TheRedArchive

~ archived since 2018 ~

divingrose77101 Archive

View 16 posts and 2,385 comments by divingrose77101 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
Search in:
In subreddits:
More
Filter by year/month:
Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
87

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate17/01/22 02:28 PM
28

Question For Mendivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:21 PM
24

CMVdivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/22 03:09 PM
19

Debatedivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:42 PM
18

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 01:26 PM
13

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate09/01/22 02:42 PM
11

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:24 PM
11

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate18/01/22 01:09 PM
9

Question For Mendivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/22 10:36 PM
8

Discussiondivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate12/01/22 09:10 PM
5

CMVdivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/22 03:17 PM
5

Question For Mendivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 01:03 PM
1

DISCUSSIONdivingrose77101/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/12/20 01:33 AM
1

CMVdivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/22 11:17 AM
0

Debatedivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:09 PM
0

Question For Womendivingrose77101/r/PurplePillDebate10/01/22 08:19 PM
Showing the 1,000 most recent of 2,385 comments.
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
–

You kind of steered the topic towards the law of child support
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 09:08 PM
–

Seems fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 08:07 PM
–

I can trust him or not trust him. There’s nothing I can do about it. He spends the money the way he sees fit. That’s the law.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 08:04 PM
–

He loves his kids insofar as he is capable, but neither his kids nor I were surprised by his ultimatum. Thank you. I’m moving to be closer to the kids soon. At least I have the ability to do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 05:21 PM
–

Statistically, education is the only way for women to make good money.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 05:19 PM
–

I don’t know why. My ex husband married his mistress 5 weeks after the ink was dry on our divorce. There was no point bringing it up because the courts don’t care if someone has a mistress and an expensive escort habit.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 05:07 PM
–

He gave the kids a deal: you can stay with your mom but I take the car away and you can figure out how to pay for college on your own. I totally get it. Who doesn’t want to live in a house with two waterslides? I’d pick that too. My poor babies didn’t have a choice so I didn’t have a choice so I gave up fighting.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 05:06 PM
–

The courts don’t care about cheating
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:38 PM
–

He is now.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:33 PM
–

I didn’t say anything about value. Kids are expensive. It’s stupid to have kids before you have money.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 04:33 PM
–

Correct. It’s also my personal preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:39 PM
–

My ex husband is a literal multi-millionaire with an oceangoing sailing yacht and a pool with two waterslides. I still pay him child support because it doesn’t matter how much money he actually has, it matters that I suffer for his benefit.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:38 PM
–

Because it’s stupid. How is she supposed to support herself and their kid if he dies or something? Stupid stupid people having babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:36 PM
–

I’m the same. I would never date a man who argues with women online. Or is online. Social media is for women. I’m surprised you don’t know that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:36 PM
–

What’s a white dragon?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:05 PM
–

You had a child with a woman with no education? Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:04 PM
–

I think divorce should be way cheaper and easier. In fact, I don’t even believe in marriage at this point. Marriage should have a renewal process so you have to re-up every year. An opt-in.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 03:03 PM
–

So, if you initiated the divorce, you’d be happy to pay?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:47 PM
–

I mean, you identify as red pill. It’s a reasonable assumption on my part that you meant what you said. Now you’re walking it back. Fine. But I don’t believe you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:44 PM
–

Celebrity women pay spousal support all the time when they get divorced. This was a question specially for men but I would absolutely throw money at an ex (and do without complaint) to get the peace I need.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:42 PM
–

I am from another era. It may be different for young people.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:40 PM
–

That would be my ideal in a relationship
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:40 PM
–

How so?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:39 PM
–

I think red pill men are actually just pink pill women with penises.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:38 PM
–

I mean, you told on yourself with your original wording. I wish I had the audacity.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:37 PM
–

This is my exact life. I know first hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:37 PM
–

I got my master’s degree while I was pregnant with my first child and was working as a project manager. Then I was a stay at home mom and part-time technical writer for 14 years. It’s been eight years since my divorce and I’m still not financially stable the way my ex husband is. Not even close. I am climbing the ladder in my career field as fast as humanely possibly and always work a second job, but I can’t afford a mortgage or a vacation. I have zero debt or credit cards and it’s a nightmare t…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:36 PM
–

If you made her stay at home?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:05 PM
–

If a person has been a stay at home parent for more than 10 years, it will likely take another 10 years for them to become financially stable. Getting “a job” isn’t enough money for a whole household.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:03 PM
–

That seems reasonable if you married a woman without an education.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:02 PM
–

As someone who pays child support, I don’t care if it goes towards the kid or their dad. It’s all one pot of household finances.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:02 PM
–

You wouldn’t want the mother of your children to be financially stable?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 02:00 PM
–

If you were married to a very wealthy woman, would you want alimony if she divorced you?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 01:08 PM
–

A true mentor is not a predator. That’s the difference.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/08/26 01:05 PM
–

Have you ever heard the phrase “correlation is not causation?”
/r/PurplePillDebate15/08/26 04:43 AM
1

That isn’t my point. You’re arguing against a point I never made.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 07:55 PM
–

Literally everyone learns math in school.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 07:36 PM
1

This post is not at all about what the partners rely on each other for. If you want a post like that, make it yourself. This is my post. If a man can’t get sex from his partner and they break up, he can go get sex elsewhere. There is no loss to him for the time he was in the marriage. Neither partner was “practicing dating” during the relationship. They are equally rusty in those skills insofar as that is even a thing. He doesn’t give that up while she retains it. If a woman gives up her career …
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 07:34 PM
0

It’s not ideal for the kids either.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 06:01 PM
1

No one cares. You don’t harm your long term prospects at having food in your mouth and being able to pay for your kids’ college if you have a good or bad sex life. This is about economics. Not your fantasies.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 06:00 PM
0

I did the math on the cost of leaving and the cost of staying and stayed as long as it was humanly possible for the sake of my kids. The cost of leaving was losing my kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 04:48 PM
1

I was one of those women. I know exactly why I stayed.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 04:01 PM
–

The guys I’ve gone out with long enough to mention past partners have just shrugged when I told them about past partners. Why should they care?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:34 PM
–

Do you agree with OP on why it isn’t a double standard? What about sex with men is so devaluing to people?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:33 PM
2

Yes. I use my logic and rational thinking to interpret my urges and emotional responses and act accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:25 PM
–

Don’t decide to learn math at 30.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 03:24 PM
–

You’re not new. You’re grown. Act like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:44 PM
–

You’re not my student. It’s your own responsibility as a grown ass man to learn this stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 11:30 AM
–

That’s just juvenile petulance. Zero women find that attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 11:29 AM
–

You are still asking someone else to do the work for you. You’re not my employee or my student or any child at all. I am actually giving you valuable help regarding what women want and you refuse to hear it in your insolence and petulance. Why is the onus on me to learn about the world through reading and listening and thinking deeply about issues and you just want a woman to do all that for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 11:28 AM
1

Well, maybe he should have treated her better, I guess. Most of my friends who got divorced got cheated on by their husbands.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 11:24 AM
1

I’m not going to beg. You know how to vet feminist causes. You know where to find information.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:14 AM
2

You: tell me what women want Me: tells you You: not like that This is a rinse and repeat of every conversation I’ve ever had about this topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 01:02 AM
2

No. It’s because this question has been asked and answered. A million times. By a million women. I am placing this post in contempt. Asked and answered. So stop asking.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:41 AM
1

We have already been telling you for decades, bro. You’re not listening. What do you think the feminist movement is? It’s women telling everyone what we want. Listen.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:40 AM
2

You’re missing the point. You asked what women want and I told you and YOU got defensive. You asked and I answered and now you’re rejecting the answer because it isn’t helpful to you. You’re not here to grow, you’re here to take something women have in their brains and try to turn it into leverage to get more women to mine resources from.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:38 AM
1

The first thing I would do it get on a computer and google it because I don’t expect other people to do my mental labor for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:33 AM
1

Therein lies the crux. I agree we are animals but if you treat people like animals it never goes well.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:32 AM
3

Asking women to do your research for you is lazy. We have been shouting from the rooftops what we want. We’ve had whole movements for decades about it. Yet, here you are, asking me to help you understand what women want and to vet the sources of information you use to learn that. My high school students can figure out if a source is valid or not. Aren’t you grown?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:31 AM
4

Whatever floats your boat man. It’s not my business what kind of morons you outsource your critical thinking to.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:15 AM
2

We. Don’t. Want. You. To. Ask. Us. You just asked what women want. Experts have written countless books on this. Read one written by a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:14 AM
1

No human makes decisions with no logic at all, except in rare outbursts. Women are not as prone to those but they happen. It is dehumanizing to pretend women make decisions based on animal instinct.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:12 AM
0

Literal whole books are written about this very topic. Go find one. One of the things women like is when men don’t outsource their thinking to us. Go read a book.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/08/26 12:07 AM
1

Then you completely misunderstand the purpose and function of the prefrontal cortex. We have logic and reason to override our ancient instincts. They may influence our initial internal reaction but there is no reason a woman with a fully functioning brain would be making decisions based solely on those instincts. That’s ridiculous. It is by dehumanizing a woman into “women” that you forget they are cognizant creatures with fully functioning reason. They’re making decisions based on whatever crit…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:21 PM
2

Well yeah, try to keep your spouse interested in spending time with you. That’s a very good method for having a healthy relationship. If all women are nesters, why do many of them not have kids? I don’t think your experience is supported by data. Any time you think a fully functioning human woman is making a complex life decision because her ancient mammalian ancestors made nests is laughably naive.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 11:00 PM
0

You understand that most women stay with men long after the attraction is gone because of loyalty and shared history and often genuine love. Very few women are jumping from husband to husband trying to level up like Donkey Kong.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 10:11 PM
1

After my divorce eight years ago, I made it my goal to build a life so beautiful and rich in friendships and connections that I never had to think twice about walking away from a man. My life with a special person in it is demonstrably better than single life but my single life is good enough that I won’t ever have to be stuck in a crappy relationship again. This wasn’t about making myself more attractive to a partner or ready to be in a relationship (although I have done a fair bit of therapy t…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 09:20 PM
1

They’re at least reciprocal, if that word feels better in your soul. We’ve all had a friend who was too much work and didn’t give the way they took so we dumped them. Because they weren’t pulling their weight in the relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 09:13 PM
1

Not for me to decide. If you get loved, I guess you’re worthy?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:53 PM
1

Who told you relationships aren’t transactional?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:52 PM
1

I might be a toephobia bigot but can I just rebrand it as a kink and get a pass? I am only into men in socks and shoes and maybe some house slippers if he’s feeling casual. It’s my kink.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:52 PM
2

What does that mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:50 PM
1

Every person I’ve ever talked to who rejects feminism for its methods and says “well, I’d fight for women’s rights if they would just do it the way I want them to” is not an ally and never will be. I don’t have a choice. I have daughters. I have a son. I HAVE to keep fighting for them. You can say “meh. Call me when you ladies have feminism totally figured out and then maybe I’ll lend some support.” This is the story of The Little Red Hen. When it was time for the bread to be made, no one wanted…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:50 PM
3

My question as well.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 08:45 PM
6

Interesting that you say that. I actually lived in Papua New Guinea for almost three months in 1993. It was an incredible place to live and learn about culture and nature. I was in the highlands in a village called Hana working on a hospital. You’re just saying “oh you don’t like the abuse I give you? How about you go get abused by someone worse!” That isn’t really a flex. The answer is no thank you to any abuse in any nation by any man towards any woman. Anything short of that is failure.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:39 PM
1

Oh, I am absolutely not inherently worthy of love. I have earned my place in people’s hearts like everyone else does- consistent kindness and showing up for people.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:36 PM
1

I mean, worth means the value you bring. What other measure of worth would there be?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:35 PM
1

Of course there’s no universal standard. It’s just between individuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:35 PM
1

For sure. Any man who supports the patriarchy is also a party to his own oppression. I don’t think there will be any empathy between genders until men embrace feminism and reject patriarchy.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:58 PM
3

Women all get rejected too.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:57 PM
1

I guess so. I kind of am a man toe bigot but I’m working on it. I feel like toes should be kept hidden until date 9 or so.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:56 PM
0

I disagree. I think most people aren’t worthy but they think they are.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:55 PM
4

That is entirely incorrect. Zero humans get loved just for existing unless you count how your parents love you (and even that sometimes has to be earned). Every woman and every man must DO something to be worthy of the love and company of other people. I don’t care what your religion teaches you or a therapist said about everyone’s inherent value, but no one is created special at birth and worthy of love. We are humans and have rights insofar as society says we do, but we have no inherent right …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:49 PM
4

The “loneliness epidemic” is just a collective social media tantrum because women aren’t willing to be pushed around anymore. Not my problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:43 PM
2

Is everyone worthy of love or is that something you earn?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:34 PM
5

Is anyone worthy of love just for existing? I don’t think so. I think you have to earn it. For better or worse, no one is going to love you just for existing. Maybe your parents.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:20 PM
4

I don’t think it matters the motivation behind any preference at all. It’s just a preference. I don’t like to date men who show up in sandals to a date. Is that bigotry against people with toes? I don’t like to date bald men. Preference. I don’t date broke men or men without a degree. It doesn’t mean I deny the humanity or have any hatred or disgust for men who haven’t been to college. I just don’t go on dates with them. Not wanting to date a bald man or a bisexual man is just a preference. It d…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 05:19 PM
1

Frankly, it doesn’t sound like it
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 12:21 PM
7

I think you’ve touched on an important thing. It’s not the things you do to try to impress a woman that impresses her. It’s the personal growth you do behind the scenes and the authenticity with which you show up to connect.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 06:48 AM
5

Correct. These things are just marketing campaigns built on insecurity and dreams. We are all susceptible but it’s easier to avoid if you know how it works. Christianity is the same that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 04:51 AM
2

Everyone is insecure. That’s why the marketing works.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 03:48 AM
4

Tell that to the podcasters and book sellers and Instagram influencers who make money off red pill courses and the like. It’s a huge market.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 03:48 AM
1

Cool
/r/PurplePillDebate13/08/26 12:22 AM
4

I don’t doubt marketers use every method that works on both men and women but I think the trend I’ve explained still stands.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 11:52 PM
8

Historically, advertising has targeted ‘deficits’ in women whereas advertising aimed at men uses an ‘aspirational model.’ The first says: you’re not enough, buy this product to be sufficient The second: you can be this amazing if you buy this product There are modern trends that don’t follow this model and the incel/red pill market it ripe for marketing targeting men’s insecurities, but that’s a newer shift.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 11:23 PM
–

You want us to give up fighting for our rights to have true equality throughout the whole world, to create a society that protects children instead of exploits them, and to enjoy rights to our own bodies to be… (checks your comment)… more feminine and likable? You see how dumb that sounds, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 10:41 PM
–

You’re just now noticing the worldwide movement of feminism shows up in movies? Born yesterday? Yes, child. This is how the message spreads on purpose. Through every means possible. We will continue this until the patriarchy relents. You will never see the end of feminism in your lifetime and women are only getting more and more powerful.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 10:39 PM
–

If you don’t provide evidence of your point, you’re just speculating and how can I take you seriously? Gut feelings about how the world has changed isn’t the same as data.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:19 PM
–

“Mocking men on social media” is your example of feminist government propaganda?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:08 PM
6

Better how?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:06 PM
1

If you’re asking if I’ve been intimate with unattractive men and enjoyed it, the answer is a resounding yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:06 PM
3

Why not? And why single out feminism from other other systems that also don’t work?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 07:05 PM
1

What is it then?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:28 PM
4

There we have it. You’re willing to criticize what we have but not even suggest something better. That means you just want feminism to go away. You don’t want equality at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:26 PM
1

Why don’t you implement the best system for creating equality then? What is it?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:20 PM
2

Literally everyone lies. But, you haven’t presented any evidence they are lying.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:08 PM
-2

Proving my point.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:07 PM
1

That is incorrect. I can absolutely know from dancing with him.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 06:07 PM
7

I don’t believe you. I think you won’t stop complaining about feminism until it goes away and you can have everything you want.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:50 PM
1

Absolutely. I don’t go for a guy who is obese or doesn’t take care of himself, but I need a person to stimulate my brain to become interested in them sexually. A guy doesn’t need big muscles or a handsome face to do that. He just needs to be smart and articulate and well educated and thoughtful. I can think of a guy I have a crush on right now who is not at all traditionally handsome. He has a fair bit of scarring on his face from teenaged acne and he’s not the kind of handsome that flys well in…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:47 PM
–

Do you have evidence for any of this wild speculation? All humans live in a society today with access to journalism. That’s not new or just for women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:44 PM
6

Why do you like men better?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:30 PM
–

It is only a power struggle because men won’t willingly give women rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:29 PM
–

The “government” doesn’t need to fund a worldwide movement that’s been going on for decades. Women do that. Feminism is necessary for women to be safe and happy. Full stop. Any man who hates feminism doesn’t want women to be safe and happy. Full stop. You are suggesting we just stop our pursuit of freedom and happiness so you can get laid. Does that sound like a good deal to you? The answer is no.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:28 PM
–

That fact that you are speaking for all women and why they do things literally negates any of your points. It’s totally subjective to your fantasy of how women think and why they do things. No factual evidence anywhere. You’ve lost this argument with Present Afternoon big time, bro.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 05:24 PM
1

I am very old and I have found that my friends always stick around longer than a romantic partner. Why would I prioritize someone who won’t be around in six months over people I’ve known since I was a child?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 04:08 PM
2

