so thrilled for her, the more I've gotten to know him over the years (they got married just before we became friends), the less and less I've liked him. He definitely has a lot of of LV qualities and has wrecked her self esteem. Next summer were hoping that everything will be finalized and we're taking out pets and fucking off to a whole different state together!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/08/20 02:19 AM
24

I started paying for all of my own things (school supplies and fees, toiletries, clothing, etc) aside from very basic food and housing when I was 15. Not because my parents stopped paying for it at that age, but because I was finally old enough to find ways to make my own money and buy the things I needed. Before then it would often be common to not have things like toilet paper, soap/shampoo, toothpaste, and fitting clothes for weeks to months at a time. But my parents always had money for beer…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/08/20 05:15 AM
42

To me a ring symbolizes his willingness to invest in our future together. If he buys a cheap ring just to propose to you, is he really thinking about the investment that getting married needs to be? I'm not saying that an engagement ring is only valuable if it's absurdly expensive, but it needs to be something that is quality (to last), in your tastes, in your size, and in line with your values (conflict free diamonds, opinions on heirloom or secondhand rings, etc).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 02:23 AM
2

Thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 02:06 AM
9

We are literally so excited. Were hoping to move halfway across the country just the two of us and our pets to a state where we know exactly no one by this time next year. No abusive families to hold us down, no LV friends taking advantage of us, a totally clean state to be who we truly want to be. We're not scared because we have each other for support. She will have enough money for a solid down payment on a house for us in the city we're moving to, which means we will have our own space from …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/08/20 01:18 AM
7

All she did was point out what a huge safety risk it is, which is something that the mods have constantly had to remind us of. Like, it's great that we've found a community full of women we'd love to be surrounded by IRL, but we are an extremely targeted sub. There are tons of people out there who think that we deserve to be violently harmed for just having standards, and its literally happened before where a man has tried to organize a meet up to trick FDS women into showing up in person. Maybe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:15 PM
27

Seeing how men react to the phease "making love" is really telling about how sexually violent they are, and how much they respect the emotional side of sexuality. Seriously, ask them straight up how they feel about it, and watch them directly tell you that they think its gross, then describe how they expect all of their sex to be rough, violent, and serving only their needs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 10:10 PM
24

Me too. Multiple times. Ive wasted an entire decade of my life on men who were worth less than dog shit. Its fucking embarrassing. My roommate and I are moving out of state and I am so excited to leave behind almost every single person who has ever met one of my exes so that I can stop having them rubbed in my face constantly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 09:40 PM
31

Based on what you've already said about him, he likely wouldn't/already doesn't take actual care of her. Let's be real, her grandmother would probably be taking care of her if she lived with them full time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/08/20 08:31 PM
4

You should try therapy! Learning to love yourself and put yourself first is a really important step you should consider taking if you're hurting. Dating during a global pandemic comes with a lot of serious risks, and you might want to think about if you're really putting your best interests and safety first. Being lonely sucks, but you can definitely find happiness on your own.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/08/20 05:58 AM
9

Pre-Covid I went on a date with a dude who only had his gaming chair. He bragged about how he was making all this money, but literally the only place to sit in his apartment was this one gaming chair. We were at his apartment and he sat down and just let me hover there awkwardly in front of him while we talked. It was so surreal. This was before I found FDS, but even Pickme Me knew that was unacceptable, and told him it was over after I got home.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 06:02 PM
28

There was a dude in the RBN sub that made a post a while ago asking if he should contact his ex to apologize for his behavior during their relationship. He had apparently had some sort of epiphany about how all of his mistreatment of her mirrored his mothers mistreatment of him. They'd been no contact for 8 months, and itbwas just really clear that he was only doing it to ease his own conscience and try to worm his way back into her life. I called him out on it, but I'm damn sure he went and rei…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 05:45 PM
11

Seeing parents party around their kids bothers me so much. Its a 100% way to make sure that not only do I lose respect for that person as parent and a person in general, but I will also probably stop being their friend or hanging out with them at all. Like I understand getting a sitter can be hard and expensive, and they don't want to sacrifice their adult relationships, but if you can't get someone to safely and responsibly watch your children maybe you shouldn't be there. Its so trashy, it sho…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/08/20 04:34 PM
5

Men's issues with each other (the shitty way they treat each other as friends, male on male assault, their toxic af masculinity) are not our responsibility as women. What the fuck are we supposed to do when we can't even get them to treat us with an iota of respect most of the time. MRAs love to throw around statistics about how men are more likely to suffer at the hands of other men, but why don't they go fucking do anything about it. Where are the men opening up shelters for their abused peopl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 03:07 PM
9

Just ready to get his dick wet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/08/20 01:10 AM
26

I had a revelation about this this morning. I'm fat. I'm a size 16 right now, and I've never been smaller than a 12, not since middle school. And you know what? I fucking love my body. I feel like 95% of the time I look hot as hell. I wear clothes that I personally find attractive. I do my hair and makeup so in ways that make me feel pretty for me. I dont want to lose weight. If I genuinely wanted to be thinner I would be by now, but I dont want to be because my body is absolutely fantastic just…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 11:04 PM
24

I would be thrilled with an original, handmade ring if the person making it made professional quality pieces, used quality materials, and made it in an attractive style that would suit me. But if he's just gonna bend a plastic spork in a circle and stick a craft store rhinestone on it, I'll pass. I really firmly believe that an engagement ring should symbolize their commitment to you. A cheap quality ring means they dont care. There are absolutely high quality rings that can be found in a wide p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 05:05 PM
32

SHE SHOULD HAVE LET HIM JUST FUCKING DIE IN BOSTON.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/08/20 12:21 AM
92

Before FDS the most I thought I could ever hope for in a partner was that they didn't hit me often, and that they occasionally bathed themselves. The bar is is in hell.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 07:33 PM
7

😘😘😘😜
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 12:56 PM
13

His grammar and spelling just got more atrocious the more he typed. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 12:45 PM
8

🖤 We've got this. We deserve better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 06:37 AM
35

I needed this so badly today. Thank you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/08/20 04:14 AM
11

I've gotten pretty cut throat. 😅 this one got unmatched after I'd had a good laugh!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/08/20 06:56 AM
8

Um no, hes not your problem anymore. Don't extend the branch for him to swing off of, chop it off and let him free fall.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 09:57 PM
37

I grew up in a house full of holes and broken doors because my dad (and eventually my brother as well) could never control his temper and emotions. I had to live with them for a few months hast year, and the door to my room was so broken that it couldn't even hold a doorknob in it, and the frame was missing a huge chunk of wood next to where the lock would have been because it got kicked in. I had to put a sheet up against the wall where my bed was, because the drywall was crumbling from being p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 08:02 PM
1

My favorite is when women dye their pit hair fun colors! Ive been thinking of growing mine out to dye it pink when the weather cools down and I can let it get long again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 05:38 AM
3

I wonder if all of these LVM video game addicts maybe got way too much screen time as kids, and it just fried their brains. They've never known anything thats not on a screen, and they can't pull themselves away to live in the real world. Sad as fuck, but they'll never do anything about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 05:32 AM
7

Men who expect their children to share their hobbies annoy me. Maybe it's because my dad was a huge sports person and constantly shit on all of my interests and ultimately abandoned me to go coach football to other people kids... but how about you have a kid with the intention to help them grow into their own fucking person?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 05:29 AM
1

Its not at all too much to ask for! Look at dating as an audition to the rest of your lives together. A man should be proving to you now that he will gladly care for and provide for you. In long term relationships and marriage men tend to benefit a lot more, just not from material aspects. Women tend to bear the bulk of the emotional and mental labor in relationships, we tend to do most of the household labor, and are overall usually more giving. Most LVM get worse as time goes on and they get m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 05:19 AM
4

Because he hasn't come to terms with the fact that he wants to fuxk his homies yet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/08/20 03:52 AM
9

Because we have been conditioned to think that the male ego is more important than women's safety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:15 PM
25

I cant speak for weight lifting, but bellydancing utilizes pretty much every single part of your body. You wind up becoming extremely aware and very connected to yourself in ways that maybe you wouldn't have otherwise, at least it did for me. Bellydance classes also tend to be extremely women dominated, if not woman exclusive spaces, and the women in those spaces are extremely supportive of each other. I actually connected with my best friend through bellydance, and when we were dancing regularl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/08/20 07:12 PM
13

This is the advice that I absolutely need, and need to follow, but desperately don't want to hear. I hate phone calls. I was conditioned growing up to NEVER touch the phone, and was repeatedly beaten at a young age for answering or trying to make phone calls to people. I know that the best way to get past my aversion is to just do it and practice making calls. The fact that most of these would be men I'd never talk to again anyway should be incentive to practice and prevent wasting my time in th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 10:26 PM
7

