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alphatectz Archive

View 12 posts and 85 comments by alphatectz on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

This is my first Xmas eve without my kids. My STBX is at her parents house while I’m just getting in from work. Tomorrow I’ll be able to see my kids for a couple of hours since my mother is picking them up, sadly I wasn’t able to afford any gifts for my kids, but I am taking them to the movies so I can spend some time with them. Roughly I have no clue on what to do with anything now. I just hope that my STBX doesn’t change her mind about letting my mother pick up my kids. Guess I’ll find out in …
/r/Divorce_Men25/12/19 07:58 AM
14

You get yourself right. Mind, body and soul. One day she’ll see how you gotten better and moved on and she’ll realize what she done and see the truth about the douchebag and regret everything.
/r/Divorce_Men03/12/19 12:13 AM
2

Oh I am. Just figuring out how to get the money for the retainer right now.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/19 11:31 PM
0

Tried for over a years, none of us filed yet, I know she is in a relationship with her affair partner of over a year now as well.
/r/Divorce_Men13/10/19 10:30 PM
1

I’m still stuck inside, but I go out between the hours I can be out. What sucks is that my kids are in school and I can’t really spend time with them cause they both get out at different times. Plus during the weekends I can’t see them because they are supposed to be with their mother in Saturday’s and Sunday she supposedly works and my daughter has ballet which she has missed twice so far.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 06:42 PM
1

I figured it would be costly. It honestly I want my kids to be safe and their tiny minds to be at ease with what this women is saying and doing. I have all the proof of her affair which she is trying to state that it began during the summer of this year instead of last year. (Which I find it funny, b/c she “loves this guy and cannot live without him”) Then she is stating that I cannot FaceTime my kids when I want because the DA, and other people are stating that and there isn’t a visitation orde…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 06:17 PM
1

Well I’ll be with my kids tomorrow from 1-4. After that I have to be back at where I’m staying at by 5pm. Then I’m stuck in for the remainder of the day.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 04:45 PM
2

Thank you.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:43 PM
2

I finally got in contact with a lawyer. Meeting him this Thursday. Was told not to file anything until I meet with him.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:38 PM
1

Your right. I will change for my kids and become a better version of myself. Well me and my STBX cannot have any communication plus I know she hates my guts (not sure why, I gave her everything and done anything for her). As for the days to be spent with my kids. It’s hard for me cause if my job, I hardly get weekends off, but I know what days I have off ahead of time. So I’ll figure it out with my kids.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:34 PM
2

Well I have proof of them together in photos and text messages from them about the relationship and some txt that was saved from her to me stating she met a real man and other stuff. Also I wrote down every single back transactions from last year until august of this year on hotels, get always, liquors, restaurants and so on. Also the APs wife confirmed that the AP and his wife are still married and they have a joint account and confirms that the AP hasn’t taken any money out from the account to…
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:29 PM
1

I was told that NYS/C is both a no fault and fault state, and that if the SO is at fault for adultery then the tables are turned on them. It makes sense on why she doesn’t want to handle anything through the courts since the AP already had an affair before and his wife took everything from him before.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:11 PM
1

Well I know she wanted to make sure the divorce was nasty, but not she doesn’t want to involve the court at all. I know one I file for divorce under adultery she doesn’t get anything from me besides child support. I’m in titled to 40% of her pension and not sure what else. We Live in NYC so it’s a fault and No fault state. So I think that’s why she doesn’t want to deal with the courts.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 01:31 PM
2

Your right. I shouldn’t be salty, she wasn’t a bad wife nor mother, but she has changed a lot and is hardly with the kids in the weekends.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 01:25 PM
2

Your right, I’m going to call a few more lawyers tomorrow to see if I can go in for a consultation and find out the pricing. Honestly I’m scared of the entire divorce thing, I would of never thought of this at all. Plus my so called 10th year wedding anniversary is literally a day away now and I’m just feeling very down.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 03:20 AM
2