I have paid for both first dates and subsequent ones but it is rare. Most guys refuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 04:07 PM
1

Yes. I was raised to be complicit in my own oppression. Just like a lot of men and women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 04:00 PM
1

I mean sexually attracted. If you are looking for a partner, that seems reasonable.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 03:58 PM
1

Oh. Poor coping mechanisms?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/08/26 03:56 PM
6

Giving without asking anything in return is the hallmark of a fully functional adult human.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:36 PM
5

Hahaha! Okay man. Get on with your hyperbolic self
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:20 PM
6

Men turn on each other like rabid dogs.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:07 PM
2

I have absolutely paid for dates and vacations for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:01 PM
2

Are you needing a great deal of self preservation and recovery in a regular Dario bf experience?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:00 PM
4

You think it is a burden to treat people with respect? Jesus
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 05:45 AM
-2

Sure man. That’s one narrow way of looking at it. I am a woman and I’m a gentleman. I am also a dancer and a decent lead. It’s not a facade when I treat my dance partner with respect and care and concern for her safety, boundaries and fun. I do that because she’s my (checking your comment) subordinate? That’s not even close to right. It’s an honor to have someone accept your offer to dance, man or woman, and you darn well be a gentleman about it. That’s how I live all my life. As a gentleman.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 05:35 AM
6

Small imagination
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 04:54 AM
2

Paying for a date isn’t the complaint here. It’s just one small thing on a list of things that add up to just being a gentleman.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 04:53 AM
5

I’m asking you to speculate why a woman might choose to pay for a whole date.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 04:33 AM
6

No. I mean pay for the whole date.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 04:02 AM
7

It is not helping someone to force them to be the way you want them to be. That’s called controlling them. You don’t want to help women. You want to control them. That’s totally different.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 04:00 AM
3

Then why do some women pay for the date?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 03:56 AM
16

These men that you are criticizing, both the men who pay for dates and the men who defend women, are just good people. Have you tried being a good person?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 03:56 AM
2

I was just asking what about it was work and you said the relating part and I agreed. Relating to people well requires the work of giving selflessly of yourself. It is a lot of work.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:45 AM
1

Thankfully, the kids are not part of the equation. Empty nest and all. I really do have the option to do what is best for me (now). When I was raising kids, that wasn’t really an option. I do think trust is the whole thing. I couldn’t readily say yes or no without more information about who he is as a human. But we agree this is not a decision to be made hastily. Some green flags are that he has machine like consistency in communication and showing up. Two dates a week like clockwork (with reser…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:42 AM
0

Anyone can easily give that which costs them nothing. It’s only in self-sacrifice that you find the depths of your core. What kind of relationship would it be if both partners only gave what was easy? That’s like a casual acquaintance at work.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/08/26 12:29 AM
1

You can’t be a good partner and not be selfless. Full stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:59 PM
1

I am tempted to take the offer because of the lifestyle it would give me. I do okay but not ‘quit my job and retire at 55 and travel the world’ kind of okay. In theory, I would be happy to let someone call the shots in my life. I’m tired of deciding everything all the time. But, how could truly trust someone to have my best interest at heart when making decision? How could I submit myself to an authority and still remain me?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:57 PM
0

If I got a lot out of relationships, I wouldn’t have been single the last 8 years. I get everything I need, emotionally, from my friends and family.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:40 PM
0

It is true that a majority of predators are opportunistic and they will take advantage when they have opportunity. This won’t fix that. But it would give a lot of angry men a possible way to be less angry and thus give up their rabid goal of bringing all women downs
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:38 PM
0

Yeah. Relating to people takes some real selflessness and a giving attitude. It’s not always easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:18 PM
1

You lost the path here.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:10 PM
-1

You are the one who asked “what would be the point of dating”
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:09 PM
1

I am not going to be more specific. It’s not your business what resources I have. Carry on.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:06 PM
1

Your comment was about why I don’t like having conversations with random drunk people in bars
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:06 PM
0

You said unless the man wants to have sex it’s not a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 11:04 PM
0

Of everyone was asexual, that would be the only kind of partner left
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:58 PM
1

I do have an offer on the table for a lavish lifestyle with a lovely partner but I would have to give up my job. When I told him my reservations about giving up my career (again) like I did for my ex-husband, he understood and offered financial security to address that. That’s about as princess as it gets and it’s still something I have to think about. There isn’t a dollar amount so far that can justify the loss of control and freedoms. Whatever happened to power couples?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:57 PM
0

Not necessarily just having sex but I have other resources that men want to mine. Many of them want to take and take and take. The rare man is a giver.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:54 PM
1

If someone doesn’t show some vulnerability on date one, they’re aren’t authentic enough to even consider building a future with. It’s about authenticity. If you don’t “go deep” I know you are hiding yourself. That’s no foundation for connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:53 PM
-3

I never have sex on a first date so anyone who wants to have sex with me is going to have to ensure a whole ass coffee date without getting their junk played with at some point. Poor baby.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:52 PM
1

Everyone wants to be treated well. That’s not being a princess. I have found that more successful men are interested in me giving up my career to focus on them. Not in this lifetime.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 10:24 PM
1

I have to like someone enough to let them live in my house first. Not happening. Plus, I’m only attracted to men who are more ambitious than I am. Hard to find.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 09:56 PM
5

Stop calling them females to start.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 09:28 PM
1

I also do everything in my household and I would absolutely pay a partner anything they wanted to not have to do it all alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 09:28 PM
-1

What about it is work to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 09:26 PM
1

So you do know the cons, you’re just pretending there aren’t any. Interesting.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 09:15 PM
6

Not really.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 08:49 PM
2

Why not get experience now?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 08:41 PM
1

You would live with someone and not have sex with them for years? Good luck with that. That’s just a roommate. Sexual incompatibility is very much and thing. Your method sounds very religious and that’s fine but just know, you won’t increase your chance of finding and keeping a long term relationship healthy with this method. It’s for people with no connection to reality.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 08:04 PM
1

How would you even know?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 07:23 PM
8

You get told to marry them when you’re still a kid by your religious parents. And you’re told that men aren’t supposed to go chores. And you’re raised to be a servant to men. That’s how.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 07:01 PM
1

Years in relationship without sex? What if you’re not sexually compatible or can’t live in the same house without driving each other crazy?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 07:00 PM
1

By waiting to have sex, that’s all you can think about. It becomes some holy grail of connection that may or may not live up to the hype. This necessarily shortens the courting period from a necessary 3-4 years to know you’re compatible long term to how ever long your hormones will let you. The better you know your partner before you commit your life to them, the better your chances of having a healthy relationship. First loves aren’t special just because young people have raging hormones and ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:28 PM
1

If the very nature of a life partner changed to not include sex, we’d likely have different criteria for our choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:06 PM
1

Yes
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:05 PM
1

The chemical part is true. The “binding together” part is made up to try to control people’s decisions about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:05 PM
0

Tables don’t cost billions of dollars. You can get one on Facebook marketplace for like $500.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 06:04 PM
1

If you have never been a reluctant stay at home parent pouring every ounce of your energy and soul into building a family and financial empire, then you don’t know the cons.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 05:30 PM
-2

Sure, princess.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 05:29 PM
1

Are you in a religious cult like I was when I was young?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 05:28 PM
1

If you are the stay at home person, yes, you need all the benefits of working outside the home insofar as that is possible.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:00 PM
2

I know the average daily cost of living because I pay all my bills like a grownup. A partner who makes the income and nickel and dimes the house partner is not responsible enough to have that role. If you’re a provider, provide.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:46 PM
1

If you’re giving up what you want to be doing to become a homemaker, you need compensation. I didn’t choose it. It was chosen for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:44 PM
1

I can not wait for those sex robots to become cheap and easily available for all men. I think the world might be a very different place if every man was getting laid every time he wanted and no women were getting hurt in the process.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:06 PM
–

Everyone enjoys being seen as hot.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:14 PM
7

It’s still like that. Don’t be daft.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:08 PM
16

I already don’t need money from men. Why would I start?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:07 PM
0

Sex in a relationship is very important to me as well. That’s why I’d never go on a date with a guy who tries to have sex with every woman he goes on a date with. If a man is willing to just put his dick in every woman who gives him some attention, I don’t want him. I need to know my partner also values deep intimacy and physical connection.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:06 PM
2

That wasn’t my question
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:45 PM
1

That sounds like the dream
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:44 PM
2

You blame everyone but yourself for your own actions.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:43 PM
1

So you only pay for and plan dates to get sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:42 PM
1

And what would she get in return?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:42 PM
2

It seems exactly split among blue and red pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:41 PM
-1

Every kind. That’s what first dates are for. If someone doesn’t go deep with me or share interesting things, I don’t want a second date.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:37 PM
1

It make you sound icky
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:33 PM
1

Stop talking about incest
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 05:01 AM
1

It’s off-putting
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 05:01 AM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:57 AM
0

Meh. Bars are fine. I like deeper conversations than the rambling musings of the local drunk.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:57 AM
0

I agree that most of the men I’ve met have wanted to mine me for resources. It seems only fair to turn the tables.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:56 AM
2

Pretty much across the board, red pill men have said what you said and blue pill men have said “of course, I value women as friends and companions”. Why do you think it’s like that?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:55 AM
3

Is participating in your kinks a prerequisite for a relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 04:54 AM
1

I’m not an advocate of any specific way to live. I like having deep, meaningful relationships and live in my own house.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:51 AM
0

But at least you can earn a spot at the table
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:49 AM
1

Who says marriage bed anymore?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 03:48 AM
0

I have plenty of things besides sex I want from a relationship with a man but I certainly wouldn’t want a man living in my house. He can visit.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:50 AM
2

Not my concern. Shouldn’t be yours either. Has nothing to do with us
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:47 AM
2

And why is that a problem?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:24 AM
1

If you find it disgusting, don’t do it. It’s that easy
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:24 AM
2

You could open your legs and get dick any time you want too. It’s way too easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:23 AM
1

Sounds like something you would do
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:20 AM
-6

Did I say there was an issue?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:19 AM
2

This was an experience I had. I’m not sure it was related to the original post or just this conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:19 AM
0

Oh, I never would. Heavens no
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:18 AM
3

I don’t think anything is called that
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:18 AM
1

This is for entertainment purposes. You were absolutely talking about incest
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 02:17 AM
2

All the orgasms you want. No access to sex with a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:37 AM
1

So, you already live this reality?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:15 AM
-5

Correct
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:14 AM
1

It was so lovely. We were talking about a beautiful future together and I loved every minute of it. I stepped away from the relationship for a few months for my own reasons, but he is absolutely welcome to come back and resume all of it and he very well might, when the timing is right. I wouldn’t say no to sexual intimacy with him but the slow burn was better than any sex I’ve ever had. Especially when I taught him to dance. The sexual tension in the dance and music and all of it. Way better tha…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 01:13 AM
3

Then this feminist would never encourage you to be a slut.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:58 AM
2

Depends on the time frame
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:57 AM
3

I get it. Made me laugh
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:56 AM
3

I ‘become a problem’ by not adhering to any expectations placed on me that I don’t accept as part of my values.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:56 AM
2

I don’t know all the sects of feminism, but if someone tells me it limits women’s choice through social pressure, I know they don’t understand feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:55 AM
–

Do you believe women caused men to like pornography? Did women create purity culture? Are women responsible for the types of sex men you date like?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:54 AM
3

Are there collapsing standards? Women weren’t allowed to have standards before because they couldn’t choose. So what standards are you comparing to?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:52 AM
1

Whose purpose?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:51 AM
4

Become the problem
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:50 AM
4

You get next to nothing under the current system. Have you considered collecting a large dowry and some viable land, maybe a cow or two, and presenting to a woman’s family?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:50 AM
4

If something is truly empowering to women, a large percentage of men will be against it.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:48 AM
3

She could get herself pregnant. Would have nothing to do with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:46 AM
4

That is not necessarily a sign a woman likes you.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:45 AM
12

One of the groomsmen in my wedding experienced this very thing. Riding his mountain bike, he broke his neck and is a quadriplegic. Since then, he got his PhD in biochemistry (often sleeping at the lab), met and married his wife, and has three little daughters.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:45 AM
-3

At a certain age, sex becomes very low down on the list of what a partner gives me that my friends don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:43 AM
1

Thanks for that lol
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:42 AM
1

I mean, I assume people would just use science to make babies in this scenario.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:42 AM
2

My last short dating relationship had no sex and it was the best time I’ve ever had. We had two dates a week like clockwork, talked for hours, laughed until we cried, argued about politics a bit, explored small towns and local wineries, went dancing, ate at fancy restaurants, and sometimes kissed and held hands and I would sit in his lap by the hotel pool and just have a conversation. Amazing.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:41 AM
-2

So you only ever go on dates with the expectation of sex? Never just to meet someone new and have a conversation?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:37 AM
0

You know you don’t have to have sex to have a kid, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:37 AM
0

Thankfully, I already know that the men I want to hang around like me without any promise of sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:36 AM
-1

That wording was specific for this group because of how much men talk about their access to women when what they mean is their access to women’s bodies.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:35 AM
6

There are plenty of men who don’t want female friends if they can’t have sex with them
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:34 AM
3

Forever
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:32 AM
-1

That wording was specific for this subreddit because so many men here talking about access to women and who gets it and who doesn’t. It’s not really even relationship stuff, more just “can I get laid.”
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:32 AM
2

Science, I suppose
/r/PurplePillDebate10/08/26 12:31 AM
6

“… women… have no right…” Wrong in the first sentence.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 11:23 PM
15

His body. His choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:18 PM
1

If a family is in the financial position my was in, it would have been very fair for me to have been paid for the work I did at home but I’m finding more satisfaction in my actual career so I wouldn’t go back to that life again.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:11 PM
1

Eww. Gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:06 PM
1

The level of social posturing required to live at the “level” of the place I was living was insane. I had to maintain not only a McMansion and three kids but also put my husband through college (and write most of his papers), help him build a financial advisory company by throwing lavish dinner parties, networking, and making hand made truffles for every client every Christmas, being a PTA board member and volunteering several times a week at church, plus doing all the organic gardening and maki…
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 10:05 PM
1

It’s not the best deal either. Why would someone not take the best offer?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:59 PM
1

Something like that
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:57 PM
1

This is a post about one specific scenario.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:57 PM
1

If you think someone else’s boundary is not okay, you’re a predator.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:57 PM
1

Of course. I paid all the bills.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:56 PM
1

I have no idea. They’re a dime a dozen around me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:55 PM
1

I don’t know man, I was a stay at home mom and still wrote checks to the IRS
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:16 PM
1

It wasn’t terribly unpleasant but I decided she was going to be my last child.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:15 PM
1

One person has to do it. Does it matter which person? They need to not be sacrificing their whole future because the other person isn’t sacrificing their future.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:15 PM
1

They’re asking why you’re taking about incest. Please explain
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:14 PM
1

It’s not wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:13 PM
1

I am a huge fan of UBI but live in the US so know it’s never going to be an option.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:13 PM
1

That depends on the state. It’s not that hard to be in the top 1% where I live.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:11 PM
1

By the household money coming in.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:11 PM
3

My ex brother-in-law’s mother had an encounter with Ted Bundy in Tacoma Washington. It’s okay to get the ick and act on it!
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 09:10 PM
3

No such thing as weird boundary. All boundaries are valid
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:29 PM
1

The “unpaid labor” is funded. The loss of future earnings also needed to be funded.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:28 PM
1

I think the “give up the career” was the clue but I assumed people would know that many of us gave up a career against our will
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:32 PM
1

I don’t think I’m an outlier. I was a successful project manager working at a university and with the office of the governor. That’s the career trajectory I was on and went back to after the divorce. I think with the way women are getting educated these days, assuming she would have been making no money if she wasn’t a stay at home mom, is ridiculous.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:31 PM
1

Of course I’m assuming the partner was asked to stay home. Did you even read the post?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:12 PM
1

It’s not pretending. A judge will tell you the same. It’s the law.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:12 PM
1

If the partner was asked to stay home with the kids so the kids had a parent at home, where do you suggest that parent get their money?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:08 PM
2

I was not joking. I died during the birth and they had to give me something to restart my heart and shocked me (which I felt for days later) back to alive. Wasn’t expecting that.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:07 PM
1

According to the law in most states
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:07 PM
2

It wasn’t an option for some of us.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:06 PM
1

From the working partner
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:05 PM
0

Disagree.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:05 PM
1

I learned the hard way
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:05 PM
1

If they’re married, they both earned the money according to the law
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:04 PM
2

Not all marriages work.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:04 PM
1

Yes, women all have slightly different needs and desires. And, as women, we do talk about what security means to us. If a guy wants to know, he’s going to have to take some time to find out but there are basics every man can do without knowing specifics.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:04 PM
1

Thank you. I got better.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:02 PM
1

Split it 50/50.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:02 PM
15

I tell my daughters to leave at any sign of discomfort with a man. We sang a song with hand clapping when they were little “don’t be polite to men who creep you out.” The ick is a vital part of our safety so of course a male predator is going to villainize it.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 02:00 PM
3

The “ick” is just personal preference and men get it too. Trying to reframe how women are as something bad is old news, buddy. It’s been like that for a long time. Until you see women as human beings, you’re always going to give women the ick.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 01:57 PM
1

Because only one of the two is taking the loss.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:51 AM
2

You sound emotional.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:40 AM
0

I died giving birth to my last child. I’m pretty sure an insurance company would have paid me a lot more than that for dying on the job doing a job related activity. Were I being fairly compensated for my labor and the fact of dying.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:39 AM
2