And this is why (when the pandemic is over and its safe to go out again) I won't accept cheap coffee or drink dates. Ive come to realize that guys who want to go on cheap or free dates are usually playing the numbers game as hard as they can, and going out almost every single night with any woman that says yes to them. I've been that girl plenty of times. A cheap date suggested too early means he's just looking to pump and dump. At this point I won't say yes to anything that doesn't show hes wil…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/08/20 06:36 PM
36

He doesnt hit you, but he will hit everything else in the house. Walls, doors, windows, furniture, televisions. You live in a house full of holes and broken things now because he can't control his rage, and you walk on eggshells because you know someday he's going to run out of things that aren't you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/08/20 04:42 PM
7

I know I'm expecting too much. There isn't even a bar anymore, is there?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 06:06 AM
8

Re: 2. After a reasonable amount of time I'm tapping out. Sorry if you didn't cum dude, but I want to be able to use my vagina later this week.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 05:36 AM
41

Its fucking crazy. Men in healthy, satisfying relationships who treat their partners like equals and value them dont have an issue "getting" sex from their partners. If these men put a fraction of the effort towards healing their toxicity and being healthy partners as they do scheming and trying to manipulate us into getting sex, they wouldn't HAVE to sit there sceming up ways to manipulate us into having sex with them. Rationally it just doesn't make sense. At all. I know Its probably because t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/08/20 05:30 AM
60

Its 100+ outside at night and men in my area still have the audacity to suggest park dates. Like I want to get all done up just to sweat my tits off?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 10:46 PM
9

Sure you did, honey.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/08/20 10:44 PM
34

Look at how mad men already get at us for discussing how to not be taken advantage of financially.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 09:32 PM
20

I've realized its a lot like the hate that the childfree subreddit gets. There are some people that give it a bit of a bad reputation. But the overwhelming majority of the community are kind, supportive, empathetic people (often women) who are harshly judged and labeled terrible because they dont just bend over and accept the shitty hand society is trying to deal them. The people who have a huge problem with them are angry because this is a whole community of people that can't be controlled now.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 06:40 PM
44

I ruined the Kissing Booth 2 for my friend because I kept shouting "LET HIM DIE IN BOSTON!" At the TV. I stand by my statement, she should have let that fuckwad die in Boston.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/08/20 01:30 AM
46

ITS A UNIVERSAL FACT. For real, I cant remember who I saw say it first, but it resonated with me. Im a big fan of a full beat of glam makeup every day on myself, and its crazy the number of dudes who think im looking natural because my eyeshadow is brown and my lipstick is a nude pink is way too damn high.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 06:31 PM
41

I'm sure they know. Their dad was a fucking creep in so many ways, it was fucking disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 05:49 PM
89

Oh he absolutely expects sex already. He probably expects it the entire way through her pregnancy up until she goes into contractions, and then to start again the day she gets home from the hospital. He probably has some gross pregnancy fetish. I had an uncle like that, he and my aunt had like 14 kids and she was ALWAYS pregnant. They weren't religious at all, it was clearly some gross fetishizing behavior. 🤢
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 05:35 PM
25

I really wish someone had explained this to me when I was younger. Coming from a home where my oarents clearly didn't love me, my affection starved ass ate all of this up for years. It never ends well.. We really, really, REALLY need to teach young women about how dangerous love bombing can be. It's a really effective tool abusers will use to lure and trap vulnerable women into abusive relationships.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 03:23 PM
18

Oh my god, the number of grown men who act like assembling some ikea furniture is tantamount to cutting down a tree and building the dresser by hand... I've given up asking for help from any man in my life to put togetherfurniture, they just whine the whole time and do it wrong because they can't follow directions. Unless I need them to hold something because its too large to do alone I'll just do it myself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 03:16 PM
176

Most men also think that if a woman isn't wearing blue eyeshadow and red lipstick she's not wearing any makeup.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/08/20 02:47 PM
18

My roommate and I spoil our pets. Im cooking a quiche for us right now and made a tiny, dog friendly one for our puppy. Hes 5 months old and has more toys, treats, and clothes than most kids do. And our cats have whole pieces of expensive, stylish furniture that are exclusively for them to lounge on. I find a good litmus test for men is to talk about how I treat my pets. I have no problem gushing about them and all that we do for them, and if someone acts like its stupid or wasteful I know to ni…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/08/20 07:30 PM
123

Its funny how men not respecting each other always becomes womens problem. What the fuck are we supposed to do about it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 02:21 PM
66

I feel like this is just him trying to rationalize his controlling behavior. He knows most of the men on Reddit will agree with him on an average day. By posting it he can have his behavior validated, and then if she complains he can bring up the post and show her allllllllll of the people who agree with him. Its not him showing emotional intelligence, he's trying to legitimize his shitty behavior.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 02:04 PM
4

They gotta try to gaslight us from calling out blatant pedo shit. How else will they get away with having it LITERALLY EVERYWHERE?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 04:19 AM
122

I'm so glad I will never bring a child into this world. Its not safe for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 04:09 AM
67

Oooh, you're gonna be here a while. You should put your feet up and take that popcorn.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 04:07 AM
4

Oooh, I got it too! Like a fucking parasite. Make sure to report all his crazy fucking nonsense for harassment. Funny to know that not having children because that's the only surefire way I can think of to protect them from pedophiles makes me a pedo! Guess I'm really doing my due diligence then, huh?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 04:05 AM
43

They absolutely are! Trust your intuition when it tells you something is off! I promise, you are not crazy, you are a sane person trying to have normal, healthy boundaries. People looking to abuse you will try to tell you that your boundaries are unfair to them, that you're making it too difficult, that you're being unreasonable. If they cared and had your best interests at heart they would understand your boundaries and give you the respect you deserve. Don't let others treat you in ways you wo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 01:36 AM
63

The ones where we don't just let men have free use of our bodies and emotional labor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 12:29 AM
183

I want to force you to trauma bond with me, and then dive into a sexual conversation after I've made you vulnerable, so that you confuse my manipulation with intimacy! Because everything is about my dick, and you're not a real person to me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/08/20 12:27 AM
3

He never once made a disparaging comment about my body. Never. He only said positive things to me, and while he made it very clear that he found me drop dead sexy, I never felt objectified by him. Sexually he was extremely generous. The only times he didn't go down on me were when I wouldnt let him. He respected all of my boundaries, and never pushed me to do anything I was uncomfortable with. He was never degrading during or after sex, always made sure I was taken care of and completely satisfi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 07:49 PM
27

I had a FWB like this. Dude showed up for me constantly when I needed him, not just for sex. He wasn't someone who I saw myself ever dating, but at the time I wasn't in a place where I wanted to date seriously anyway. He actually raised my standards hella high, because even though we weren't dating he naturally treated me like a queen from the start. I definitely wouldn't get into a similar arrangement these days, but if a fuckbuddy can treat me so well without hesitation I know I can expect bet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 05:28 AM
3

This makes a lot of sense. I think the neighborhood dogs all know my roommate and I are kind ladies, because we have dogs come up to us almost weekly. The way that they built the fences in our neighborhood makes it super easy for big dogs or pairs of dogs to push and wiggle out from under them. And we have a ton of dogs who love to run/wander, and they always wind up at our house. Ive never met so many dogs before we moved here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:52 AM
10

Having to worry about protecting my children from a growing army of pedophiles wasn't originally a reason I chose to be childfree. But especially the last few months have made me so grateful that I got spayed. I couldn't imagine bringing a child, especially a daughter, into a world full of people who are going to view them as a sexual object from birth. Its disgusting, but literally the only real way I can know for certain a child of mine would never be abused or sexualized is to not bring a chi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 04:48 AM
44

Its crazy. In those two years she could meet a completely different man who actually wants to marry her and have a life together. Why waste two years on "well he said we would get engaged." Thats not even married in two years, you can bet he will drag the engagement out as long as he can to avoid marrying her.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 03:24 AM
60

Leave. Hes not going to marry you. He is already happy with his forever girlfriend situation, and he has strsight up told you he doesn't see a reason to change it. If you want to get married that's great, but its not going to be to him. Walk away with your dignity and go live your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 03:07 AM
33

This sounds like an addiction. 8-10 hours a day is a full time job. Why are you letting dating apps run your life? Honey, you need to delete them and maybe focus on living your life for you, not living it to meet someone. That's hours of your life you're using for what? Think about al the things you could replace it with that could be so much more fulfilling! Meeting a partner is great, but it shouldn't be the main thing you're doing with your life! Please, I'm begging you, go live your life for…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 02:52 AM
13

