~ archived since 2018 ~
~ archived since 2018 ~
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 7 | Court: Morris family judge deprived man of fair hearingImagine this same deprivation of due process repeated in divorce and custody battles across the country. Thank you Duluth Model for giving divorcing women easy access to a potent legal weapon that separates good men from family and property. | /r/MensRights | 26/08/15 04:35 AM |
| – | Feminist argues in favor of the Duluth model by it suggesting it is an utilitarian decisionThat comment stems from a post I made in MensLib. Unbelievably, one of the commenters in amr tries to point out inconsistencies in my story by posting a quote from that post and a post I made over a year ago that tell exactly the same story. I'm not sure we can expect much in the way of reading comprehension and analysis from a subreddit that exists solely to lob hysterical vitriol at us. Put another way, that sub is the place where reason goes to die. | /r/MensRights | 25/08/15 04:06 PM |
| 2 | As Minimum Wages Rise, Restaurants Say No to Tips, Yes to Higher PricesGet back to me when you know what the fuck you're talking about. | /r/MensRights | 24/08/15 09:34 PM |
| – | As Minimum Wages Rise, Restaurants Say No to Tips, Yes to Higher PricesI'm a waiter. I've been restaurant industry for over 10 years. You have no idea what you're talking about. | /r/MensRights | 24/08/15 09:01 PM |
| 2 | Custody Battle: To lawyer or not to lawyer?Begin filming the custody exchanges and tell her that you are doing this. In California it is illegal to film or record someone without their knowledge. Be sure that whoever you film is aware that you are filming or else you will get in trouble. | /r/MensRights | 21/08/15 09:51 PM |
| 2 | Custody Battle: To lawyer or not to lawyer?It is possible to succeed in family court without a lawyer but it is difficult. I successfully represented myself in court but I had several advantages working for me. Legal studies come easily for me, I had access to an excellent law library, and I hired a lawyer as a consultant for $100/hour via the California bar association. I prepared for each court appearance as well as I could, and then sat with the lawyer to discuss my work--sort of like seeing a professor during office hours before a bi… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/15 05:31 PM |
| 5 | Innocent man profiled as a violent deviant by police, users of /r/twox see it as excellent police work and an overall "positive experience."Meh? The same thing happened to me some years ago. After enough encounters like this, men learn that the police are not on your side. They are not where you go for help. This sort of policing is thanks to the Duluth Model with an assist from traditional thinking in which men perpetrate and women are victimized. | /r/MensRights | 20/08/15 09:43 PM |
| – | Goodbye victim feminists and soft men: hello, equity feminists and standup guys. Saw this on /r/MensLib, thought it should see some light here.Wait, really? I mean, not the part about feminism becoming more and more toxic, but the part about not recognizing how bad it was. I feel like his essay exposes feminism for what it was to those who have no idea, and provides context for the evil it is today. Now, I know there are people who call themselves feminists who are actually about gender equality. But the feminism that produces results is about misandry and revenge. I swear it's like dealing with someone with borderline personality diso… | /r/MensRights | 18/08/15 04:30 AM |
| – | Goodbye victim feminists and soft men: hello, equity feminists and standup guys. Saw this on /r/MensLib, thought it should see some light here.I used the title the author used. I didn't want to editorialize. | /r/MensRights | 18/08/15 03:04 AM |
| – | Goodbye victim feminists and soft men: hello, equity feminists and standup guys. Saw this on /r/MensLib, thought it should see some light here.To be clear, that title is the author's, not mine. I agree with your analysis; one legacy of feminism is enormous harm done to men's self esteems and sense of worth. This essay is useful for providing historical context. | /r/MensRights | 18/08/15 12:04 AM |
| – | Goodbye victim feminists and soft men: hello, equity feminists and standup guys. Saw this on /r/MensLib, thought it should see some light here.Clearly you did not: A, read the linked material B, read through my post history Didn't stop you from asking the mods to do exactly what r/feminism does all too quickly. | /r/MensRights | 17/08/15 11:18 PM |
| 0 | Goodbye victim feminists and soft men: hello, equity feminists and standup guys. Saw this on /r/MensLib, thought it should see some light here.Having fruitful discussions. In any case, I found this post interesting and relevant to the Nice Guy post currently stickied. | /r/MensRights | 17/08/15 10:48 PM |
| – | If you're an MRA, don't play MagicI've played magic since revised. I'm having a hard time forming a response right now that doesn't involve expletives. | /r/MensRights | 07/08/15 07:36 AM |
| 1 | Consent Laws - Read This & Judge Me (pretend I'm a celebrity and give me all you got)The issue here is that colleges and people are saying that drunk sex does = rape. Feminists could also decide to rename apples oranges, but no matter how hard they try to convince people, they'd still be apples. Drunk sex does not automatically equal rape. It didn't in the past, and it doesn't now after a year or two of feminist campaigning. What is fucked up is that you're trying to "get closure"--something you want, for yourself--by more or less stalking and harassing a girl who wants nothing … | /r/MensRights | 04/08/15 01:55 PM |
| – | Consent Laws - Read This & Judge Me (pretend I'm a celebrity and give me all you got)All right. I can't believe I'm saying this, but all of those cops? They're right. That was not rape. Drunk sex does not equal rape. Being drunk does not necessarily rob one of the ability to consent. A brief anecdote: I have a close female friend who was recently in the habit of getting quite drunk--oftentimes blackout drunk--and hooking up. In these instances she was the aggressor, and she laughed when I told her that by contemporary standards, she was raped. Listen, the potential problem here … | /r/MensRights | 04/08/15 03:23 AM |
| 1 | Father’s “rights”? Only for the rich.I too had to go up against a woman with an infinite legal resource (she had a free attorney from a feminist legal aid organization). We battled until I had spent over $30,000 in 6 months, completely bankrupting me. After that it was me, in propina persona, versus her attorney. You know what happened? I began to win. I hit the law library and studied like my life depended on it. I spent countless hours working on my case, as desperate as any man wrongly separated from his child. I stove off depre… | /r/MensRights | 31/07/15 05:32 PM |
| – | My yearly message to the young men of reddit re: marriage, Divorce and the family courts.My warning to all you redditors is think really hard about who you marry and if you get divorced do not expect fairness or justice from the family courts... Lets me just say I was a normal hardworking guy before my divorce and now I am just a hollowed out shell of a man. I felt those two lines could use some emphasis. I disagree that there is no justice to be found but strongly agree that you cannot expect to find it in the family courts. | /r/MensRights | 29/07/15 02:43 PM |
| – | 'Why I Am Not a Feminist' -- Short Tale of AbuseIt's more than custody starting at 50/50. The courts need to stop making decisions based solely on the word of a woman. DV accusations are common in custody cases because they are effective. That needs to stop. | /r/MensRights | 22/07/15 07:29 PM |
| 1 | 40yo woman rapes 12yo boy for two years. According to Judge though, she didn't abuse him, but had a "sexual relationship" with him. Wait for the slap on the wrist.I don't see anything in the article to suggest this woman is getting fewer than 10 years. And further, the judge did not call the rape a sexual relationship; she clearly stated that one cannot have a sexual relationship with a child, that is, such a thing is not possible. | /r/MensRights | 01/07/15 04:22 PM |
| – | 40yo woman rapes 12yo boy for two years. According to Judge though, she didn't abuse him, but had a "sexual relationship" with him. Wait for the slap on the wrist.OP listen, your title is totally at odds with the article. The judge said the offender had to be jailed to send a message to the community that people cannot have sexual relationships with children [emphasis added]. We'll be waiting a long time for that slap on the wrist. | /r/MensRights | 01/07/15 08:43 AM |
| 2 | Since when was the hijab a feminist statement? - Spectator BlogsConservative Islam attracts Islamic women precisely because the Quran dictates gender equality. Gender inequality is a legacy of Arab culture, not Islam. Hence, Arab Muslim feminists find in conservative Islam an unassailable space to establish equality in a society that otherwise traditionally discriminates against women. | /r/MensRights | 26/06/15 06:16 AM |
| – | New Washington Post poll seems to support the 1-in-5 statistic. Thoughts?Well, it has already been addressed here, most notably by Pierce Harlan. | /r/MensRights | 21/06/15 06:19 PM |
| 1 | Refutation of "Women's Historical Oppression"Self published, I take it? | /r/MensRights | 18/06/15 03:29 AM |
| – | Action Opportunity: Ask the IRS to Investigate the Appearance that N.O.W. is Abusing Its Tax Exempt StatusDone. | /r/MensRights | 18/06/15 03:24 AM |
| 45 | Turned down a girl for sex yesturday... she grabbed my cock anyway, and got real nasty when I stopped her from going further.I've also experienced this. I think it comes from the assumption that men always want sex. They interpret your turning them down as an insult to them, as if you're saying that they're so hideous that you are willing to do the unthinkable, to, as a man, not have sex, as ludicrous in their minds as if you were dying of thirst and turned down a life saving draught of pure mountain spring water. | /r/MensRights | 14/06/15 06:40 PM |
| 9 | Is anyone else here an MRA-supporting liberal?I'm liberal and a MRA. Liberal politics do not preclude one from men's rights activism. I feel that seeking equality is an inherently progressive pursuit, an attempt to break from traditions and mores of the past. | /r/MensRights | 10/06/15 01:47 AM |
| 7 | Domestic abuser Hope Solo lies, blames her victims, hides behind Duluth Model tactics, and even male-bashed the police who arrested her.Sometimes I get really tired of all the "look a woman did something that feminists say only men do" posts on here. I get it, but it's not productive. Usually, but the Duluth Model--encoded in domestic violence law worldwide--is specifically predicated on the mistaken notion that domestic violence is something only men perpetrate. It is therefore relevant to men's rights to highlight every example in which our society enforces laws and social norms that draw their wisdom from that false, misandri… | /r/MensRights | 09/06/15 02:06 AM |
| 3 | Men's role models for behaviour should be an animal according to the NYTNot according to the NYT. According to an op-ed in the NYT. Nevertheless: Males of very few other species help procure food year-round for the entire family, assist in raising their young to full maturity and defend their packs year-round against others of their species who threaten their safety. Male wolves appear to stick more with that program than their human counterparts do. Wow. | /r/MensRights | 09/06/15 01:45 AM |
| – | Domestic abuser Hope Solo lies, blames her victims, hides behind Duluth Model tactics, and even male-bashed the police who arrested her.Nothing in the article indicates that Solo is lying or hiding behind Duluth Model tactics. This is a they said/she said case, and it is at present unclear who to believe. | /r/MensRights | 08/06/15 04:41 PM |
| – | Johnson challenging Dutton in the literature. Any known rebuttal?This? Edit: Dragiewicz (2008) argues that any criticism of feminist sociology and the gender paradigm is "inseparable from the broader context of contemporary resistance to and reaction against feminism" (op.cit. p. 121). From a theoretical/empirical perspective, the Dragiewicz (2008) paper could have been written in 1978. "Feminist" theory has not advanced, but remains a closed system, unresponsive to data that would force a more complex view of IPV. and: One of the problems with the constant s… | /r/MensRights | 02/06/15 06:38 AM |