I want affection, attention, and security in the way those make sense to me and work for me. It may be different for a woman who lists those things but means something slightly different. I agree security may mean something very different to me than another woman. For me, a man who makes me feel secure is going to be really reliable and consistent and doesn’t drain me of resources. For someone who doesn’t have their own money, security may just mean cash.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 05:38 AM
1

I mean, everyone should have a prenup. You can write one in an online program and get it made legal for very little money
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:57 AM
1

I think same. I do not belong here
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:57 AM
2

It would just be part of the prenup. Money automatically funneled.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:41 AM
3

I thought you went your own way? Why are you in a dating discussion?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:36 AM
1

Plenty of women are attracted to men who aren’t traditionally handsome. Minimum levels of attraction are required for romance before you can even get into the meat of what you want in a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:33 AM
3

This is exactly what I want in a partner, with the caveat that he must also be as attractive, fit, and financially secure as I am. But the last three aren’t what I want, they’re the basic requirements to get to the next phase.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:32 AM
1

Great advice for young women. Too late for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:23 AM
0

If they’re married, it’s the non-working person’s money as much as the working person. Whey are they getting “compensation” from the spouse? It’s their money.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:22 AM
1

You should only ever have separate finances. What are you talking about? Every modern woman needs her own money.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:21 AM
2

It’s the homemaker’s money too.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:20 AM
2

What does this have to do with the topic at hand?
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:20 AM
1

It’s their own money. Compensated by themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:19 AM
1

It’s their money in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:19 AM
2

Some people choose to stay home with their kids but don’t understand the full weight of that decision. If their partner is abusive, it’s almost impossible to get away without money.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:18 AM
1

This seems like very wise advice I wish I’d had when I was 19.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:17 AM
1

She is paying her own living expenses by “working” for her husband. She is not being compensated with their money more than he is in that arena. What she needs compensation for that isn’t in your equation is the years of missed raises and learning and competing in the job market. And I’m specifically talking about a person who is in a partnership and gives up their career to be a homemaker and raise kids.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/08/26 04:15 AM
2

If a modern person is considering this arrangement, they should have a strong prenup or postnup if the decision to stay home happens after they marry.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:51 PM
-1

I have higher standards than that.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:48 PM
-1

I was looking for myself on his list of women who have men pay for dates and didn’t find me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:48 PM
0

Yes. He just narrowed it to men trying to get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:44 PM
3

It’s a choice for most. Alimony is by jurisdiction. It’s a should situation, not a must.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:30 PM
1

The working partner needs to pay the non-working partner. I don’t pretend making money is easy. I work many hours a week to pay the bills.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:28 PM
2

That would be ideal.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:27 PM
1

When you can get it, for sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:26 PM
1

Yes. I work and pay the mortgage and do the landscaping and replaced the water heater and cook the meals and help with the homework. I would LOVE to have someone come do all the domestic chores for me that I have to do in between my two jobs and side hustle.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:26 PM
2

And he is also using. Was he going to not pay for water and electricity if he was single?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:11 PM
0

Not every state has alimony, kid. Spousal support varies by jurisdiction.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:11 PM
-1

Spoken like a person who has only ever done it in their imagination.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:10 PM
-1

I don’t understand the question. I am a single woman. Every dollar that comes into my house is made by me. I also don’t have a partner to grocery shop or take the kids to the choir practice. I do all of that too. Of course I’d like to make 5x the money I make now. Then I could pay someone to grocery shop for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:10 PM
-1

Sure. There are posts like that
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:08 PM
1

I cannot attest to the accuracy of that statement
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:05 PM
0

It would be a relief to only have to make money and not make money and do all the housework.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:02 PM
3

If you do it well, it’s far more than a full time job.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:02 PM
3

How does a man paying to live in a home with another person in it losing any more income than living in a house alone? He has to pay for a house either way.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:01 PM
9

The working partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:59 PM
1

How does having a job outside the home mean you can’t love your kids properly? That’s not compensation, that bare minimum for a parent/child relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:59 PM
2

Fair
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:56 PM
5

I have to both make all the money and run the whole household at my house. Just making money would be a relief.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:56 PM
1

I don’t live that life. I am a single woman with a good career. I do the job of two people. I used to live that life. I don’t recommend it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:55 PM
2

What does the worker lose? They are able to pretty much just pay bills and still have a fully functioning household. If that working partner was a single parent, they would be paying all the bills and doing all the housework and would likely have to pay someone to come in and carry some of that load for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:54 PM
5

I make all the money and do all the housework. Only having to do one of those things would be amazing.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:51 PM
1

The fact that it can’t always be accomplished doesn’t mean that it isn’t the right course of action. This is a “should” kind of situation. The partner working outside the home is only responsible for a portion of the household work when he wasn’t doing his career job. In theory, the partner at home can accomplish all the housework and other management during “working hours” 9-5, like the career partner, then they only have to do their share of the childcare after work hours.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:51 PM
-1

We don’t all have as much free will as we’d like to think. Yes, the military compensates you in several ways for doing that job, including pay and advancements.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:47 PM
3

I concede in the case of a person who wants to stay home and take the risk should not require compensation. If the partner giving up the career is doing it reluctantly for the betterment of the family, they need the compensation.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:15 PM
-5

Why isn’t this a good deal for them? They only have to make the money.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:13 PM
0

Sure, I’ll concede the point that, all things being equal, a guy with a strong social and professional network is going to come off as more appealing to women. Some of us are natural networkers. I’m a people person so I make new friends everywhere I go. I co-founded a social club for local ladies. I am part of the admin team for our dance community. I sail with friends. Everywhere I go in my town, I run into people I know. But, this is all easy for me because of my personality. If you hang aroun…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:12 PM
4

The fact that you keep using that word tells me a lot about you. You missed my point. The point is that you think your marriage is going to last but you honestly don’t know. No one does. It would be foolish to not project your imagination out into the future where the unthinkable happens and you’re left without a husband and a big gap in your resume. And to plan accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:07 PM
0

It’s not free. You’re doing a full time job running a household.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:05 PM
5

Compensated for a full time job managing a household with… checks notes… living expenses? A per diem? Would you take a full time job that only paid an allowance? I don’t know how often a woman with a master’s degree stays home but I was married to a financial advisor so we were both equally competent to provide the income for the household but I was better at doing mom stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:05 PM
1

And? She should not be compensated unless she was forced into it? No one should be forced into this.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:02 PM
2

Correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:01 PM
4

I don’t think anyone who makes a rational decision about their future financial situation in the event their partner changes or leaves is “retarded.” That’s just wisdom to know that you can’t predict every outcome.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:01 PM
0

What do you mean “100% whole”?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:58 PM
2

That isn’t compensation for the partner who gave up their career. That’s just the cost of having a household. Someone has to pay that no matter what. That doesn’t go directly to the person who doesn’t have a career. And it’s not true that’s they “don’t have to work.” They are still working full time as a homemaker, which has zero opportunities for advancement and doesn’t look good on a resume. In my case, I worked full time as a project manager while using my GI Bill to pay my grad school tuitio…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:58 PM
3

Why does the woman’s motivation to stay home matter if the outcome is the same: she is left at the end with no career or saved up money?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:51 PM
7

In another post, I had two young men tell me they never give up their seats to the elderly as a matter of principle. I was amazed. They felt it was not reciprocal. (One walked that back later when I told him I’d be embarrassed if my son didn’t give up his seat for an elderly person.)
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:33 PM
1

You’d think that if you didn’t have a true gentleman’s heart. I can pour into people without expecting anything in return because I get filled back up by the people who love me. Are people grateful? Often. Not always. Kids are never grateful but we don’t stop giving. There is no end to the chivalry I can show because it doesn’t cost me anything. I have everything I need. Obviously, don’t allow yourself to be in toxic relationships where you are harmed by your own giving, but that is a boundary i…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:30 PM
5

I am a woman and I still like to do “the gentleman thing”. It’s a matter of my own personal values about how I show up in the world. I don’t open doors or give up seats because the person is “deserving” of it. I do it because that’s how I am. When I ask a lady to dance, I understand the honor and responsibility of leading that experience so my partner is safe and has a nice time. I am a straight woman and these are not romantic partners but I still feel the weight of that privilege and feel hono…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:16 PM
8

The cringiest men I ever meet are the ones who “know a guy.” I am all in favor of good networking and often find myself handing out connections because I have wide and diverse social and professional connections. But that’s not what this is. You’re not adding value to anyone’s life by having an uncle whose buddy runs that club. You’re certainly not impressing anyone with knowing the band or the door guy. You’re just increasing your odds of being near hot women but using other people’s position a…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:59 PM
1

I am not saying anyone needs to do traditional gender roles. Keeping “the same energy” for women is just every human being responsible for themselves. How is that difficult?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:53 PM
1

That already makes it better than my dynamic.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:28 PM
1

Seems fair, I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:20 PM
1

Does she get enough money every month now to walk away from you at any point?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:12 PM
1

Why not give her the money now?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 04:08 PM
1

That was my beau’s preference as well and I was willing, but only with the proper financial compensation for the loss of my career in place. He agreed he would need to provide that so I wouldn’t be dependent on him if I didn’t want to be. We also discussed a strong prenup to protect us both. I would have been encouraged in that scenario to pursue my writing, competitive rowing, and dancing hobbies more fully. The problem is when the one partner not working means they have no power. Would you com…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:51 PM
1

True
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:46 PM
1

Which is why we can’t encourage women to put themselves fully into the hands of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:42 PM
1

Same
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:40 PM
1

Evil doesn’t exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:40 PM
1

That’s a fair point. There’s likely a big difference between choosing this dynamic versus being traumatized into it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:40 PM
1

Well, I have never had a healthy long term romantic relationship so it’s still theory for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:34 PM
1

People have never applied it well in the past. Women have been slaves in their own households since people started having houses. What makes you think people are going to start applying it well now, in this the year of our lord 2026?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:33 PM
1

That’s the theory.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:31 PM
1

Might be born of trauma. Might be born out of studying all of human history to this point.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:28 PM
1

To your point about trusting your partner. I agree it would have made a difference in my marriage if my husband had my interests or benefit in mind in any way. If he loved me and respected me as a person or wanted me to thrive and be happy, it might not have been so bad to be under his thumb. The last guy I dated preferred traditional gender roles in long term relationships. He had a lot of money and would have wanted me to be taken care of had we gotten to that level in our relationship. Even t…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:27 PM
1

I don’t think it is healthy for a woman to be in the power dynamic you suggest, ever. Full stop. Maybe it can be healthy for a man with your brain wiring. I’m not convinced.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:22 PM
1

It’s because religion isn’t meant to make people better people. It’s meant to make people behave in a way that benefits the people in power. I can’t argue with living the life you want to live. I don’t really appreciate people pushing the notion that a D/s is a normal and healthy way for most people to live.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:16 PM
1

Gotcha. Yet you were on here saying you know better than I do (a person with a fully working emotional and interpersonal landscape) how men respect or don’t respect their partners. Clearly that was a lie. I’m even more qualified to understand this than you are given your limitations.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:11 PM
1

I meant the religious fanatics thrive on this power dynamic and love when red pill men espouse it in mainstream culture. Religions like mine can only abuse women and girls because society allows it and people like you encourage it. Every secular red pill trad wife whatever (male and female proponents alike) pushing this agenda just gives more authority to the religious nuts.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:08 PM
1

I can’t real your whole flair. What is it?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:05 PM
1

They love your marriage power dynamic. Thrive on it. But don’t tell me I don’t know.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:01 PM
1

Being willing to change yourself to suit my tastes makes it impossible for me to respect you. I would be very concerned if one of my children was behaving that way. It would mean some sort of pathology or mental illness or they’d been horribly traumatized. If one of my kids wanted me or anyone to shape their personality, I would intervene because that’s not a healthy mindset.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:01 PM
1

Most people my age are divorced. We talk. But, also, I come from a religious community where this type of marriage is very common. I’ve been and known countless “trad-wives” (but the real kind, not the instagram kind) and was part of this community for 30 years. Women like me who were pushed into marriage as children and then told to submit or face the consequences of eternal damnation live the life you’re suggesting and I can assure you it does not go well for the women involved. You think you …
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:47 PM
1

That sounds like the worst possible partner in the world. I’m exhausted just thinking about being around you. You will never challenge my thinking or teach me something new. You will never delight me with an adventure you took because you’d be dependent on me for your whole personality. You’ll never come home with an accomplishment you can be proud of and I can too. You’ll never surprise me. What you’re offering sounds like more work than just doing the job and the household work myself. To be r…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:43 PM
1

Agree to disagree. You think you know how you would gain respect in that situation but you don’t actually know. You’re guessing. I know from real life experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:34 PM
1

I asked what you bring and you’re telling me I have to define that? You don’t know your own charms?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:30 PM
1

My experience is lived and yours is hypothetical. I have at least one point on you. I am considerably more likely to be right than you are due to at least that data. You have none.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:29 PM
1

So, you also want me to do the labor of telling you exactly how to be a great partner to me? Already not worth it. If you don’t know what worth you have and why I should want it, then how would I know?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:26 PM
1

I am not assuming any of this. I lived it first hand. You are the one who knows nothing about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:24 PM
1

Okay then. I am a fairly financially successful woman and I need a servant around the house. What would you bring to the relationship to make it worth me paying to have a man I can’t respect around the house?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:12 PM
1

If a woman goes into a man’s home as a wife and submits herself fully to his authority, he will grow to loathe her. It is an unnatural and unhappy way to live and a man won’t respect a woman who doesn’t think for herself or have her independence. He will view her as less than and unequal and like a child. He won’t consider her an equal partner and will imagine he is smarter than she is. Eventually, he realizes he really does get to do whatever he wants with her without limit and he gets disguste…
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:10 PM
2

It’s not how you think. You already said you wouldn’t take this deal if a man offered it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:01 PM
2

Working makes everyone unhappy. That’s how life works. If a woman were to think like you, she would for sure get cheated on by her partner and become a sex slave in her own home. Men don’t respect women who depend on them like that. They know the woman is captive so they always cheat and eventually push her to the side for whatever new female he wants to mine resources from. If you make yourself disposable, you get rejected eventually.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:00 PM
2

Well, abusers don’t tell you they’re abusers before you marry them. Not sure if you knew that. They tend to hide it. Again, this is all just a male fantasy of how women should think. It’s really gross.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:55 PM
1

Well, not everyone gets that choice. If you put your life in the hands of a man, you will 100% be unhappy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:52 PM
1

It sounds like you’re just kind of lazy to be honest. I’ve never met a woman who said she would take the gilded cage and abuse because women generally work harder than that. And also, you’re not telling the truth. You don’t currently put up with abuse in your relationships so you wouldn’t tolerate it even if someone else paid the bills. If you truly are willing to be abused just to get your bills paid, there are already men who will do that for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:49 PM
1

What if it was an arranged marriage and you didn’t have a choice?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:46 PM
5

Some women have that option but the vast majority of women work.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:39 PM
4

Even if your partner was constantly cheating on you and you had to get STI testing every month because they refused to use protection? How much abuse would you endure to have your bills paid?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:39 PM
2

Having a job and dealing with the marketplace is a human thing, not a man thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:36 PM
6

I’ve been a bird in a gilded cage. It’s not great. I’d much rather work two jobs to pay my own bills than depend on a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:35 PM
–

We do what we want.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:29 PM
3

I don’t believe you. You are imagining a woman who wants to be in a power imbalance in your favor. You wouldn’t accept the opposite.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:29 PM
5

Love comes and goes. A paycheck comes with a contract that is legally enforceable. Not to mention the fact that lack of personal income means you can’t leave the relationship. Are you wanting to be held captive? What if your love turns into a monster?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:21 PM
4

Why would you want to be dependent on your partner? Is that only if you were a woman or as a man too?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 12:57 PM
10

Because you don’t get view women as humans but rather as a resource to be mined, you will not find connection nor love.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 07:06 AM
2

Explain
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 06:38 AM
7

Are these women in the room with us?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 05:17 AM
3

Survival skills! Sorry that was a necessity
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:11 AM
10

He’s also delusional about what he offers a partner. In the same comment he’s talking about making donuts and waffles and also an incest thing? I don’t know. Deeply disturbed, likely.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:05 AM
2

My son is actually a really good cook and is old enough to handle it now. For a while, it was bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 03:03 AM
12

What in the chicken fried fuck are you talking about now? You created her? Incest fetish? What is wrong with people?!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 02:45 AM
9

No one is blown away by a person mixing some eggs and oil together in the blender. Literally anyone can do that. And pastries are not for breakfast every day unless you want to be obese. This is all fantasy.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:56 AM
8

For the most part, households require two working adults unless one of them is rich.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:55 AM
7

After the divorce, I once dropped my kids off at their dad’s house after a school event and found out they’d been home with just their teenaged stepbrother for five days eating ramen and frozen pizza.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:53 AM
6

Not if they post it once. If they post it three times a week, there a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:52 AM
1

I am for sure not the mother of your children. What in the world are you talking about? Incomprehensible.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 01:51 AM
29

OP is obsessed with normalizing his desire to become a stay at home dad. The sad part is that he’s already allowed to do that even though it’s not that common, but also not vilified. He doesn’t realize he can choose whichever kind of family and lifestyle he wants even if no one else agrees with it. His time would likely be better spent just living that life rather than trying to change society’s acceptance of it on Reddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 12:59 AM
12