Look, he doesn't give a fuck about you. He never did, and he only half assedly showed up when you threatened to leave the first time. Why bother wasting emotion on someone who didn't care about you to start with? If you hadn't ended it he'd keep treating you like shit until he found someone he was into. Don't let men use you to pass the time. Demand respect. Demand they be active in their pursuit of you. Give a fuck about yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/08/20 02:37 AM
7

Dick is abundant even when you don't want it. Dick is like sand at the beach.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 11:31 PM
4

Theyre not, theyre on Facebook. I would love a childfree cat sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 07:29 PM
7

Actually show up, support, teach and raise his kids? My dad couldn't be bothered. But when there was even a slight opportunity to scream at, belittle, or beat us he was right there every time!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 06:33 PM
5

I remember watching my siblings while my parents locked themselves in their room to get high together. Its another kind of hell to be internally crying for help from your parents while trying to stop fights, clean, make food, and care for their children, but too afraid to say anything because you know if you knock on that door or don't keep them all quiet enough your dad is going to bust out of his room to scream at and beat you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 06:10 PM
11

Ooooh, I didnt even know there was a childfree foodie group! Im in like two different ones for cats, though! Im gonna have to find the foodie group! The childfree sub was so instrumental to me when I was first seeking out sterilization! I went into my initial appointment so much more confident and prepared thanks to all of the advice they gave me!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 05:27 PM
3

Supporting our women friends is SO important!! My best friend had a rough week, so I bought her a bouquet of flowers and put them on her work desk for her. When I'm feeling down she always has something to pick my spirits up, too. We do things for each other all the time just to make each other smile because we love each other so much.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 04:25 PM
40

Its honestly so refreshing! Outside of specifically childfree spaces I've never interacted with so many other CF women before!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 04:09 PM
26

My mom started leaving me with my younger sisters when I was 8 and they were 2 and an infant. Who the fuck leaves an 8 year old with an infant? Guess who got to learn how to change a diaper on the fly and then got yelled at for doing it wrong? Fuck adults who use the children in their care as free childcare for the others. I vehemently call out anyone in my social circle who does it with their own kids. It disgusts me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 02:59 PM
18

The right man maybe wouldn't pull out of the driveway until everyone in the car has their seat belt buckled.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/08/20 05:06 AM
6

This is reeeeeeealllly standard shame-y. Please don't imply others are materialistic for not wanting to go halvsies on a vacation with their partner. Maybe you should take a minute to reread the sub rules and the handbook.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 02:43 PM
47

Dates aren't as nuch of a time commitment for men. Even if they're pulling out all the stops to get ready, showing, shaving, cologne, and a nice change of clothes, thats still less than an hour to get ready. It takes me over an hour just to do my hair, and thats not counting the time its hanging out in the rollers while I do my makeup.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 02:21 PM
18

So close, and yet so far.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 03:18 AM
52

My bestie and I go on trips together all the time, and theyre so much more fun than any trip I've ever taken with a man.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 01:47 AM
42

And they're not truly competitive about anything! They're just aggressive and sore losers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/08/20 01:44 AM
20

We should make men start watching more documentaries about birds.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 11:42 PM
12

You have this AMAZING life going for you! Do not accept men who are downgrades! Unless he has a medical reason not to have one, not having a car at 36 with his current work situation is a huge red flag. Why doesn't he have one? Is his credit too poor to get a car loan? Did he get his license revoked due to accidents or drunk driving? Is he uninsurable? Is he too broke to afford to drive? Do you want to wind up being his chauffeur forever if you wind up dating him? There are a lot of harsh questi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:50 PM
13

I've talked a lot on here about how abusive my father was. And I think it really, really, really shaped the kind of men I've dated and my own agency (or lack thereof) in my relationships. All of my LTRs have been deeply abusive in a lot of the ways I was familiar with growing up. Ive always bent over backwards for men, even men i dont really like. Giving everything and asking for less than nothing in return because I didnt feel like I deserved it. A few weeks ago I genuinely thought that I would…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:39 PM
11

It helps to remember that those comments he made weren't from a genuine place. They were designed and said specifically with the intention of hurting you, lowering your self esteem, and making you smaller in your own life. They aren't any more true than if he had tried to convince you the sky was green with purple stripes. It can be hard to let them go, but lies designed to hurt you dont deserve space in your mind.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:28 PM
77

The bare minimum? Psh, thats way too much effort for most of them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:17 PM
115

Remember that you are not leaving mid date. The date ends when you decide. If his behavior has pushed you to leave then that is the natural conclusion of that encounter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 07:10 PM
36

Two of my worst were Geminis, and one was a Sagittarius. I agree, gemini men are evil beyond all hope.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 06:54 PM
40

I had two different men complain about seeing me in the same lingerie more than once. Apparently it's a one time only outfit in their eyes, because seeing it more than once was "boring" and "low effort." 🙄🙄 I've never spent another penny on lingerie after that again. If they want to see me in it they can be the ones to pay for it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/08/20 01:13 AM
6

Yeah, which is what makes it so absurd and inappropriate. OP deserves healthy boundaries.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 07:40 PM
8

I think they're trying to ask why you are Mormon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:19 PM
11

Oh my god, he thinks he's Barney Stinson.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:13 PM
52

Nah. Don't travel to men unless they're sending you money for your transportation and accommodation so that you can safely book it all yourself. Otherwise he needs to come to you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:05 PM
60

Oooh, that sounds super worth it. If/when I start going out and dating again I will probably sign up for a subscription.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 03:03 PM
152

Can someone give me good reccomendations for how to check people out? I always year about people looking up shady dudes and finding some pretty scary stuff, but i honestly have no idea what sites are legitimate to use and what ones are just going to lead nowhere or are scammy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/08/20 02:47 PM
33

Why is he complaining about what he apparently doesn't want anyway?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:32 AM
10

What a waste of such lovely handwriting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 10:31 AM
8

I would really encourage you to be extra careful with him and your youngest. I commented here on how my own father, who didn't want children, really fucked me up by letting me know that he didn't want me. If they can have a healthy relationship that's great, but men who dont want their children rarely care about how their actions and words affect those children.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 06:06 AM
17

My father would do this. He didnt want children to begin with, and I know that he forced my mother to have an alarming number of abortions over the years because he would throw it in her face all the fucking time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 06:00 AM
1

I have MAJOR anxiety around driving. I dont personally drive right now because of it. A man's ability to recognize that and drive extra safely, leave an over cautious amount of space between us and the next car, go the speed limit, and make safe lane changes extremely far in advance because sudden changes make me nervous without making me feel bad for it is definitely a HV trait to me. I've dated men before who were extremely reckless drivers and my anxiety would be through the roof just thinkin…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 05:41 AM
17

I hope you keep her safe from him. My father didn't want any of his children, and forced my mother to have probably over a dozen abortions over the years. From a very young age he started telling me that having kids was the worst thing anyone could do and it absolutely ruins your life. It took me until my 20s to realize how fucked up it was that he felt comfortable telling his daughter constantly to her face that he basically hated her and felt she had ruined his life by just being born. It real…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 05:26 AM
8

I would be super uncomfortable with a ring that was a family heirloom, personally. Like, to start how was the marriage attached to that ring? I'm not crazy superstitious, but my aunt, cousin, and another woman all got married in my grandparents back yard and then all got divorced a few years later (bonus that my grandparents also got divorced). That shit has some power and energy imo, and unless the marriage was absolutely sparkling I dont want to touch it. Furthermore, I think it should stay in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:47 AM
52

If she was smart she'd hand the ring back, change out of the dress, and go live her life. She deserves so much better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:37 AM
14

Guess she spent all her money on that dress she paid for and couldn't afford some slacks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:36 AM
20

A man told me he has a cosplay fetish after I told him I make costumes competitively as a hobby. I told him that was a weird and gross thing to tell a stranger. Let him trip all over himself to apologize and restart the conversation, and then after he typed out like three paragraphs blocked him. Boy, my work is worth thousands and has won awards all over the country. If you want to get your dick anywhere near it buy a ticket and watch me kill on stage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:32 AM
11

Ugh, I feel your pain. I had a scrote move himself into MY PARENTS HOUSE with me when I was living there. He didnt ask permission from me or my parents, he just moved all of his shit in and let me know that if i didn't support him he would be living on the street and it would be my fault. He was disgusting, and made my life so fucking miserable. I was suicidal the whole year we were together after he moved in and I had literally zero options. He wouldn't interact with my parents, and so he force…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:13 AM
64

