| Upvotes | Title | Category | Author | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 533 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl Trap | STRATEGY | cherrypollen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 26/01/21 11:44 PM |
| 454 | Grieving my former self | LEVEL UP | cherrypollen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 03:39 AM |
| 240 | Always be asking how something benefits you | STRATEGY | cherrypollen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 07/02/21 04:51 AM |
| 73 | As if the OLD bar isn’t already underground... | ROAST-A-SCROTE | cherrypollen | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/03/20 04:06 AM |
| Upvotes | Comment on | Subreddit | Date (UTC) |
|---|---|---|---|
| 17 | Being attracted to something you want to be / feel you're lackingYup. I’ve noticed that I oscillate wildly between types of men I date. But the one constant is that they are usually the exact opposite of whoever I dated before. I’m choosing to sit with these feelings whenever I date someone new to determine if they’re what I actually want or if they’re just different than the man before. Because I’m learning that different often doesn’t mean better. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/22 01:10 AM |
| 3 | Grieving my former selfNo this makes perfect sense, in fact it’s similar to what my therapist told me a few days ago. Even though the difference between my past and present self is stark, I now know what it feels like to be treated the way I deserve, which makes it harder for shitty people to get into my life! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/22 12:58 AM |
| 103 | guys who say they don't know what they are looking for on oldAnd to justify to themselves why they’re not actual trash humans. Leaving the option on the table gives them an out with absolutely zero accountability | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 02:34 AM |
| 63 | Confirmation of Female Dating Strategies + On Shy MenStanding someone up because of shyness? That is some grade A bullshit. Men will always overcome their “shyness” (read: laziness) when they really want someone. I’ve had men who have only ever said 10 words to me ask me out. I’ve had men across the autism spectrum ask me out. And if someone’s “shyness” is so severe that it’s manifesting as anxiety, panic attacks and an inability to function on a basic level then they should be seeking an immediate medical intervention instead of a female attentio… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 02:32 AM |
| 10 | What has been your biggest bullet dodged, and which vetting strategy do you attribute to it?You should absolutely report him to your local housing authority once you leave! He’s a predator and is going to be smarter about the next female tenant he has (ie is afraid of or systemically unable to stand up for herself and her rights). | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 24/02/22 02:19 AM |
| 177 | What has been your biggest bullet dodged, and which vetting strategy do you attribute to it?Girl you need to be documenting all of this! And I don’t know what state you’re in but you should definitely be aware of tenants rights, because I bet a lot of the stuff he’s doing is illegal. Coming into your apartment unannounced when there’s no emergency is for sure illegal, and I’m sure he’s violating a noise ordinance or some kind of decency law by blasting porn in the middle of the night. I’d be calling the cops on him for noise complaints… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/02/22 02:58 AM |
| 12 | More men than ever single? GOOD! Women are finally getting standars and the men are screeching and seethingAnd you know that 99% of them are not at home to be a caretaker lol | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/22 04:04 AM |
| 20 | More men than ever single? GOOD! Women are finally getting standars and the men are screeching and seethingRight?? My college NV boyfriend actively tried to prevent me from getting good grades and succeeding. So did my sisters ex bf. So did my dad. So did many of my friends bfs. And while I’m proud that I turned my life around and graduated with honors, I refuse to let some shitbag take credit for all the hard work I did. The absolute audacity gets me so heated!! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/22 04:03 AM |
| 207 | More men than ever single? GOOD! Women are finally getting standars and the men are screeching and seethingWow 1 in 5 men aged 40-54 still lives with their parents??? That’s 20% of gen x men still living with their parents. What losers. Also saying women are getting degrees to find men is the biggest cope. It doesn’t make sense especially when there are way more women enrolled in college than men. Who thinks a woman attending college is going to take out tens of thousands of dollars in loans to meet men?? When there are multi-billion dollar industries solely dedicated to getting men access to women, … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/01/22 05:26 PM |
| 160 | Is it just me or do men not know how to talk to women anymore? It seems like every conversation involves some sort of pick up artist technique instead of being genuineHas this man ever seen apple juice or an apple before? Because this is clearly orange juice | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/12/21 03:26 AM |
| 5 | Anyone who uses porn is fucking terrible in bed, and it’s time to spread this message far and wideOr they just straight up don’t look at you. I’ve noticed this is the biggest tell— if they’re always trying to get you in doggy or they just bury their face in the pillow, it’s because they’re imagining a porn scene in their heads instead of being present with the person in front of them | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/12/21 10:51 PM |
