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corbast7 Archive

View 6 posts and 4,676 comments by corbast7 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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If a woman uses you for a foodie call, does that make you dirty? Do you feel you’re ruining yourself for your future wife anytime you’ve paid for a woman’s meal and it goes nowhere?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 10:41 AM
3

This just reads like someone’s spiritual psychosis. And I say that as someone who’s into spirituality and astrology and all that.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 03:35 PM
2

They can't compromise on their emotion, they can have duty sex, or they can have nymphopmaniac tendencies which makes them grow appetite while doing it, but still... This idea that communication solves problems or that most problems boil down to miscommunication is a grave mistake. Proper communication gets to the heart of why your needs aren’t aligning, and it should be collaborative and considerate to the other person because nobody likes to feel attacked. Like you don’t just say “gib me more …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 01:49 PM
3

Yeah which is like probably 20 times less than what he expects and 0.75 times what she expects. That doesn’t seem to be based on anything. If the sex frequency is still too low, then it’s something you communicate about to see if you can both be happy with a better compromise. If a happy compromise can’t work, then at the point you’re probably not compatible. Neither person should be miserable. I know a lot about women's reproductive health and I fake feeling concerned :3 "Oh I know you can't di…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 03:10 AM
3

I don’t think that’s true, I think most couples put some amount of effort into keeping their bedroom alive and meeting some minimum frequency that keeps both sides content. But yes if you want to avoid women with lower libido, I think women are also free to avoid men who are careless towards our uterus problems. They have no point in continuing dating if they can’t both be content.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 02:52 AM
2

“Once you selected him, that means he has done his part” does that mean once a woman has selected you, she shouldn’t care to accommodate your higher libido? That’s technically a biological shortcoming too.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 02:35 AM
8

There’s a difference between not being attracted to someone vs thinking you’re superior to them in some social hierarchy. A lot of men here seem to not know the difference between the two because they treat them as one and the same. That seems to be why they obsess over concepts like looksmatches, 1-10 scale, “hoeflation” etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 02:23 AM
2

You’re still describing LTRs as a burden, but you’re just adding that you’re ok with the burden as long as every past man had to go through that same burden. If instead every past man had to “wait” for sex but not you, I’m sure you’d feel differently about that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 11:05 PM
7

I'm not talking about marrying into wealth, but any situation, which is the norm, where are the man makes more, yet both partners get the same lifestyle. Women tend to want men who earn more than them. The biggest reason women make less than their partners is because their earnings go down when they become mothers (on average in the US, women’s long term earnings are cut in half), while fathers just become richer. Childrearing is another kind of feminine coded labor. They may want it, but I don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 05:39 PM
5

If you match hours worked and sectors, there isn't any difference. I specifically said in my comment that feminine coded labor is paid less. If you match sectors and hours worked, there’s still some gender gap due to bias, but it’s just smaller. If you want to get even more specific, the biggest factor that widens the pay gap is when women become mothers, especially because women take more time to do more of the (unpaid, unvalued) work of childrearing and being the primary parent.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:30 PM
5

Most women’s earnings are objectively lower than most men’s…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:12 PM
14

Honestly, I think the main reason why women are paid less is because they know that, if they are straight, there's a good chance that they can expect their male partners to cover a significant part of their lifestyle, In what economy? Maybe women from very rich families could expect that because they’re surrounded by rich men that can afford to be sole breadwinners, but most women can’t afford to hope to marry into wealth. thus decreasing their incentive to aggressively seek raises. Women poll a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:01 PM
37

Those things don’t count! Only women’s hobbies and interests are frivolous, obviously. /s Imo it’s the same mindset behind why society sees feminine coded labor as less deserving of good pay, too: If something is associated with women, then it must be frivolous and useless.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 02:43 PM
3

Lol that’s convenient.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:33 PM
2

I’ve never heard of a parent who doesn’t love their child because they think they’re unattractive. Plenty of men have fallen out of love though.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:28 PM
3

One of those relationships is conditional on physical attraction while the other one isn’t, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:05 PM
1

Makes plenty sense
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:57 PM
3

He sounds so thoughtful! Love that for you
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:42 PM
17

Cold approaching is not the only way to approach. Most women meet their partners from warm approach, as in they’re already acquaintances, they’re friends of friends, etc. Which is way better for women anyway, because there’s usually already some pre-vetting done.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:14 PM
2

From what I’ve heard from my widowed mom who spends time in widow groups, I’d say so. I think people just expect men to do it because men want sex or a nurse/maid, so a woman doing it is more taboo. I’ve heard more people assume a woman didn’t love her husband enough if she decides to date again.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:41 PM
5

I think it’s just based on the dumb belief that women are supposed to automatically want any man that’s their “looksmatch” or above, like that’s all there is to attraction, chemistry, or compatibility. So a woman saying no can be very offensive to men with that worldview, so long as he thinks he’s superior in the social hierarchy to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:36 PM
5

Damn I’m sorry. It doesn’t surprise me at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:31 PM
15

Men on here have literally made posts about this, shaming average and below average women for rejecting any random man, as if they think those women should be free use or some shit. Only Stacy has the right to say no!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:18 PM
8

Conventional masculinity is actually relatively polarizing to women, and there’s been studies on this to back this up. A lot of women will find a guy who’s hypermasculine to seem unfriendly and will want to avoid him, while other women may be into it. I think men with a good mix of masculine and feminine traits tend to have the widest appeal to women, all else being equal.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:06 PM
1

Yes you can couch co-op! My partner and I really enjoy it, I love all the fantasy and sci fi elements and it’s very casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:57 PM
3

Of course a woman has a better chance of getting a yes, because a decent portion of those men would be interested in at least the hope of having sex, without much care if the relationship goes anywhere. That’s pretty undesirable to most women; you need to consider risk vs reward in how people decide how to conduct themselves. So yes a woman is more likely to reject you up front, but that also means a woman saying yes is more likely to be genuinely interested in you. There’s less ambiguity in wom…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:55 PM
3

This is like when some men call Margot Robbie or Taylor Swift mid
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:47 PM
2

Split Fiction is really cool
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:33 PM
1

Kink keeps things novel in the same way we also like to eat new exotic foods for novelty. Idk why this is so upsetting to you, to the point where you’re now making weird racist accusation towards me lol. I also like your assumption that sexual fantasies only come from men, as if women aren’t also sexually autonomous beings with our own fantasies in our own privacy. If you like very vanilla sex or if you have a very limited palate in your diet etc., I have nothing against you. You can find someon…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:47 AM
1

Feel better about what exactly? It makes our sex life fun and novel.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:49 AM
2

I don’t agree that the man is/should be “better” because that’s a very vague value judgement, but I do think it’s better if he brings more “usefulness” to the woman (money is one type of usefulness), because that’s something women care about more, which makes sense especially if she plans to get pregnant with him someday. Women face a lot more risk if the man is less useful than herself. And then I feel like men are more likely to get resentful if they think they mog their gf/wife physically, so…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:46 AM
1

Um yes? Kinky sex with my partner is not degrading lol. He still treats me with respect and care outside of the bedroom too.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:36 AM
5

Tbh I think the highest success couples are the ones where the woman is just slightly better looking and the man is slightly more “successful” or “useful.”Because then both get their higher priority fulfilled, and they’re both more likely to feel like it’s a win-win situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:34 AM
1

Are you degrading your wife if you talk dirty to her in bed?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:28 AM
3

It is, but unsurprisingly ppd men in the comments don’t see the value in building rapport and respect in a public social environment. Some men can be amazing at cockblocking themselves because they’re so aggro.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:23 AM
1

You know couples often do dirty talk too? It’s not degrading unless someone talks to you like that outside the bedroom. Sex is usually a place for fantasy and role play.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:17 AM
5

I don’t see any real issue with the first situation. Someone putting pressure on me though by aggressively approaching me or putting me on the spot is what makes me feel uncomfortable being somewhere, and feels like I’m backed into a corner. I do get why a lot of women feel on guard in general after just a few bad interactions.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:13 AM
2

How is a woman uniquely “degraded”during sex, unless it were non consensual? Makes no sense to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:05 AM
1

I’m saying that consensual sex is not somehow more degrading to a woman than it is to a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:59 PM
7

Ok but what’s the peerage? Hopefully not you both being single and struggling. That sounds like a shallow friendship.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:40 PM
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Me neither but clearly that guy has something to hide if being posted by a gf is a dealbreaker.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 10:17 PM
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Yes I get that, but explicitly drawing a line between being married and not married sounds like he wants people on social media to think he’s single even if he’s dating someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 10:15 PM
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Tbh it is very Sigma male of him to tell a woman it’s a dealbreaker if she posts evidence that they’re dating. I’m too inferior to have even recognized his high value.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 10:12 PM
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A man who’s cheating on you is not a trophy husband, women literally find it embarrassing. Maybe he was a trophy before the cheating, but after that it becomes shameful. You’re likely not a woman though so I’m sure you just don’t get it. The only options for ego preservation a woman would have (if she doesn’t leave) is to either stay with him for his money, or start cheating herself. Or do both.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:57 PM
8

Do you not have other things in common with this friend that keep you emotionally close? Why are you making it sound like you only have this “friend” in the hopes that their successes will rub off on you, like you’re doing LinkedIn networking or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:46 PM
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Some women are successful in getting happy marriages and some aren’t 🤷‍♀️
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:37 PM
–

It’s not an “achievement” to be cheated on by your man, other women see it as embarrassing. It only might make sense to stay if the dude is has money, but even then it’s still a pitiful situation. The real achievement (in the eyes of other women at least) is a man who dotes on his woman and keeps her cortisol low.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:23 PM
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I’ve seen some guys say that when a woman stays with a cheater it means she’s truly in love lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:10 PM
–

Cheater vibes for sure
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:03 PM
–

The alleged faithful wife who stays is really only staying for the money and lifestyle benefits, and probably also cheating in secret.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 09:01 PM
–

I’m sure it actually depends on what the person is even complaining about.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 08:54 PM
–

Wearing my hair up is uncomfortable because it holds tension on the hair, it makes my ears cold, and it’s fussier to make it nice looking and not sloppy. It being uncomfy is the main reason. I wear my hair up at work because I have to, and I’m always so relieved when I get to take my hair down. The only other time I wear it up is if my hair is too dirty and I’m trying to hide the evidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 07:17 PM
–

You don’t need to be conventionally really pretty to be worthy of being treated kindly. Pretty women get treated badly in relationships too. Don’t fall for that trap because there will never be a “pretty enough” that will finally make you feel “worthy.” It’s all about the man’s character, and bad men look for women they think are easy targets. You know why? Because they know a woman’s presence holds value, and they’ll try to exploit that by taking advantage of your low self esteem. A bad man wil…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 06:30 PM
1

We find certain behaviors attractive or unattractive because we’ve moralized them. It’s usually unconscious because we learn them from culture. Men don’t care about bisexuality in women because they often hope it means they can have a threesome, and they’re not as sexually threatened by other women because women’s bisexuality is usually seen as secretly straight / preferring men. Bi men in turn get seen as secretly gay / preferring men. Men who hate n high count women literally claim that those …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:39 PM
2

I’m giving you the historical context for why it’s a common cultural belief in many places. I’m not claiming that most westerners are devoted to religion. And if liking lower n were just simply about seeing it as an objectively “better” trait, then it wouldn’t get treated like a double standard by many sexist men. Men would moralize against other men for having high n as much as they do women. But since there’s a lot of sexism involved, reality doesn’t play out like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:23 PM
2

But what if someone’s had very few partners, but has been in very long relationships? Being in long relationships can give you a lot of life experience, but other people might call that low experience. At least with politics it’s more understood when you give yourself a label, because people love political labels. People should have the option to write a short little blurb about their politics if they want, like for example if someone wants to distinguish themselves as a leftist and not a libera…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:56 PM
1

Most people in western countries are not hyper religious let alone follow every single “rule” in their religious book to a T. People tend to pick and choose which things they agree with and which things they don’t all the time. And considering that the most popular religions are patriarchal, they usually give men more moral freedom and leeway to repent: Women are usually seen as the arbiters of morality that need to strictly adhere to being moral “role models”, for children’s sake. I don’t see h…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:51 PM
3

I’m just pointing out that your comment supports when some women say “a man will pay if he actually likes you, so I only will keep dating a man if he pays.”
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:41 PM
4

What does “medium” or “high” even mean though? Seems like a useless question, I wouldn’t even know how to answer it. It makes more sense to just say what you want about your experience on your profile, or just organically talk about your past relationship experiences once you’re actually talking to someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:22 PM
3

People who are fat don’t want to be fat; it’s notoriously difficult to change your eating habits, exercise consistently, etc. I don’t fault anyone for being attracted to thin/fit people. It’s a wealth signal more than anything else. Those men don’t get high n counts by accident or misfortune, and they do it for fun. If a man thinks that fun is good when men have it but bad when women have it, that tells you all you need to know about how he views women. It’s no coincidence that it lines up with …
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:19 PM
1

A high n man wanting a low n woman is communicating that he thinks sex is degrading when women have it, but empowering when men have it. Those are obvious moral judgements in that double standard, and there’s no getting around how misogynistic and gross it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:05 PM
1

Height or extroversion are not rooted in morality like how people usually view n count. You’re “allowed” to want whatever you want, but people can still have opinions on what those things say about you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:42 PM
2

Aren’t you just saying that you’ll pay only if you like the woman? You don’t see what women can take away from that comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:38 PM
4

That argument is just about deterring a certain kind of man. I don’t think having my meal always paid for is worth having to deal with that nonsense, and it’s not a hassle for me to pay for my food anyway. I also don’t think a woman is a tease or a gold digger for accepting a paid meal in its own right as a kind gesture, either. That kind of risk assessment is up to you. Also offering to split on a first date to me has the double advantage of deterring men who see you as a prostitute, and also s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:11 PM
5

Bear’s entitlement was made pretty obvious when he finally hears real Nikki’s voice trapped in her body for the first time, asking to die, and his first thought is to say “what’s so bad about being with me?” and then walks out while she’s pleading to die. He didn’t give af about her suffering, he was only upset that his wish didn’t go his way. Nowhere in the movie is there any reference to BPD…They made it very clear that Nikki’s body was possessed.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:14 AM
1

Men have to be knowledgeable about which women are likely to sleep with him as well as which women would be romantically interested and compatible for a LTR. Men can’t just date any random woman they want just like they can’t casually fuck any random woman they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:05 AM
1

I’m saying that the men who are jealous are the ones who have that particular mindset, as in they see relationships as a “hassle” as you put it. Yes there’s more men with that mindset than there are women, but it’s still a subjective opinion that doesn’t apply to most men. Like how the top comment was saying, you can’t convince someone who doesn’t value relationships / marriage / settling down with a family to think those things are more valuable than casual sex. Those people are just different.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:03 AM
1

Sure, but I think men finding casual sex is about being in the right environment + right time, and having certain personality traits (extroverted, low inhibition / low disgust). There are a LOT of women open to casual at any point in time, even if they’re not the majority. It’s just not about the guy being really hot or a “top tier” or whatever man, like OP says. In that sense it is less common for most men to find it, but it’s not based on some objective social value. It’s only “valued” in the …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:42 PM
2

Everyone has a different conflict style, I definitely freeze up and can stonewall at my worst. When words aren’t good enough though the only thing that seems to work in amending things is holding hands! Even if I can only do it while we sit in silence or if I need to cry. I’ve told my partner after an argument once that I appreciate him just sitting with me and holding my hand instead of leaving me alone, and that it helps me feel closer to him while I process things. So now he just knows to do …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:26 PM
1

Hypergamy 😔
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:18 PM
1

Phone call is definitely the worst one. You can’t compose your thoughts and you can’t use physical closeness. I’d rather take some time to myself to get my thoughts together in a notes app at least, and then also get to talk irl because irl is the best way to make amends. Also I’ve found it’s really helpful to hold the other person’s hand if you’re having a hard conversation or it’s just hard to talk. It softens both of us, even when I’m mad and having trouble with giving eye contact.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:09 PM
6

“Pay for something others got for free” I mean just say that you think LTRs are a burden and that you put casual sex on a pedestal. That’s the only way this mindset ever makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 09:37 PM
4

Oh yeah sure dude, women famously would love to date conservative men as long as those conservative men want LTRs with us…Women only dislike conservative men because they’re prudish /s
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 09:31 PM
4

And if she says a number you like, and then you move forward with the relationship after pretending to be progressive? Then the relationship is still built on lies anyway. Surely the relationship will go well down the line /s
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 09:28 PM
-5

You probably have to know how to pick the right kind of stranger who’d likely agree to that. Just like I’m sure you didn’t pick your gf at random, either. Unless you think you can get any random stranger to agree to be in a serious relationship with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:47 PM
-3

You’re comparing someone agreeing to bang you as a stranger within a few hours vs someone agreeing to keep seeing you more seriously after multiple dates together. Of course they’re not the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:33 PM
-7

Did it also take just a couple hours for your gf to say she wants a serious relationship with you..?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:09 PM
6

And if you thought women didn’t care about politics then you wouldn’t try to hide what you believe…idk how this is hard for you to see the direct comparison lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:04 PM
5

You’re speaking as a man who thinks politics don’t matter in dating because it doesn’t threaten you. A lot of women, especially of the younger gen, care a lot about political compatibility because of how it more directly impacts us. A woman willing to lie to you probably tells herself the same thing because she doesn’t care about it. It’s no big deal to her, so what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:58 PM
6

And you clearly have to lie about your values to get a woman to trust you in return, and trust is something people want in their committed relationships too. You are the male equivalent of the kind of woman you dislike.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:35 PM
6

You’re faking compatibility by pretending to have progressive views that presumably match hers. It’s literally the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:45 PM
9

Tbf if there’s men willing to lie about their values and beliefs to get closer to women, they kinda deserve the women who are also willing to lie about themselves too.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:29 PM
9

You’d have to convince most men that the chance of having sex isn’t worth approaching, and good luck with that. You even have men in this sub talking about how they’re willing to pick up their entire lives and move to poorer countries just because they know their wealthier background will give them a boost in competing for pretty women. There’s no shortage of men willing to do a lot for the chance of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 05:28 PM
5

That’s literally just a chicken and egg. Men being hornier and having less to lose / more to gain if the relationship only stays casual, leads to men doing more of the approaching and therefore women having more sexual suitors. And vice versa. Women have to learn to vet and be stingy and cautious if they want to avoid the men who would be happy to only be with them for sex, because the cost-benefit analysis is different for most women.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 04:52 PM
4

Men do it more because they’re simply more motivated to. Men are more often attracted to random women (and are already open to sex) at first sight than women are to men. The cost-benefit analysis for men and women is just not the same. That’s why for example when a man ever is talking to a woman, he’s never worried about if she only wants casual sex from him. Even just the chance of sex, with the relationship going nowhere, is seen as a life improvement to most single men. Most women don’t feel …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 04:31 PM
1

Maybe you don’t see it because that pairing is not as common? The only celebrity example I can even think of is Madonna, and I’ve seen her get a lot of flack for being weird/creepy. It is on brand for her though, like it is for the kind of guys that tend to pursue age gaps.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:57 AM
2

Just because I’d judge some people for how they vote doesn’t mean I think it should be illegal for them to vote.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:43 AM
5

Having sex and relationships with other people before you met your partner has nothing to do with them. Because you didn’t even know them to be able to choose them. Usually when anyone really likes someone, they want to lock them down forever in an exclusive relationship. Promising exclusivity to each other is kind of the whole point of monogamy.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:39 AM
2

How is seeing women as objects to be conquered not misogynistic? Seeing consensual sex as something that socially only ruins women shows that women are uniquely not respected as being able to have agency. Can only speak for myself though. I don’t agree that sex “ruins” anyone but I can appreciate that you’re not a hypocrite.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:25 AM
2

Yes, you get more chances at avoiding that. I’ve never heard of men getting drunk as being more stigmatized than a woman getting drunk. And that's similar to the reason why it's not fucking same, n count is a social construct and depends on other's perception which in turn shapes individual preferences. It sounds then that the common denominator of that double standard is that it comes from misogyny. If a high n man thinks similar high n women are socially beneath him because he “conquered” the …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:05 AM
3

You’d feel guilty about it yet you’re arguing that “it’s different”? So then clearly it’s not meaningfully different then… Idk why you keep bringing up “effort” like that’s supposed to mean anything or translate to a different outcome. Men technically have an easier time handling alcohol than women can, does that mean it’s worse to you if a man gets drunk? It's not even different, most men won't care if their wife has 50 women. Most women would care if their bf has slept with 50 men. Because sex…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 11:31 PM
5

It’s “not the same” yet most low n women still judge high n men for it. If you “need” lots of casual sex then don’t be surprised if women who see intimacy differently don’t see you as trustworthy.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 10:58 PM
3

What does it matter that it’s easier for women to find sex partners? Like women are supposed to admire you for it? It’s other struggling men who admire it and are jealous. A “high” n count is a moralized topic, which is evidenced by the fact that most men and women see it as a negative trait in a partner. It makes sense since most people are not high n. It’d be like a heavy drinker saying they only want to date someone who’s never been drunk; drinking too much is also moralized.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 10:51 PM
1

I don’t even know, I don’t regularly ask people’s n counts. I’d probably assume by vibes.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 09:36 PM
2

It also explains why these guys get mad at women for being more selective.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 09:32 PM
3

N count is not a dimorphic trait.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 09:30 PM
3

You do realize that even “older” women are still younger than other men older and richer than themselves? If she really wanted to latch onto an older man (and his wealth), they’re always out there and available. With that said, what I’ve observed with the people who tend to pursue much younger partners, is that they’re more maverick/unstable types. The younger person may or may not fit that profile, which is why they’re not stigmatized as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 09:25 PM
1

Tall/short are more clearly defined though because the average height in a country is a concrete measurement. And people use rich/poor mostly relative to themselves; if you can afford more than someone, then they obviously consider you richer. Money has a concrete value. Judging most people’s faces just has a lot more subjectivity to it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 05:15 PM
2

But most people have some unique mixture of good and bad and neutral features. So if anyone likes the specific combination of features someone has and finds them attractive, they’ll rate them higher. And then on top of that the number scale doesn’t even mean anything specific because you can’t define an average unless you’ve defined your population…someone who’s considered “average” by people in LA or NY will probably get different ratings if they ask someone who lives somewhere else. You can’t …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:35 AM
1

He was so unhinged, I miss him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 10:15 PM
–

Men’s BMI and bodyfat% preference in women does not line up with what men judge as most healthy or most fertile. “To sum up, the existing evidence suggests that BMI does relate to health in many ways, where normal weight might be most protective. However, low BMIs, which are preferred by men in well-nourished populations, are linked to relatively higher mortality rates (Aune et al., 2016; Di Angelantonio et al., 2016) and poor health (Lassek & Gaulin, 2018a), not only in subsistence population b…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:47 PM
–

TRM will never be consistent because there will always be subjectivity in what faces we find attractive. There’s too many variables in people’s combined facial features, and which features are considered beautiful are also influenced by demographics.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:27 PM
2

His new eyes and cheeks look a little uncanny to me. Personally I think the whole “hunter eyes” obsession is really overrated, and his cheeks are kinda giving handsome squidward.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 05:27 PM
2

They will still blame you if you become more cautious, wait to have sex to weed out unserious men, etc. You should’ve been born psychic, obviously.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:48 PM
1

Her point is that it’s hard for women to feel spontaneously horny for someone they feel resentful towards (because you share the space), or someone they think is gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:43 PM
1

Yeah sure, good luck with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:46 PM
1

People cheat when they’re unsatisfied with a relationship but are too cowardly to actually end it, for whatever reason. Stability is very enticing. I think women are more likely to just be confrontational or break up when unsatisfied than they are to cheat, compared to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:42 PM
1

Right sure. So in other words women don’t really love you unless they’re willing to let you cheat on them. Did you have any healthy stable relationships modeled for you growing up?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:33 PM
0

Why are you just assuming men only cheat because their wives put them in a dead bedroom, like you’re trying to morally justify men cheating? What about all the men who lose attraction to their wives for aging, their bodies changing after childbirth, and not being as fun and carefree anymore like they were when they were younger? Betraying your partner is never morally justified.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:24 PM
1

Of course sex is personal in a monogamous relationship, which is why everyone feels hurt when they’re sexually betrayed in said monogamous relationship. If you didn’t believe that were true, then you would get no pushback if you were to proposition women for one-sided non-monogamy lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 05:18 PM
1

Why don’t you believe that cheating women love their husbands?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:48 PM
0

Men and women cheat at about the same rate when under age 30, but men cheat more and at a growing disparity with age. So that’s more applicable to couples who are married / have kids together.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:42 PM
1

Marrying a formerly promiscuous man does not somehow remove risk for women though..? Especially when men who want “a legacy” are not interested in being a present parent. And technically promiscuous people are even more likely to cheat than people who were never promiscuous. Also men cheating doesn’t mean in anyway he doesn’t love you. This is female projection. Since women can’t comprehend cheating and still being fully in love. Truly a hilarious statement. Why would I listen to what men say (w…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:40 PM
3

Freedom to not reproduce doesn’t punish anyone. The economy can just adapt, but the people in power don’t want that because they want infinite growth. Do you have this same vitriol for childfree men? And why would you assume that countries with less rights are going to “take over”? How? Birth rates are dropping pretty much everywhere now btw.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 04:32 PM
12

Ayooo. Perfect comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:51 PM
1

If we go by cheating statistics, it’s more likely that the husband is going to cheat on his wife than the other way around. And it’s not just women who can want relationships for security and a future, men also frequently state in their own words that they want “a legacy” (i.e bio children that they may or may not want to parent) and they need a stable woman to make that happen. It goes both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:49 PM
1

No it truly does go both ways. Men can stand to benefit from having a loyal, stable “wife material” woman who’ll birth and raise his kids because he wants “a legacy”, and then he can eventually go on to cheat with childless women who are more fun. And mind you, men do cheat more in marriages than women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:37 PM
5

Idk what you’re referencing in my comment. Edit: oh nvm it sounds like you’re agreeing with my second paragraph.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:04 PM
8

Why do you make the assumption that relationships start out with little/no desire? Like for example it’s pretty well documented that people tend to physically let themselves go in LTRs and marriages. People get comfortable and so they naturally put less effort into maintenance. For some reason ppd men believe there’s an epidemic of women picking men they’re hardly attracted to, but at the same time believe women are too picky on dating apps about the men they want to date, and it’s keeping men s…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:00 PM
4

Yeah being in love tends to make you see your partner that way. Very crazy indeed.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 09:06 PM
2

Why would they not matter if the point of contention is justifying what makes sense for people to think is hypocritical? Height is a dimorphic physical trait while n count is not. Like nobody gets mad at men for liking women with curves and big boobs, despite men not being curvy and having big boobs themselves. It’s the dimorphic extreme that they’re attracted to. Another one (which is actually a real one women get mad about) is older men preferring younger women even though they're not young th…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 08:55 PM
2

that being said, n count is not a sexually dimorphic trait in the same way height is. so it’s not really the best comparison. Another reason it was never a good comparison is because n count standards are treated as a moral standard while height standards aren’t. And a “high” n count in the opposite sex is generally seen as negative by both men and women. Edit to also say, it seems there’s plenty of tall men that actively prefer short women too. Getting mad at a short woman preferring tall men i…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 04:59 PM
2

I agree that preferences are worth examining both in yourself and also in a larger culture, because we’re still very social creatures that are impacted by cultural ideals. Like that’s why positive representation in media is so impactful and important for example. It’s really the best example I can think of that actually influences people, and we should encourage more diverse media for people to see themselves represented in. I just think people start to take it too far when they actually attack …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 04:43 PM
1

It’s a retro vibe trend and I can see the appeal, but it’s not my cup of tea personally. I prefer it paired with a little bit of beard, and trimmed short and tidy.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 04:25 PM
3