Well we cannot have any type of communication at all due to an order of protection she has against me until 2021, plus I know for a fact that if she ever drops it or I somehow get it dropped. She will not contact me for anything at all. I know this for a fact since she has her AP pulling her strings on everything she does and says. I just need a lawyer to handle everything for me, but it’s hard since funds are very limited right now.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:40 AM
2

Yes it’s a fault state. So I should have the upper hand.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:07 AM
2

Well I’m in NYC, it’s a 50/50 state. So whenever I get a lawyer which I can afford I will be filing for divorce under adultery.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:05 AM
5

Hmm, well when I first filed. I did it for joint custody and visitation, but couldn’t get the papers served. Maybe I’ll just stick with that again and make sure the papers get served. My STBX has been stating that she will make sure to get sole custody before and to make sure that I have supervised visits on her terms, but now she doesn’t want to involve anything with the courts. So I’m just confused with what the hell she is trying to do.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 02:02 AM
3

I wouldn’t even know how or where to start with the details. Nor what to write on while I want to file for full custody. I need to figure this out.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 01:29 AM
3

Oh I will. I just don’t know what to expect when the court date comes. Or what she will day or do to make my life more difficult.
/r/Divorce_Men08/10/19 12:59 AM
1

Ok
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 11:49 PM
1

I don’t remember the name. But I’ll looking up the DAs office.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 11:48 PM
1

So apparently I was just txted by the guys that I’m being watched and that she will call me later to explain everything she found out.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 09:26 PM
1

UPDATE: Now I get a message from my mother stating that my STBX said if my mother doesn’t answer her. The cops will get answers from my. I already contacted the 2 lawyers that handled my criminal court cases via txt, and I’m currently I’m waiting for them to call me back now. I cannot believe this at all. I don’t know what to expect or do.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 06:32 PM
1

I haven’t even began the divorce process yet. We aren’t even legally separated. My mom is about to print out all the txt messages she has with my STBX and states that she’s going to the cops. (I really don’t believe her at all)
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 05:40 PM
1

Wait, I had to read this twice. My STBX also accused me of DV, Rape, hacking her email, bank account and stealing from her as well!!!! She also said to people that I’m a dead beat dad and husband. I’m meeting with the AP wife this weekend. Plus I’m sure my STBX will be with him while I’m with his wife talking about everything.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 05:34 PM
1

I don’t have any of stuff. I have my kids social numbers jotted down plus I have my tax returns from last year which has mine and my STBX wife info on it and it shows that she makes a lot more than I do. I think she’s mad because the guys wife called her the other day after me and her spoke. And she confronted her husband if 23yrs about everything.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 03:35 PM
1

I never got the DAs number nor email. Plus the criminal case has been over since September 19th. Plus I paid whatever fine they wanted me to pay.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 03:08 PM
1

The cops told me before after my 2nd attest that my STBX is crazy and will continue with her bullshit. So here it is, more bullshit. I can’t do anything and if she does get me arrested again for this nonsense then I will definitely lost my job.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 02:55 PM
1

NP
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 05:59 AM
1

The sheriff should be able to.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 05:58 AM
1

Oh, hmm if you know your STBX schedule or when she’s home they can get there instead of her work place
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 05:50 AM
2

Process server.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/19 02:27 AM
1

Send it now. Don’t wait like how I waited.
/r/Divorce_Men01/10/19 02:42 PM
1

Appreciate it. I know she isn’t hoeing around and that she’s with the man she cheated on me with fit over a year, but there I go again defending her. It’s going to be 3 months since I left and we have been separated.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/19 04:22 PM
1

Your right, i worry about her to much and I shouldn’t even care. I know it will take time and time is all I have. I’ll make sure that I’m the best father for my kids and give them everything they need and want.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/19 04:13 PM
1