| – | Johnson challenging Dutton in the literature. Any known rebuttal?After saying men are never the victims he then "debunks" his first anti-feminist complaint, namely they say that feminists say men are never victims. No, that's not at all what he's saying. He argues that there are many male victims--"situational couple violence" shows "rough gender symmetry in perpetration." He also says that situational couple violence comprises the majority of IPV. Your critique of his reliance on agency studies is spot on though. He found that "intimate terrorism" is highly … | /r/MensRights | 02/06/15 05:33 AM |
| 3 | I am a fairly sophisticated family lawyer in a liberal jurisdiction. I believe the laws and courts are not biased against men*. AMAThere are several matters within California family law that require reform. The most complex problem is disentangling the Duluth Model from divorce proceedings. I won't get into much detail right now, but the short of it is that it is, in fact, far too easy for women to successfully, falsely allege domestic violence to gain at least a momentary initial advantage in the divorce proceedings. The laws may be written in gender neutral language, but the authors of the Duluth Model intended that they … | /r/MensRights | 27/05/15 06:53 AM |
| 10 | One year after breaking up my ex has filed a restraining order against me and made a false claim against me to the board of nursingdon't be nice she is not your friend she is your enemy and should be treated as such. This can be a hard lesson to master, but it is very important. | /r/MensRights | 22/05/15 07:21 AM |
| 2 | Posters Go Up Around Columbia Calling Mattress Rape Protester A "Pretty Little Liar"Well played. | /r/MensRights | 20/05/15 04:36 PM |
| – | Why Some Male Members of Congress Won’t Be Alone with Female Staffers - NationalJournal.com"If you're serious about your career you're not going to go around screwing your boss." Uh huh. | /r/MensRights | 18/05/15 12:10 AM |
| 7 | How Do You Defend Yourself Against Falsely-Claimed Domestic Assault?2 words: lawyer up. | /r/MensRights | 15/05/15 11:22 PM |
| – | What do you guys think about this?Some of the points are good, some less so, but regarding an egalitarian relationship? There is this . . . | /r/MensRights | 01/05/15 10:15 AM |
| 1 | ex agrees to lower child support, how officially?That sounds like how it works in California. That is, there is a state guideline amount below which no judge will set support unless both parties agree. Assuming Georgia law does operate the same way, you will be able to agree to a new lower amount and have the court certify it. | /r/MensRights | 30/04/15 03:36 PM |
| 5 | Feminists say men need to open up more and talk about their issues and they won't kill themselves. All the while the whole point of /r/againstmensrights is to ridicule and humiliate men in /r/mensrights who open up and talk about their issues. What gives?The tl;dr of the Duluth Model is that it is the feminist view of domestic violence in which only men, as power holders in a patriarchal society, can perpetrate violence and only women can be victims. In practice it means male victims aren't believed and may be treated like criminals (that is, arrested if they call for help) and that women can easily get protective orders without proof of harm (a common divorce strategy that keeps fathers from children on pain of incarceration), among other thing… | /r/MensRights | 15/04/15 01:11 AM |
| – | Feminists say men need to open up more and talk about their issues and they won't kill themselves. All the while the whole point of /r/againstmensrights is to ridicule and humiliate men in /r/mensrights who open up and talk about their issues. What gives?There are definitely issues that men face that I think feminism would agree with and see the problem as something to do with the current system and way we frame the genders. Really? So there are feminists who will advocate against the Duluth Model? | /r/MensRights | 15/04/15 12:05 AM |
| 8 | Feminists say men need to open up more and talk about their issues and they won't kill themselves. All the while the whole point of /r/againstmensrights is to ridicule and humiliate men in /r/mensrights who open up and talk about their issues. What gives?Againstmensrights often attempts to "point out the double standards and lack of self awareness" of r/mensrights, but is only able to do so by ripping comments and posts from their context or ignoring comments and post scores that indicate the degree to which the community agrees with a particular sentiment. For example, a recent post entitled "Pretty much 'Man Up!': The Post" would carry more weight as a vehicle for criticizing r/mensrights if not for the fact the the linked post's vote total is… | /r/MensRights | 14/04/15 09:27 PM |
| 5 | Women still earn a lot less than menI'd really like to comment with something a little more articulate than "you've got to be fucking kidding me," but really New York Times editorial board? You've got to be fucking kidding me. | /r/MensRights | 14/04/15 01:20 PM |
| 1 | Justice Department intervenes in lawsuit supporting transgender woman's right to better medical care and safer housing in male prison. The male prisoners? Well, who gives a shit?The rational response should be to ask why is this prison allowed to be so dangerous for ALL inmates. Yes, and Ms. Diamond's plight draws more attention to the deplorable, and possibly unconstitutional (c.f., federal court ordering California to reduce its prison population) treatment of male prisoners in the U.S. | /r/MensRights | 08/04/15 04:18 PM |
| – | I’m a male who identifies as a feminist. Starting conversation about gender equality between MRAs and Feminists.I've said it before and I'll say it again now: Once feminists apologize for and work to overturn the Duluth Model, and once feminists apologize for their work against and promise to advocate in favor of shared parenting, I'll take feminist overtures of cooperation in working toward gender equality seriously. Until and unless that happens, no MRA has any reason to believe that a movement ideologically grounded in the patriarchy hypothesis--a disprovable, disproven, misandric description of how so… | /r/MensRights | 06/04/15 05:34 PM |
| 2 | Officer arrested after his ex-wife hit him during a custody exchange; arrest contributed to his firingIn September 2012, Hauschild was placed on administrative leave after he was involved in an altercation with his ex-wife, who hit him in the face and body during a child-custody exchange, the suit says. Hauschild was arrested by Alameda County sheriff’s deputies but wasn’t charged in the case. | /r/MensRights | 05/04/15 03:26 AM |
| 10 | Longest hunger strike in US history in protest against his wrongful conviction. Force fed and tortured.Either this guy is innocent or he is a really determined liar. The latter seems highly improbable. | /r/MensRights | 01/04/15 03:09 PM |
| 3 | {Debate} What should the MRM's next step be?I have been considering using California's initiative process to attempt to effect changes in state domestic violence laws. I feel that eliminating some of the more pernicious aspects of these laws--particularly with respect to BIPs and restraining orders--would do a lot to help a great many men. I'd also like to figure out a way to rewrite these laws that would make it more difficult for women to falsely allege domestic violence so as to gain the upper hand in divorce and custody proceedings. P… | /r/MensRights | 30/03/15 08:09 PM |
| 1 | Need legal help, family court, CaliforniaI don't know that anything like that exists. If you go to the bar association and apply for a low cost attorney, you may be able to get one for $100/hour. | /r/MensRights | 26/03/15 10:04 PM |
| – | As I'm having a conversation with a feminist. She's right?You know what? Agree with her, and then ask her about the Duluth Model. The Duluth Model--that feminist final solution to domestic violence--is so blatantly discriminatory that her support or lack thereof will tell you all you need to know about the sort of feminism to which she subscribes. | /r/MensRights | 26/03/15 04:59 PM |
| 3 | Stubborn pay gap is found in nursingRight. And I shouldn't have said "men are paid more," but rather "men earn more." | /r/MensRights | 24/03/15 07:42 PM |
| – | Stubborn pay gap is found in nursingThe study did not address reasons underpinning the persistent gap. This sentence, buried near the bottom of the blog post, should have been near the top. I'm glad it was included at all. This, however, was near the beginning: “We now have pretty compelling evidence that there are pay inequalities between men and women in nursing over the past 25 years,” [emphasis mine]. "Inequalities" is a perfect word to use when describing a relationship between quantities that differ in value. It is also poli… | /r/MensRights | 24/03/15 04:00 PM |
| – | Male victims of emotional/verbal/relationship abuse, please tell me about your experience.Did you feel comfortable talking to friends/family about what was going on? Did they come to you about things they noticed? If so, what were those conversations like? While I endured the abuse, I spoke about it to my best friend (a woman). I didn't recognize it as abuse, however. She did. After describing my responses to my ex's jealousy motivated controlling behavior, my friend said I sounded like "a battered woman." At the time, I shrugged off her remark because it never occurred to me that a … | /r/MensRights | 24/03/15 02:53 AM |
| 8 | More sexist drivel from The Guardian. Use archive.today and don't give them a click.Most feminists, like me, shun the label and work to convince people that despite the stereotypes feminists absolutely, without a doubt, do not hate men. But so what if we did? Indeed, what if you did? You might successfully lobby governments to enact domestic violence laws that completely elide male victims, are easily manipulated by women in divorce proceedings, and result in the all too facile estrangement of children from fathers, all the while failing to do anything about the problem of dome… | /r/MensRights | 23/03/15 10:16 PM |
| 1 | My teacher is insisting the wage gap is a very real issue so I told her I would right a paper on it. Does anyone have any sources to aprove/disprove it.(though I'm pretty sure what it will be on this sub)Here you go. Links to more sources provided at the bottom. | /r/MensRights | 23/03/15 10:05 PM |
| – | 'No Boys Allowed' day teaches girls about science, mathThey almost certainly receive federal financial assistance. That's how private institutions like Harvard have been made to react to threats of Title IX related disciplinary action. | /r/MensRights | 17/03/15 04:50 AM |
| – | Madonna claims gays, blacks have it easy compared to women, who represent the "last frontier" of oppressionThe left-wing myth is this: There has been no progress, nothing has changed, the country is as racist, sexist, and homophobic as it ever was. Not true. Racism is still a problem, sexism is still a problem, and homophobia is still a problem—and those aren't our only problems. But our society isn't just arguably less racist, less sexist, and less homophobic today than it was 50 years ago, it's obviously less racist, sexist, and homophobic. --Dan Savage | /r/MensRights | 17/03/15 01:49 AM |
| 4 | Recruiting reddit feminists and MRAs for a social psychology study! (updated)Well ok. But I still don't like being forced to choose between 1 of 2 options when doing so gives a false indication of my feelings on a topic. | /r/MensRights | 16/03/15 05:19 AM |
| – | Recruiting reddit feminists and MRAs for a social psychology study! (updated)Way too long. Too many repetitive questions. Too many questions that set up a false dichotomy, e.g., "is A true or B true?" What if I think A and B are both true? I'm disinclined to pick either A or B. I did quit the survey though. | /r/MensRights | 16/03/15 03:42 AM |
| 7 | If you smile at a woman, that's sexist. If you don't smile, that's sexist, too.Indifference is hostile sexism. | /r/MensRights | 10/03/15 08:19 AM |
| – | Wife is verbally and emotionally abusive; we just had a child. I am the sole breadwinner. What can I do to protect my child and myself?Hire the best attorney you can afford. File for divorce and petition the court for sole physical and legal custody. Document everything. Do this quickly, and without telegraphing your moves. Be on guard for a false domestic violence accusation. | /r/MensRights | 08/03/15 06:50 PM |
| 4 | "John Travolta, Joe Biden, and why men touch women's bodies without asking"So for all the women who've touched me without my permission, and all those who will in the future (I'm a waiter, it happens), let me guess: the patriarchy made them do it. I'm sure somehow I'm the perpetrator asserting my masculinity and they are blameless victims. Ragebait indeed. | /r/MensRights | 05/03/15 05:56 PM |