From how I’ve seen friends pick guys for hook ups vs relationships, the looks bar doesn’t change. For hook ups they just lower the bar for how much they like the guy / place behavior expectations on him. And I’ve only ever seen them catch feelings if the guy maybe starts to exceed those expectations.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 11:42 PM
3

Most women, especially of his generation, are not leftists/anti-imperialists let alone doing much vetting on political beliefs. He will have at the very least attracted women who don’t take politics that seriously. And if decency is a “neutral” trait to you, then you should expect that the women willing to associate with you will have the same standard for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 09:43 PM
3

With that attitude about morals, I’m sure you’ll attract questionable people too.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:48 PM
8

If you’re treating any female attention as good attention (as if women are all the same, but only when women are “bad”), and to the point where you’re saying “having a nazi tattoo will give me the results I want”, then I think you (general) already have some very questionable beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:39 PM
3

Yes because he was a reformed nazi / right winger. But also just because someone adopts leftist working class politics doesn’t mean they’re incapable of being misogynistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:05 PM
11

Assortative mating dictates that people with similar traits and backgrounds tend to pair up with each other. Decency is not necessary if you’re indiscriminate about the women you’ll spend time with like having “a hole is a goal” mindset, but it is necessary if you want decency in a partner. Someone who’s already a “good” person isn’t looking for excuses for why they shouldn’t have to be good. They’re putting on an act.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 08:01 PM
7

I know who he is. I’m responding to the premise that decency doesn’t matter in dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 07:44 PM
14

Ok then go through your life like an asshole and tell us if you like and respect the quality of the people you attract. Because time and time again, every red pilled asshole strangely hates the women they attract and are still super jaded about dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 07:26 PM
2

So do you agree with pink pillers when they say a man who truly desires them will do everything for them no matter how the woman acts? Because that’s the gender flipped version of what you’re saying. “Why should I be likeable when he’d bend over backwards for a woman he really wants”
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 07:13 PM
6

You think women are fretting over not doing specific porn positions lol? Women will go for whichever positions hit the best angle for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:39 PM
1

I’m not going to post a bunch of np links just for you to probably not read them. I’ve been here a long time and I’ve seen them when they’re new, and they show up in my search bar. You can die on this dumb hill though if you want to.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:30 PM
2

Ok, not my fault you’re lazy
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:19 PM
1

You can just search “men feminism” in this sub to find them. Lots of men in here hate feminism and love to post about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:10 PM
2

It’s not an uncommon type of post here though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 06:01 PM
2

Whenever there’s been threads like that, people always point out that most men already don’t support feminism. It’s always been that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 05:53 PM
–

Well if you’re unwilling to put forward the value to get better women to reciprocate your interest, then that’s probably a sign that you’re not on the same “level.” That’s just assortative mating. It also explains why uglier men can date hotter women if they go to poorer countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:20 PM
–

Why would you be spending time with women you think are inferior to you if you could get with someone you deem to be on your level?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:09 PM
–

We’ve talked about some experiences we’ve had with dating and how we’ve reflected on past relationships, but never about our past sex lives with previous people. It’s irrelevant because sex with any new person is going to have unique chemistry.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 03:50 PM
3

Right, that’s such an odd thing to write.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 03:40 PM
1

I really don’t see how those things could realistically play out to where you can find out if she fucked Chads that were too hot for her, or if she fucked “a lot” of people.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 01:13 AM
3

I’ve never experienced a “good man” asking me about my n count let alone wanting details on the exact things I did in bed with exes. I seriously doubt it’s a common dating experience for women to be asked questions like that, at least by men they respect. Unless you have an STD to disclose, I think there’s practically no good reason to talk about the sex you used to have with exes. Your exes should be irrelevant to your new relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 04:34 PM
3

Men should value dating women who win a lot of fist fights because it’s harder for women to win them - red pill logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 04:16 PM
–

Most of ppd men’s arguments are just projection. It’s also interesting that they’re usually quick to agree that women are generally more neurotic, but don’t recognize that having a lower self image is a trait that’s linked with said higher neuroticism.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 03:47 PM
1

Not all of them are, but I've yet to see a single positive study about a high n-count. I mean high n count apparently has a very strong correlation with extroversion for either gender, and plenty of people find that desirable. A lot of outgoing extroverts want to date someone similarly outgoing and carefree. I'd be really interested to see a study on this. People have higher n-counts nowadays, but they're having less sex. Do people have higher n counts though? And I’m pretty sure Gen Z is having…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 11:47 PM
5

Cheating can be one unhealthy way of dealing with conflict, but why should we assume that low n relationships are automatically better? Maybe low n people’s personalities are more likely to deadbedroom each other as an unhealthy conflict style instead. There’s certainly a lot of men in here who seem to think a deadbedroom is the worst thing that can ever happen to them. And anecdotally as a low n person, I lose my sex drive when I’m stressed out or unhappy. Sex is not a stress reliever for me li…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:46 PM
4

How do you know with complete accuracy if most people here aren’t posting pics of themselves? Also “attractive women generally have relatively low insecurity” is based on what?? This just sounds like a halo effect bias / “everyone I don’t like must be ugly” post lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:28 PM
4

This is a good description tbh because this is spot on for how I use those words too.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 11:50 PM
1

The pandemic didn’t somehow magically change women’s looks standards, we’re just a lot more asocial now and spend most of our time online consuming gender war content. Any random person with an offensive opinion can have a megaphone now, and can even get monetized for it. That’s how the manosphere got more mainstream too.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:33 PM
1

Facial aesthetics are the same between genders for averageness and symmetry at least, but beauty based on dimorphism is stricter for women. It’s talked about in the article I linked.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 12:31 AM
3

I mean passport bros often say they want to go overseas because the women are thinner and hotter, so in comparison they probably think the poor women in their own country are too ugly. You can say it’s like men’s version of hypergamy lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 12:26 AM
1

Why short? The shortest guy one of my friends is with is like 5’7, and she’s 5’3. I’d say he’s average looking but also cool and charismatic, has passion for his life and isn’t lame or depressing to be around. Those are attractive qualities.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 08:09 PM
3

I don’t think it makes sense to be illegal, it’s not like we don’t have local marriages in wealthy countries based on marrying for money either. We should finding more systemic ways to lift everyone out of poverty so that nobody has to choose to marry for money.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 08:01 PM
1

I have female friends who like to be graphic to me about being horny for their partners lol. For a lot of women that’s like normal girl talk.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:52 PM
1

Sounds like we live in very different worlds then. I see plenty avg people around me in passionate relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:47 PM
1

But you would still have options left even if you aren't getting your 1st choice, and you naturally do with less attractive people. I’m not going to date someone who doesn’t feel like my first choice because I’m not desperate, so that’s irrelevant to me. If you don’t like your choices, then you need to become more competitive for better ones. I don't care about relationship success overall, main problem is professional effects. I’m not here debating about career prospects, this sub is mainly abo…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:45 PM
1

Ok, idk why you’re talking to me then
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:37 PM
2

See this is why looks are subjective because I always thought this haircut was unattractive lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:31 PM
1

You're suggesting that there's strict social stratification based on the trait you're also saying isn't the most impactful trait. I don't know how you don't see the contradiction. I’m explaining how looks are not the main thing keeping men single, so long as they’re not exceptionally below average looking. Everyone at every looks “level” struggles to attract the specific person they want, is my point. It’s a universal dating problem. What's the standard for "unrealistic" here? Because women do f…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:29 PM
1

Um ok, I don’t agree at all. I always loved and was very attracted to the guys I dated even though they’re not conventionally hot chads, and my friends have similar relationships. And since you’re not a woman I don’t think you can speak to what most normal women’s relationships are like with their partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:20 PM
1

Yes being exceptionally hot is good for your career prospects (especially if you’re a man) and more people will want to socialize with you. But in dating if you want to be with someone who’s at least similarly good looking as you (which pretty much everyone does), you still have to stand out against the other men who are just as good looking as you. I don’t think this is hard to understand. were you or are you attractive and are successful and don't like when people point out you had a easier wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:17 PM
1

“Worth something” meaning what exactly? That the woman is hot enough to you? Because that’s exactly what I said: if the only women who return your interest are too ugly to you, then getting hotter is probably the highest ROI for you, since people date assortatively. Not everyone feels like that’s their main dating problem though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 07:00 PM
1

Like I already said in here, looks have way more noticeable impact on your life if you’re either noticeably uglier or noticeably hotter than the other people around you. Most people are average and blend into the crowd though. People also socialize and date within their looks league, so ultimately you still end up having to be competitive beyond your looks, if you want to get noticed by the kind of person you want. Or put another way: Chad still has to compete for Stacy beyond his looks, because…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:35 PM
1

Becoming hotter just means you can date hotter people. You still have to be likeable and impressive to the hotter women you want to date, to stand out to them amongst the men who are similarly as hot as you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:24 PM
1

If your main dating problem is that you think your options are too ugly, then sure improving your looks will be the most impactful in getting a hotter partner. Relationships are usually about much more than just looks though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 08:52 AM
–

Yes they do because people gain their neuroses from how they coped with their early upbringing and family dynamics. Romantic relationships just force you to deal with them more consciously because they require you to be emotionally vulnerable.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 03:18 AM
5

I think I’ve heard about how there’s something about the XY chromosome pair that makes it more unstable, and that’s why male fetuses and babies have lower survival. Adult men also die at younger ages, and more often due to men taking more risks with their health / preventable things that women are less likely to do. But yes it’s a multifaceted issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 02:02 AM
3

Everyone has a looks league, and people tend to already socialize with, work with, and date people within that league. So the way to distinguish yourself there is through non-looks ways. In other words looks are not going to be the main thing limiting your dating success, for most people. Because the usual argument from guys here is that looks are the main thing that keep men single. A lot of ppd men seem incapable of understanding that it’s pretty unrealistic for women to feel attracted to a ma…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:55 AM
–

As if people with little/no relationship experience don’t also have their own neuroses? Nah. Relationships are just a mirror. I think dating mainly gets harder because it becomes harder to socialize and meet as many single people. More people pair off, and most people don’t socialize with new people as much as they get older.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 12:00 AM
0

If you’re an average person dating other average looking people, because that’s most people, then looks will have less sway than your personality, social circles, and social skills will. “Average” is also a very big range btw. Like I said looks alone are not going to heavily change your dating life unless you’re either noticeably uglier or hotter than the other people you mingle with. Because then you’d actually stand out. But most people don’t stand out.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 11:19 PM
3

5’7” is a good height to me tbh. A guy being facially my type has a huge influence though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 10:56 PM
0

I don’t believe that looks are the most impactful thing though, and it doesn’t seem like most people agree on that either. It certainly doesn’t seem to be true for average people (i.e most people), whose looks don’t have huge sway over their lives or who they date. “Looks are the most impactful thing” might be more believable to people who are either abnormally hot or abnormally ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 10:52 PM
1

1 and 4 both have nice bodies to me but 1 is cuter. I’d hypergamously pick him.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 10:48 PM
3

Owning a business is still a job. You still have to be competitive enough to earn customers who want to give you their money. Relationships can’t be hoarded because in a free dating market (i.e where women don’t depend on men for survival), relationships are voluntary. If a woman finds out her bf is cheating, or if he does a bunch of stuff she doesn’t like etc, she has full autonomy to leave him and it won’t threaten her survival needs. Or maybe she stays because she doesn’t think she deserves b…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 10:36 PM
3

HR workers are employees themselves though. They already got a job and are getting a pay check to do those things and appease their boss. Women who are chronically single are in the same spot as men: they both aren’t competitive enough to get the kind of person they want. Also the main reason the job market = dating market analogy is dumb is because you need money to fulfill your basic, urgent survival needs. It’s the bottom rung of Maslow’s hierarchy for a reason. You can take all the time you …
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 09:17 PM
8

Are they actually pursuing them though? Are these single men putting the same effort towards attracting and courting women they find ugly and low value, as they do for the women they think are better? Extremely unlikely. Otherwise they wouldn’t call those women “low value.”
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 08:51 PM
15

I agree that women can still be social safely, but your post is pretty flimsy. Women are a lot more risk averse than men are, something that ppd men criticize women a lot over. A lot of women living longer lives is attributed to us having better survival instincts. And if you’re talking about very young women especially, then it doesn’t make sense to expect them to have the life experience and cognitive skills to understand every possible way they can be in danger. Women mostly learn this by lea…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 08:32 PM
4

Your league is whoever reciprocates interest. There’s so many factors that influence that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:45 PM
0

The thread got deleted so I’m putting my comment here: The only time I’ve ever heard “looks don’t matter” is “when you’re old and in love for a long time” after it. Like to talk about how deep love in a relationship changes how you see the other person. “Looks aren’t everything” is a more common mainstream statement. It’s accurate, and even studies on the halo effect tend to show that the halo effect mainly applies to first impressions biases. It doesn’t mean your personality/content doesn’t pla…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:31 PM
22

Women are sooo paranoid / neurotic / misandrist / fixated on statistical anomalies!! etc etc Like please spare us OP
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:03 PM
3

I already described how height isn’t valued the same for men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:25 PM
1

It’s rare for a man to be very below average height in whatever country he’s natively from, in the same way it’s rare for a woman to be very masculine looking. Both of them are just going to struggle to find many people attracted to them. And I’d say a woman having small boobs is more like a guy being average height / slightly taller than women. They’re both basic dimorphic traits, even though the extreme is more popular. Women with small boobs are still considered attractive when they’re thin/f…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:24 PM
1

People aren’t just judged on one trait like jawline, it’s the total sum of all their features together. Jeremy Allen white for example has a weak jaw/chin, but a lot of women still find him really hot. One feature alone isn’t going to make you ugly. A woman with too many masculine features is going to struggle to get picked though. And I don’t see where we agree on anything. Women’s faces still matter in dating even if they have the option to wear makeup…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 04:06 PM
1

I think men find more women attractive body wise, but not facially. Like seeing women as “butterfaces”is more of a male experience than one women experience towards men. Men are ridiculed for lifts because it’s seen as uncommon and extreme. Makeup used to be treated the same way until women adopted it en masse, and now many women are even seen as “unprofessional” if they don’t wear makeup to work.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:50 PM
1

Yes there’s obviously more that goes into facial beauty than just dimorphism, but dimorphism is the only face trait that’s stricter for women. The overall effect is that women have less leeway to be facially attractive. So men are more similar to each other in their face preferences, like how women are about preferring a taller man. But only one of these gets called “hypergamous” lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:40 PM
2

I mean yes the literature shows that some facial femininity is attractive in men too, but it’s not universal like how it is for women to be considered attractive. The article covers that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:25 PM
8

This is just the most realistic answer. If the dude’s worried so much about the idea of his partner doing paternity fraud, there’s a probably a bunch of other shit going on in that relationship too.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:18 PM
3

Apparently it’s having fuller lips, bigger eyes, prominent cheeks, a smaller/narrow chin, higher and arched brows, narrower and shorter nose, smoother brow ridge, smoother and lighter skin, and less angular contours. This article covers it pretty well: https://www.qoves.com/insights/facial-dimorphism
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 03:09 PM
4

Fine as in I think they’re pretty average, I could see them with similarly average gfs.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 02:58 PM
1

You’re saying you like a woman near your height but too short feels too feminine?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:34 PM
3

I think all of them look fine, but the first one could probably use dental work.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:31 PM
2

Idk what you mean by “biologically” but I’m pretty sure being tall is considered a wealth signal. I think wealthier men are more likely to prefer taller women? Then other men prefer shorter women because they see it as more feminine / it makes them feel bigger by comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:24 PM
-2

“Women are so hypergamous because most of them prefer taller men, but men like both tall and short women!” But men and women don’t prioritize the same features in each other, so making everything about height is just male solipsism. For example the preference for women to have very feminine faces is pretty monolithic across all cultures, while women’s preference for facial masculinity is more varied and culture dependent. Or another example is how men across all cultures have very strong prefere…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:12 PM
3

Wait so is “hiplet” the newest ragebait going around now? Why did they have to make the name sound cute though, you can hardly call that a slur. Modern men are losing their culture.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 07:04 PM
2

Expecting men to court women is not a bad thing or a harmful thing it’s a good thing that protects women from dealing with piss poor dudes who are not truly interested in them. I understand and agree, but courting doesn’t have to involve paying money, especially for a first date which for a lot of people there’s a high chance of there not even being a second date. So for plenty of people, it can make more sense for the first date to not be more of a financial hit for either person. Courting can …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 05:15 PM
4

In other words you just made that shit up lol
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 05:06 PM
1

When a woman is agreeing to split bills AFTER the man offered it’s usually because she ain’t that into the dude. Sure I’ve done this to a man before because I didn’t want him to get the wrong idea and feel indebted to him. But I’ve also offered to split with men I do like, because I want to let them know I think their time is just as valuable as mine. I generally don’t agree to a first date if I don’t already feel some interest and respect for him. There is a difference between a man offering an…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 05:04 PM
5

But women also get with men outside of their preferences, and men here call that settling. So you can’t have it both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:53 PM
4

I feel like the men who pick women based on looks alone do so out of a scarcity mindset. Like they feel they can’t afford to have other qualities in a partner, so they may as well only care about what gets their dick hard?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 04:32 PM
1

Well you said that it’s combative to go against a dating norm. I live with a man that does more of the chores to make up for the fact that I work more hours outside the home, and our plan to (probably) have kids is that he will pick up the slack for me being pregnant, needing post partum recovery, taking less pay from my job, etc. Agreeing on this wasn’t an issue in our relationship because we both have pretty progressive attitudes all around anyway, and I screened for that in dating men. I don’…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:18 PM
0

"If you as a man intend to not pay and go 50:50 on a date you should tell the woman before the date" which to me indicates they want to keep this dating rule so universal that a deviation from it is so significant that you have to inform your date in advance of your planned offense lol. That’s a fair point, and yeah that doesn’t make sense to me personally because you can’t force someone to pay for you. So it’s not an injustice to not have your meal paid for after you assumed it would be imo, ev…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:28 AM
1

It’s also a dating convention for women to do most/all the chores, do you think a woman’s being combative if she wants to split chores instead of do it all by herself?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:35 PM
1

If you read other women’s opinions on this there are clearly a lot of reasons why a woman may prefer to split on the first date, and some of those reasons are out of wanting to be agreeable, like wanting to make the first date with a stranger as low stakes for both people as possible. Plenty of people just want the first date to be a casual vibe check, and to me this really just seems to come down to cultural differences; there are of course other ways for a woman to try to impress and be agreea…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:31 PM
11

💀 please take this to r/sex, not PPD lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:52 PM
9

OP, couldn’t you just argue that a woman offering to split/pay is also signaling she’s agreeable? I just don’t think this argument is really strong, and I say that as someone who thinks there’s nothing inherently better about a man either paying or not paying.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:50 PM
3

I’m not personally in favor of any kind of dating rule needing to be universal, because dating should be about free association and compatibility. But I feel like I can answer on this anyway. For one, I don’t see women saying that men paying for first dates should be a universal dating rule, in the same way that pilled men say that higher n count women are universally “low value, ran through whores”and undeserving of relationships with any man: Women seem to either see paying for dates as a requ…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 03:22 PM
3

I do think it’s up to everyone to decide what kind of dynamic and labor division they’re looking for in their relationship, and date accordingly. So I really don’t see a point in trying to mandate a universal rule for everyone to go 50/50 on dates because there are clearly people who keep some amount of old school dynamics…There’s no right or wrong way to date, all that matters is if you can find the person you’re compatible with. It really shouldn’t be such a dramatic topic as it currently is i…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 02:41 PM
3

I’d think those women do, because personally I neither expected to have a first date paid for and I also refuse to do the bulk of the chores. But most women statistically do end up doing most of the domestic work though, so it makes sense if those women want a man who holds up to a mirrored role. No?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:25 PM
4

I don’t agree that either gender is more self aware of whether or not their personality lives up to what they want from their dream partner. I do think men are more confident about it though because they don’t think about compatibility as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:17 AM
3

So you have no point then
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:07 AM
1

Not when there’s many such cases of guys complaining that women break up over “stupid trivial things” like politics.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:52 AM
3

🙄 where are men throwing themselves at women if not primarily on dating apps…most relationships in 2026 start from online now.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:48 AM
3

Certain men spamming likes on every woman on a dating app doesn’t mean that any of those men are going to be compatible enough to “choose better” from though. And for every relationship that does actually form, both people have arguably “chosen better” than their previous experiences, and are now both off the market.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:39 AM
4

Okay, the guy who will take you as you are isn’t exactly who you want, but plenty of women compromise that for a litany of reasons. It’s not the guy she wants the most ultimately, it’s the guy who stays around, is consistent, and tolerable to be around most of the time. Pretty much everyone will make compromises when the other person checks enough of their boxes. That’s why the issue isn’t gendered. They’re on the dating app casino that’s been the defacto default for almost a decade now. Women a…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:31 AM
5

No I just think your answer was obtuse. Especially when men say here that “it’s different actually” when the topic is about telling women to choose better, on the basis that women have men throwing themselves at them. Like women are supposed to be self accountable for their standards but men aren’t?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 07:09 AM
4

Ok
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:58 AM
8

You don’t need people throwing themselves at you to choose better. Hardly any woman’s gonna respect you anyway if you don’t have any dignity. Even red pillers get this.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:51 AM
7

The person who will just “take you as you are” is practically never the person you actually want though. That’s the point. Even red pillers understand that if they want to date from the so-called “high quality women” pool, they need to actually compete for them. They have a list of complaints of what they think is undatable about the “modern woman”, which is fine. I don’t fault anyone for being picky. Women can more easily decenter men because we have lower sex drives that are more responsive an…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:47 AM
4

You think men’s standards are more reasonable because you’re a man, lol. Everything you said is extremely debatable.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:33 AM
7

Many men can and do choose better in dating though. Just because someone’s currently frustrated doesn’t mean they can’t ever find new women. And if they truly gave up with dating, then they wouldn’t be asking us.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:29 AM
6

But they’re making posts about it asking us to answer? This sub is for debate, not a men’s diary.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 06:20 AM
5

I don’t agree with logos, but can’t a bi person also choose to settle down with one person…? You can be attracted to many people over your life yet still want monogamy. Straight people do this too.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:42 AM
28

Then what’s the correct response to someone saying they struggle to find someone they’re compatible with? You want us to tell men to change their standards…? Pursue relationships that they’ll be miserable in? None of yall are giving any alternatives.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:56 PM
6

I mean even healthy relationships require work, because you are two individuals with different enough personalities that you have to effectively communicate and work on growing together as a team. Relationships are not just about compatibility, but developing healthy enough communication skills to work around both of your neuroses…Which is objectively pretty hard. There’s a middle ground between a relationship feeling like a drain on your life, and expecting there to be no hard times or emotiona…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:49 PM
2

“Desirable women” is pretty vague. If other women don’t respect those women, then the “desirability” is pretty meaningless. I understand that the guys on here think any attention from women is enviable though.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:32 PM
1

The same type of character as the man with multiple baby mamas who sleeps with pathetic women? Yeah no, one of these men is clearly more conventionally desirable.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:25 PM
12

Seriously. They’re being forced for once to experience / think about something that women have been saying about dating for ages, and are actually noticing it’s a serious struggle? Crazy /s
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:22 PM
2

Sure but her point was that pilled men venerate a man who plays the field / has high n count more than they do a man that settled down with someone he loves. Almost anyone can have optionality if they’re depraved enough, but what’s hard is having options you actually respect and admire.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 11:12 PM
1

Well whatever it is they’re calling misogynistic, do you think they have a point or not? And then do you think a woman preferring a man who pays is always being misandrist?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 01:22 AM
1

since women actually get pregnant they’ll only take flings with men who have the best genetics possible the vast majority of the time. That’s not how women pick who they casually sleep with at all, in my experience. women then become significantly more willing when said hot guy appears, and then try to leverage sex with him to hopefully get a relationship which also usually doesn’t work. I don’t think most women are being strategic or dumb enough to think sleeping with a guy will help secure a g…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 12:01 AM
-1

Well then why arent they paying for their own on dates to get the message across as clear as possible? And if women are doing so good today, why hasnt it been a big shift in paying for first dates or dates in general? I think because for a lot of women, a man offering to pay is symbolic of him being willing to financially provide in the (future) established relationship, if need be, from generosity. Part of the early courting phase is that you’re auditioning your best behavior. If you ask why wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 11:37 PM
3

Really not sure here what you mean specifically by “power”, because it seems pretty contextually flexible in the same way that perceived competence (and morality) are. Someone can be perceived as powerful/competent in one setting or in one way that a woman may or may not care about or admire, but not be perceived like that in another. Ex: I’m not attracted to any random man just because he’s powerful in his job position, especially if I think he has to be immoral to keep that power. Also I perso…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 11:06 PM
1

Nobody “lied” by giving their opinion, and you clearly deserved that ban.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:49 PM
1

So you don’t know what time and place means. Makes sense I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:44 PM
1

Not being overweight is not going to magically get any man dates (and it’s not like overweight men don’t get into relationships either), overweight people are more than aware of how their weight is generally viewed, and he didn’t ask for constructive criticism on his body. This shouldn’t be hard to understand. Idk why you are going on about “people are lying to him!” when nobody specifically said to him that being overweight is conventionally attractive? Like this is just really dramatic. It’s a…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:41 PM
1

It sounds like you just can’t accept that not everybody wants to be criticized on their body…? Maybe wait for someone to explicitly ask instead of giving them unsolicited advice on their body. You just might be the miserable one in this case.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:47 PM
-1

If he wanted beauty advice he could go to another sub for that, or specify he was open to critiques on his appearance. Clearly he was interested in profile advice specifically. You also don’t know if he’s already trying to lose weight, what his current body image is like if he’s open to comments on his body, etc. It’s notoriously hard to lose weight / get in shape, which is why people congratulate it when you do it. So imo it really just comes off as you wanting to be mean to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 08:42 PM
2

Taurus moon is basically like being emotionally a Taurus, they’re famous for their very chill demeanor but also being pretty stubborn and set in their ways. That probably helps balance out the impulsive Aries sun tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 08:15 PM
1

Do you know your moon sign? Or even your mars sign
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 08:02 PM
1

Yay!! 😁🎉
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:58 PM
1

Do people consider you a hothead?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:55 PM
1

It’s not my birthday, I’m a Taurus just trying to be nice to the Geminis lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:53 PM
1

What sign are you? And do you have a favorite sign?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:48 PM
1

😔
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:44 PM
0

Maybe because he’s asking for more immediate advice with his profile? Not what you think is ugly about him. I’m pretty sure overweight people are aware that their weight makes them less conventionally attractive, and don’t enjoy being overweight.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:43 PM
1

You shouldn’t be talking like this while it’s still Gemini season, what if today’s someone’s birthday and they read this?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:33 PM
7

I’ve generally found it to be true on here that “high value” means something very different when a pilled man is saying it vs when any woman is saying it. “High value” should always be followed with “to who?”
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:25 PM
1

Obviously I’m referring to a pic from the past, of course you wouldn’t post something like that if you’re currently in a monogamous relationship with someone new. But the pic on its own isn’t scandalous or offensive.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:14 PM
1

How does that comparison mean anything. Why not compare posting a pic of yourself sloppy drunk / vomiting in a toilet vs posting a tame pic of you kissing someone you once hooked up with?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 06:58 PM
3

I refuse to believe that video was real because it was so cringe.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 06:50 PM
1

We have an N count thread because men couldn’t stop clogging the main sub up with posts about it. I’m asking these guys why they only treat n count like that but not getting drunk…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 06:48 PM
6

Exactly. Hook up culture is mostly so hard for men because they’re mainly competing over a small minority of women that are open to casual sex at that given time. There’s sooo many men who want exactly those women.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 06:19 PM
1

