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Winter_Inevitable Archive

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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
105

FIELD REPORT Winter_Inevitable/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 10:27 PM
31

NICE FOR WHAT?Winter_Inevitable/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 05:56 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
16

This is just a triangulation tactic to make you feel unworthy and not good enough. I had a VERY LVM ex a long time ago who withheld ANY compliments about my appearance, never told me I was beautiful, etc., yet who openly lusted after a certain type of 1950's pinup looking rockabilly chick all over social media. He ended up dating this other girl after me, and that girl and I became friends after he treated her like garbage, too, and comparing notes was interesting - he talked about me ALL THE TI…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/10/20 03:38 PM
3

BC causes these issues yet its all doctors seem to be able to give me for my endometriosis... yet I STILL refuse it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/10/20 08:23 PM
3

my ex who was a body builder had to take cialis to stay hard, and he was only 32
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 04:38 PM
7

My ex was a body builder, and had been a steroid user on and off for 10+ years. Testosterone FRIES. YOUR. BRAIN. Then I recently dated a guy who also admitted he'd been a steroid user for 20+ years, and that it has nearly killed him multiple times, and that his balls had shrunk to nothing. Yet he still used that toxic shit? I am attracted to muscles and big guys but blech they ALL juice. And it's gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/09/20 04:38 PM
8

Wow this reads like an actual alien wrote it. The G-spot DOES exist and IT IS THE MOST GLORIOUS OF ALL. A deep g-spot orgasm honestly is the best feeling and I cannot even describe, but it feels like heaven descending upon you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:19 PM
72

Also, if you treat a man like a sex object - say, you just want him to come over, fuck, then kick him out immediately - most will not accept this and will feign interest because they get off on women's affection, not just sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:01 PM
106

I was always iffy on FWB because in my experience, I don't always want a relationship. However, I am changing my tune. I had a FWB for a year, and when the pandemic hit we promised each other to be exclusive just to limit exposure. WELP, I recently found out he had a GIRLFRIEND the entire time. KILL IT WITH FIRE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/20 05:00 PM
49

This is 100% accurate. The most prominent stretch marks I have are on my hips that I developed when I was 12 years old from maturing quickly. MOST women have cellulite and stretch marks.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 11:23 PM
13

No, and in fact, I've met men who find them sexy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/20 11:22 PM
3

Men are visually stupid. They see signifiers like big lips, big butt, big boobs - or whatever else they are programmed to respond to due to pornsickness, and they are attracted to these individual body parts. Women see the whole person. I am told by women that I am beautiful a lot. By men, NEVER. I watch a lot of Youtube videos related to a specific autoimmune condition, and I am always blown away by how HV and stunning the women are - and they are always single. They are taking control of their…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/20 04:16 PM
18

My sister turned into a lesbian at like age 43. I honestly don't even know if she's a legit lesbian, but she'd just had enough of lame dudes and this much younger woman confessed her love for her and they decided to give it a go. Now they are getting married.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/20 05:59 PM
10

henny, I am 40 and only one guy has ever gone down on me long enough and with enough skill to give me an orgasm. And I have probably slept with 30-40 men. ONLY ONE. Even when they do get down there they don't know what they are doing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/20 05:50 PM
17

I have come across actual blind men on Tinder, one of which who said "even blind men are pigs."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/20 03:42 PM
55

I have posted this info many times, but men shut down when they see a wall of text. It doesn't even matter if all you did was detail your skincare routine. They see a lot of words, they think "shit, this chick is emotionally unloading on me." They literally PANIC and SHUT. DOWN. Just don't do it - EVER. Keep your texts to a sentence, max, PREFERABLY LESS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/20 05:02 PM
30

Millennial men have hella mommy issues. I don't want to paint a broad brush, because there are exceptions, but baby boomers were, in general, horrible parents who either flat out neglected their kids, or made them feel like they were actually legendary, leading to extreme low self esteem (cloaked in narcissism) OR extreme entitlement. Because so many mothers worship their sons, a lot of men grow up actually thinking ALL women's love is selfless and actually expect that of their partners.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 10:21 PM
15

I hate it when women are said to be moody, as in my experience nothing is moodier than a man. They act like sullen teens routinely.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/20 10:01 PM
33

This woman deserves a medal. If you've watched the season, she lives in absolute poverty and squalor, and chose THAT over this toad. Big Ed exemplifies the type of sex tourist who thinks "Western Women" are awful and instead poaches the impoverished because no one stateside will touch his worthless ass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/20 10:20 PM
3

I have used kik before. 90% of the user base are married or in a relationship looking for side action. If I found out a guy I was dating was on kik I would run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/20 05:29 PM
5

As someone with mommy AND daddy issues I've been with LVM parental seeker and unavailable man too many times to recall
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/20 04:51 PM
3

Unfortunately you aren't correct. Hot dudes are actually LESS shitty because they don't play games as often because they don't need to. Uglier/average dudes play the head games/fuck boy games, not hot guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/20 03:12 PM
14

What was your childhood like? I had to closely monitor my mother's moods because she was always pissed off. As a result, I have insane "empathic" abilities to gauge people's moods and I can pick up on every tiny change in behavior. Unfortunately in relationships its been a total curse... because I can ALWAYS tell when the end is coming because of my intuition.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 09:34 PM
5

Most of the men I work with don't even know how to set up a meeting. Seriously. I had to train them on SETTING UP. A MEETING. IN OUTLOOK. Now when I get an email from a guy that says "We should meet to discuss" I respond with "Feel free to schedule. My calendar is up to date." No more.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 05:44 PM
53

The minute you get anxiety and your spidey senses pick up on something being off, it's because your intuition is screaming at you and in my 40 years I have never had my intuition be wrong. Also, just because this friend is not attractive does not mean he's sleeping with her. It's probably been his on-again, off-again trusty pickme fuck buddy. A lot of LVM CANNOT be without attention for very long and will go back to their Plan B when your attention is scarce. Short version: you dodged a bullet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 05:31 PM
66

They hate overweight women because women can be overweight (quite a bit overweight) and still have dick constantly thrown their way and men are insanely jealous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/20 05:24 PM
2

So many punk ass LVMs in this movie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/20 04:19 PM
8

If I have sex with a guy, and he has to fuck for hours just to get off, there will be no second time. Maybe I am a "boring vanilla" but if its more than 20-30 minutes, I will start to hurt.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/20 04:08 PM
37

Men are visually dumb. I am always STUMPED when a man tells me who he finds attractive. There is such thing as having poor mental faculties/facial recognition cognition. I think a lot of men have that. They see signifiers such as thin, big boobs, blonde hair, and their lizard brains are activated. I know some truly beautiful women who are not recognized by men. I notice things like classic beauty. I believe I am one of those myself--WOMEN mostly think I am beautiful, not men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/20 05:08 PM
5

OMG, so many LVM have come from the shadows in the past few weeks like nosferatu.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/20 04:43 PM
16

I am a fat/overweight woman, and I have found fat men attractive in the past - I had an ex from almost 10 years ago who was a big, tall, fat dude, but he wore it well and was very sexy to me. Since then I've given more fat dudes a chance, and THEY WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH ME. Ironically enough, it's the young, ripped studs who are interested in me. Fat dudes are too insecure to date another fattie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/20 04:41 PM
5

Pornsickness. If a guy isn't regularly consuming porn or looking at IG thots, he will find a VAST MAJORITY of women attractive. If he scrolls through Tinder and thinks "ho hum" it's because porn has hijacked his brain into thinking those women are in his league.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/20 05:00 PM
2

Both of my parents are low value. I love them, but they big time fuckered me up. They never said they loved me, that I was worthy, or even cared to pay attention to anything about me. I was encouraged to be invisible. My dad was a great bread winner, but I see him more as a big brother than a father. This is why, until I was 38, I always dated much older men. My ex, who was 17 years older than me (which puts him at 56 right now, he was 50 when I met him), is someone I regard fondly, like a paren…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/03/20 06:39 PM
2

Yeah that'd be interesting for sure! My FWB fell into my lap by accident. I definitely tried to find one for at least 6 months before I met him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/20 08:23 PM
2

It IS hard to find a good FWB. I went on Tinder last year JUST looking for a FWB and most men didn't even want to commit to THAT! A lot just want a plate to add to their collection so that they feel like a stud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/20 07:59 PM
12

I am right there with you. I make good money, don't want kids, and I don't want to get married. I will ride the cock carousel until I am 75.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/20 06:26 PM
1

I have hashimoto's, PCOS, endometriosis and ADHD. Of all of these, the men I've dated mostly seemed concerned about the hashimoto's but in truth the one that has been detrimental to my life the most has been the latter one - ADHD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 06:05 PM
4