Wanting to have sex with me: fine Telling me you want to have sex with me: gross If I want to have sex with you, you’ll know. You won’t have to tell me anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 12:56 AM
1

Everyone finds competence attractive. It doesn’t matter the gender. I can assure you my single female friends have clean showers right now in their homes and that is not true of all my male friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/08/26 12:49 AM
1

I have made my point and you have raised no new ones. There is nothing to debate.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 10:43 PM
0

I consider this shift just the idea of men becoming independent in the same way women are: being able to maintain a household and career without relying on the labor of someone else. I do think it would benefit men to learn some skills that have traditionally been considered more feminine in order to become fully independent in their own lives and to become better partners if they choose to have a partner. It’s not getting more feminine- it’s getting more competent.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 09:39 PM
–

Thank you
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 05:58 PM
-3

Your version of “feminism” is just you wanting permission to be a bad person. Sure, you can use feminism to justify acting like a jerk, but that doesn’t mean it’s feminism.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 04:21 PM
1

Please cite your source.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 02:41 PM
1

Okay, think that then. But still stop telling everyone what to do. I think teaching kids about god is child abuse. I’m not yelling about it. It’s not my kid.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 02:40 PM
1

Women always do more in every relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 02:40 PM
1

You tell her. I don’t even know her.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 01:54 PM
1

Who cares about “should”? Let people live their own lives.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 01:54 PM
1

I’m still trying to understand your statistic, honestly. I guess we both don’t know what the other is talking about
/r/PurplePillDebate07/08/26 01:48 PM
1

I am a dancer. Dancing is open to every kind of person. I don’t discriminate on who wants to experience live music and connection in a shared space. Even my closest family members are religious and we don’t agree on politics but I would never give up my own family over something happening in government. That’s for the weak.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 07:49 PM
2

I wanted zero kids. He wanted four. We had three. I know you are trolling but it’s sad how little empathy men have anymore. I know you’d do the same as he did. Knock up his Christian wife and go have sex with sex workers. That’s because both he and you view women as resources to be mined. Never mind the fact that kids are worth a thousand useless husbands. A husband can deal with his own problems. Children are vulnerable and need their mom. The dad can get over it. Kids always come first.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 06:39 PM
1

I’m not the one out here telling people how to live
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:55 PM
1

I understand that view as I live here but my world and my community are extremely diverse in our ethnicities, politics, orientations and genders. I take queer dance lessons on Mondays at the local honky tonk. I also get invited to church with regularity. My MAGA and woke friends can sit down at my table and find common ground because hospitality is sacred here. It is the perception of the foolish to imagine every person in a whole geographic area is worthy of dismissal because you have a YouTube…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:26 PM
1

Correct. You should avoid me at all cost.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:21 PM
3

“Feminism shouldn’t give women the choice…” Well, it does. Time to move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:21 PM
2

You might be fine at English but your idea that women are all one way is holding back your growth as a human.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 03:57 PM
5

Stop saying “women are…”. Just stop that mindset. You will never be happy if you blame women for your problems. Full stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 03:53 PM
3

He was raised by his grandparents in a humble trailer park in the Midwest. He still celebrates Christmas with them every year in the retirement home they live in and he pays for. He isn’t over invested in his image. He has a thriving business and knows how to take care of himself and others. One of my truest loves and friends is the same. He came here from Russia with no English and owns a company that brings in $30M a year and he often sends me photos of some midcentury vintage find at a flea m…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 03:51 PM
–

That’s a big one on my checklist. Eliminate early and often.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 01:52 PM
7

Yes. Women are already allowed to eat or not eat what we want and that will continue. If you are so concerned about freedom, you need to give up your own ability to choose.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 12:29 PM
3

We have laws.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 12:28 PM
8

This idea of “one to build with” is a cop out. My ex husband built a thriving business on the foundation of my labor. I am a fully independent woman. I will only ever date a fully independent man. I’m not going to build his life with him. He needs to have already built a whole life. We can combine our lives but the building is already done.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:30 AM
4

You seem to be saying you feel your only purpose in life is to work and that makes you feel directionless and lost. I am not sure why you’re only looking for compassion from women because of this but I do feel empathy for you. I have kids and a beautiful life and I sometimes feel like all I do is grind away for a paycheck just to pay the bills. I would blame the powers of capitalism for grinding us to a paste but you can’t blame women for your lack of purpose. There is a solution to the male lon…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 05:28 AM
8

Women having choices isn’t a good thing because women are inherently good. Women having choices is a good thing (and the only acceptable thing) because women are human beings and have complete autonomy over their own selves. Anything less than having all the freedom of choice, is bad. Some people will use their choice to do some bad things. The vast majority of women will use that choice to make good lives for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:34 AM
1

Women having choices isn’t a good thing because women are good. Women having choices is a good thing (and the only acceptable thing) because women are human beings and have complete autonomy over their own selves. Anything less than having all the freedom of choice, is bad. Some people will use their choice to do some bad things. The vast majority of women will use that choice to make good lives for themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:32 AM
30

“Here’s a list of the most atrocious uses of free will by men. On to my real point… we should probably take free will away from women, right, guys? Feminism, amiright?” edited to add word
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 04:30 AM
–

Meh. A man my age will have had relationships and partners and probably kids and a divorce. I honestly don’t care who he was intimate with before me. It’s his body and he gets to choose what he does with it. If he chooses to share it with me, I would feel honored because that is an intimate and vulnerable thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 02:46 AM
–

That’s just, like, your opinion, man.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 02:38 AM
2

I don’t believe you. Your mom didn’t even raise you to have basic human decency.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/08/26 12:33 AM
2

That proves my point. Y’all are selfish, impolite, lazy males and that’s why you don’t attract women.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 11:08 PM
2

I’d ask the patriarchy the same thing. What’s good for the gander is good for the goose. If I saw men promoting feminism en masse, I’d be more inclined to fight for the equality of men. As it is, women are on our own in the battle and I don’t have time to fight mine and fight yours. Sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 11:07 PM
0

Another reason I didn’t want to be intimate with my ex husband. He didn’t care one bit that his circumcision damage was incredibly painful for me during sex. But, Jesus says you have to do it anyway even if it isn’t fun or pleasurable.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 10:05 PM
6

I am a former “submissive wife” and only denied my husband access to my body when I had just given birth or was struggling with small children around. I was pregnant or breastfeeding for a solid decade and I was as tired as a human can be and not die. Of course he went to sex workers.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 10:03 PM
1

That’s true. Every person I rule out is a step closer to the goal, in theory.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 08:48 PM
–

That is a just a toxically positive distortion of the fact that most men aren’t fully independent and can’t become successful without the unpaid labor of women. This is not an elevation of women to be the real force behind a successful man but a tragic truth that needs to change. Men need to become fully independent as women are becoming. That supposed “truth” is a just a candy coating of the horrors of domestic servitude women have endured.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 08:09 PM
1

Yes. I need someone who is okay with all my systems.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 07:52 PM
–

Join the conversation or not. I don’t care either way but I’m not going to respond thoughtfully to bullshit.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 07:38 PM
–

They never have in the past. Why start now?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 07:12 PM
–

He’s just trolling too. Talking about sex workers and shit like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 07:09 PM
–

That’s not at all the correct conclusion and you know it because you’re trolling.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 07:09 PM
–

A threat is literally a messenger problem. Especially when the threat is a lie from a moron like you lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:57 PM
–

OP has typed a threat under every comment
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:56 PM
–

You are a man who has to pay for sex. Why are you complaining? Just pay and shut up about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:54 PM
–

Another threat.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:53 PM
–

Straw man. You’ve reformulated the argument to purposefully distort my position. I mean, it’s cheap and easy, I guess. Let me know if you want to have an intellectually honest discussion.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:50 PM
–

Fair.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:47 PM
–

To the OP’s point about his personal lack of access to sex slaves, I’m going to hold with my stance that the world is just fine the way it is. To your point about the world not being fine for anyone, I also agree. To address that would require lengthy points about the patriarchy and democracy and capitalism and the like. Beyond the scope for OP but I will cede your point.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:37 PM
–

Can attest to the number of friends I have with janky ass baby daddies
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:35 PM
6

Maybe because I am autistic but I absolutely cannot connect with a person who is being inauthentic. Despite being in a finance world for more than a decade, I have no friends from that group of people because they are so closed off and inauthentic. Meanwhile, I have a dozen intimate heart friends in my dance community that are the realest people I know and let me hold their troubles with them. The people who are just themselves and communicate directly are the ones I can build a connection with.
/r/ExRedPill05/08/26 06:33 PM
–

What does that even mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:30 PM
–

Okay, stop letting us then. Again with the threats. No one cares about your mewling
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:30 PM
–

I guess men should think about that and do something about it. The world seems fine for men to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:29 PM
–

Consequences are great for me, bro. I have my own money and a fun job and I still get rich men who want to pay for everything coming around to give me attention. Why would I want to change any of that?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:25 PM
–

Giving you an upvote for making me laugh so hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:24 PM
–

Ha! You’re threatening me with your unhinged fantasies to try to make me help you make feminism better for you? Hahahahaha!!!! Does that ever work? Omg. I’m crying.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:22 PM
–

They really are just saying it out loud. Feminism isn’t working for me, ladies so what’s your brilliant solution to this problem? Sir, I see no problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:21 PM
–

Or we can just be feminists and do whatever we want and let the men figure it out for themselves because that’s not our problem. I think this is a disturbingly gross interpretation of feminism but if you want to think that’s what it is, I’m okay with that. It’s not the job of women to make men’s lives better. You need to do that all on your own.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 06:15 PM
3

Why does it matter what exactly his company does?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 05:11 PM
3

He started and owns his own software consulting company and just bought his second Porsche so you tell me how much he works. He once invited me to go to dinner in Paris for just a day trip because he flies in, has his morning meeting, goes out to dinner, and flies home the next day. He works a ton but I have no idea how many hours.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 05:10 PM
1

If y’all are that kind of friends, sure.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:46 PM
5

I am also autistic and a bit older than you are but I understand the piling on thing. I’m already feeling with diabetes and a thyroid condition and last year my kids moved away and I just stopped eating for six months and lost 20% of my body weight due to grief. I also had a massive knee injury that put my dance business on the back burner for 8-12 months and I don’t have medical insurance. It gets rough and then it gets better and it seems to do that over and over again. I have been on and off …
/r/ExRedPill05/08/26 04:46 PM
16

Your therapist said you weren’t making progress. I’m betting that’s a problem in your dating life.
/r/ExRedPill05/08/26 04:29 PM
2

Fair point lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 04:00 PM
2

Yes. I have never had a man pretend to be my friend so he could ambush me later with “I wanted to have sex with you this whole time and now I’m just now telling you.” I could smell that from a mile away. I actually do have friends I would consider being intimate with and we both know it and choose not to at this time but know it’s an option if we want. When I go on a first date with a man, we set our expectations right up front so everyone knows the deal. And I have a few friends who might have …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:13 PM
2

I grew up with guns and have a sharpshooter ribbon from the Navy. But I’m not sure I want to go to a convention that encourages people to be armed lol
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:09 PM
2

Well, don’t pretend to be her friend. Make it known on day one that you’re there to get sex. Always be honest about your intentions.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 02:07 PM
1

Oh dear
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 02:06 PM
3

He works a lot. Has for years. Still finds time to take me out to drinks and chat. He’s a good guy. Someone who is there for his friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 02:06 PM
1

If you are spending time around a woman with the intention of eventually asking for sex from her then you are not a friend. You are a lurker who pretends to be a friend. If she was truly your friend and you respected her, you would never ask her for sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 01:43 PM
3

He runs his own company. He finds the time to decorate his house. He’s fully independent.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 01:18 PM
2

Are you joking?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 01:17 PM
2

A friendship may develop into a relationship but generally not. If you are being a “friend first” until she starts to like you, you are not being a friend. You are just being a patient thirsty person. Don’t be friends with women with the intention of dating them. Be friends with them because they are amazing friends
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 12:52 PM
6

I only connect to men who are open and vulnerable and effusive with their affection and affirmation. My girlfriends are like this and we have very close relationships. I am not into cold and distant men who play games or follow some pill philosophy. I’m looking for an authentic human being who shows up and is fully himself.
/r/ExRedPill05/08/26 12:40 PM
1

They are ALL the things that cause attraction: friendship, chemistry, looks, similar values, pheromones, style, career, personality, humor. That’s where attraction comes from.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 12:35 PM
2

I have a friend who built a custom house with city views and it probably cost $3M on top of the $1.5M lot. I can assure you, he takes adding art, wine, and guitars to his decor very seriously. He is a fully independent man who cooks for guests and throws lavish dinner parties. His house isn’t full of bullshit but it is comfortable and looks like a magazine. You don’t have to up your standards and become like him- fully independent as a man, but I can assure you this is the standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 12:24 PM
1

What’s a blinky?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 12:19 PM
7

Sounds like a recipe for the worst marriage in history. Only childless people would think like this.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:12 AM
4

You can meet my ex husband.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:09 AM
6

It is never good for kids to live in a household where they see their dad be lazy while their mom works. The majority of households in America are not nuclear with a mom and dad and kids. That’s just not how family works anymore. It’s not even the normal much less the preferred.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 03:08 AM
1

It doesn’t matter which it is. Either one is entirely of his own making. He should not feel entitled because he is not in fact, entitled. At any point in his life with any woman ever.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/08/26 02:06 AM
2

It can be changed but why would I change what benefits me?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 11:41 PM
2

Was just curious if that was an easy yes for you. My mama raised me different.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 11:40 PM
2

Yes, child. That is how the world works. I’m sorry to be the one to tell you. Some people have privilege and get things that other people don’t get. It’s not fair at all. But it is a thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 10:04 PM
1

Would you give up your seat to an elderly person?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 10:02 PM
1

Just so you know, I don’t FEEL entitled to my date paying for me. I AM entitled to my date paying for me by nature of my age and place in life. It’s called privilege.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 09:58 PM
1

He said so himself. He doesn’t want to open doors or give up seats or give compliments. When I asked him if he would give up his seat for an old person he said he does not do that and will never do that. Then he backtracked and said he actually would. These are all things I would do for anyone. He won’t even give up his seat for an elderly woman because he’s lazy and selfish.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 09:57 PM
1

I didn’t say poor people are lazy. I said OP is lazy. Did you read his post? He wants a shortcut to everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 09:32 PM
1

I do a lot of things to try to avoid unpleasantness. Even more than I do to prevent assault
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:59 PM
1

They can literally do anything they want. They may not find this exact thing to complain about but it doesn’t mean you haven’t displeased them in some way. Why even bother?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:41 PM
0

The post is about one thing and one thing only: paying for your own meal doesn’t stop entitlement. If you want to talk about a different topic, start your own post.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:16 PM
1

It’s not an evil thing but you clearly have an agenda so why can’t she?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:15 PM
0

I didn’t talk about the second point. I made the point about entitlement and no other point.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:03 PM
1

Yet still it does not. They may still feel entitled.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:03 PM
1

So you don’t even care if they pay, you just want to get laid and will use that criteria to decide if you want more than sex? So you don’t respect any of them?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:02 PM
1

Yes. Everyone gets to choose their own feelings.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 08:01 PM
1

“Destroy my chance at getting laid”. So you’re there for the sex and still expect her to offer to pay? Is it the ones you respect or the ones you don’t respect that you bang after?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:22 PM
1

Feelings are something that happens inside your head. You get to choose to feel entitled or not. That is your choice based on whatever factors you decide but that has nothing to do with me or my actions. It is 100% your choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:21 PM
1

“Removes the opportunity” how?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 07:19 PM
1

If [insert anything a woman may or may not do] ≠> then a man won’t feel entitled A man feeling entitled is in no related to what a woman does or doesn’t do. If there were no women in the whole world, men would still feel entitled. If a man feels entitled it is because he is believing he deserves a thing that isn’t his. This can happen in a vacuum. No woman required. Men will feel entitled or not based entirely on their own self and not on what I do or don’t do. That’s just an excuse for poor emo…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:36 PM
1

I have been in several relationships. Why do you need to know this information so badly? What if there isn’t some magic key to unlock the secret of attraction?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:29 PM
1

Of course I have plenty of friends who are kind to me that I’m not attracted to but you seemed to indicate that no one is attracted to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:24 PM
15

You’re just out of high school and don’t get the attention you use to get and you’re broke. You think muscles are the answer? How about going to college?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:10 PM
3

It’s not one thing. It’s not the same for all women. If you think you’re being kind and people still aren’t attracted to you, you’re lying to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:09 PM
5

“I have chosen to focus in on one facet of my humanity and deem that the most valuable and it’s how manly I am and now women aren’t throwing themselves at me so what’s wrong with them?” No. Women don’t across the board all like one thing. If a skinny dude is getting more attention than you are, that means nothing about women in general. Women, for the most part, are looking for someone to be kind to them. Start there.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 04:57 PM
1

I guess I was just raised to be chivalrous and I don’t see any reason not to. I am a dancer who leads and follows. I feel very honored when I ask a woman to dance and she accepts. I feel a large sense of responsibility for her safety and enjoyment of the dance. I view her as the main event and my whole purpose in that dance is to showcase her grace and beauty. I want her to be celebrated in that moment and have a really fun time. At no point am I thinking “what can this woman do for me?” At no p…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:51 PM
2

Show me the logic.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:33 PM
1

I did take it as the former.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 03:33 PM
2

And other things
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 02:11 PM
2

Seems obvious to me but lacking self awareness completely
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 02:11 PM
1