That has nothing to do with what I said at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 06:07 PM
1

Why do you guys have to bring up such extremes? 300 is a mythically high number, sex work is uniquely stigmatized apart from casual sex, and most people don’t want their partner continuing to do sex work while in a committed relationship because most people want monogamy. What I was getting at in my post is that pilled guys spend so much time imagining in depraved detail all the non-casual sex women might’ve had in their youth (“because women always lie”) and how that sex “ruined” them as bad pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:54 PM
3

To him and men like him, probably lol. He’s not a woman though so it’s always just a funny conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:38 PM
3

So all the non-conservative men who disagree with you are just lying? Are they in non-conservative relationships just out of politeness too? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:35 PM
3

If by most men you mean conservative men, then sure, because most men are conservative. But that’s not a naturally male issue, it’s just an ideological one.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:24 PM
3

Red pillers usually argue that “men are logical, not emotional” to defend why they think something is true. And something being a personal problem instead of an objective one means that it’s not generally a problem at all in the rest of the free dating market.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:17 PM
0

Care to explain how and why that means anything?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:09 PM
3

I mean I’m not addressing you in particular because you’ve already said in here that you don’t moralize n count against women, and that you’re openly insecure about not having casual sex. I’m really addressing the guys who moralize hard on n count (for women especially) and claim “it’s not about insecurity actually”
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 04:51 PM
1

This is just admitting there’s no logical argument for it.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 04:45 PM
2

Like I said I think people generally want someone to have similar habits around vices, because it shows how conscientious you are, but why would you fixate so hard on n count specifically as opposed to any other vice?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 04:43 PM
5

I see casual sex as like any other “vice”, like drinking: Everyone has their own idea of how much is “too much” to where they think you’re too irresponsible to be compatible. I think it’s normal to want someone who generally has the same attitude and habits around vices as you do. But nobody is going around on dates like “so how often did you use to drink in college? How often did you have too much? Or had to throw up?” Like that’s a strange thing to fixate on. If someone’s an “irresponsible” pe…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 04:32 PM
–

The government forcibly harvesting my embryo doesn’t sound like it respects my body autonomy let alone my privacy. The procedure is also probably way more medically invasive and traumatizing than just taking an abortion pill… Aside from those issues, this raises a lot of other ethical issues like wtf is going to happen to those embryos once they’re artificially birthed. If they’re not profitable, are the children going to be sold into labor? Trafficked? Like you have to consider the humanity and…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:21 PM
–

Yes it wouldn’t shock me that people are more likely to get divorced if the relationship is very unfair and unequal to one party…Nobody wants to work all day and then come home to also do all the chores.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 02:29 PM
2

The main problem with choice feminism is that it lacks any critical analysis of why women may make the choices that they do, like with issues pertaining to class struggle. It’s a shallow view of feminism, but that doesn’t mean exercising choice is bad in its own right.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 01:37 AM
2

To me being confident is really about taking initiative in life and being brave. Confidence is basically the result of being brave and doing hard things, so it’s something adults have to cultivate, you’re not born with it. You can have insecurities or be unsure of yourself, but if you don’t let those things hold you back from taking initiative anyway, then that shows confidence. That’s what’s attractive imo.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:27 PM
0

Female breadwinner relationships are the most unequal in terms of domestic labor, where the woman ends up doing even more of it. So it’s kind of rich to say that “no amount of doing more dishes” will fix anything, or blame it on women’s DNA lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 09:30 PM
2

Having conservative opinions on gender correlates more so with growing up lower class, or growing up in an area where those ideas were already common. Not whether or not you’re wealthy as an adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 08:57 PM
14

It is cultural homophobia/biphobia, but there’s definitely differences in how homophobia is wielded against men vs how it is against women. And the difference seems to be rooted in gender expectations, like what OP explains. The type of homo/bi phobia that women face also can reveal a lot about expectations placed on women too. Also I don’t understand how mixed orientation relationships have their own unique challenges that fully straight or fully gay couples don’t have…?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:41 PM
–

This is good advice too tbh. If social exposure therapy is too scary, this is a good way to start small and build confidence.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 01:53 AM
–

When I think of “good personality”, I think of it as anything that makes you more likeable, interesting, respectable, enjoyable to be around, etc. basically. All kinds of people can develop themselves in a way to cultivate more of those qualities to have a “good personality” imo independently of their more inherent personality traits. It’s more about striving to sustainably be the best version of yourself rather than trying to change who you are. Look to people who are relatable role models to y…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 01:42 AM
3

I think I feel the same way about men, but I’d add that the guy’s face usually needs to be my “type” first too. At least average looking, but a specific look.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:27 PM
1

I wouldn’t consider speed dating and dating mixer events to be very natural at all. It puts too much pressure.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:22 PM
3

The same is true for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:53 PM
1

I’ve been saying this too. The lack of natural irl social engagement that’s part of attraction + the poor supply and demand are the main reasons why men can hardly get matches online, and on top of that add the shitty app algorithms too.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:52 PM
5

If a man dates a woman that he thinks is uglier than himself, isn’t that just called settling? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:39 PM
6

I really don’t think those feelings have to be mutually exclusive. If dating gives you enough anxiety that you avoid it, I think it could also be easier to end up believing that it’s just not for you, and turn your attention to other things. Maybe it depends on your personality? At least that’s how I felt when I went a few years staying single after a bad relationship. I had so much anxiety around love and intimacy, but I was able to be content enough with other things in my life that didn’t inv…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 11:30 AM
7

That essentially is red pill negging though. Trying to bring women down a peg so that men can hopefully gain easier access.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 12:35 AM
1

I’ve just noticed in my own life that the women I’ve seen who have that preference either come from a lower class background, and/or they have more conservative opinions. There’s also certainly more than 1 way to be “masculine”, just like how guys feel about femininity.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 11:08 PM
1

I think it’s more of a class divide and political divide thing tbh. Tall women may want a man taller than themselves, but not necessarily want the hypermasculine archetype you described.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:52 PM
2

I guess it could be any of those things, I really don’t know much about his beliefs and goals with his looks. He could even be changing his goals now that he’s so famous? Like my first instinct was just that maybe he wanted a stronger nose because a lot of people associate it with masculinity, and maybe he wanted that aesthetic more? Since a lot of normal people make fun of him for looking too twinkish.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:40 PM
2

You might need to define what you mean. I like mostly masculine but not hypermasculine.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:31 PM
2

Omg I’m just finding out about his nose job. His face was never my type either, but I think his old nose seemed to suit his face better. Like his new nose looks too long for him or something. I like strong noses on men like a lot of women do, and I feel like he was trying to create that more distinct look, but the new nose just looks less harmonious on him imo.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:10 PM
2

I think as long as he has interests he’s more passionate about than looksmaxxing, and isn’t overall more neurotic than I am, then I don’t necessarily see it as a turn off.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 09:44 PM
3

I’ve never thought about that, ever. I usually notice though if guys have nice shoulders, arms, hands, neck, legs, and ass lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 07:28 PM
4

they lie and go in the opposite direction is that thing that’s why they claim that all struggling men are misogynist who’ve never showered which is basically blue pill 101 They’re commenting on how these guys write and how they’re presenting their personalities online, not on their looks, because most incels aren’t posting pictures/videos of themselves anyway. Whether or not it’s accurate or helpful, that’s just how it goes with anonymous interaction online. red pill never claims beauty and char…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:03 PM
35

I have straight up never seen a woman on here claim that the opposite sex should date someone less attractive. I actually only ever see men here telling that to women. To “give guys a chance” and “stop being hypergamous” lol. It’s also typically the women here (and blue flaired men) saying that beauty doesn’t correlate to good or bad character, that plenty of average looking men are great, etc. I do see a lot of red pill men on here though who claim that hot women are nicer and have better chara…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:49 PM
3

There are aspects of female nature that are in-line with redistributionist and equality-of-outcome values, yes. As if many men aren’t pushing for equality-of-outcome in insisting that every man should have guaranteed access to a wife and kids (“”my genetic legacy””), just for him existing, and are willing to support fascist policies to make it happen? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:58 PM
0

Truly spoken like someone who’s literally not affected by any of those things.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:27 PM
2

I think it is true that women do not naturally think systemically. Nor do they tend to put the needs of abstract things like society over their personal feelings. That’s not what she said though? She just said women are less interested in violence. Women tend to have our own ways of thinking “systematically” and putting abstract values above themselves. Like for example women are more likely to do volunteer work, are more likely to attend communal activities for shared religious/spiritual belief…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:16 PM
2

Of course it’s all personal preference. If you say you think 20 y/o women are hottest but another man says they remind him too much of children, isn’t that his opinion? Just like if a man says women near his own age are better partners because they’re wiser or better communicators or more sexually confident, you could also disagree with him. Or even just say that you don’t value those things as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 02:10 AM
1

Didn’t you already ask a guy here and he answered you?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 01:25 AM
29

Men just generally seem to have a lot more unpredictable behavior, and are more likely to escalate in ways that are actually dangerous (like stalking). Like one time I had an older man following me around in a grocery store at night, struck up a conversation with me and asked for my number, and then continued to still follow me around the store up until I had to leave even after I turned him down (I asked to be escorted to my car). I’ve had other times where guys I’ve known are persistent and pu…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 01:24 AM
2

If you prioritize your partner looking really young, at the cost of other things that come with dating that age range, then sure it sounds like the best deal for you. But clearly not every man is going to value the same things. Especially for LTRs.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 12:46 AM
1

…Do they have to be “lying” to anyone? Maybe she’s trying to impress him by acting more serious and stable. It makes sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 12:25 AM
3

Ok, good luck with that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 03:36 PM
3

Because it seems like an unhealthy obsession. Nothing external will fix that for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 03:23 PM
3

Probably not tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:55 PM
3

If you obsess over getting casual relationships so badly, what makes you think you’ll be happy with a monogamous LTR where you have to give all that up? You might have bigger problems.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:51 PM
2

Uh huh.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:48 PM
3

You’ve never heard of the manosphere?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:25 PM
2

Sure, I think anyone can find their person at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:12 PM
2

It certainly seems to go both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:43 PM
1

Not necessarily with the women they actually want. A lot of guys stay in the bachelor phase specifically because they’re looking for their dream woman and can’t find her, but will still fuck other random women along the way.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:42 PM
1

For real
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:14 PM
2

When ugly women aren’t alone, you think they’re with hot guys or something? People already mate assortatively; for practically every paired up below avg woman, that’s another below avg man that’s also paired up and not online complaining about being single. Also pretty women face more negativity bias than handsome men do, and there’s plenty of research on this. There’s no social or workplace punishments for being attractive if you’re a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 10:55 PM
5

How is that relevant?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 09:23 PM
1

That’s fair, I’m also afraid of frying my hair, it’s already high maintenance enough because it’s long and wavy i.e prone to frizz and drying out. I have enough shit to worry about 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 09:04 PM
3

I’d love to dye my hair fun colors if I didn’t have to worry about the time and money spent on maintenance tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 08:58 PM
4

Oh for sure, there’s already been light shed on how much negativity online is generated by bot farms. It just doesn’t stop the real life people from seeing all that rage bait online though and turning more negative and suspicious themselves as a result, the more time they spend online. Like a lot of guys in this sub.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 08:44 PM
15

Why is dating suddenly harder? Well for one people are less social now and more suspicious towards each other than ever, so it’s harder to socialize and mingle with new people. It’s less convenient and affordable to do so, and it’s so easy now to get sucked into online algorithms that keep you isolated and emotionally addicted. Introverts and neurotic people are obviously going to struggle the most, and they’re also overly represented in online forums like reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 07:23 PM
1

Yup, good talk.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 06:54 PM
1

And higher body count correlates to less neuroticism? Do you/have you dated a lot of women? I’m not sure why I’m supposed to care about anecdotes. Are you trying to say you date a lot of neurotic women who are high n? That’s a pattern in your life? So to have a high n count is to say that a woman doesn’t care much about what man gets access to her body and also there’s no experience in cultivating actual relationship skills. Sure, because I’m saying that n count whether it’s high or low doesn’t …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 06:34 PM
1

Show me where I used the words “shit” or that I think abuse victims are “shit”. I even gave that person my own experience as someone who was previously is an abusive relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 05:58 PM
1

Where tf did I call victims of abuse “shit”
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 05:42 PM
1

Yes I was responding to the OP, which was specifically about many red pilled men’s role in their bad relationships. But it should be obvious that the topic of like attracts like goes beyond just red pill men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 12:15 PM
2

Why are you accusing me of saying something I never said? Everyone is responsible for their own healing, even if the abuser has done more of the moral wrongdoing. And it’s not a gendered issue.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 02:34 AM
2

I don’t think n count indicates that; higher n count correlates with lower neuroticism, for example. If anything I’d think n count could point to something about your conflict style and extroversion, but not whether or not you have good relationship skills. And relationships working out partly depends on having compatible personalities and conflict styles anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 02:31 AM
2

Huh? I literally said that I had to learn how to not attract abusers lol. Abusers themselves are also responsible for their own behavior too. Where am I specifically “blaming men”?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 01:13 AM
2

At my lowest n counts, I was way easier to take advantage of and had worse communication skills. Having very little experience doesn’t mean you’re going to have good relationship skills…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 01:02 AM
2

Yes? Having weak boundaries for example can attract people who’ll take advantage of that. I definitely lived that life and had to learn how to not repeat patterns of accepting abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 01:00 AM
2

That doesn’t make any sense, and I don’t see how that’s related to my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 11:39 PM
1

Saying that you play a role in the patterns of your relationships is not a JWF lol. Relationships take two to tango.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 11:32 PM
1

Do you think a pattern of shitty relationships just happens to you at random? You don’t think you play a large role in the kind of people who want your company, vs. which ones don’t? A lot of people find out that what you said just isn’t true after they work on their own problems so that they stop repeating the same exact relationship issues they used to have. Only problem is it takes self awareness.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 11:26 PM
7

I’ve been saying this. All these guys who see women as just interchangeable, as holes, or as only good for how they look, seem to always have shitty relationships. It’s almost as if like attracts like or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 11:01 PM
7

Sometimes they just need to broadcast their midlife crisis like this. It even made him forget what thread he’s posting in too.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 09:56 PM
2

It’s not weird for people in their late 20s+ to have LTRs fall apart and then re enter dating. Why do you assume they’ve been chronically single and waiting lol?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:31 PM
3

There’s definitely a difference between being able to tell that someone is very conventionally attractive, vs actually finding them attractive yourself. Very normal since people have types.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 01:26 PM
1

Huh?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:41 PM
1

No but he could probably find those women.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:39 PM
–

Laziness, need for approval, and apparently the need to blame women on top of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:36 PM
1

You’ll hardly find women who prefer men without any conventionally attractive or dimorphic traits, just like there’s hardly any men who’d prefer a woman with big shoulders, no discernible curves, narrow hips, high body fat, and a masculine face.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:31 PM
1

A skinny/lean chiseled guy is like the opposite of a big burly hairy guy…so yes women (and gay men) can like “opposites” too? We can both pick and choose here, lol. But let’s not act like it’s impossible for a woman to have mostly all conventionally attractive traits, and be super popular with most men. It’d look like a woman with proportionally big T&A despite having a skinny body, petite frame, small waist, wide hips, and a very feminine face.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:44 PM
-1

That’s literally the same thing with women. Women often have types and tend to not stray away from their preferred type/niche, and as a result don’t really notice most other men who don’t fit that. Idk why this is hard for you to understand.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:23 PM
2

The all-over petite woman being petite is what’s conventionally feminine/attractive about her. Chubby women tend to be preferred only when they have bigger T&A (especially if they maintain a small WHR). It’s literally the same thing as I described for how women have preferences in men, lol. People can often prefer unpopular traits when they’re paired with other popular traits. It’s not gendered.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:16 PM
0

You notice how you paired small tits (an unpopular trait) with being slim (a popular trait)? The same tends to work for men too: Men can often still be considered attractive and a niche preference when their less popular traits are paired with more conventionally attractive traits…Because people are a sum of their parts. For example I prefer average height men, but I also prefer them paired with broad shoulders and/or muscles. That combo is ideal to me. I know women who like scrawny men, but pai…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 05:02 PM
–

Yeah personally the guys I’ve known who tend to enjoy/want casual sex just don’t have attractive personalities, to me. I can understand why women who mirror them more would like them, though.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 03:51 PM
–

Why do guys on here keep acting like men can only rack up a high n count if they’re conventionally hot? It’s like they don’t actually know many women who hook up, and so they don’t know what those men are often like. It’s almost like they only pay attention to the hottest men out there who have casual sex, because those are the men they actually idolize. Hot people technically can have the most options, so maybe that’s why they think it makes sense? But the common denominator I’ve seen is that h…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:56 PM
1

That’s fine if you want to play dumb, but I don’t think you’d like it if I did the same thing but gender swapped lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 12:05 PM
5

Brother what do those words that I said mean to you, if not that those men think they deserve to be paired off with their looksmatch. Don’t be obtuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 02:08 AM
3

The way they explain it is that the reason these guys struggle is because their looksmatches are too busy chasing men above their own level, i.e those women are delusional/hypergamous and should come back down to earth to date guys like them. And that if women don’t fix this for ~society~ then there will be bad consequences that women will deserve. Hope that helps.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 01:56 AM
-1

I have heard rumor from the Council that any sexual contact counts as long as she’s hot. If she’s not hot then it sadly doesn’t increase your n count. I have yet to find out if this applies gender reversed.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 06:11 PM
3

So the tldr is that she’s saying being born male means you’re guilty of oppressing women, so the fair solution is to sterilize male babies…And you’re saying this is a mainstream feminist belief??
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:57 PM
2

Oh oops. Fixed my comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:47 PM
3

I sure did respond to his comment. The burden of explanation for that video is on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:33 PM
7

Again you are being lazy as the OP to tell everyone to watch a 20 minute video when clearly you can’t even explain her argument coherently, if there even is a coherent argument to follow at all. Patriarchy also doesn’t mean that men are “collectively” guilty lmao so I can’t even argue with your straw feminism here. It just makes you look even more bad faith.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:31 PM
5

How are we supposed to know that she builds a case on points that all feminists supposedly agree on…? Infringements on bodily autonomy are something that so many feminists are against, which is pretty mainstream. Feminists definitely aren’t homogeneous enough to make that kind of assumption because we disagree all the time, anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:24 PM
19

There’s a lot of guys on here who claim they deserve their “looksmatch” and see the women who don’t like them back as being wrong/delusional. As if these guys get to determine everyone’s “objective value” and we’re all just supposed to agree with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:17 PM
6

OP’s the one who even posted it to support his argument, he as the OP should be able to explain it instead of expecting everyone here to individually invest in sitting to watch a 20 minute video on their own time. Edit because I mistook you to be OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:11 PM
1

High n men are a small minority of men, so the vast majority of low n women won’t be pairing with them anyway. And no I don’t agree that being hot and charming is necessary to be a high n count man, and similarly plenty of hot and charming men have average or low n counts. Any man can be high n count if he’s low inhibition and extroverted enough, honestly. But to your point, yes generally if you have a lot of other positive qualities that the other party wants, then there are lot of people that …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:00 PM
1

Ok but that’s more common knowledge. Red pillers tend to believe that only women get jealous in casual situations, but not men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 10:11 PM
1

That’s a personal choice lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 09:23 PM
1

Finally we get to have a tier list for the Council to commiserate on.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 09:14 PM
2

Well that’s not what the OP is about. If your goal is just to sleep with as many emotionally unstable women as possible then sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 09:06 PM
2

Having casual sex doesn’t mean that women are pleased with you, hell most of them aren’t even getting to orgasm lol. Men have casual sex primarily for themselves, not in any service to please women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 09:00 PM
2

I don’t think it’s inaccurate to say that low n people generally see having a high n in a negative light. Which is judging.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:51 PM
1

We don’t agree. Having a bunch of casual sex partners =/= you’re doing it because you want to please women.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:50 PM
1

That flair actually made me laugh lol
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:42 PM
2

It was never about sexual validation from women when most guys don’t even give af if the woman has an orgasm lol. They see women as a tally on their notch count for the most part, and the number mostly matters so they can compare it to other men’s.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:35 PM
0

Do you think women generally approve of Andrew Tate? Serious question
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:14 PM
5

I find that very hard to believe when red pill is just an edgy rehash of old school / religious beliefs about gender essentialism…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:13 PM
7

I think men are just divided on that tbh. A lot of men believe that the man should be the leader and ultimate decision maker, and the woman should just follow his lead.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 06:05 PM
0

Well you got me there tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 05:25 PM
2

Both genders get jealous.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 05:17 PM
4

I’d imagine being an asshole also means having a more risk taking personality that pushes other people’s boundaries, so the asshole will approach way more women and rack up more casual partners, while being less likely to have happy LTRs.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 05:16 PM
3

I’m mostly talking about the conservative / red pill’s notion of masculinity, i.e men are supposed to dominate others and women are like pawns in men’s lives that are supposed to submit and be agreeable.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 05:13 PM
-4

Some women care about being treated well while others will take disrespect. The guy is still primarily focused on sex for his own ego’s sake.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 04:18 PM
0

If they cared more about female validation then they’d actually care about treating women well and making them happy. It’s more like they want to dominate women so other men find them impressive.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 04:02 PM
2

? I don’t think that actually addresses my comment. I said MRAs are more different from the other manosphere groups.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:21 PM
3

Not really unless you also use conditioner.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:12 PM
3

I’m not sure how homogenous the MRAs are to say if I fully agree, but I do think the common culture warrior MRA types definitely seem to have similar beliefs as the other manosphere guys; incels/mgtow/RP/BP etc. guys do tend to believe that we live in a matriarchy / “gynarchy”.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:05 PM
3

All of those except MRA tend to focus on reductive theories of “female nature” so yes they do actually share some beliefs in common.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 01:23 PM
12

I always saw “manosphere” as an umbrella referring to all the different men’s communities that have a central focus on gendered dating issues, theories on “female nature”, and promoting the performance of patriarchal masculinity. I don’t see MRAs as inherently being part of the manosphere, but plenty of MRAs do obviously blend into those communities too. Just like how there are feminists that mingle within the FDS/pink pill communities.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 12:55 PM
2

Is that one you’re into too? And I’d say I’m mostly a sub with some switchy tendencies, but I think part of that is because I’m just shy about being dominant. Something inhibits me there for some reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 04:13 AM
5

A reverse harem of submissive/switchy men…😮‍💨 I’d never do it irl but the idea is hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:32 AM
4

The words “generally” and “overall” mean that it applies to most young women. I’m not talking about the minority of women that are into older men.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:26 AM
4

The majority of relationships are women with their age peers, so clearly women don’t prefer older men overall…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:17 AM
2

Not exactly but ok
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:15 AM
2

I’d say her face is average tbh. But even still, what I’m saying is that people still overall consider her hot as a full package, because people are seen as a sum of all their traits. Not just their face.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 03:08 AM
3

I pretty much agree with OP. His observations can just also coexist with the men noticing that dating has gotten easier for them personally as they’ve gotten older.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:55 AM
1

just being agreeable isn't good enough for a guy you actually want to date. Couldn’t agree more with that!
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:38 AM
2

I mean this is the same way a lot of women view tall men imo. Tall guys seem to get away with having less attractive faces but they’re still considered hot, overall. I think most men feel that way about Sydney.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:35 AM
1

That’s why you shouldn’t put too much stock in either one tbh. Like the guys here who say “women just need to be hot and agreeable” are unironically the worst guys to have a LTR with for example.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:30 AM
0

Wrong but you’re entitled to that opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:23 AM
2

I’ll assume that means the answer is no
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:13 AM
1

I can’t tell if you’re disagreeing with me or not tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:12 AM
3

Success and provider qualities are a double edged sword for men in the same way that beauty is a double edged sword for women. Provider qualities can definitely make guys more attractive to women, but they’ll also attract women who only see him as a retirement plan. Being prettier can give women a larger dating pool with hotter guys to pick from, but it also attracts more men who won’t respect you because they only value you for your beauty.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 02:11 AM
7

Women would overwhelmingly choose to date much older men if they thought they were universally the most appealing option. Age does matter to most women. I think men can becoming more appealing relative to their own past dating lives and have a better time, but they won’t somehow become the popular choice among young women just because they have their lives together.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 01:15 AM
2

So you’re saying you don’t find Sydney Sweeney hot
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 01:03 AM
8

Most couples have only a small age gap between them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 01:00 AM
8

Yes they exist they’re just clearly in the minority though.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 12:53 AM
5

If I’m picturing the same kind of couple as you are, I think those women tend to latch onto those guys as a stand in father figure. The type with more daddy issues basically. The relationship is usually more chaotic too.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 12:46 AM
11

I think this depends on the woman. Some will be easier because they’ll be attracted to the guy as a provider or a pseudo father figure, while others will turn him down because they find him too old / creepy.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 12:28 AM
2

I’m talking about “high value men” however you want to determine that. Hot rich alpha chad is just the epitome of that in rp. But the main point is that an “average” woman can only ever lock down an “average” man, no matter her age. And since every red piller ever here seems to always give me a different definition of what the wall is, then you may as well state what you actually believe it is.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 11:55 PM
4

Many (low n) women are judgy about it ime. I think red pillers tend to think that they’re only judgy to high n women because plenty of women like to police each other and one-up each other, but they’re just as judgy of high n men and players as well. They mostly just quietly avoid them though because it’s easy enough to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 08:13 PM
0

OP already gave enough reasons for why any woman may not want to repeat things that she’s done in the past, that have nothing to do with how attractive the new man is. If some men are too obtuse to see the situation with nuance but instead crash out over it because their insecurities were triggered, then the relationship was doomed anyway. Sex is probably the least of the couple’s worries. At that point it’s best for the both of them to break up. The man can go find someone who hopefully won’t t…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 07:50 PM
–

I did not move the goal post? “Marrying within the same socioeconomic bracket” means exactly what it says. You can’t just look at the older husbands’ lifelong earnings growth compared to the wives’ (because you’re accounting for all age groups with marriages, not newlywed couples) and go “that’s female hypergamy for you!” because that makes zero sense. The wife plays virtually zero role in that wealth gap other than the fact that she lost half her earnings after becoming a mom, and that’s why th…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 07:43 PM
–

Are you comparing earnings between couples that already have children together though, as in most married couples in the US? Because the primary driver of the wealth gap between men and women is that women pull back from their careers to become the primary parent. In other words there’s no evidence that most young childless women are actually choosing richer men to settle down with (actual hypergamy). The wealth gap comes after children come in the picture. The average loss of earnings for women…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 06:20 PM
0

A wall implies it’s inescapable. Average people don’t look down on their age peers for also aging, so long as they don’t let themselves go from bad habits and look bad for their age. Average men are also not out here starting serious relationships with your average college aged women, whether they’d actually want to or not. To offset the ones that do, plenty of women in their 30s+ just end up pairing off with men slightly older than themselves anyway, so it evens out. Similarly the average woman…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:52 PM
5

Because men like this look down on the women they’d want to date. It makes perfect sense tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:35 PM
4

Hot rich alpha chad is not going to commit to an average looking 22 year old. If he’s serious at all then he’s going for a Stacy. Normal women’s dating prospects aren’t changed at all. The closest thing to a real “wall” imo is when you notice how the dating pool gets smaller and it gets harder to meet new people as you grow into an adult with less free time and fewer social spaces, while there’s less single people around you to meet because more people are paired up. Those are things that actual…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 12:30 PM
8

She said they’re sought after most by people who would never take them seriously anyway. Most men and women are average looking whether they’re 22 or 32. The panic is to get women to settle early while they’re inexperienced.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 12:10 PM
1

That does certainly seem to apply to OP since he thinks in black and white. That’s hard to fix.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 11:44 AM
11