My #1 woman crush of the 90s. She's so insanely hot in "Indecent Proposal" but I have to say this doesn't even resemble that woman :|
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/20 04:45 PM
1

that's awesome. let me know if you ever need a beta read... I've done a few consults with other authors before on developmental editing (for free, of course)!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 11:12 PM
31

I am glad she decided to stop wearing the blue contacts
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 10:19 PM
62

this is Patrick Bateman American Psycho shit. In the book he always refers to his secretary as; "Jean, my secretary, who is in love with me and who I will probably marry someday"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 08:27 PM
2

I've written one book - a romantic comedy. it's kind of quirky, offbeat. still need to get out book #2 but no inspiration has struck me :( how about you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 07:13 PM
2

Hello Queen! Fellow novelist here!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 04:55 PM
4

+ I paid off my student loans a few weeks ago + I've been going to therapy consistently for the past 4 months + I remodeled and renovated my bathroom (well, paid someone to do it) + I consolidated my CC debt into one 0% APR credit card (18 months 0%) so that by 2021 I can be debt-free + I made a dermatologist appt so I can get a mole check and get an RX for Retin-A (seriously, have been dragging my feet on this for YEARS) + I made a list of healthy habits and/or activities to turn to instead of …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 04:52 PM
4

I've said it before and I'll say it again - men cannot PROCESS long blocks of text. Period. They see a wall of text and panic and shut down. Just don't do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 04:45 PM
13

Oh yeah, most men think they are legendary. I've been SO bored on so many dates in my past. One guy rattled on about the important spreadsheet reviewing he needs to do at work - and I think I even stifled a few yawns, yet he prattled on.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/20 03:48 PM
7

In the case of my former FWB, he 100% took me for granted and until I disappeared, he didn't realize how much I was supporting him. Like, I helped this motherf@cker SO much. I helped him move to a 3rd story apartment with no elevator, I loaned him countless money, I let him live with me for a little while, I bought him groceries, took him to concerts, dinners, events - GOD, what a CLOWN I was. Be glad this dead weight is out of your life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/20 07:44 PM
9

This is almost the exact same situation as my FWB I described above. I mean, in my situation unfortunately I was his plaything for a year - I gave him 100% of my emotional labor, and I was "in love" with him. Then, I went on a trip to Europe alone and while I was gone I realized I was fucking myself over. So when I got back, I just stopped seeing him like that. Like, we were still "friendly" but I stopped being his "rock". Fast forward a year later, we were out hanging out in a group setting, an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/20 05:33 PM
17

He will be back and singing the relationship song. Been there. Had a FWB whom I left in the dust about 8 years ago, but remained friendly with. A year later, he was professing undying love and begging me to be in a relationship with him. DON'T DO IT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/20 04:47 PM
11

Damn this sounds like my ex, too. Mommy issues galore. Only likes much older women because they will baby him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/02/20 04:45 PM
5

I am 39 and still have a 19th century romance brain. I channel that fantasy into writing romance novels and keep my head on straight for the real world.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 10:32 PM
16

I keep swiping, swiping, and swiping just looking for someone INTERESTING for christ's sake. I am a novelist, I was in both a punk and polka band in my 20's, I play saxophone, I draw a comics series, I love local women's wrestling, I am involved in the goth music scene, AND I have my shit together (home owner, professional), and NO ONE is on my level.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 10:27 PM
15

I just think at this point, I am very experienced (I am 39) and am also extremely detached so I can be in a situation but also at the same time totally compartmentalize it. Men are still wasting my time at this age, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 10:15 PM
15

So, what is dark triad exactly? Reading this made me realize I might be one, too. I totally see through most guys and just go along for show.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 08:26 PM
4

No, he is not an academic and he's actually a total alcohol grifter. :|
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 07:49 PM
9

you aint wrong
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 06:15 PM
2

I know a college professor (with a PhD, of course) who is engaged to a dishwasher at a pizza restaurant. :|
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/02/20 06:10 PM
19

I don't really believe most men when they say they had an abusive ex
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 10:26 PM
9

ugh, sorry. I am just overly sensitive to the Narcissist diagnosis lately because so many people are quick to use it, it seems. I dated an actual, legit Narcissist--as in diagnosed and had the paperwork to prove it. What was weird is he actually wasn't half as bad as other guys I'd dated who I suspect also had NPD. Don't get me wrong, he was a TRAINWRECK, and we only dated a month, but we've remained friends and I see that he just needs constant validation and attention or he feels empty inside,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 10:24 PM
10

what you described sounds just like an asshole, not a narcissist. How did you come to the conclusion he was a narc?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 10:06 PM
5

They had NO shame about it and acted shocked when I didn't want to sleep with them again. I did give the first guy a second chance because I thought maybe it was nerves, then the second chance he did it AGAIN. He still texts me all the time even though I never respond.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 08:32 PM
7

If it's your desire, do it, but I almost got fillers and Botox this month and then realized I could invest that money instead, or save for the future. Like, are procedures like that actually worth it? I mean, SURE, they are "worth it" - but is "being pretty" really that important?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 07:12 PM
7

In 2019, I slept with 4 men, all of whom lasted a few seconds, tops.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 07:07 PM
18

I live in the city I've been in for 17 years, I own a home here, and I am a local who knows "the good stuff" - so, yeah. I also find it a turn off when a guy has lived in 17 different places. Why you running away, child?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/02/20 12:08 AM
41

I feel this post. I live in a city where there are a ton of transplants, and I am tired of playing tour guide. One guy would constantly blow up my phone as if I were his own personal Google assistant asking me about like, a good dentist or where to get a couch.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 11:56 PM
25

I CANNOT with JESSICA I thought the same thing about Amber, too - total pickmesha I would marry Cameron right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/20 08:36 PM
16

Nah, no response is a response
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 10:23 PM
4

Some porn defender really loves going through this sub and finding people to message! Apparently I am the one with the problem and I have "boring, vanilla tastes" because I don't enjoy anal, choking, squirting or face fucking--and that the MAJORITY of women like those things.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 09:37 PM
9

I wish I could rescue these kids from their awful parents. It rips my heart apart.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 09:34 PM
41

It's called 'mirroring' - some psychos do it, but then some people do it unconsciously. I pick up on other people's sayings and nuances but I am definitely not doing it on purpose.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 09:33 PM
1

They are skeptical of it in the U.S., too. I get told it's made up all the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 08:59 PM
4

idk, my last relationship was with a man who was 17 years older than me (he was 50 when we met, I was 33), and he had an insanely high libido and always was great in bed. I haven't seen ED correlate with age yet, personally. My first boyfriend when I was 19 had dick troubles. ED knows NO AGE!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 05:18 PM
7

She's not everyone's cup of tea, but Kate Bush is a brilliant songwriter and musician. She is such a gifted storyteller through song. And while she does sing about love and relationships at times, they aren't trite and silly (like in "Running up that Hill," which is about being able to understand your partner). But I prefer her work from "The Dreaming" which is really versatile, and so many of the songs tell beautiful stories from "Pull out the Pin" (about the Vietnam war), to "Get out of my Hou…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 04:51 PM
12

I am heteroflexible, and I have been on a few dates with women. What really stood out to me was how much effort these women put into just our first dates. They all were dressed to the 9s, had clearly taken great care in their appearance and had carefully curated several conversation topics. It really was like nothing I'd ever experienced. I did like one of the women, but she was in a poly relationship with a man, and was a mom, and a business owner, and it just seemed like she had no time to act…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 04:15 PM
7

has porn fried men's brains?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 04:08 PM
71

If a guy mentions choking, face fucking, anal or squirting its a dead giveaway.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 04:07 PM
4

But if it bothered him that she didn't want to be exclusive, he'd want to change it. But he's going with the status quo. There's a lot of unknowns here, too. Is this guy getting wifey shit? Is this a full blown relationship without the label? Its really hard to go back after the status quo has been established.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 12:11 AM
20

I know average and below average women who employ FDS tactics and demand great treatment from men (and get it), and HOT babes who do pickme shit for losers. There is no correlation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/02/20 12:10 AM
37

I know gorgeous women who do pickme shit all the time, but it depends on her upbringing. If she was a coddled, popular cheerleader type - less so. If she was more the 'ugly duckling glow up" variety, way more likely to be a pickme.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 11:56 PM
21

In general, I am a people pleaser and lean toward codependency because I grew up neglected, simple as that. I just wanted to be loved (still do), and felt I had to earn and perform for love.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 11:44 PM
25