No, yeah, I meant the same. Maybe its just poor luck but I honestly don't know if I've met 5 HVM in my entire life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:05 AM
29

Pickmes gonna pickme. 🤷‍♀️ Honey, if you want to look like that, with your self described shitty tattoos, your foul mouth, and whatever else you've got going on there go right ahead. We don't care. But maybe your personality shouldn't be like 40% shitting on other women who you obviously feel are prettier than you because you never mentally developed past the 6th grade script of "pretty=vapid." Maybe you'd be happier. Maybe you'd be more secure in the fact that you already got picked. Why are yo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 04:04 AM
136

A year? Shit sis, where are you hanging out that you meet that many! I want to come!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:54 AM
86

I saw a post someone had shared on Facebook the other day about having a "praise kink." Like, that its supposed to be kinky/taboo for your partner to be kind and encouraging? Like that SHOULDNT HAVE ALREADY BEEN THE NORM. It was so sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/07/20 03:53 AM
61

Too much for them, maybe. But I understand, its really hard to handle how passionate, talented, vibrant, beautiful, and exciting I can be. I think thats its really brave of them to admit that they'll just never be able to keep up or do anything to impress me. Maybe someday, with time and work, they can have a well rounded personality too!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 04:41 PM
29

Thank you. 💖 Seriously, FDS is the first place I've actually even been able to share the all of the fucked up things my exes put me through without being told that I'm exaggerating, or I'm crazy, or I deserved it. There's a lot to heal from between him, other relationships, and my family's abuse, but I'm definitely making steps.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 04:28 PM
50

Its only taboo to apply financial responsibility as a virtue to men. Women are lauded all the time for being frugal, and demonized for being materialistic. Men are allowed to spend however much or little they would like without comment usually.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 04:14 PM
55

Oh my god, I had one reach out a few years ago and ask why I had trashed him to other people, because he had genuinely loved me and thought he had treated me well for our whole relationship, and didn't know what I was still so angry about. Idk, dude, it could have been that you were a fucking pedophile and that ad I grew into an adult myself and looked at teenagers I felt so disgusted that you were attracted to them and straight up groomed and raped me. It could have been that you cheated on me …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 04:08 PM
89

Yes, we absolutely only want you men for your money. 🙄🙄🙄 Despite the fact that one of the core principles of FDS is that we should not rely financially on a man. Or that there are constant discussions about the fact that being a HVM is not tied to wealth. Examples of HVM behavior that are not at all tied to money, but rather care and creativity are posted at least a few times a week. But y'all can't even keep a semi stable job to support yourselves. You bitch about women being gold diggers over …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 04:01 PM
67

HiMYM was one of my exes favorite shows, and he made me sit down and watch it with him more than once. A huge red flag should have been that he CLEARLY idolized Barney, and always felt like the women in the show were in the wrong. Personally I hate it. Ted is suuuuuch a classic "nice guy" who constantly shits on women while complaining that he can't keep a relationship. Barney is just a gross pickup artist. Robin only had so many character traits to make her the "cool girl" so that she's just ap…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 03:49 PM
9

I dont wish her any ill will. I just dont have an abundance of sympathy or respect.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 02:22 AM
7

And can you believe that that was my "good" relationship?? Thank God for FDS!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 02:05 AM
24

It was honestly so bizarre. She would do the WEIRDEST SHIT to try and fuck with me, like show up to his apartment to go change clothes in his bedroom after she got off work? He laid into me when he first told me he cheated about how I could NEVER confront her about it, and made it pretty clear he would get ugly with me if I did, so I was always embarrassingly nice to her. She STILL didn't get picked, though. All that and he still married someone else. I would feel bad for her if she wasn't so ob…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 01:57 AM
37

Fucking truth. I had an ex who cheated on me like a month into our relationship with his "best friend." He didnt tell me for months, and after I agreed to try and forgive him and work past it he just treated me like garbage. First off, he like IMMEDIATELY developed ED, which he blamed on me, and qas constantly mean to me because of. He also refused to stop being friends with her, and any boundaries I tried to set with them (don't drink together, don't hang out alone at each others apartments tog…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 01:39 AM
77

My parents absolutely raised me to accept their abuse. I dont think they gave a flying fuck if others abused me too or not. Like, I dont think that they would care if they knew others had too. They'd probably just find a way to turn it around on me again, like they've repeatedly done when my sister has physically attacked me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/07/20 01:21 AM
35

Its definitely not something I would personally engage in at this point in my life. And it is absolutely not something thats going to be a long term benefit or lead to a HV, emotionally stable and healthy marriage. But I know some women, even here in the FDS community, feel that its a dynamic that would possibly work for them or will experiment with. If a woman is going to do it, she needs to be the one leading it. Men can't be trusted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 03:07 PM
194

In addition to not dating you he won't actually be your friend either. He will try to show up for sex when its convenient to him and leave when he's done. He will never treat you like a friend. He will never hang out with you outside of sex. He will never invite you to chill with his friend group. You'll likely be his weird sex secret while he talks to and dates other women, and then he will dip out when he gets bored and is ready to move on. If a man suggests a FWB situation to you run. That ma…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 02:39 PM
42

Test drive? What am I, a used Kia? 🙄🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:44 AM
30

Ohhh shit. I misread the sign and thought it was like for an arcade! Yeah, no, not cute. That poor woman.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:20 AM
92

I mean its cute if you're like 20-25, and met playing games as kids and were friends for a decade. But like, you can't date a woman for a decade and pretend that's cute. You especially can't announce to the world that you made her wait 10 whole years of dating before finally deciding you cant get a hotter younger woman, and if you wait any longer she will leave you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:17 AM
6

Oooooh, thats a good one too! I'm gonna steal that and try it out sometime!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:10 AM
180

I've just started responding "You go first! 🥰" pretending to make it flirty and then watch them burn themselves to the ground. Fucking sex pests.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 06:00 AM
166

Its happening to every single one of us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:16 AM
114

NEVER. I will NEVER again get involved with a gamer. Ive been ignored for countless hours, stood up, and ditched for video games by men. Ive given myself motion sickness so bad I spent the rest of the day vomiting trying to play them to bond with men who loved them, only to be belittled for not being good and having to take breaks. Today I came downstairs to my roommate mindlessly playing video games while his dog chewed on his wife's clothes next to him. I could accept an extremely casual "take…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 04:02 AM
6

He never even offered to get it fitted to my size.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 03:26 AM
4

Men dont live as long, women die alone all the time anyway. Live your life for you, not some fuckboy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 02:11 AM
2

I was really sad a few months ago that at 27 I wasn't on my way to marriage already. But then I lived with my bestie and her kind of LVM husband, and I started to have doubts that I was missing out. And then I found FDS and started to really evaluate my needs, and think about putting myself first. And now I could give a shit if I get married, honestly. I have my pets, I have fantastic friends, I am extremely talented and accomplished in my hobbies. I love myself in ways no man ever has, and I do…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 02:08 AM
161

Um, no. What the fuck, dude. You can't just save women for later. We aren't your Applebee's leftovers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:55 PM
26

I feel this so strongly. There are times lately where I am just so overwhelmingly angry at the world for the way myself and other women have been mistreated. Finding constructive outlets and loving myself so that I am stronger helps, but I'm still full if rage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:18 PM
19

Proudly. To my face. Like he thought that it was romantic that money didn't define our "love." We had only been dating 4 months at that point, and he had absolutely coerced me into saying yes. He proposed in a super public way while we were on vacation in another state, and had been making "joking" comments all weekend about leaving me there if I didn't like my Christmas present. I knew he was broke as fuck, I had paid for the whole vacation, and was honestly planning on leaving him because I wa…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 11:03 PM
10

I'm gonna sit my ass right here and focus on loving myself. If a man feels like he can make my life better somehow he can pull up and prove it. I will not budge another inch for men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 10:45 PM
25

Damn, you want a whole brand name ring pop??? What are you, the Queen of Sheba?? You should be happy with a dusty rubber band he found in his pocket. With the weed crumbs picked off and saved for later, of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 10:40 PM
23

Mine told me like 20 minutes after he gave it to me. He was literally so proud that he spent $0 on my tacky ass ring. Like, yeah, I was glad he didn't waste any money on that piece Walmart costume jewelry either, but not for the same reason. Not at all. I remember just having this horrified, panicked smile stuck on my face all night because I just couldn't process what was happening and how my life was going downhill on fire so quickly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 10:37 PM
19