One of us here is happy and it ain’t you. Take my advice or leave it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 02:08 PM
2

But dating is a social thing. Biology is only a tiny part of it
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 02:07 PM
1

Which was a good point? Is it in the room with us.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 02:06 PM
6

My problem isn’t with you being poor. My problem is that, instead of being content with your place in life, you lash out at people like me who have it better than you do. You pretend we are shallow because we are comfortable. You are actively seeking to destroy the way my people date because you don’t have access to it instead of just acknowledging that you don’t have access to it. It’s comforting to you to pretend the people who have it better than you do are less than. If you were comfortable …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:59 PM
1

You are a liar. You said you don’t do it and never have. And your mom didn’t raise you to do it. You have no respect for elderly people because you are entitled. The same bullshit reason you won’t give up your seat for a pregnant woman is the same reason you won’t give up your seat for an old person- you are selfish and mean. You only care about your own comfort. Your mom never raised you to think about other people. Disgusting. If you were my son I’d be ashamed
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:54 PM
1

You are a fucking moron for taking the conversation somewhere like that. Absolute turnip. You’ve lost the point
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:51 PM
2

They tell on themselves
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:50 PM
3

I hate a post-truth society
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:49 PM
1

As a former English teacher, I can assure you the letter written between husband and wives during wars are very real and very much worth reading.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:48 PM
2

That is both a false equivalence and just a really stupid take. Jeezuz. You’re suggesting: A. Women not paying for their own dates is similar oppression to being under the Taliban B. It is somehow the responsibility of women in Iran to rise up against their oppressors C. I should similarly rise up against the dating culture in my area You’re a fucking moron.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:47 PM
1

Your reality isn’t all reality. You’re a kid.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:36 PM
4

You imagine that because it makes you feel better about yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:36 PM
2

You said “I don’t do it as a rule”
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:35 PM
0

That’s a pretty gross take on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:01 PM
1

Well, go read some old timey love letters. This is the only way to have a satisfying relationship is by getting to know someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 01:00 PM
5

I know you’re poor. The men I date have so much money it means nothing to them. Because you are lazy and don’t make money, it matters a lot to you so you’re out here trying to lower everyone’s standards so you don’t seem so lame. This is so obvious lol
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:59 PM
2

Weird. My culture teaches respect towards the first elderly. I think you are actually the one raised to feel entitled. My son wouldn’t dream of not giving up his seat to an elderly person. He would go out of his way to show respect. I’m guessing you weren’t taught respect toward women either. Your parents failed you.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:58 PM
1

Tragic.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:56 PM
2

In the first few conversations I have with any date, he’s going to tell me he’s done well for himself and is generous. They start the conversation about how the dynamic is going to go long before anyone pays for a dinner. Because the men I date know that everything is smoother when we follow the dating “rules” of our culture, socioeconomic status, and age. At my age, men have enough money to live off for their rest of their lives without working so it means nothing to them to dig into that bank …
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:56 PM
8

You won’t know until you become a millionaire. The men I date don’t complain about it. That’s how I know you’re poor.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:53 PM
3

So, your mom didn’t make you do it when you were young?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:52 PM
2

The broke and lazy men are just trying to reframe the discussion so they don’t have to do any work. I’ve done every single ounce of work for a man I’m ever going to do. The men who want to be with know that. They spoil me by choice and on purpose to send me a message: you are valued here.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:46 PM
1

Your language and attitude is that of a child. You did this to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:44 PM
3

So, you do give up your seat to an elderly person. Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:41 PM
0

I am 49 and you are a child. (Edit to correct)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:41 PM
3

The only men who are mad about this dynamic are broke men. Get some money and see how your perspective changes.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:40 PM
0

Even if you don’t like it, that is the expectation in our areas.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:38 PM
1

I too am from an area where it is culturally normal for men to treat women with chivalry and the incels are super mad about it. Most of the men in my area would be horrified to imagine a woman opening her own door on a date or paying for herself.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:38 PM
4

Does your behavior towards a woman change based on her age? Like, it is entitlement to give up your seat for a 25 year old woman but something else if you give up your seat to a 85 year old woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:36 PM
7

These kids are unhinged. But what about the sexual desire in my eyes?! Bleh
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:34 PM
7

That is literally every man all the time who cares?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:33 PM
1

When I break things off with a guy, I cut off all contact for about six months so there aren’t any awkward feelings. That time away from each other lets the emotions and passion die a natural death without complications. If, after that time, we have decided a friendship will work and is desired, we do that. Here’s the thing about a man’s attraction- it is never something to make decisions based upon. If you need to dump a guy, it doesn’t matter that he’s still thirsty.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:32 PM
1

Unfairness doesn’t matter in this case. It’s about entitlement
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:20 PM
0

That didn’t answer my question. What did that add to your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:19 PM
0

Don’t do that.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:18 PM
1

Then you’ve never read any literature or poetry. The fact that you don’t know this is how it works is ignorance
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:18 PM
-1

Well, you’d have to know that women aren’t girls, “smashed” isn’t a thing, and you aren’t a man:
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:17 PM
2

Control yourself
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:16 PM
2

I am just not as convinced that everything is already set in stone by biology. That’s a child’s thinking
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:15 PM
0

I am only talking about the entitlement.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 12:14 PM
1

Moronic
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:25 AM
0

Maybe we evolved that way for a reason. Maybe you were never meant to have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:25 AM
0

The comments on this post (and most of the posts in this group) made by males give me a very clear picture of young people who want a quick fix for everything. Y’all have grown up with immediate gratification at every turn. Born with smartphones in your hands, you’ve never been bored or had to wait for something. Need to lose weight but don’t want to diet? Ozempic. Want big muscles but don’t want to work out every day? Peptides. Want to make money but not actually build or create anything? Day t…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:17 AM
1

Who told you this? That you can be a “full package” and not have an amazing personality?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:06 AM
-2

Tell me you’ve never dated anyone without telling me you’ve never dated anyone. Literally, getting to know someone over months and years is how every single person used to meet and date and fall in love. For ALL of human history. Now you’ve listened to some podcaster who’s told you that’s unreasonable.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:03 AM
0

I can barely comprehend what I’m reading. This male thinks a normal scenario of how people meet is fantasy. I’ve been away from Reddit for a while but did not know how delusional these males had become. Good on you for saying just normal human things.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 06:00 AM
-2

Truly curious. Why the insult at the end of your point?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:58 AM
3

Sounds like you already know everything. “Until death, every defeat is psychological.”
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:56 AM
1

I don’t watch YouTube. I’m grown
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:54 AM
1

Okay man.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:43 AM
1

And? How does that relate to the point?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:42 AM
1

I think those are all great reasons to pay for yourself. Because none of them is “to placate a manchild”. I choose not to pay for myself for a lot of reasons as well but I think every woman should do what makes her comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:42 AM
2

Excuses
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:40 AM
1

It’s not my job to manage men’s emotions or guess which excuse they’ll use to be wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:39 AM
3

Are you a slave to your passions?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/08/26 05:39 AM
0

Correct. They are not entitled to sex ever for any reason. Some men feel entitled to things they are not. Let’s not keep playing that game.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:46 PM
2

Paying would not have prevented that entitlement nor likely the assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:46 PM
1

I don’t think paying prevents entitlement the same way avoiding dark alleys prevents robbery.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:43 PM
1

One person agrees with me!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:42 PM
2

I don’t believe a man can’t live like a woman. More excuses
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 11:40 PM
1

You won’t get it until you’re my age. My friends and family love me exactly the way I am. They want me to do always exactly what I want because they know that is the healthiest thing. They don’t view me as selfish or entitled because I’m not. When I do exactly as I please, it helps build strong relationships with the people who only want the best for me and I want the best for them. I don’t do what anyone tells me to do anymore. I don’t care what you think that makes me. I my age, very few women…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 08:50 PM
1

I don’t understand why at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 08:46 PM
1

We do.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 05:15 PM
0

That’s not fully independent. That’s man who still needs a woman to fix up his house for him.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 05:02 PM
1

I think it is harmful to believe things that aren’t true just by the fact of them not being true.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 05:02 PM
1

I am waiting.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:35 PM
7

Decentering dating is what made this life good in the first place. No one can guarantee you a partner. You can use whatever method you want to try to accomplish that goal of finding love. I guess it works for me to just go without.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:35 PM
1

I think it is fair to wait for an answer to my question before I answer yours. I can only assume you don’t know how conversations work if I have to explain that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:32 PM
1

That’s not why I’m not paying for my food.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:31 PM
6

I would also be happier with a partner but that isn’t what I have. So I figure out how to be happy without one.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:29 PM
1

I don’t believe you. I think you think it has. You have not provided evidence beyond your personal experience.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:27 PM
3

I don’t believe you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:26 PM
1

This was my question you failed to answer: Are you suggesting I caused these feelings of entitlement?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:26 PM
1

I don’t believe paying for a meal helps any woman avoid abuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:25 PM
1

By nature of my age (49), most of the men I go on dates with are very wealthy. I don’t expect them to pay but most would be offended if I offered. They would think I thought they weren’t a gentleman or weren’t “raised right.” It’s different with the young folks. They’re looking for an equal partner to build a life with. I already have a life built.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:24 PM
2

Sounds reasonable for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:22 PM
6

There is but the path is full of being uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:22 PM
1

I always drive my own car. I believe you believe paying for your own food helps in your safety and that is enough reason to do it. I don’t believe it helps. In fact, research has shown that women who ‘become a problem’ earlier are less likely to have a man follow through with abuse if she comes out “swinging” at the beginning. If I get an inkling that a man on a date has a chance of becoming aggressive, I’m going to become aggressive first. I don’t believe in being polite to men who creep me out…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:18 PM
1

The vast majority of the men I’ve been out with would be horrified if I thought they thought they were entitled to sex. They are kind, respectful men who appreciate women and that’s why I’m on a date with them. But, there are some occasions where a man throws a fit because I decline a second date or decline an invitation to intimacy. Me paying for the date would in no way change the way these men felt or acted towards me. So there is no reason for me to try.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:08 PM
-3

Because you’re not fully independent men who can function on your own without a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:04 PM
1

I can see how you would feel that way. I still disagree with the premise that paying helps so I’m going to stand on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 04:04 PM
1

I think you must do what is right for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:55 PM
7

False equivalence is a logical fallacy in which two things are treated as if they are equal or morally, logically, or practically comparable when the differences between them are significant enough that the comparison is misleading. Since you want to pull definitions out. The bar to entry to living like a rich person is very high. Almost no one can do this. The bar to entry to living like a woman is zero. Literally everyone could do this.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:54 PM
1

You saying it doesn’t make it true. Prove it with facts from a reputable source.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:48 PM
1

I agree “to mitigate assault we need to be proactive”. I don’t agree that paying for your own dinner on a date is a way to be proactive in preventing assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:47 PM
1

I’m sure you’re exactly the man to set us all straight. What a hero.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:46 PM
1

Is a man fully independent if he can’t decorate a house?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:45 PM
1

Answer my question first.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:42 PM
-1

Edited that someone changed my mind on that one point.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:41 PM
2

Educating my daughter doesn’t change the fact of men being predators.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:41 PM
1

You asked and I did not answer. Correct. “You should..” Let me stop you there. Don’t ever tell a woman what she should do.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:40 PM
1

Are you suggesting I caused these feelings of entitlement?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:39 PM
7

Except it doesn’t require a lot of money to live my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:39 PM
1

Shut the fuck up. Stop mansplaining how to not get raped.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:38 PM
1

The woman doesn’t cause the entitlement or the assault no matter what she does or doesn’t do. There is no way to mitigate entitlement. Full stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:37 PM
1

If feels like an endorsement of those men’s feelings to me. But I agree it is not.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:37 PM
2

Prove that people who take care produce better results. Every woman I know takes every single precaution and we still get SAed.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:36 PM
2

That is so not true. There are so many other things that could shore up the defense between my daughter and a rapist that is more than hope and preparation. You’re truly disgusting.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:35 PM
2

That would be totally reasonable. If I was acting like a jerk, I should be treated like one.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:34 PM
2

You can pay for your own food for whatever reason you want. That is clearly stated in my post. But doing it to try to prevent entitlement is a fool’s errand.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:33 PM
2

What should I be doing? What should my reasons be? I’m sure you’re just itching to tell me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:32 PM
-1

I am not the person who said women should pay for their own dates so they don’t make men feel entitled. That’s bonkers to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:32 PM
1

In the way I’m using it, I mean a man who can function on his own without the labor or help of a woman. The same thing we mean when we say “independent woman” is a woman who can function entirely on her own without the labor of a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:31 PM
1

Not in any definition.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:30 PM
2

Fair
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:29 PM
1

I concede that point: taking steps to mitigate something doesn’t mean you agree with the premise. However, taking steps to mitigate this specific thing (entitlement) feels entirely unnecessary to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:13 PM
2

That is not what I am telling you. Thank you for clarifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 03:10 PM
1

That sounds reasonable. I would not have peace if I paid for a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:52 PM
2

A fully independent man doesn’t need a woman to make his house nice.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:51 PM
1

You have that freedom anyway. You don’t have to pay for the right to do what you want with your body. There are plenty of good reasons for women to pay for dates. Preventing entitlement isn’t one of them. I don’t reject the other reasons
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:51 PM
1

It’s not the cultural norm where I’m from.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:49 PM
3

I disagree. I think it is paying a man to not hurt you and it’s harmful.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:49 PM
2

I am not going to give a man money to make him calm down. If a man brings a fight, I’ll step up to it. I was in the military. I’ve had plenty of men come at me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:49 PM
3

I didn’t know some of these guys thought like this until after the date. But I’ve walked out of plenty of first dates
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:47 PM
2

I am very sweet unless someone is rude to me. Then the gloves come off.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:41 PM
3

It was in another post.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:40 PM
2

Expecting commitment and expecting to have access to someone’s body are not the same and you know it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:39 PM
1

Yes. That’s why I don’t pay to try to prevent that.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:39 PM
2

No. I am not going to manage a man’s behavior or expectations.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:38 PM
3

Well, you could have read the post before you commented. I was specially talking about women who pay the bill to prevent a man from feeling entitled. That’s all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:37 PM
2

Nope. I won’t change my behavior to manage a man’s emotions. I do the same thing every time. He can decide how he feels about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:37 PM
3

I am not the person who said she does this. I am responding to the women who say they think this way.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:36 PM
1

Calm down. I pay all my own bills too. That’s not special. My only point here is that paying for dinner doesn’t protect you in any way from entitlement.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:35 PM
-1

Okay. Then don’t be a fully independent man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:33 PM
2

I’m not into video game stuff but I like science. I actually think some STEM conventions are a good idea. I would enjoy going to one anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:33 PM
2

These are not equivalent. You’ve gone off on a tangent that isn’t making sense
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:32 PM
9

Then you will stay unhappy. That must suck.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:31 PM
4

That must suck. But that wasn’t my point. If you have an amazing life, you can find ways to not be so dependent on sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:30 PM
2

No it doesn’t remove that bullshit excuse. That’s my whole point.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:29 PM
1

Eww. No. He wasted my time.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:29 PM
2

I grew up with the Green River Killer in my back yard. I taught my daughters how to be as safe as they can be. Beyond that, I’m not worried about pissing off a man. He can just stay mad.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:28 PM
2

The labor is dealing with the sixteen angry texts after the meal when you told him you don’t want to see him again.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:26 PM
2

Nope. If a man invites me out and then doesn’t make good conversation or acts entitled or does one of the thousand things a man can do to ruin a first date, I’m not going to reward him with money.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:26 PM
2

If a man throws a fit, I’m supposed to act like the adult? No.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:25 PM
1

Yes. I love that I got to teach my daughters all the ways to not be raped (we hope!)
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:24 PM
2

No one is forcing men to pay. Calm down.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:23 PM
3

Sure. That’s a great reason to pay for half. That’s not the reason some women were giving for doing it. My whole point is that if you’re doing it to prevent entitlement, it won’t work.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:22 PM
2

These men can stay angry. There is nothing women can do to prevent assault. We can try but it’s not enough. Ever. If a man comes after me because I didn’t pay for dinner and he wants sex, we have guns for that in my state.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:21 PM
2

So, your premise is that I should pay only if it’s a shitty date? Wat?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:20 PM
1

I support women’s choices even when I don’t agree with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:19 PM
2

No one said not to bail. Always walk away the moment something isn’t right for you. Thats a life rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:19 PM
1

Sure. The justice system is notoriously kind to women who call in these types of situations. /s/. But not talking about actual assault. I’m talking about feelings of entitlement
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:18 PM
2

I am not quiet about what I’m looking for on a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:17 PM
3

I can totally see multiple reasons to pay for myself and do when it feels right. Maybe I am just too defiant but I am not going to pay if a man acts up in any way.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:16 PM
1

I have never been afraid of being uncomfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:15 PM
3

No one is stopping you from doing exactly as you please.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:12 PM
2

I don’t go on a date if I’m not interested in someone romantically. That’s called being friends. He almost always changes my mind in that first date though.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:11 PM
1

If you think paying for a meal will keep you safe from bad actions of bad men, you’re delusional.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:10 PM
2

No behavior on the part of me will prevent an abuser from attacking me. I assume all men are dangerous. Why do a thing like pay for my meal to try to prevent violence? That’s not on me to prevent.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:10 PM
4

I will continue to ignore any social context that means I’m supposed to manage the emotions of a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:08 PM
1

Nope. If he gets annoyed and upset, I’m going to order more stuff so he has to pay more.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:07 PM
3