My dad said to me, one morning when I was 7 or 8, after he'd picked up a dozen donuts and I reached for one: "Even fat boys don't like fat girls"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 11:42 PM
10

If he isn't begging for you to be exclusive it's not on his mind Are you dating others?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 11:27 PM
26

I have a friend like this. We met because I was dating a LVM (this was 9 years ago), and found out he was also dating her. Since we both had been led to believe we were the only ones, I dumped his ass and reached out to her to warn her about the guy. Her and I became friends, and she briefly ceased seeing the dude, but eventually resumed her relationship with him and even saw him off and on for the next 6 years, and has been his sidechick on multiple occasions. Then, she dated Matt the methhead.…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 08:55 PM
30

You're a good friend. But beware - this type rarely lasts long without crumbs of male attention. I tried to help a friend out who had similar rock bottom standards, and it ended up severely damaging our friendship because she decided I was the enemy and not her "boyfriend" (who I found out had multiple other "girlfriends," and had also knocked up another woman). Some people prefer to live in delusion.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 08:50 PM
13

I don't believe men have the same self preservation motivations as women. Maybe because we are responsible for bearing the children and looking after the next generation, or something, idk, but in general it seems men are totally FINE being disposable, which baffles me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 06:20 PM
22

Sadly, the few times I have disclosed, some had the audacity to ask me for some of my Adderall. It's definitely a sucky condition to have, I wasn't diagnosed until 6 months ago at 39. My entire life has been a struggle and I knew something was wrong with me, but I just didn't know WHAT. Even worse, I am seemingly only attracted to others who aren't neurotypical as "normal" people seem very boring to me :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 06:16 PM
75

Even though I have ADHD, I wouldn't date someone else who has it--especially a man. I am a very high functioning ADHD and I've learned tons of coping skills over the years, but the men I know with ADHD still live like trash toddlers and struggle to keep a job. However, when is the time to disclose this stuff in general? I have multiple health issues and ADHD, I generally don't tell people until I've hung out with them 3 or 4 times.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/20 05:38 PM
4

We are looked down on if we are single. I have been single for 17 years, and I get serious looks of bewilderment when I report that to people. The first insult someone will sling at you if you are single is a reminder that you don't have a man. I knew from the time I was 23 (I am now 39) that men only bring me down. That's why I am single.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 05:40 PM
17

A friend of mine's husband stays at home. He does a terrible job. Another friends' husband stayed at home... and cheated on her with a chick he met at toys r us. He ended up getting arrested for child abuse because the side chick brought over her kid to their house and he like--smacked the kid!? FRIEND IS STILL WITH HIM, and has even had 2 more kids with him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/02/20 05:07 PM
9

I can share my story. When I was 21 I met a man online in the UK (I am in the US). We bonded immediately over a shared obsession with a band (think how people travel around to see Phish, same deal - not the same band). After two years of long distance, I relocated to the UK on a student visa (grad school) to be with him. I got over 20,000 in student loans, sold EVERY belonging (car, all furniture, everything), and moved there. The moment I arrived in the UK I could tell he had completely changed…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/02/20 08:19 PM
11

I successfully helped keep my friend from moving in with a LVM fuckboy who just wanted to use her, but all she did was move on to choose even worse guys and now she's saddled with twins from one who won't even claim the kids as his own. Can't say I tried. SIGH.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 11:15 PM
18

Hahahah, SAME.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 11:13 PM
4

Sometimes it works for me, but I am a special case. First, I am older and been through this enough to be able to compartmentalize. Also, my FWB right now is someone I tried dating and couldn't consider as a serious option, so we downgraded things to casual/FWB only. I like him as a person, the sex is great, but he has WAY too many LVM traits for me to ever take as a serious boyfriend option. I'm also working on my career and weight loss right now. Now, if someone I COULD take seriously comes alo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 06:39 PM
30

Every guy I know who is a JP fanboy seems to cherry pick his advice, and can't even follow his most basic tenet of cleaning your damn room.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/02/20 05:18 PM
22

EVERY guy on Hinge invites me to start the chat. It is the ultimate DISS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 11:00 PM
4

She-Devil is the ULTIMATE
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/02/20 07:15 PM
37

I was on Tinder and OkCupid from November until last week, and I did not receive a single viable match. It's become worse than ever, and I finally don't see the use in continuing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 09:04 PM
9

Back when I regularly used Fetlife, I actually met more men on there than I did on the dating apps. And yes, they turned out to be awful LVM who wasted my time - of course.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 03:05 PM
9

HOW do men think that women just spawn children on their own?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 02:54 PM
15

This was a video by Sheraseven on Youtube, and she also goes as far for women to discuss their dream husband as if it ISN'T your boyfriend, like, "My husband" as if it is some guy she hasn't met yet. It's essentially reverse psychology. Note: if a guy is a LVM this won't work. He'll just decide he's not fit for the job and bounce, or continue to waste your time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/02/20 02:42 PM
12

I looked much better in my 30s than in my 20s. Even better, though, is the wisdom you gain, the life experiences, the friendships, and learning to not to take too much TOO seriously.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 10:26 PM
102

can he get her a fill on her nails ffs?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 10:23 PM
4

I am FB friends with a very vocal polyamorous guy, and about a year ago he was always posting pics of his wife with their unicorn. Guess who he kicked to the curb a few months in? His wife, duh. Now he's with his unicorn and still posting all the time about how they want a third. The unicorn is an obvious pickmesha who does everything she wants, including letting him post NSFW pics of her online.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 06:35 PM
33

I have literally never met a man who got played by a gold digger, yet I know MANY women who have had men sponge off of them and use them. Like, almost every woman I know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/02/20 04:45 PM
6

They made everyone look the same, totally stripped anyone of any individual style. Now, some people had such tragic style that it was an upgrade, but I think everyone should try to find a unique style that works for them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 09:35 PM
6

As someone who grew up with a mother who only knew how to show she loved me by cleaning my room, Acts of Service is #1 for me, with gifts second. :D
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 06:51 PM
14

This list reminds me of all the bland makeovers Stacy and Clinton did to women on "What not to Wear" in the 2000's.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 05:59 PM
6

Also in Denver. It's a minefield of douche. The women are awesome, though!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 04:25 PM
5

This sounds like Denver, too.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/01/20 04:24 PM
7

guh. this is just tooooo relatable. this is like, my entire love life, and childhood, both.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 09:17 PM
29

Anytime a man sees a wall of text from a woman, he panics
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 08:52 PM
7

You can do better than this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 08:52 PM
24

I had a boyfriend when i was 18 who did this (I am now 39). I dumped him after the second time he "fell asleep".
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/01/20 08:49 PM
22

Shera7 has a video on this. She says to talk about your husband as if it's not the guy you're dating. "When I meet my husband," "When I get married, I want this kind of wedding..." He'll figure out that you're not envisioning him as your husband and want to fix that, is apparently the thinking. Reverse psychology.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 11:32 PM
2

Oh, I had a few dudes like that, but they weren't available as often as I needed them. God, I am so glad I got that resolved... way too much energy spent on pursuing dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 06:58 PM
6

Metformin and spiro :) I also quit getting acupuncture. It was making me hornier. Rampant testosterone was making me as horny as a man. I was doing shady male shit like swiping on Tinder with reckless abandon and having NSA hook ups with dudes from kik, etc.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 06:47 PM
9

so, I have PCOS, the hallmark of which is high testosterone for a woman. In the past, I have related to men because the horniness has been UN...BEAR...ABLE. I remember a few years back I was on a work trip to Florida, and I was furiously swiping on Tinder, and even though all the dudes I matched with were thirsty AF, the stars just couldn't align and no one could meet up with me. And the urge, the frustration, was just so real, I thought I might explode. Thankfully I am now on medication that's …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/01/20 05:23 PM
2

lol! despite my bummer rant, I have a great life, and it's not that I don't have fun with guys, I just don't take them seriously nor hang my fate on meeting a HVM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/20 09:56 PM
30

I don't want to make anyone bummed out, but I have not found a man who wants to commit to me, nor have I found anyone that I am that interested in, in over 16 years. My last relationship was with a narcissist who I moved to another country to be with. As soon as I moved in with him, he let the mask slip. I have a lot of trauma from that, and my shitty childhood, and I think I am unfortunately only attracted to toxic men. So, I've basically given up for now, until I've spent a few more years in t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/01/20 07:58 PM
1

I am able to compartmentalize sex and have had a few short term flings that were great.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 09:23 PM
3

Lauren Bacall, Joan Crawford, Elizabeth Taylor, Marlene Dietrich, Faye Dunaway, Cher, Sigourney Weaver
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 09:22 PM
9