You deserve a drink, cheese, and guac if you want it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:38 PM
81

HE DID. He genuinely thought asking for it back was going to hurt me. I hadn't worn it in months at that point, in fact I stopped wearing it period the second I moved out away from him and started exiting the relationship. Didn't even put it on when he came over before I got the guts to end it. I am still laughing, honestly. I bet he kept it to give to his new girlfriend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 07:34 PM
136

I got proposed to with a piece of scratched up tacky costume jewelry that was given to him by a friend of his. It was so ugly, and like 3 sizes too big for me. I was definitely coerced into saying yes and accepting it, and I fucking hated the damn ring. When I left him he asked for it back and I laughed and tossed it in the box with the rest of his shit. Ive gotten nicer jewelry for myself from Goodwill.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 05:58 PM
11

Nah. Hes just fucking gross and doesn't want to put a single second of his time into cleaning himself. How do I know? I've dated not just one, but TWO men who I had to constantly beg, bribe, nag, or fight to get to preform basic grooming tasks like showering, washing their hands, and brushing their teeth on any kind of regular basis. They werent depressed. There wasn't anything wrong. They just didn't want to be clean because they were filthy disgusting people. I bet she has to clean up after hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:31 PM
6

Look, if you think its a problem, its a problem. If it wasnt bothering you so much you wouldn't be here trying to validate if it is or isn't. So why are you tolerating it?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:28 AM
7

Same! Im kind of seething that none of the multi picture photos load fully on mobile.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:22 AM
11

Four years is a really long time for him to not progress in life to the point where he can move in with you. I don't know how old you are, but unless you're right out of high-school or college you might want to rethink if he's the partner you really want to spend your life with. You're worrying about what he and his family are going to think of you for making moves to improve your life, but you should really be worried about the fact that you put your life on hold for so long waiting for him to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 06:16 AM
5

I would love to have something like this for all of my costumes some day. 😍😍😍😍 Its so beautiful and classy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:54 AM
7

Lots of women don't like to cook?? And we live in a time where, depending on your location and socioeconomic status, choosing to cook at home is totally optional. Cooking is something that I love to do. But I only do it because I enjoy it, and I only cook for people that I love and care about. Do things that bring you joy and do them on your own terms, not because someone else told you you have to!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:36 AM
55

My ideal home with a partner is at least a 3 bedroom space, despite the fact that I dont want kids. I feel like it's extremely important that I have my own space and they have theirs, no matter how much we enjoy spending time together.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 03:33 AM
3

You're not alone. 💔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/20 12:46 AM
14

.... So like a dog? We're supposed to teach them like a puppy. Do the dishes. Have empathy. Brush your teeth. Sorry, boys, I already have a puppy. You're an adult, there's literally nothing stopping you from growing into the best version of yourself other than your laziness and entitlement. It's not my fault your parents didnt teach you anything about being an adult or a partner. Take some fucking responsibility.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 07:37 PM
147

Men never do anything! Its always their friends!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 06:23 PM
25

The conversation you were supposed to have wouldnt have changed anything. At worst it would have just bought him more of your time. You absolutely did the right thing for yourself. He made it very clear he wasn't going to make you a priority, so its up to you to put yourself first always. He will live.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 06:21 PM
37

My friends husband is like this. Hes a call auditor who works from home, and yet he still complains constantly about how exhausting his job is. All he does is listen to calls that have already happened all day in the comfort of his home office.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 11:32 AM
3

The saddest thing is that if he actually has a chance to, he will 100% drive there, sleep with her, treat her like garbage over it, and continue to say these horrible things about her. He will act like the way he's treating and talking about her is HER fault. I genuinely hope that this is just some racist,, self mastabatory hate fantasy so that no real women are at risk of dealing with him. What a disgusting excuse for a human.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/20 05:50 AM
6

You can see how triggered he is by the sporadic and loose grasp of grammar. 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 10:12 PM
4

Everyone could benefit from therapy, even if they don't suffer from mental illness or have any apparent trauma/issues to work on. You might not personally see anything that you want to work on from the start, but everyone has some stuff that they could work through better with a therapist. You can work on communication skills, coping mechanisms, and tricks to lead an overall healthier life mentally. You don't have to be going super frequently, but a man who goes on a consistent basis and is prep…
/r/askFDS26/07/20 09:37 PM
19

My cats are two of the most important things in my life. I will 100% stop responding to a dude in conversation and drop him if he says he doesn't like cats, or pets in general. Sorry, I dont have time for anyone who isn't enthusiastic as hell about animals. Someday I would love to have the time and resources to foster kittens or puppies, and I want a partner who will be on board for that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 05:52 PM
7

You know what, maybe I am a little salty that I've never had anything like this. But why would I put down another woman who does have it? Good for her! I love seeing examples of women being loved, valued, and treated well. As a woman I cant understand not wanting something like this to happen to every other woman on the planet (maybe not a computer and a handbag specifically, but a seriously thoughtful gift given by someone who is doing it just to bring them joy).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 05:46 PM
23

Well maybe if men didn't have such a problem washing their hands....🙄
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 05:03 PM
37

This is why being a pickme is so dangerous. Pickme women don't just fuck up their own lives, they will throw anyone they can under the bus in order to get and keep ANY man. Shes happy to ruin her daughters opportunities in order to keep her scrote complacent. I genuinely hope that her daughter has stronger role models who will teach her that that is NOT normal or acceptable behavior. She deserves better than her mother.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 04:57 PM
10

I've stayed for way too long with financially illiterate men who used me for money because I was so afraid of being seen as shallow and materialistic and obsessed with money. In one of them I was seriously considering suicide because I didn't know how I, a student working part time for $9 an hour, was going to be able to pay all of mh own bills and his on top of them. I had several thousand dollars saved when we started dating, and iver the course of a year I was constantly on the brink of overd…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 04:36 PM
35

Which country has the lowest population of men?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 04:38 AM
17

I'm 26, but had a bilateral salpingectomy at 22. I am VERY serious and vocal about the fact that I am childfree, and that I am uninterested in men who have, want, or are undecided about if they want children. One of the things I am very serious about wanting from a partner in order to consider marriage is that he would commit to a vasectomy, if he hadn't sought one out already. I would 100% rather be single my entire life than be left by a fence sitter who decided he wanted kids, or be blindside…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/20 03:15 AM
12

Every single thing. My dad isn't just a LVM, he's a straight up NVM. I'm estranged from my family now, because they are all wildly abusive people, but growing up with him was really scarring. Was constantly abusive. Physically, verbally, financially. Almost all of my early childhood memories are violent ones. Him and my mother getting into fist fights. Him screaming in my face about what a retard I was for not folding towels his preferred way when I was like 8. Him forcing my brother and I to fi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 01:35 AM
57

As someone who has been hit by multiple men because of their insecurities, it honestly feels pretty plausible. Men love to get violent with you when they feel like shit about themselves, it doesn't matter what its about.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/20 12:12 AM
2

Maybe when its finished! Right now its just 10 layers of petticoat and skirts. Im drowning in organza.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/20 04:38 PM
3

Any time a man puts other women down in order to compliment you, you should view it as a giant red flag. There is no reason a man can't just give you a compliment. It shows that he doesn't have any respect for women, and you will not be the exception to that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 11:55 PM
3

Its a wonderful life. I highly recommend it!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 09:37 PM
43

As an adult I am so mad at how relationships were portrayed to me growing up. No wonder I spent an entire decade as a huge pickme. But my god I just want to make all the pretty princess dresses for myself. Fuck having a prince charming, I just want to be draped in satin and rhinestones.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 09:01 PM
10

I'm so glad I got myself spayed. To not even be on the radar of these men is wonderful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 08:57 PM
93

I'm in the middle of designing this massive original Cinderella ballgown. Every time I rewatch any of the movies I cant help but make snarky comments to my cats about what a dumb fuck the prince is. But its true. Ive had so many fucking men come up to me in costume and just fawn over me, only to have exactly ZERO clue who I am outside of being dressed up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:46 PM
26

I'm only 5'3", but apparently I look MEAN in public. Most of the time its because I'm reading something in my phone and get this intensely angry face when I'm reading I guess? I dont know, but it keeps a lot of the random men away extremely well.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 04:35 PM
12

At this point in my life I give my friends one very stern warning that I do not want to talk about or hear about my exes. I am extremely strict on emptying my life of my exes so that I can cleanly move on with my life. No reminiscing, no second chances, were done. Any friends that can't accept that can go righr out the door behind the ex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 05:56 AM
8

A weighted blanket won't suck their dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 03:26 AM
13