That’s a reflection of the past where men had to pay huge dowries to get a wife. It’s a reflection of the natural world where men do fancy dances and build elaborate nests to attract a mate. Women have more options so men have to compete but that’s a different discussion. We can change the culture and maybe they would be good but I still won’t play by any “rule” that says what I do on a date will determine if my date treats me like he’s entitled.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:07 PM
4

Why would I go on a date with someone I wasn’t romantically interested in?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:04 PM
2

Who cares about a guilt trip? We don’t have to accept that. Walk away.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:03 PM
2

You’re not in control of the situation by throwing down some money. It’s fine if it makes you feel in control but men generally do what they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:02 PM
2

I am not interested in sex on a first date. I go out with my girlfriends plenty. A date is an opportunity to court me and show me what you have to offer. Just like I show up with what I have to offer.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 02:00 PM
0

I am only speaking about the women who pay for this specific reason. I don’t agree with it. I think it exacerbates the entitlement problem. “Yes, you are entitled to my body if you pay. Yes, sir.” Nope.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:59 PM
0

I have no problem with a woman paying for her half of the date. My problem is when she pays for half the date to try to prevent bad male behavior. That is useless and not worth the money.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:57 PM
3

You get to set your own boundaries about how many dates you pay for. A woman owes you nothing.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:57 PM
2

I mean, I don’t have conversations with men that I don’t want to have. He is not entitled to that either. I’ve had men get really mad after I didn’t want a second date with them and go on rants or text me a bunch of awful stuff. Block. Walk away. Thank you for your time. Not my problem to solve before or after it happens.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:56 PM
2

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:54 PM
2

Okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:54 PM
1

I don’t care what his motivation in paying for dinner is. That’s his business.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:53 PM
0

“She wants to avoid evoking entitlement..” That is where it becomes a problem for me. Why are we, as women, doing any labor at all to help a man manage his expectations and emotions? There is no way to avoid “evoking” entitlement because the entitlement already exists. By taking steps to combat that misplaced entitlement, you encourage the concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:52 PM
3

“What you are suggesting…” no I’m not. Get a grip.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:47 PM
3

Yes. I get to do and believe what I want. And I’ll never agree that a man is entitled to my body because he bought dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:47 PM
3

So why do some women pretend they do?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:46 PM
2

This is the most disgusting comment on this post. You’re basically saying a woman who pays is preventing sexual assault. That’s simply not true and really really gross. Red flag warning on this predator.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:45 PM
4

Men who blame women for being assaulted are already dead inside. No need to engage with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:44 PM
4

Except even marriage doesn’t entitle you to sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:43 PM
1

Yes. It’s not as well written as it could be.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:43 PM
3

That’s not a date to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:42 PM
2

I don’t care if he feels entitled. It is not my job to manage his emotions. He needs to do that himself.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:41 PM
1

Yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:40 PM
-1

Then why pay? What benefit of safety do you get? Entitled men will feel entitled no matter what.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:40 PM
3

That is a fair thing to disagree on.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:39 PM
3

This “defense” of paying for your own date is just pandering to the male experience at the cost of women. No. Won’t do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:38 PM
3

ALL women take precautions. Many women still get abused. Stop victim blaming.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:37 PM
2

That’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking specifically about the behavior of women following a rule set up by men in an attempt to protect themselves. It doesn’t work and it’s pointless. Pay or don’t pay based on whatever other criteria you choose.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:36 PM
3

Disagree. If you pay to prevent a bad behavior, you’re agreeing that there is some action you can take to prevent bad behavior. Men would like you believe this is true but it’s not. You could pay for the whole date and a man may still feel entitled. The entitlement is not dependent on the woman’s action so why change your actions?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:35 PM
1

I have some typos. I’ll fix those. But the title isn’t missing a NOT. If you follow their rules, you’re agreeing with them. Don’t agree with this “rule”
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:33 PM
0

So we agree.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:31 PM
-2

It doesn’t though. That’s the men’s rule: don’t make us mad or we hurt you. Reject that rule, don’t acquiesce to it. Fuck that. I make them mad on purpose. Become a problem.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:30 PM
3

Men setting up a precedent that paying for a date entitles them to a woman’s body is the false foundation of this theory. Women don’t “force men to pay.” A man or a woman can each choose if they want to pay or not. “when they have no sexual interest” How does a woman know if she has sexual interest in a man before she meets him for a date? Is every date about sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:29 PM
4

I support women doing whatever they want to stay or feel safe. In fact, I mentioned that in the post. But, why play the game the men created? There is nothing you can do to assuage men. It’s pointless to try.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:25 PM
0

We can do nothing to stop ourselves being harassed or shamed so why also pay for dinner?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:24 PM
0

I am not judging why you do it. I am stating that doing for the expressed purpose of making a man not feel entitled to sex is unnecessary. I would never tell a woman what to do with her own money.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:23 PM
2

I am not complaining. This is a debate post.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:22 PM
3

Correct
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:59 PM
6

It’s almost like magic that way
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:53 PM
2

I don’t see the problem with me doing what I want. What else should I do? What YOU want me to do? lol
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:52 PM
2

Again, show me these people. Your random made up statistics don’t count
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:50 PM
2

If a man does or does not do something. That is entirely on him.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:50 PM
1

I scuba dive, ride motorcycles, dance (cowboy boots are expensive), like vintage fashion, travel, and like trying out new restaurants.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:49 PM
2

Yes. I only make decisions to benefit myself when it comes to first dates. Who else would I be thinking of? Broke men who don’t like how things work?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:48 PM
2

Here is why I don’t believe in “don’t pay for your date if you’re a woman because a man will feel entitled to sex.” There is nothing a woman can do or not do to make a man feel or not feel entitled to sex. A man feels how he feels whether she pays or not. The problem is that by paying for yourself, you’re agreeing with the man that dinner is enough “payment” for a man to feel entitled to sex. I don’t agree with that so I don’t pay. A man is NEVER entitled to my body. Even if he pays me a million…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:47 PM
1

You get to make your house however you want. That’s the whole point. No independent man would ever have a house that didn’t have art on the walls and carefully curated vintage furniture.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:43 PM
8

Do men like being lonely? Because this is how you stop being lonely without leeching off a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:42 PM
2

Okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:41 PM
9

Why do you think women like me make our lives so full of friends and family? Loneliness because you don’t have a partner is a choice. You can get your needs met without a partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 12:38 PM
2

“When I go out on the town” does not mean I wear makeup every day. Wtf are you even going on about if you agree that the work I put into my looks is effort? I don’t have a husband. Don’t be gross. Why would my looks count as effort on a fifth date and not a first date? The man gets the same benefit.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 08:12 AM
2

I have never said I am “always wearing makeup.” In fact, I only wear makeup for the most part for dates, going out. and important work things. I sweat too much at the gym and swim almost daily so it doesn’t make sense to wear makeup every day. I can understand why a man like you might not view it as effort. You likely have never seen the time and care it takes for women to get dressed up. When I’m preparing for a date, I carefully choose my outfit and makeup to please the person I’m going to mee…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 07:43 AM
-1

What if I don’t hate ALL men?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 06:48 AM
14

In general, I think lonely men would be happier and more likely to find partners if they acted more like single women. Have friends and hobbies, have a great career, go on spa days to look more handsome, build deep relationships of a non-sexual nature, keep a tidy and well decorated house, throw dinner parties and read therapy books about how to love yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 06:44 AM
2

It’s not about the value of the time. It’s about who invites someone out. If I invite you over to my house for dinner, it would be silly for you to bring chicken. If you invite me out for dinner, why would I bring chicken? It doesn’t make any sense. If you ask someone to take time out of their schedule to come give you attention, you can reciprocate with a gesture. I don’t make these rules. They are just how things work in my life.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/08/26 01:48 AM
1

I am not shy about what I like. I’m a project manager and I know how to get results that I want. Part of the task is to make sure you have a clear target. It’s a lot easier to hit it if you know what you’re aiming for: But this is my way of going about it. I’m just direct. I ask for what I want rather than hint or expect my partner to guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 11:01 PM
2

Why do you ask?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:41 PM
0

No. Not even close to right. You think like a child. You’re trying to imagine you can know what four billion women think. Why does it matter why a woman wears makeup? All women are not the same person. And we wear makeup for a variety of reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 10:32 PM
4

I don’t want either at the moment.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 08:35 PM
1

Don’t talk to me unless you have gold.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:14 PM
4

There is a whole group of men who are happy to pay for things. That doesn’t harm you in any way. I am expensive. I have expensive hobbies. I pay for all my own expenses because I am a single woman. I have chosen to be in this price range. If a man wants to pay my expenses, this is how much they cost. I am not demanding a man pay for what I spend on myself. If he chooses to take them on, and they sometimes do, it costs a lot of money. I don’t know what about this is hard to comprehend.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:13 PM
3

Or human beings with needs that cost money to fill. Thats why we have our own money now. Because you think spending money on a woman entitles you to something. If at any point, you believe you are entitled to a woman’s body, even if you spent a million dollars, you are wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:56 PM
6

You thought there was only one reason all women collectively as a hive mind wear makeup?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:53 PM
1

Only broke dudes complain
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:53 PM
2

Yes. Men are notoriously accurate when they are emotional and lashing out at women. I should totally take everything you say to heart and feel terrible about myself. Thank you so much for changing my perspective. You’re a real hero to women. Go ahead and give yourself that attaboy.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:35 PM
2

If I had a dollar for every time a loser on the internet called me a prostitute, I wouldn’t have to go into the law office tomorrow. Yawn.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:30 PM
2

You sound crazy man /s
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:29 PM
3

If I had a dollar for every time a loser on the internet called me a prostitute, I wouldn’t have to do to the office tomorrow. Yawn.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:25 PM
4

You don’t get to decide what effort I do or do not put into a date. I am not a trained lap dog who wears makeup when a man wants it and doesn’t wear makeup when a man doesn’t like it. This isn’t Burger King. You don’t get it your way.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:24 PM
7

I was pushed into being a “submissive wife” for 21 years by my religious family and community. Now I do whatever I want and I tell my kids to never live like that. It’s a nightmare and it’s extremely traumatic. I don’t care if every man on this planet dies alone. I will never, ever be part of a dynamic that doesn’t celebrate everything I am.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:10 PM
5

How do you know what those women in medical school dream of?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:08 PM
1

You came on here to say you pay on dates so you don’t feel like you owe anyone something. That’s horrible and you shouldn’t have to do that. I stand by my “advice.”
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:05 PM
2

I wasn’t as clear as I could have been. My point was that people have managed to meet and fall in love for centuries without going on formal dates with reservations and money being spent. There are plenty of other ways to get to know people. I go dancing a lot at places with free parking, no cover, and a live band who plays for tips. It literally costs nothing to go dance at that location that night. If a date took me to do that and spent zero money, I would still enjoy it. I also love a date wh…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:04 PM
1

That is a very valid way to use that kind of feedback. Every rejection is an opportunity for me to evaluate my values and reaction and make sure I’m always aligned with the way I want to show up in the world. But, I still don’t want to hear it from a date.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:55 PM
3

That’s not at all what I said. Did you notice the other words?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:52 PM
1

I don’t have a pill but I reject the notion that the way I choose to meet and interact with men is less valid for making human connection than the way you choose to do it. Don’t be a woman giving advice. Be a woman who lets other women do what works for them without calling them a whore.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:46 PM
2

You understand that for most of human history, most average people couldn’t really go out and have fun. That was for rich people only. Poor people still found ways to meet and marry. If you can’t afford dates, do something else. Some of us can afford dates and we want to go on them and still we connect to others on a deep level. Just having money involved does not invalidate the connection between the two people.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:44 PM
0

That’s not even what I said.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:00 PM
1

If I had a dollar for every time a man called me a whore, I wouldn’t need to go to work tomorrow. Yawn. This is just how dating works. Most relationships have some transactional nature to them. You want to pretend it’s some moral failing on my part to accept a gift that is given to me. Whatever, bro.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:53 PM
1

No one is getting paid. He’s eating the food too.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:32 PM
1

Why would I pay for anything I don’t have to?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:14 PM
3

You can do stuff and complain at the same time. Just ask my trainer. But, I don’t have any compassion for these men who hate women and still want to go on dates with them.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:03 PM
2

It’s not less valuable. He asked me to show up at a place. I did. I would otherwise have been doing something else.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:02 PM
3

No one is making you,
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:00 PM
2

Because a MAN is asking for it. You answered your own question.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:59 PM
2

You’re using the same language at OP and expecting a different result. Not going to happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:59 PM
1

It’s not mistreatment but if other men do it and you don’t, you may miss out. That’s the system. I didn’t create it but it is that way.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:58 PM
7

I choose to and I don’t want to go on a date with a man who doesn’t put in the “same effort”. Just like y’all.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:57 PM
2

I didn’t create the system.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:56 PM
5

So, you haven’t even met a woman and you’re already resentful that you may have to give her attention or spend a few bucks to get to know her. First day in the world?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:56 PM
3

I go on dates for the same reason. To meet a man to fall in love with. But, there is still a transition of time, conversation, energy, and resource. To pretend that is prostitution is limited in imagination. It’s just how things work.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:54 PM
8

I don’t know how men who complain this much get anything at all in life.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:52 PM
2

That has not been my experience at my age in my town.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:51 PM
–

I could agree with you but then we’d both be wrong. I’m a little sad to see how uncurious the youth are today. Glad you got it all figured out, kid!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:53 AM
0

I don’t trust a man I went on some dates with to give me good information in this area. I can barely trust them to show up for a date. I think if my trauma was causing issues my friends would notice and say something
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:45 AM
3

This may be another age gap issue in our understanding of the world. I am 49 years old. I know who I am and how I like to be. When I go out on the town, I wear makeup 100% of the time. It’s not a mask, it’s part of my outfit because I love fashion and want the whole outfit to be a statement. This is part of who I am. I’m a dancer and looking a certain way is part of that. I am also a very competent legal project manager and run a team of attorneys. I love my job and have a ton of fun working wit…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:40 AM
–

Well, that’s not where it comes from. It comes from moms who raise their sons right. To understand it is a privilege to get the undivided attention of a beautiful woman. It comes from the idea that there are social graces that indicate civility and respect. A man in the south doesn’t open a door for a granny because he believes women are less than or because he wants to get laid. He does it because it is the polite thing to do. Paying for a date is also the polite thing to do. It’s about using w…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:27 AM
2

I am neither inauthentic nor incapable of love. Plus like literally everything you’ve written about the south, which is just ignorance and lack of education rather than a lie, I think.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:17 AM
6

Yes. Women are doing exactly as they please. What is the problem, again?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:15 AM
3

Okay. You don’t like how some women think. And? Don’t pay for the cake.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:14 AM
0

That is obvious by your comments and likely to be your constant state of being unless you wise up big time.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:12 AM
2

You didn’t answer my question. How does it feel inside you when you type cruel and untrue things on the internet aimed at a woman you loathe? Does it make you feel strong and masculine?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:11 AM
3

Gaslighting. “I said the first thing and it’s not true but I’m going to pretend it’s true because that fits my narrative that all women who don’t behave the way I want are wrong” “I said a horrible thing but that’s not what I meant even though I used the words that mean that” The only reason I’m still taking to you is because it’s insane to me how narrow your view of the world is. Are you like 18 years old?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:10 AM
3

*Lived experience
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:08 AM
–

I live here. Now you’re mansplaining my actual literal home. I’ll bet you’ve never ever been here and just think it’s like on TV. Yeah: southerners can be racist af. So can northerners. ICE is killing people of color all over the country. It’s a nightmare for Black people and anyone who looks vaguely Mexican. That has nothing to do with your complaint about men being generous to their dates Your thesis is that the men I go on dates with pay for dinner because of historical racism. Gtfo.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:07 AM
0

May you have the dates you deserve.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 07:00 AM
2

NSFW profile and hides his posts. He’s a pornographer.
/r/ExRedPill02/08/26 06:59 AM
–

You’re really not. Pearls before swine. If you had any curiosity at all, you would have asked questions about it instead of just bringing up Jim Crow for some reason. You only like to say how things are. You have no curiosity about how things are. That’s a man who can’t learn or grow. You already know everything.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:57 AM
2

I hope it made you feel powerful to write that. Strong.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:55 AM
3

You are inauthentic You are incapable of love
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:55 AM
3

Y’all are like Christians. So many ideas about how every one else should be. Do what works for you and just chill out about what every one else is doing. I don’t pay for dates. So don’t go on a date with me. The guys I go on dates with always make more money than I do and would be offended if I offered to pay. I do what is standard for the culture in my area.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:44 AM
6

Have you nursed an infant and a toddler at the same time for almost a year all night long? Do you know how much a night nurse for an infant costs? To say it isn’t 24/7 when you have multiple small children and are pregnant and breastfeeding is bonkers. When was my time off, exactly? In the 49 minutes between one kid being done eating and the other starting? I didn’t have a week off for a decade.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:40 AM
2

Did that feel good to write? Make you feel like you got the upper hand just through cruelty? Congratulations.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:32 AM
2

It’s pretty much a pity party, bro.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:31 AM
2

I am always ready to pay for myself. It would actually offend my date if I offered to pay because he would think that I thought he wasn’t a gentleman. You get how the same action can be perceived a different way by two different men. If I went on a date with one of the lovely cowboys I dance with and I offered to pay, he would wonder what was wrong with me. If I went on a date with a guy like you and didn’t offer to pay, you’d get indignant and say I wasn’t “being an adult” because that’s “how a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:29 AM
0