Just walk away. I did the same thing 18 months ago. Only stayed in a 5 year relationship for the good sex. I've had tons of great sex since then.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:17 PM
6

Just leave the LVM, or tell him you want to downgrade the relationship to just casual NSA hook ups if all the worth he brings is his dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:14 PM
9

Watch old movies. Things weren't great for women back then, but the stars of the silver screen (not Marilyn, though), were classy, witty, wise-cracking dames.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:09 PM
2

How old are you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 05:08 PM
25

Guys aren't picky about weight. They will fuck almost anything. BUT, they generally want a woman that is perceived as culturally desireable so that their dude bros will give them a high five. Lose weight for yourself, not a guy - losing weight will make you live longer, give you access to better fashion options, make you healthier, give you endurance, make your joints hurt less, make yoga poses easier, and make tying your shoes easier.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 04:42 PM
105

As a woman who is neither the virgin nor the whore to the majority of most men, they literally don't have it in their programming to see me as anything other than that. So, instead, most men start to associate me as another guy just because they aren't capable of seeing a woman as more than their mommy or a sex toy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/01/20 04:21 PM
2

how old are you? give it time. I always liked older men, turned 38 and then the pendulum swung the other way and now I prefer younger guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 08:37 PM
14

Once, with my ex, we were going through a rekindling after a break up and I refused to have sex with him. For six months. He held on... for six months, NO sex. And this was after having regular sex for three years. If a guy is crazy about you, he'll wait.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/01/20 08:08 PM
35

lol omg this larping is... WOW
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 10:07 PM
12

I am considering doing the same thing tbh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 09:42 PM
7

Also, not only an alcoholic, but an IDIOT with money. He could be investing that money. Why would you want to be with someone with such poor judgment?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 06:09 PM
8

Uh, no. This behavior rarely just goes away overnight. He's an alcoholic. I dated one for a while, who was in his 50s and still spending $2k a month on booze. Alcoholics are selfish and need to go to therapy instead of self soothing with alcohol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 06:08 PM
3

Oh yeah, the ol "I'm open to more if it feels right" line. A classic carrot dangler. Nah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 04:43 PM
4

Oh god, it's a terrible story back when I was a HUGE pickmesha. I started casually seeing this guy, and I wasn't even into him that much - he was not a priority, then started playing love games so that I'd get clingy like triangulating, push/pull, intermittent reinforcement, etc. I knew he was not boyfriend material but I became obsessed with him, I am sad to report. We were in the same music scene and when we went to concerts I had to pretend that we weren't dating so that his ex wouldn't get j…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/01/20 04:24 PM
58

Yes, they are visually dumb. It's exactly as you stated. That's why I only take it as a compliment when a woman says I am attractive. They see things like nice skin, beautiful hair, bone structure. Men see a sex doll.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 09:44 PM
21

When men see a text thats over two sentences long they will immediately shut down
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 09:06 PM
27

I responded to a post on DoT maybe over a year ago that asking men for the truth is useless because they'll gaslight you, and a ton of dudes piled on me saying I was misusing the term. If you ask a dude if he's into you, if something is wrong, etc., if they are getting low effort sex they will 100% gaslight the shit out of you and tell you it's all good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 09:06 PM
60

Yep, invite her. Then, see how your BF reacts. Men try to keep women away from each other who have dirt to spill. I had a boyfriend who told me his ex was violent and had stabbed someone just so I wouldn't talk to her. Turned out SHE WASN'T EVEN HIS EX (they were still together), and she was sweet as could be.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 05:26 PM
39

You need to befriend her, too. That'll bust that up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/01/20 05:18 PM
4

Girl, same. I have had plenty of FWBs and situationships with broke guys, but relationships--no. My sister is in a relationship with a broke guy and can never go on vacations with him because he has no money and pays tons of child support. I want to experience the finer things in life. I am not asking for a guy to pay for me, just to keep up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/01/20 09:26 PM
20

And also the biggest deterrent to them being boyfriend material was they were broke. If more men decided to try and level up and actually carve out a career path for themselves they'd have more success with women.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 11:35 PM
31

I am sure they are lining up. When are ugly dudes gonna learn they can't have casual sex?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 11:13 PM
31

Most of the time, a "situationship" happens because the woman isn't sure about the dude, either. I've been there. I've liked a guy enough to hang around him, but to introduce him to friends, family, and make future plans didn't seem right because I didn't see potential. Very rarely have I been gunning to make a situationship my boyfriend.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 11:12 PM
22

ime hot guys are not any more shallow or narcissistic than ugly ones
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 11:08 PM
16

oh my god you are so right. are you new here? valuable new poster!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 11:08 PM
21

I have mixed feelings about Lolita. Lolita was used as a grooming tool for a man to select me as a victim online, way back in the 90s when I was 17. I believe he used it as a test to see if I was a willing victim. I read it and loved it, because I am a writer and loved the style. I am still a writer and an author and Nabokov was a big influence on me. This man was 35 years old, and moved to my city (from across the country), loosened my inhibitions with alcohol, and took my virginity. We "dated"…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 10:50 PM
12

They are used to the love of their mommy, who gave and gave without getting anything in return, and that's the kind of relationship they want again with their future girlfriend/wife.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 05:08 PM
24

I don't think these things are necessarily true, but I DO think men think that they are more likely to be. I've had men get volatile and extremely rude when I rejected them, because I am overweight. They thought just because I am big, that I was going to be easy. Sorry, pal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/01/20 05:00 PM
82

I have experienced the same. I am not even 40 (39, though), and some dude who was 41 years old messaged me and said he loved older women, and loved cougars, and I said... um, I am younger than you, bro.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 06:09 PM
41

A man bought me a convertible once. When we broke up, I sold it back to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/01/20 04:14 PM
5

It's realistic because it's a true story. There's another documentary on him on Oxygen, he was truly an evil monster.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/01/20 05:09 PM
21

Don't feel sorry for these sponges. I did this to a guy and he was living with someone else the next day. SOFT PIMPS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 04:58 PM
7

If I match with a guy on Tinder, OkCupid, etc., and they ask if I have snapchat, I immediately unmatch with them. They are just looking to get free nudes for their masturbation sessions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/01/20 04:20 PM
35

I wouldn't date anyone with a snapchat.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 11:14 PM
6

I am 39, and have technically been single for 16 years, so, you can imagine, my number is quite high and I am an enormous slut according to this site. Shrug emoji.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 08:53 PM
6

this post is from a DOM. I am literally laughing over here.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/01/20 08:49 PM
36

were you on the verge of leaving him, and he whipped this out a week later?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 09:48 PM
4

don't high society jetsetters fly PJ? a friend of mine works at the small, regional airport where the charter jets and private jets take off, and she definitely meets lots of rich people, but at the regular ol' airport for us plebs, it's pretty slim pickens when it comes to anyone 'high society' You'll have to pry my black wardrobe from my cold, dead hands.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 08:28 PM
17

The takeaway from the entire channel is in order to be classy, also be white, blonde, and wear a lot of white with delicate jewelry, drape a lot of camel-colored sweaters or wool coats over your shoulders, wear cashmere turtle necks, big sunglasses. I mean, I COULD go for these looks but I actually like expressing myself through fashion, and sorry, I am an all-black attired artsy bitch forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 06:22 PM
10

I watch her channel, she has some good advice on how to seem classy and elegant, but that's it, in my view.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/01/20 06:17 PM
4

CORRECTION - he's meant to be deplorable and pathetic in the FIRST book. The second book was pure garbage and felt sympathetic to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:54 PM
13

I found his voice to be obviously satirical and hyperbolic, similar to Patrick Bateman from "American Psycho," or Humbert Humbert in "Lolita" and almost none of that came through in the show and anyone who missed that in the books isn't a very skilled reader. He's meant to be deplorable and pathetic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:53 PM
29

Yep, it's their latest cute attempt to get low effort sex. I block immediately if anyone mentions cuddling.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:51 PM
4

does this guy have like a 12"-er or something? how does he get hot chicks consistently?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:36 PM
31

Ugly guys need to wake tf up, because if a woman wants casual ONLY, we can literally get a hot ripped dude with a big dick in a manner of minutes on Tinder. That's why the more average or unattractive guys PRETEND they want a relationship, whereas the actual hot guys will be straight up about what they are looking for.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:30 PM
14

I am disturbed by this, too. I read both the books and was alarmed by how many women on the Goodreads pages were swooning over Joe. GROSS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:23 PM
49