Respect isn't something you should have to be worthy of. Their lack of respect says nothing about you, but it speaks volumes about who they are at their core. You are healthier for not having them in your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/20 02:46 AM
11

For real, her point about women paying for extensions is super valid. I have depressingly thin hair, and if I could afford it I would have extensions all the time to make it look thick and gorgeous. Fuck that guy, I hope he goes bald as karma.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 11:19 PM
4

Poor dogs. I highkey wish I could just kidnap them all and give them the loving homes they deserve. LVM never care properly for their dogs.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 11:16 PM
229

While it probably is a very validating feeling to "show men what they're missing out on" in ways like this, the best revenge is to just cold move on with your life. There was a post on here that I saw yesterday about a woman who found out her boyfriend had another relationship, and she just walked away. Didn't give him the time to explain, didn't put her energy into any kind of vengeance, she just got on with her life and lived happy. That, I think, is the kind of energy we should be looking to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 08:33 PM
7

Of course! Sewing is my main hobby, so even though I'm not super fashionable myself I know a bit about it! If you ever need help finding or describing something feel free to hit me up! I'm always happy to help! 💖
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 05:32 PM
6

Ohhh, that hurt to watch. That poor girl didn't have to do that to herself, but she did.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 05:08 PM
16

Amazon has a great selection of green cowl neck tops! I dont know if it's a specific brand you're hunting for, but just looking through I saw some gorgeous ones that were very similar.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 05:05 PM
84

And yet any time the majority rules in favor of a woman, loads of them crawl out of the woodwork to complain how reddit is soooooooo biased towards women and how if the roles were reversed the OP would be the asshole. Except for the dozens of cases where thats not true, and where women are constantly vilified.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 04:37 PM
31

I had an exes mom do this! I was this shy teenager being actively abused by her son, and every time we left I guess she would talk mad shit about me. Apparently I was incredibly stuck up and thought I was better than all of them. In reality I was just sitting there anxious as shit afraid I was going to say or do something wrong.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 02:50 PM
13

Of course not. Its only us women who need to have our spaces policed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 06:14 AM
2

A nice pair of cufflinks or something to wear specifically for special occasions could be a thoughtful gift. But an engagement ring isn't just a gift, its a deeper symbol of commitment and a man's ability and willingness to provide for his family. Holidays are the time where you gift each other mutual presents. Asking for a gift in return for an engagement ring is like asking for a gift when you give someone one for their birthday.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 02:44 AM
3

Tons! Pamper the hell out of yourself! Take fancy bubble baths, rent movies you've wanted to see, cook or order yourself a special meal, get dressed up just to admire how gorgeous you are. Ive been really focusing lately on "dating" myself, and the result is that because of it I dont miss the affection or attention of men nearly as much. Fill your calendar full of self love and healthy indulgences.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 02:34 AM
4

Look, most men age like a cracked bottle of two buck chuck.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 02:27 AM
7

I would pay my share in that situation, but she would be getting the absolute bare minimum tip. What kind of woman throws another woman under the bus like that on a date?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 02:03 AM
60

My first boyfriend never wanted to eat anything that wasn't Alfredo. I ate shitty jarred Alfredo sauce every weekend, sometimes multiple times, for three fucking years. Alfredo disgusts me now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:04 AM
23

I'm laughing because ever since Ive found FDS I actually feel like a vastly happier person. The community here has given me so much strength, and has helped to convince me that I deserve to be treated well. Not just by romantic partners, but by friends, family, and literally anyone in my life. If not accepting disrespect and abuse means that I'm a bitter person, I would prefer to be bitter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 01:00 AM
40

Oh my fucking God. I hate when theyre like "ask me questions." How about instead we have a fucking conversation and get to know each other that way, instead of me trying to come up with questions to stroke your ego while you ask me nothing about myself and make this whole process excruciatingly painful? If I wanted to play 20 questions theres an app for that, and we are not on it. Fuck off with your "ask me quarions."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/20 12:48 AM
6

I'm so glad that I opted for sterilization. So few men deserve the gift that is having their child brought into the world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:06 AM
10

I think I've only ever been with one man who felt like he actually kind of liked my personality and being around me. And even he was a total scrote at the end of the day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 01:01 AM
21

This is a big mood, and part of why I've really stepped away from dating. Its exhausting to have the same conversations over and over again with men who can barely conceal the fact that they only see me as a warm set of holes. At this point if a man wants to take me out I have to feel pretty impressed by him, because I would rather stab myself in the thigh than sit through another date like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:59 AM
6

I definitely endorse getting a dog! My roommate and I just adopted one, and even though hes only a puppy right now he's already 40lbs and I feel exponentially safer having him around. We take him everywhere we can, so if anyone is watching us they will see this rapidly growing, incredibly strong, and very loyal dog all the time. His barks are already pretty deep too. Ive never thought of myself as a dog person before, but just the peace of mind having him around brings is incredible!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/20 12:41 AM
25

Can we please try not to use peoples sexuality as an insult or way to demean anyone? There are a lot of very valid criticisms of men's behavior, but attributing it to being gay isn't constructive or really accurate, nor is it kind to members of FDS who are a part of the LBGTQ community. There are maybe better ways to phrase the point youre trying to convey.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 02:50 PM
6

Oooh, this would be amazing to get some flowering vines to grow on! And then she could have an Eiffel Tower of flowers! 😍
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 02:41 PM
12

Up until just a few weeks ago I was incredibly worried about "the Wall." Im turning 27, and was freaking out because I felt like I was past my prime dating wise, and that if i ever wanted to find love i was going to have to be prepared to sacrifice literally everything for it. And I was prepared. Years of already shitty relationships and a lifetime of literal abuse from my family had worn my self esteem down to nothing. I would have done anything to be picked, and I was miserable. And after find…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/07/20 02:16 AM
155

That is also dependent on you having a passport, a budget for lodging, food and drink, transportation, luggage, a way to get to the airport, possible childcare costs or the ability to take them, up to date immunizations, time off, and a ton of other factors. Travel can be really, really difficult for people living in poverty in ways that aren't obvious on the surface. A trip to Paris could wind up being the same cost as several months of living expenses, and when youre paycheck to paycheck you a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 11:47 PM
15

I think a lot of the things that FDS teaches can be applied to any relationship, not just romantic ones and dating. A lot of what I really took away from the handbook was that I should hold the people around me to higher standards when it comes to how they treat me and what behaviors are acceptable if people want to be in my life. If he is giving you shady vibes as a friend, then he probably is shady and you would be better off without him. Just because you aren't looking to date him doesn't mea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 11:39 PM
3

Hell yeah! Finding the strength to leave a toxic relationship, especially when you're legally tied to them, is something to be incredibly proud of. Im sure every other woman here is proud of you too. Sorry, boy, there's no room for shame over divorce here. We are too busy trying to live our best lives and support each other.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 04:28 PM
26

My best friends husband is like this. We all live together, and there are some days on the weekends where he will play the SAME EXACT GAME for 16 HOURS. I do the manority of the housekeeping in exchange for rent because I lost my job, so he literally only has two chores. Do their laundry, and clean up the dog poops from the back yard. And despite the fact that those simple tasks, which take less than two hours a week of dedicated time, are the only things hes asked to do, he has to be nagged con…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 04:14 PM
10

If he wants to, he will text you. He has your number and can pick.up the phone. Don't chase him, let him chase you if he wants you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 01:51 AM
7

Fucking truth. I use a Google voice number that isn't attached to my main email, just to be extra safe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/20 01:47 AM
63

Thats why we all need a safety net. Strong relationships outside of a romantic partnership, and a solid sense of self.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 08:13 PM
4

And one of my exes would complain when I asked him to pick me up from the train stop 4 miles from his house. I would literally take the train 40 minutes to go see him, then sit out there in the heat or the dark in a bad part of town for another half hour while he finished up his game, show, or whatever and decided if he was gonna come get me or not. 🤡
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 06:02 PM
21

Oh he is 100% trying to go after women in their early 20s. Im not a gambling woman, but I would put money on it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 05:54 PM
44

I ran into one of those fuckers in a group on Facebook the other day. He was whining about how at 50 he had been single for 12 years, and that all women wanted was to be party girl sorority types who just wanted his money. I didnt need to, but I was bored so I called him out on it and let him know that he was single because he clearly had no respect for women. He was 50, and looked like an 80 year old diabetic. I told him straight up that maybe if he was the type of man who a woman could stand b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/20 03:23 PM
5

Okay, but can they hurry up and die then so that the rest of us can get on with our lives?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 08:19 PM
168