| 3 | Gentlemen, Stop Dating Young Hot Women... Makers of the New James Bond Movie Hire 50 Year Old Actress as Bond's New Babe... Used Up Older Women Hitting 'The Wall' Means 50 is the New 20So the author argues that: Although a 16-plus year age gap is more of a rarity in real life, in Hollywood it’s pretty standard, and somehow not considered ridiculous. Well, ok. And then she observes, "But two new films are signaling a shift." Oh cool, argument that trend is changing, and you have supporting evidence. Whatcha got? Patricia Clarkson, 55, is romancing Scott Speedman, 39, in October Gale out next week. Ah, thanks for presenting a 16 year age gap as evidence that film makers are shif… | /r/MensRights | 26/02/15 03:02 PM |
| – | Stopping Bad Logic is a StartSomething that comes to mind is there is nothing to gain from being a rapist. A rapist has a lot to lose. A decade in prison is not worth how much time? Why would someone lie about being a rapist? To avoid prison? To avoid being officially listed as a sex offender? To avoid social condemnation? What are you trying to say here? | /r/MensRights | 24/02/15 08:24 AM |
| 1 | Straight Talk for White MenThe "white" vs "black" name and employability study may have uncovered a correlation between the sort of name one has and perceived employability, but I think it failed to explain why. Potential employers may have been less put off by racial differences than by cultural ones. One commenter observed: I worked for a year at an employment agency that served almost exclusively people with "obstacles" to employment-- no work history, no education, prison, limited English, etc. Most of the people who … | /r/MensRights | 22/02/15 04:31 PM |
| – | Why men and women behave the way they do, explained in a short, simple essay.It was a post outlining the basics of a theory that needs much work, testing and evaluation. If true, you should have presented it as such. An appropriate title would have indicated your interest in exploring the relationship between evolutionary pressures and human cultures. Instead you declared that you already know "why women and men behave the way they do, "proceeded to string together a series of unproven assertions, and called them facts. Hell, I even said in the title that it was "a short… | /r/MensRights | 22/02/15 01:59 AM |
| – | Why men and women behave the way they do, explained in a short, simple essay.Apparently this thread is being downvoted by people who don't believe in the Theory of Evolution. I hope not. I downvoted this post because you presented an extraordinary claim without providing sufficient supporting evidence. I'd like to think others did too. This is precisely the sort of faux academic nonsense that anti-MRAs expect from us. I thought for a moment that this was a false flag/troll post. | /r/MensRights | 21/02/15 09:18 PM |
| 1 | Arguing with womenShouldn’t we let logic decide if something’s offensive or not, rather than simply deferring to a woman. Ironically nonrational? | /r/MensRights | 09/02/15 08:56 PM |
| 2 | Dads sue New Jersey family court judges, claim 'best interest of the child' standard violates rightsDid you get this: Fathers seeking equal custody have nothing to do with deadbeat parents who try to get away with not taking care of their kids, or abusers who end up fighting CPS to regain "care, custody and control" of their victims. From this?: The fathers contend that parents who are at risk of losing custody should have the same due process rights as those who face possible termination of parental rights due to abuse or neglect, where the extraordinary circumstances test is used. Because th… | /r/MensRights | 06/02/15 12:45 AM |
| – | The internet is full of men who hate feminism. Here's what they're like in person.Yes it does. His point is that a male feminist "mansplaining" feminism would merely be shouted down whereas a male anti-feminist would face violent hatred. Also, Aunt Annie's alligator, A, a, A! | /r/MensRights | 06/02/15 12:37 AM |
| – | The internet is full of men who hate feminism. Here's what they're like in person."Also funny that she said . . ." The author is a man. | /r/MensRights | 05/02/15 09:09 PM |
| – | Dads sue New Jersey family court judges, claim 'best interest of the child' standard violates rightsSo why the hell would anybody would go with "that's MY kid, I want control over it, and the gubmit can't take MAH PROPERTAH" as the basis for a lawsuit? About control: When the plaintiffs' attorneys make the case for "care, custody, and control," they are using language that any family law attorney or jurist will recognize. It is a reference to the rights (e.g., of access) and responsibilities (e.g., physical care and legal decision making) that attend physical and legal custody; think of contro… | /r/MensRights | 05/02/15 02:07 PM |
| – | Sometimes I wonder if this is MensRights or Anti-Feminism. Anyone else?what we need are "Here is an Activity that you, as a Man, can do to help build awareness or make a difference when it comes to your Rights." Ok. | /r/MensRights | 05/02/15 12:43 PM |
| – | Sometimes I wonder if this is MensRights or Anti-Feminism. Anyone else?This is the thread you're looking for. | /r/MensRights | 05/02/15 11:50 AM |
| 2 | Ex-feminists of the MRM, what was the straw that broke the camel's back?Suicide attempt after 4 years of emotional, psychological and physical abuse from me ex. Charged with brandishing a deadly weapon (against myself!) and sent to 52 weeks of domestic violence counseling where I was told it was all my fault and that she is the blameless victim. I was kicked out of every group (all 4) I was put in for refusing to toe the line. | /r/MensRights | 03/02/15 10:07 PM |
| – | Ex-feminists of the MRM, what was the straw that broke the camel's back?The Duluth Model. Specifically, being on the receiving end. | /r/MensRights | 02/02/15 04:55 PM |
| – | That women usually get the children must be a cause for why more women than men file for divorce. Are there studies about this?Is your name ironically grammatically incorrect? | /r/MensRights | 31/01/15 07:25 PM |
| – | Unsupervised parenting time?I think you may be ok here then. If you are unable to work out an informal parenting time agreement with your ex (that is, if she insists on terms--like supervision--that are unacceptable to you), however, you may need to resort to the family court. I think the reason the judge asked you to work it out informally is because courts generally believe that co-parenting functions best when issues like parenting time are not formally contested, but instead negotiated directly by the parents. | /r/MensRights | 31/01/15 10:05 AM |
| 3 | Unsupervised parenting time?I'm not sure I understand your question. I feel like some context is missing. Usually supervised parenting time is required only in instances in which the court feels unsupervised time presents a danger to the child. This is generally the case if the parent to be supervised has a documented history of violence. | /r/MensRights | 31/01/15 09:36 AM |
| – | Video of boys being tricked into catcalling their moms is a hoaxDid anyone really fall for this? | /r/MensRights | 28/01/15 12:58 AM |
| 1 | Increasing custody and decreasing child supportI'm going to side with you on this one. "Committing fraud by failing to declare all your income" is potentially in your son's best interest. Depending on where you live, child support obligations may be so onerous as to leave you bereft of the time and money necessary to properly care for your child during your parenting time. California is notorious for this. Hiding income to correct this imbalance so that you can properly care for your child is most certainly in your child's best interest. Chi… | /r/MensRights | 25/01/15 09:23 AM |
| – | Increasing custody and decreasing child supportI am not an attorney; take the following advice with that in mind. First off, where do you live? In the U.S., child support laws vary from state to state. That said, you should be able to file immediately for a child support hearing based on your change in circumstances. Be forewarned, however, that the court may impute your income based on your past earnings. That is, if you intentionally took a lower income job to avoid paying child support, the court may use an income figure higher than your … | /r/MensRights | 24/01/15 11:23 PM |
| 3 | Female tutor gets 8-25 years for having sex with student. Commetors say it's too harsh.I agree. I've long thought the age of consent is a fairly arbitrary marker of when you are and are not able to make competent decisions. And by "long thought" I mean at least since I was 13 or 14. At the time I thought it ridiculous that I could hypothetically go out and commit a crime and face an entirely different justice system than if I were 18. Now, I understand it is more commonly the case that juveniles are treated as adults in the U.S. criminal justice system, especially for more serious… | /r/MensRights | 24/01/15 10:03 PM |
| – | This thread and is gross misrepresentation of the MRM is currently being upvoted in r/subredditdrama. If you cant beat em, just use logical fallacies!Where are the gay MRAs, the Latino MRAs, the disabled, the bipolar, the poor? Where are the men who are genuinely suffering indignities disproportionately levelled against them-- where are the black MRAs? I'm right here. Need anything? | /r/MensRights | 24/01/15 06:25 PM |
| 1 | Domestic Violence paper. Opinions and suggestionsListen, the hypothesis you stated above--that current domestic violence policies destroy long term relationships that would otherwise survive, and perhaps thrive--is plausible and worthy of testing. It makes intuitive sense; no contact orders put an absolute stop to communication, and in my experience a close relationship does not fare well when all communication breaks down. That paper, however, is terrible. The first two paragraphs comprise sentence after sentence of unproven assertions. With … | /r/MensRights | 20/01/15 07:27 AM |
| 1 | Ex's brother was arrested for domestic violence last nightI will not censure a man for choosing a particular type of relationship. The issue here is not that he was taking care of "used goods" or that he made the "mistake" of cohabiting or some other such thing. The issue is that, at least in California, the Duluth Model is public policy, and women can and do take advantage of it. It is stories like his (false accusation) and like mine (arrested after being driven to the point of suicide by my abuser) that are exactly the reason domestic violence laws … | /r/MensRights | 18/01/15 09:33 PM |
| 1 | Domestic Violence - Asking or opinions and feedback - Pt 1 of 2Yeah. Honestly, I couldn't read the whole thing. Tell your father to reread what he wrote, fix the grammar, and support his arguments with evidence. I mean it about the grammar. It's bad enough to preclude me from taking this seriously. | /r/MensRights | 12/01/15 05:28 AM |
| 1 | The Red Pill Approach to CustodyI strongly suspect that this also works with the courts themselves: that a man who will not beg anything from them carries a great deal more weight than a man who steadfastly believes that adhering to his view of what he ought to be doing will win favour from the courts, despite all the evidence to the contrary and the behaviour of family courts in the past. After all, if he doesn't fight in their arena, their income from him is lost. It's just like men who progressively feminise themselves in a… | /r/MensRights | 05/01/15 02:37 PM |
| 1 | New commentary on the two Scotts: "Advice for Shy Male Nerds"All of that advice misses the point. | /r/MensRights | 05/01/15 01:48 PM |
| – | Prince Andrew sex claims 'emphatically denied' by palaceFwiw, the BBC reported the accuser's name to the extent they were able: The Mail on Sunday has named the woman as Virginia Roberts. The BBC has not been able to verify her identity. | /r/MensRights | 04/01/15 08:43 PM |
| – | More on comment-171-gateSure. But I still feel that this is a false analogy, because feminism is an ideological movement and men are a demographic. Also, feminist ≠ women, and anti-feminist ≠ men. I think the point is that if men shouldn't jump to extremes when characterizing feminism Neither men nor women need jump to extremes when characterizing feminism. Feminists do that well enough on their own. | /r/MensRights | 04/01/15 08:26 PM |
| – | More on comment-171-gateMs. Penny may be right that her ideal feminism doesn’t do that. Then again, my ideal masculinity doesn’t involve rape or sexual harassment. I don't understand how feminism and masculinity are comparable. Feminism is an ideological movement whose adherents consistently demonize men, including (and perhaps especially) those like Scott Aaronson who would otherwise be their allies. Masculinity is the set of attributes associated with the state of being male. Now, if rape and sexual harrassment are a… | /r/MensRights | 04/01/15 06:03 AM |