Your right, next week I’m going to setup an appointment with one of the u ion lawyers from my job and get this handled. I had enough with my STBX. She’s using my kids against me. Leaving them with aunt which comes from PA at my home while she goes out for the night and doesn’t come back home. This has been an on going thing.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/19 01:14 PM
1

Well my STBX has been saying a lot of nasty stuff to my kids about me. My daughter is the one that tells me everything. She has a big mouth which is good for me so I can bite everything down. For example last night my kids were dropped off at my STBX great grandmothers house after my mother (their other grandmother) was with them after school. I was able to see my kids for 2 hours so I was happy about that. But then. My daughter FaceTime me and told me that they are back home and that mommy left…
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/19 01:12 PM
1

Also sorry for the typo in the heading of the post. It’s supposed to be Advice.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/19 02:25 AM
1

Honestly this really sucks. It’s been 2 months and change since I left the house and when we officially have been separated now. My STBX states that she has been single since March. Which is bullshit, she did stop wearing her rings back then though, but things began to get better up until the end of July.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/19 02:24 AM
1

Honestly this has made my depression much worse now. It’s very hard some days for me. Since the oop has been taken off from my daughter I’m able to see her and my son for at least 30mins during the week. Since I’m able to pick them up from the bus stop. But my STBX told my kids that I shouldn’t do that. So yeah. I really need some advice.
/r/Divorce_Men27/09/19 02:08 AM
1

Thanks, I had the restraining order dropped from my daughter. My STBX has one until 2021 now. So she’s using my own mother to give me messages which I simply ignore since I refuse to get into any issues with my STBX.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 11:14 PM
1

I’m working on the lawyer part, I know my STBX can’t afford a lawyer and I know that she needs $2000 for one from her union. I have all my tax forms and stuff. My STBX got rid of whatever that belong to me in the house since I left in the end of June. I just need to make sure that my STBX doesn’t keep my kids away from me.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 07:34 PM
1

Well my STBX told all her friends and family members that she broke up with me months ago. Even though I left a few months after she stated everything. Everyone cut me off that knew me and she claims that she has been single since March. Everyone on social media blocked me or kept me on to see if I posted anything. So I just played it smart, but hardly lost things or just blocking certain stuff that her friends and family cannot see at all.
/r/Divorce_Men25/09/19 02:08 PM
1

I’m not waiting. Tomorrow is my court date for all the bullshit I’ve been through with my STBX. Once Friday morning comes I’m heading to family court and file.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/19 11:59 PM
1

Very good point!
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/19 05:33 PM
2

I know
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/19 09:22 PM
1

Your absolutely right!
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/19 09:11 PM
3

Indeed I will, waiting for this court date in a few days. After that I’m going to beat her at these games that the STBX plays.
/r/Divorce_Men16/09/19 08:26 PM
1

I just remembered that I have txt messages from her stating that she doesn’t want child support or anything at all, not sure if that’s good for me, but honestly I will give my children everything and anything they want. I’m just worried that when she does go for child support whatever she gets will not be for the kids. I know I can’t do anything about that either. Also since I’m meeting with my union lawyer I’m not sure what type of divorce they will go for. Since she cheated and I have proof of…
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/19 01:42 PM
2

I know what you went through. I’m going through it now. Case is being dropped next week Thursday and all oops are being taken off because the DA notices all the Bs that my STBX did and said.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/19 05:31 AM
1

It sucks, I’ve been on paid sick leave from my job (going on 2 months now) while she’s telling people that I’ve been at work (apparently out of nowhere she knows a lot of people that work with me, which I know is bullshit) Also the fact that I know that she has been leaving my kids places to do her dirt. My own daughter which told my wife off in front of my mother (my mother is the one that watches the kids while me and my wife worked, and still has been watching the kids the entire summer since…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/19 02:39 PM
2