What fucking void do these men have? Yall dont have a void inside of you, you're bored and unfulfilled in your lives because you refuse to do anything meaningful. Maybe pick up a productive hobby and make something instead of sitting on your ass pretending to kill people or jerking off all day. Fucking work on yourself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 05:50 PM
57

" Be grateful that society explicitly tells me I cant violently attack, kidnap, and rape you. Because if I could get away with it I absolutely would!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 03:52 PM
28

Its a more subtle way to brag about wealth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 06:50 AM
6

Is he actively working towards a better job to provide for you? Actions speak louder than words.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/20 06:47 AM
93

Not even like a hello or anything. This should be an immediate unmatch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 08:44 PM
2

I would have to really examine why I would be marrying someone in order to do it, and I would need a lot of willingness to work and commit to the long term health of the relationship if i were going to say yes and legally bind myself to someone. For one, I am childfree, and had a tubal at 22. I would need my partner to not only be childfree, but to commit to sterilization or have already had a vasectomy. Why? Because I'm not willing to bet on a man not changing his mind someday. Committing to me…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 06:14 PM
9

Set up exciting stuff for yourself throughout the week! Every day has gotten really monotonous over here, but I've tried to incorporate different treats for myself to bring a little extra joy into my life. A few times a week I'll have a loooooong, luxurious bath, with a face mask and maybe a glass of wine or some lemonade. I'll take some extra time to do my makeup nicely, just to admire how nice I look and feel good about myself. Cook a special, extra tasty meal just to treat myself. I guess in …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 05:56 PM
3

I didn't at all feel like this video was shaming anyone. I think that many of us are predisposed to reading more into things people say about themselves. Ive had the same thing happen here where I've spoken about my own personal experiences and how my mindset and tastes have shifted, and have then been accused of judging and belittling others. It might be healthier to try and take what other women say about themselves at face value, and agree to disagree with them if their values or tastes aren'…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 05:41 PM
29

My best friend in middle schools mom did this. My friend and her younger sister were both conceived through sperm donation, and even though her youngest daughter had a severe case of Downs Syndrome, she always said she was happier having done it alone. She was a therapist, and had seen her mom be forced to stay in an abusive relationship for decades because of religion, and I guess that was enough that she never felt the need to tie herself to a man to have her family. She worked so hard to buil…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/20 03:36 PM
3

I feel like therapy isn't super effective for people like that, especially when they're that wealthy. You have to REALLY want to work on yourself and make yourself a better person for your own sake. A lot of them going to "therapy" is probably more like them going to complain and be coddled for $2500 an hour. With that much money they really don't have to face reality as long as they dont get caught doing anything incredibly illegal, and even then they wind up finding ways to justify their shitt…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/20 12:19 PM
3

Have you tried taking the dogs out to like a dog park? My roommate and I take our puppy every night so that he can get all of his energy out with other dogs in an appropriate way. Now during the day he is so much sweeter and calmer, and way easier to cuddle. If its possible for you to do so it might be something to try with your parents dogs and see if maybe then they're better at coddling. Our puppy is a sharky little terror the next day if he doesn't get to go see his friends.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 11:39 PM
30

Comments like this on those posts have been so helpful to me, though. I'm one of those women who previously would have thought that I should put effort into clapping back at a man like that, and I realize now that my energy is better spent elsewhere. Block, delete, and move on is my go to now. So those posts maybe have a place just to regularly get the point across that women like me need to stop doing that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 11:27 PM
26

I'm going to buy my best friend flowers next time I'm out. She deserves flowers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 09:12 PM
8

I've really stopped going out because of this. I got so tired of men forcing me to say yes immediately that I have really given up. Im embarrassed about the number of people I've slept with, even though I didn't want to have sex with like 80% of them. I feel like at this point the only people I deserve are Nvm who are just going to see me as a sex object anyway because thats what I've let myself be turned into, and so my only option is to just be alone. 💔
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/20 05:59 PM
29

Because she wants to play the suffering Olympics. Okay, congrats, you won, your husband sucks the most.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/20 02:56 AM
201

Way to make a scene, though! These types of men are so reliant on the idea that women are going to be soft and do anything to avoid calling attention to problems in public. Fuck that, make a scene, call them out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 03:00 PM
38

Man, it must be humiliating to actually meet a person who only matched with you for your totally real, and not at all a bunch of crusty unwashed socks crammed down your boxers, Monster Dong, only to be forced to admit that you're packing a cocktail shimp and insecure as fuck about it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 02:57 PM
18

You have no idea how badly I needed this affirmation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 01:19 PM
36

I identify as bisexual, and I have this happen literally all the time. Ive started to honestly get mean with these people, because I figure if they don't respect me as a person why should I be patient, kind, or understanding? I'll point out that their dead bedroom and partners ED are not my fucking problem, and how vile it is that these straight couples are so willing to prey on bi and pansexual women. It makes me sick and angry. I am so sorry that she put you in that situation. You deserve dras…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 12:36 PM
10

I dont personally care for shows that make a game out of human connection. The Bachelor, the Bachelorette... Hulu keeps showing me adds for one about a woman who is going to have a baby with her game show dude???? Honey just have your baby on your own, don't tie yourself to some dude just because he won the most fake points in your game! There are so many iterations of these shows, and they all just squick me out. Love shouldnt be a reality gameshow topic, it sends sooo many toxic messages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 12:27 PM
8

I haven't read the original material, so forgive me if I'm wrong, but isn't physical touch also not supposed to be about sex? I thought that it was supposed to be more about comforting/intimate nonsexual contact, like hugging, kissing, hand holding.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 02:01 AM
6

Your friends need to respect your boundries and stop telling you shit about him. I have a handful of mutual friends with exes, and I make it very clear to them that I want ZERO information on my ex after we break up. If they can't respect that and keep the conversation away from them, we can't be friends. I've found since that the ones who couldn't were purposely trying to feed me information so that they could gage my reaction and help him stroke his ego. It doesn't matter how he's treating her…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 01:56 AM
23

Men who don't know the first thing about makeup critiquing women's makeup us one of my biggest pet peeves. They can't even be bothered to moisturize or pluck the mammoth sized caterpillars they call eyebrows, but they're gonna say something about the way we do our makeup? Fuck no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/07/20 01:52 AM
3

Say the men who dont properly wipe their asses.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 03:04 PM
25

If he had been more engaging about it my attitude would probably be different. But the way he asked made it very clear he wasn't actively interested in me. He could have asked if I was free on "X" day, or even sometime this week or next week. But it was literally just "Cool. Let me know when you're free." And then absolutely nothing after that. It just really rubbed me the wrong way.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 02:22 PM
7

THIS IS WHY WE DONT HOLD HANDS WITH STRANGE MEN.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 02:03 PM
5

He doesnt have an ounce of respect for you, so why give him a single second of thought? You deserve respect, honesty, and communication. You shouldn't have to settle for someone who is willing to build the foundations of your relationship on lies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 02:03 PM
19

I want to point out the frequency at which men lie about washing their hands. I've known way too many men who don't think its necessary to wash their hands after they use the restroom because they consider their dick clean. Maybe with the pandemic its gotten better, but I wouldn't trust them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 01:46 PM
9

Nice is the baseline. Nice is what we are taught to be to others in preschool. If he can not be nice to you, he is is severely lacking in his social education, and he needs to be left alone to go work on that himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 01:41 PM
24

I had a dude on OLD recently ask me if I would like to go to dinner with him. I said yes. He then just texted to let him know when I wss free. I left him on read. Could I give him some potential evenings Im free? Yes. But I feel like after that hes just going to pick one and then ask me where I want to go. And I'm not going to do all the planning. If he wanted to take me out he would be making suggestions, and I am not settling for a date with a man who is lukewarm about me at best and probably …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 01:35 PM
37

I have never, in my entire life, seen a sane grown woman stomp her foot and throw a tantrum. I've seen it in adults with mental disabilities, which is understandable. But never, out of all of the women I have seen and met in person, have I seen a single one stop her foot. But I have seen a lot of men say that we stop our feet to try and over dramatize us.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 01:28 PM
112

Someone free that poor puppy!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 12:44 PM
15

I dated a guy who had it a 27. For like an entire year out of the year and a half we were dating he couldn't get it up. It was reality sad and pathetic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 12:37 PM
111

Yes, that is in fact how time works.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 02:53 AM
40

Oh my god, I just came across this same profile word for word, but the genders were flipped. Is this some sort of copypasta maybe?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/20 01:34 AM
19