| – | An open letter to the Two Scotts | on Nerds and EntitlementYes, sexism is real (against both men and women), and yes, gender roles are too rigid (for both men and women), but feminism provides no insight into the actual causes of any of it, and can therefore never provide an effective cure. Yup. Feminists came up with a hypothesis--patriarchy--to explain the problem of gender inequality. They stopped being social scientists and became ideologues when their hypothesis failed under testing and they continued to assert it anyway. | /r/MensRights | 04/01/15 01:10 AM |
| 3 | Stepfather custody rights with a restraining order in californiaI recommend that you request the "pro-se" information from the court. It's "in propina persona" or "in pro per." I recently successfully had a restraining order removed. The determination of violation ultimately rests on the opinion of the particular judge who hears your case, but I would advise absolute caution in obeying the order's terms. Violation in California is a criminal offense that will result in jail time for the restrained party. Even though the complaining witness in my case did not… | /r/MensRights | 03/01/15 01:05 AM |
| – | 'I'm Trying Not To Hate Men'. Because women are the only victims ...Bogart's piece is easy to misread as painting all men as evil. Her essay however, is about how she is struggling--despite her negative personal experiences with some men--not to generalize all men as evil and untrustworthy. The problem with her essay isn't that she is labeling all men as monsters (or potential monsters), but that she feels that only men are perpetrators of violent and abusive acts. As Kate Harding writes, “Of course it’s not all men. The idea that anyone might be talking about a… | /r/MensRights | 01/01/15 06:21 PM |
| 1 | ‘Doonesbury’ and the U-Va. campus-rape stripFTFY (via the washington post comments) | /r/MensRights | 30/12/14 05:57 PM |
| 6 | On Nerd Entitlement (feminist response to "What it’s like being a shy male geek in a feminist world")I'm almost convinced she's deliberately missing the point. She probably isn't deliberately missing the point, but it sure does seem like it. Did you notice her "your woes are not feminism's fault, it's the patriarchy" argument? I feel like Scott could not have made his case in plainer english, but somehow the feminist sexual consent counseling that fueled his anxiety is the fault of patriarchy. Trying to explain the limits of patriarchy theory to a feminist is like trying to convince a religious… | /r/MensRights | 30/12/14 02:37 AM |
| – | What it’s like being a shy male geek in a feminist worldI disagree. His central argument in the comment op linked to is that shy male nerds have been harmed by feminist rhetoric and activism surrounding sexual assault and sexual harassment. | /r/MensRights | 29/12/14 08:12 AM |
| – | What it’s like being a shy male geek in a feminist worldIn calling myself “97% feminist,” I was taking the long, global view of feminism, considering the entire sweep of history from when women were basically chattel animals (as they still are in parts of the world), all the way to the hyper-sensitized, hair-trigger environment of the modern American college campus. And 97% of the progress it took to get there is progress that I don’t merely “support,” but consider one of the main things worth fighting for in the world. Now, if you instead take what … | /r/MensRights | 29/12/14 07:41 AM |
| – | What it’s like being a shy male geek in a feminist worldThat blogger authors many well articulated insights on the linked thread. Here's one: Now, suppose you were always terrible at figuring out fuzzy, unstated social rules that vary from one context to another; suppose your mental abilities lay elsewhere. Can you imagine the terror of knowing that you had to master the byzantine not-quite-rules separating acceptable from unacceptable sexual advances—with lifelong misery awaiting you if you erred in one direction, and social ostracism, self-hatred, … | /r/MensRights | 29/12/14 06:38 AM |
| 12 | Facebook friend flips it around.California here. Khal534 is correct to a point. If she calls the police, then yes, they may ask one of the parties to leave. There is no enforcement power, so either or neither of the parties may opt to leave. It is very easy, however, for a woman to get a restraining order with no evidence other than her word that the man presents a danger to her (thanks, Duluth model). This temporary restraining order will evict you for at least a week, and quite possibly until a restraining order hearing is h… | /r/MensRights | 29/12/14 03:11 AM |
| 1 | Tipping is a MRM issue.Downvote all you like but if tipping is abolished, I'm not interested in a pay cut. | /r/MensRights | 27/12/14 06:32 AM |
| 0 | Tipping is a MRM issue.Yeah sure, abolish tipping. Pay me a salary of $80,000 and I'm down. | /r/MensRights | 27/12/14 05:59 AM |
| 2 | Should men and women be paid the same for doing the same job?Well, that's 2 minutes of my life I'll never get back. | /r/MensRights | 24/12/14 07:15 AM |
| 5 | Idea: Holiday TruceI have not felt [empathy] in this subreddit though. Here you go. And to paraphrase /u/SarcastiCock, please leave and come back only when you've done some research (and while I will not contest your assertion that you are well educated, your comments demonstrate that you need to invest some time learning logical reasoning). | /r/MensRights | 23/12/14 05:22 AM |
| 4 | Idea: Holiday TruceYou'll have to choose between being bitter or being happy and productive. Bitterness is a valid if unfortunate choice. You set these up as the only possible emotional states/utility potentials when others are possible, even if we are restricted to the ones you mention. It is, for example, possible (and common) to simultaneously be horribly bitter and extremely productive. you will never get blood from a stone and you will never get understanding and empathy from a group that has been brutalized … | /r/MensRights | 23/12/14 04:49 AM |
| 4 | Idea: Holiday TruceI'd just point out that trench warfare is serious shit, right up there with the things you mention (if not worse) - and they managed to put it aside for a second and connect. You'll have to choose between being bitter or being happy and productive. Bitterness is a valid if unfortunate choice. False equivalence followed by false dichotomy. Your fluency in fallacious reasoning reminds me of feminist defenses of the issues I mentioned above. Edit: formatting | /r/MensRights | 23/12/14 04:18 AM |
| 6 | Idea: Holiday TruceYeah no. If leading feminist organizations issue a public apology for and advocate against the duluth model, family court bias, and affirmative consent laws, then maybe. | /r/MensRights | 23/12/14 03:17 AM |
| 3 | Suggestion: We figure out roughly how many MRAs are feminist refugees.Former feminist here. | /r/MensRights | 22/12/14 03:20 AM |
| 10 | I prosecuted domestic violence cases, ask awayDo you think Duluth Model programs and their derivatives are effective? Why or why not? | /r/MensRights | 21/12/14 01:47 AM |
| – | Domestic violence policies central to mass incarcerationInteresting hypothesis. I'm not entirely convinced that a causal relationship exists between the rise in U.S. incarceration and draconian, gender biased domestic violence policies, but the article is certainly food for thought. | /r/MensRights | 01/12/14 02:51 AM |
| – | "Women already suffer from an 18.2 per cent gender pay gap and yet we often have to pay more for our workwear," : "We mean business: the real cost of men's and women's workwear"That sounds about right. I have long lamented that women have better inexpensive clothing options than men do. Inexpensive clothing on women can still look very nice. Inexpensive men's clothing just looks cheap, especially when it's formal wear like suits and dress shirts. | /r/MensRights | 29/11/14 08:31 PM |
| 3 | just because you're not hitting someone, doesn't mean you're not benefiting from male privilege and the oppression of women.This is all Duluth Model drivel, and it is infuriating. This is the mindset that underlies policies which separate men from their homes (via restraining orders meted out sans hearing, on a woman's word) and from their children (dv charges are a woman's quickest route to custody). This is precisely what made me an MRA. Outrage indeed. | /r/MensRights | 29/11/14 11:21 AM |
| 5 | NJ Law expands the definition of rapeNope: Earlier this month, state Assemblyman Troy Singleton (D-Burlington) introduced the bill (A3908), which would create the crime of “sexual assault by fraud,” which it defines as “an act of sexual penetration to which a person has given consent because the actor has misrepresented the purpose of the act or has represented he is someone he is not.” This bill proposes to only "protect" (that is, give legal weapons to) women. | /r/MensRights | 25/11/14 07:40 AM |
| 3 | White knight stabbed in SF after confronting vagrant who was harassing him and his girlfriend. Rightly called out by sfgate commenters for needlessly placing himself and his girlfriend in harm's way.I lived in that neighborhood for 10 years. No fallacy here. This guy should know better than to walk across the street and confront someone--in one of the most crime ridden neighborhoods in SF--at 4 in the morning. Or at any time, really. | /r/MensRights | 22/11/14 08:24 AM |
| 9 | 6 Ways That Feminism Insults And Demeans Women While Claiming To Protect ThemVery solid up until the street harassment section. Her error there was saying "women" when what she meant was "white women from a socioeconomic class different from the men who 'harass' them." | /r/MensRights | 22/11/14 08:11 AM |
| 0 | White knight stabbed in SF after confronting vagrant who was harassing him and his girlfriend. Rightly called out by sfgate commenters for needlessly placing himself and his girlfriend in harm's way.It's about the comments. This guy tried to turn his idiocy into a feminist call to action. The commenters aren't buying it. | /r/MensRights | 22/11/14 07:30 AM |
| 5 | I'm in the Navy and we're required to complete domestic violence training every year. This is in one of the sections.This material is from the duluth model. | /r/MensRights | 13/11/14 01:27 AM |
| 1 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".First of all, yes, I probably will retire a server. Secondly, most guests prefer the sexist rituals. At the end of the day, I am there to ensure people have a good time, and if that means serving the ladies first, then that's what I'll do. It is unfortunate that you had that one bad experience (and felt the need to leave no tip, which punishes the support staff in addition to the server you felt deserved nothing), but that suggests to me you had a server who misread, or did not care to read, the… | /r/MensRights | 09/11/14 07:40 AM |
| 2 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".Sadly, yes. | /r/MensRights | 08/11/14 11:27 PM |
| 0 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".It's not that simple. If you are working in a top restaurant where there are plenty of people clamoring for your job, and management says jump, you ask how high. It is not the place where ideological battles are fought, especially when the majority of your clientele want the sexist service. Believe me, I'm with you on this. I now work at a place where I can choose to serve ladies first or not. I'm realistic enough to recognize, however, that a lot of my guests prefer that service standard. I per… | /r/MensRights | 08/11/14 10:46 PM |
| 1 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".Like I said, it's a thing. What's more, the whole ladies first ritual is not always performed at the discretion of the server. Management often requires it. | /r/MensRights | 08/11/14 09:03 PM |
| 2 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".Not only is it annoying for me that there's a presumption that I'm not paying but I also imagine it could be (maybe?) emasculating for my guest for me to take the bill from him. | /r/MensRights | 08/11/14 07:44 PM |
| 1 | It's the guy who is expected to pay and it's the guy that makes unhealthy choices. No, it's sexism towards women of course. "Casual Sexism in Restaurants".I'm a waiter. Sexism is a thing in restaurant service, and it affects both men and women in negative ways. I can explain in more detail if anyone cares, but the original article's argument that gender discrimination exists in restaurants in a way that negatively affects women (and men) is correct. | /r/MensRights | 08/11/14 06:37 PM |
| 1 | With the trend of fathers being treated like second class parents, do you think "My body, my choice" will turn into "My body, my baby"?My lower intestine. Sorry it took so long. I was busy caring for my daughter. | /r/MensRights | 01/11/14 06:16 AM |