This post is so circular and ridiculous. If she wasn’t already less attracted to you because you think you’re allegedly too ugly for whatever sex act, then she’ll definitely feel less attracted to you after all this paranoid nonsense. Breaking up is best for both parties here.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:44 AM
11

The number of times I’ve heard of men turning jealous when the woman discloses that she’s seeing other men than just him…it’s absolutely a thing. Guys like OP just aren’t exposed to it. I doubt his male friends would share something like that with him, if it’s happened to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:44 AM
1

for example, if you do a reckless stunt off a bridge and end up hurting yourself, you still get ticketed or jailed, as well as have to deal with your own medical bills. Right, because the reckless stunt goes against safe driving laws, and the reason it’s against the driving laws is because it can put other innocent people in danger. The law has never had this since where the consequence of your action are severe enough you don’t get legal punishment if it’s against the law. This is actually the …
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 04:26 PM
2

I mean I don’t really disagree with anything you’ve said here. I do think a lot of people’s ideals in a partner are informed by maturity/experience, experiences from formative years, and also relatability. I notice this a lot with women too. Conventionally attractive things may be more popular, but that doesn’t mean people can’t also prefer something different. It’d be like saying people can’t genuinely prefer music other than the top10 billboard music. It just gives me pause when I see men here…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 04:04 PM
1

men in general have lower standards than women. I think we both can agree to that Yes I’m saying men have lower standards for who they’ll have sex with. Some men even string women along in dead-end relationships with women they barely tolerate, all because they don’t want to lose access to consistent sex and have to start looking for a new woman all over again. They’re apathetic in their relationships. and do you think men only realise what they find attractive after PNC lol. I’m saying that men…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 03:42 PM
2

I never said that men can’t have niche tastes as individuals? I can believe those men who say they think fat women are sexy. I’m really talking about the claim that men as individuals find a wider range of women attractive. Every man has their own ideals just like women do. So when it comes to men who aren’t experiencing sex at all and therefore can’t even experience post nut clarity, how are we supposed to take them seriously when they say they’re attracted to almost every woman? They literally…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 02:49 PM
2

Men say on here all the time that men will “fuck down” with inferior women if they’re in a frustrating dry spell. Also men getting post nut clarity would indicate that they weren’t that attracted, they were just horny and the woman they could pull was convenient enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 02:17 PM
3

The “I understand how you work” part sounds like you’re making things personal and being uncivil.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 02:01 PM
4

Exactly. The idea is that the submissive naive woman will be subservient long term the same way that the “betabux”will be.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:02 PM
2

Dealing with an abortion is already the punishment because women are automatically accountable to their own bodies, just like men are to theirs; the man who got her pregnant just doesn’t have to deal with any of that because the pregnancy isn’t in his body. No urgency or medical procedure needed for him. If getting an abortion were truly seen as a malicious act (like legal murder) then that’s the act that would be punished. It’d be like saying we should forgive people for murder if they had a tr…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 09:09 AM
–

There’s not a dating police that will force you to date someone you don’t want to date. No matter how crazy or weird the reason is, you’re not obligated to change. Do you need people to applaud you for not dating fat women? Maybe talk about it in a manosphere sub or something then, idk. And idk why we act like women don’t get shamed for any of their random preferences, you just seem to only be paying attention to the times you feel offended on behalf of men. There’s an entire culture war genre a…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 10:40 PM
8

The usual framing is that one should be legally punished and one not, but in OP’s case he thinks the “punishment” should just be scorn. It’s still the same argument though. Incest and underage pregnancies are also often just different iterations of saying that the girl/woman can’t give fully informed consent. Tomato tomato.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 10:24 PM
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Istg I wish the only thing I had to worry about around the house was making homecooked meals, op is clueless. And I say that as a lazy girl with a low standard of tidiness.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:55 PM
7

A dead bedroom doesn’t have to mean the woman was initially unattracted to the guy she chose to date and marry. Lots of things can happen over all those years that lead to that point.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:27 PM
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Ok well you don’t need to buy stuff to build intrinsic value in yourself and not depend on comparing yourself to others.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:12 PM
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Who said anything about spending money?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:00 PM
12

The apple vs orange in this case is that OP thinks women should be punished when sex is consensual, but not punished when it isn’t consensual. It makes enough sense even if it’s gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:59 PM
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Self worth doesn’t come from competing with other people. Not giving other people so much power over you will set you free.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:55 PM
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You already aren’t. You get to decide your own worth.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:00 PM
27

Whenever someone believes in exceptions (legally or morally) to abortions conceived from SA, it always begs the question: if abortions are evil, then why would you ever allow them in some circumstances? You’re clearly giving out selective sympathy, for some reason. The only explanation that ever makes sense with that kind of argument is that you only think abortions are evil because women should be punished for having consensual sex. As if having to deal with the abortion in their body is not al…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 07:48 PM
6

You are the one who brought up harassment and started questioning the choice of my words, so it's very rich of you to accuse me of talking about semantics. You opened your first comment saying “where do men say it’s ok to force women into sex act?” but the OP is not talking about force whether it’s physical/emotionally manipulative/coerceive, she described harassment. Red pill does not directly tell men it’s manly to force a woman into sex acts, but it does say it’s manly to push past women’s re…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 06:02 PM
3

Clearly you’re the bad faith person here, since I know this isn’t your first day on PPD. Peace out then✌️
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:42 PM
8

Um women already have plenty of stories exactly like this, and men justify the bad experiences as “she let it happen because he must’ve been sooo attractive.” Like actually be serious now.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:38 PM
3

How is this supporting your point? As far as I am concerned, harassment is way worse than nagging and manipulating, and my original point still stands: most men here don't believe that women should be harassed to do things that they do not want to do. Harassment is usually only verbal and doesn’t involve threats or emotional manipulation, but idk why you’re making a big point of the semantics. And to your point, red pill teaches men that it’s manly to push women’s boundaries because women are at…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:34 PM
10

How would we see examples of men heckling women in this sub for sex acts when that’s something that happens in the privacy of a relationship? I gave an example of how men here could justify why they would do such a thing, which is the belief that women will give in if she’s ~actually attracted~ to him. Even red pill teaches men that it’s manly to push women’s sexual boundaries because women will “fake” resistance as a shit test. Nothing I’m saying here is groundbreaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:22 PM
5

I didn't mention physical force here but manipulating someone to do something is forcing. Sure but in her post she didn’t describe manipulating or coercion, she described harassment. To you it might be unreasonable, to him it might be a way to filter out women who don't genuinely desire him. The point of the argument is that this isn’t a clear indicator that a woman doesn’t desire someone, not whether a man is allowed to be unreasonable. The first one is a debatable topic and the second one isn’…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:15 PM
11

In her post she gives normal reasons why someone may not be comfortable doing sex acts that they’ve tried in the past. Stuff that is common with being young and inexperienced, like being a people pleaser and struggling to assert yourself and your likes and dislikes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:08 PM
13

Nowhere in the OP did she talk about actual force or SA’ing your partner against their will, but repeatedly asking and verbally pressuring for something after someone said no, is harassment. But anyway, she’s talking about the expectation that women should behave the exact same way as they ever have in her dating lives, for no reason other than “raw attraction” (?). Something that’s not reasonable to expect of any human being, especially when men here are very open about not holding that expecta…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:00 PM
1

it tells me they don’t know how to properly be autistic about body count. And that’s a turn off. Lmaoo But in seriousness though, like you said the hyper fixation on n count signals these guys don’t know how to evaluate someone’s character and perceive things more holistically through getting to know someone organically. It unironically comes off as low class and incompetent to me and that is a turn off. I could say that about a lot of things though.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:47 PM
29

In the previous thread a common sentiment from the men was “women are more willing to make sacrifices if they’re TRULY attracted.” To justify why they don’t take women’s opinions on this seriously. And weirdly they seem to only ever say this about sexual acts. Almost like this is more about the man’s status anxiety and his comparing himself to other men, than it is do about how the woman as a human being actually feels about their relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 04:33 PM
5

The men here do not explicitly call themselves “nice guys” (tm), but what they *do* often say is “why do women here assume I’m an asshole just because I’m struggling with women? It must just be their lookism and desire for chad!” insert woman-calling-HR meme. Meanwhile these guys are always showing their ass with the dehumanizing things they write in here. We can tell they’re assholes because of *what they actually say.*
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 02:56 PM
8

I would assume the ex misused her access to those accounts, and that made him realize it’s a dumb idea to give anyone that much access to your personal money. People are allowed to make mistakes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 02:02 PM
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Take my poor woman’s gold 🏆
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:59 PM
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Uh huh
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:42 AM
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I’m just talking about you and your comment, not some kind of shadowy male cabal. Judging by how negative all your comments here are though maybe that stuff applies more to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:29 AM
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This sounds like a ploy to sabotage other men so that women don’t enjoy them in bed lol. Less competition I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:41 AM
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Sex is a mutually shared activity that two people consent to together, so both people should be considerate to each other being satisfied. Just like how two people agreeing to be in a relationship together should be considerate to each other so that they’re both satisfied with the relationship. If a woman’s not attracted to some random man that wants her, she’s not obligated to like him back because there’s no mutual consent. Men don’t have to be attracted to any particular woman, either. It jus…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:23 AM
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Idk, I’ve been here like 2 years at this point on and off, I don’t really have many negative things to say about moderation other than I think they could be more active. There is a lot of shit flinging in here but also enough good faith convos in here for me to keep coming back and feel overall positive about this place, where people can talk about controversial gender/dating topics. I can’t think of any other places where you can really do that that aren’t echo chambers.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:14 AM
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There’s definitely a lot of dumb conversations like that on here, but I feel like I still stick around because sometimes the convo is good faith enough and interesting. I get to actually exercise my brain sometimes lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:09 AM
7

Oof depending on where you live that could’ve turned into a jailable offense. I’m sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:02 AM
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I feel like pnc gets described as feeling like the dude is happy he had sex and busted a nut, but isn’t enthusiastic about the idea of sleeping with that woman for long because he thinks he could/should do better than that. Not that they think the woman is completely hideous. I’d think it’s common considering how popular of a meme it is in non controversial, mainstream online spaces. “A hole is a goal” as a popular phrase didn’t come from nowhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 11:15 PM
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I don’t relate to the people here who say they only come to this sub to vent or fight with people they don’t like. I like to debate and get more well rounded ideas, especially when this sub isn’t too circle jerky and has better discussions going on that actually make me think. It’s a well balanced community tbh, not many out there like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 11:06 PM
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Wouldn’t post nut clarity indicate that men don’t actually find as many attractive as they do when they’re just horny? Maybe that’s why it seems like the guys who feel they have more options are more picky with who they’d sleep with, compared to the many men who feel like sex is a scarce resource.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 10:32 PM
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Exactly.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 10:06 PM
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Oh maybe, I didn’t realize your flair. Motosport may be from the US like myself. Gender roles are less defined over here these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 09:04 PM
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“They just don’t get consent” is really code for “women are just dramatic, you can’t listen to what they say even when they’re clearly saying no.” That kind of dehumanization applies to so many expressions of misogyny, beyond just SA. It reminds me how it’s also so stupid when you hear the “men protecc women in society, you ladies need to be grateful!!!” shtick in this sub, when the justice systems fail the innocent straight up all the time, and there are hardly any consequences if any at all. T…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 09:02 PM
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It’s not that men dislike it, it’s just not really a requirement for women to cook now since either gender can be the cook.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 08:46 PM
1

Taste and type is one part of the equation, there’s also meeting a minimum looks threshold and also having conventionally positive/attractive behavioral traits (which often gets assumed by a guy being taken). Because attraction for women is not just based on looks, it’s also based on behavior. So if the guy in the pic was at least average or above looking, then him just simply being taken also boosts him up in attractiveness. That’s why women on here say they can still be attracted to men outsid…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 08:41 PM
1

So maybe confidence and detachment aren't actually such huge factors in why women find married men attractive. …I literally just said it’s both the things I said, not only how men carry themselves. How are women supposed to judge how a man carries himself through a picture lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 08:17 PM
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Sorry…what? Lol Men are also more competitive with each other in settings where they feel more scarcity too, like in modern dating. Does that make you feel better?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 08:13 PM
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I think it’s for both the reasons I said. Taken men both probably carry themselves differently, *and* women assume good things about them because another woman gave her approval by choosing to date him. They usually go hand in hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 08:02 PM
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I think it’s more like a feeling of scarcity breeds competition. It’s common in settings where women are the minority and feel like they have to prove themselves more to be accepted, which is the case in many workplaces.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 07:58 PM
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By positive I mean broad assumptions that the guy is competent, hardworking, stable, trustworthy, compassionate, whatever. Nothing to do with specific tastes. Whether those things are true or not, they’re common assumption. Taken/married men also receive positive bias in the workplace by their employers, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 07:45 PM
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Why not? A man who’s taken doesn’t feel mating pressure and isn’t anticipating rejection from women like a single man, so he probably comes off as more confident and detached than single men, which is attractive. Other women will assume positive things about him all because another woman seems to have already pre-vetted him, it’s like a side effect of the WAW effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 07:26 PM
2

I don't even know what that first paragraph was Men often orgasm from both PIV and oral, but not both in the same session, because men can’t usually get hard again after one orgasm. Women mostly can only orgasm from oral. A woman not finishing a bj on a man can be preferable a lot of times so that the man can still be hard enough to have PIV. The same can’t be said about men not finishing oral on women. I hope this helps you brother.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 07:02 PM
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The wedding ring effect shows this is untrue, taken men get a status boost with women that single men just don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 06:54 PM
5

Yeah it's also not common for women to stay down either..... If that’s true then it’d make sense because dudes get to come either way. If a guy finishes from a bj, he probably won’t be able to have PIV after because of men’s refractory period being longer than women’s. And yeah that is the reason... Most dudes know it's awkward to do that unless it's actually a good setting for it More excuses. If you want to please someone badly enough, you’ll go find a good setting to make it happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 06:19 PM
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There are traits where men apparently have more similar preferences to each other too, like in women’s WHR, age, and higher facial dimorphism. Clearly there’s traits where women care more and ones where men care more.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:47 PM
3

You keep implying that you’re somehow the judge of what’s too too comfortable or not, between most men and women. Even in a bedroom / non-casual setting where men have more control of their body posture, it’s not uncommon for men to NOT stay down or make women finish. The orgasm gap exists in non-casual sex for hetero couples as well. So forgive me if I think that it’s a hell of reach that men actually *really* want to go down on women during spontaneous/casual sex, if only it weren’t for an awk…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:32 PM
5

Bro how is it somehow fine and normal to you for the woman to be uncomfortable giving spontaneous head, but it’s suddenly a big deal if the man might be uncomfortable giving head?? Makes no sense at all lmao. You are literally just saying that women will tolerate discomfort in sex while men won’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:38 PM
7

Most people even women will tell you that car sex fucking sucks. I don’t like car sex either but if you’re going to be doing it anyway, then the man can make an effort to go down on the woman. PIV in a car is cramped too, but people still do it. Being horny in the moment makes people try out all kinds of things. No. It's not comfortable at all. But alot of women are more likely to do it at the heat of the moment then try to fit their legs over a guys head in a cramped as car where it's hot and g…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:29 PM
2

And that tells me you haven't had a lot of car sex. It can be EXTREMELY uncomfortable to try to lay a woman down in your back seat and eat box. Trust me. I’ve personally had no issues with doing this in a sedan, so…It does just sound like an excuse for guys who don’t really care about going down. My experience is that guys who love to eat will find ways to offer to do it even in public, especially because it’s easier to make it quieter than a blowjob. If we’re talking about going to completion a…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:14 PM
7

You think blowjobs somehow aren’t also more common in the bedroom outside of public sex..? And that just sounds like an excuse tbh, you can lay a woman down in the back of a car or on a table for example and eat her out, if you don’t have access to a bed.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:50 PM
17

Then these women should stop engaging in sex with these men. there, solved the issue. I mean that seems to already be the path women follow, considering how much complaining online you see about male sexlessness, or women choosing to stop having casual sex or stop dating when they’re not satisfied. You don't know which men are these? Have them make you orgasm first. Nothing’s stopping a guy from just coming up after like 30 seconds because he gets bored and wants his dick involved. Also a lot of…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:14 PM
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If a woman has to keep reminding her bf/husband to do xyz tasks or teaching how to do those tasks, then he’s not actually doing them. A lot of the times the woman will end up doing it so it just gets done because the man keeps putting it off. Because if it were so simple and easy, then men would just be doing these tasks already.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:06 PM
25

That can be true for you and your friend, but surveys on this stuff show that straight men receive unreciprocated oral sex more often than straight women do. The gap is probably even bigger if you just look at casual sex, because women orgasm even less during casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:45 PM
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If by baggage you mean someone who’s very unhealed and can hardly emotionally regulate themselves or not project their negativity onto you, I don’t think it’s weird to not want to date that person. Plenty of men are like this too, not just women.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:02 PM
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Most of these things can’t be robotically done on a mindless schedule let alone a consistent one. That’s not how real adult life tends to work where a lot of things are unpredictable, ambiguous, require you to adapt to external changes, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 01:31 PM
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I mean are you just gonna call it “petty logistics” when women are often more accountable to managing the grocery shopping, meal plans, errands, tracking household consumables and needed repairs, calling and scheduling plans for family gatherings, birthdays, dr’s appointments, or for dates and trips? The “emotional” part of that labor is reminding and trying to teach your partner to catch up to speed on managing these things so that you don’t have to do it alone. If that even works out. Because …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 01:21 PM
44

It probably wasn’t mentioned because it’s taken for granted.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:58 PM
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So then you’re just making a very uncharitable caricature of the kind of emotional and logistic labor women often do in relationships, and doing the opposite for men. How groundbreaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:41 PM
75

This post is also weird to me considering how much more common it is for women to give blowjobs than it is for men to go down on women. So like since when do women not care about their partners cumming during sex? The male orgasm is viewed by a lot of people as the main point of sex, with the female orgasm being just an occasional bonus.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:35 PM
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all they do is make list of things men have to do and handle petty logistics, then get stressed over it lol This is like saying that being a manager is not a real job. It’d only make sense to think that if you don’t value organizational skills needed to run a business (i.e a household or a family).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:16 PM
8

These are the types of women that rp men on here frequently call low value and “for the streets.”
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 10:57 AM
4

I don’t think there’s a single woman on this earth that literally zero men somewhere on this earth would offer to “date.” There are so many sexually desperate men out there who would take a chance at even an abusive relationship with a woman just to hopefully get regular access to a woman’s body parts, because women’s companionship generally doesn’t pose any risks to men as it does in the reverse…There are men on here who’ve admitted literally that. So it’s basically a pointless conversation. By…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:42 AM
7

because ALL men want sex. but to sit here and say that women have minimal offers for relationships while men that just want a hook up its just wrong flat out. It’s not just offers for any relationship, I’m talking about good ones where the compatibility is high, where both people work on themselves to maintain and better the relationship, the chosen partner isn’t going to be a future low-effort spouse (or parent, if they want kids), etc. Relationships are a long term investment both emotionally …
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:54 AM
8

The men that dont just want sex grows in poportion to men that just want sex. According to what? A lot of desperate/incel men here themselves admit that they view sex as harder to get (and more of an achievement) than a relationship, and they resent most committed relationships because they assume women “settle” in them. So why are we supposed to believe that more men are somehow valuing relationships with women? and thi is a weak arg8ument considering on PPD many people here have said their rel…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:12 AM
23

Men being the main pursuers (because they’re hornier) doesn’t mean that women are inundated with offers from men with good relationship intentions, it just means that women get a lot of offers for sex. That’s really it. It’s not a gendered issue to struggle to find the right kind of committed relationship for you. You guys yet again just tend to only view things through the lens of wanting easier sexual access, and that’s why y’all keep trying to compare women to millionaires. It’s a silly conve…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 02:49 AM
2

I wasn't talking to you, so how would that be relevant here? Brother we had a conversation right before you posted this 😭 Reinforces my theory that women post provocative comments on the internet for male attention at least. That’s a weirdly sexist assumption to make, like a false belief or made up fact that a religious zealot would say. Hmm.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:23 AM
1

It’s not that uncommon for some guys here to make derogatory comments on my flair even when it’s not part of the convo. It does make me feel a little special tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 12:11 AM
1

But you made this post conveniently right after our conversation where you didn’t like what I said. Hmm…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:56 PM
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No I think he’s talking about me in that same thread because I have feminist in my flair lmao.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:49 PM
2

Uh, these “low value” men post in here practically every day to tell us their objectifying opinions of women, I don’t have to make anything up. This isn’t my first day on PPD.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:23 PM
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No, but the “low value” men on here say a whole lot more than just “I want someone who values me equally” lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:14 PM
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I don’t directly engage with every low effort, virtue signally bait post I see on here, believe it or not. But here I’ll answer you. Objectification is when you see someone as only a tool to meet your own needs, and can’t recognize them as being humans with their own agency and self-determined desires.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 11:10 PM
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There are lots of ways that men on here objectify women that have nothing to do with using prostitutes. It sounds like you and the OP just don’t really understand what objectification is.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:52 PM
0

For men, its being beautiful (height, looks, penis size, er ) and even their personality should not give a hint of mysogyny even if he just hates any sexism, against both men and women. How do we know that it’s the same women holding all these standards all at once? Like some women really want a tall man but have a lower bar for what behavior they consider misogynistic / undateable. Some women want big dicks or guy who’s cute and broad shouldered, but don’t really care for a guy to be tall. And …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 10:32 PM
1

One of my friends is a size queen and she usually just blatantly asks them early in the talking stage. When she used to not ask, she would just hook up with them to find out, and if she wasn’t happy with it she just wouldn’t hook up with them again. That got annoying for her which is why she asks up front now.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 09:52 PM
-1

A shorter man struggling to date doesn’t mean he’s struggling specifically *because* he’s short, depending on how below avg his height is. Also for small boobs, men tend to admit that there’s caveats to it like as long as the woman has a pretty face / is skinny or fit / has a nice ass or hips etc. that usually don’t apply to women with bigger boobs. Because people are made up of a whole bunch of traits. The same kind of rule applies to men who aren’t tall, or really to people with any trait that…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 07:51 PM
0

Many women have a “just be taller than me” standard in the same way many men have a “as long as she has boobs at all” standard. Which makes sense because those are both equally basic dimorphic traits. The people who prefer the extremes (very tall men or bigger boobs) are just vocal about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 07:11 PM
2

Oh I’ve gotten pushback on it here before, it’s too early to say that lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 05:45 PM
2

I’d say he’s definitely above average. I’m also partial to dark hair/eyes and stubble like that, sooo..
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:39 PM
2

Get genuinely mad? Maybe, but there doesn’t seem to be as many of them as there are men obsessing over rating people. I think women think of looks more in terms of hot vs. not-hot and it’s more fluid and vibes based, while men think more rigidly and hierarchically about it. Men who are into this stuff seem to get very rigid and dogmatic over it, and can’t tolerate disagreement. I also do think a lot of women genuinely can’t see what a woman sees in the man she’s dating, because when it comes to …
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 04:09 PM
1

A lot of women view height the way a lot of men view boobs. The ones who care tend to be really vocal about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:55 PM
6

Basically yeah.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:50 PM
1

Status to me is just whatever makes you impressive or cool to other people, so it’s usually very context dependent.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:45 PM
2

The woman dating him probably wouldn’t call him mid. Guys can easily be hot to one woman and mid to another, it’s never that serious. You also almost never see women rating people with the 1-10 scale trying to act like attraction is totally objective, either. Men tend to be the ones more into hierarchies like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:34 PM
–

DINKs would be the ultimate fiscal responsibility then tbh.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 08:55 PM
3

I think it’s probably equal, but men and women put more weight on different traits than each other. I think facial features are one of the areas where women have a broader range of what they find attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:57 PM
1

Looks dominate womens value on the market. That is not the case for men. Looks determine how hot of a person you can pull, but not how much other people will like you and respect you past the first impression stage. A lot of women figure this out sometime in their 20s. You mean women? Nope, a lot of (non red pill) men in this sub have said the same thing. Oh, you don't? I think it’s very drastic. Maybe you think so because it seems your only standards for women is for them to be pretty, so of co…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:09 PM
–

Being intensely focused on your looks is also a way to guarantee you won’t have to work your social muscles or risk rejection. Blaming your looks is the path of least resistance.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:16 AM
2

Do you deny this? Looks are what get your foot in the door for everyone, sure. But for a lot of people it’s not enough to just meet a looks threshold, they also want to think you’re impressive. At least that seems to be true for people who don’t have a scarcity mindset. So which is it, do you agree that i have to worry about more stuff than women, or not? I don’t think the difference in expectation between men and women is so drastic, so long as the man in question isn’t wanting a woman to “just…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:10 AM
2

Huge numbers of men rarely "approach" women and so they aren't in the market at all Ok sure but that still impacts how many men are approaching women, and how women perceive dating. Everyone is always choosing something, and it reflects in the dating landscape. If women choose to be single and avoid men, that also impacts dating. I can't rely on my body for currency. I also have to be entertaining, funny, ambitious, extroverted, flirtatious, bold, so many things. She just has to be pretty. Sound…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:12 AM
2

I don’t agree that the average person has bad symmetry and bad bone structure. Straight up look at the progress pics and look at people go from meh looking to hot, mainly from body recomp.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:42 AM
3

Well you implied that you being a man feel superior to any woman you have to impress, because she didn’t have to do that. But if you still want those women and don’t expect to be impressed by her either, then how are you superior? The market doesn't determine how, when or the intensity with which men chase women. Men are half the dating market…they are choosing what they prioritize all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:39 AM
1

Go in the progress pics sub and look at people who’ve transformed into being truly low bodyfat, and notice how dramatically their faces changed and became sculpted. Face fat obscures most people’s facial features even if they’re at normal weights. No, it’s just ugly women that think odd looking men are attractive because they themselves are also odd looking. You’re just agreeing with me that attractiveness is subjective lol
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 02:31 AM
3

If two people equally choose each other then neither is “superior”, especially since men and women don’t always prioritize the exact same traits in each other. You would chase more impressive women if that’s what you were into. How else do you think market *value* even works?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 01:31 AM
0

I don’t really see regular people walking around with noticeably asymmetric faces, no. Like I said the guy in the pic being very lean is doing most of the heavy lifting for his looks. That’s a creative insult though. Probably just goes to show that a lot of what people find attractive is still pretty subjective, past a baseline.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:47 AM
3

It spits out a gigachad 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:38 AM
1

I don’t think you actually read my whole comment.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:24 AM
2

I agree with all that. When I think of “average” in faces I’m thinking of a wide range where there’s maybe 1-2 features that stand out as a flaw or 1-2 that are eye catching, with everything else looking pretty normal. I think that fits the vast majority of people you see outside.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 12:09 AM
1

That’s so real tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 11:39 PM
1

Being that lean makes everyone’s facial features look much better, and the avg person is nowhere near that level of leanness. So yeah I’d agree he’s pretty good looking overall. By saying his face is average I mean his actual features are pretty standard looking, nothing exactly stands out. If he had more face fat I think he’d blend right in with other avg people. At least where I live. I’m a big believer in that most people can look pretty hot if they have a good body comp, and a close 2nd plac…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 11:04 PM
0

Judging by his traps and shoulders yes he looks like he’s muscular, and his face and neck obviously also show he’s lean. A lot of normal people get much hotter when they get to a good body composition.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 09:58 PM
0

I’d say his face looks average, but he’s also hot imo because he’s clearly lean and muscular. Average people can definitely be hot when they look like they take care of themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 09:34 PM
2

A easily, 5’7” is not too short to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:16 PM
1

That’s a crazy take, not uncommon for a lot of the people in this sub, but at least you’re consistent with it lol
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 08:26 PM
2