I feel this post. I also rejoined the apps recently, and I am just fielding dick missiles left and right. Not ONE guy has actually put in any effort to try to even ask me out on a date - there is just endless texting that feels like I am chatting with essentially a golden retriever with an iPhone based on the intelligence and conversation skills on the other end, and even the guys who MIGHT have potential will ask a stupid question that gets them eliminated like asking if I "cuddle". I think tha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/01/20 04:13 PM
18

comedians are some of the saddest people on the planet
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 08:24 PM
10

I've dated two lawyers and they had almost zero conscience
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 08:23 PM
26

It is lunacy!! I got laid off two years ago from my job, and my male friends were BAFFLED why I took myself off the market once I was unemployed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 08:18 PM
14

omg you are so spot on. So many guys on OkCupid like it because they can wax on for 1,000 words about themselves. I swear, so many guys act like they are just LEGENDARY, it's so gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/01/20 06:13 PM
16

My mom had breast cancer 2 years ago, and the first thing my LVM dad did was put up a fuss about her getting a mastectomy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 09:25 PM
21

I am plus size, and also have a "librarian" look. Ugh, the messages I get are barf-tastic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 09:11 PM
7

Such a turn off. I've had guys think I am not responsive after not replying for 30 minutes. Dude, no, I am just busy and living my life. I have NO notifications on my phone. I check apps, messages, and email at my leisure.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 09:09 PM
63

He wants you to be exclusive to HIM but not the other way around. Don't do it. This is becoming what they call a situationship.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/12/19 05:21 PM
18

it refers to "spinning plates" = i.e, sleeping with multiple women. It's a MGTOW/Red Pill term.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 08:46 PM
6

covert incest anyone? gross
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 06:36 PM
3

If you can't afford therapy, read all the books recommended on this sub. Most are available at the library.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 06:34 PM
5

I will give you a free tarot reading. PM me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 06:33 PM
8

Get a job, get out of your mom's apt, focus on you and healing... for a WHILE. Like, a few years. You won't regret it. You're looking for a distraction.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 06:32 PM
42

I dated a guy who was 41 who had never been married, nor had even been in a relationship longer than a year. Yeahhhhh guess who turned out to just be a MGTOWer with a variety of "plates" on call?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/12/19 06:16 PM
2

I had to preach this to my sister, who loves Lush products... I want something that has some ingredients that pack a punch. Not just cute packaging or something that smells nice. Does it perform? If so, I'm in.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 09:30 PM
2

I agree on the scammy moisturizer - "miracle broth" my ass. I went to a beauty event at Neimans a few months back and the La Mer rep put some goop on my chest. When I asked about the ingredients she really couldn't answer me other than the miracle broth crap which means nothing and sounds like it's 100% marketing jargon.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 09:18 PM
3

I only had two samples, so this is based on only two days - but I found it held up very nicely over a 12 hour workday on both days. I am also 39, and think it's catered more to my age group. I used to be a huge Double Wear stan, but then it started making me look dry and crypt-keeper-esque.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 08:52 PM
10

I am very into skincare routines, so reading yours was such a blessing. In fact, that entire post was GOLD. I saved that. Also, I recently tried the La Mer foundation and unfortunately it was... amazing. Way better than Armani. Bye bye, $120.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 08:09 PM
7

yes indeed
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:45 PM
17

This has happened to me MANY times with a "casual" relationship. The dude escalates it, starts being moony, starts wanting to just hang out all the time, starts texting you non-stop. Then, you reciprocate, and he goes cold almost immediately. Its like they get some sick amusement out of controlling your emotions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:37 PM
15

I would much rather have a daughter than worry about my son being a school shooter, pedophile, or rapist. NONE of that would cross my mind with a daughter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:33 PM
17

My coworker went to mini golf and olive garden for his bachelor party. They are out there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:24 PM
28

I just hunted down your skincare post, and I think I may have been convinced to get SK-II finally
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:10 PM
1

I would avoid. How will you feel when this HVM decides he wants to enter the dating market again and that doesn't include you? Having a HVM deem you FWB material only is pretty much an insult. FWB RARELY works. I always expect my own situation to implode at any moment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 05:03 PM
3

Hmm this is tricky, because it sounds to me like you consider him dating material. I have a FWB, and while he is a smokeshow and amazing in bed, he is such a LVM in his lifestyle and history that I could never consider dating him, so it massively helps keep my emotions in check.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/12/19 04:56 PM
16

No arguing here, I think you're totally right. I've had men actually respect me (for the most part) before, and I think it's because I didn't fit into either a mommy or whore paradigm for them, and their faulty programming couldn't handle it so they began to see me as another man. Men do not know WHAT TO DO with a woman who isn't a virgin or whore in their eyes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 11:39 PM
17

This only happened to me when I dated a guy with a foot fetish. He didn't want to have intercourse, but just wanted to suck my toes - it was better than sex to him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 11:34 PM
24

Yeah, in my experience, ugly dudes are just as annoying and frustrating, at least the hot ones are hot enough to not have to pretend they're gonna be your boyfriend and instead just plate you. The hot guy I am FWB with has so many women throwing themselves at him that he doesn't even care anymore, whereas these uggos have a MEGA complex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 08:50 PM
44

former side chick, YES, they lie to you, maybe less about the big stuff because they aren't married to you, but all in all, 100%. Will never do it again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/12/19 08:48 PM
9

Tell your boss you are available to cover shifts or can work OT. I stay really pretty busy between work, gym, family, friends, etc. One thing that developed out of boredom when I was a teenager was writing. I am a bit older (39), so I grew up without social media and the internet. During the summer when I was bored, I started writing short stories. Then, that continued... now I am a published author. Writing is free and takes almost no upfront investment.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 08:11 PM
-3

Get a job. Sorry to be rude, but if you need help being busy and are broke, may as well make money while you're at it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 07:31 PM
30

You are still young. It's not too late. If you hadn't met this guy, you'd have a bachelors degree and midlevel in a career path. The best time to do something was 10 years ago, the second best time is TODAY. This guy is holding you up because you are his second mommy. - Kick him to the curb - Stay living with parents to save money, get your bachelors, and level up - Re-enter the dating scene at 30 a Queen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 07:25 PM
21

Great great post. I am also someone who has lots of experiences with narcs (in fact, I think more narcs than NON). One thing I consistently noticed is that a Narcissist will consistently press on your boundaries. You will feel yourself WANTING to assert them, but in my past, I felt like I had to comply in order to keep their interest. If you feel your boundaries crumbling, it's because someone is trying to knock them down. I actually think I have very solid boundaries and I'm very stand-offish, …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 05:43 PM
1

He is seriously a dangerous psychopath.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 05:35 PM
51

Think about how much you'd accomplish if you didn't have to worry about this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/12/19 05:34 PM
11

Every hairy guy I've been with has been pretty clean. It's actually like a borderline fetish for me, I can't find a guy attractive if he isn't hairy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/19 10:44 PM
15

for the love of god, FLOSS.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/19 04:47 PM
9

i hateeee shaved down to the skin pubic area. ugh, so gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/19 04:47 PM
10

I am a freak who loves hairy hairy body hair (chest, arms, back, legs, stomach, etc), so when a guy trims or god forbid, SHAVES his chest, I am very bummed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/12/19 04:44 PM
23

Both of my parents grew up in dysfunctional, impoverished families with abuse and neglect, so I know they are just working from the best toolkit they have, but damn, they done fucked me up good.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/19 08:18 PM
59

You're lucky. I have a LVM for a father, who does nothing and is essentially a child at 72.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/12/19 08:11 PM
11

I am in a health conscious state, and blessed to be surrounded by lean, muscular dudes - even the older ones.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/19 08:44 PM
28

I am 39, and recently have become the type that people BALK at my license and do a double take because I look maybe 26 or 27 and also regularly get confused for a college student. Thanks, sunscreen!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/19 08:44 PM
7

How old are you? If you are in highschool or college, I'd say focus on self improvement and leveling up and forget this guy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/12/19 08:36 PM
16

Me neither. Every guy I know follows tons of instagram thots and I do not understand. I don't NEED to see eye candy all the live long day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/19 10:52 PM
5

Or just say, "I'm really close to my aunt and uncle. He's a cop, so he likes to check in on me a lot." Low value males and scammers will scatter.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/19 10:38 PM
7

Have you watched Dirty John? There's one episode where it shows what a slime he is, trying to scam women online. And he has a GREAT first date with a woman, who then reveals her older brothers are both cops... to which he nopes out after that. Soooo make up a cop cousin, or something.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/19 08:52 PM
14

This is timely, as my much older ex (who I was with for 5 years) is suddenly wanting me back and hinting at marriage. I am 39, and he's now 56. I can't help but think of the practical shit like having to be with someone who is nearing 60, and how he has hardly any assets or retirement savings, and is a stage 4 cancer survivor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/19 05:31 PM
3