| 154 | US-based women who are actively dating/in relationships: Protect your wombThey will lie about having a vasectomy. The absolute depravity of men knows no bounds. If a man tells you he’s had a vasectomy, make sure you get verifiable proof | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 02/12/21 04:35 AM |
| 32 | Porn is going to have major implications on the future and no one is talking about itThey literally already say this about onlyfans… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/10/21 12:08 AM |
| 42 | 🙄 There’s literally no pressure on men because the bar is in hellI hate this so much. God forbid I want a ring (that I have to wear everyday) to not turn my hand green or give me a rash. God forbid I want to be proud of a gift my husband got me and show it off. I don’t need some 2 karat gaudy ass ring, but I won’t settle for onion rings, cereal box prize rings, or whatever bullshit trash pickmes say they’re ok with symbolizing their “lifelong” commitment | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 11/04/21 12:29 AM |
| 21 | For those of you looking for signs of him being "Just Not That Into You": this is it!My last “relationship” that pre-FDS me constantly made excuses for scored 18/30... I’m gonna curl up into a ball and die of cringe now | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 23/03/21 03:03 AM |
| 39 | The Empathetic i Am oN yOuR sIdE MaleThis is the message he wants to send to his ex to absolve himself of his guilt, but she either has blocked him or he’s just a coward. He’s all talk and no action but wants to feel like he’s not a complete piece of shit, so he projects this to random women he deems as vulnerable. He does this in hopes that women give him attention and good boy points for meeting the absolute bare-minimum of self-awareness | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/03/21 12:46 AM |
| 16 | Ladies, be kinder to yourselves! We should all have the self esteem of average man.This why I always press X to doubt any man who describes himself as above average looking | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 25/02/21 02:49 AM |
| 23 | Since you joined FDS, what are the ‘pink-flags’ or little LVM behavior you started picking up on that you didn’t notice before or would let slide?I feel like this is less a pink flag and more getting shot in the face with a red flag t-shirt cannon. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/02/21 07:04 AM |
| 5 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapIt’s funny you mention this because I wanted to call this type of guy a Discount Darcy but didn’t think anyone would get it | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 28/01/21 07:30 AM |
| 12 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapI’ve never heard of the goth rebel dream girl! I started college and dating in the late ‘00s and MPDG was THE standard for women. I thought it was starting to die out but I think it’s just evolved into the GRDG or some a sad damaged dream girl (MPDG but with unresolved trauma see Looking for Alaska). Which is honestly worse because it paints mental illness, desperation and/or expectations of dangerous sex as the ultimate ideal. It’s all just so gross. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 07:07 PM |
| 19 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapWow... This response gave me goosebumps. I wish I had something more astute to contribute but you nailed why men like this are so toxic and dangerous. I too wound up in some sketchy situations because I promised myself I wouldn’t fuck things up this time, because all the problems in previous relationship were my fault. I internalized a lot of the confusion and hurt I had and constantly over analyzed what I would do differently the next time. But I just ended up staying with predatory men for WAY… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 06:37 AM |
| 16 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapThis is it. I couldn’t quite capture why admiration bothered me so much but you’re right it is the passiveness that makes it harder to spot. I’m really glad you pointed this out because I just had a galaxy brain moment realizing that so many guys in my life have just wanted to joyride on my journey because it was easy and exciting for them. I’m raging but glad I have a concrete thing I can look out for in the future :) | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 06:23 AM |
| 9 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapYes! I have adhd! | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 06:18 AM |
| 55 | Anyone else pick up Narcissist vibes off of pictures?I will never understand why men think indifference is attractive. I would never want to hang out with someone who doesn’t care about anything. What do you even talk about?? How cool they are? Hard pass from me. I’d be so embarrassed to put any of those kind of photos online. It’s also really trashy IMO | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 02:13 AM |
| 84 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapI’m convinced that us neurodivergents are hyper intuitive because we put so much extra work into understanding basic social cues. But we’ve been put down and gaslit for so long that we constantly doubt ourselves and write off our gut feelings as a situational misunderstanding | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 01:45 AM |