That just sounds even worse. If a man cheats on me or abuses me but as long as I don’t kill him or myself afterwards, that means I wasn’t as victimized? Suicide is always the (emotional) choice of the person committing it. Nobody else is responsible for that unless they’re taunting you to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:54 PM
2

Do you think men’s disproportionate rate of completed suicides are from men killing someone assaulting them before they turn the violence on themselves? Really?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:42 PM
1

I’m sorry, in what way are men being externally influenced to commit murder-suicides? As if the choice to murder someone isn’t an emotional choice that that person makes?? And the same for suicides?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:36 PM
–

Here I’ll just gender swap this for you. If women’s higher rates of mental illness is just women being “biologically” neurotic, then men similarly doing risky things when mentally ill (like drunk driving, using weapons, murder-suicides, etc.) is just men being “biologically” dangerous. Right? Yet in this thread you’ve argued that men “objectively” have it worse. Why can’t we just blame men’s biology the same way you’re blaming women’s? Why are men the bigger victims?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:26 PM
–

You need labels and definitions to be able to distinguish what “neurotic” even means, dude. That’s how language works, you can’t just pick your gender war arguments based on vibes.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 07:13 PM
–

You’re saying girls are just born mentally ill? No life experiences can contribute to being diagnosed with a mental illness? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:56 PM
4

Women already care about those things too. Men’s height to women is pretty much how men view breast size. It’s a way closer comparison.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:36 PM
–

The argument in the OP wasn’t who completes more suicides, it was “who has a harder life.” Which is a silly and impractical conversation anyway, but whatever. Your response to OP seems to be arguing that since men more often complete suicides, then that means men actually have harder lives. But anyone could similarly argue that being more “neurotic” is evidence that your life is harder. Do you see the problem?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:25 PM
–

Men and women have been shown to deal with depression/anxiety differently, with men being more physically restless and likely to engage in risky activities (like reckless driving, gambling, alcohol/drug abuse, gun violence) while women engage in more rumination behaviors. It’s probably debatable whether or not women are more often depressed because they just seek diagnosis more often / depression diagnosis criteria is seen through traits more typical in women, or if it’s because women actually a…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:12 PM
2

Exactly. I’m not interested in guys who don’t align with my lifestyle values, but I don’t hyperfixate on n count let alone need to ask about it to figure out that certain guys are just not my match.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 03:06 PM
2

Everyone picks and chooses which norms they want to keep in their relationships that make sense for them, that’s what freedom from forced roles enables you to do. You want a gf who likes to cook because you don’t like cooking? That’s fine as long as both you and the woman are on board with it, and it works for you guys. A woman wants a man with some provider traits because she prefers domestic roles or wants babies? That’s fine too if they’re both on board. I don’t see how expecting women to be …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 03:02 PM
7

Lesbians are given the erasure treatment constantly and assumed to be going through a man-hating phase. Sex with women isn’t seen as something that affects you positively, it’s seen as frivolous. Like something that can be made into pawns for status competitions between men. Just like how nobody believes men are positively improved if they go see a female sex worker, people think men will “ruin” you if you sleep with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 11:38 PM
3

Do you not have a honeymoon phase early on with the women you date in relationships? Because obviously casual flings tend to be short term for a reason.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 11:06 PM
8

If that were true then lesbians would be pedestalized, but they’re not. It’s more like men are seen as conquerors, competing in a male hierarchy. That’s why both women and gay men (especially bottoms) get more stigma for having sex, why women are assumed to take men’s last names in marriage, etc. Lesbian attraction is downplayed and seen as less legitimate than gay men’s attraction because if a man isn’t involved, well then it must be unserious.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 11:02 PM
2

All I did was add on to what you said. I just did, though. And I'm right. Just like your preferences, you’re also entitled to have opinions lol
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 07:43 PM
5

Everyone’s entitled to their preferences, not just men. And unfortunately for red pillers nobody can speak for half the population either.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 07:30 PM
7

No you shouldn’t “default” to either, but I think a lot of progressive minded people are more hesitant to assume any random thing is “caused by nature” because naturalistic arguments have been used to justify all kinds of horrible, cruel things throughout history (before eventually being debunked). And not just in regards to gender issues. People seem to be more tolerant to naturalistic arguments if it argues in favor of a group they belong to. Paying more attention to the nurture side at least …
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:41 PM
8

Sure but unless you can control for determining how much any of those differences are influenced by material conditions and resulting culture, it’s hasty to assume that certain differences are caused by biology. This is what nature vs nurture debates that scientists have with each other are even about. It’s impossible to completely separate them, so anyone serious about the topic needs to be really mindful of that.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 05:20 PM
7

No? Sex hormones also create some differences in the brain too, to some extent. The problems start when people over extrapolate what they think these hormonal or anatomical differences should “naturally” cause, especially when there’s not any solid, properly variable-controlled scientific evidence to support it, so they mix up nature and nurture. That’s when people’s beliefs can veer into gender essentialism.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 04:55 PM
5

You could ask feminist reddit subs I guess, if you’re trying to get feminists’ opinions.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 02:19 PM
16

Probably? This isn’t something I see people really care to talk about offline, but yeah to me it’s just common sense. Women are generally more cautious because we incur more risks.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 02:11 PM
62

Pregnancy, motherhood, and all their consequences on women (both biologically and socially) have always been a big topic in feminism, including up to now. I’ve been even saying this stuff all the time here to the men who think women are more cautious/selective for seemingly “no reason” other than that women are greedy “hypergamous” whores and that men are purely victims in dating, lol. I think this is a strange question to ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 02:06 PM
4

It’s real ragebait hours, just gotta wait it out
/r/PurplePillDebate09/05/26 01:39 AM
3

No that’s way too much
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 09:03 PM
1

Yes lol
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 08:25 PM
3

Why does this image feel like AI
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 08:22 PM
6

A lot of times in this sub when I’ve seen RP men link a study of “proof” that women actually prefer insert whatever “bad” trait (like dark triad for example) in men, the study is never actually pointing to what the RP man is claiming. They misinterpret a lot of these attraction studies, probably because they’re either not too scientifically literate, or because they’re just really eager to skim an article or headline that they perceive to agree with something they already believed in. Or some mi…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 01:53 AM
2

I’ve seen posts get removed before specifically for being internal questions, I’m not sure where in the sub rules it’s written though.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 01:26 AM
4

For me it seems to depend on how quickly a guy shows a lot of signs of being my type. Like for some men it’s been instant because they already look like the archetype of a previous guy I’ve already been attracted to, I guess. And these are typically very normal looking guys too; type for many women I know is not the same as being conventionally hot: a 6 that’s my type is hotter to me than an 8 who’s not. So it’s like I start assuming all kinds of attractive things about them, until they prove me…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 01:23 AM
3

I’m pretty sure internal questions (such as men asking men) are against sub rules because it leads to circlejerking. This will probably get taken down.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/05/26 01:00 AM
3

Being “wealthy” can mean something as simple as your parents being still alive and owning a home with an extra room for you to comfortably live in, and not needing you to pay rent to them. I can tell you didn’t grow up around many poor people. People grow up and think I wanna do XYZ as a career but then reality often hits them in the face. The same way people think I wanna date XYZ, but then reality also hits them in the face. Ok yet in all cases for dating, everyone has the luxury of time to be…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 11:34 PM
2

Ok? Survivorship bias much? Yeah if your parents are wealthy and generous enough to fund you and let you live in their house for example, unemployment might be less terrifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 11:27 PM
3

I don’t have arthritis but whenever I get random pains or sprains (usually from the gym) I use a red light + NIR device on it, and it works soo well to heal things quickly. There’s a lot of research on how certain long wavelength light works directly on mitochondria to heal all kinds of problems, I’d bet arthritis falls into them. Highly recommended it if you can find an affordable device. DYOR of course.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 11:20 PM
5

You have immediate survival threats if you can’t get a job. Homelessness, starvation, jail time for not being able to pay bills or fines, etc. It’s like the guys here who compare relationships to jobs have never heard of Maslow’s hierarchy.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 11:10 PM
3

What, you see women here saying “my exes were really hot but my hubby is a sexual downgrade”? Really? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:55 PM
–

Say that shit louderrr. The random looks shaming that the men put out in here is everywhere.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:38 PM
3

I don’t think these random men have any clue about why or under what circumstances a woman slept with the men that she once did, or which traits she thinks are better or worse…These guys are cooking up this stuff in their own imaginations to get mad about.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:35 PM
–

What did that guy “whine” about? You just attacked him because you didn’t like his flair lol. You might be the whiny one here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:31 PM
4

She’s probably not, because I’ve seen men here say that to women only because they’ve slept with other men before they’d met their husbands. It’s very weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:26 PM
3

What??
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 10:22 PM
–

How are we supposed to answer this question or know how reliable of a narrator you are if there’s no linked post? Did you mean to post this to r/amitheangel? I mostly say this because so freaking often ppd men will call it “gaslighting” whenever a woman simply has a different opinion than them in here. It’s really annoying to see the men in here constantly misuse this therapyspeak, so I wouldn’t expect a lot women here to be charitable to your post.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:43 PM
1

Moderators of a sub or any online space have full control of who they allow to come in and what rules people have to follow. Idk which “men’s space” you’re talking about but you should probably ask their mods why they allow women to debate in there then.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:37 PM
–

Even if this were true, do dating opinions in here only matter if they’re skinny young Stacies? A very small minority of the dating population? Next time I think to argue with a man’s opinion in here maybe I should ask him if he’s a tall fit Chad first lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:09 PM
–

Ayy good for you! The whole “everyone I argue with must be ugly” thing some men say in here is so dumb. Not because anyone should feel obligated to post pics especially if they prefer to stay anonymous, but it always comes off as cope to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:01 PM
28

Exactly. It’s a silly question every time it comes up.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 08:21 PM
3

This sub was made specifically for debate, ppd isn’t a manosphere safe space lol. Of course women are allowed to argue with them here.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 08:16 PM
–

Men can harass you online outside of this sub for saying/doing much tamer shit than calling them ugly. Ask me how I know.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 08:09 PM
1

Very funny that you're so open and accepting of all this, 'of course men have to fulfil their gender roles' the feminist says, unwittingly enforcing the gender-roled patriarchy they claim to hate. I’m explaining to you why the supply and demand is the way that it is, nobody “has to” do any actions in particular because every woman has a different idea of what she looks for in a man showing he’s “competent” enough to want to date or sleep with him. Patriarchy is specifically when men have authori…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 07:09 PM
14

A lot of men in this sub specifically think having a higher n count is gross for women but good for men. “Because it’s harder for men to get sex” blah blah. Both the virgin/low n and high n (red pill leaning) men here tend to be united in really disliking higher n women, and they’re loud about it. The gender reverse of this double standard isn’t a thing. The women here are more consistent in being either against casual sex for everyone (according to a lot of the low n women here), or consistentl…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 05:17 PM
8

😭
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 09:02 AM
1

Who is the one who is expected to pursue, to sweep people off their feet, to plan dates, to pay, to do romantic gestures? Men. Women rarely put any effort in, and there's no pressure on them to do it. Again you are picking and choosing. Of course in the courting phase, there’s more burden on men to perform to show he’s a catch and not low-effort, to make her see him as lower risk and higher reward just like how he already sees her. That’s why they “do more” in the beginning. Men largely do those…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 08:37 AM
2

Attractive women are also deemed less trustworthy and more deserving of being fired, especially in male-dominated fields and in managerial positions (i.e the types of jobs that usually pay more, hmm). Interestingly I can only find research on beauty being a double edged sword for attractive women, but not for attractive men. Maybe it’s because men are valued for a lot more than their appearance, so they don’t have to deal with that double bind.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 01:47 AM
2

If they are in a place of actually asking for advice, I’d never give it from a place of “you’re too picky” because there’s no such thing as too picky when it comes to a voluntary activity. It’s also a very consequential decision to choose to entangle your life with someone, so who am I to judge what someone should want? Even if I personally wouldn’t have the same standards. It’s their life, I don’t expect other people to want the same exact qualities as I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 01:08 AM
3

There’s no scientific basis for men to be “more romantic” than women, men are literally just hornier. It’s a basic hormonal difference. How come I can’t just argue that women are “more romantic” because women care more about long term relationship potential while men think more in short term? You can pick and choose any argument that makes you feel better than the opposite sex. So you’re unironically just crafting your own gender superiority story, like calling men superior to their female partn…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 01:00 AM
2

You’re completely missing the point, and only looking at dating from the male pov. Men pursue more because they want women more. If the cost-benefit analysis were worse for men, then women would approach more instead. Women would be the ones unhappier single, and gain a bigger happiness boost when married vs. widowed or divorced. Maybe men would even be the ones dealing with pregnancy and sacrificing their earning potential to become parents instead, too; Women aren’t holding men at gunpoint or …
/r/PurplePillDebate07/05/26 12:08 AM
1

I’d say only do it if he genuinely wants to dress better and isn’t only interested in going to spend the time with you. If he does want to dress better then that’ll actually help him in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 11:39 PM
2

Women aren’t pickier and less desperate for no reason; men have more to gain and less to lose in hetero relationships than women do, and that’s why women are compelled to be more cautious and care more about vetting and compatibility. Women’s burden generally is based in our reproductive realities, and men by contrast are hornier and therefore have a higher barrier to entry. So in that really basic way, the sexes are balanced.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 11:29 PM
2

You need compatibility in a relationship or else it’ll just fall apart. Vetting is how you figure out that compatibility. Women are compelled to do more of it though because women generally have more risks in hetero relationships. Men don’t care as much.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 11:03 PM
4

Giving out compliments is goated. So many people only have something to say when they have criticism, so I try to counteract that whenever I can even though I’m introverted. It feels good and it makes life a lot better!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 09:17 PM
6

Prioritizing character gets called betabuxxing though. That’s why “choose better” coming from random men online shouting in the wind often just means “women bad,” because in these dudes’ heads any choice women make is the wrong one. Often because they haven’t been picked.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 08:46 PM
3

I still don’t see how a higher n count woman is any more likely to view you as a ticket to stability than a lower n count one would. Nevermind what “high” or “low” even mean. Because again I’m pretty sure lower n count women would place more emphasis on a guy’s stability traits than a higher n count woman would. Going by how I’d compare the dating habits of women I know irl. It’s a silly conversation. Again I’d say your problems are bigger if this is what you’re fixated on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 08:31 PM
5

Being pretty doesn’t actually mean men will treat you better in a relationship, a lot of women figure this out by high school or college ime. The bottleneck of many women’s problems is in vetting because that’s where women have more of the dating burden.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 07:39 PM
5

you’re giving women all the slack yet or still saying men shouldn’t get the same. Please quote me because I don’t follow what you’re accusing me of. To me it sounds you’re giving red pillers an excuse to not have to integrate their middle school aged experiences? They formed an entire philosophy for it, and it’s even mainstream now to know what AFBB is. I see women on the sub all the time call out dudes who are literally 20, so two years removed from being a child, as if they should somehow alre…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 07:08 PM
14

So which is it? Should children not believe in fairytales on dating and be cynical from the start, or should everybody, including men have the ability to grow and learn and not be judged for it Children do not date. Most people learn at some point in their adolescence that other kids can be mean to you, think you’re ugly or uncool, compare you to others, etc. This is a healthy milestone to learn before you start trying to date anyone, so that it can be integrated in a nuanced way. Because life i…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 06:10 PM
3

Women have cooties, don’t go near them!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 05:43 PM
4

Of course I have a past, I’m an adult and not a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 05:40 PM
6

A woman being a virgin or “low” n count doesn’t mean she’s attracted to you though? You think virgin women don’t also want stability in a partner? Hell they probably prioritize it even more than other women. And you don’t have to act like an “oofy doofy” or whatever that means to you, you have agency over your own behavior. It’s called having boundaries.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 05:39 PM
5

You need someone’s n count to figure out if they’re feeling attracted to you? I don’t think it works that way. I’d say you have bigger problems if that’s how you’re trying to figure out if she’s turned on by you.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 05:04 PM
7

What is a “heavy” past? Past a certain age, everyone has a collection of past pains and experiences that color who they currently are, for better or worse. Many RP men themselves are jaded, suspicious, and negative; does that not count as a “heavy past”? Anyway that’s where compatibility is relevant. People tend to match up with other people with similar amounts of baggage. People already mate assortatively.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:51 PM
11

The whole point of dating is getting to know someone’s character, values, and feelings towards you in real time, to see if you both want the same things moving forward. That’s what compatibility is. Expecting women to be the same exact person their entire lives and not caring about getting to know them as who they currently are is treating women like NPCs.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:40 PM
7

Trial and error =/= trading up attraction for stability, i.e AFBB. I know red pill struggles to not think in black and white though.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:27 PM
32

Seriously. It’s like they think women should just be born already knowing all the perfect vetting practices and life wisdom, holding women up to an expectation to either be perfect angel disney princesses, or cold “hypergamous” villains. Like somehow men are given the grace to learn in life through trial and error like a normal human being, but women aren’t? They assign women hyperagency when it suits them, and try to reduce our agency when it doesn’t (yes you can gender swap this argument too).…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 04:18 PM
1

I mean that kinda makes sense. I’m not so into beards that look more grown out, to me it usually looks untidy or a little much. I think shadow or short facial hair is hottest because it shows that a guy pays attention to detail and his hygiene, but it’s still masculine looking. Less is more!
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 03:45 PM
1

You don’t have to dress like a caricature or a “goth freak” lol, it’s called having some style and expressing your personality through styling and how you carry yourself. Don’t dress alternative if it doesn’t fit your interests and personality. You’re always communicating something about yourself in how you present yourself though, so it’s very relevant to first impressions. Also the HOTTEST men I know dress "normal" That’s cool and all but I’m not talking about the hottest guys you know, I’m ta…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/05/26 03:23 PM
4

most women* ftfy Do you not know what “average” means? Lol Because other than through the coombrain of some men I just cannot see how any other "aesthetic" can significantly rescue lack of attractiveness. I’ve seen a lot of normal looking guys get thirsted after just because they fit into some romanticized aesthetic. Cowboy types, lumberjacks, tattooed or alt aesthetics, SE asian guys with a kpop look, just anything that could be considered cool in its own subculture. Because news flash, women a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 05:06 PM
2

Most people are average looking or can easily become average looking. There’s a lot you can work with there, like playing up your strengths. And idk why you’re bringing up weird fetishes? I’m saying an average looking person can cater to a certain aesthetic or subculture etc., and as a result become really appealing to certain people. Nobody needs to be universally appealing.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:52 PM
2

Most people don’t have perfect supermodel tier faces though. Normal looking people can be perceived as really hot to a smaller group if they fit into a certain niche/fantasy. That’s really what types are.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:30 PM
2

This one’s so poorly done lmao
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 04:02 PM
3

Chad irl is just whoever’s risk taking, aggressive, and non picky enough to approach a lot of women. He’ll find women who say yes, he doesn’t need to be hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 03:18 AM
1

Whichever one hurts your feelings the most is the correct type. Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 03:04 AM
1

Oh interesting yeah it is like we are kinda mirrored types. I could only assume that we have a similar perspective but you cope by dominating others as an 8? And I’ve struggled to not let other people dominate me in relationships because I can be too accommodating. Original red pill was weird af for me to read about because they always describe the women’s “female nature” as traits that sounded more like specific enneagram type neuroses lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 03:02 AM
2

I’m American too and yeah I agree. I think enneagram and stuff like that is work that’s too internal focused for it to have a huge PR campaign, like with what can be done with feminist/economic issues that affect people’s material conditions. Because there’s more urgency and consequences there. Or idk maybe I’m thinking too small. Maybe we should start beating people over the head on social media posts like “hey 8s, have you practiced being vulnerable with anyone today? Stop trying to act hard a…
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:50 AM
0

I’m INTP! I’ve been in the typology space for a really long time. As a 9 I was always the family peacemaker, hardly ever spoke up for myself, and struggled with being a doormat. I’ve dated a 7, then a 4, and now my current relationship is with another sp 9w1 lol 😆 we’re like two peas in a pod. I discovered enneagram before my current relationship and I actually use it a lot to communicate issues going on in a way that makes confrontation less scary. It’s also easier to be compassionate and work …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:36 AM
1

Not sure what you mean. I think stuff like enneagram is really useful for self awareness, healing and handling relationships though. To me as a leftist, feminism is really about economic issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:26 AM
1

Same for me 🧐
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:18 AM
1

Ooo interesting what subtype? I’m 954 so almost the same tritype lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:14 AM
1

I love all kinds of personality stuff for that reason, there’s so much depth. What is your enneagram?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 02:11 AM
1

I’m a self pres 9 so I’m practically the opposite. On a side note I do wish more people here talked about enneagram though. It’s way more insightful than trying to put people into gendered boxes.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/05/26 01:44 AM
5

I feel like it’s probably because those subs are sausage fests.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 11:06 PM
3

I get the sentiment but it’s really silly to assign morality to things like body fat %, let alone consensual sex. Nobody wants to be fat, and food issues are way more complicated than that. Also you know no one actually cares about “gluttony” because we all know it isn’t fat people who are hoarding food from the needy. People just want to shit on people they find unattractive lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 10:41 PM
1

OP didn’t say if the women said their sex lives were always bad though. You’re assuming a lot based on very little info.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 09:20 PM
2

You’re the one who said most women marry men they’re not attracted to, so you already fabricated your own story. Unless you’ve got evidence for your claim?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 09:14 PM
1

Based on what? Or are you just venting your feelings here
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 08:55 PM
2

If the sex used to be fun but then it became a chore, then it’s probably not because she originally found him unattractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 08:35 PM
2

There’s probably a lot more variables that lead to a bad sex life than “women are choosing to marry men they’re not attracted.”
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 08:18 PM
1

First kiss and first relationship when I was 15. I’m on my 3rd relationship (going on 7 years together), and the longest I’ve been single was like 3 years. Sex and dating aren’t unimportant, but when I was single I wasn’t really thinking about them much at all I guess. My life always revolved around my hobbies and my friends, and I met the guys I dated along the way while living my life anyways.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 07:52 PM
3

Definitely fooled me 😬
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 07:35 PM
5

Well if you’re aware of south korean beauty standards, she fits them pretty head on.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 02:20 PM
9

Bro I’m pretty sure the woman in the pic is a kpop idol. It’s their job to look hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 02:14 PM
–

Manosphere content to me seems to be anything revolving around “female nature” and how to deal with women based on those beliefs. So yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 02:12 PM
4

There’s nothing more offensive than a woman not giving dudes a boner. Straight men’s amygdalas literally light up more when they look at unattractive people of the opposite sex. It’s like these guys believe they need to become attractive to most women because they think most women exist to turn them on.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 02:06 PM
7

“The average woman”
/r/PurplePillDebate04/05/26 02:01 PM
1

1000%
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 08:20 PM
2

Putting pussy on the pedestal final boss
/r/PurplePillDebate02/05/26 07:19 PM
–

I’m INTP and my fiance is INFJ. I’ve noticed I tend to be into IxFx men, in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 11:02 PM
–

People who are into mbti: what type are you, and if you also have a partner what’s their type? I’m just curious
/r/PurplePillDebate01/05/26 11:00 PM
1

Whatever you wanna tell yourself lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 09:38 PM
2

Straight up everyone in this thread corrected OP, including women who flair as trad or red pill. Clearly the women in this sub know what that term actually means.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 09:20 PM
3

Some women online do misuse the term to bully other women for random preferences like in their fashion and hobbies or w/e, but that tiktok trend is relatively new and a lot of women have pointed out that it’s a bastardization of what pickme has always specifically meant: a woman who belittles other women to look good in front of men. Maybe this helps you.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 09:11 PM
3

Bro everyone in this thread is giving OP the same definition, she didn’t make it up. That’s the original meaning of the term, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 09:01 PM
6

I never said most men, I just said I’ve noticed a lot. I’m sure it depends heavily on what kind of men you surround yourself with. If you don’t care, I’m sure the men around you probably don’t either.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 08:44 PM
9

I’m not talking about you in particular, and neither of us know “most” men anyway. I’ve witnessed plenty of men who look down on women who are catty towards other women. Those aren’t the men that tend to date pickmes.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 08:30 PM
10

Pickmes aren’t just easygoing in front of men, they struggle with female friendships because they’re catty with other women. It’s not a good look.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 08:16 PM
11

Nah, I think it’s more like pickme women more often attract the kind of men that’ll take advantage of them. A lot of men actually look down on pickme women, and don’t want to date them. Those women are usually nice on the surface, but a lot of people can see through them.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:03 PM
1

Interesting, never really thought of how people could easily meet off of reddit, but then again I don’t really comment anywhere on here unless it’s for debates, lol. Surely even reddit is probably better than a lot of the apps out there though.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 07:00 PM
1

That’s wild. Is that how y’all met? Or did that come later
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:10 PM
1

Surely it’s not a coincidence, did you tell her about the sub?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 06:01 PM
1

I’m obviously not RPW, but I have a theory about red pill for women. I feel like RPW and FDS type content (pink pill?) are like the two opposite styles that make up the women’s red pill universe. Then there’s the men’s red pill, which seems to encompass both styles of thought. Like the difference seems that RPW is focused on seduction and trying to maximize the number of men you could appeal to so you have more romantic leverage that way, while FDS is more hyper independent and about making sure…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 05:52 PM
2

💀
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 04:53 PM
1

I feel like he would unironically post something like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 04:51 PM
1

I mean the current bf might just phase out of the group because he’s mostly here only because he started dating her, but I guess it’d have to be his decision. I can’t imagine the new guy having an issue either way, I think. We’re all closer to her than either of the men. Her previous ex bf that she dated for like 4 years stayed somewhat in the group, but slowly faded out when she started to talk to new guys. So I feel like it could end up with him just leaving.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 04:38 PM
1

It’s just sad because the rest of us mostly like him and he’s overall a chill and nice dude, but he says some stuff that’s kinda weird and offensive here and there in a joking tone and his gf always tells him that it bothers her. But it’s like he thinks she’s play fighting or just nagging him? Things are still unfolding but from the sounds of how the conversation went, he feels bad and wants to work things out. I think he might actually take her seriously now and try to change, but another frien…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 04:27 PM
1

One iffy comment isn’t so bad if it doesn’t trend with the rest of your behavior and personality. Unfortunately his new behavior is tracking with the new things he’s been saying. And idk how the tiktok algorithms really work let alone the manosphere-ish ones, but he’s blatantly said that he’s into looksmaxxing content and he follows everything about clavicular’s life, lol. So his feed is probably much more than just fitness content.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 04:11 PM
2

Do you ever wonder if anyone you know irl browses this sub? Or is this place too niche and uncool.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:59 PM
4

Sure dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:52 PM
-1

They had a strong honeymoon phase where they were constantly fucking, so I think she desired him just fine. Relationships can change over time especially as the novelty wears off.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:47 PM
1

26
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:30 PM
2

She just moved in with him tbf, but yeah a year is still too early imo. Now she’s kinda stuck.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:26 PM
2

Tbf that’s like the one time I can think of where he said anything blatantly red pill, but he says other things here and there that are like really unsympathetic and borderline sociopathic. He’s not autistic or anything but it comes off as like un self aware rather than like, malicious. And their relationship started out happy and passionate, but I think he’s always been a little insecure of the fact that my friend kinda has more of her shit together financially, so sometimes she’s had to help h…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:23 PM
5

So one of my close friends has been dating this guy for like a year, but in recent months he’s fallen down the looksmaxxing / manosphere / rp tiktok hole and he’s started acting more like an asshole to his gf when originally he was a nice and chill guy. He’s even said to us before that “women only respect you if you’re a little mean to them” or w/e so clearly this seems related to the content he’s consuming lately. He’s overall a good dude imo, but he’s definitely impressionable. Anyways they’ve…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 03:01 PM
0