| – | With the trend of fathers being treated like second class parents, do you think "My body, my choice" will turn into "My body, my baby"?That has not been my experience, and is absolutely not the way California law works. | /r/MensRights | 30/10/14 12:42 AM |
| – | With the trend of fathers being treated like second class parents, do you think "My body, my choice" will turn into "My body, my baby"?Fair enough. And I'll grant that I've provided no evidence to support my assertion that we are no where near a world in which all biological fathers are required to apply for parental rights. Nevertheless, I suspect that "my body, my baby" only appeals to a small political fringe and is not likely to gain enough traction to become public policy in any western nation. | /r/MensRights | 29/10/14 08:29 PM |
| 2 | With the trend of fathers being treated like second class parents, do you think "My body, my choice" will turn into "My body, my baby"?A link to that paper should be stickied to this subreddit. | /r/MensRights | 29/10/14 07:57 PM |
| – | With the trend of fathers being treated like second class parents, do you think "My body, my choice" will turn into "My body, my baby"?Someone who claimed to represent a feminist organization commented here that their group considered arguing that fathers should be required to apply for parental rights. The argument was premised on the view that ejaculate is a donation to and property of the woman once it enters her body. The commenter said the group rejected the idea. I'm pretty sure western society isn't anywhere close to seriously considering such an idea. Tl;dr: no slippery slope here. | /r/MensRights | 29/10/14 06:12 PM |
| 2 | How do I dismantle the "All of men's problems are caused by misogyny" argument?That's spot on, I can't believe I didn't realize it. | /r/MensRights | 28/10/14 05:03 PM |
| 1 | How do I dismantle the "All of men's problems are caused by misogyny" argument?something strikes me as off about this line of thinking, besides the fact that the Men's Rights Movement generally doesn't talk about nebulous "social norms" like this, but rather actual policy differences that discriminate against men. And there you go. It's not a neat, concise way to counter his argument, but it is nevertheless true. I'd love to see a cogent argument that explains how the Duluth Model--a feminist invention that hurts men--is, in fact, misogyny. Is NOW--the feminist organizatio… | /r/MensRights | 28/10/14 03:59 PM |
| – | It's Game Over for 'Gamers': Anita Sarkeesian on video games' great futureThis woman has lost her damn mind. | /r/MensRights | 28/10/14 03:54 PM |
| 4 | Female on Male Domestic Violence is a Bad Issue for MRAWell, for one I think downvote. Two, the feminist argument that men cannot be victims and that women can only be victims has had a profound influence on both dv and custody laws (at least in the U.S.). You cannot properly address custody issues without acknowledging this, and the problem cannot be resolved without changing public attitudes surrounding gender and dv. | /r/MensRights | 23/10/14 03:28 AM |
| 1 | Forced to apologise for telling the truth about rapeThis article pretty much proves the point both Richard Dawkins and Dan Savage have made: nuance is not allowed in discussions about rape. For these hysterical activists the issue is either black or white, with all shades of grey considered black. | /r/MensRights | 13/10/14 11:23 PM |
| 2 | 15 things all dads of daughters should knowI don't have time right now to explain why, but this listicle is neither harmless nor sjw fluff. I do feel like both feminists (of any stripe) and MRAs can find plenty to condemn in it. Anyway, it was linked to by one of my friends on facebook. I found it outrageous, thus the outrage flair. | /r/MensRights | 10/10/14 08:36 PM |
| 1 | “Gone Girl” mainstreams MRM points and this is the discussion of it we get. The meat is in the comments.It may well be that the author cannot conceive of a bad person who is also a feminist, but I do not see that indicated anywhere in her article. | /r/MensRights | 09/10/14 02:04 PM |
| – | “Gone Girl” mainstreams MRM points and this is the discussion of it we get. The meat is in the comments.Sorry, I'm just not following your logic here. | /r/MensRights | 09/10/14 03:10 AM |
| – | “Gone Girl” mainstreams MRM points and this is the discussion of it we get. The meat is in the comments.She's not a feminist icon except she is? The passage alone has more fans on Goodreads than Malcolm Gladwell. And recently Vulture specifically called out “the cool girl speech” as a prime reason to reread Flynn’s novel OK so it's very popular with feminists who consider it very feminist but....? Bans isn't arguing that Amy Dunne is a feminist icon. She's pointing out that the "cool girl" speech is popular. | /r/MensRights | 08/10/14 09:52 PM |
| – | My University Features This On Their Website, Because Women Never Abuse Men...The infographic is from the Duluth Model, the feminist solution to domestic violence. It's sexist, does not work, and is a huge contributor to bias against men in criminal and family court proceedings. You should request that your university remove it from their website. I don't know enough about the law and how it may be applied, but they might be running up against title ix here. | /r/MensRights | 05/10/14 09:45 PM |
| 3 | Rosen report on how people react to male-on-female vs female-on-male domestic violenceIt's awesome that this is getting so much exposure. I had a co-worker describe this video to me last night, unaware that I knew all about it. I was surprised that he knew (as far as I know, he has no association with men's rights whatsoever). At the same time it seems like the Today crew missed part of the point at the end of the piece when they commended the bystanders for jumping in to help the woman. It's not that aiding a stranger in need isn't commendable, but that the general social instin… | /r/MensRights | 03/10/14 03:17 PM |
| – | "Men's Rights Issues are part of Patriarchy, and feminism fights patriarchy." How do we once and for all reject this argument?Patriarchy is a feminist construction. It is not a useful framework for understanding social inequities. Domestic violence, for example, when viewed through the lens of the patriarchy hypothesis, becomes a problem with only one cause and one solution: men are the problem, and reeducating them is the solution. Ms. West argues: Feminists do not want women to escape prosecution on legitimate domestic violence charges, nor do we want men to be ridiculed for being raped or abused. The idea that women… | /r/MensRights | 02/10/14 06:11 AM |
| – | Wife who killed Los Angeles area mayor releasedFair enough. Edit: what flair then? | /r/MensRights | 01/10/14 03:49 PM |
| 3 | "Was I raped?" Sex columnist Dan Savage discusses 'made to penetrate,' acknowledges the difficulty of initiating a nuanced discussion of sexual assault.Yeah, the end there is where his reasoning fails. But this is still progress. | /r/MensRights | 01/10/14 03:48 PM |
| 4 | "Was I raped?" Sex columnist Dan Savage discusses 'made to penetrate,' acknowledges the difficulty of initiating a nuanced discussion of sexual assault.This: Yes, THROB, "men can be 'made to penetrate' someone against their will," which means a top can be raped. And this: And now... pivoting to my least favorite question ever: "Was I raped?" I hate this question, which I get frequently, because there's only one permissible answer: "Yes, you were." In your case, THROB, it's irrelevant that it didn't feel like rape to you—never mind that you were the one who lived it—and just calling it unpleasant or fraught or traumatizing won't do. Not now. Bec… | /r/MensRights | 01/10/14 07:14 AM |
| 1 | Affirmed consent bill signed by BrownAny illegal recordings cannot be submitted as legal evidence. There are so many times I wished I could record my ex being herself to help me out in court, but such is the law here. | /r/MensRights | 29/09/14 06:38 PM |
| 1 | Affirmed consent bill signed by BrownIn California it is a crime to record someone without their knowledge. | /r/MensRights | 29/09/14 06:32 PM |
| 1 | Can anyone help me articulate a response to this SJW piece?I'm going to assume that every easily disproven feminist trope that the author trots out in this piece--the 1 in 5 rape victim statistic, the gender wage gap, etc.--you've already managed to address, but if not there's this. Aside from the above, her central complaint is that Watson is attempting to enlist male feminists by appealing to their self interest; that is, according to Watson he should be for she because helping she helps he. By selling chivalry to men in this way, the author contends … | /r/MensRights | 27/09/14 04:25 PM |
| – | Woman attempts to avoid parking ticket by driving off with parking officer clinging to her roof. Her defense? Officer sexually harassed her.Also could be flaired "false accusations" and "wtf--really?" | /r/MensRights | 26/09/14 07:43 AM |
| 2 | $1.5m payout for US woman punched by police at roadside. Compensation payments to females always seem a lot higher than those paid to males. This seems quite high to me.I feel like this is an appropriate outcome. If anything the award amount is too low. The U.S. police need this sort of pushback, and they need it more frequently. How often is a police officer made to resign for flagrantly violating the rights of a citizen? It may be true that a man in a similar situation would not see a similar result. The issue, then, is that male victims of police brutality need to be given the same consideration as this woman. EDIT: That officer should be in jail. | /r/MensRights | 25/09/14 05:26 PM |
| 2 | Review: ‘Do Fathers Matter?’ says something new - Published in Washington Post.[Raeburn] firmly points out that there is still far too much anti-father bias in society. For example, a 2012 family law newsletter from the National Organization for Women linked to a website that lists “myths” about family. “Myth” number one was that “a father’s involvement is crucial for the well-being of a child.” Calling out NOW in the Washington Post? Awesome. Sure, it's a book review, but I'll take it. | /r/MensRights | 24/09/14 11:03 AM |
| – | No, Hope Solo Is Not 'Like' Ray RiceYou're seriously deluding yourself if you think that men using violence to control women isn't a historical fact. I never made that argument. I did argue that Coates assumes Rice's violence was premised on a control motive without offering any evidence that Rice was motivated by a desire to control Janay. | /r/MensRights | 23/09/14 09:48 PM |
| 3 | What if we applied feminist logic to other crimes?Nice find demonspawn, and seconded. I feel like there may be an entire legal apparatus whose purpose, in part, is to act as a deterrent to sexual assault and rape. | /r/MensRights | 23/09/14 07:46 PM |
| – | No, Hope Solo Is Not 'Like' Ray RiceTa-Nahisi Coates argues that "the tradition with which Ray Rice will be permanently affiliated" is "spouse-beating" which "is a particularly odious tradition—one often employed by men looking to exert power over women." This is the same failed hypothesis beloved by feminist Duluth Model advocates. Coates advances his claim about Rice without offering any evidence of the power dynamic within the Rice's relationship and despite the fact that the incident in question was an example of bidirectional… | /r/MensRights | 23/09/14 07:39 PM |
| 2 | Are you a custodial parent?But then there's this guy. | /r/MensRights | 22/09/14 04:12 PM |
| 6 | Are you a custodial parent?I am now a custodial parent (50/50 physical and legal). I was drawn to the MRM because of my treatment in both the family and criminal courts. I was seeing slow, incremental success in family court despite encountering bias along the way. Some of the bias came from actors within the system, like the judge who declared the natural place for a young child is with the mother. Some came from legislation passed because of feminist advocacy--for example, the ease with which my ex was able to secure a … | /r/MensRights | 22/09/14 03:54 PM |
| 1 | The Ultimate Dilemma of Feminismthe moment you can say Catholicism is 100% about raping altar boys, or is 100% about any single thing, is the moment you can say "feminism is 100% about demonizing/disenfranchising men at the behest of women". I'm not sure how many of us are arguing that feminism is 100% about demonizing men. I think, from what I've seen, that most of us draw a distinction between radical feminism, which is (in)arguably anti-male, and mainstream feminism, upon which radical feminism has nevertheless had a profou… | /r/MensRights | 15/09/14 11:30 PM |