Well that’s the thing. My union only covers divorce. If I want a family lawyer lawyer I’ll have to pay out of pocket which I’ll find out the pricing next Tuesday. As for the aspect. There is infidelity (wife has been cheating on my for over a year with an older married man w/ kids from her job) and me and my wife have 2 young children B7 G5. She has a restraining order on me and my daughter as well, but that’s being dropped next week Thursday since the DA is in my favor. We aren’t legally separa…
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/19 02:06 PM
2

I’m located in NY, I’ll check out the link. Thanks.
/r/Divorce_Men11/09/19 01:24 PM
1

I wasn’t aware of the statistics at the time.
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/19 08:35 PM
1

Damn that’s sucks, trust me I know the feeling. Back in July after all hell broke loose I found out that my wife sent the man that she has been cheating on me with photos of my kids to him and photos of her and the kids to him. After seeing that I was so hurt. I wouldn’t be shocked if she actually introduced them to him, but from what my son has been telling me they have never met him but he has seen photos of his mom and the guy together and my wife got very mad at my son. My daughter (which tu…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/19 07:31 PM
1

I’m not ready to date, and it has been a little over 2 months since me and my with separated. I know she’s in a relationship with the man that she cheated on me with and I feel that she’s pregnant with his kid as well since me and my wife haven’t had sex since April. Plus I have a vasectomy. So I honestly hope that she isn’t pregnant. We have 2 young children together and I feel like the path she’s going down and has been going down will only ruin my kids if she is pregnant. I know for a fact th…
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/19 07:27 PM
1

Honestly, I never would of thought that I would be filing for divorce, me and my wife have now been separated for 2 months and change. She claims that she has been single for much longer, but I didn’t leave u til the end of June. I stayed hoping things would get better, but it has gotten a lot worse. Even after knowing that she has been cheating on me for over a year with the man that’s she’s with. We have 2 young children together (keep in mind that you don’t stay together b/c of the children. …
/r/Divorce_Men10/09/19 07:24 PM
1

I didn’t txt her. I can’t have any contact with her. She txt and called my mother about everything last night. Then my mother told me word by mouth about everything after they spoke. Then today with the same crap. I had to let my mother know to stop already and that she going to give me a panic attack soon.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/19 10:55 PM
1

I don’t have the ticket stub, but I sent the photo of it to my mother since she didn’t believe me. As for drinking I have had a few drinks, but I stay inside my home after 5pm and don’t do anything until the following day.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/19 10:48 PM
1

Setup a hidden camera where? There’s an oop and I can’t see my daughter or be around my home or wife. Why the hell would I do something stupid to break the oop when my court date is next week and I already know that my daughters oop and my case is being dropped.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/19 10:28 PM
2

That’s tricky then, but it seems like she wants more attention so give her the attention she’s asking for. As for the condoms. Try different types to see what you both like.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/19 01:55 AM
8

Use a condom, have sex more tell her to get on birth control, go to therapy.
/r/Divorce_Men09/09/19 01:40 AM
1

It’s both.
/r/Divorce_Men08/09/19 04:24 PM
1

I am, but I haven’t been able to serve her the papers for the visitation and custody. I have until this coming on day to do it since the first family court date is set for the 17th of this month. I also just found out that she reached out to my step mother & father (with whom I’m staying at right now) to get last years tax returns. So I’m sure she is going to file for child support and try to take everything from me.
/r/Divorce_Men07/09/19 04:32 PM
1

It’s a work in progress, I’m a CO but haven’t been able to go back to work since everything has happen. Luckily my job placed me on sick leave, but once the 24th of this month comes. I should be clear to go back to work. I’m currently at my fathers and his wife’s home, but I’m going to have to start doing things as a single guy again and of course I will always be a father to my kids and will make sure that I’m always around for them. I’m cutting ties with my mothers side of the family completel…
/r/Divorce_Men06/09/19 08:08 PM
2

I posted what happened and the reason why I have an oop. I’m working on getting a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 05:53 PM
1