| 45 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapHi. It’s me. The gal who wasn’t diagnosed until I was 28. Even though my mom tried to get me diagnosed for years because she recognized the symptoms because she also has it. I was diagnosed with GAD, BPD and bipolar disorder and it was such a ✨mystery✨ that I had bad reactions to all the drugs they were giving me... I had to find a new doctor and demand a test before I was finally diagnosed I’m continually surprised by all the ways the medical establishment fails women. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 01:42 AM |
| 38 | Neurodivergents & the Manic Pixie Dream Girl TrapWhat? Don’t feel attacked! We’re just being our awesome selves, it’s not our responsibility to feel bad if men project their garbage fantasies on us. Men love novelty, so it makes sense that they’re fascinated by us. And when we pay attention to them and validate them, they think we’re what they’ve been looking for. Or that we’ll give them some kind of spiritual Secret Life of Walter Mitty life fulfillment. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 27/01/21 01:35 AM |
| 30 | Your friendly reminder that unicorn hunting and polyamory are one and the same. Both are bad news for you.I also tried to be cool about polyam even though I wasn’t parktaking in it. And I’ve never felt so objectified by “supposed” friends in my life. It was like a meat market, and they were always begging me to do gross shit with them like “when are you going to join us for a night? You’ll love it I promise.” Or “how do you know you won’t like it if you haven’t tried it?” It was nonstop. People were always trying to plow through my boundaries— which is so hypocritical because they never shut up abou… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 09/01/21 05:20 AM |
| 8 | There’s literally scientific evidence behind why men are more disgusting than womenGod I hate evo psych. Men are gross because we raise them in ways that reward— or at least don’t punish—uncleanliness, laziness, and a lack of accountability or responsibility for their own hygiene. But I guess it’s easier for them to blame it on their ancient ancestors’ hypothesized social behavior (that we have no way to measure or confirm) than having to actually manage their own hygiene. But I can’t believe women are expected to believe that poor hygiene is some XY-only genetic trait, instea… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 06/01/21 12:06 AM |
| 52 | Pacific Northwest LVM starter packThey’re everywhere in Seattle but I know for a fact most of it isn’t ethical like they claim. I have a few friends who dabbled in the ENM community and said it was awful. Women are treated like they’re in a meat market, and most “pairs” have one person who definitely isn’t ok with the dynamic. It’s all selfish, one-sided, and not nearly as ethical as they claim. If it was truly about respect, there wouldn’t be so many women who feel totally disrespected and objectified in that community. But her… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 04/01/21 01:34 AM |
| 258 | Pacific Northwest LVM starter packOh god is this true. It’s only missing “Poly and partnered” and a third trimester beer gut advertised as a “cuddly dad bod” | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 07:25 PM |
| 155 | No thanksWow. This explains everything I hate about living/dating in a progressive big city. I thought dating would be easier because there were more people, but I couldn’t have been more wrong. Peter Pans/ lost boys everywhere and here I am refusing to be their Wendy. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 03/01/21 06:49 PM |
| 6 | Why do men keep insisting that they’re visual and that women don’t care about looks?This is such bullshit. If men were really as visual as they say they are, they wouldn’t be out in public looking like scarecrows who escaped from the root cellar | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 16/12/20 01:47 AM |
| 3 | What are your thoughts on this ladies, would you divorce him?Wtf? I thought the bar was low for men, but I didn’t think being housebroken was something I needed to specify... | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 01/12/20 01:54 AM |
| 28 | 'Before I respect you, I want to know all aspects of you. Let's exchange detailed photos of us physically'. My best friend found this gem in the wild 😂Is anyone actually impressed by this pretentious, overstylized, desperate plea for nudes? | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/20 10:35 PM |
| 27 | Worthiness of men compared to womenUgh don’t even get me started on Knarsgard. I’ve never read such unimportant drivel from a man who thought his boring ass life deserved to be lauded as cool and unique. Or that his apathy towards everyone made him somehow superior. I don’t know if I’ve ever read anything so self-indulgent. He tries so hard to be this Holden Caufield person who waxes poetic à la Proust... And you know he though he was so edgy to call his six part self jerk-off “My Struggle.” The only people I’ve met who actually … | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 20/11/20 10:26 PM |
| 3 | DAE think that the ratio of attractive women to attractive men is truly insane?Haha I had the exact same thought when I moved to Seattle too. I couldn’t figure out why there were no attractive men in a city that big. My sister asked me the same thing when she moved here too. It’s because they’re all tech bros who think cargo shorts and a fleece vest are the pinnacle of fashion and are too lazy to work out or attempt to look nice. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 12/09/20 03:23 AM |