| – | Technology is sexist because it's not designed specifically for womenSociologist Zeynep Tufekci reported her irritation at not being able to document tear gas use in Turkey because her phone was too big for her to take pictures one-handed. “All my photos from that event are obviously unusable for one simple reason: good smartphones are designed for male hands,” she wrote in a post on Medium, and explained that she couldn't find a smaller phone that met her other requirements. Perhaps she's never heard of the iPhone? An industry leader that no one has ever accused… | /r/MensRights | 15/09/14 01:21 AM |
| 2 | "Are you done crying, yet?"I dealt with almost precisely this situation. My parents have maintained, to this day, a meticulous household, and I provide the same for myself and my daughter. My ex's father is a hoarder (he has so much stuff that he bought additional property to house it all) and her mother isn't particularly neat. Consequentially, my ex does not place any priority on cleanliness. When we were married, this was a constant source of conflict. The messes she would create and leave stressed me out When I asked … | /r/MensRights | 14/09/14 10:22 PM |
| 2 | MHRM and EqualityRight, deleting posts is a terrible idea. I meant more that if the above comment is antithetical to MHRM goals, should MRAs say as much and make it clear that such voices do not represent the movement? | /r/MensRights | 11/09/14 04:31 AM |
| – | Is there a name for this common effect?Association fallacy? | /r/MensRights | 11/09/14 02:28 AM |
| 1 | Should No-Fault Divorce be Abolished?Nope | /r/MensRights | 11/09/14 02:17 AM |
| 1 | "Why Is Everyone So Mad At Ray Rice for Punching His Fiance?" I'm curious what y'all think about this critique of Gender TheoryAh. I'll see to it to recognize my natural role as "protector of women." I'm sure that I'll be an able protector as my maleness completely counterbalances the fact that I stand just shy of 5'8", weigh under 150 pounds, and have no fighting skills to speak of. My Mormon ex mother in-law followed this same line of reasoning when she argued that it was wrong for me to be a stay at home dad while her daughter supported the family. That blogger advances an argument that hurts the MRM's fight for gend… | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 11:46 PM |
| 2 | "Why Is Everyone So Mad At Ray Rice for Punching His Fiance?" I'm curious what y'all think about this critique of Gender TheorySo by critique of gender theory, you mean promotion of socially conservative gender roles backed by specious reasoning. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 08:35 PM |
| 3 | My take on the Ray Rice video...The op's argument is not a justification for Rice's response. I feel like op's argument was that society doesn't take women's violence against men seriously and assumes that men should never hit women. Nobody should ever hit anybody. However, not taking women's violence seriously gives women license to attack. This is dangerous because, as it turns out, some people respond to a physical attack with a counter attack. This is not to justify the counter attack (unless there was no other way to defe… | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 06:18 PM |
| – | My take on the Ray Rice video...Yes, sorry I wasn't clear on that. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 06:08 PM |
| 1 | I submitted this criticism of a salon article on againstmensrights they didn't appreciate it. Thought you mightYou friend, are awesome. Well played. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 05:59 PM |
| 1 | NYT OpEd: Should we pay wages for housework?Um, it doesn't seem that any of the writers argue for paying wages for housework. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 05:55 PM |
| 2 | X-Post from r/feminism "Forcing a girl to wear a non-sexualized suit for dress code violation is sexual harassment! Waah!"1, not a men's rights issue. 2, not sexual harrassment, but harrassment nonetheless. To puritanical sensibilities a problem, I suppose, but it looked like the sort of skirt a girl might be forced to wear at private school. 3, still, not a men's rights issue. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 05:44 PM |
| – | My take on the Ray Rice video...If a small weak man were to walk up to a huge bodybuilder/super strong guy in the street and then start hitting him, can he be pissed off that he hit him back and knocked him out? He is a lot stronger than him, and most likely knows that, so should he refrain from hitting him? I feel this is really similar to the way woman think when talking about men hitting back. This. Ideally, the hypothetical strong man should refrain from hitting back, but ideally, the weaker party should have refrained fro… | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 05:28 PM |
| 1 | Help finding a study for a friendI've got a lot of this stuff memorized at this point. | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 06:09 AM |
| – | Help finding a study for a friendThis? | /r/MensRights | 10/09/14 05:48 AM |
| 0 | [Discrimination] Woman on Askreddit thread purposely opens the door naked to expose herself to a male minor, gets gilded and thousands of upvotes.So, let's see, assuming this story is true, a 14 year old was "exposed" to a woman's breasts. The real issue here is that so many people feel that women's breasts need remain covered when no such proscription exists for men's breasts. Genders swapped and this is a non-story. As is, still a non-story. This is not a men's rights issue. | /r/MensRights | 07/09/14 11:24 PM |
| 16 | Radfems pushing affirmative consent for all male-female physical activities, conflating drunken consent with no consentGreat comment on the op-ed: I am a scholar and teacher of literature, also a lesbian. I have forwarded this article to friends with the title, "How to misread Joyce." Molly Bloom's monologue is an internal soliloquy. Whether or not she verbally said "Yes" to Leopold and when, or if she said it with her eyes or through physical gestures, or whether all of this is a mixture of notoriously misleading memory and fantasy remains unclear. This ambiguity constitutes the essence of the erotic in literat… | /r/MensRights | 07/09/14 05:13 PM |
| 3 | Why don't more men go into teaching?Yeah, I think that's about right. To me it's about income. I wanted to be a teacher, but I didn't want to cut my income in half, so I'm still a waiter. I don't see what's not prestigious about teaching. It's an important job in which you hold immense power and responsibility; you help shape society's future. But yes, the lack of income held me back, as did questions about false allegations of impropriety. There was a teacher in my high school (this is almost 20 years ago now) who was accused of … | /r/MensRights | 07/09/14 04:51 PM |
| 1 | Feminists Attack Bill O'Reilly for Treating Men and Women equally.I can't believe I agree with Bill O'Reilly. I also can't believe that the state department picked a fight with a pundit. The state department. The agency responsible for overseeing American diplomacy. | /r/MensRights | 07/09/14 07:26 AM |
| 1 | Audio of one of my BIP experiencesIt's more or less what all of us here are trying to do. | /r/MensRights | 06/09/14 08:12 AM |
| 1 | New SPLC Intelligence Report on the 'Manosphere' - "Men’s rights activists did not tell Rodger to kill — but in their writings, it seems like many of them wouldn’t mind doing some killing of their ownI feel like some prominent MRAs should write the SPLC and ask for a retraction and an apology. I'm a MRA but I do not "hate women in general." I know that I am not in the minority. EDIT: Never mind. The SPLC doesn't deserve that kind of legitimacy. | /r/MensRights | 04/09/14 10:27 PM |
| 2 | My friend (male) was suspended today for wearing a dress to me PUBLI school because it was "offensive" even though girls are allowed to wear boy clothesGood point. OP can also write to Dan Savage ([email protected]). This sounds like the sort of issue he shines a spotlight on. He's been known to put pressure on school administrators who discriminate like this. | /r/MensRights | 04/09/14 05:45 PM |
| 5 | Audio of one of my BIP experiencesThis is audio from one of the four BIPs from which I've thus far been terminated. The name of the program is ManAlive, and it is a Duluth Model BIP which argues that all violence results from men's male role belief system (i.e., patriarchal beliefs) being challenged. Sorry for the poor quality (and inexplicable zooming on the image). I've never posted to youtube before, but thought I'd get this out there. I'll answer any questions anyone has about this. Edit: Also, to be clear, what I'm doing in… | /r/MensRights | 04/09/14 04:36 AM |
| 2 | SF blogger declares Ray McDonald guilty, calls on 49ers to punish himNobody knows what happened early Sunday morning at McDonald’s house. As Harbaugh said, the facts are still being gathered. According to the police report summary – all SJPD would release is a summary – the victim had visible injuries. So nobody knows what happened, but McDonald should be disciplined anyway. Ann Killion refers to the woman in this case--the complaining witness--as a victim, meaning that McDonald (or someone else) necessarily committed a crime against her. I'm not saying McDonald … | /r/MensRights | 04/09/14 01:21 AM |
| 1 | Park swing controversy: Is this what being a dad in 2014 is like? (follow on from when a dad removed a child from a swing in a park)“At a personal level, I would rather have people — men — being careful and my children being safe, rather than ever having to wonder if there’s something going on. I don’t know if that’s the right position, but that’s what it is.” wtf | /r/MensRights | 03/09/14 05:35 AM |
| 1 | Need some advice re: enforcing visitationMy ex isn't against our daughter going to school, much like she isn't against her going to the doctor when necessary. She just doesn't want to be bothered with arranging it and following through on the commitment. Also I can't take my daughter to any doctor I want on my parenting time, save for an emergency. We have to find consensus on all matters related to the health, education, and welfare of our daughter. My issue with my ex is, despite otherwise desiring our daughter to go to school, and d… | /r/MensRights | 02/09/14 12:42 PM |
| 1 | Need some advice re: enforcing visitationOkay. Perhaps custody works differently in my state, but I am considering seeking full legal custody because my ex has abdicated the responsibilities that come with legal custody. This is quite a separate thing from seeking full physical custody; my daughter would continue to be with us for equal amounts of time, but I would gain the power to do what I've been doing anyway--make and keep medical appointments and enroll her in school. Now, it may be your opinion that preschool is unimportant, but… | /r/MensRights | 02/09/14 03:35 AM |
| 1 | Need some advice re: enforcing visitation1) I didn't have significant physical custody because my ex fought hard to keep me out of our daughter's life, despite my having been our daughter's primary caregiver. 2) It is not that I envision myself as our daughter's favorite parent, it's just really obvious. Our daughter says she wants to live with me every time I see her. She also frequently freaks out and pees herself when it is time to go back to mom. She says she doesn't love her mother and doesn't like "mommy's house." 3) Rather than … | /r/MensRights | 31/08/14 05:00 PM |
| 1 | Need some advice re: enforcing visitationI know I haven't made it plain in this thread, but here it is: this woman is abusive. She has hit our daughter, she used to scream at her for breast feeding the wrong way, she tells her to stop crying because she doesn't want to hear it; recently when I was supposed to pick up my daughter, my ex said she promised to take her swimming, and then turned to our daughter and said, "sorry, you can't go swimming because daddy wants to see you." This woman had primary custody of our daughter for over a … | /r/MensRights | 31/08/14 08:47 AM |
| 3 | Never Forget...we're playing a rigged game against a stacked deck...We will succeed. Success, however, will be slow and incremental. It's foolish to think that several decades of virtually unchecked feminist activism can be undone in short order. | /r/MensRights | 31/08/14 07:56 AM |
| 1 | Need some advice re: enforcing visitationOk everyone, I posted this and then got called into work. But as a sort of general reply, thank you. Also, I understand that this is a better deal than most fathers get, however I do have concerns about my ex's parenting (emotional problems, puts herself before our daughter, etc.), and I want to minimize the time our daughter has to spend in that environment. I'm going to take everything everyone said into consideration and hope for the best. I'm mostly afraid of antagonizing her, but I guess it… | /r/MensRights | 30/08/14 06:20 AM |