Yes, and that is different from the 'hey, you didn't quite succeed this time, let's adjust' that the RP provides. Right, this is you giving the most charitable representation of red pillers’ advice, ignoring any times red pillers use JWF (let alone any other common fallacies), because you already agree with them. You are picking and choosing. 'You fail with women? You must secretly be sexist or an Incel' is what the Bluepill will peddle, and an example of the Just World Fallcy. …And similarly th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 02:26 PM
0

Redpill has no 'just world fallacy' to fall into. It is acknowledging that the world is unjust — life is what it is — and that the most logical choice is to 'metagame' the system to your advantage. I already described how the “meta game” red pill prescribes is that a man can either be alpha or beta. JWF is the belief that everything good or bad is deserved, so you can basically always find a way to victim blame. Red pillers in this sub frequently victim blame men by saying they face failures sim…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/04/26 02:34 AM
2

Based and pickle pilled
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:42 PM
11

Well birds can fly really high, that’s probably how they can see all the evil things women do in secret. Checkmate, females.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:33 PM
8

Science is dumb, I’d rather pick out my own conclusions. I bet those based birds have figured out that women are evil /s
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:24 PM
4

“Be confident and assertive” is neither unique nor central to the red pill. Red pill is much more explicit than that, and says that women are only attracted to “alpha”/dominant traits. Meanwhile you can be a confident person who doesn’t dominate other people in a social dynamic. A lot of women can find “dominant” traits to come off as aggressive, and for example there are different studies on how women find men less attractive if the men are portrayed as aggressive, or even hyper masculine. Also…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 11:09 PM
2

<image>
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 10:32 PM
2

It Won’t Happen But Just Imagine
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 10:28 PM
-3

Just world fallacy doesn’t belong to any ideology, it’s a fallacy anyone can use to defend whatever they want. Red pillers often use their own form of JWF. If you’re a simp/beta and your relationship fails, it’s because you weren’t alpha enough / you didn’t really believe in red pill hard enough. And if a woman’s attracted to you, it must be because you embody the red pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 08:55 PM
3

That’s what red pillers call blue pill. It’s like asking a cultist to tell you what the non-believers believe in, lol. The Matrix is literally about a conspiracy, of course real life “blue pillers” don’t agree that dating culture is a conspiracy theory. So since red pill is about adopting certain beliefs (specifically the side bar), then “blue pill” can be anything that disagrees with it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 08:33 PM
10

A common thing in this sub is that “blue pill” is apparently defined as any and everything the OP claims to not like. That’s why nobody can ever seem to agree on what it is and the criticisms are never specific, like what’s going on in this post and in the comments. Like I don’t agree with anything you’ve said, and I also don’t see blue flaired people here making those arguments either. It makes sense though because red pill defines itself as The Truth and a secret cool kids club, so blue pill a…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 05:57 PM
3

Lmaoo
/r/PurplePillDebate29/04/26 12:25 AM
6

Huh? How do the relationship skills you listed somehow not apply to women?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 10:07 PM
4

I don’t agree that anyone needs to date a lot of people to learn those lessons and life/relationship skills. A lot of those things I learned either through the small number of men I’ve dated, through friendships and family relationships, or even through professional relationships. All as I’ve grown up into an adult who cares about relationships and introspection. Dating a lot of people doesn’t guarantee that you’re gonna introspect or care about how to navigate inevitable conflict. In fact, if y…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 10:02 PM
–

Are “bad boys” always prioritizing female validation though? And I also said that people usually can pick up on low self esteem, not “all women” do. The women who like guys with low self esteem tend to also have low self esteem themselves, ime. Like attracts like.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 09:17 PM
–

Disagree with which part exactly?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 08:40 PM
–

There’s nothing inherently bad about wanting to be attractive and find a partner, and it can be pretty motivating. But if it stays your primary motivation and you prioritize it over other more sustainable and empowering goals, you’ll probably burn yourself out and it’ll make your self esteem more fragile. People are also usually good at picking up on when someone’s self esteem hinges mostly on impressing the opposite sex. A lot of people find that to be unattractive because it makes you seem vap…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 06:49 PM
9

Well said. Touch is one of my top love languages too, but I definitely do not like when touch is treated as something that just leads to sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 06:00 PM
–

For real. Being hotter means more people out there will be open to dating you and giving you some grace, but that doesn’t mean everyone will equally tolerate your bs, especially once the first impression has worn off. And it’s also like people here forget that the Halo Effect as a cognitive bias goes in more directions, it’s not only about looks. Non-physical traits are also shown to influence how attractive and generally competent other people think you are.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 04:35 PM
2

Meanwhile as a woman you're either born with beauty or you're not, and you develop the performance of the feminine gender role which is not dependent on the "market", you can more reliably perform role regardless of whether you get hired, of whether you come from a rich background or not exactly because this labor is considered an externality by capitalism. Feminine beauty is largely seen as something very fleeting with age, something nobody has control over, if a woman even has beauty “naturall…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 04:06 PM
5

But obviously came from something real, which is that the value women have is more internal to themselves, at least in current society. That doesn't mean you're loved for who you are but that does mean you're under less social pressure to compete economically at least when it comes to finding a partner. In contrast, you're under more social pressure to take care of your looks. But providing economically is not the only way someone can be expected to provide tangible value. It’s not just about lo…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 01:26 PM
–

Well idk how many people really go into dating with like a lofty wish list though. Like I have some general traits in mind in what I envision for what I want, but not a hyper detailed laundry list, so the idea of “good enough but not perfectly what I wanted” is not something that ever crossed my mind. I really think this mindset comes down to your own personality, and isn’t a universal thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 03:03 AM
1

The thing is you didn't directly address what I said, you directly addressed the worst possible and most bad faith interpretation of what I said. And what was the good faith version of what you said?? 😭 Why can’t you be direct? Men ought to be tall and handsome and rich and charming and kind and caring and do everything women demand of them, including avoiding a list of icks a mile long, and if men fail to do any of these hundreds of requirements then men aren't good enough. All of those are not…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 02:49 AM
3

Sorry, but none of that is what OP said in her post. It sounds like you're busily grafting your own preconceived notions of what women think onto her, Uh, OP straight up replied to my comment before you did to tell me that she agrees with how I summarized her post. Lol just like you grafted your preconceived notions of what men think on to me, without actually reading, absorbing and engaging with what either of us are literally saying. Sorry, what exactly did I graft onto you? I don’t think I wr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 01:51 AM
1

I never said anything about women freely giving away their bodies, so let's calm down with the outlandish accusations and straw man attempts yeah? The OP is about women “overrating” themselves and consequently not finding a partner, and you compared those women to nobility demanding taxes from oppressed peasants. If you don’t like me directly addressing what you laid out, then maybe you should be clearer. All of your comments to other users in this thread are very vague. No but women demanding e…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 12:47 AM
2

But it doesn't go on to challenge or reject that state of affairs. It goes on to support it and argue that it is exactly how it should be - that heterosexual intimacy is a just exchange where women provide sex and affection, and men provide resources, both things of equal value. That’s not what I took away from the post at all. I see it as OP explaining the broader, most bare bones dynamic between men and women, and what defines the differences in their gendered expectations. Basically based on …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/04/26 12:05 AM
4

They are not taken as a given. Decades have actually been spent challenging those roles, If something still needs to be “challenged” then that means it’s still pervasive. OP literally opens the post with the red pill adage “women are valued for who they are” to illustrate that. Did you not read the post? OP doesn't say anything about feminism. You do. So your post indicates that feminism is about enforcing sex roles. What post of mine? Where did I say that feminism is about enforcing gender role…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 11:10 PM
6

You didn’t really explain anything here. What in OP’s post indicates that “feminism is about enforcing sex roles”? OP described how women have always had gendered expectations placed on us, and that they’re often taken as a given, rather than something that does demand effort and sacrifice from women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 10:56 PM
12

You wanna expand on that?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 10:32 PM
2

Yes we’re both very handsy people, whether it’s during sex or just being near each other or walking past each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 10:24 PM
19

Good post. The whole “Men value women for who they are, women value men for what they provide” thing has got to be one of the more ridiculous, self congratulatory, un-self aware ideas that ever came out of RP / the manosphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 09:50 PM
18

And the nobility isn't making any demands from the peasants either, the peasants are free to not pay the taxes if they don't feel like it. Nobility can demand taxes from peasants via the threat of structural violence, like jail time, eviction, etc.. Women not freely giving their bodies to any man who wants them is not a form of violence. Women being single if they can’t find a man they like is not a form of violence. Seems like you're taking the most deliberately bad faith take to try and discre…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/04/26 06:33 PM
–

What defines “good” depends on the woman and what she wants out of dating, that’s not my judgement call to make. I think women especially understand and are in agreement that dating is a voluntary activity and that it’s a long game, so there’s nothing really wrong with the standards another woman sets for herself for such a serious life decision. Men tend to not get that, and they think more short term than long term with dating. That’s why their advice to women is usually for her to either chan…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 09:27 PM
–

Yeah this is a very common take here that women have about men, especially manosphere men.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 08:53 PM
1

“Matching personalities” is pretty vague though, that could just mean having like 1-2 things in common. Anyway the bigger point is that women generally want to feel picked and like the guy is selective and not needy.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 08:49 PM
–

When women seek dating advice, it’s usually from other women with similar experience. Which makes sense, because it’s usually those women who can give the best advice around how to vet better. Vetting is the bottleneck of women’s dating problems. Often times men’s idea of “self improvement” advice for women is not actually the kind of advice that’s useful to women, because they don’t know much about vetting. That’s probably why women don’t tend to ask men for dating advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 08:20 PM
–

we have plenty of options, that’s not the issue for us. This is the operative phrase. Women generally don’t need to self improve to get indiscriminate male attention and matches, but it is probably needed to find the right guy more easily. Women struggle more with quality because quantity is usually not the concern.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 07:33 PM
1

Niche as in you are picky about the type of person you want to date. Not wanting a woman just because she’s somewhat pretty and nice. I think it is a problem because desperation and lack of self respect are some of the most universal turn offs to women.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 06:07 PM
2

You have to know the niche you even want if you’re going to figure out how to find them and attract them. The problem seems to be that men here want to be impossibly attractive to all or most women, in any setting, instead of focusing on a niche. In this very thread guys are saying they’ll take “any” woman, but it’s like they don’t realize how much that attitude can project desperation and a lack of respect for yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 05:36 PM
0

It entirely depends on what someone’s struggling with. In my own life I come across way more women with people pleasing tendencies than I do men like that, so a lot of times I think women do need to be told to practice having better boundaries. Though if a guy is being a pushover in his relationship for example, I do see people tell him to build better boundaries too.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 05:28 PM
3

Yeah dude, that fake quote is what I said. I don’t feel like playing petty games with you, so peace out and good luck.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:55 PM
6

Yes you are amazingly bad faith. Surely you’re a reliable narrator as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:46 PM
0

Some person telling you to kys is not ok, but I highly doubt that the conversation leading up to that was non hostile. There are so many threads where women (and men) post stand alone comments with different kinds of genuine advice.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:42 PM
3

There have been so many discussions on this, especially in Q4W threads where the OP isn’t being very hostile, and you’ve been here a long time so I’m sure you’ve seen them. Getting into arguments with random angry users here who tell you to kys is clearly not a place to get genuine advice. The conversation needs to actually be good faith.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:34 PM
9

Trying to convince women to cater to you out of pity is not the only type of solution. Women here often do try to give men solutions to do better in dating, but a lot of struggling guys here are like “well some guy way hotter than me out there has it easier, so do not tell me to put effort or self improooov because it’s not fair!!” Also a lot of guys here even admit in the daily threads that they’re just here to vent and try to make women upset. They’re not in a level-headed, rational headspace …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:21 PM
–

This is a common trope but I’m just not sure I really buy it. When guys here say men are more flexible because they like stuff like different heights or levels of chubbiness, it feels like there’s missing context. For one, height is one trait that’s more important to women than it is to men. A reverse example would be levels of grooming; it’s much for important for women to be meticulously groomed and pristine looking to be attractive to the opposite sex, than it is for men. Men can be hairy, ru…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/04/26 04:02 PM
2

Yes there is so much value in having someone informed and trusted who can guide you, see you, validate your feelings, and hold you accountable. I strongly believe that people truly heal through relationship, not by being alone with just their own minds.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 09:06 PM
72

Alot of men need goals, they need told what to do and get to work. Thats our therapy. This is how a lot of CBT works though. Having a professional with an educated, outside perspective who can guide you out of maladaptive cognitive and behavioral habits that you keep you stuck in certain patterns. Being depressed or otherwise mentally unwell literally makes you less capable of rational thought. No, talk therapy isn’t a silver bullet and you’re not guaranteed to easily find the right therapist fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 08:30 PM
1

Maybe to some extent, but it hasn’t always been the case that men are socially and emotionally isolated from other men.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 07:56 PM
1

It just seems it’s more-so individual to the person, and depends on other context about them. Hard to make a judgement call only on the preference and not much else about the person saying it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 06:10 PM
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Kinda, but it’s not as simple as more dimorphic = more attractive. Otherwise it’d be conventionally ideal for men to be bald and for women to be fat, for example. Her other points are still valid.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 06:05 PM
3

Exactly. There seems to be a lot of men, especially as I’ve seen on this sub, say that putting effort into being social is useless if they can’t guarantee with certainty that they’ll get laid as like a direct result. I’ve never seen a woman question doing certain social hobbies or going out with friends if they don’t know if they’ll meet attractive men there. Also, women seem much more fond of emotional intimacy and relationship rituals with female friends and family, vs how men socialize with e…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 05:11 PM
1

I think preferences like that could either be insecurity / wanting less competition, or also just being more comfortable with yourself. Because imo conformist preferences can also be about wanting a partner to fit more of status symbol, to make other people respect you or feel jealous. So I think it really could go either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 04:56 PM
3

Pov: the local economy sucks
/r/PurplePillDebate22/04/26 04:50 PM
–

It’s always weird to me when some guys here are like “why do people argue against the men here more than they argue with the women? Must be simping and WAW!” But it’s like, RP is a much more rigid belief system than being non-RP, and most people here very protective of RP beliefs are men. They’re already in the more defensive position, so it makes sense that they’re making more aggressive and rigid stances. There’s more you can poke holes in. It’d be like going to a religion debate sub and being…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 11:04 PM
27

Single fathers are usually richer and have more access to resources than single mothers do. Two-parent households have the most resources, and their children tend to have the best outcomes, with outcomes getting better the wealthier the household is.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 09:26 PM
4

For real, and it seems to not be very common knowledge yet. I’m getting to be near my 30s now and I have no kids yet (I think I want them), but if I were ever somehow single again I’d be really hesitant to date any guy much older than me, mostly because of those health risks. Also because an older spouse means they probably won’t be around as long.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 09:03 PM
–

No? But if my man were more emotionally intimate with a female friend than he was comfortable with ever being with me, that would feel really bad. Like why would he trust her more than his life partner?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 08:16 PM
–

Probably being emotionally vulnerable and sharing my inner world with someone, and having them genuinely listen. But sex is high up there too.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 08:08 PM
–

Not everyone feels the same way about sex, and people with a certain type of sociosexuality tend to pair off with people who have similar values anyway. So it goes both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 08:02 PM
–

That only makes sense if you think relationships are a hurdle to get sex, so you value casual more. That doesn’t mean the woman feels the same way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:46 PM
1

So you’re saying you’ll be ok as long as your future wife has casual sex with you first?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:34 PM
–

But is your self esteem going to be ok with a relationship that doesn’t function exactly like a hook up? Or will you take it out on her somehow?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:28 PM
–

Get a woman to birth kids for you just for you to expect you’ll resent her and harm the relationship? It doesn’t sound like you give af about the kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:18 PM
–

A lot of men get high from the thrill of the chase, and plenty of men also cheat on their wives/gfs or beat off to porn more than they want their familiar partners. It literally does go both ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:14 PM
–

Right so this directly contradicts your previous comment 😭 how are you gonna feel ok with yourself when a relationship eventually has boring or difficult moments, lol
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:11 PM
–

You’ve argued in here with me before that “desire always fades eventually” so it’s best to keep hopping into new casual relationships whenever the high wears off.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:07 PM
–

Here we go again. If women giving you casual is a superior experience for you than having LTRs, then just don’t ever form LTRs. But oh wait, even promiscuous men get tired of casual eventually and want to settle down in a meaningful LTR. It’s almost as if one is more emotionally fulfilling than the other.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 07:00 PM
9

They may not exactly have a deadline, but they do have reduced chances of being able to have kids the longer they wait. Sperm age affects ability to conceive and have healthy pregnancies. I think men generally don’t care as much about it though because fertility is mostly seen as the woman’s problem, and they don’t have to deal with miscarriages or health complications, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 06:31 PM
3

Straight up this is how it worked for my (formerly) promiscuous friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/04/26 05:30 PM
-2

Exactly. The audience answering matters a whole lot.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 11:14 PM
1

His looks aren’t the problem. Though if he fixed his posture and put on some muscle he’d probably be above average looking.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 10:34 PM
2

You can search up the same kind of posts but gender reversed, and reddit men give the same type of sugar coated answers to women insecure about their bodies too.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 10:29 PM
1

That’s female hypergamy for you
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 10:25 PM
5

Are most men “successful” then? And how do you define successful?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 07:00 PM
3

I’m not trying to say that men have zero standards at all for casual or ONS, but the gap in pickiness between casual vs long term is larger for men than how it is for women. Or put in red pill terms, I think men have a more dramatic dual mating strategy. I would say that women somewhat are pickier than men for sex partners and men are somewhat pickier than women for LTR/marriage partners, with enough outliers in both areas to muddy the waters, I’ve never really seen good evidence for this to be …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 06:50 PM
3

I guess it depends on how you define compromise. Men do put more overall value in looks though so it makes sense that men would be more dissatisfied if their partner is lacking there.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 06:37 PM
3

They're mad women are picky when it comes to sex and that women who have casual sex are able to get hotter men. Yes that too. Meanwhile, men are far more likely to have to compromise on looks. I don’t think this is exactly true. I think men are more likely to be dissatisfied when they compromise on looks though. Which is why I think the happiest relationships seem to be ones where the woman is slightly hotter, and the man is slightly more generous. Then they both feel like they’ve “won”, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 06:29 PM
8

Sure I agree, but I think this specific thing is something men are more ignorant to because pickiness is seen as a feminine trait. Women are picky for sex and dating, while men are really only picky for dating. But if men aren’t dtf for every woman who’ll easily sleep with them quickly, which are the women they usually see as “beneath” themselves, then fundamentally those men are being picky. They just don’t want to call it that, because to them “picky” is for women and therefore bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 06:10 PM
14

But red pillers in here say all the time that most men ARE simps, and that that’s why dating is the way that it is. Are simps a minority now? Also the logic in this post feels like a just world fallacy. If anything “most” men do is perfectly justified, then you’d need to apply the same logic to women. And I don’t think y’all would like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 05:59 PM
31

A lot of guys here can’t seem to admit that they’re plenty picky though because that’s exactly what they hate on women for. It might take them out of their victim complex.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 05:47 PM
6

For me it depends on if he’s already showing signs of being the type of guy I like. Which imo really can’t be faked. The more he fits into being my type, the more interest I’ll feel in getting to know him, and the more I’ll overlook stuff about him I don’t care for. But if he’s not my type then he’ll be a “no” to me, regardless of anything else going for him like him being a “good” guy, or him being conventionally attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/04/26 04:37 PM
8

Being female is not an ideology. Meanwhile TRP actually does talk about how marriage is a worse deal for men than it is for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 06:57 PM
0

Something spread as an opinion for “almost all of human history” (according to whose authority??) is not proof of anything OP said. Plenty of old beliefs from the past have been proven to be wrong. You’re the one who brought up “rates.” Asking for your evidence isn’t “gaslighting” you, red pillers here seem to love throwing that word around for the most innocuous things. And btw yes there is plenty of research on brain scans between men and women already and the sex differences in brains, but no…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 01:05 AM
2

It’s a people pleaser thing tbh
/r/PurplePillDebate09/04/26 12:08 AM
6

Thats what dating apps are for. Even before dating apps, people were going to places specifically to meet people to date. Dating apps are more hated because they create more problems because of the lack of social context. For men it makes it harder for them to get noticed, and for women it makes it harder to vet. And apparently dating apps have a disproportionate user base of people who are already not single. Also, on the flipside someone could be focusing more on their college years and sortin…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 11:57 PM
8

I would think dating as you get older is harder mainly because people have more adult obligations and non-social routines, so it’s harder to actually find single people. The dating pool is also smaller as more people pair off, so maybe a larger portion of the people still single might be single for more undesirable reasons? Like the people who are still very unhealed, as you say. The “good” ones are a hot commodity and aren’t likely to stay single for very long.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 11:29 PM
2

So you are being pedantic, got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 11:03 PM
1

I followed up your point and you don’t seem to have an answer for it. It’s normal to make inferences on a correlation if there aren’t missing variables.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 10:47 PM
2

I didn’t avoid your point, I asked you what other variables would point to a more likely conclusion? Maybe gender flipping the question will help. Do you think women likely also gain weight after marriage, or do you think men choose to marry fatter women over slimmer ones? Or is there something else?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 10:32 PM
3

This isn’t a circlejerk sub for men, despite the demographics here. Him and OP can’t just post opinions about women from their butt and call it “valid observation” without getting pushback lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 10:28 PM
3

What’s the problem with the study coming from Poland? Also you can't claim that men actually get fatter than women do after getting married as this is not what was studied. Married people were compared and measured against not married people. Well no they didn’t follow these couples around for years from pre engagement until years after getting married, but comparing married people to their single counterparts doesn’t leave you many questions to ask: Do you think women choose to marry fatter men…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 10:03 PM
4

What exactly are these “rates” you speak of? Is it based on anything measurable or is it just a conclusion you’ve jumped to?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 09:35 PM
13

Men actually get fatter than women do after getting married. Apparently it’s a 62% higher risk of becoming overweight for men, vs a 39% risk for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 07:22 PM
6

The more that having kids is a liability and likely to downgrade your living conditions, the less likely people are gonna want to have kids. Nobody wants to downgrade their lives, I think that’s just basic behavioral economics.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:55 PM
–

I see it like this: Men have more burden in the front end of dating (courting phase) while women have more burden in the back end. Why? Because men generally have more to gain and less to lose, in dealing with the opposite sex, than women do. Blame reproductive biology, whatever. But that’s why the supply and demand works the way it does, and that’s why there will always be more male pursuers than female ones. When conditions in society get worse, and society is just downstream of economic / mat…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:48 PM
3

You can tell which side actually has it worse by whichever side doesn't feel the need to argue both sides have different problems and it's impossible to compare. “My gender has it worse because we’re more likely to complain in here” is really the argument you’re trying to make?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/04/26 04:18 PM
1

Gold digger and trophy wife are insulting terms to the woman, and there’s the implication that the woman is fully aware of the situation and likes it that way. Very different from how it is for the mail order bride stereotypes, where the woman in a poorer country has less say over the direction of her own life. Being poor in a wealthy country is different than being in a poor country.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 05:00 PM
1

If it’s bullshit then why can’t you give other examples of cultural tropes that fit that dynamic lol? The foreign dating trope is the mail order bride / green card seeker, which inherently puts the poorer (usually woman) at a bigger disadvantage.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:38 PM
1

If you’re living in a first world country then that kind of dynamic is assumed to either be sugar dating, or that the woman is explicitly a tradwife.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:32 PM
2

I mean yeah. A lot of ND women are especially into looksmaxxing and glowing up for similar reasons. It’s true for me anyway, looking good makes me feel better about being ND lol. It’s more complicated for women though because beauty also has negative consequences for us in a way that it doesn’t for men. But on a larger societal scale, the trend is a sign that we’re all becoming more poorly socialized imo.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:30 PM
1

If you talk about staying in the same country to purposefully date someone poorer, what people probably imagine is actual sugar dating. As in it’s a more blatant exchange, with the woman exerting autonomy on a similar level as the man. The sugar baby is more guaranteed to actually benefit and not necessarily get screwed over, just like how it is for the richer man.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:22 PM
0

Actually though, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/04/26 04:00 PM
0

To date? Usually those men say on here that going for women “beneath” them in the hierarchy is something they only do to break a dry spell. They just want a hole at that point. It’s their own version of a blatant dual mating strategy. They look down on those women because they want them for a pump and dump, and that’s largely why they’re so offended whenever those women aren’t interested. Like, how dare those women not be grateful for the chance of a man superior to them offering to fuck them, t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:31 AM
2

That study showed that the women on that app rating 80% of the men as below average looking still messaged those men at a nearly identical curve. Something like that could imply that the women rating those men also see themselves as having a similar mate value. And the women that men chose to send messages to was not proportional to the attractiveness ratings men gave; the men disproportionately messaged the hottest women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 10:24 AM
–

imo internalized misogyny seems to play an even bigger role Oh for sure and I agree! It seems to be for the same reasons that patriarchal religions tend to have so much disdain for gay men in particular. It’s just a lot to unpack so I’m simplifying it here by just referring to homophobia.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 01:26 AM
-2

I literally just explained how those two opinions are implied in that type of statement? People don’t usually state their contradicting opinions together in super explicit terms, because then they’d probably notice how silly it sounds.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 01:15 AM
–

Stating one correlation between diverse social environments and fear based social attitudes like homophobia, is not getting on a soapbox when it was literally relevant to the conversation. I also live in a diverse area like a lot of people on reddit, so pointing out something relevant about living where I live is not “extremism” lmao. I also already answered your main point, so if you can’t put your strong feelings aside then I have nothing else to say. Peace and love ✌️
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 01:09 AM
–

Buddy I said nothing “extremist” other than point out a trend that’s been verified by social research for a long time. You got very aggressive suddenly for no reason, so maybe that’s your own fear bias coming out.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 12:46 AM
-4

Calling women beneath you in how you rank them in SMV shows that those men do have their own various standards for women. But they think getting rejected by the women they call less desirable is immoral and “hypergamous.” The actual problem is they think women are supposed to agree with their theory of dating value, like it’s a fact and not an opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 12:42 AM
–

One of the more controversial topics on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 12:35 AM
–

A lot of garden variety progressive women see gay/bi men as a sassy “gay best friend” like they’re fun accessories or like more friends to vent to about men, but they don’t actually care about the LGBT experience with any kind of depth. Also if calling yourself “progressive” is the status quo position where you live, the term becomes way more watered down. I also see no issue with my framing when people who live in areas that are more demographically homogenous actually are more fear driven in t…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 12:33 AM
-5

“Even undesirable women below a man’s SMV level reject him, how spoiled and hypergamous of them!” is a common argument on here.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/04/26 12:15 AM
–

People who are homophobic usually have no motivation to examine themselves, unless they get close to some LGBTQ friends / family that they can finally empathize with. That’s pretty much how people become less bigoted about anything, in general. Having more diverse people in your life and not living in a bubble. It’s also why asking either men or women collectively to “please consider dating X type of person that you don’t even want to socialize with!” is a pointless conversation. Trying to debat…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:34 PM
1

You could try it out and see how it makes you feel. And keep in mind that you might not hurt someone, but you could get hurt too. Being poly isn’t for everyone but maybe it’ll feel more authentic for you, if it calls to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:55 PM
2

It just feels like a reach. Like I’ve seen women talk about how they appreciate seeing female rage or morally grey female villains get showcased now in media, that are complicated and multifaceted humans just like men were typically always written. Because in old media written by men, women were not shown as multifaceted at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:50 PM
1

Maybe explore why the label makes you hesitate. Maybe you do want to multidate or even be poly? Or does the label make you feel like you can’t back out and cleanly break up if you turn out to not like them later on? Lots of questions you could ask yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:33 PM
1