I have done this to dudes. The whole "You'll do for now," mentality.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/12/19 05:20 PM
11

Oh hell no. If I get ANY wishy-washy answers, non-commital responses, it's moving on time. The guys I've hit it off with the most were planners who asked well in advance, confirmed in advance, and were prompt and on time. I appreciate those qualities. If someone wants to "go with the flow" its because they think they have better options. If anyone pulls this with me I just make other plans.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/19 08:57 PM
26

My life BEGAN at 31. I was such a late bloomer. I spent my 20's depressed, isolated, and a workaholic with low self esteem. Finally, at 31 I came alive. It's been the best decade of my life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/19 08:55 PM
20

It's normal. The irony of your 20's is that you take it way too seriously. "Youth is wasted on the young" - my 30's have been a blast, whereas I spent my 20's just coping with not being a child anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/19 08:54 PM
8

This hasn't happened to me since the days of AOL because I've found no man is interesting enough to catch my attention with just his lazy ass text messages.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/19 08:47 PM
1

He is not, sadly... he's practically a full-on grifter like the guy in "Dirty John"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/12/19 04:06 PM
2

yup, very true. my FWB looks super hot with a beard, and WAY too young without one...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 10:56 PM
1

I know a woman who is a professor at a major university with her PhD (clearly), and her boyfriend is... a dishwasher at a pizza joint. :|
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 10:44 PM
1

A few years ago I was laid off from my job. I had drinks with a male friend shortly thereafter and he asked me if I was still on the dating apps. I said no, and he acted confused. I said "I am unemployed. I don't bring much to the table right now. And I have a HUGE effort ahead of me. Why would I distract myself?" This guy was straight up BEWILDERED at the concept of not dating when you haven't much to offer.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 10:43 PM
15

ngl, if a guy is hot, the beard looks good. But somehow a bunch of average assholes decided that a beard was going to make them a stud, and uhhh, no.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 10:21 PM
18

LOL! No. This is all lies. I know super hot, like, VERY hot dudes who can't get laid like this. This is a fantasy. Cool fanfiction!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 10:15 PM
22

These comments make me wanna vom
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/12/19 07:36 PM
9

Oh yeah, I agree - AVOID anxious.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:52 PM
6

Denver
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:52 PM
4

Yeah, I could see that. However, my ex of 5 years was an anxious mess and had an 8" so there are exceptions to the rule.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:36 PM
2

Yep, I've had that happen, too. Like "Do you give head?" and stuff like that. It's DISTURBING.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:32 PM
21

I'm in a very popular city for millennials (I think #1 in the country?) and it's full of hot, fit dudes and it's wonderful. I am average as can be, but am not hurting for attention from hot guys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:20 PM
23

It does matter. I like that with some length, there can be more variation of positions. Some just do NOT work with a small dick. I think in the realm of 6-8" is best for me. I've been blessed to have been with a lot of eight inchers.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:18 PM
11

spill the tea on this behavior pls!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:15 PM
39

ding ding ding. Hot dudes are hard to come by. If a guy is fugly, it's a lot easier to let his ass go.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/12/19 05:12 PM
3

Not always. I dated a guy who definitely treated his dog better than he treated me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/19 07:50 PM
1

Shallon Lester talks a lot about how any one person can only fulfill 80% of your needs, so people use the side piece to fill that other 20%. That 20% is usually a bit of "strange," which is why the side chick is usually a weird downgrade.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/12/19 04:27 PM
5

I'll be upfront here: I used to see a married guy, so I know their MO. They have the public-facing wife who is essentially a trophy. You were a trophy girlfriend. The girl on the side is the one who ticks a few boxes, but doesn't fit their image. In my case, the married guy I saw was a "family man" and I was a single goth chick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/19 11:53 PM
18

please tell us how to hurt a narcissist, because I am curious!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/19 11:42 PM
5

I had one like that. We actually "dated" for an entire year. When things move so slow and stagnate, then start again, it's easy for it to go on wayyyyy too long. My last text from him said, "How's life in the fast lane?" to which I did not reply. That was 4 months ago.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/19 09:14 PM
6

I consider bread crumbing tossing back replies and texts once in a while just to keep you on the line enough so that you don't bounce completely
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/12/19 05:58 PM
25

Instead of leveling up in order to support themselves and be independent, they use a woman's heart to have a place to live. I've known way too many hobosexuals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/11/19 05:56 PM
5

Tell him, "You know, I've had a change of heart. I'd prefer to get a meal out. I really don't feel comfortable having someone over for something as intimate as cooking a meal together this soon."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 05:19 PM
10

HAHAHAH. This is great. Sorry, but REAL alpha chads don't even read reddit, let alone post regularly. I told my FWB about incels/red pill and he had no idea what it was - he's a mega stud and has a body count well over 100, definitely the kind of guy women sleep with while they're looking for Mr. Right (like me).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 05:12 PM
27

This has happened to me EVERY time I bring up my feelings being hurt or being disappointed. It turns into a free therapist session for the dude. Ugh.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 04:47 PM
60

At lease she's recognized that this is extremely fucked up.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 04:39 PM
13

It's real but it does not happen during an orgasm nor does it necessarily even mean it feels amazing.. it's just force in one specific area for me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 02:40 AM
23

I recently joined Tinder again and lamented to my sister that every guy seems to think he is LEGENDARY. Like, c'mon, Bruce, you ARE NOT A PROTAGONIST IN A FILM.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/11/19 02:22 AM
9

You are such a star! Don't listen to your mom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:19 PM
26

That's what I want to know. It's really a sign that the guy hasn't been laid in a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG TIME because he's just THAT impatient. Every stud I've had sex with never, ever, ever mentioned sex prior to the act taking place.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:18 PM
9

It's a sixth sense, because I can really sniff out a freak, too. On the male side, it's just a confidence thing... although the super hot French guy I hooked up with last year had the confidence/swagger, and he SUCKED in bed.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:17 PM
11

My FWB and I hung out last week, and he said that I gave off "Freak" vibes on Tinder when we met (over 6 months ago). He said it was in my smile. Ugh, I wish I could erase it tbh, tiiiiired of fuck boys.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:11 PM
10

This is a great post!!! Apparently, though, I give off "freak" vibes and it's never done me many favors.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:10 PM
46

This is a quality post. Every guy I've had GREAT sex with did NOT brag about what an amazing lay he was, ALSO never sent a dick pic.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 11:09 PM
22

most men are like this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/11/19 10:55 PM
15

Don't do a LDR of such magnitude, been there, done that, have the t-shirt, have the trauma and pain still from the fallout, plus still paying off my student loans from moving across the world to go to graduate school in another country
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/11/19 10:39 PM
13

There's a couple. But, sadly, I can't even say my own father is high value. I had a friend who used to exemplify the ultimate high value male to me. Then I found out that even he was cheating on his wife. God, that was a rough day when I found that out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/19 08:47 PM
13

I escaped a narcissist when I was 23. He lured me to another country and I pretty much became his live-in maid, chef, and sex toy with NO benefits for me (on top of that was emotional abuse to boot). After that, I took NO shit. And as a result, I was pretty much 100% single for 8 years. Then, in my 30's, I slipped. For wayyyyy too long.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/19 08:36 PM
23

This is going to age me, but I am a big Duran Duran fan. In the 80s they were consistently dismissed as drivel because their fan base was largely female (due to every member being a stone cold fox), and objectively speaking, they are INCREDIBLE musicians and their music has definitely stood the test of time. But, hey, its girl music, how good could it be?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/19 03:49 PM
11

And a "boyfriend" was also for teenagers, hence 'boy'
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/19 03:31 PM
34

Talk to older people, watch old movies. Whenever I watch old movies I am struck by how even though a female character will have a 'boyfriend,' she still will go on dates. And my parents, while they 'dated' long distance for a year, my mother dated many other guys until my dad wised up and finally locked her down.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/11/19 04:17 AM
111

Back in the 50's, 60's, 70's, until a man locked you down with a proposal, you were SINGLE, and free to date whomever you wanted. This whole thing with a 'boyfriend' being a monogamous commitment is relatively new. I'd say since the 90's.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 11:49 PM
8

I have a lot of issues with codependency due to shitty parenting growing up, and while I didn't understand it then, I now realize that I was seeking out a parental figure when I was dating much older men (biggest age difference was 17 years). My ex who is 17 years older than me is, in my head, the person I pine for when I am sick, sad, and lonely, much like someone yearns for their mommy. This can only be fixed in THERAPY.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:57 PM
14