I forgot to mention that Me and my wife are in our mid 30s with 2 kids. Son is 7 and my daughter is about to turn 5. Would of made 10yrs married in October and 15yrs together in November. My life is in shambles and I’m very depressed, and I don’t know what else to do now. I’m glad that I’ll be able to see my daughter now, but it will still be hard since my wife will most likely make it hard for me since both kids began school now and I can’t pick them up at home. Plus it’s Embarrassing that I ha…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 07:09 AM
1

I’m just tired of people telling me that she hates me and never wants to speak to me or see me and that I’m a bar person, husband and father. I was the one that was always home on my days off while my wife either worked over time or had plans with friends. I dropped off the kids at school in the mornings. Took my wife to work so she wouldn’t be late and picked up the kids from school and helped with home work before I had to leave to work in the later afternoon. I still don’t know why or when ex…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 06:58 AM
1

I just read all your post and I have to say is just watch out. I’m still in denial about my separation and everything that has happened with me and my wife. It honestly if it works out for you and your wife then I’m happy for you.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 06:21 AM
1

I’m working on that. Actually have been selling a lot of my stuff and putting money aside for my kids and for a lawyer.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 04:58 AM
1

I’m not considered as low income due to my job, but I am not near top pay yet. I know she wants full custody and be the sole guardian of the kids and I’m not sure what other motives she has.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 04:25 AM
1

I know. I honestly can’t afford a family court lawyer, so if or when she files for divorce. She’ll have the upper hand.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/19 03:59 AM
1

I know...
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:35 PM
2

Oh I know. The day that I was taken in. The cops kept asking me questions, I told them that I need my phone call. They decided to take there time with giving me a phone call. Once I got my calls, yes I made multiple calls. My job, my union rep, and my union to get my lawyer. Cops got upset, but either way I knew better not to say a word unless my lawyer was there.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:35 PM
2

I haven’t been back in the house or around her or my daughter since July 24th. I need to get my head straight. It’s hard after 14yrs.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:32 PM
1

You’re right.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:21 PM
1

I have a lawyer, but not a family court lawyer as of yet.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:20 PM
2

Trust me I’ve been knowing about this emotional affair which I knew was more then that then became a relationship between her and that asshole for over a year now. It’s hard every day for me, but I’m taking it day by day. Still having hope that she’ll see the wrong in everything and will cut ties with everyone that knew and didn’t have her best interested with our marriage. I agree, things will be a lot different if we do work things out. Trust will be a major part of it, but I’m going to make s…
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 04:37 AM
2

Oh wow, I wasn’t aware that she called the cops on me until the day after. I dropped my son off at home and they were waiting for me. They never read me my rights nor cuffed me. This all happened around 2:30pm. I was released (ROR) Around 9pm later that night. The night that everything happened my daughter ran to me and sat on my lap. I remember everything too. I covered her and he’d her so she wouldn’t see anything. I wasn’t even aware of what my wife did to me until the day after. My order of …
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 02:45 AM
2

I appreciate the words. I can’t afford a family court lawyer right now so my crimson case lawyer that was provided from my job is handling stuff for me. My lawyer was able to send all of the proof that I had from that night and everything else phone and txt logs going back from 2018 until the beginning of August before she decided to cancel my phone line. I was able to get my number back and luckily I was able to save everything before she went ahead and canceled everything. I also wrote down al…
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/19 01:32 AM
1

Well I’m in NYC and they favor the mothers more. Right now I’m just waiting to see how things are after the 19th. That’s when everything is supposed to be dropped.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/19 10:46 PM
2

And another thing. Divorce hasn’t been mention before I got arrested. So I’m not sure what my wife is planning to do. I don’t want to go through with it, but some advice would be great.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/19 09:46 PM
2

Oh and another thing. I found out that my wife has been having my aunt go over almost every weekend to the house. Keep in mind that my aunt lives in PA. (We live in NYC) and since I’ve been able to see my son lately he has told me that a guy has been staying over when my aunt comes to the house. They also have been drinking a lot. So this just gets so me upset.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/19 09:45 PM
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