Commitment in what sense? Just a label? Being exclusive? Is the problem that you want to keep talking to other people while you get to know the person? It’s good to know how you feel and what your boundaries are so you can communicate them. For me it’s always been easy to be exclusive immediately because I don’t care for entertaining multiple people. But I’ve been slow to open up, get emotional, get sexual, or enmesh our friends and families. I think it’s mostly down to your personality. I prefe…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 09:23 PM
0

Did you also post about being upset that the male assailants were being violent to women? Are you trying to advocate for anti violence in fantasy TV shows, or are you only upset at the women? Lol
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 05:08 PM
1

That’s not very exciting or satisfying though. This is fiction, not real life.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 04:53 PM
5

However, my point is about the asymmetric dating landscape not individual character. It’s only asymmetric if you’re only looking at dating really narrowly. The supply and demand between men and women has always inherently been the way that it is because men feel hornier than women in general. And the reason why men feel hornier is because they don’t have the (reproductive or otherwise) risks that women face after the courting phase. So in this really basic way, the sexes are “even.” Even if we r…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 01:38 PM
22

Yes I avoid getting too close to those people. If it’s a family member or some mutual friend that I can’t avoid, I just avoid those conversations and focus on more cordial ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 11:08 AM
9

My thesis isn't a 'sad and lonely' plea for empathy - it is a clinical acknowledgment of institutional apathy toward a demographic that has been factored out of the social contract by design. Dismissing this as an 'Apex Fallacy' or a moral failing of 'loners' is exactly the name-calling I mentioned; What social contract are you even talking about? What evidence is there of a “surplus of men”? You need to be specific. You said in your own post that men are expected to bring value, but women aren’…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 10:57 AM
2

Women like watching their assailants face some karma? Who would’ve thought!
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:59 AM
20

Why do you compare all men to only fertile age women? You’re kind of giving it away there. Clearly certain types of women are more valued than others, just like how it is for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:51 AM
16

Succinct and well said. So how people regularly treat ugly/fat/old women? Not saying that men aren't turned down if they don't meet certain standards, but the same is true for women. And this part is why it’s so annoying when manosphere guys say “women have inherent value.” They clearly suffer from their own version of apex fallacy where they don’t notice the ~inherent~ expectation for a woman to be hot, young, domestic, motherly, and submissive for men. The irony. Don’t beg for empathy if you’r…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/04/26 03:26 AM
2

You don’t see relationships where they take turns being the adorer?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 11:09 PM
1

Funny that just the other day a guy here posted that men are all leveling up and women are mostly all sad losers living stagnant lives with “nothing to offer.” I think it goes to show that your environment and the people (or let’s be real, online content) you’re exposed to have a huge influence on how you perceive reality. Nobody’s anecdotes are “objective” even if they find other people to agree with them. So maybe people need to argue more with evidence instead of “observations”, stop projecti…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 10:15 PM
–

Btw I’m not agreeing with you, because there’s no evidence that “men settle more” anyway, but I’m just pointing out that your opinions go against TRP.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 09:25 PM
5

Saying “sperm is cheap so we don’t need as many men to create families” is not asking for any extra reward from men though? Even if it’s a really crass thing to say. The point of “taking credit” is to receive a reward. Like when manosphere guys usually say “men built society” (i.e men dominated public life), the argument is that women need to be more grateful to men as a collective in dating, as a reward. As if men’s domination in non-domestic work was for women / with women’s agreement, or as i…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 09:22 PM
5

But in what way do non-mothers “take credit” for mothers? Like what is the real life argument?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:53 PM
5

Sure, but tbf most women are mothers, or are planning their lives around becoming mothers. Most people are also grateful to their mothers as their primary caregivers, even in adulthood.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:45 PM
2

Yeah
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:30 PM
1

How does a woman being sexy negatively impact your relationship? Realistically speaking, the guy is trading resources / experiences for access to her body. So that in a way makes them “even.” But outside of that, the partner with way more adult life experience and/or money can more easily manipulate the direction of the relationship. So it’s overall a net negative to the younger partner, especially long term.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:16 PM
–

This is another wild take coming from a redpiller lol, given how much “women initiating divorces” is so demonized. And yeah married men do cheat more than women do, after all. So maybe a lot of the fear pushed in the manosphere is mostly men projecting.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 08:03 PM
–

Women who are more open to casual are more likely to think the same attitude is attractive in men. Why do y’all still not get this. It’s the same reason why many male sluts (and undersocialized men who get most of their exposure to women through social media) only seem to know of women who also have high n counts, or women who do crazy shit when they’re bored on weekends like gangbangs or anal in club bathrooms or whatever tf y’all say lol. It’s pure comedy.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 07:59 PM
–

But you’re saying that women are satisfied with the man they get because they held to their demands, right? So then why does red pill say women end marriages more due to having settled in picking a partner? Makes no sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 07:29 PM
1

He is not trying to impress me by lying; he is trying to impress women, Bro this is the same difference 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:15 PM
–

Your friend trying to impress you is not indicative that people in general exaggerate enough on anonymous surveys, to flip the gender gap in n count. Maybe criticize the methods in the surveys if you doubt the results.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:12 PM
–

Yes, you find out people’s n counts by asking them? And an anonymous survey is more credible than some random guy’s biased opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:04 PM
6

I’ve heard enough young guys in college talk openly about wanting to bang MILFs to believe this, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 06:00 PM
–

So the data is wrong and your imagination is correct?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:58 PM
–

Based on what? The median number of past sexual partners for men is higher than women’s.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:56 PM
10

A 30 y/o woman may as well be a MILF to a 20 y/o college kid…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:52 PM
9

I doubt men are any less willing to date an older MILF, if they could. Just like how the women willing to date older, only tend to want some older men.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:45 PM
–

Never thought I’d see a red piller say that. Usually I see them blaming relationship dissatisfaction on women.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:28 PM
1

Because a lot of people are still motivated enough to keep trying and hopefully eventually find the right person. Life is long and full of potential and surprises, so why give up early? A saying that personally got me through the hard times in dating: Every guy is the wrong one, until you eventually meet the right one. I wanted to give up after facing cheating and an assault, and that mindset helped keep my heart open to the right guy eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 05:00 PM
–

So then that means women are more satisfied with the partners they pick 🤔
/r/PurplePillDebate31/03/26 04:06 PM
1

I feel like this is true in the sense that if you do all the “right” things and you’re a generally pleasant person to be around, then you can eventually find someone who’ll love you. Even if you’re chopped, lol. There are plenty of chopped couples out there.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 09:07 PM
1

I’m not comparing beautiful women to ugly women, I’m comparing beautiful women to masculine men. Women are punished in the power hierarchy both for being ugly/masculine and for being beautiful/feminine, in other words it’s rigged. Masculinity doesn’t create this double bind for power. Men are taught to either sink or swim. And you mistakenly believe toxic masculinity always serves to benefit men. When toxic masculinity puts men into wars to die for meaningless objectives, I suppose that's a priv…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 08:52 PM
2

99% of people using the phrase will not be able to say what you just said. Maybe some people have trouble articulating it, but the more casual version of saying it is that toxic masculinity helps men succeed in patriarchy while women don’t succeed by conforming to femininity. Being beautiful and conforming to femininity actually harm women’s chances when they pursue managerial positions, or also positions in male dominated fields (both of which are the kinds of jobs that tend to pay more money).…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 08:06 PM
2

Toxic masculinity is a broader cultural term that relates back to hegemonic masculinity. As in, culturally masculine traits are more rewarded with power/money. There is a ton of research on this. It has more structural consequences than only harming the man or his close relationships. Women internalizing misogyny towards themselves is not something that inherently brings them more socioeconomic leverage, it’s mainly something that only results in self harm or harms their close relationships. It …
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:26 PM
2

Exactly. Also like if the term internalized misandry is a more comfortable step for a man to start using it to be introspective, and it helps him make more healthy empowering choices, then he should explore that for himself. It’s better than nothing. But that doesn’t mean toxic masculinity isn’t a term that stands on its own in broader cultural analysis though.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 04:02 PM
1

You can form committed relationships without presenting yourself as needy.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:51 PM
2

That’s kind of you to say, thank you. It’s always refreshing to hear a balanced take about motherhood and not just get told to have kids because “you’ll just magically figure it out and be okay!” because that feels really invalidating coming from someone who doesn’t know your circumstances very well. I hope you find more support both emotionally and logistically. Life is hard but I feel like many other people feel the same way and do want to build community, they just might not know how to do it…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:51 PM
2

It’s more like coming off as needy and dependent is what turns women off.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 03:44 PM
1

The reason for that early dating advantage is men’s libidos. Their testosterone. The biological trade off is that men want sex more badly because sex/pregnancy is a larger risk to women, so women are more cautious and less horny. So it’s already “even”.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:56 PM
1

There’s AI porn and sexbots now, no sex worker really even needed. But most men seem to still prefer the social experience and validation of actually wooing a real life human woman, so it won’t actually change the dynamic. The men who use that technology the most probably would’ve still been celibate without it anyway. It’s just enhanced masturbation.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 01:43 PM
3

These exact thoughts are the main reason why I’m on the fence about having kids. My partner wants them but the thought of making a decision gives me anxiety.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 12:12 PM
1

Why are you not comparing them to non-sexist men who also have relationships, which is a closer comparison? Because apparently sexist men are also more likely to get divorced.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 12:03 PM
1

And women don’t put far more work than men into looking beautiful and being likeable? The pretty women with good manners are the most successful ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 11:07 AM
0

Show me a woman with a guy who's less confident/assertive, less socially skilled, less wealthy, less successful, less in shape, not an above-average male in any category, etc. You’re choosing to focus only on traits that are more socially valued in men. How come men aren’t called “hypergamous” when they date women who are more diplomatic and graceful, agreeable, socially conscientious and attentive, have smoother and clearer skin, better hair, better fashion sense, and are more meticulously groo…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 10:53 AM
5

That may not be everyone’s cup of tea but it seems lighthearted and they have a sense of humor. I say who cares.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/03/26 12:36 AM
6

A lot of guys are offended at women existing while not giving them a boner. It gets the amygdala going.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 10:27 PM
2

The culture is out of wack right now. It will readjust once men step their game up and women and men get slightly less delusional. Women aren’t being delusional if they’re getting the results they shoot for. That’s the root of the conversation. Men, but really people in general, will allow whatever they’re content enough with. If they weren’t content, then they’d put more effort to do better for themselves. That’s how motivation works. Men seem to be more (sexually) contented because they have m…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 10:24 PM
7

Women are overcorrecting currently because of all the new found freedoms they are living with. Ok so in what way are women “overcorrecting” the dating market and forcing men to date outside their league? You gave no explanation. Because they don't fully desire them. Men would pair off with anyone if someone was not to their liking even if the opposite was dying alone. When women do this, they’re called “hypergamous” and not appreciative of their dating market “match”. Why does that not apply to …
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 10:04 PM
3

“Nooo, those are the broken women. You don't want to date them.” Yes, I don’t know any well adjusted women doing well for themselves financially who are hobosexual. You guys seem to obsess over low-class men because you wish you could put less effort in your lives and still get women. Any women apparently. If you say that 1 in 4 new marriages come from online dating (OLD), people say something like: “That doesn’t count. OLD is just the most popular way to meet a future spouse. It only matters if…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:51 PM
7

If you can only afford water and bread because the main supplier of food has halted all food imports into your country is the market "correct?" Is it accurate? You need to give a real example of men being forcefully “halted” from dating in their “real” league. An actual example of this was women having less financial autonomy, so the main way women could survive was by dating men for their money. So then maybe the old market was actually the incorrect one? Men are lopsiding the market by desirin…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:14 PM
2

Guys current leagues ARE dating down. If that is your “league” then it’s not dating “down.” What do you think down means? Then your last paragraph sounds like you’re saying the opposite. And what’s the measurement for a market being “lopsided” or “inflated”? It just sounds like an alternative way of saying “I’m not interested in my options, and it’s other people’s fault.”
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 09:05 PM
10

So unless a man can easily attract a bunch of women of a certain caliber, then that’s not his league either. By this logic. The guys who say “you can be successful if you just date down” are not truly dating “down” then.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 08:49 PM
6

Yup. And of course it’s unfalsifiable. That’s why they’re always shifting the definition to rationalize anything a woman chooses. It always ends up being a circular argument.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 08:24 PM
5

I don’t think the guys who believe women are “hypergamous” are even aware that they’re also admitting that they think men are superior to the women they end up with. Nothing strange about that 🤔
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 06:20 PM
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Right that’s how “leagues” are established. People date among other people with a similar social value. If someone way hotter than me were trying to date me, I’d assume he chose me for non-looks reasons specifically. Some people date down because they believe if you can’t do any better than them, then they can dominate the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 04:37 PM
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So true. This is why women should only accept absolute Chads.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 04:15 PM
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Or maybe it’s a generational thing. My boomer mom and her friends seem to all prefer clean shaven men. That look used to be more popular in their day.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 10:58 AM
2

Why would he use an example of men doing the same thing he’s saying women do, unless he didn’t notice the hypocrisy? He could’ve said something that’s neutral and factual, like men dying more by suicide, another example he actually used. So odds are OP does agree that “men built society.” He even replied to me in the same way you did, and when someone made the same observation, he never responded to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/03/26 02:20 AM
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Does the woman’s age really matter? I’m under 30, and I’m indifferent to tall men plus I’m partial to men with nice hair. A lot of guys can have a nice build in different sizes imo as long as there’s muscle and he looks proportional.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 11:52 PM
1

Women being less frequent users of dating apps (and therefore having more matches due to demand) is a pretty flimsy way to make your conclusion. Why are men more shy of commitment then, if you assume they appreciate and value women so much? You never answered that. Some more relevant data on your op topic would be that men over age 35 actually cheat at higher rates than their female counterparts do (20% vs 13% respectively), while under age 35 (typically before people are legally tied in marriag…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 11:33 PM
5

The United States spends approximately 5.4% to 5.8% of its GDP on total education (public and private, from primary to tertiary levels), which is above the OECD average of 4.7%–5.0%. You need to get specific with what that money is being spent on in the education sector. Because in the US, our schools put more funding towards varsity team sports than the schools in the EU do, for example, and less towards things like teacher training, instruction materials, and food (America has the highest chil…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 08:56 PM
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Wrong, there’s plenty of men that are into small breasts. With the caveats that I gave you. Like I already said, women with big boobs don’t need to be as skinny/fit, pretty, or proportional to get the same amount of attention. It’s the same for men’s height. Small breasted women don’t struggle with men, stop pretending. Ok, except I never said that. Women mostly won’t struggle to find options unless they’re very masculine looking all over. Like I already said in this thread, women like that are …
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 08:33 PM
0

Is that what I said?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 08:23 PM
1

Cherry picked means that the data is incomplete to make the separate conclusion that you want to be true. You can’t just extrapolate from it whatever you want, I think you wouldn’t like it if I did the same thing to make conclusions about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 08:00 PM
9

In countries where education is well funded and teachers are well compensated, people have much better literacy rates and they work in more specialized labor fields.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 06:25 PM
7

I know. The comparison is to show that labor gets more credit if it’s dominated by men. There seems to be a bias that things are more frivolous if it’s associated with women. Masculine vs feminine hobbies are another example of that. Or people’s attitudes towards gay/bi men vs gay/bi women are another (i.e bi women are just “attention seeking” and lesbians are just “going through a man-hating phase”).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 06:20 PM
5

How does this relate to my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 04:24 PM
0

Or they’re saying in on a podcast or YouTube channel paid for by sponsorships 😭
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 04:20 PM
11

Yeah the “men built society” guys act like women aren’t also in the background doing most of the nurturing, caregiving, teaching, nursing, etc. that keeps society functioning. Especially for children and the sick or elderly. They treat feminine labor as invisible, taken as a given, and for those reasons it’s often paid less. Value = compensation. Working class people built society. But that credit has largely been only given to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 04:13 PM
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No, I think people are just more cynical in areas they struggle more with. Like how men who are successful in capitalism believe that “meritocracy and hard work” is the reason why people have the wealth they have, or don’t have.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 03:44 PM
40

Tell a feminist that men work all the dangerous jobs and built society. My guy this is literally you doing the same exact thing you’re complaining about? “Men built society” is seeing men as a collective for the things that you like, and “not all men” as you’re doing here is used for the things you don’t like. Just more pointlessly gendered slop.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:17 PM
–

No, it’s against the contentless rhetoric rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:13 PM
–

Women talk like this outside of pill spaces, they consume more romantic media from a young age, women are more into sappy stuff like hallmark movies and romcoms and anniversary rituals, etc.. If you have no counter argument then you might as well have just said “women bad.”
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:07 PM
6

You are asking women how they’d react, but I just told you there are already stats on this lol. Men are more likely to move on to new partners and they do so faster after the death of a spouse.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 02:02 PM
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Why is it then that blue flaired people (mostly women) talk more like the first one while red flaired (mostly men) talk more like the second one? Manosphere views of love are much more cold, not romantic.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:59 PM
7

It basically answers your OP, especially combined with your opinion it would logically lead to you admitting that you think women love their passed husbands more than the other way around.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:51 PM
8

You do know that widowed men are more likely to remarry than widowed women, right? And they even remarry faster, too.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 01:43 PM
–

Men being attracted to more women in general doesn’t mean that there aren’t trends in men’s preferences, or that there aren’t traits that make women significantly more appealing to men. Like I’ve seen men all the time say that small boobs “are fine” so long as there’s other things going for her, like she’s skinny/fit, has a very pretty face, or a fat ass lol. A woman with big boobs can be considered really hot to men without having those other things. It literally works the same for men’s height…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:38 PM
3

I’m talking about stuff I’ve observed in women’s committed LTRs and marriages, not just women in the talking phase. But even then, we can just turn your silly argument around because it’s conveniently unfalsifiable lol. A man faces cheating or monkey branching? Well that must mean she was out of his league! Must be his fault then.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 11:03 AM
3

And here’s the key point: When one side has more options, they become more selective and less invested. That’s basic market behavior, not gender bias. This is an assumption made from your cherry picked dating app stats, there’s no “proof” or data that shows women are less emotionally invested in their real life partners. Having a competitive mindset to attract a new partner also doesn’t mean that you have a loyal, contented mindset. For example why then would there be a trope that men are more a…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 10:49 AM
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It’s a bias that comes from male hegemony. If a man with power does something bad, he’s individually a bad human. If a woman with power does something bad, well that’s representative of all women and we should probably make sure women have less access to power.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:38 AM
2

I feel it just depends on your life goals and how much you’re willing to invest in where you live, or if you prefer a more nomadic lifestyle. I don’t think one has to be better than the other, but I’m personally more into ownership.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/03/26 12:25 AM
2

These are pretty solipsistic arguments, it’s all just your opinions being applied to everyone else. You sound like you just probably are more suited to a poly lifestyle. Plenty of men don’t see the appeal in sharing partners because they have a different sexual worldview. Also, if women were somehow “biologically” not the same way, then women would have no interest in getting off to porn or smut for example. It’s normal to feel attraction to multiple people, but not everyone believes it should b…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 11:51 PM
2

My point is a male cheater is not somehow seen more favorably in general than a female cheater. Simply saying “but it’s in my biology to cheat” doesn’t mean others will agree with you and sympathize with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 11:22 PM
3

This is just a very male POV. Plenty of women will justify a woman cheating by saying she was mistreated or neglected, and see the man as worse if he does it. People find ways to justify their behavior or “their team” all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:56 PM
2

Here, I’ll spell it out some more. The baddie can be seen as the upgrade because she gets more of his effort and seduction, just like the loving beta can be seen as the variety because she gets both the sweet and the spicy experience. You’ve made no real point to show otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:47 PM
1

short men are heavily denigrated in a way that women with small chests are not. This seems to shift with culture, because if we were back in 2000s and earlier then the opposite would be true. Men and pop culture voices (which were always male centric) used to be way louder about their opinions on women’s bodies while women were quieter about their opinions on men’s, and I think now the pendulum has swung more which seems to be like revenge for what women always had to deal with historically. Not…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:37 PM
3

If cheating is about betrayal and offense, then yes whether something is a compliment does matter. A man cheating isn’t somehow “different” just because he’s also willing to cum in the woman he’s cheating on. It’s a distinction without a difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:18 PM
15

“Want” is the operative word there. Plenty of men will keep a woman around because she’s the most convenient hole and they want to bust a nut on the regular. It’s in plenty of men’s interest to have an accessible woman who’ll always be home and willing to say yes often to sex, no foreplay or seduction needed. He probably won’t care if she’s enjoying it or if she gets off, either. He just wants to nut. So in reality it makes no difference. It’s not a compliment to a woman to be a bangmaid.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:09 PM
6

That said, let's not pretend it isn't a common trope that when men cheat it's "to get their dick wet," and when women cheat it's more socially sympathized with because it's often claimed they are victims of emotional neglect This probably just depends on who you ask and their own moral code. People who have cheated or even are at least open to the idea of cheating some day, are the ones who’ll find ways to justify the behavior. People will rationalize it if they want to avoid feeling guilt. When…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 10:04 PM
11

Men arguably also like the sweet submissive wife (Becky bucks??) because she does the chores and the childcare, making his life easy and low drama. The alpha baddie is more fun to chase.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:51 PM
2

They’re equivalent also in the sense that both are rare traits that have a big ROI. Any woman who’s gotten her boobs done could tell you it creates a big change in how much more noticed she is. Just like men’s height makes men stand out too. A woman with a good WHR is pretty common. Nobody with it is getting extra attention unless maybe she’s very thin or she has a fat ass, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:49 PM
17

“Men just like variety” is a convenient argument. If a woman keeps a roster or if she wants both a cute beta and an alpha bad boy, then that’s also “just variety.”
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:33 PM
24

“When men cheat it’s innocent like a handshake teehee”
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:25 PM
6

Main character syndrome much
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:22 PM
38

I think men who say this are biased because they’re mostly paying attention to women’s dating behaviors, not men’s; obviously because they’re interested in dating women. They hear the horror stories about women from their male peers, because people don’t care to gossip as much about their good dating experiences. So it’s easy to assume that the gender you’re attracted to is the shittier one. My experience as a woman is that I observe more men who are monkey branchers and have FOMO. Obviously bec…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:13 PM
3

Hardly anyone pays attention to that or talks about that though. Men idealize and talk about big tits just as much as women talk about 6ft+ men. And breast augmentation surgery (that looks good) is expensive and risky to health. It also requires upkeep surgeries. It’s a fine equivalent.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/03/26 09:00 PM
–

in experimental and online dating settings, Halo effect is real yeah, and looks are especially weighted heavily in those specific contexts where other social context is basically non existent. Because looks are the fastest way to judge people. This is the issue with society becoming less social. An example of the opposite of this is like the concept of “the office 10.”
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 05:07 PM
7

“It’s not reeeeeeal primal LUST unless I’m boring, unlikable, and homeless!”
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 04:47 PM
–

I wonder how true that is vs. maybe the people with certain preferences just feel permission to be loud about it? I feel like it’s less taboo now for women to say harsh things about men’s appearances, and now more people can see it and participate because of how algorithms work now. I also think the women see it as like revenge for how pop culture / men always talked about women’s bodies and also revenge on red pill rhetoric online, so they want to make men feel more self conscious. Because espe…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 04:41 PM
–

That’s fair, I just feel like there’s sexual tension in a guy being closer to my face. But both sound good!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 03:09 AM
–

I can’t imagine being attracted to a guy with bad posture.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 03:06 AM
–

Makes sense if it’s not something you really think about. Height is not something I paid much attention to growing up, but for whatever reason every guy I’ve ever crushed on was in the 5’7 - 5’10 range (I’m 5’7). Maybe it’s just a law of averages because that’s the avg height range for men in the US, but at this point in life I think a lot of our preferences just come from exposure. Like I have nothing against the taller guys, but maybe I’ve developed a preference for that range because it’s bee…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 03:03 AM
–

I think you should still feel free to share your opinion. I’m not in the committee, so it evens out.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 01:45 AM
–

I do think a lot of the hype around height is mostly about vibes, yeah. Women generally want to feel smaller and daintier, and height is just a really straightforward trait for feeling that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/03/26 01:09 AM
2

For me I feel small as long as the guy isn’t shorter than me. I don’t care for an actual height gap though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 06:29 PM
2

I think it’s nice to rest my head on his shoulder next to his neck, and I can reach his chest if we’re lying down. I can see both sides though.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 06:04 PM
2

Had a stranger stop and come up to me while passing by on the street to tell me my eyes were “devastating.” It was very polite and he went on his way. That made me feel nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 05:58 PM
1

Ooo I didn’t know that. I do prefer stubble the most.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 05:46 PM
1

I tend to agree but I think it’s an unpopular opinion.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 05:39 PM
4

A man being close to your own height is hot because when he’s standing near you his mouth is already pretty close to yours. Or your neck. Or ears. 😛
/r/PurplePillDebate11/03/26 05:33 PM
1

Emotional intimacy is an emotional state. It’s a shared feeling, not a service someone has done for me. We are talking in circles and you keep indirectly implying that I’m a gold digger (?) because I don’t feel comfortable with jumping in bed with men I’ve just met. you are, in fact, treating the desire for sexual intimacy with someone as transactionally conditional on the receipt of some other utility, My condition is emotional intimacy, which is not a payment a man gives to me for me to utiliz…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 01:21 AM
8

If you’re in spaces like this long enough, the arguments from the men with long standing grievance towards women really boil down to resenting us for any way we assert this autonomy. No, this is not a problem of All Men, it’s about the men who fall into internalizing dehumanizing beliefs about women as a way to deal with the frustrations they feel in their lives. Their problems are bigger than women, but they don’t see that, for plenty of reasons. Like idk how familiar you are with the OG red pi…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 12:35 AM
2

This all a whole bunch of personal opinions, and pretty smug ones at that. Usually when women here saying anything like this but with feminine coded stereotypes instead, it’s called “virtue signaling” and “narcissism.” So, not really much substance here to discuss.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/03/26 12:07 AM
11

No, violence is not a characteristic of gender, but only one gender has historically been able to monopolize it for political power. Why do you think matriarchal societies are not really a thing, unless they’re very insular, small, and diplomatic? Because women can’t use violence to mass oppress an out group. Men online who get together to cook up manifestos and endless reasons to dehumanize and infantilize us are very much dangerous, because they end up trying to justify why women don’t deserve…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 10:46 PM
–

Always the violence threat, there was just one in yesterday’s thread on “women filter on vanity metrics, like income, hobbies and politics.” (???) There will always be an excuse to wish violence on us because anything we do autonomously is wrong. Sexual violence is something women have faced since antiquity.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 05:39 PM
3

Taking meds are not directly tied to women struggling with dating? Lots of partnered women need medication to deal with modern life. What a weird thing to say. The men who chastise women here do not have women’s best interests in mind, they’re concerned with trying to increase their dating options. Women more often put quality before quantity, so we can’t really relate to y’all in that way so much.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 05:06 PM
1

Emotional intimacy is not a “utility” especially because it’s a mutual experience, wtf. Have you never been in a relationship? Where you are mistaken is that men who wait are doing so because they appreciate “you” more than they do “sex.” They wait because they are more desperate for the sex (because they have fewer options for obtaining it elsewhere) Well my personal experience has shown this to be untrue. My friends who sleep with guys more casually may or may not get a connection out of it, s…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:53 PM
4

I’ve seen guys here say their gender is oppressed because men pay more taxes than women do, but you only pay more taxes if you’re wealthier. Women are poorer and paid less, of course they have less money to give to the government. Lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:35 PM
1

Yes if I’m not seen as his best option, he should leave. I’m glad we finally agree!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:33 PM
1

“Honest” about men I’ve never met? I don’t know them, lmao. You seem to not understand what personal experience means.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:32 PM
1