There is a certain type of guy who is obsessed with me, too - usually "indie" guys who are into vinyl, comic books, obscure shit. They feel completely entitled to a "cool" girlfriend and do NOT understand why I am not into them. My type is athletic, smart in a practical/pragmatic way, and sort of old-fashioned/very masculine.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:52 PM
5

You over-corrected. I understand. I am working on the same thing. I didn't realize that I gave off intense sexual vibes for a looooong time. Even my Tinder profile, which I thought was benign, apparently seemed very overtly sexual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:43 PM
7

Men pretty much leave it up to the woman if a second date is in the cards. They are so averse to rejection, they won't ask for a second date unless its been EXPLICITLY stated that one is desired. *EVEN if THEY* want a second date, they are SO scared if you say no that they won't ask unless you give them a very, very clear signal.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:20 PM
3

See my comment above.. I think it's because if your energy is diverted in a way that isn't focused on "landing him," you seem aloof and uninterested and therefore he does feel like he has to chase you. It is not FDS, though, so I am not sure I recommend this approach.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:15 PM
7

The only way I've been in relationships is through this method. BUT, what it comes down to is your energy - when you come at it from a sexual place and NO emotional attachment, it drives them nuts that you aren't pining for them and making them a priority. I was in a 5 year relationship with a guy who I'd designated as a slam piece only, then 3 months into our arrangement he dropped the L bomb on me. So, I think you can apply FDS without the sex part, since it's mostly about your energy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 05:13 PM
16

There have been a few times in my life where I decided to just not text first, and seriously never heard from the dude again. Shallon Lester talks about "passive reciprocation" and this is what gets women who pursue in a shitty situation - ANY GUY is going to take free pussy thrown his way. My FWB is a super hot 9/10 in looks, but low value in attitude/life, and he gets tons of women texting him first, sliding into his DMs, etc., but he NEVER makes the first move. In fact, he and I got into an a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 12:21 AM
14

I just joined Tinder last night again, and I am already overwhelmed with all the low value men sending me dumb messages. I am INSTANTLY annoyed at how quickly they try to get sexual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/11/19 12:02 AM
40

About a year ago I joined tinder looking JUST for sex/FWB. I swear I only got dudes hitting me up who wanted to actually legitimately date me, whereas if I come at it from the opposite end I only get thirsty guys who just want hook ups.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/19 11:54 PM
3

narcissist
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/19 12:06 AM
2

Just ghost his ass
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/19 12:03 AM
5

I was in a toxic relationship with a narc 15 years ago, and I never understood why everyone in his life kinda low-key hated him, and then when I finally lived with him, I UNDERSTOOD. The sister and baby momma who hate him are huge red flags.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/11/19 12:00 AM
19

In order to have a FWB, you need to go in with your eyes open and remain totally emotionally detached. If anything triggers you to get attached, nix it - things like spending the night, snuggling, etc. I currently have an FWB and while I find myself having moments of fondness for him, he exhibits so many deal breakers that I couldn't possibly commit to him long term, so that helps (he is really just eye candy and only that). Also, he's much younger than me, and I find I don't take young young gu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/19 11:50 PM
12

I really only get much traction on Tinder. On Bumble and Hinge I get NOWHERE. I just have a slut face.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/11/19 11:41 PM
28

This guy used to message me on kik every few weeks with just "Feel like giving head before bed?" and "BJ tonight?" and finally I told him I have no interest in driving across town to be his free prostitute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/19 06:23 PM
24

I think of "dad bod" as a scrawny guy with bird arms and a pot belly. Strongman guys are hot to me because they have muscle--even if it is covered by a layer of fat. And if they are hairy, even better!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/19 06:18 PM
28

A lot of unfit guys think they can win me over by being "cool" and while I hate to be so shallow, I really like fit guys because they can perform better in bed. Sorry, not sorry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/19 06:04 PM
60

I switched to meatheads/fit guys in the last year. Won't go back now. My theory when women say they like dad bods is that they are on birth control pills and can't smell pheromones anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/19 06:00 PM
472

I know women who have kids and their grown children moved away and hardly speak to them. Why does everyone think having kids automatically means you'll have someone to keep you company in your old age?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/11/19 05:10 PM
6

This is amazing. You are such a good parent. I wish my mother had given me ANY guidance at all - she never talked to me about how to deal with guys, other than to STAY AWAY from them (lol, maybe she was right?)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 09:36 PM
29

Never, ever, ever, ever put a man through school - especially med school.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 09:32 PM
21

It's one thing to follow celebrities and rando instagram thots, but local women, NOPE. Nope on outta there.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 09:20 PM
1

wowwwww how low must you be to lie about that. like, why not just go do those things and have it be true?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 09:16 PM
1

got any specific IGs to follow for this?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 05:48 PM
18

I turn 40 in 6 months, and for my birthday I am gifting myself lip injections, tear trough fillers, and forehead botox. Can't wait!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 05:33 PM
4

I have asked men before, "Why do you think the general advice is that if you can't love yourself you can't love others?" and the responses are always... illuminating. To me, the reason you need to love yourself first is if you don't you will always question, doubt, and poke holes in the other person's love for you. You will sabotage that which you do not believe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 04:52 PM
24

Hoe-ish behavior on both sides speaks to a larger problem, usually lack of self worth. Most people feel the need to be promiscuous to get validation, NOT for sexual gratification (because if it was the latter, you really just need to have ONE person you are regularly having sex with). I struggle with this issue myself and am in therapy for it and can give you more insight into why I have been promiscuous in the past if you'd like.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 04:38 PM
4

Yes, being committed to a man MOSTLY benefits them. In my early 20's I was engaged to a man 11 years older than me, and he got a free live-in maid, chef, therapist, AND he sponged money off me AND stopped having sex with me. After that I promised myself, NEVER AGAIN.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/11/19 04:25 PM
1

I know most of these, but what is storytelling?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 11:18 PM
14

as soon as a dude negs me I know who I am dealing with
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 11:16 PM
8

Don't look back
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 11:13 PM
11

the depravity!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 11:07 PM
5

Correction - stay low body fat everywhere but your face.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 09:12 PM
23

Honey I am 39 and got guys in their 20s, 30s, 40s AND 50s wanting to take me out. YOU ARE GOING TO BE FINE. Dusty-ass dudes always go for younger because younger women are more likely to be pickmes. Also, being single is amazing, so don't fear it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 09:09 PM
26

These guys just want to order vagina like they are browsing Postmates. God, it's disgusting.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 09:07 PM
16

yes, when a dude is interesting and can converse and be funny and interesting my radar goes off, too, like, "oh boy, we have a narc here"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 06:21 PM
9

Every low quality man on OLD has a HUGE chip on his shoulder about "bitches" and "feminists" and it's like geez Roger, maybe you're just REALLY lame? NO self reflection, I swear.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 06:08 PM
18

God, dudes are SO boring and even more boring on text, that when you meet a guy who can converse electronically in a way that is engaging and interesting you're like WHAT IS GOING ON HERE
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/11/19 06:02 PM
9

Once a guy called me the most pretentious person he'd ever met... that made me proud.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 09:28 PM
9

I have dated guys who make way less money than me and their lives were a non-stop turnstile of problems and stress due to lack of funds... I decided I no longer want to date someone who is always struggling, because I want to have fun, travel, and experience the finer things in life.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 09:17 PM
19

Reading your texts, I am having flashbacks to my ex I moved to another country to be with... started off as an LDR, and he just assumed that my parents were footing my bill to relocate to the UK (NOPE, I WAS PAYING FOR IT MYSELF), so he sponged off me and ordered me around like I was his maid. I left him one day when he was at work and never spoke to him again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 09:10 PM
12

My last FWB worked construction, and really struggled with the inconsistent hours and schedule in order to live the life he wanted. He would routinely show up to work, and no one else on the team would roll in until 10:30-11, then they'd go dark for weeks at a time with no work. I recall that I asked him--"Uhh, how do your coworkers get by?" He went through each of them, name by name, and ALL of them (all guys) lived at home with their parents still.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 07:29 PM
4

I have only been in toxic relationships. That's all I've known. I minimize my own needs and parent and/or play therapist until I feel exhausted and like I've disappeared, then I cut and run.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 05:11 PM
4

This is a great post. I have these issues.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 04:57 PM
51

I went out with a guy a year ago who bitched right away about how he was tired of buying a woman drinks and then getting ghosted and it was suchhhhhh a turn offfffff.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/11/19 04:29 PM
37

Take care of your skin, focus on your education and yourself. Don't drink, don't smoke, eat nutritious food, and get lots of sleep.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/11/19 03:23 PM
18