Okay. So you said your perspective of my culture. Would you like to learn about it or just stick with your assumptions and bias? You say you want to weed out the women with that vibe but your whole entire post is about how there aren’t any women left who are willing to pay for themselves because generous men are ruining it. There are no women willing to just take your no-makeup, no effort self for what you are. Sounds like you’re in a tough spot with no options.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:08 AM
4

I am fairly confident that I am older than you are by many decades. You still didn’t answer my question. Like a petulant child.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:05 AM
9

Any man who asked me to stop wearing makeup isn’t a man I’d like to date. It has nothing to do with authenticity. It has to do with my personal preference and how I show up in the world. The fact that you read into all these nothing things like makeup and who pays the bill and draw broad conclusions about what it all means for men and women and how things ought to be is a recipe for unhappiness. I date the way I want to date. I am deeply loved and very happy. My life doesn’t need to look like yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 06:04 AM
4

Well, you don’t know anything about my life and this comment wasn’t for you. You don’t comprehend the culture I live in and think everyone is just like you. This comment was for women who pay so the man doesn’t feel entitled to sex. That’s a terrible way to do it. Just don’t go on a date with a man like you who thinks paying for a date entitles him to something more than the company of an interesting woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:57 AM
0

I asked a question.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:55 AM
12

Is it possible women sometimes wear makeup because they like how it makes them feel (for them) and also sometimes because they like how it makes them look for their partner? My date expects me to show up looking like I got dressed up to go somewhere nice because I did. I don’t wear makeup every day but I wouldn’t dream of going on a date without carefully choosing my outfit and makeup for the occasion and looking my absolute best. But that’s not effort to you. The thing you said that is effort i…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:38 AM
14

II was genuinely curious why you don’t count a woman spending time and intention making herself look more attractive for her date doesn’t count as effort? If not that, what does? What does a woman do on a date that lets you know she’s invested and wants to be there?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:22 AM
11

Why is putting on makeup not effort?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 05:12 AM
1

Did you just try to use a pew report to mansplain womanhood to a woman? Wow
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:49 AM
10

She asked where they are. Can you point to them?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:48 AM
11

Do you wear makeup on a date?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:47 AM
0

Should they split the bill if one of them makes way more money than the other?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:46 AM
7

I expect a man to pay on a date because the “transaction” already occurred. He’s not paying for dinner because he wants or expects to get intimate later. He’s paying for dinner because I showed up. He asked me to show up in a place at a time because he wanted to spend time with me and also eat food. Transaction completed. Nothing owed. I, apparently, do not understand y’all paying for stuff.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:44 AM
4

Do the hours calculated that women work include all night long when they have a nursing infant? Because that’s 24/7. What about the hours she’s gestating the kids?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:38 AM
6

Who is suggesting you go on a bunch of random dates and pay for them?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:32 AM
–

Where did I say “real men” do anything? I live in a place where the cultural norm is for the man to pay.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 04:30 AM
–

I am sorry but you must send me money if you want more attention.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 03:05 AM
12

Sometimes you have to take a chance in life. If dating is such a financial drain, don’t do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:49 AM
–

Sure man
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:48 AM
–

Meh. Thats like low effort gaslighting. C-
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:43 AM
–

“Yet so hated…” are you suggesting I’m going on dates with people from the past? Or are you rejecting the entirety of southern dating culture because some people are racist? Are you suggesting Jim Crow was caused by women who expect men to pay for dates? No one said women are objects. Not everything expensive can be bought. You are batting zero on saying anything true. I am expensive. It costs a lot to be me. That’s why I have two jobs. What about me costing a lot to live means I’m for sale in a…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:36 AM
-1

Yeah. My problem with the men’s shorts is that they’re too baggy and long. Especially the board shorts. If a man can reach his fingertips past the hem of his shorts, they’re too long and he looks Amish. There should be a dress code or something. They have to go home and change if their shorts are too long. Maybe get out some scissors. It’s pretty embarrassing for a man to show his knees but not his thighs. You have to be able to tell if he’s been skipping leg day or it’s not even worth the bothe…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:28 AM
-1

If a man wears either of these and isn’t at the beach, I assume he peaked in college when cargo shorts were in.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:24 AM
–

Not sure what race has to do with it. You have no idea how men who pay for dates think since you are not one of them. Women are expensive. I didn’t say men could buy them. It costs a lot to be a woman. If you don’t want to pay for that, don’t. Plenty of men want to. Never once did I mention sexual activity with these dates. This is just how dating works in the South. Gentleman pay for things and ladies provide the charm. No sex required.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:22 AM
15

Why have other men set the bar slightly above the level of nothing and now I have to reach it?! Waaaaaa!!!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:16 AM
2

Explain then. What are men supposed to be?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:15 AM
3

What are you talking about then?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:14 AM
2

What you are talking about is asking the patriarchy to punish women for having standards. Women have started choosing men who are willing to shell out some cash and that ain’t you. So, you want to collectively have all men punish women for just dating in the normal way? That sounds unhinged. Have you considered just getting a job?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:14 AM
16

I live in the South. No southern gentleman would ask a lady to pay for herself on a first or any date. Women are expensive. Find one in your price range and stop complaining. The only men who complain about other men paying for dinner like a proper gentleman is broke ass dudes to resent that they can’t afford a woman. These men who pay for dinners aren’t simps. They’re just men who know how dating works. You don’t have to play the game but don’t hate the people who play it better than you do.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/08/26 02:11 AM
2

For me, a grand gesture isn’t meaningful unless it reflects a deep understanding of who I am. I’ve had men take me out to extravagant dinners and buy me expensive presents that were obviously very welcome and amazing but didn’t show a deep understanding of what makes me feel cared for and cherished. They had the notion that ‘women want to be spoiled’ and just went with what felt right to them, without really searching for what would really resonate as “spoiling” to me. I am very grateful to men …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 09:38 PM
3

I have had a lot of therapy too and feel very comfortable with who I am. I know I am a great friend and a good partner when I have one. If a man goes on one date or ten with me and doesn’t want to be with me after that point, that is not my problem to solve. He can stay or go. It won’t change how I show up in the world or how I relate to people or how I love. I once had a guy get really mad when I didn’t want to hear why he didn’t want to go out anymore. I didn’t care so I walked away. Still don…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 08:57 PM
8

I actually never want to know why a man wants to stop seeing me. Literally don’t care why.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 05:33 PM
2

I did want a lifelong commitment but we don’t always get what we want. I didn’t fail to try.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 05:31 PM
21

I mean, is ending a relationship that isn’t right for you really failing? My marriage “failed” and it was the best thing to ever happen to me. Even if I don’t have a partner at the end of my life, I won’t die alone (unless I die on my motorcycle). I have amazing kids and family and friends who love and support single old me. I am never alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 02:55 PM
44

This is a perfectly fine preference to have but please, for the love of all that is holy, DO NOT tell the person with the trauma that is the reason you don’t want to date them. Make up literally any other reason. Tell them your tarot reader said it’s a bad match. Tell them they’re too tall or short or whatever. Or do the nice thing and just say “I enjoy spending time with you but we are not a romantic match.” Every trauma survivor already feels like they are going to be rejected for having this …
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 02:43 PM
–

The last guy I dated was extraordinarily wealthy and it made me feel small in some ways. My life and home is modest but it’s happy. I guess I just have enough ego that I want someone who appreciates how hard I work and what it took to get here.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 01:53 PM
–

I am very proud of the career I have built in a law field, have multiple degrees, own my own small business, and men go out of their way to explain to me how they don’t care about how much money I make or my education. It’s a very clear message that the things I value about me are not valued by a lot of my dates. The young men who are new in their careers are generally impressed and also kind of insecure about it but the men my age generally want to make more money than I do. I honestly don’t ca…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 01:09 PM
–

Explain please.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 01:05 PM
–

I am a feminist and a mom. When my son was little, he wanted his toenails painted when I painted his sister’s nails. He usually chose green because that was his favorite color. When I was painting my son’s toenails when he was five years old, I wasn’t thinking about smashing the patriarchy or turning him into a feminist. I was thinking one thing “this is how my son wants his toes to look.” It’s his body and he can do what he wants with it and that’s what I need him to know. He is allowed to be i…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 01:03 PM
–

How’s that going?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/08/26 12:57 PM
1

Maybe they just don’t like sex with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/26 11:48 AM
1

My type is an introverted engineer who likes to talk about aerospace technology and politics and history and philosophy. He’s an intellectual who can make me laugh until I cry. He’s adventurous and loves to explore the world. He’s also masculine and makes me feel safe and will go to the gym with me. The only two men I’ve ever dated that I felt truly compatible with were like this and European. I have never dated a dancer. Any other guys I’ve been out with have not been my type at all and never w…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/07/26 04:45 AM
1

Yes. I can read profiles and choose accordingly.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 10:39 PM
1

It’s unhinged to want to control the demographics of your nation. That’s Nazi territory. I wasn’t bragging, I just failed to mention he was French and not American. All of the foreign born friends I have speak multiple languages. Most Americans don’t.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 09:28 PM
1

Yikes. It is true that homogeneous societies function more smoothly than diverse ones but you’re starting to sound a little unhinged. To you question of why don’t I care? Because I just don’t. I am very old and have seen people clutching their pearls about this or that over the course of my lifetime, screaming “why don’t you care about this pending disaster I’m so worried about?!” I wasn’t worried about Y2K and I’m not worried about Jesus coming back and I’m certainly not worried about whatever …
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 09:20 PM
1

But why the demographics and in what way?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 09:05 PM
–

He did not. He didn’t even want to know their names.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 08:57 PM
1

You sound patriotic. America doesn’t have social safety nets. The economy goes up and down based on the terrible actions of people in power already so I can’t get really concerned or excited about economic doomsayers. I just think it’s not something people need to worry about. So I don’t worry about it. Why do you care about the demographics of your country?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 08:56 PM
1

Sadly, in America we aren’t guaranteed parental leave, no healthcare for infant or mother, and no free schooling before the age of 5. To us, your system seems like a huge safety net.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 08:54 PM
1

Again, I’m not saying they solved the fertility problem. I said they solved the ‘moms not having enough support’ problem. Jeezuz Christ. Can’t you read?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 06:41 PM
1

Why?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 06:40 PM
1

You are a predator. Full stop.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 06:40 PM
2

Not for rich people but for people like me with a modest income.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:40 PM
1

Okay. Well, the article could use some editing as well as the concept.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:05 PM
1

We don’t know until we have the money to truly decide. My decision was purely economic. I actually kind of “adopted” another child when she turned 18 because her parents failed her (she lives with me now while she gets back on her feet.) I may be the exception but maybe not.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:05 PM
2

Thank you very much for sharing this. Interesting insight.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:02 PM
1

I have three kids and work two jobs. If someone else paid my bills, I’d have more kids for sure. Why not?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 03:35 PM
4

Maybe the monetary incentive to have babies needs to go to men and women both?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 03:34 PM
5

Or, people are already choosing to not have babies with men so we need a new solution.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 03:22 PM
4

I don’t see the misandry here. Fact: women are choosing to have fewer children Fact: that isn’t great for economies Fact: women must be enticed to have kids if we want to protect economies Fact: men are not enticing enough Fact: new solution required Fact: one solution is making children without a partner available to all genders so you double the number of people who can have a kid to throw into the grinder of modern capitalism This is giving men an opportunity to have and raise kids without wa…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 03:21 PM
1

I am not talking about fertility at all. I am talking about how European nations have support for mothers. I don’t give a fuck about fertility rates and neither should you. But we should care that the women actually having babies have support because it’s difficult.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:25 PM
5

Did you even read the pamphlet? It was rich commentary on the government’s lack of safety net for struggling people. What is the brilliant commentary here?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:23 PM
3

You don’t have to agree with me but then you’d be wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:21 PM
2

A grown man who doesn’t date women his own age is a man who can’t get women his own age because he’s only at the level of a young person in his success. Sure, there are celebrities and all that with copious amounts of money who can get whatever partner they want, but regular 40 year old guys who date 20 year old women do it because they don’t have the emotional maturity for a real relationship so they find a kid who doesn’t know better.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:39 AM
1

You say you’re dating a 19 year old because she picked you and you’re too icky to get anyone else. I don’t believe you. I believe you started dating her as a child because you are an opportunistic predator. You’re not attracted to kids because they’re kids. You are the kind of predator who looks around you for a vulnerable person that you can mine resources from. She isn’t an autonomous human being to you. She has something you want to take away from her because that’s what predators do. As an a…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:36 AM
6

This modest proposal isn’t making the profound point of the original. It’s just misogyny dressed up as a horrific thought experiment.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:06 AM
4

Humans are great apes. The vast majority of species to have ever lived are now extinct. Humans will be someday too. It is not the job of women to make that not happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 04:04 AM
7

You have a baby then.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:48 AM
1

Figured out how to support moms.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:46 AM
-5

The countries that have figured out how to support moms, I meant. No one but greedy people care about birth rates.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/26 12:45 AM
2

It is true that military folks have a lot of babies.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 11:00 PM
5

Women bear the burden of children. Of the economy will collapse without more children, that is a burden on women alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 10:58 PM
3

Thank you. I think I am a great friend. I don’t have any family here so my friends are everything. I can always be counted on for birthdays and any kind of celebration especially.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 10:23 PM
1

Okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 10:21 PM
-2

It’s almost like they have countries all over the world that have figured this out but the US is behind.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 10:18 PM
7

Why in the world should women be responsible for the economy? That’s ridiculous. That which will not bend must break.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 10:18 PM
1

I am very picky about looks. I’m concerned this would be difficult for me.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 08:23 PM
1

I guess I have a general skepticism for any dating method where the person makes a living doing it.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 08:22 PM
1

They are all selling something.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 08:21 PM
1

I understand what it says its goals are. I simply don’t believe them. Because they are selling this product, they have a vested interest in making sure it doesn’t actually create happy relationships. Keeping women safe is very important. Don’t trust a salesman when it comes to that.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 07:54 PM
3

That is simply incorrect. Just like in the case of denying abortion where the rights of the fetus are put over the rights of the mother, it is immoral to ask a living person to give up their autonomy or comfort for the sake of future potential people. Actual humans have zero obligation to theoretical humans.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 07:35 PM
2

It is normal now. That’s how life works.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 07:03 PM
2

For the economy of a country, you mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 07:03 PM
2

Still wrong. You think you have that obligation but you don’t and neither do I.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 07:00 PM
2

Still not our burden. Humanity can die. (It won’t for another couple hundred thousands of years). No individual is responsible for the continuation of their species.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:59 PM
1

Well, I can say I’m purple but, unless other people can see it too, it’s likely not true.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:58 PM
3

If guys are being judged against other guys, I can see how they can feel good about themselves for not being the “bad guys.” But, if men were judged against women and how they treat women, they’re not even close to a good guy.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:57 PM
1

Maybe. I don’t spend enough time around those folks to know.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:41 PM
1

You’re saying the alternative to women being propagation slaves to men is that there will be slavery?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:23 PM
2

Incorrect. Humans of any genre have no obligation to take on the burden of furthering humanity. And, not having babies isn’t nihilism. You’re being dramatic.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:22 PM
1

Irritable men want stricter laws?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:21 PM
2

I dated a bisexual man for a little bit and his criteria for male partners was WAY different than mine. He didn’t even need to see a face. I need to feel actual affection for someone to be attracted to them, not just see a picture of a body part.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:11 PM
2

Well, I don’t like that formula at all lol. I am well liked by my peers and first dates usually want a second one, so I’m not so weird as to be off-putting. What I am is extremely picky and I want a system to deliver a very specific thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:06 PM
2

Only the women have to carry the babies. The burden is on women until men can figure out how to do that. We will decide if we want to take that burden on or not. You don’t get to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 06:03 PM
2

Why is this burden on women?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 04:25 PM
5

Only a man would suggest women sleep with gross men to continue the species. That’s not how survival of the fittest works. If you’re not in the top group of biological specimens, your genes die out. Women do not owe their bodies to all of humanity. That’s not how it works. Humanity is in no danger of extinction at this point. Any suggestion women need to do something about falling birth rates is just a misogynist desire to control women. We don’t need more babies and we certainly don’t need them…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 04:20 PM
4

The bar I use is: does this man treat me as well and my female friends. If not, he’s not for me. That’s such a high bar that most women can exceed and very few men seem to.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:43 PM
2

I say dumb stuff all the time. I would hate for someone to assume I’m an ahole because of how I worded my profile bio. It is true that bad guys often tell on themselves, and I’m aware of what to look for when they do, but I can’t judge like that method requires because I understand the complexity of human beings.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:41 PM
14

It’s amazing how many men are like “but I didn’t commit a crime so I’m a good guy.” Sir, the bar isn’t that low.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:25 PM
2

This is just proving that men feel entitled. You’re not. Full stop. We don’t care if the whole world is in monogamous relationships. That’s an unnecessary goal.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 03:24 PM
1

Well, I am a two-step dancer in a town where that is a huge scene. Most of my friends are dancers and I spend a lot of time in the arms of beautiful dancers- friends and strangers. I’ve been asked out a few times while dancing but never had it go anywhere. These are very close connections to people and partner dancing is a unique experience with regard to physical touch with a complete stranger. If there were going to be sparks, this seems like the place for it. People have asked me why I haven’…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:28 PM
1

I mean, there can only be so many people that are a match for me. Maybe I’m not running into them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:25 PM
2