No, he doesn't clearly see that. He simply wants to see how you act when you are attracted to someone. Then see if your actions show that you are attracted to him. That’s not how that works at all, sorry. I think you look at this too narrowly to understand, so I don’t care to keep trying to explain it to you. This conversation is not about you and not about a woman who just doesn't fuck immediately. It's more about those who fucked immediately with some men, but not with others. Again if he asks…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:29 PM
1

The longer you make him wait the more you can assure yourself that his primary interest is the sex. The waiting is the surest sign of thirst. My experience doesn’t match that at all. Even men on here agree that if they want sex and a woman isn’t giving it fast enough, they either push harder for it or they leave. I’ve had zero issue with men who know that I’m attracted to them early on because I do so through other actions. If a guy genuinely can’t read kissing / touching and enthusiasm as signs…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 04:26 PM
1

I’m not saying that guys aren’t horny, but if he’s horny then I at least want to feel like he’s not only looking to fuck. It’s simple. And my experience has shown me that men who just want to fuck get frustrated quickly, and they either start acting thirstier and less sincere, and/or they quietly leave. So, it works fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 03:10 AM
1

Sure of course. Intimacy continues to get deeper over more time. Idk if it was to you or another user, but I had said in this thread that I want enough emotional intimacy to feel like they like me more than they’re motivated by sex or are excited by the novelty of a new person. It’s not a specific amount of time, it’s an emotional state I need to reach.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 01:25 AM
1

You barely can know someone in just a few hours. Are you serious? Idk if you’re acting obtuse or if you’re genuinely confused, but I’ll assume the latter. If you don’t understand how that makes sense, we are probably just very different types of people and we don’t have to agree or understand each other. The good thing is that people are diverse enough, so the guys who get it are the ones I even had to worry about in dating. If you don’t understand the appeal in waiting for sex, then don’t do it…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 01:14 AM
1

Because it takes time to talk to each other enough to build up trust and emotional intimacy? …Obviously?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 01:03 AM
1

Time is needed to bond, I didn’t say it guarantees a bond…and if a guy isn’t that into me and perceives his other options are better for him instead, then clearly we were incompatible. That’s normal and fine.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 12:58 AM
1

Well that was a roller coaster of a post.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 12:38 AM
2

I feel like gender wars officially became mainstream when Andrew Tate came to fame.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/03/26 12:16 AM
11

I didnt say anything about advice. I said women 'preach" and try to manipulate and indoctrinate "inexperienced" men as you put it into their twisted feminist way of thinking. Since you’re being very vague, you wanna give an example of women here “indoctrinating” inexperienced men into a “twisted feminist” way of thinking? It sounds dramatic enough to warrant one. Dating issues arent "womens issues". They are societal issues and the fact you dont realize that just shows how strong your victim hoo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:55 PM
12

Ive seen women do the same exact thing with men and preach about what they should and shouldnt value in a partner/relationship. I’ve seen women here give advice to the very inexperienced men here when they’re asking to know what women desire from them. Women here rarely if ever ask for (manosphere-informed) men’s advice, because we’re here more to challenge TRP talking points. TRP directly talks down to women by telling us what our “nature” secretly is, because women are apparently too dumb or c…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:29 PM
12

Yes it is absolutely lose/lose no matter how a woman picks. We’re always wrong to these guys apparently, so you may as well just live authentically, and be observant and discerning.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:08 PM
14

Uh, men in this sub call women all kinds of gross moralized insults for the crime of not picking partners in the way they do. Calling it lopsided and unfair when we have different things to worry about and look out for than valuing quantity over quality. They don’t live as women, but want to tell us that they know better what we “really” want and what will make us happy. Infantilizing is the best word to describe it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 11:04 PM
11

Take this gold 🏆 Only credit I could give to OP is that I do think socialization such as stuff we see on social media can create FOMO in people, not just women. It makes people more dissatisfied even when they do apparently get what they “want” because we’ve become more antisocial as an increasingly atomized society. But that’s a wider social infrastructure issue, not a woman issue. Men here chastising women for looking out for ourselves and infantilizing us in saying we can’t be good judges of …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 10:31 PM
1

The title is fine and what's below does not contradict it. Titles are not science. If you don’t even care what the sourced research says, then I can’t take your arguments seriously. And again, you are given directions and can find plenty more source. Nah, the burden of proof is on you making the positive claim. Until then, neither sex is proven to be better at logical reasoning than the other. That’s how the scientific process works. More male Einsteins does mean they have higher capacity first …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 09:43 PM
1

No, you phrased it as a fact about sex-starved men in general. But it's only about men who approach you. Ok? Why should I care? I haven’t met the sex starved men who don’t talk to women at all and I don’t care to. This whole convo started because I was describing my experience with filtering people, and what worked for me. To answer the OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 09:36 PM
2

especially if your past shows that you did have sex with someone before all that. Idk what “before all that” means, but if some guy were to try to ask me “so how many calendar days did it take you to fuck your ex”, he clearly sees my body as a sex vending machine, with prices on it. That’s a hard pass. That would mean that you can be attracted to someone sexually right away. Yeah of course I can. Being sexually attracted to someone doesn’t mean I have to fuck them immediately though. I want to f…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 09:33 PM
3

More logically, not narrowly. It's says that very clearly. The title of the section says “men think logically” but the text from the research that is actually being sourced, literally right under that title, says: Females have a greater holistic perception, meaning observing and dissecting information with logic and intellect. Male’s trait is balanced by female intuition, which is known as highest form of intelligence [13]. So I don’t think you even read what the section says, I think you just s…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:58 PM
3

All your link seems to show is that men think more narrowly and women more holistically. Neither of those things indicate whether or not men are better at logical reasoning in general, i.e avoiding cognitive distortions and logical fallacies. For example, some cognitive distortions that are documented to be more common in men are conspiratorial thinking, and overestimation of their capabilities and intelligence. The “male hubris, female humility” phenomenon is one you can look up. Also if you ev…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:32 PM
1

They are free to assume so and pursue someone else, and I’m free to assume they’re more into sex than they are into me. Sounds like a win/win.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:21 PM
1

Who gives af about “data” on every man when I’m just talking about my own experience with thirsty men who approach, lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:16 PM
2

There are some male hobby dominated niches that are popular with a lot of women. Country or cowboy type dudes are one that come to mind. Those guys that like fishing, mudding, guns, whatever. I think niches work because we like to stereotype people, so we can project attractive qualities onto people who aesthetically fit the niche that we’re into, before we even speak to them. I think the scarcity factor probably helps too. I for one am into the slightly alt looking guys lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 08:08 PM
5

Nichemaxxing is so underrated if you’re anything less than chad/stacy tier imo. Edit: what a brain rot sentence lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 07:58 PM
3

You’re gonna have to be specific. What are “studies of brains” and how does that show men have better reasoning capacity?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 07:53 PM
1

I’m really not interested in very passive men either though. I prefer a man who shows some initiative and a positive attitude. I’d say most women generally want to repel most men, because it’s less work and filtering to do. Because you want to narrow it down to one guy in the end.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 07:51 PM
1

Of course I am only observing the men who are around me and approach me. Why would the men who are resigned and passive want to put energy into pursuing me? The men who pursue me out of thirst filter themselves out, leaving the guys who pursue me because they connect with my personality.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 07:44 PM
1

I’m not into guys who seek attention from strangers.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 07:20 PM
10

I doubt she has a “indiscriminate male sex drive”, because would she still do what she does without the fame and money? Highly unlikely. Her content is so extreme probably for a simpler reason, she’s trying to stand out in a saturated industry. Like how other content creators tend to function.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 06:19 PM
2

I don’t care if a guy’s slept with another man, but I do get icked if a guy shows signs of being generally reckless and super thrill seeking. That’s not someone I can see myself feeling safe with, because I’m the opposite. And so while high n count does correlate with more thrill seeking behavior, I don’t need to ask a guy’s n count to figure out if he’s compatible with me or not because there are better indicators to look at for compatibility. Also asking for n count is just a weird and invasiv…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 06:10 PM
4

Purposefully taking advantage of someone because they’re naive is immoral. The guy can’t do better unless he knows better, and simply paying for a meal is not “the wrong thing.” Normal people go on dinner dates under the assumption that there is some attraction present, not that it’s just a free meal service.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 05:57 PM
2

Gender wars are a hotter topic than ever imo, people just aren’t talking about it in PPD specifically anymore. Now that it’s more mainstream and algo boosted, there’s more echo chambers for people to hang out in and rage.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 05:35 PM
7

People already gave you good answers but I’ll add something else. “Type” is not something super rigid, nor is it only about looks, especially for women imo because our attraction depends on more behavioral factors too. Being as close to the stereotype of someone’s type will get you noticed the fastest and help build attraction the fastest, but that’s about it. My ex was someone who was not as close to the idea I had of my type, so I didn’t initially notice him or felt instant butterflies. But af…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 04:04 PM
1

They’re not getting assistance because they had “Chad’s kids”, they get assistance because they’re under the poverty line. Is assistance somehow ok with you if they had Billy Beta’s kids instead? You know who else gets more government assistance, in the US? The elderly, via medicare. And there are more elderly women to collect medicare than there are elderly men, because men die at earlier ages than women do.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 03:14 PM
1

A standard is requiring something no matter the circumstances. Full stop. A woman who requires a non-coffee date usually isn’t asking what kinds of first dates the man has been on before, to figure out his “normal” process, to determine if she’ll require something from him without doing anything to earn it. That’d be silly and weird because dating is not a paint by numbers. It’s clearly entitlement if a guy were to ask a woman “so how many calendar days did it take you to sleep with your exes?” …
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 01:53 PM
2

Yes he absolutely does! It’s sad, I wish he’d find someone professional to talk to about it, I’m the only one he really has these conversations with.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 01:38 PM
1

You don’t have to demand something out loud to have an entitled attitude about it. The attitude shows in feeling contempt towards the woman, instead of being curious about how you could make someone feel comfortable and seduced to have sex with you. The entitlement is in expecting special treatment that nobody automatically gets, without doing anything special to earn it. Sex does not get scheduled on a calendar when someone first meets you, and there is no standard operating procedure for how i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 01:18 PM
1

No because the entitlement in this case is that you expect certain treatment that someone else earned (sex after X amount of time), but you don’t think you should also have to earn it to get the same result. Having sex with a new person is not like a standard handshake greeting, you have to actually make the other person feel comfortable and seduced enough before they agree to jump in bed with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 12:05 PM
–

Yeah obviously the people who get paid the least amount of money are going to have less money to give to the government? And why shouldn’t the poorest get the most help compared to other wealth classes? You wanna give more to the rich instead? Or spend most of it on war like how it’s already done in the US?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 04:32 AM
14

You can’t avoid any type of bias in discourse because you’re arguing with humans. Also keep in mind that in gender war discourse spaces like PPD, a lot of the men that feel inclined to even participate come in from the manosphere side of the internet, a space that’s already very biased unfavorably and uncharitably against women. So places like PPD are not representative of the most popular opinions in the general population anyway. What I like about this sub is that no group is safe from critici…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 03:10 AM
6

He wonders why he's limiting himself to this bog standard relationship at length when his partner either had shorter more flighty relationships or outright bypassed relationships for intimacy. This seems to make sense if you think casual is superior to a relationship, and monogamy is something you’re forcing yourself into just to be socially acceptable. Like sex is more of a reward to you than a deep emotional connection. Basically it's a, "you broke 'the rules', why am I following them?" thing.…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/03/26 12:06 AM
–

Children grow up to get jobs and pay taxes, and society persists. You can’t complain about not caring about living in a society, and also be mad that poor families can get some help from social programs. Pick a struggle my dude.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 10:19 PM
8

My brother is red pill. He was always a ladies man and never struggled with getting girls growing up, but he struggles with getting the ones he thinks are hot enough. He’s got a FOMO mindset, and tends to sabotage things when they go well because he wants to be the one to hurt them first before he can get hurt (yes he’s told me this verbatim). He’s in his 30s and living a nomadic bachelor life, and claims to want to find the right woman and be a father one day. He’s struggling emotionally and fe…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 10:15 PM
–

I think a lot of people got sucked into these pill spaces before they got partnered. At least I did.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 09:57 PM
3

Society would cease to exist if nobody was birthing and raising the kids that go on to become future members of society that you claim mothers are “taking” from. Who raised you? You grew up feral in the woods or something?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 08:40 PM
2

They contribute in raising children and they still have to work jobs. A lot of them are workhorses and don’t get much time to themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 08:14 PM
4

Clearly it is about feeing inferior to the woman too if you feel a need to “catch up” in n count relative to her. If you’re a virgin and she’s had only 2 past partners, then you’d still feel bad. According to your op. Not that I’m disagreeing that men don’t get sexually jealous of other men, but clearly I think this is more deeply about being jealous that women can get something you want without working for it (because we have more to lose and less to gain from sex), meanwhile men have to work h…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 08:00 PM
5

Single moms are one of the most impoverished demographics, they’ve got my sympathy no matter their attitude. Leeches are the upper classes not paying their fair share of taxes, and enriching themselves from other people’s labor and favors from rich pedophiles.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 07:47 PM
2

Because if his n is lower then he’ll feel inferior to her, right? I’ve got a revolutionary idea. Men should change how they measure their own n count by basing it on how many times they have sex, not how many women they have sex with. Because if a woman chooses to keep coming back for sex, as opposed to her just leaving/ghosting soon after a ONS, then that’s a much better sign that he’s good in bed. No need to worry if you can perform well or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 07:28 PM
4

He probably knows which option he’s more willing to tolerate, so that is the one he will / should pick. Not sure why an outside opinion matters, especially if ethics supposedly don’t matter.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 05:03 PM
2

I kinda can’t ask on a first date when they fucked their previous dates (just whip out a calendar). Right because it gives the impression that you look at sex in an objectifying light, and you know that that’s unappealing. I’m trying to fix this because I’ve had to leave after having started committed relationships and then discovering we are incompatible through various situations; typically discovering information I had no intention of asking about post-commitment offered willingly by the soci…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 05:00 PM
2

You don't think that this relates to sexual compatibility? Not necessarily, no. Especially because a lot of sex happens under the influence of alcohol, which lowers inhibitions and is a shortcut to “comfort.” Plenty of times also my friends have been disappointed by guys who they slept with more quickly than others. The circumstances were just more conducive for sex. Women know in any moment if they feel sexually attracted to you, or not. Strongly disagree. Most if not all dates have high levels…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 02:30 PM
4

There are other factors outside of looks that go into how quickly a woman can feel comfortable enough to have sex, that are not in the woman’s hands at all. How forward or affectionate he is, how safe and relaxed he can easily make the woman feel, how early logistics are set up to make sex more likely to feel convenient to “just happen”. Women respond strongly to all these things because we usually take on a more passive role in the early stages. Even red pill seemed to grasp this. So women do n…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 08:09 AM
1

According to google: “Entitlement is the irrational belief that one deserves special treatment or rewards without earning them, often accompanied by a lack of gratitude and a sense of being owed.” If the shoe fits…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 07:08 AM
0

Purportedly yeah. On top of this the guys who seem to complain most about not getting the high n count they want seem to be more socially reserved and shy, more unwilling to risk rejection, less thirsty, etc.. All qualities that will not help them with getting a high n count.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 03:11 AM
1

Based on what? Vibes?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/03/26 02:22 AM
3

That’s fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 11:58 PM
3

Depends how you define a virtue signal, people tend to wield it as a vague insult however they like. Does it mean lying, unknowingly making a bad argument, or just saying anything positive about yourself / the group you belong to? I don’t think most people notice when they “virtue signal” because people want to believe that they have admirable qualities, and will find ways to show that to others somehow.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 11:57 PM
5

I don’t get how virtue signaling is something seen as more done by women. I see men here fluff up their egos this way just as much, but they just call it “stating facts” instead of moralization. It’s just something all humans are prone to. Examples are calling themselves more reasonable, realistic, honorable, honest, humble, accepting, meritocratic, intelligent, accountable, sacrificial, altruistic. My theory is that virtue signaling is seen as a form of self indulgence, and self indulgence is m…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 09:28 PM
6

The men’s judgements are accurate but the women’s somehow aren’t? You sound biased. If you don’t like what that evidence says, then at least link something that shows the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 08:57 PM
8

With hookups, you will always be remembered as desired, That’s only true if the sex was exceptionally good. Women often cringe at bad hookups they’ve had, and the average ones are forgettable. and you can always find a new person, so desire never ends. Guys seem to get tired of casual eventually. Not as quickly as women do, but they still do nonetheless.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 08:18 PM
9

I don’t believe in marriage that much anyway. It never lasts; desire always fades. If you really believe this, then it’d smarter to not have kids just for them to be brought up in a broken home. The only true desire that lasts is casual. How does casual desire “last” if it’s short term? Seems like the common denominator here driving most of the excitement is novelty, not a question of casual vs non-casual.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 08:10 PM
8

I think that’s a very bad outlook to have for marriage, you may as well expect to get divorced if you’re open to marrying just anyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 08:04 PM
7

Any guy can get laid a bunch if he lowers his standards enough, has low disgust response, and is extroverted enough and risk taking enough to continually practice flirting with many women. He will find enough women who say yes, and ones who say no don’t matter. and you will never have a problem finding a relationship. Not necessarily with the women he wants though. He’s in the same boat as any other random man. A quote I saw here once that I think sums this up: “your looks determine your league,…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 07:57 PM
–

While I don’t think being too pretty is ever the cause, I do think there could be plenty of other things that can factor into why a woman doesn’t get approached in a certain setting where other women are getting approached. Like I think if you’re considered anything less than the Staciest of Stacies in the room, then being unapproachable looking in any way can absolutely be a big factor.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 07:17 PM
3

Note my use of the words “the” and “definitive.” If kissing and touching aren’t clear enough signs of interest, then I think the guy has bigger problems. Define “emotional trust.” Enough bonding to reach the destination of what I already said: to feel like he’s into me for much more than just sex or the thrill of the novelty.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 06:14 PM
3

It’s also shown through flirting, kissing, and being touchy. You don’t have to fuck immediately to make it obvious that you’re attracted to them. I think you know this. Define “emotional intimacy”. Forming enough of a bond and emotional trust, to feel like he’s into me for much more than just sex or the thrill of the novelty.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 06:05 PM
1

we are arguing about the prevalence of such behavior. If you dont have any way to prove that it is as prevalent as you claim it is, then that only hurts your own argument. Are you asking me to pull out statistics on how common this belief set is in the manosphere? What percentage exactly is enough for you to warrant OP making a post addressing those men? I have a feeling you don’t actually approach other kinds of debates like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 05:57 PM
0

This is what OP said to you: The idea of SA being the victim's fault for tempting the perpetrator is widespread throughout society. I never heard of an individual majority-group person being grilled on what they wore or "why they were in that part of town anyway" before they got mugged or carjacked by a minority-group person. And I agree with them that this is a commonly held belief about women who are SA’d, especially by the manosphere men who get very riled up over the man vs bear question. Wo…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 05:39 PM
-2

So your experience is better than mine. Just because you weren’t online when those specific threads came up in PPD to read them, doesn’t mean I wasn’t there and saw the highest voted comments… And yes, I am pretty sure that is OPs argument. No, OP is saying that swapping out man vs bear for “green people” vs bear is not the same, because of the sexual evopsych arguments that are used to victim blame women who are SA’d. Did you not read the post you replied to?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 05:08 PM
2

Well I haven't, whos experience trumps whos? “If I wasn’t in those threads to see it, then it didn’t happen” um ok. Also are you saying that we are not allowed to complain about you comparing us to dangerous wild animals until every man under the sun stop saying things you dont like? Is that the argument? This is not OP’s argument though? I’m also not going to engage in your “comparing us to wild animals” argument because it’s always been a bad faith assertion here anyway. I’ll stay on topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:59 PM
1

Or people can just behave like adults and take it as a given that they will pay for their own meals. If someone offers that's great. deal? Some people agree and some don’t. Let them find their people. As long as plenty of men want to pay, especially without strings attached, then there will be women who prefer those men who want to impress. Otherwise why make it a big deal? The only person who seems to make this a big deal is you. Like you can’t take “no, I’m not interested in a second date” for…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:54 PM
1

I’ve seen this argued plenty of times in PPD, and they show high up under “best” sorted comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:38 PM
1

How would a man going on a date to get to know a woman know this? If you don’t want to ask them up front, then you find out through trial and error like with anything else. You know, which is the process of dating. Why even have the right to make your own money but yet still choose to be dependent on men to pay for your food like it’s the 1700s? Thats embarrassing. Because something that has stayed the same since the 1700s is that women have more to lose and less to gain in relationships with me…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:20 PM
1

I agree, but I think you meant to reply to the other guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:03 PM
1

You are just looking at it very narrowly. If one or both parties are under the assumption that person A will “pay” their share in a different role, then it’s not inherently unfair. The reason why this dating norm exists is because it is typically assumed to turn out that way. Idk why you keep ignoring this.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:02 PM
1

It’s through exposure over your lifetime, and also dependent on your own personality and interests.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:53 PM
1

It’s about objective reality, not personal opinion or perspective. Expecting other people to pay for you is already selfish enough, but to then stop liking them when they don't is even more selfish, objectively speaking. No, it’s not “objective” reality. You are a guy with an opinion, not an arbiter of morality. If this discussion is so important for you, then make a post asking women for their side of the debate. A woman not liking you is not immoral, she’s just not compatible with you 🤷‍♀️ tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:48 PM
1

These guys don’t hate on Chad because they idolize him and aspire to be like him in the hierarchy they believe in. So women are the easier target. Next question.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:41 PM
1

No, coz you wouldn't respond to someone yelling at a cloud. Yes I would, guys make posts like this all the time, and people tell them the same thing. To save your energy for something that matters, and make the discussions in here better. Well, women are the kind of people to go on a date with a man and base their feelings towards him on whether or not he pays so... No gender is more Wonderful, and you two are just incompatible. You think she’s selfish and she probably sees you the same. You get…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:33 PM
1

So this post is like you yelling at the clouds then. And no, I don’t think women are any more entitled and self-centered than men are. People are just selfish in different ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:27 PM
2

The reality is most men pay because they know if they don't, there's a very high chance the woman will stop liking them. Then they should be principled and hold out for the women they want who don’t care about men paying. It’s their life. And women tend to choose to be traditional where it suits them without reciprocating, thats the point. Either gender will do this because people are self-interested first. Just find the person who is compatible enough with your desires and standards. If you thi…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:11 PM
2

People will pick and choose the roles that suit them. Some women want to be SAHMs, some men want to feel important by spending money. But like I also said, if someone is not generous but wants to date generous people, they shouldn't expect people who can see through this to not comment on it. The argument was that women are also already being generous in their own way, by doing the work men more often don’t want to do. If those men didn’t think it was a good deal, they wouldn’t agree to pay / be…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 02:58 PM
5

Yes. Well then most men are entitled because this is the default in the home. Anyway, I think people should have whatever expectations they want, and find the person who is compatible with them. Where do you think these gender roles came from? The oldest religious beliefs that say men should wield wealth and authority, while women should be relegated to the domestic sphere.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 02:21 PM
3

The problem isn’t someone being in a position of authority, it’s who’s allowed to gain access to authority (and therefore autonomy). When authority qualifications are either explicitly or implicitly based on being male, that tells you enough about how that political system works. It’s that simple.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 02:15 PM
1

So then are the men entitled when they default to expecting the women to generously do most the domestic chores, caregiving, and primary role in parenting? It takes two to tango. These have always been the default gender roles, it’s nothing new. Yes, which is why they stroke their egos. Don't you get it? Good luck trying to convince men to collectively not be the hornier sex lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 02:07 PM
1

The example of women being less financially generous on dates. Thats the point. Don't you think there is something men want from women? Sex, yeah? Men are responsible for their own libidos. Idk what else there is to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 01:54 PM
5

So then why’d you use that example? Maybe give a better one if you’re trying to explain what you mean. People will stroke your ego if they’re trying to get something out of you. Or sometimes even try to hurt your ego (neg) to make you easier to control.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 01:44 PM
4

They want men to have qualities that they themselves don't have. For example, many women will justify demanding that men pay for dates by saying they like generous men, meanwhile they themselves aren't generous at all. They’re operating from the position of looking for a man who fits more of a provider role, similar to how a lot of men expect women to take on more of the domestic and caregiving roles. Wanting someone to perform a certain role doesn’t necessarily come from hypocritical beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 01:02 PM
–

Sometimes it’s the woman asking to make the relationship serious though.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:47 PM
5

The boss is ultimately the one who decides anything. He can act benevolent, shitty, whatever he (or the man) wants. Men are given more control and autonomy because women are seen as not deserving the same autonomy despite also being humans. This can only be justified through prejudice, an expression of contempt and hatred.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:46 PM
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If two people are already testing the waters, who decides more if it progresses to something more? Seems it can be either person.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:40 PM
3

Nobody claims they are logical robots, just that they are more logical than women. Based off of nothing except vibes lol
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:32 PM
1

Holy circlejerk of a thread. Mods asleep?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:27 PM
7

“Just because you’re beneath me in the hierarchy doesn’t mean I look down on you” lmfao
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:26 PM
7

I’m totally fine with repelling them too, they’re not that different to me. Especially if they feel entitled to my body.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 12:05 PM
–

Asking someone out doesn’t necessarily lead to a relationship though. It could lead to just sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 11:50 AM
3

My experience is in dealing with men like that, and noticing how they start acting increasingly upset, eager, and thirsty the longer I observe them. Men are not good at hiding their sexual impatience at all ime.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 11:42 AM
4

You only become the lesser option when you signal that you’re not attracted enough to him to not see sexual intimacy transactionally by playing the “waiting game.” You can show someone that you’re attracted to them without needing to fuck them first. This is very simplistic. If we have options we will choose women who actually want us over those who only want us conditionally and are willing to use sex transactionally. Yes my condition is that I want more emotional intimacy before sexual intimac…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 11:34 AM
10

Nope, you just repel the men who have other options. If a guy sees me as a lesser option, then why would I possibly want to date him? This is literally a vetting bonus. The men that wait aren’t waiting because “they don’t see you in a sexual light.” They wait because they have to. I didn’t say they don’t see me sexually at all, I am not asexual; they just don’t see me as only sexual. You left out the operative word.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:26 AM
9

If choosing among the approaching men, if you don’t wait until sex later you still end up wasting a lot of time filtering through sex prioritized men. Some of those men may be sex starved men and will still keep holding out, so that can be an issue as well. Speaking from experience, the sex starved men are very impatient, and will get increasingly annoyed and insincere the longer they go without sex, if they don’t just quietly leave entirely. They’re very easy to spot, and it doesn’t require any…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:22 AM
9

Sure but if your priority is to repel the men who see you only in a sexual light, then avoiding early sex is the most efficient way to do that. Not all women share that priority however.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 04:16 AM
–

But if women are hypergamous according to the guys here then are women mostly getting gatekept? See the answer is different depending on who you ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:59 AM
9

And also the men who don’t care for casual. The men who want casual but don’t have many options will still either get obviously annoyed, start acting thirsty, or just quietly select themselves out. Many such cases.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:57 AM
8

It’s really that simple. Want to repel the men who like flings? Just don’t have sex until later. Plenty of women don’t care about this and actually want to test for sexual compatibility early as a higher priority, but if you don’t care about that as much then this is a smart way to operate.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:50 AM
1

Sure I guess, find your crowd. Idc if you’re a slut or not.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:39 AM
18

Sure, it’s normal. When you’re getting to know someone you’re still learning things about them and seeing different sides to them. You can think someone’s initially attractive enough / with little info on them, and then if enough ick comes up it can cancel attraction. It’s usually not one thing that’s a standalone dealbreaker, but just multiple little things that add up.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:37 AM
1

Then go off and enjoy those women. Live your best slutty life!
/r/PurplePillDebate28/02/26 03:29 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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