| – | UPDATE: My Story about Men's rights and family courtI just read your entire story. Part way through, I started to cry. By the end of part 5, I wanted to throw up. I started to cry again by the end of this post, in public, on a train. Thank you for taking the time to tell your story. I'm sure there are a lot of parents here who can relate to your experience, and learn from it. | /r/MensRights | 29/08/14 05:37 PM |
| – | Hey MensRights! Does anyone have any success stories when it comes to child support/custody agreements?@makhSC, I provided my actual income, and I will contend that at least in CA, the law is unfair. The guideline amount left me with a choice between paying rent, seeing my daughter, or going to jail. I think pursuing a case in court is worth it. In my case, I ran out of money for a lawyer and ended up representing myself. Without my lawyers, I started to win incremental victories. My ex saw that I was slowly winning and decided to give me everything I wanted (50/50 physical and legal custody, no … | /r/MensRights | 28/08/14 08:44 PM |
| 2 | Does anyone understand the Wikipedia editing process/site interaction well? I need help dealing with someone over there regarding a false claim that 86% of domestic violence victims are women.On further review, this will take longer than I thought. That said, I am working on it. Also, what Rahlgo said is correct. These edits need to be done with a view to respecting Wikipedia's rules, or else they will be rejected and the offending editor may be banned. | /r/MensRights | 24/08/14 06:31 AM |
| – | Does anyone understand the Wikipedia editing process/site interaction well? I need help dealing with someone over there regarding a false claim that 86% of domestic violence victims are women.I can help with this. It won't be today, but give me a couple of days and I'm pretty sure I can supply the strategy to make your edits stick. | /r/MensRights | 24/08/14 05:57 AM |
| – | Was this self defenseI am not a lawyer, and so what follows is an amateur analysis and is not legal advice. From a legal standpoint her reaction was self defense, as it was you, by grabbing her arm, who initiated the physical exchange. What you describe is referred to by domestic violence researchers as reciprocal or common couple violence. The criminal justice system may describe it as assault, battery, false imprisonment, child endangerment, and whatever else the DA feels like charging you with. Having said that, … | /r/MensRights | 23/08/14 09:17 PM |
| 1 | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousI think this is going to be my last contribution to this thread, as I am tired and have a couple of long days ahead of me. Several things: 1) Your commitment to this conversation is amazing. 2) It honestly doesn't matter which gender is more at risk. Who is more at risk is not what motivates MRA action on IPV. Our society's tendency to ignore female violence and male victimhood is what's at issue. I would not be an MRA if it weren't for feminism blaming men for all violence (again, I'm referenci… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 07:38 AM |
| – | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousFirst of all, this is not a competition. But solutions to IPV become harder to discover when stats are traded along gendered lines like this. It distracts from the issue and potentially mis-frames it. For example, it is possible that a lot more women die than men because when women initiate violence and men respond, an escalatory back and forth begins which puts the physically weaker party at greater risk of harm. Our findings regarding injury also support this argument; women appeared to have a… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 05:45 AM |
| 1 | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousBut every time I don't specify that in a post regarding DV, someone replies with a comment along the lines of "but men suffer form DV too! How are you not acknowledging that!", listing some statistics, and implying heavily that I'm biased towards women. Without fail. I'm sure I didn't do that. What I did do was contest your declaration that women are without question at a greater risk of IPV (yes, with statistics). I did not imply that you were biased towards women, but I did accuse you of frami… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 05:07 AM |
| – | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousWhat is true, though, is that MRAs see a woman trying to stop domestic violence against women, and assume without thinking that she would not do the same for men. Everything that follows is a straw man argument. | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 03:12 AM |
| – | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousOkay rbbrks, I'm going to suspend disbelief and pretend you're being earnest. But I will also let Murray Straus do the talking: http://pubpages.unh.edu/~mas2/V71-Straus_Thirty-Years-Denying-Evidence-PV_10.pdf And John Hamel et al. too: http://www.domesticviolenceresearch.org/pages/12_page_findings.htm When you levy statements like it's "an absolute fact" that women are more at risk, some of us hear echoes of the Duluth Model in which it is "an absolute fact" that women can only be victims of, an… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 02:07 AM |
| 6 | My biggest question for MRAs: truly curiousFirst, I would like to make clear that I speak for no MRA but myself. That said, I do not get the sense that the MHRM "demonizes women fighting for their rights." I feel that the MHRM is defined by achieving gender equality. While there is a vitriolic minority who appear to "demonize women," the majority, inasmuch as I've observed, strongly critique feminist beliefs and social legislation which discriminate against men. These include, inter alia, domestic violence (you would be disappointed to l… | /r/MensRights | 21/08/14 12:12 AM |
| 4 | Is criticizing feminism any different from criticizing a religion?I feel that agnosticism is best defined by the pithy, "can't know, don't care." Why waste time trying to prove or disprove the unknowable (i.e., god)? This is a separate issue from being able to prove or disprove religious tenets that are knowable. Mormons and Catholics, for example, claimed that gay marriage would harm heterosexual marriage and children, and ran a successful campaign to have their easily disprovable hypotheses inserted into California's constitution. Opposition to the anti-marr… | /r/MensRights | 20/08/14 05:29 AM |
| 2 | Is Amanda Marcotte A Sociopath Who Manipulates Her Audience?Poorly argued. | /r/MensRights | 19/08/14 08:01 PM |
| 4 | EqualityAgnostic.com: Am I dangerous?This is a great little essay. The bit about the women "cross[ing] the street to avoid you" really hit home. These are microagressions, and they can take their toll over time. I am a racial minority, although I "pass" more often than not. I can only imagine that for black men, this is what life is like times a thousand. It is also a reminder of why feminism is so often brought up in this subreddit. What other group has so actively and saliently portrayed men (all men) as potentially violent crimi… | /r/MensRights | 19/08/14 05:45 AM |
| 1 | Gender-Inclusive Power and Control WheelSeconded. Long debunked, and unfortunately, still the heart of DV legislation throughout the states. It's part of what makes custody battles so difficult for men. | /r/MensRights | 16/08/14 09:42 PM |
| 1 | The Modern Day Ducking Stool: Domestic Abuse Programmes and Man ShamingAbsolutely spot on. Words are failing me right now. I can't believe this was written by someone who didn't directly experience the nightmarish combination of losing your children and being told to say it was all your fault or face imprisonment. | /r/MensRights | 16/08/14 07:43 PM |
| 2 | This won’t hurt a bit, Amanda Marcotte@chavelah, you are clearly a different sort of feminist. That is to say, nothing like a feminist as feminists have defined themselves for the past 40 or so years. @The BiboSez2: I dislike feminism, and many feminists as much as the next rational person. We're talking about an ideological hate group that has done me personal harm. I agree with most (if not all) of your essay. I just find the rhetoric highly problematic. I know you are being intentionally inflammatory, but I feel like that strateg… | /r/MensRights | 15/08/14 02:46 AM |
| -2 | This won’t hurt a bit, Amanda MarcotteHow is this productive? No, wait. How is this not counterproductive? | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 06:02 PM |
| 2 | Batterers Intervention Program HomeworkRe 6, that is my interpretation as well. I feel that poor anger management does occasionally lead to emotional or physical violence. The answer they're looking for, however, is that IPV is always a function of power and control (because patriarchy). I understand what you're saying about just playing the game. I've tried (in earnest) to do so and have failed. Part of the issue is that no matter what I actually say, the facilitators fabricate their reports. They all do this, to everyone and not ju… | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 11:54 AM |
| 2 | Batterers Intervention Program HomeworkThe answer to your first question is somewhat complicated, but essentially, I'm really bad at playing the game. I can only lie for so long before I accidentally let the truth slip and wind up the target of a given facilitator. This is not for lack of trying; and yes, I've been remanded to jail for failure to toe the line. Of late, however, probation has been unwilling to jail me again. My attorney has successfully argued that ideological differences violate neither the statute nor my probation t… | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 11:44 AM |
| 2 | Batterers Intervention Program HomeworkI don't think that change will come easily. John Hamel is trying, but one of his colleagues told me that their efforts at fomenting change are generally shouted down at IPV conferences. Female culpability has been documented for decades, with little effect on IPV legislation (which mandates BIPs). I don't know what will create change, but I do know that I will not accept being told things like "all men are socialized to be violent toward women and women are only violent in self defense" or "men … | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 04:19 AM |
| – | Batterers Intervention Program HomeworkGenerally speaking, I'm told I'm argumentative in a way that's counterproductive. I've been terminated from 3 programs so far for poisoning the group. I am now in private counseling, and just recently (with permission) have begun to record the sessions. I'll record tomorrow's class and post his reaction, if you like. | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 04:12 AM |
| – | Batterers Intervention Program HomeworkI know more about BIPs than I ever wanted to know. Being forced into these feminist "re-education programs" (their words, not mine) is part of what led me to the MHRM. I know my contempt for the program is not at all veiled in this posting, but after a year and a half of what was supposed to be 52 weeks of classes, I've grown impatient with the misinformation and blatant misandry so casually tossed about by the "facilitators." They are entitled to their opinions. They may cling to their ideologi… | /r/MensRights | 14/08/14 03:28 AM |
| 2 | Question on division of assets if wife works part time and raises daughter while I'm at workFound this info on Rhode Island alimony: http://www.divorcenet.com/resources/divorce/spousal-support/understanding-and-calculating-alimony-rh Seems like you may be on the hook, but only for a little while. You will also almost certainly pay child support, as that calculation is based on both of your incomes and timeshare. http://www.cse.ri.gov/services/establishment_childsup.php | /r/MensRights | 07/08/14 03:39 PM |
| 1 | Difficulty Editing Domestic Violence Wikipedia PageYes, perhaps. Thank you! | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 11:29 PM |
| 3 | Domestic violence against men - help me out!!Honestly, thank SarcastiCock, who pointed me at that thread earlier today. | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 11:18 PM |
| 4 | Domestic violence against men - help me out!!There's this: http://ajph.aphapublications.org/doi/abs/10.2105/AJPH.2005.079020 And this thread: http://www.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/2c07et/domestic_violence_seeking_references_re_claim/ | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 10:54 PM |
| 2 | Difficulty Editing Domestic Violence Wikipedia PageThanks!! | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 06:01 PM |