I am 49 so the men I meet tend to have their hair situation already established and I could love a man who become chubby but I’m not at all attracted to a chubby man now. But… I did swipe on a bald guy a few weeks ago and our text conversation was a dud but I did a video chat with him last night and it ended up lasting over three hours and we talked about politics and anthropology and economics and history and it was incredibly stimulating for me and exactly what I’m looking for in a date. So, I…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:20 PM
1

I talk to everyone but I don’t run into men I want to date. I go out a lot and have several hobbies that put me in contact with men (dancing and motorcycles) but, when I look at those men, I just see friends and no dating potential. Am I looking at them wrong?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:15 PM
1

I generally talk to anyone to talks to me but I don’t date them.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:45 PM
1

I don’t think other women factor in to this equation at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:21 PM
1

I know exactly what I want and have found it two times but in one case, distance was an issue (we are still great friends and love each other deeply) and the other may come back around but wasn’t ready to get exclusive when I was but I’m not waiting for him to figure out I’m lovely. I know there are people out there for me but I am not just picky, I prefer to stay alone than be with anyone who isn’t a true heart connection. I meet a lot of nice and handsome and interesting men but not one I conn…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:21 PM
2

That one won’t work for me long term. I do that short term all the time out of exhaustion.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:18 PM
1

That would feel like giving up to me
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:18 PM
1

I know a lot of people in my town but don’t want to date in my dance community. I don’t really get crushes very often. I do ask people out but it hasn’t come to anything. I am doing the things but it’s been years now. Either I’m missing some vital information about myself that makes me unsuccessful in this arena or I’m kidding myself that I can actually find a person I connect with.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:17 PM
1

That’s the truth of it and I’m working to internalize that. Recently walked away from the best man I’ve ever met because he wasn’t ready to get exclusive and I’m not the kind of woman to sit at home and wonder if the guy I like is on a date with another woman. It’s below my dignity. I had to just let that one be. I wanted to be with this man more than I can even say but he wasn’t ready and I’m not a sucker. So, it is what it is. If he wants to come back he can, but I’m letting it go. The IG ther…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:15 PM
1

You actually touched on one of the current flaws in my “system.” I do care about looks and fitness and attractiveness and I worry that I might be missing a real heart connection because I swipe no on all bald and chubby men and men. One of them might show up for me in a way other guys haven’t but I don’t know if attraction will build.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:12 PM
2

I am probably the most earnest and giving and enthusiastic person I know. In the past, I put in too much effort and ended up carrying conversations, planning dates, and becoming exhausted the same way as when I was married. I need something different. I need a partner to bring their half of the energy.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:10 PM
1

Well, I want to date but I don’t want to date in my dance community. That’s just for friends.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:08 PM
1

I am not sure what my limitations are I have often asked men out I have incredibly high standards because I am independent and educated I see a lot of beautiful men all around me but none are particularly attractive to me. There is no one I know that I have a crush on. I get a crush every couple of years maybe. I have had FWBs in the past when I didn’t have the time or bandwidth for traditional dating but I’ve moved past that. I am ready for a partner and would rather be alone than be in a situa…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:07 PM
0

I do block matches. I just don’t assume I can tell everything about a man based on two sentences on his profile.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:03 PM
2

I live a wonderful life full of amazing people and experiences and I have not found someone I like enough to date.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 05:55 AM
1

I don’t want YouTube. I’m an adult.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 05:54 AM
1

Same
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 05:53 AM
1

I know exactly what I’m looking for and I’ve found it twice.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:34 AM
1

I’m not young.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:33 AM
1

JFC.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:32 AM
1

Well, maybe I just have a lot of friends but I see plenty of ugly people in relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:31 AM
1

I do think women tend to be more successful early on. The job market is bad for us all but I do have decades of experience. It’s interesting that men would just choose a less successful partner rather than just wait until they are at the same level as their peers.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:30 AM
2

I am hearing you.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:29 AM
1

That’s all I do is work, gym, friends, go out dancing.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 02:28 AM
1

That’s not good at all. It happened to me a few years ago from a dating app guy. I’m sorry.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:57 AM
1

Correct.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:56 AM
2

I have cobbled together something of a plan using advice and experience and I am making very good choices about who I spend time with and I think I’m actually ready to meet the right person due to my own growth just through failure. But, I wish I could nail down a method that will net me the right matches.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:56 AM
3

I have seen my male friend swiping on everyone.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:54 AM
2

My friend keeps telling me this but she doesn’t get better results than I do and, since I was a professional writer for a lot of years, she constantly sending me verbiage to “evaluate” for red flags. She and I do not see the same things at all in those profiles. I think her view is skewed by this method and not in a good way. Have you gotten a partner out of this method?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:54 AM
3

I believe because I am autistic, I have a system for everything- from my morning routine to how I wash dishes. It is not insecurity that makes me crave order and rules and a system that takes one from point A to point B. I am also a project manager and all I do is create systems to produce the outcome I desire with the legal cases I manage. It’s the system that creates the success.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:52 AM
2

I only really connect with people who show up with their authentic selves open to meet. I can smell a faker a mile away. But, that’s not even close to the problem with the matches I get and the interactions I have.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:50 AM
1

This has always seemed like the best way for me to find someone to date but I ended up putting myself in a real pickle. I am extremely active in a local honky tonk two-step community in my city. I dance 3-4 nights a week and most of my best friends are in that community. It seems like an obvious place to find someone to date because we are already seeing each other regularly in a space we frequent. Plenty of people who dance in this scene date people in it but, last year, I dated a local musicia…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 01:48 AM
1

Some women, like me, value looks and won’t date a fat or bald guys but I know a bunch of fat bald guys in long term relationships. So, there are women out there who don’t care if you’re ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:05 AM
1

By nature of a community I participate in, I have a lot of younger friends (in their late 20s, early 30s) and the women all seem to be doing better than the men with jobs and living situations because they work really really hard.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:02 AM
1

This shows a bias towards men.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/07/26 12:00 AM
0

Every single man my age, with my level of education, must make more money than I do or else he is not working hard enough. I know this because I took 14 years off from the job market to raise children. A man who started where I was before I had kids (project manager with a master’s degree) and is my same age, better make more money than I do because he didn’t take 14 years off to raise kids. If he was working that whole time and still not doing better than I am, then he doesn’t have the drive I …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 11:58 PM
2

Absolutely
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 11:40 PM
1

You are not making progress because you won’t listen. Humble yourself and grow.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 11:23 PM
1

Okay, sis.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:23 PM
1

Are you offering?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:23 PM
–

More excuses. Typical.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:06 PM
–

I do a fair bit of casual dating as well. We aren’t intimate but we’re also not committed in any way. It’s fun and low pressure.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 10:01 PM
–

I honestly don’t know how I would have even figured out what works for me without trying all the things.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:59 PM
–

I did this the opposite way. I got married really young as a Christian woman and was married for 21 years before I got to go out and experience different partners. I went through what I call my ho phase and even had a list of ‘things I wanted to try.” For me it was about figuring out what I like and what works for me with my sexuality and relationships. I had a few regrettable partners for sure, but now I am back to what I consider normal for me. I don’t get intimate with a partner unless we are…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:58 PM
1

So sad for you. Good for us. We are tired of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:52 PM
1

You don’t sound calm. Or rational.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:52 PM
1

Or maybe you have other data. I don’t know.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:50 PM
1

I am certainly confused by this whole thing but I was trying to be a little bit funny because otherwise this is depressing af
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:19 PM
1

I think you will be unhappy no matter what your situation with a partner. The fact that you blame anyone but yourself for not having what you want is why you will never get it. If you really wanted to be a stay at home parent, you would listen to the thoughtful and helpful advice people have given you. But you won’t do that. You will continue to blame women for your failures. You will continue to believe you are owed this life you want. That’s not how any of it works. You have to become the man …
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:18 PM
14

Correct. I give a lot in all my relationships and ask for little in return but he’s not my friend anymore and I wouldn’t want a woman to date him and experience a birthday like that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:12 PM
1

You know the answer to that. Being short is a disadvantage. This is data. Use it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 09:11 PM
1

That is unnecessarily unkind but also probably true. It’s not your friend’s job to make your peace with your height. I have plenty of male friends who would never date me because of my age. I don’t take that personally. It’s not nice for your friend to say that but the insecurity is on you. That’s something you need to work out in therapy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 07:38 PM
15

He was not my partner but he was my friend. He was able to spend time with me if I came to his house to watch football but never able to reach the level of showing up for me as a friend. Here’s an example: For four years in a row I brought him cake and food for his birthday and sent a photo to his mom because that’s what he wanted for his birthday. For my birthday last year, he promised to come to the party my kids were throwing for me and he offered to bring the cake. He ghosted. Never called o…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 07:36 PM
0

The 2 genders lol
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:39 PM
12

I had a friend who really wanted to date someone and I would never have introduced him to my friends because he would have been a terrible partner. But I told him that.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:37 PM
2

I mean, if your friend hurts your feelings, you can address that. I believe my friends when they tell me things because they love me. Even if I don’t want to hear the thing. If someone is just mean, I don’t be friends with them. You get to choose.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:34 PM
1

Okay. Progress takes time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 05:33 PM
2

I think it’s easy to tell if a man has some close female friends or just hangs out around women.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:56 PM
3

An insecure woman isn’t appropriate to date anyway. Bullet dodged.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:56 PM
2

I don’t agree with all my friends for sure but I certainly want to know how they think.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:55 PM
1

That is changing rapidly.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:55 PM
-15

Is that why you were friends with women? To get help with dating?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:54 PM
–

So, it’s about how you can’t get laid on “your terms” or anyone else’s terms. Got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:53 PM
0

Never helped with what?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:36 PM
2

How is this not readily apparent?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:36 PM
5

I would never consider dating a man who didn’t have women friends. Doesn’t matter what advice they give or don’t give him.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:35 PM
2

You’d rather not know how your friends think? Why are they your friends? I’m not sure you’re using that word correctly.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:35 PM
3

You need to focus. You’re all over the damn place. I’ve never seen one human with so many wrong ideas. You can want what you want but you’re not going to get it unless you change your perspective. No one is sexually assaulting you. Calm down.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:08 PM
2

You wish women treated each other like that lol.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:07 PM
2

Well, first you’d have to know how my friends treat me. Would you like to know?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:06 PM
3

By your measure, men kill millions of children every time they jerk off.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:06 PM
3

That is literally insane.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:05 PM
2

Like I said. You are not independent. I would never date a man who can’t do everything I can do. He isn’t my equal. A relationship isn’t 50/50. It’s 100/100. You don’t get to do half. You have to do all and the other person does all also. Unless you can be as independent as a single woman, you will always be a burden on any partner who accepts you. Your failure to thrive as a single person indicates a future failure to carry your weight in a relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:05 PM
2

I know how you view them. You view them wrong. That’s why they don’t like you or give you what you want. How can you not see this?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:01 PM
3

I am 49 years old and I guess I have been living in a bubble because I have never seen a man so intent on ruining his own chances at happiness. It seems he can’t even imagine a world where he isn’t the ultimate victim. I’m so glad I’m old lol
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:00 PM
3

Do you believe that 55-75% of children are killed by their mothers? Like everywhere? In the whole world?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:07 PM
2

A man can dream, right? The problem is that he’s not dreaming, he’s just screaming at the internet “why can’t everything be the way I want it to be?!” I am a single woman who makes all my own money, does all the housework, and is raising great kids. I also have a ton of leisure time for the gym, motorcycle rides, brunches with my friends, and country dancing. I simply cannot understand why a man can’t accomplish the same thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:07 PM
2

There is your answer: treat a woman as well as her best friend does. Easy peasy (for women).
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:02 PM
2

I guess you’ll never be an independent man the way I am an independent woman. Must suck to have to rely on people you hate to succeed. I have a sneaking suspicion you’re never going to be happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:00 PM
3

Women don’t have to do anything to get laid except exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 01:59 PM
2

It’s truly incredible how you view women having just standard human rights as stealing something from you. Mind boggling to me. I don’t even know where to start with that belief.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 01:58 PM
4

You are both totally lost and giving advice. Which is it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:54 AM
6

Pretending to be a victim is a weird way to get laid.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:52 AM
–

Nothing. This man is just complaining that he can’t get laid but using way more words than necessary.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:51 AM
5

That is already inaccurate just in this conversation as I, personally, am both a feminist and have been a very active advocate for men’s rights in the area of bodily autonomy for almost 20 years. Why not just use the dictionary definition? You’re being petulant to get attention rather than actually engaging with intellectual honesty. You will never be at peace until you are honest.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:49 AM
6

If you want to be a stay at home parent, go make a bunch of money and then have a baby with a surrogate. Your goal is achievable without a woman at all. Why not be a man and go your own way to your dream life without waiting for a woman to carry you there?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:06 AM
5

My standards for the men who want to try dating me is exactly the standard my female friends have set. If a man can treat me as well as one of my besties, he can have a chance. So far, just a few takers. Seems like women set the standard so we get to hold it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 04:01 AM
3

There is, in fact, a very basic and well accepted definition of feminism. Feel free to use that one.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:59 AM
3

I’m curious which of your beliefs/values you consider red pill.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:57 AM
2

What? Can you translate this into English, please?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 03:55 AM
2

I forgot to mention, the one guy I met in Texas that I connected with is from France.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:57 AM
1

Agreed
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:42 AM
3

This has been my experience as a woman. Men match with me (over and over again throughout the years) and never finish a single conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:41 AM
1

I have heard a lot of this but about 80-90% of the men I match with send maybe two or three back and forth messages and then just disappear. I would think it was me but I am very warm and ask questions when I chat with them. They’re just too busy with their startup or whatever to message back. So, I get a ton of matches but for what?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:40 AM
2

Online dating has been a way for me to talk to and go on dates with well over a hundred men in the last eight years. In that time, I made one true heart connection that felt really profound but I still don’t know if it will go anywhere. The gift online dating has given me is the understanding that my person is NOT going to be from where I live. I was dragged to Texas by my ex husband 20 years ago and I love it here but my person doesn’t live in this town. I am 100% sure of it. So, thanks, online…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 02:37 AM
1

I agree that is not coercion. It is manipulation and an ultimatum though. It may also just be his personal preference to not go on a date with a woman who doesn’t want sex with him. That seems reasonable. If a man says to me “I am interested in sex” that’s one thing. That’s not what they say. They say “did you work out your booty at the gym today?”
/r/PurplePillDebate28/07/26 01:39 AM
6

Thank you for writing that while I was at the gym. It’s amazing to me that there are people who literally can’t imagine a world that isn’t the way the powers that be say.
/r/ExRedPill28/07/26 01:35 AM
4

Seriously. Just answer the question. Jeezuz. Why are there gender roles?
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 10:11 PM
5

This seems to be all of it right now. They’re throwing a collective temper tantrum and women and girls get hurt.
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 09:22 PM
4

You didn’t even come close to answering my question.
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 09:21 PM
1

That is your conclusion? What if mentioning it at all makes me uncomfortable?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 08:52 PM
2

Why accused of coercion? For being horny or for expressing it? Those aren’t the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 07:09 PM
2

I am actively working to become a problem to men like this. Doing my part, but still tired.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 05:56 PM
1

If you ONLY want sex in a relationship, lead with that. Otherwise, get to know a person before showing them your erection.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 05:39 PM
1

We know men are horny. This information is not hidden.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 05:37 PM
2

I blocked a guy because he asked in text before we had ever met what I was doing in the gym to get a “nice booty”? We are both gym rats and it seemed like a nice conversation until that moment. This guy was so hot. I would have absolutely (likely) wanted to start something with him if he hadn’t been gross on day one. I am so tired of men who seem want my body and express that to me freely. Don’t care, bro. Get in line. I don’t want to hear one word about sex until you’ve proven to me you have an…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 05:35 PM
1

I think people can figure out how they want the dates to be paid for. I’m old school. If a man asks to split the bill, I’ll pay the whole thing and block him.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 04:57 PM
6

What about red pill is true?
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 05:19 AM
7

Why are there gender roles?
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 04:48 AM
3

What is truer?
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 04:48 AM
11

Partnership is something you bring, not something you get just by existing.
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 04:48 AM
11

If I failed to go to college or make money and I saw people around me going to college and making money, why would I be mad at THEM? That’s what I don’t get. Women are doing great in many ways but that doesn’t mean men can’t accomplish the exact same thing if they try really hard and put in effort. Why be mad at anyone but themselves?
/r/ExRedPill27/07/26 04:47 AM
1

I am HFA. These are skills you can learn.
/r/ExRedPill21/07/26 12:54 AM
1

Have you considered that you aren’t doing the things to be a friend? Or perhaps it’s obvious that you’re just there to hit on people? I find it very hard to believe you can go hang out with these people regularly and not make a single friend.
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 09:25 PM
1

He goes to social events and doesn’t make friends. That means he’s being off putting. He also wants everyone else to do this work for him.
/r/ExRedPill20/07/26 09:24 PM
1

Be less creepy? I don’t know how you can go and be around people regularly and not make friends.
/r/ExRedPill19/07/26 12:12 AM
1

How come men don’t ask each other dating questions? I ask my girlfriends all the time.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/26 11:54 AM
2

Or, maybe women are meeting you and not liking you.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/26 12:46 AM
5

If you’re an engaging person that makes women feel deeply safe, you won’t have any trouble getting a date.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/26 12:45 AM
4

“I do not have the luxury to respect women and what they want. I don’t care that I make women uncomfortable. I am a man and I must have a woman right now.” - you.
/r/ExRedPill14/07/26 12:44 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.
created by /u/dream-hunter