| 30 | The new "trend" dudes have found for themselves (shocker: it revolves around hurting girls)So they’re just showcasing to the world that they literally have nothing else to showcase in their lives other than harassing women on behalf of a celebrity they don’t know? I can guarantee they’re being blocked because they’re annoying, not because women are taking their bullshit to heart. What a bunch of potato looking losers. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 13/08/20 02:17 AM |
| 115 | What common bio phrase you’re tired of seeing on OLD?“Looking for something casual for now, but open to something more if we click” Translation: I want NSA sex on demand but I’ll keep you on the hook while I decide if you’re the best I can get. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 05:12 AM |
| 64 | Do you meet more quality guys compared to east coast?Live on the west coast. Men are still fucking garbage here. They’re just flighty and passive aggressive instead of outwardly arrogant. And honestly so boring. 60% of the men in my city are software engineers, and most other west coast cities have a similar ration. So it’s just smug, libertarian white guys who think women reject them because they’re nerds. When I’m fact it’s because they’re condescending assholes who say they’re “are on the spectrum and don’t understand social norms” as a cope be… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 05:08 AM |
| 14 | This has my head spinning, maybe you ladies can help me get it on straight again.This guy is textbook abuser. He’s love bombing you and preemptively justifying shitty behavior by telling you he has a drug addiction. If you stay he’ll blame every single shitty thing he does on his addiction. Also dumping stuff like that on you super early on is another major red flag. He wants you to feel bad for him and be his savior—I.e. a doormat who never holds him accountable for his behavior but still provides access to a warm hole to fuck on demand because “he’s doing his best, but his… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 04:58 AM |
| 19 | NEVER feel bad for ghosting when your boundaries are violated.I will never feel bad about my boundaries again! At best they’re emotionally stunted, and at worse they’re doing it on purpose and then claim ignorance later. In my 30+ years on this planet, 95% of men are the latter. If they can’t figure out why I ghosted/blocked them, then me trying to explain what boundaries are and why it’s not ok to cross them would be a colossal waste of time. If I wanted to spend my life showing underdeveloped males how to behave I’d be a fucking teacher. Hard pass. Block… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 05/08/20 04:50 AM |
| 38 | Ugh they want us to do everything even planning the dates...I can’t I can’tUgh I hate this. I always get : “I’m new in town, show me around/be my tour guide?” Not only is it SO lazy, it’s like why would I show you all my favorite places and then risk having to see/interact with shitty guys like you? Pay for a tour guide or stop being lazy and venture outside every so often. Instant block whenever I see this. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/07/20 08:12 PM |
| 31 | I’m Dating MyselfSo I’ve also been cooking a lot more, and spoiling myself with some nice baked treats, take myself on dates I like— sometimes order food and get myself some nice wine, sometimes I’ll cook some good picnic food and I have a little picnic and read a book, sometimes do spa pampering in my bathroom. I also bought myself a new set of sheets and basically made my bed a sanctuary of comfort. Next I’ll be looking at redoing my room so that I can better separate my wfh setup from the rest of my space | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 21/07/20 03:36 AM |
| 5 | Relationship Red Flag #647432737: BoredomVery few things annoy me more than this. Men think they’re entitled to your attention or that you should entertain them whenever they feel like it. It’s like don’t you have a job or task you need to attend to? Don’t text me just for the sake of texting hoping I’m going to entertain you because you don’t know how to be alone with your thoughts for 10 minutes. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 10/07/20 09:33 PM |
| 2 | Ladies, we should all leave reddit at the same time and make the news.But their advertisers don’t. Ads are priced and timed based on potential user base views, exposure to ad from user base, user profile and demographics. I have seen plenty of ads here that are not targeted towards your typical male reddit user, who will most likely pull ad dollars from reddit to focus on other places to get impressions from those fitting their consumer profile. As reddit continues to become a cesspool of porn, sexism and racism and receive media attention from it, advertisers wil… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 30/06/20 06:32 PM |
| 17 | Survey: What do you think is the root cause of your Pickmieshaism?I’m sad and angry that this could’ve been written by me, or like 75% of women I know. | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 19/02/20 02:39 AM |
| 8 | What are your dating dealbreakers?No explanation needed dealbreakers: Hygiene issues Predatory Anything right of neolib politically and apolitical people Racism/homophobia Immaturity Fat Bald Boring Uncultured ED/ performance issues Boundary pushing Insufferable poonhoundery Dealbreakers that warrant explanation: Isn’t interested in experiencing new things. I’m always looking to challenge myself and experience new things. I don’t want to spend my valuable free time watching them get drunk and/or play video games all night. Their… | /r/FemaleDatingStrategy | 18/02/20 03:28 AM |
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