| 2 | Child support Tuesday and what you should be doing.Sorry, my post was kind of dickish. I sometimes let the rhetoric get away from me! Good luck to you in your fight. | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 05:35 AM |
| 1 | Child support Tuesday and what you should be doing.I would caution against dispensing advice like "recording calls is legal," because laws on everything from recording conversations to child support vary from state to state. For example, in California--the nation's most populous state--recording conversations is illegal unless both parties are aware the conversation is being recorded. Furthermore, in California, as well as in other states, child support is calculated via formulas whose variables include parenting time and income. The law may aff… | /r/MensRights | 06/08/14 05:03 AM |
| 2 | Seeking advice about a situation regarding ex-wife and custody rightsBy slow, I mean it takes a couple of months from the time you file to be heard. But you may see resolution of your issues fairly quickly (2 months) or it may take a year or more. I feel it's always worth the gamble, but that's up to you. I spent $34,000 in 6 months, but my case was complicated and highly contentious. The California bar association may be able to help you out with an attorney for free or low cost, depending on your income ($100 an hour as opposed to 3 or 4 hundred). You can also … | /r/MensRights | 04/08/14 06:57 PM |
| 0 | Seeking advice about a situation regarding ex-wife and custody rightsIt is true that she can defy the court order, but then you can have the court find her in contempt. The family court does not like its orders to be violated, and I've personally witnessed a mother lose all visitation for doing so. The court also doesn't give much weight to the child's opinion. | /r/MensRights | 04/08/14 06:43 PM |
| 1 | Seeking advice about a situation regarding ex-wife and custody rightsFirstly, I am not a lawyer. You should retain one immediately, at least as an advisor. Having said that: 1) It can be difficult to change physical and legal custody, but not impossible. It sounds like you are seeking only to return to what had been the status quo for the past 14 years. California family courts use the best interests of the child standard, and they generally do not view radical changes to a child's custody (either legal or physical) favorably absent a change in circumstances that… | /r/MensRights | 04/08/14 06:35 PM |
| – | Went looking for a subreddit devoted towards the extradition of deadbeat dads. Found this instead. Do the subscribers in here really believe fathers shouldn't have to pay child support?I feel like there is a spectrum of opinions regarding child support on this subreddit. I personally think that child support and alimony laws need reform. It is one thing to ask a non-custodial parent to contribute financially to the upbringing of their child. It is quite another to calculate that expense at a rate that is either impossible or leaves that parent insolvent (http://www.glennsacks.com/column.php?id=100). Do you think that non-custodial parents should have to pay at a rate that leav… | /r/MensRights | 04/08/14 02:41 PM |
| 1 | I'm finally seeing it.Unbelievable. Are you seeking divorce? If so, head to the family court and file right away. If you need help, there may be resources for you at the courthouse, or they may be able to direct you to some. | /r/MensRights | 02/08/14 05:37 PM |
| 1 | I'm going for full custody, my Monkey means the world to me.Getting an attorney is a good first step. Remember, however, that no one cares about your daughter as much as you do. Help your attorney help you. Be vigilant with respect to court filings, especially with respect to visitation and custody. Be aware of what you lawyer's strategy is and help facilitate it (e.g., by getting witness declarations, making sure your own declarations are strongly written). Say no to your lawyer when necessary, and force them to make requests of the court that they may … | /r/MensRights | 02/08/14 05:24 PM |
| – | I'm finally seeing it.Your mother in-law doesn't have any legal right to your child. Show up at her house (preferably with a friend who can act as a witness), demand your daughter back, and call the police if she refuses. I had this happen to me, and I didn't realize at the time that I had the right to demand my daughter be returned to me. Good luck. | /r/MensRights | 02/08/14 04:55 PM |
| 2 | What have Feminists done to make you dislike them? What are they doing right now that makes you dislike them?No need to feel hopeless. I related the above to express what feminism and feminists have done to hurt me personally (and my daughter; I'll never forgive feminism for the hurt she's suffered). I have had a couple of things work in my favor. One, I have a natural talent for the law (I'm not a lawyer), and was able to handle my case in pro per fairly successfully, which is to say that after 9 months I was able to win two days a week with my daughter. I still had to pay child support and alimony th… | /r/MensRights | 01/08/14 07:37 PM |
| – | What have Feminists done to make you dislike them? What are they doing right now that makes you dislike them?So I'm going to piggyback on the links to research which demonstrates that feminists deliberately suppressed evidence of female perpetrated IPV. But I must also add that the Duluth Model--and especially the patriarchy hypothesis which is it's philosophical foundation--has quite personally harmed me. And by harmed, perhaps what I mean to say is, destroyed my life. When my ex-wife physically attacked me, the police did not take me seriously. When she had a psychotic break and kidnapped our daughte… | /r/MensRights | 01/08/14 05:52 AM |
| 4 | Men of Color suffer disproportionately from violence, poverty and discrimination. Feminist isn't happy with Fed program aimed at improving their situation as it doesn't mention "girls"All of these arguments calling out My Brother's Keeper as unnecessarily racist seem to be premised on the mistaken notion that men of color have equality of opportunity in contemporary American society. Yet opportunity limiting racism, both institutional and societal, is still an unfortunate feature of the American cultural landscape. I think it is already well known that men of color, especially black men, are arrested, prosecuted, and sentenced more severely than white men for drug crimes. And… | /r/MensRights | 31/07/14 04:50 AM |
| 1 | Question: Tips for workers of businesses.I'm a professional server. This is a complex issue which is not reducible to considerations of whether women or men receive more tipped income. In my experience, in some contexts there absolutely is a relationship between gender and tipped income. In others, there is none. In a casual dining restaurant in a conservative cultural climate, young, attractive women are likely to earn more in tips than men. In a fine dining restaurant, this advantage disappears, because charisma, knowledge, and skill… | /r/MensRights | 31/07/14 12:16 AM |
| 1 | We need more voices like this in men's rights. Discussion on socialization of men and the box men are forced into. This is where men's rights and feminism can coexist.Yeah, no. That little pyramid of his at the end in which he claims the socialization of all men is the root of violence against women and that re-education of men will end this violence is the Duluth Model in a nutshell. I've been kicked out of 3 BIPs for rejecting this patriarchy theory based explanation of violence. | /r/MensRights | 28/07/14 07:56 AM |
| 2 | Men's advocacy and political ideologyMRAs are all over the political spectrum because the unifying issues here revolve around gender equality. One can advocate for men and still, for example, be either an economic conservative or liberal (or anywhere on the spectrum). Listen, I am an adamant supporter of men's rights, particularly in the areas that have affected me personally--divorce and domestic violence. I am also a liberal. A San Francisco liberal at that. I believe that capitalism, unfettered, devolves into a social dystopia w… | /r/MensRights | 24/07/14 06:58 AM |
| – | How To Dad! (I like this commercial.)Ironically, supplying your family with peanut butter cheerios immediately calls your parenting wisdom into question. | /r/MensRights | 23/07/14 09:46 PM |
| – | C'mon Disney...WTF is this?The question is, what do we do about it? How do we effectively communicate that this is not okay? | /r/MensRights | 23/07/14 08:17 AM |
| 2 | I fully support the MRM, but I feel this needs to be saidFeminists have a long history, through their activism, of redefining feminism away from gender equality. NOW's activism in the family courts and feminist influence on domestic violence legislation have set up biases in our culture that speak louder than the most shrill tumblr rad fem. We need gender equality advocates, not feminists. | /r/MensRights | 20/07/14 05:35 PM |
| 1 | University lecturer Malcolm James draws a provocative parallel between the modern-day wage gap arguments of Feminists and the Astrarium, the invention of 14th century clockmaker Giovanni de Dondi whoBrilliant read. | /r/MensRights | 20/07/14 07:19 AM |
| 1 | I'm sure it was self defense.From your last comment, it seems to me as if we have difficulty communicating. The point I had been trying to make was that the legal outcome of this case makes no difference from the feminist view. I'll concede that absent familiarity with the feminist gendered conception of IPV, the headline makes little sense. In any instance, I do see that the Duluth Model reference is too oblique, too much of an insider reference for popular comprehension, and hence too easily misinterpreted. | /r/MensRights | 19/07/14 10:28 AM |
| 1 | I'm sure it was self defense.The title is a Duluth Model reference (a means of dealing with IPV that feminists created). One of its cornerstones is that women are only violent in self defense, i.e., in every instance in which a woman chooses violence, she does so as a reaction against patriarchal oppression. Viewed through a feminist frame, a woman who murders a man has done so for no other reason than self defense. I apologize for creating a feminist bullshit editorial headline. | /r/MensRights | 19/07/14 09:42 AM |
| 2 | Walking in public makes me a stalker.I have had trouble dealing with this sort of thing too. The other commenters who say to ignore it are absolutely right, although at first it's difficult to do. I used to avoid sitting next to women like this on the bus, or steer out of their way on the street, but now I do my best to behave as if they were not transparently telegraphing a fear of men. It can be easy to feel that this is not a real phenomenon. At first I questioned it, but I realized that women reacted differently when I walked w… | /r/MensRights | 18/07/14 08:02 PM |
| 1 | Why I’m a Men’s Rights Activist Now - "I am coming out of the closet. Yep. Like many, it took me a long time to come to peace with it, years of soul-searching and introspection."My story is also similar to his. Brilliantly written, but I wish he hadn't referred to his ex as adulterous. True though it might be, the constant reference distracts from the more important issue: the systemic misandry fomented by decades of feminist activism. Again, I completely understand his anger, but attacking his ex in this way (no matter how much she may deserve it) only feeds the feminist MRA critics who dismiss us as bitter divorced men. In this way they frame our anger as hatred again… | /r/MensRights | 18/07/14 07:55 AM |
| – | The 'Criticism' section of the Wikipedia page on the Duluth Model doesn't mention anything about its inherent gender inequality. Can someone more knowledgeable than me about it edit it to include this criticism?O.K. friends, I've made a few edits that I feel talk about the Duluth Model's inherent gender inequality. We'll see if they stick. | /r/MensRights | 16/07/14 12:34 PM |
| 1 | San Francisco Area LawyersI'm not an attorney but I would love to help, if possible. What area of men's rights will the non-profit address? | /r/MensRights | 16/07/14 11:07 AM |
| – | Question: How many of you are disillusioned feminists?I allied myself with feminists until a year and a half ago. My entire life I had been brought up to believe in gender equality. I absorbed those lessons so well that gender equality was (and still is) my default, unconscious assumption. And then my life began to fall apart. After four years of marriage to an emotionally, psychologically, and occasionally physically abusive woman, I asked for a divorce. She responded by going before a judge, declaring that she was afraid of me, and obtaining a re… | /r/MensRights | 11/07/14 02:13 AM |
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