The guy you gave a background on sounds a LOT like the guy I just dealt with over the summer. SUPER HOT SMOKE SHOW and immediately went into the sob stories and manipulation and tried to low-key move in with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/19 11:47 PM
14

A friend of mine got knocked up by a guy who lied and said he'd had a vasectomy. Not saying that's the case here, but it is possible for guys to lie about this just to be able to rawdog you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/19 11:35 PM
21

People do this ALL the time, men AND women. I know I tend to actually end up in LTRs with dudes I am like 50% into because it gives me a reason to never really open up and be vulnerable. Even if I did meet a guy I was super into I'd be scared shitless. Men are the same way. This "sophisticated and classy" lady this guy is imagining is just a way to put distance between him and his GF. It's a way for him to have one foot out to protect himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/19 05:39 PM
23

I dated a "kinky" guy and sex with him was soooo obnoxious. It was like a 3-hour dog and pony show of ridiculousness. Call me unadventurous, but if we aren't done in an hour from start to finish, hell naw.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/11/19 05:24 PM
36

Most guys are a draaaaaaaaag, let's face it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 10:36 PM
30

Men do this to suss out if you are seeing other people. They assume if you are a good looking woman, you are likely crawling with dude orbiters and admirers at the very minimum. Do NOT say you're a loner. Shrug it off, wave it off, laugh at it, then move on to the next subject. Most guys will assume the worst and it's better if he thinks he has to compete for you than if he thinks he doesn't.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 08:59 PM
25

Don't get married young
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 08:56 PM
6

I don't know if I can recall this sub encouraging cheating... did I miss something?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 08:56 PM
5

I made it very clear I wanted to have sex with him often and a lot, and got kinky and overly sexual.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 08:42 PM
2

Ugh, drama. So sorry you are feeling down. Leave them to their messy relationship while you go move on to better pastures.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 06:51 PM
1

But he wasn't in an actual open relationship, right?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 06:49 PM
3

I was lured in by an "open relationship" guy before, too. Then I realized he ONLY reached out to me when his gf was out of town. Then I told him I wanted to meet her and he... ghosted me. Lesson learned. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 06:46 PM
2

Word to the wise for the future, sis... approach any guy who says he's in an open relationship with caution. Most of the time they are full of shit. But, please don't despair. Part of the reason so many of us have issues these days is that women aren't encouraged to give each other real talk. You have us now to give you the real scoop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 06:44 PM
13

Never put your life on hold while you're working on yourself. Keep dating. I kept myself from trying to date and get experience in my 20's because of this exact reason and I regret it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 06:00 PM
13

I'm childless and almost 40, and I sometimes run into a highschool classmate at the grocery store who has 3 little ones (all under 10). She always laments when we see each other how young I look. Taking care of others is STRESSFUL and takes a toll!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 05:03 PM
19

Ugh. Yes. Ime most guys can really rattle on about themselves. My theory is that they are sooooo repressed from not having any actual friends or connections so they just latch on to women because they associate women with their mommies. I went out to dinner with a guy who rambled on about his spreadsheets and financial analysis at work in exhaustive detail and I was totally checked out and instead mentally thinking about what outfit I was going to wear the next day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 03:56 PM
11

I'll echo what others have said. Men already have multiple tactics for creating ambiguity in their response to this question, so there's no use in asking. Here are a few: "I am just open for anything. I am looking for a connection, ultimately." (Notice how "connection" implies a relationship... do not assume that's what he means) "I'm just looking to see if we click or not." "Looking for casual... but open minded for more" (run from this one. "Open minded for more" is something that will likely …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 03:51 PM
3

Their intent behind this is so that you are monogamous with them without actual defined exclusivity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 03:49 PM
6

I do think this guy was hell bent on avoiding a relationship all together, but I think I COULD have been the game changer if I'd have changed up a few things. But maybe not. Who knows! C'est la vie.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 03:48 PM
1

Match.com
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/11/19 03:47 PM
15

I wanted to write more. I've dated about 3-4 guys that have pulled this move. Maybe 6 weeks-2 months into dating, they start lamenting online dating, and then say "Man, I am done with that site. I am deleting my profile--NOT worth it." If I don't remove mine immediately, I usually get the same lamentation about a week later. "Now that I am off Tinder/Bumble/Hinge/etc., I am so much happier."... It usually only takes two mentions before I quit. MISTAKE.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 11:45 PM
13

My sticking point is always when I start to like them, I worry about losing them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 11:43 PM
16

Plating is when a guy sees you casually once in a while, mostly for sex. They call it "spinning plates" when a guy has multiple women he does this with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 11:35 PM
3

You're welcome!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 11:34 PM
27

Nothing wrong with wanting a provider.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 11:34 PM
13

Yeah, I've been a total fool in the past with this - I have taken my profile down a few times just because the guy did. Now I know.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 10:56 PM
40

This guy is one of the best I've ever dated PLUS he had a ton of money, and I am DEFINITELY kicking myself for these mistakes.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 10:43 PM
1

Wow, I gotta read this...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 04:26 PM
15

HA. Yes, the last guy I dated was this exact same way. He went to therapy just to have a reason to be MORE of a victim.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/11/19 04:20 PM
2

That's why both people are toxic in this situation.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 08:23 PM
18

I forgot to include his tirade about how he has never wanted to just have a regular 9-5 and how DEPRESSING it sounded to just WORK all the time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 06:44 PM
21

This is something that actually happened a few years ago. After it happened I wrote down EXACTLY what had been said because I thought I might need to refer back to it later. I actually cut out a ton more from this post because it was getting repetitive. I think the thing that shocked me the most was him going on about how he resented his son because he never wanted him and he was forced to be a teen dad (how about wrap up your dick ya dumb idiot), AND he also ranted about how much he hated women…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 06:43 PM
4

Spot all the problematic shit and toxicity for a FUN GAME
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 06:00 PM
9

What's up with dudes being so lax on the dental hygiene, too? I dated a guy who like, never brushed his teeth. Barf.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/11/19 03:14 PM
10

This guy shouldn't be allowed to practice law, ever. I dated a lawyer for 5 years, and losing his license was one of the only things that kept him from being a total degenerate.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:31 PM
14

Oh my GOD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:28 PM
6

I never even MET this guy in person, I should note, but he immediately gave me creep vibes and when I insisted on going out first before allowing him to come to my home, he had a mantrum and told me I was emotionally unstable.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:28 PM
14

So I went ahead and googled this guy again, and it looks like he's been charged with harassing women and girls online since I had my run-in with him. Someone filed a complaint accusing him of "soliciting sex and sexually explicit photos from minors and women on social media" and is trying to get him disbarred. Link to story
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:20 PM
3

And, google image search revealed multiple mug shots of the dude
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:14 PM
14

I have NO IDEA. I am still baffled to this day how he managed to be a lawyer after doing HARD time. But I literally ran a background check on the guy - he was a legit lawyer, and a statutory rapist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 10:14 PM
20

I've had some bad encounters with lawyers. 3 out of 4 of them turned out to be secretly married, and one was even a sex offender.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 09:49 PM
54

Proceed with caution: Lawyers
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 08:07 PM
15

I'll add that men also take more risks because they basically see themselves as disposable
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:28 PM
9

Men take more risks, and that is because they can, historically, because they aren't responsible for the well-being of their children as much as the women are. Even today, men take more risks, and are more apt to improvise and experiment. Women are planners and more risk averse. I work in the corporate world, and I interview people often--ranging from entry level to execs. Women are always prepared to the teeth. Always. Men are nearly always unprepared and shoot from the hip.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:28 PM
8

No. My friends are my friends. My sister is in a relationship with her "best friend" and she lets him leech off her - all he brings to the table is obscure trivia knowledge that doesn't pay the bills and won't help them buy a new house.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:12 PM
7

Honestly, his response is a giveaway that he's cheap. Just drop him.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:11 PM
8

I just always assume they are paying. I never reach for my wallet or even glance at the bill. Never had an issue so far. My company is worth it, imo.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:09 PM
17

The biggest reveal I have to oust a broke loser is to tell him that my ex bought me a convertible. Yes, moid, I am Helen of Troy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:07 PM
12

Do your research
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:05 PM
14

I have been mostly lucky in that I have encountered men who rarely or never watch porn. They do exist.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 05:05 PM
19

Every guy I know that gets laid often and easily is usually very attractive and willing to fuck almost anything. These moids with insanely high standards are just signing up for celibacy.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 04:59 PM
11

Thank you, thank you!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 04:46 PM
33

Thank you for posting this. I went through my other username's history and realized I gave away too much, so I am BACK with a fresh new account. Can I get my FDS Disciple flair back?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/11/19 04:26 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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