I wasn't allowed to celebrate or acknowledge my birthday for the entire three years I was with my first boyfriend. Why? Because it made him feel guilty. He didn't have a job the entire time we dated, and lived with his grandparents off their dime. And he was a pedophile who was 23 when I started dating him at 16. So to ease his guilt I gave up my birthday and let him continue to get away with his horseshit. On my 19th birthday we went with his grandparents to Golden Coral. Not because it was my …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 07:57 PM
4

Why is it always a goatee? 😓 None of them look good with it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 06:00 PM
11

They're out here confusing iron pyrite with gold. These men have nothing of value, not even a personality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:08 PM
9

Before Covid, there were three different art/street fairs going on a month in my city. One on the first, second, and third Friday of every month. There are also like 10 different big art festivals that go on throughout the year. Its free to go, look around, and there are always tons of free live performances going on. Ive told so many men I've been involved with that I would love to go, and do you know how many have gone with me to this totally free event that I suggested to them? Zero. So I go …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:06 PM
23

A lot of "ugly" men are ugly because they are lazy. Maybe if they put in some effort, moisturize, find a nice haircut, maintain their patchy ass beard, wipe their asses, wear clothes that fit and are presentable, and brushed their teeth with any kind of frequency they would have more luck meeting women. I for one am tired of having to teach every single man I date how to take care of himself. I'm not his mother. I'm not his personal assistant. This isn't an episode of Queer Eye, although those m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 01:43 PM
8

Oh queen, you deserve better than Hersheys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 01:20 PM
3

I read your comment before your edit, and I do want to commend you for being such a compassionate person. What you did was nothing short of heroic. But seriously, fuck this dude. He can go sit on a cactus and spin, you deserve better.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 06:21 AM
12

Its honestly so freeing once you get used to it! I used to feel bad for cutting people off, but after doing it I always feel so relieved.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 05:40 AM
36

Next time a man who has told you to lose his number sends you an apology, just text back "I'm sorry, who is this?" Or just block them to begin with and save yourself the hassle. Hes not hitting you up because he cares about you, he's just trying to stroke his ego and manipulate you into giving him your time/affection/body. Have you considered blocking him?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 05:31 AM
140

Bet he's got money to buy himself video games, beer, weed, or a porn subscription, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 04:11 AM
3

🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡🤡 Have fun at the circus, honey!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 04:02 AM
2

I think maybe you need to go back and re read my initial comment. I did not make a single comment about other women and their choices, only my own. Seriously, whats wrong with you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 03:32 AM
2

I don't recall mentioning you in my comment like that. I simply shared my own experiences and regrets in my own life. It sounds like you might be projecting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/20 02:12 AM
8

I sew, and men wind up absolutely hating my hobby once they find out that I will happily turn them down to sit there and make myself a dress instead. Idk if a man could ever satisfy me as much as a perfect French seam.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 09:18 PM
39

I've stopped asking why. Men seem to just do what they want, and theres nothing I can do to change or stop it. I can simply stop tolerating the ones who make the choice to treat me poorly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 08:42 PM
217

I've planned dates like this before, and done right they are soooo romantic. But you're right. Most dudes want to walk around a poorly lit park full of mosquitos on a Tuesday night.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 07:21 PM
5

It just kills me that they tried to call me out on being shallow for that. I have zero problem with men's height. I am 5'3", almost everyone is taller than me. 🤣 What I am not attracted to is the attitude that short men seem to have about it. Every one I've entertained expected me to constantly reassure him about it, and were often very aggressive as a way to make up for what they perceived as weakness due to size. I don't get involved with insecure and potentially aggressive men anymore. I valu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 05:52 PM
3

The first time I realized I wasn't cut out to be a mother was when I adopted a baby kitten that needed to be bottle fed still. He was so cute and sweet, but getting up every two hours to feed, potty, exercise, and then lull him back to sleep for several weeks all by myself was brutal. He was a difficult baby, and there were a handful of times I considered surrendering him because I wasn't sure I could take it much longer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 04:08 PM
22

Dingdingding! I was a dormat to men for years because my parents abuse at home taught me that I deserved for others to treat me poorly. Anything from men that wasn't immediate violent abuse was viewed as immense kindness and love. I genuinely believed, and still have a hard time not believing, that I am less than worthless, and that i should graciously accept any and all male attention I can get because worthless people like me don't deserve love. Abuse growing up drives so many poor young women…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 03:40 PM
8

I had a bilateral salplingectomy at 22, and 4 years later I am more confident than ever in my decision. Every day I think about how grateful I am to my surgeon and her team for trusting that I knew myself well enough to make that decision, and for supporting my choice. I still remember walking into her office with a whole folder full of information, ready to fight tooth and nail or walk if I didnt feel respected. And I was met with open arms by women who understood that this freedom from reprodu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 03:28 PM
10

There are a lot of "nerdy" men who hate that women have gotten so into superheros. They hate that it's created a viable market for female led superhero movies, like Wonder Woman and Captain Marvel. They hate when women get involved with really anything that they view as "theirs." Nerd culture has always been wildly exclusionary and critical of women, despite the fact that women creat a sizable amount of the media they consume and seem to worship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 03:02 PM
16

If he cheats, leave. If he wants to be with someone else so bad, let him have them. Men who will cheat are a dime a dozen, you can pick another one up on tinder that same day if you feel like it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:19 PM
13

I was that woman youre talking about. Who thought that it was empowering, and that if I liked a guy I should just fuck him because I wanted to. I obviously can not speak for every woman, but it didn't make me feel any better or more fulfilled, sexually or emotionally. It was great in the beginning, when I was having tons of fun and never felt lonely and it was fresh and exciting. Over time it just made me feel like garbage about myself, though. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely love sex, but I've…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 02:10 PM
196

I found out years after the fact that my first boyfriend spent the entire three years we were together cheating on me. Online, in person, everywhere, all the time, from day one. Fucking pedo scrote had me as basically his teenage bang maid in his 20s, and that still wasn't enough. And all of his friends knew. They knew he was cheating on me, that he was abusing me, and that I was underage, and all his scrote ass friends didn't say a fucking thing. As an adult it makes me sick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 01:59 PM
16

I will cook for them when they've earned it. Cooking for me is an act of love. I cook for my roommates because I love them. I cook for my pets because I love them. I cook for myself because I love myself. Sorry random dudes in my inbox, I dont even think I like you yet. You have to put in some actual work and show me you are worth me being in the kitchen for hours preparing you something special. If you're hungry go microwave a fucking hot pocket.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 01:43 PM
30

Just tape a fleshlight to a crock pot and leave us alone.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 01:39 PM
65

I tend to avoid getting involved with shorter men because I do not have the time, energy, or desire to deal with their height insecurity. There are so many men out there who just can't shut up about how women reject them because they're too short, and how it's all our fault. Typical male bullshit where, in order to validate themselves, they blame a woman for something lots of us don't actually care that much about. I have a friend who is the same height as her husband, and it makes me see red wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 01:17 PM
68

Its probably resentment. Ugly guys often treat women who put even the slightest effort into our appearance and grooming like garbage because they resent us. They have womens lives built up as this easy fantasy, where everyone just bends over backwards for us and treats us wonderfully because we are pretty. And they are angry about it, because no one is lavashing them with the amount of praise and adoration they imagine we get. Look at how they talk about us in those gross male subs. Men with low…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 12:50 PM
10

Scrotes will literally send a GIF instead of typing out a few words to start a conversation. Sorry boy, this isn't preschool, use your big boy words or go back to mommy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 12:43 PM
27

Hes not wrong. Every man that I've gotten involved with who is over 5 years older than me is just a garbage human. Abusive, financially incompetent, manipulative, a cheater.... and all of these lovely qualities wrapped up in a greasy package with a patchy beard. Pickme me was an idiot. 🤦‍♀️
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 12:41 PM
75

I grew up with a father who punched holes in walls, kicked in doors, and broke our families possessions. The frequency of his violent outbursts was pretty telling as to how soon it would be before he got violent with one of us. I will NEVER give a violent man space in my life. Even men who talk about having those "macho" violent, self mastebatory fantasies where someone disrespects or takes a swing at them and they have an excuse to be violent. It's disgusting. Dont let them fool you with the gu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 05:41 AM
5

My life just won't be complete unless a man hands me something thoughtless he grabbed off the shelf and couldn't be even bothered to gift wrap. 🙄 One year I had a nvm ex give me a bottle of dragonfruit rum for my birthday. I dont drink rum, and I really dont care for dragonfruit. When I probed him about it, he proudly told me had picked it out on his way home from work because they were giving out samples at Walmart, and the sample lady gave him a coupon. The scrote then drank the entire fucking…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 08:21 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter