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love_in_october Archive

View 3 posts and 2,950 comments by love_in_october on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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This is such a nothing statement as you don't know someone's personality unless you've known them for some time.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 06:41 PM

I strongly prefer those who are complementary and different to me. I don't really understand those who are attracted to people who are very similar to themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 02:09 PM

Being a man doesn't tell you how other people's minds work. You're not a mind reader. It might work that way for you, but you can only speak for yourself. Clearly it's not the case as there are gay men who have had sex with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 11:58 AM

That's gross. And as I said, I know him well, and you know him not at all (not even knowing it was me who came up to him), so why should I believe what you think of him?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 11:28 AM

I'm pretty sure that is the case. One man total has expressed interest in me, and being married to him, I know him rather well. But that's not an assumption I'd even have to make.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/07/26 11:21 AM
3

The country I'm in hasn't been invaded for centuries and hasn't had conscription since WW2 (even then you were allowed to object if you didn't want to go). The country I'm from has never had conscription. Only after any of this was any woman given so much as the right to vote. I don't know what things would look like if my country got invaded and I'm not basing my views on gender on guessing what will happen in an unlikely hypothetical that people only really think about to say "gotcha feminists…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 09:54 PM
4

It's pretty hard to build up romance or a relationship without consistent presence. And of course, if you're already into someone, you will want to be around them a lot. Who's going to choose someone who isn't there or who they don't want to be around? Presence is just a natural part of starting a relationship you want to be in.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 09:49 PM
3

You're leaving out the detail that male-targeted media generally puts men (or the character you're meant to put yourself in the shoes of) at the giving end of objectificatuon, sexual violence and whatever else, while female-targeted media generally puts women (or the character you're meant to put yourself in the shoes of) at the receiving end. We tend to be more sympathetic of people having a victim fantasy than a perpetrator fantasy for what I feel are obvious reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 09:47 PM
1

You're really not convincing me you can tell if someone is being bullied into sex if you're okay with apathetic consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 04:57 PM
0

If they're talking about this on a first date they're just crass. I don't want to date someone who's crass. They don't need to pretend anything, simply just don't bring it up because it's not appropriate.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 03:45 PM
1

If you're taking a yes after multiple nos to be enthusiastic consent, I don't think your communication skills are quite good enough for that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 03:36 PM
0

Why would I want someone who was aware of basic politeness and didn't tell people they'd met once how much they wanted to have sex with them? I do wonder. And I personally don't want someone who's mainly interested in interacting with me for sex, so there's that.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 03:29 PM
1

There are some thoughts that should be kept to yourself even if they aren't shameful. For example, if you don't like someone, that's fine, but don't say it to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 01:55 PM
3

In theory maybe. They don't actually choose that. And wealthier by how much?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:30 AM
5

Do you think poorer men are more likely to be liars?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:29 AM

The title said quite enough - where exactly did I specify I was talking specifically about Americans?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:28 AM
1

You can just admit you look down on certain careers. They're perfectly capable of doing these careers - I know plenty of people from studying at Oxford who've done minimum wage jobs just fine. You're saying you think they're not for smart people, who are just too good for it. You're talking about people having disabilities that make them incapable of manual labour, which obviously isn't the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:26 AM

For both men and women, asking out a friend is high risk high reward. It'd be an unusual person who's attracted to all their opposite-sex friends, so there are some who might be able to ask them out successfully, and others for whom this will ruin the friendship. "Friends first" often means "casual acquaintances first", or simply "can we get to know each other a bit before deciding to date", though. That's a lot less risky.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:22 AM

What is being used for sex then if consent means it doesn't count? Do you think it's the same as being raped? Being used means you consented to something you didn't want to do (at least, not if all the information had been available to you) and that doesn't advantage you. For example, if someone acted like they wanted to be your friend but really just wanted to get to know your cooler sister, and binned you once they had done so, you would feel pretty used, even if you technically consented to i…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:14 AM
1

Great idea in theory but you forget that this would mean neglecting their children who they love, it's not so simple as a strike at another job where you're just leaving clients to fend for themselves. If the dad doesn't step up straight away to care for these children, they've done something abusive and/or illegal.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:08 AM
2

I'm not sure if you're trying to agree or disagree with me.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:04 AM
1

Are they?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/07/26 08:04 AM
3

Will you say how?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:27 PM
1

I said that whatever evidence you're given you won't listen to. I didn't claim to find any. As I said, finding some wouldn't make a difference to your view, so I'm not bothering.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:26 PM
4

They show you were harmed by something or got in some accident. In modern times they are usually from medical procedures. They show inner mental strength and resilience. They show something else hurt you and you recovered. If they're from a fight, again, that usually means you lost and were most likely not the attacker. Usually we feel real empathy for those who were attacked, it can make scars on men or women seem like bravery badges.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:25 PM
5

Because women do nothing to help or protect others, in fact they just do nothing all day, apparently.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:22 PM
5

Aggressive? He didn't attack the dog. Putting up a defensive barrier is certainly not aggressive.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:21 PM
0

Did you read my comment?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:16 PM
1

The lower a man's income, the more sexual partners he has had, generally speaking.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:16 PM
2

Scars aren't an indicator of violence. In fact they show you lost against something (usually not a person) and that you suffered at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:14 PM
1

This is what we call an unfalsifiable claim, meaning that whatever evidence you're given that this isn't true you will reject (you will believe that any woman attracted to a man who isn't dominant and aggressive is actually lying to herself, others or both). Your tendency to believe that something is true in the face of any evidence renders your claim illogical and impossible to debate against. (We can argue however we want that women are attracted to men you think they shouldn't be but you will…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:09 PM
6

Oh really, there must be loads more female software engineers hired then?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:03 PM
6

Men will literally be created and raised by a woman and then say women didn't make anything (using female-invented WiFi on an app using female-invented computer code). They really just assume that everything was made by a man like women just sit there.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 10:01 PM
6

It's hypocritical to say you don't look down on doing something and then claim you're too good to do that thing, it's a waste of your talent and people who do it aren't compatible with you as you couldn't share ideas with them (because they're all so dumb, obviously).
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 09:59 PM
11

Such a system just isn't realistic. Women have never earned more than men on average, and they tend to prefer assortative mating, dating people in the same income bracket. Even if they did somehow ended up earning a lot more than men on average, there's no reason to believe they wouldn't just adjust and usually end up dating men who earned less. The graduate job market sucks currently for men and women, you often need to take whatever job you can get even if you feel you're too good for it. Unem…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 09:50 PM

They're not viewed as negative, just not attractive. For example, straight women don't date women, but don't see being female as negative. Most people don't date people very far in age from themselves, but don't see that as negative either. I see serving in the army as something commendable, but I wouldn't date a soldier as we don't have compatible lifestyles. I think playing sport is great but sporty people just aren't my type to date. And so on. Attraction is different from just finding someth…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 03:13 PM
0

Women have to prepare for a potentially much more negative reaction when they approach. Men can find being approached by a woman they don't like incredibly offensive and react very badly. Men also would complain about having to wait to be approached, as it won't happen as often as they want, when they want or with the kind of people they want. Approaching let's them control all this.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 03:07 PM
1

Society isn't structured around who is afraid of whom in a one-on-one encounter. I don't get any more power in society just because I don't fear this.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 03:04 PM
1

Could you at least attempt to engage with the actual points I brought up rather than something different?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 11:58 AM
3

Women who were less selective presumably had more children (as they weren't waiting about and turning down options rather than conceiving) and therefore had more chances to pass on their genes. Women who approached more would've had more chances to get pregnant.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 06:18 AM
1

Having a bit more physical strength doesn't really change anything here.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 06:11 AM
1

What do you think it is, a gang of men beating people up?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 06:10 AM
1

Women make up the state and police too. Being able to beat people up better with bare hands is pretty useless these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/07/26 06:09 AM
1

With what, brute force?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 08:41 PM
6

Why assume that men still have the ability to control women into doing whatever they want? The advantage they had was brute force, but that hasn't been the deciding factor of power for a long time.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 05:41 PM

A substantial number of men say they prefer substantially younger women and that they feel they're desired more by these women than those their own age. Often, they're just choosing to ignore the obvious.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 05:35 PM
14

Most mums work full time. Assuming they don't work and therefore having higher expectations of them is just sexist. Mums are also more likely to be raising their children alone or with a custody arrangement the bulk of the work (weekdays vs weekends) than dads, but nobody is using that to have lower expectations of mums.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/07/26 08:58 AM
1

So you've definitely never planned a wedding. "Nice classy" is usually the same cost but different style.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 08:03 PM
1

Yeah, right. Men don't usually want sad, pathetic weddings with no guests.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:08 PM
2

But gender is just a social construct. If you take away the roles, there's nothing left. Just doing what works for you is not a gender.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 04:56 PM
2

So you go grocery shopping for fun because picking groceries is so fun?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 01:46 PM
2

Do you go grocery shopping for fun?
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:13 AM
0

They're both deciding. If he decides he likes her choice, that is still very much his own choice. His opinion is given just as much weight, even if he chooses not to have much of one. And again, that's if it's true (and true for every couple somehow). Estate agents are known for talking absolute rubbish.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:12 AM
3

Technically nobody is stopped from doing anything so long as it isn't impossible. When someone says they're stopped from doing something they mean it has negative consequences that aren't worth it. I'm guessing you've never been bullied to be so dismissive of its effects.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:09 AM
2

Sex is an activity for two. If one person is getting off and then the other is getting themselves off, I'm not sure that either of them are getting much out of it they wouldn't get from masturbating on their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:05 AM
3

If you are seen as masculine as a woman you are at increased risk of bullying, assault, workplace discrimination, etc.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:03 AM
2

And, if true, that wouldn't mean he had any less of a choice in the matter. Deciding you don't care and want to go along with someone else is a choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 09:01 AM
6

Social roles and expectations exist outside their parents' house. Nobody really gets to do whatever they want.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:26 AM
5

In a post gender society you wouldn't have a gender identity. Nobody would. It would remove the problem in a different way.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:25 AM
4

And often they are similar amounts of masculine or feminine. Many people simply don't care about masculine or feminine when it comes to attraction, they are attracted to other things instead.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:24 AM
2

Bring the same gender doesn't make two people the same. They can be complete opposites.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 07:22 AM
1

Weddings take a lot of work and stress. Often men don't like to get into the planning that much, they just ask their future spouse to create a nice wedding with minimal effort from them. They get what they want without having to bother themselves with creating the details of their experience. Buying toilet paper isn't hard but it is dull and takes time to buy regularly and mental effort to keep track of the levels of this and every other household supply, so like any other household chore. You'r…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:57 AM
2

House buying is almost never the decision of just one person. Both people will be involved.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/07/26 06:53 AM
2

Sorry, I'm too young to have a clue how cheques work. Or what you would buy using them in 2026.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:00 PM
3

It's not really a privilege to make meaningless decisions that have really already been made for you. It's just a chore. You can address any chore as you wish. It's not meaningful choice. And that's what I'm saying, doing household groceries is not really controlling money.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:07 PM
5

Do you think I was trying to complain about it? My point was it's hardly like doing that chore gives you so much more financial choice or privilege than your partner who you are doing it for, to help them. It is in fact a chore.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 05:39 PM

If you don't find someone your own age worth it, someone half your age definitely won't be.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 05:20 PM

That 1% chance, if you were to get it, wouldn't make you happy.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 04:51 PM
9

It's not really much of a choice or power, you're doing a chore. It's like saying cooking the meals is a privilege because you get to choose how your food is cooked. Going to and from the supermarket and keeping track of what's needed are the more annoying parts, and if you're only going for a fifteen-minute shop each time you're probably going daily which just eats up time and gets boring. You don't really get to pick that much even if you find someone much joy in toilet paper brands (probably …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 04:06 PM
5

Again, your feelings towards this are not the norm.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:57 PM
6

You are a rare kind of person. Couldn't you just tell your partner what brand you like?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:50 PM

I have kept saying younger women don't want them and it's met with nothing but resistance. It's not cosmic injustice when it happens, but it's usually a miserable relationship. There are worse things than not finding someone.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:48 PM
17

Do you want the privilege of picking between toilet paper brands every time they need picked? Does going to the supermarket or homeware shop excite you? If you love groceries go do them, you'll be doing someone a favour. Most people just don't find home essentials as exciting as you do. Men whose wives are buying things usually are picking what to spend money on, and then saying "please can you buy some more bedsheets darling".
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 01:45 PM
11

It's generally household money that belongs to both of them. She's paying with her own card usually, which will be from her personal or joint account. As breadwinner, she will have put the majority of the money into that account.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 12:00 PM
3

It's controlling and abusive for your partner to get groceries and sort out the bills? Must every couple do these things together always? God forbid someone do a chore for you.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 11:58 AM
2

Generally when you "self-inflict" doing someone a favour, that's considered an act of generosity, something you should be thanked for.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 09:09 AM
9

I should be accountable for things I did not say? Is there anything you found unclear in my post? I'd be happy to explain, rephrase?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 09:00 AM
6

If you're asking where do kinks come from, it's an interesting question but we don't actually know for sure. We just know they exist. If control is needed for violence, then I suppose you can inflict pain without violence.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:12 AM
5

So now you're getting further from the point, which was specifically about what breadwinners do.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:10 AM
5

What am I not understanding about the difference between a premise and conclusion? What data sets are you talking about?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 08:07 AM
8

I didn't say anything to do with good, bad, right, wrong, or any synonyms. I simply did not speak on the topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:43 AM
8

Decision fatigue is a thing and doing household admin for your partner is generally considered to be doing them a favour.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:43 AM
8

A premise is part of an argument. An argument consists of one or more premises that lead to a conclusion. If you want to dismiss the conclusion, you can either argue against a premise or against the reasoning used to say the premises lead to the conclusion. Men most likely do less housework when they are single as 1) some of their housework is done by (usually female) family members, especially their mums, 2) they pay to outsource it more, and 3) they're less likely to be living with children or…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:41 AM
19

If men are eleven years behind, how are they ready to consent to anything at the same age as women? They just develop enough to do things they want to do, but not enough to do things they don't want to do? Sure, they can be turned on by violence. That doesn't mean there needs to be a power imbalance. Someone can be completely in control of the violence they're receiving - you can tell someone to hit you and control if/when it happens. Doesn't really work when it comes to porn - once a video is o…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:26 AM
9

I didn't say anyone was bad, or make any normative claim for that matter. You're making your own conclusion about certain things being good or bad.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:20 AM
7

It's a premise, not a point I'm arguing. Premises are indeed just things you assert without giving a reason because making every argument from first principles is unreasonable. If you want to argue against that premise you can try to, but you're not going to find any evidence that male breadwinners do more or equal household chores to female breadwinners. We don't know how much of a say people have in financial decisions. Generally, measures of who makes these decisions just ask who spends the m…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 07:11 AM
17

What is it with people just naming fallacies and then resting on their laurels as if they've argued a point? If you want to accuse my reasoning of being circular, you will need to explain why.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:58 AM
35

You're forgetting that most "financial decisions" aren't leisure spending but groceries and other necessities. Most expenses will be shared expenses, so who's spending the money within a couple is more a matter of who's doing the shopping chores. (As women earn less than men especially at the top end, female breadwinners are likely to earn less than male breadwinners and have less left over for themselves or their partners to spend on leisure, making this more pronounced in these arrangements.) …
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:53 AM
43

With all due respect, you're 47 and still single and they're telling you what you can do to avoid being single for the rest of your life. You're really unlikely to attract anyone outside of your age bracket, and basically everyone in your age bracket who wants to date has done so already and has probably has divorced by now. That's your dating pool, take it or leave it. At your big age, being manipulated is kind of on you, you have decades of life experience and the ability to make your own mind…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:35 AM
5

I was told once I had to support women dating "older men" as my husband is older than me. He is two months older...
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:22 AM
1

And? People from Northern Ireland don't need to stay in Northern Ireland, just like people from your county don't need to stay there and are largely going to wind up near the place where they grew up. It's even something you can plan for to get more family support with your children.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/07/26 06:17 AM
-1

I'm from Northern Ireland (although I don't live there). It's not exactly "vigorous" to take care of a toddler when you have nothing else to do. It's not like you get right onto your deathbed at retirement age. In most places, people tend to live close to their parents and where they grew up. Maybe they'll move from a city to a nearby town or village or the other way, but it's not the norm to move much further.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 04:14 PM
-1

Where do you live that people usually live so far from their parents and people have no energy after 65?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 02:47 PM
1

As I said, maybe it's cultural.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 12:03 PM
3

I'm not sure if this is a cultural thing or not but this is generally where grandparents can come in.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/07/26 10:17 AM
1

So we're meant to put trust in (at least) third-hand stories that fuel an agenda.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 09:49 PM
1

I have scrolled. You haven't proven it true, and can't because it's not. You were the one who specifically claimed it happens to men more. Imagine if someone was talking about something affecting Asians and you jumped in to say "um actually, it happens to white people more". Even if true, it's derailing from the focus and rightfully you can be told to go talk about that somewhere else if you even genuinely care.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 09:47 PM
1

I'm just wondering how you've managed to encounter so many personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:07 PM
0

How many different anecdotes do you have about horrible women?!
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 06:16 PM
2

What would competing even look like? I don't think there's a meaningful way of competing to make someone like you. Even having one man interested in me at a time is miraculous enough, you can't very well compete without someone to compete with. Well, they're competing with peace and quiet I suppose.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 04:30 PM
1

What the parent comment was that you responded to. In the exchange you posted it's indicated that you're derailing in some way, but you have not posted the beginning. Am I supposed to not believe the thing you showed me and wanted me to believe? I think you are omitting, which is self-evident really. I never accused you of lying. If you're going to take people disagreeing with you as a personal attack constantly, may I suggest not posting on a debate forum?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:50 AM
1

You purposely have not included it in your screenshot. I never talked about you being sexually assaulted so not sure how I could be minimising it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:37 AM
1

You've left out the original context, and I'm guessing it's relevant giving how the other user is referring to it. You've responded to a post about female victims by talking about male victims as a gotcha, haven't you?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:36 AM
1

Your colleague's situation sounds terrifying, they likely don't have a healthy or happy relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:22 AM
1

I've only seen it used on this subreddit as a gotcha, not discussed in a serious way that indicates caring about any victims. Might be the reason. Edit: I believe the user I was conversing with, who has repeatedly accused me of shutting them down, has blocked me so I can't reply. Take that as you will.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 11:20 AM
1

If they're cute, but they're not considered cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 09:53 AM
1

Women that men find unattractive usually aren't counted by them when they're talking about women.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 09:52 AM
0

Exactly what did you think was going to happen when inserting yourself into a conversation about female victims of rape and making the (false) claim that men are more frequently victims and can't we think about the poor men? It's just not the time or place, imagine if you were talking about male victims and someone butted in to say you should be talking about women actually.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:56 AM
4

You should respect it just as you respect any other decision (say someone you actually respect, like a male friend, says he doesn't want to go on holiday with you or something) - she has said no, that means no and she most likely won't change her mind. Every decision that's made is influenced by emotions and mood as that's just the human condition but that doesn't make it any less of a decision or means it can be changed if you don't like it. There's no use in continuing to pester her about it a…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:51 AM
1

Just listening when someone speaks isn't "making them happy" and takes barely any effort. You might as well say you're expecting physical labour from women in return for existing, that would be more honest. You can't threaten me with hookup culture. That doesn't mean I would want to be in a one-sided relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:43 AM
1

Meaning I could have any kind of personality and behave any kind of way.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/07/26 08:40 AM
2

If you want to date, find someone who doesn't consider it a problem. Perhaps a similarly overlooked and inexperienced woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 10:07 PM
2

That's not how anyone else read it. Dating a woman is not for "helping you with your inexperience", you date someone because you want to date them rather than as some training exercise like they're a starter girlfriend ready to discard. This man could date a woman he actually likes and wants to be with rather than simply trying to gain "experience".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 10:01 PM
3

The post is describing men who want to get a relationship and just use it as practice. It's solely focused on sneaky men.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 09:46 PM
3

So just because someone listens, you should do physical work for them? Would you take that deal, do you think it's fair for you to physically care for someone that just for listening sometimes? I really don't care if someone random stranger I don't want to date or fuck threatens to be my fuck buddy.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:57 PM
2

So you don't know me, like at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:55 PM
1

And what is yours in return?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:56 PM
2

Probably. I only do that like maybe a couple of times a year as is.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:55 PM
3

I don't think anyone ever needs that "critique" really. Either they know and don't need a reminder or don't know and won't accept it. If you feel the need to say it, it's really just to gloat and kick someone when they're down.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 06:46 PM
2

Daily? That's vanishingly many. Not that "listening to problems" is very helpful, it isn't doing anything.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:33 PM
3

I'm aware that many men are open to their first partner being their last. I'm married to one. But your post isn't describing these men.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 05:08 PM
4

Women, especially inexperienced women, are often just fine with being men's first everything, but it's being that "angelic girl" that's just a stepping stone to "momentum" with multiple/hotter women that's off-putting. If you're not open to your first everything also being your last everything then many of those women just won't bother, and you're not really getting a real relationship "experience" either with one foot out the door.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:43 PM
2

You claimed that Pew Research said something vague yet won't clarify what. Maybe you'd be better off posting a link rather than trying to summarise as I still don't know who you're referring to or much else. I didn't claim statistics existed. I assume you know what sexual harassment is.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 03:23 PM
3

I prefer him to make noises, I just don't care how masculine or feminine these noises supposedly sound.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:57 PM
2

No, but what does it actually show? Who is harassed? In what way are they harassed? I thought it was obvious it's generally sexual harassment.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:56 PM
1

I think you'll find things to be rather different if/when you have sex. Anyway, it's my preference. If he is quiet that is not my preference.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:49 PM
2

Pew Research shows what? Women aren't punished for being submissive to men. They're punished for being anything else. No clue what this donkey business is supposed to be about.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 02:47 PM
12

Men "don't mind" having to care for or nurture their partners because to them it's a novelty to do only occasionally, not a constant thing. When it is a constant thing, such as when their partners are long term sick, they tend to leave rather than look after them, and if they stay they will generally get a carer or female family member to do it. If your partner is constantly expecting you to show all this love and caring to them and not doing the same for you despite being perfectly capable, it …
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 01:08 PM
1

This has never happened to me. At most, I have had a fleeting feeling that someone looks nice, but they're a stranger, so I'm not that involved and certainly not getting turned on or thinking about sex with them. All I even know about them is how they look today, that's not going to create a feeling that's that deep.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:33 AM
1

2 and/or 3, whatever comes naturally to him.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/07/26 07:31 AM
1

But in this case it makes no sense. We're talking about women wearing makeup, which men don't do. In no case is it going to be helpful. I suppose being human is required for any human to make any choice, but saying "because they're human" or "because they're not dead" or whatever other nonsense is not a meaningful reason why they made that choice over another.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 09:31 PM
1

"She's a normal human woman" is not a cause or explanation at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 07:26 PM
2

And should we bury our heads in the sand about why one choice usually works well for women and another choice usually works well for men? Acting due to patriarchy is not praised. (The opposite does happen, actually.) It just is. It's just something that frames choices, it doesn't make them any better. All choices, including bad ones, have reasons.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 06:52 PM
3

Two different ways of trying to get a certain kind of information that neither method will get perfectly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 06:42 PM
5

Why do any studies on people ever do anything other than ask survey questions if they think people understand themselves? People lie, have different definitions for the same thing, don't want to answer embarrassing questions, just haven't been in a given situation so can't answer a hypothetical accurately, etc. Other measures may be more appropriate or objective.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 06:18 PM
4

And men just so happen to all have unique special individual reasons that are unrelated to anything external, yet basically every man has them? Either you're speaking in incredibly bad faith or you haven't thought this through as your original comment was an emotional knee jerk reaction. I don't wear makeup.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:47 PM
3

In fact she told him beforehand.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:24 PM
5

If you have no idea why, why are you claiming to know and dismissing my reasoning?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:24 PM
3

So why do most women just so happen to want to wear makeup while nearly all men just so happen to not want to wear makeup? Coincidence?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 03:06 PM
3

You're not a "hive mind" just because you're affected by your environment. Obviously there are reasons why you want to do something or don't, you don't just get random urges out of nowhere. Your choices aren't just random and detached from everything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 02:54 PM
5

You said you dated her for at least six months.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 02:39 PM
2

It makes sense if you consider people can change and learn things, for example that they don't like something. Making a bad decision once doesn't mean you must repeat it forever. What's the other conclusion, that they just hated you in particular (despite choosing to date you) so decided to deprive themselves of things they totally enjoyed out of spite?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:34 PM
13

She's choosing not to continue to punish herself by doing something she doesn't want. I'm sorry that someone not doing something that they don't like for you and being upfront about it while you choose to remain in this situation feels like punishment to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:32 PM
2

I definitely would read those choices as submissive if anything. You might just not be reading the women you meet right. There's a very low success rate on apps, especially if you're looking for women as there are so few women using them.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:17 PM
2

Aren't chokers more of a submissive thing? My husband and I worked each other out just reading each others vibe, but idk how it would work when meeting on an app. But my general advice is not to try to find dates on apps.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:10 PM
1

Even vanilla women are perfectly willing and able to change tyres, investigate noises, deal with emergencies, and provide their own resources.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 01:00 PM
2

It's not for you, but women who are into submissive men don't tend to find masculinity particularly attractive.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 12:57 PM
2

You really really do not want to be saying that you like submissive men as a woman with your name attached to it. The levels of harassment can be unreal. Makes it hard to find a submissive partner. It's mostly a matter of being lucky.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 12:54 PM
1

Like an hour is reasonable but I'd expect it'd be immediate. it's not like it takes long or has any prep time. If he asked me to take the bin out I'd have it done in that time too, same for a similar small task like making a cup of tea. Five hours is pretty unreasonable. I don't need to ask though. He has eyes.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 12:11 PM
13

Your choices are shaped by the society that you live in and the way you brought up. Yes, people still have choice, but it's not completely free and autonomous. For example, why do most women and basically no men make the "choice" to wear makeup? It's not like there's anything inherent to female biology that makes you want to paint your face. Men are usually brought up being taught not to wear makeup and that there isn't anything wrong with their natural face. If they wear it they usually receive…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/07/26 12:02 PM
1

It stops some men, probably, but not all.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 12:49 PM
7

Absolutely not, for safety reasons. You won't know who you're talking to. Anonymity without even attaching a picture would likely lead to even more sexual harassment on the app.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 11:27 AM

Women have always worked, the only difference has been what work they have been permitted to do and what pay and employment rights they have received. Women never fought to work, they were already working and have fought for equal workers' rights including pay. And no need to get on a high horse about women thinking housework and childcare are "beneath them". At least they begrudgingly do it while men are more likely to turn their noses up completely.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 08:23 AM
1

Women crush on their friends often. They are less likely to tell their friends about their feelings though. All these "explanations" of women's attraction do is attempt to make it seem more complicated by describing attraction in its broadest, most general form for men, yet zooming in on a way that only certain women experience attraction and claiming this is a rule for all women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/07/26 06:59 AM
6

So you have no clue how much money women actually have to spend on these.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 07:31 PM
1

I don't think you understood what I wrote.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 03:35 PM
1

I'm saying men have at least equal input if not more in house buying. It's true they don't care so much or participate in the majority of consumer decisions because the majority of consumer decisions are groceries and buying them is a chore women mainly do, but that's not the same as buying a house. In what way do men self sacrifice?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:19 PM
5

If it's no effort then surely men shouldn't be finding it hard to do it equally?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:15 PM
1

In buying houses?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 02:10 PM
1

Men have at least an equal say in buying homes and adopting pets, they're just less likely to be involved in the less important, more frequent things like what brand of toothpaste to buy.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 01:09 PM
4

It suits men well to act like the household work women do is unnecessary and they don't care whether it's done, then it can seem like it's just optional for women to do and they're not obliged to participate. I don't think they do it on purpose and they convince themselves of this but it is a big fat lie. Men are not happy when standards slip (this becomes quite obvious when their partners go away for a while, get sick or are simply busy for an extended period of time). They want to wear clean c…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 01:06 PM
3

It gives you more options who don't like you very much and think that other women are better than you and will view you as only a "basic woman" (like a starter home pretty much, just there until they can upgrade), which isn't the greatest foundation for a lasting relationship or even your personal sense of worth.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 08:34 AM
19

You know why they are doing all that spending? It's actually because of other chores women usually do! Most consumer spending is on groceries, bills and other essentials, and women are usually in charge of acquiring them for their families. The things they buy will usually need to be to their partner's taste as well. Their money for leisure purchases for themselves is usually less than men's and most people can't afford to outsource household chores anyway. (I know a couple of people with cleane…
/r/PurplePillDebate14/07/26 08:25 AM
6

You seriously don't think women don't get asked for favours? I'd say it's more frequent because we're expected to be generous and giving with our time, and a bit of an easy target. Women definitely get targeted more by random people on the street asking for money. At least you're expressing interest in dating someone before being asked for these things. Also you can just deny doing someone a favour. It's not like sexual assault, the "equivalent" to that would be robbery where things are just tak…
/r/PurplePillDebate13/07/26 06:55 PM
6

They know their partners are cheating?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:31 PM
6

Women are judged strongly for doing this too, I guess men don't really hear about it and just assume it doesn't happen though (even when they themselves are participating in the judging). As an example, if a woman says she doesn't like her partner watching porn she gets crucified. If anyone, male or female, implies their partner is cheating in any way it basically always causes a big argument for obvious reasons. So many men and women will just not bring it up if they think there is probably no …
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:20 PM
3

And what does "lowering your standards" look like practically speaking?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 03:18 PM
13

If you exclude those who are coerced or are in serious financial need, there's barely anyone left. Only very very top earners can earn millions from it, usually if already famous.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 11:31 AM
17

There are lots of men pimping women out and pushing them into it. And the men and women who post on these sites wouldn't be driven to do so if there was no market, which is almost exclusively male. It's completely optional to buy such things, whereas on the other side people who sell usually do it out of desperation for the money (no, not greed, someone who doesn't really need the money isn't going to do something degrading for it).
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 10:53 AM
24

It's men who are creating a market for buying bodies and putting people in these situations. That's worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 10:40 AM
8

Nobody, male or female, of any kind of look or rating is thinking "my ideal partner is as average as possible, if I find them too attractive then I don't want to date them".
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 10:35 AM
3

Nope, it was posted at 7:30!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 09:31 AM
14

Even thinking about the content disgusts me.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 09:30 AM

I think you're trying to compare erotic books/books with erotic scenes to video porn rather than "women's" and "men's" porn. I'd say there's less of an impact of problematic things in written material because: 1) No real people, including voice actors, are having to act it out or being exploited by porn companies. 2) Video content tends to be more influential and addictive than written. People consciously or subconsciously think it's real (much of it is marketed as being "real couples" and not a…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/07/26 09:28 AM
1

You're describing emotional weakness actually.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 11:43 PM
1

What adult wants to be loved like a puppy, because they're a "cute little thing"? That's condescending and vomit inducing, definitely not a good thing but thankfully I don't think it's that common. Men do not generally sacrifice themselves to protect women. They usually put themselves first when in emergency situations. Men certainly like to think of themselves as doing brave and noble things but you don't get any credit for doing something in a hypothetical situation.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 10:09 AM

I don't think it's some kind of revelation. Most people have a good idea of whether they want marriage and children since they're teenagers. But if you find you haven't got there by the time you're thirty you'll want to be more intentional about it. People often even plan to wait to do it around thirty so they're not desperate at all when it comes around, it was what they wanted.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/07/26 09:39 AM
3

We don't need to bring back war, hunting, killing and protecting your family from another tribe. (Men are absolutely not made to lead. The nature of groups is that you only get one leader, not half the group all taking a turn.) Men and women used to have to do all kinds of unpleasant things they don't any more. This is a good thing if you want to do crazy modern things like have free time and survive to middle age. It's great we don't have so many great ordeals and we have a concept of caring fo…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:42 PM

And that makes them better? My husband is shorter than me, does that make me better than other people somehow? Should we really be calling people better or worse than others depending on superficial traits of those they choose to date? And I tend to be of the opinion that no race or nationality is better than another, crazy I know.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/07/26 04:38 PM
6

Often the women who say things like this were pushed into marriage themselves, by their partner, family, or both. You're wrong to assume women always want it more than their partners.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:54 PM
1

It doesn't represent women, it represents women's rights. It doesn't reflect women's actions or aim to.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:44 PM
1

Veganism is a movement for nonhuman animals, yet vegans can be human.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:18 PM
2

Say yes when I ask him out, hopefully. He can just exist and I will handle the rest.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 01:07 PM
3

You're arguing for children's grannies, aunts and probably also stepmums having primary custody, not their dads.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:49 AM
2

Every body is different, and many bodies aren't helped by "default" sex giving little to know attention to their main sexual pleasure point.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:44 AM
1

Most men definitely don't prefer it. You get pushback from doing these things as a woman. It's often even treated as some kind of attack on masculinity or something.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/07/26 05:41 AM
6

I like making the first move and having more of a say in big and small relationship decisions. I don't know why anyone wouldn't want control over this. I enjoy paying for and treating my partner to things. Asking for marriage was possibly the best moment of my life, not some burden. And less housework and career sacrifice expectations by default would be awesome.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:45 PM

I've got to say, his lack of participation in his children's lives isn't going to convince anyone of his character.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:43 PM

Immediate no from me. I don't want children.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/07/26 05:36 PM
1

They were responding to a claim about what feminists support by mentioning something done by a different group who were not pushing statistical parity or equity.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 08:24 AM
0

Feminists =! women.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:32 AM
2

This is all well and good to say in a hypothetical, but you don't know but you don't know what you would actually do in those situations. Are you expecting praise for something you haven't done and, at a guess, will never do? You know why the "women and children" thing on the Titanic got so famous? It was considered remarkable, as usually in maritime disasters there were very few female or child survivors, who got trampled by escaping men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:28 AM
5

They didn't implement "women and children". They implemented adequate numbers of life boats. Every individual had a way to evacuate so no decisions needed to be made about who could or should. The Titanic was really just an exception.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:22 AM
1

They just get stuck at particular relationship milestone. They like that person and don't want to leave, and it's not like people don't progress into relationships after being in situationships for a bit. And sometimes women are the people causing the holdups.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:14 AM
4

Everyone learns from experience what they like and don't like. Unless you ignore these likes and dislikes, it means your sexual experience should improve over time. This is something I've experienced only having one partner. It's not something you need to worry about unless you don't want to have sex the way your partner likes or they don't want to have it the way you like, but that sexual incompatibility would still be there even if you didn't already know about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 07:12 AM

Not that I know celebrities or anything but I'm guessing she may have had surgery too. Also, she's a celebrity. And only one person.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:35 AM

Better than you're letting on I'd imagine.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:32 AM
1

Why are you bringing this up here?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/07/26 06:32 AM
1

You realise my original point was that women avoid such situations, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:02 PM

Men might say they don't like makeup but then the women they say look attractive are wearing it, and women who don't wear it (including the same woman they called attractive before) they call unattractive. If we listen to men, we must assume they do like makeup, but either don't know what it looks like or don't like the idea of makeup and want a makeup look to be achieved naturally somehow. They're probably not lying intentionally, they are just not very knowledgeable about makeup. Women who say…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:56 PM
1

Yes. It's very hard to represent yourself on an app, if they like me when actually meeting me that's what counts.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:50 PM
2

My guess is it could be based on just one, or even someone claiming a woman said something.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:48 PM
7

It doesn't even have to be divorce. You can just decide you don't want to share your money one day. You don't even need to pay a notice period.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:13 PM
7

But you heard someone say something once and that overrules reality I guess.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:10 PM
1

I'm not talking about states, don't live in one.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:09 PM
3

There is a difference between being allowed to access someone else's money and having your own money that only you can access. Separate bank accounts are also very common in marriages, only one shared account in a couple is not the norm any more. You don't have a legal right to any of your spouse's assets unless you divorce. During the marriage they are completely entitled to control all of it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:08 PM
8

So you don't think they're entitled to pay. Let's stop pretending it is pay then. It's not socially enforced. You just don't get these things. Husband's basically never given their wives money which they have some access to that is above minimum wage. If it was actually pay, it would be illegal withholding of wages.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:57 PM
11

Love. And somebody has to do it. She has been socialised that it's the price for a relationship. Women don't really get a choice, most have to have a job and the majority of housework. Feminists have not asked for pay. Nobody has. Just some understanding and not being kicked in the face by laws, finances and the employment market as thanks. If she gets held accountable, shouldn't it be in terms of thanking and praising her for this generous contribution to her family and society?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:50 PM
17

I hate this idea that when a couple has money it all becomes the man's. "She took half my money" - it wasn't yours to begin with, she has a job too.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:46 PM
20

You cannot be telling me you seriously think most married women keep all their earnings to themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 06:45 PM
36

She is not being paid. Her pay doesn't scale with the amount of work she does or how well she does it. If you work it out hourly, it may be less than minimum wage. It will almost certainly be less than the market value of this work. She may be earning negative money. Women who earn more than their husbands still usually do more unpaid labour. She doesn't get holiday pay, maternity leave, discrimination protections or anything in this work. She can be dismissed at any time for any reason and will…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 05:18 PM

I really don't think women are reluctant to do less work.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 02:40 PM
1

Those men are unicorns, most would see no point in trying to look. Women who want to be parents kind of have to accept what they will have to do, like it or not, before they even find someone to do it with. There's no reason to believe that currently single men would be any better at any of this than currently partnered men, other than the general fallacy I see reasonably often on this subreddit of assuming single men are just better at most things.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 10:34 AM
3

You have heard of harassment? It's not like a group of men are going to make women comfortable.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 09:35 AM
3

Are you serious?
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 08:12 AM
7

A parent's partner is one of, if not the, most likely people to harm a child. A lot of women know of this danger and won't date when they have children on purpose.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:22 AM
3

I don't spend time learning about "men", same as I don't spend time learning about "women". I learn about people and get to know particular men and women same as everyone else. Any information about what men do or women do is usually inaccurate and sexist. Unless I have specifically asked for feedback on something, which could be a man or a woman, I don't change what I do based on other people's opinions, as I can make my own mind up and I don't value criticism that isn't asked for. I have gone …
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:16 AM
2

You're taking this hypothesis as absolute truth, and also as something more extreme than it claims to be. It doesn't say that women are all the same while men never have anything in common. It says women's traits are a bit more likely to be closer to a mean than men's, but both still vary significantly. Whether it's true or not, every person is still different from the next with an at least slightly different mix of traits, this is true of men and women. Obviously, women have different personali…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:10 AM

I know bad people exist, and that they exist everywhere, not just on dark paths or at parties. The people most dangerous to me are those I already know, but it does nobody any good to dwell on that. You're not responsible for what other people do to you, actually, and these measures are more for reassurance than actual safety anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:03 AM

So paranoia of the only way that's right. Got it.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:01 AM
3

We don't know. They didn't meet earlier. It's not like she personally rejected him when she didn't even know he existed.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/07/26 07:00 AM
1

If it's just for sex a couple of times, convenience and can you tolerate having sex with them are often the only considerations. It's not like you have to live with them or have children or see their face every day. Most women haven't even had casual sex, never mind with a specific kind of man. Not that how they look is going to make it feel any better, they don't know each other so the sex will be mediocre at best.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 09:04 PM
2

If you plan to have sex with someone repeatedly, how much you want to have sex with them is much more important than if you only plan to do it once or twice.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 07:53 PM
5

They're still going to be pickier about who they stay with for longer. And casual sex is still going to feel worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 07:11 PM
6

Most women don't like casual sex, if she's even had it to begin with beating her casual sex partners should be easy.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 05:29 PM
2

Living with someone shows a whole other side to them, you see who they are 24/7 and know how managing a household together will actually work rather than just promises and hypotheticals. It takes a lot longer to get to know someone when you just meet up occasionally and you mainly see the best side of them. Jumping into marriage without really knowing what it will look like from that perspective is a huge risk. If a couple is looking to marry, it doesn't need to be an indefinite length - living …
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 05:22 PM
1

Then find or make one for men like these women made groups. Or just post anyway if the group doesn't say it's just for women. I'm just saying it's not a common thing to do. Lots of lonely, friendless women out there, and not a lot of women making friends off Facebook.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 09:38 AM
1

Why is this on your feed? Housing groups fair enough, lots of men and women needing and looking for housemates. Meeting actual friends off Facebook is not normal at all. Have you tried making some posts if this is so successful or responding to other people's posts?
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 09:07 AM
2

No, I actually feel that many men would consider me incompatible because I just don't want to have sex until I know them well. I'm not restraining myself from anything because I don't want it.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 08:52 AM
7

You really think women make friends by posting on Facebook like some kind of bat signal? Nobody does that, it's weird, it's not safe and nobody is going to actually want to meet up in person. No idea how you've apparently seen hundreds (or what kind of groups you're spending hours in on Facebook). The way you describe men making friends somewhere new seems pretty typical for women too, except women usually have additional safety worries on top of the shared worry of looking awkward.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/07/26 08:48 AM

I don't know why your female friends do this more than your male ones but I would assume it is due to your treatment of them or who you pick to befriend in some way.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:48 PM

How are we supposed to tell you what you're doing when all you've said is "I don't think I'm doing anything"? You'll need to reflect a little more on what you may be doing rather than jumping to thinking it's everyone else who's the problem. I doubt you treat men and women exactly the same, nobody does. Nobody's going to be able to fix your friendship issues with such little information though.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:23 PM
3

There isn't very much of any research into any specifically red pill beliefs.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:19 PM
2

Any of them, really.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:14 PM
3

I'm not sure what you're trying to ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 08:51 PM
7

It is unfalsifiable the way it's put. Any relationship that goes against these beliefs, you can claim there's not true desire there. None of these things mean they're not desired, it's not like your spouse can only desire you if you're worse than them in every way.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 08:51 PM
10

They didn't see them as real? Where on earth is this coming from? Anyway, seems you're putting on conditions. Seems you think women should be below a certain age and in their first relationship (or even first sexual encounter) to be loved. Otherwise they might have given attention to someone else before and how dare they!
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 07:35 PM
21

Do you not see the irony in claiming that women are loved unconditionally and yet men are supposedly rejecting women for being the same age as them and not dating them at a time they hadn't yet met? Nobody is loved unconditionally except perhaps by their parents, and it's never been a better time for men to not need to provide for their partner to find love. Most women have jobs and would like to continue doing so, they don't need "providers" and can care about luxuries like what their partner i…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:45 PM
26

Manosphere believers at the end of the day have to put in an unfalsifiable basis to their beliefs like "true desire", because if their beliefs are based on anything that can be proven or disproven by evidence they will have to admit they're wrong.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 06:33 PM
1

You can just not reply to my comment if you don't want to engage with what I wrote.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:42 PM

Therapy is prescribed as treatment for various mental health issues.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:41 PM
1

Of what? You want me to name a specific woman?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 04:41 PM
4

Your impression of women's lives seems to be a fantasy of being a hot young charismatic woman with wealthy parents. If you have an actual argument, you should be able to complain actual norms. Most men aren't in dangerous jobs, aren't criminals or homeless. There are lots of homeless women by the way, but you don't see them as much as it's not safe for them to be so public, if they don't hide they will get raped.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:17 PM
0

There are women who very much do worry about both of these things. And women who would love the hardest thing in their life and greatest gender equality worry to be dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:14 PM

Obviously, you're not getting medical treatment for a condition you don't have.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 03:11 PM
2

Generally a partner should be supportive rather than constantly criticising and "calling out" their partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 11:07 AM
5

I don't want to be treated like anything "because I'm a woman", but I do think in any relationship, both partners will have different roles. My needs are not the same as my husband's needs and we each have different strengths (none of this is gendered), so we treat each other in the way that makes sense for each of us rather than the same way. I don't think you even want a relationship where you and your partner do exactly the same things. And you certainly don't want to be treated by your partn…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:43 AM
2

It's not hypocrisy when it's two different things. Imagine a woman saying she wanted to relocate due to divorce laws, that would be the same thing and similarly wouldn't go down well.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 09:23 AM
5

A lot of people like having sex themed stuff for their hen dos like penis decor and sex-based truth or dare but I've never heard of anyone having a stripper other than a fictional character.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 08:04 AM
0

I wasn't making a point about how many men I want to approach me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 07:47 AM
2

It's rare for men to properly experience objectification (and they can't really ever experience it in the pervasive way that women do their whole lives), but when they do, they really hate it. They also don't seem to get the side of objectification that happens when you're seen as a bad object that's no good for sex, you're not just left alone about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 07:46 AM
1

Anyone who's objectifying you. He sees you as replaceable no matter whether he actually can replace you, you're interchangeable to him as he doesn't like you for yourself. Thanks for the random life advice that doesn't apply to me.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/07/26 07:43 AM
3

They don't care about you or your time, no more than they'd care about a sex toy for its inner self. They only care about how you look, a bit, even you admit it's just that, and even then they'll just replace you with someone else they think looks okay, nothing special about you in particular. You can be replaced perhaps more easily than an income stream.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 11:02 PM
3

From whose perspective exactly? I'd imagine that each man is viewed more favourably from the perspective of someone closer to his own age.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 10:03 PM
2

I have a full time job and salary. Idk what hobbies you find interesting but I'm into a variety of things, most prominent are board games and crafts, and my loved ones really like the things I knit, crochet and embroider for them. I don't "nag", unless you're the type that thinks politely reminding your partner to do something once is nagging, or you're the kind of partner who doesn't do it even after the reminder. I have life goals. Buy a house, advance in my career, travel to certain places, e…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 09:57 PM
8

They don't just want to spend time with you at all. They want you to do something for them (sex) and give something to them (sexual pleasure). They don't care about you, they'll replace you with the next once they're bored or decide you're a useless object. And women who are seen as useless objects are very much avoided.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 09:53 PM
2

Not really.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 09:50 PM

Absolutely I can, although obviously due to the shyness requirement they'll be people I personally know rather than celebrities.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 05:59 PM
1

More like some cakes are in fact rocks and you're told they're just "not to your taste". Objectification is not wanting a relationship or "wanting you for you" like OP claims to want and doesn't like feeling he's missing out on (although he admits he has relationship opportunities). Actually no men have approached me, shit, creepy, or otherwise. I'm not sure what "study" you're referring to. Or what would've happened if taken offline. Even most creeps aren't creepy in a couple of online messages…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 05:58 PM

Also several of the girlfriends and wives were criminals themselves.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:58 PM

You could list "weak, unmasculine and shy" men who have girlfriends and wives just as you can list a few serial killers who did. It's not evidence of who is disliked - obviously sane people dislike literal murderers (if known) way more than shy people.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:55 PM
-1

If you're defining "scared to approach" as not having a backbone, it's not hard to see why these men aren't getting relationships as often - if you don't ask you don't get.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 12:52 PM
-1

You really think women, with their general experience of being objectified (whether you're treated as a useful sex object or a useless sex object you're still not being desired for yourself at all), can't relate?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/07/26 08:54 AM

What would be better for a feeling of loneliness than anything else is to realise nobody but you can stop you from being lonely. You are the only one who can fix it, get yourself outside, make friends, etc. It's not the government's job, women's job or anyone else's job, it's not some problem out of your power to fix or that you should push onto someone else and you don't need to blame others when you are feeling bad or lonely. You can join a sports group if you want. The government does not hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 09:36 PM

Because it's neither true nor common sense, for a start. And that's not even getting into the awful misogyny usually used when this view is expressed.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 09:32 PM

What is "micro cheating" to you and why are you under the impression that most women do it, rather than some women you club with doing it?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 07:25 PM
2

Your sample size is one and you don't even know what that one person prefers or why she cheated. The reason she gives for cheating (he was kind and nice and made her feel special) is the opposite to the story you're trying to spin. A prime example of having a narrative and trying to make anything fit it and make it seem logical.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 04:29 PM
1

Then probably nothing I would arbitrarily pick for you would be good enough for you either.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 11:35 AM
0

You have access to multiple search engines.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 10:31 AM
0

Pick whichever you prefer.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/07/26 10:18 AM
3

Mongolia isn't really like a lot of other countries, as communities are small, insular and disconnected. There just isn't a lot of people there, which can skew statistics as well as produce results that aren't replicable. Mongolia also doesn't rank particularly highly in statistical gender equality measures and your whole argument is based on what things seem like to you and I don't know why they seem that way - are you Mongolian? I don't think nationalism will give you what you want anyway. Peo…
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 08:33 PM
4

I've never heard an American use that term before. I assume it's not common.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 03:42 PM
2

It's secondary school (age 11-18), you just need to take a test to go.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 10:44 AM
2

This would prevent many married couples from being together. Most marriages between people of different nationalities don't have a huge national income disparity and the countries are pretty similar, e.g. my own marriage, I am Irish and my husband is British and nobody is a passport person.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:29 AM
10

Sexual harassment is a different kind of disgusting.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:21 AM
13

Ooh, a grammar school, how fancy. It's much better to explain and acronym first (if you think the audience may be unfamiliar) and use it than spend an entire piece of writing using the full terms British Broadcasting Company or Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:20 AM
16

Your decision that the male "equivalent" is automatically about sex (and only sex) tells you a lot about why many people wouldn't be so keen on it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/26 06:17 AM
3

Most men you know don't walk in the dark or drink at parties and share their location with someone whenever they go on a date?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 01:04 PM
1

You'd need to study media analysis to get into the specifics of your question, which is now "how do writers and directors make us feel things"? We're also at the level where analysing that would depend on the specific case.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 12:08 PM
5

Men don't take similar safety measures as they find it too taxing. You often don't know the stress you're under until it's gone.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:30 AM
0

That's what media does, yes. Do you want me to teach you how to do media analysis?
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 11:26 AM
2

It's exciting, dramatic, engaging, etc like other genres of popular media.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 10:41 AM
2

For entertainment. That's mostly why people like any media. It's not profound nor is it supposed to be.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/06/26 10:29 AM
6

That maybe says more about the kind of people you know than anything else.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 09:18 PM
9

No matter your doubts, you're much, much more likely to be seriously hurt by a friend than a stranger. So you're saying even very extreme measures could be described as basic by you. Why should I listen to you about what is basic then? Why would I want to destroy my mental health by developing such a paranoid, anxious mindset that taking all these measures seems basic?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 09:13 PM
11

It's basic to you but to other people that's pretty restrictive. You're way more likely to be harmed by someone you already know actually (like the friend tracking you...) so your measures aren't very effective.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 09:06 PM
12

Mothers actually spend more time with their children than we've ever recorded before. Children used to spend a lot more time mixing with others rather than glued to their parents. There's evidence to suggest that this increased time with your parents and the overprotectiveness it often fosters leads to increased anxiety later.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 08:52 PM
8

Informing someone else of wherever you go, forgoing activities on the off chance something bad might happen, and moving house so you can carry a particular weapon is hardly basic.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 08:44 PM
19

Being hypervigilant all the time is exhausting and terrible for your mental health, and the measures you take often don't have much impact on whether the bad thing happens anyway. You're holding women to an impossible standard, and they get criticised heavily for any safety measures they do take anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 08:04 PM
8

No man with a healthy, trusting relationship that's been monogamous for at least nine months is going to ask for a paternity test. (Come on, if you're at the point you're checking whether your partner is cheating it's probably over.) It already reflects some deep problems in the relationship and the test itself could well be the last straw.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 12:42 PM

There's a whole section in the book Invisible Women on how we really shouldn't build women's toilets the same size as men's.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:37 AM

When Dad complains about the pickles they just give him the pickles first time. I know men who are massive Karens but they never get the criticism or labelling.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:27 AM

I'm not entirely sure that's true, but it could be because: 1) Periods are really messy. Sometimes they leave messes that can't be cleaned up. I don't think anyone is purposely flush a sanitary product when a bin is basically always right beside you, but some women/teenage girls don't know, and toilet paper can also cause a blockage. 2) Women's toilets get more use on average (you've seen the queues). Especially the actual flushing toilets where a lot more can go wrong. 3) There are a lot more c…
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 07:00 AM
1

It's Mario Kart...
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 06:07 AM
10

Men who do get treated like emotionally close female best friends often complain about being "led on". And if they're treated like standard female friends they often end up like this post, complaining that these mean women aren't prioritising their emotions.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 06:01 AM

I am funny, I make jokes. But I don't find bullying or bigotry disguised as joking funny. I don't suppose you think it's okay to laugh at others and make them into a joke, things don't automatically become okay just because you label them comedy. Can't you think of another joke, or do you just want an excuse to say horrible things about women?
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:57 AM
0

I just don't think it's that deep.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/06/26 05:55 AM
1

Safe to assume they don't have some special different way of doing anal. You can expect it to be the same. If it hurt before then that's what you can expect, better to avoid it altogether than keep trying the same thing expecting different results like a madwoman.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:08 PM
6

Will telling people out loud what you think of their bums help you with that?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 07:15 PM
14

Just think it, nobody wants to hear it so keep it to yourself.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 06:07 PM
19

Men who struggle to see women as people don't base it on their outfits. If seeing someone's belly button takes away their personhood for you, you didn't see them as a person to begin with.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 05:59 PM
1

If I think what would happen?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 04:50 PM
3

What exciting life do you have that you'd love to read a copy of? And have you tried keeping a diary?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 03:11 PM
1

Do you think that Johnny Depp should have "taken the hit" instead of doing the same thing and causing similar damage to what you predict to female victims? Remember, you've said she should do this regardless of what is true or false.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 11:24 AM
23

Dark romance is exciting and dramatic yet the underlying plot structure is usually pretty simple, that's great for a book. Nobody wants to read a book that resembles their actual life or the one they want, that's boring and without conflict you don't have a plot. It's more like trashy TV of train wreck relationships, Love Island wouldn't be successful if the couples were lovely and healthy. Cancer romance was a big thing before dark romance, I don't think many people wanted themselves or their p…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 11:12 AM
2

There are other meetups that aren't found on meetup.com if your local offer on the site isn't to your taste. You could try a less male centric hobby. Crochet is trendy right now. Do you not actually want to meet women? I get it, meeting people is scary. But not impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:55 AM
2

You could go to a meetup, join a hobby group, make more friends, etc. You could just go on your own again. Or you could give up after trying once and complain it's impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 09:46 AM
6

Women usually don't look up when a random person enters the room. Do you look up?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:51 AM
13

Why are you calling this cruelty or saying that women need to change? Anyone who wants to be left alone for the moment has every right to, it's hardly unreasonable or cruel to choose who yo socialise with and who your friends are or god forbid not personally date everyone who may be interested. You wouldn't think to call men cruel for having all-male friend groups and not talking to random women on the street. You'd maybe call them shy.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:50 AM
4

I don't think it's about being jealous so much as being worried you could have reason to be jealous if women aren't kept down. If women aren't kept in the home, they could lead in the workplace and family life, maybe men would be forced into the kitchen! If I don't criticise women's looks then they might all start looking ugly, or criticising my looks! They might develop more self esteem than me, and what then? An irrational fear, but a fear nonetheless.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:43 AM
8

The men who brag about never talking about feelings with their friends, ignoring them for months on end and having entirely practical-based friendships have a lot of overlap with those who complain about how sad and lonely men are. Some men may not choose to share themselves with others, but that comes at the expense of their emotional wellbeing. They do benefit from emotionally bonding in relationships even if they resist it at first. Everyone needs human connection. (And I do get it, it's a cr…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:36 AM
0

Men can't speak now? Who's been banned from speaking? Never known anyone to be deplatformed just for being a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:29 AM
1

Do you dismiss every scientific fact you don't like or that doesn't fit your narrative as propaganda? Yes, most men and women do have sex, disease or no.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:26 AM
1

The degree of social engagement in what? Seeing as you're dismissing actual research, you'd better have found a really good superior way of producing unbiased, accurate research.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:24 AM
0

Cool, I'm not her. Some men buy me birthday presents so you should buy me one too.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:22 AM
2

You're going to be so embarrassed when you look it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:20 AM
1

Are you trying to suggest that the user discussion of r/purplepilldebate is a good source of accurate, unbiased information?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:20 AM
2

I have no reason to personally care about what women who like casual sex think. This view is clearly being pushed to further a manosphere agenda (women hate like 80% of men and will just criticise them all the time even when it has no benefit to them, and will be hypocritical even when it has no benefit to them). You feel that way, and because you feel that way and I'm a woman disagreeing, you will find an unfalsifiable way to dismiss me by saying women are stupid. I've seen it a million times.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:19 AM
1

What do you mean by view counts? I responded to the original post which included exactly zero evidence for any claims made or even an indication of where evidence may be found. I strongly suspect that all views expressed in response to what I have said are based on personal feelings rather than looking at any evidence. Neither you nor anyone else have so far posted a link to any study. Yet I am bringing criticised for not wasting my time looking for links you're not going to click.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:15 AM
2

The original post didn't include any statistics, proof of (in my opinion) sense. I'm not very interested in hunting out links for people who won't click them. Not my idea of a good time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:11 AM
1

Nobody else involved here has referenced a study either. You're holding me to a higher evidentiary standard. Most of our opinions are not formed based on studies. Idk what someone else said or why that should affect what I do.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:10 AM
1

Because of their biology, women are more likely to catch STIs from men than the other way around. They're transmitted more easily from a penis than to a penis. I didn't downvote you, you commented at midnight GMT when I wasn't even awake.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:06 AM
1

You've met multiple women who love casual sex yet are against men having it?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/06/26 08:04 AM
6

Are they hypocritical in the specific way being described?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 10:26 PM
2

You're not interested in statistics. Idk if a study has been made on it and I'm not basing my opinion on that.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 10:18 PM

Were you trying to contradict what I said?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 10:17 PM
6

Are you going to show me any data proving the opposite, more counterintuitive point?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 10:12 PM

So what are you seeing on dating apps that's making things seem that way? You are aware that most women don't use dating apps, and there are far fewer women than men using them?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 10:02 PM

In what way(s) do they seem that way to you? It'd be helpful for you to tell us what you think you are seeing if you'd like it to be explained.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:58 PM
3

Why assume that when there's a much simpler pattern that also matches up to what's observed? (Other than to fuel an agenda of course.)
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:57 PM
8

I mean, exceptions exist to everything, but those who enjoy/have enjoyed casual sex just don't complain about others enjoying it. Why assume it's the same people other than to say "women bad"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:18 PM
3

You might not want to cold approach a woman at a cafe, but how about warm/lukewarm approaching a woman at social drinks with some male friends/acquaintances? There are situations where people are open to conversation with new people. People meet all the time, it's far from impossible.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 08:49 PM
0

Being direct and blunt doesn't mean you're honest or accurate. It often indicates you're not interested in subtleties, emotions, empathy, etc. Feelings are generally neither direct nor blunt, and expressing them in direct or blunt ways can often be lashing out.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 08:44 PM
0

Pubs, nightclubs or parties are definitely okay. Most other places it would be unusual but I'm not going to particularly judge usually unless it's somewhere obviously inappropriate like at a funeral, while you're her customer, something like that. Most approaches are at least lukewarm, which tends to be much more successful as well as lead to higher quality interactions and relationships as you don't know much about how you'll get on if you only know how they look.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 08:41 PM
20

Only a small minority of women consistently have casual sex at any point in their lives, and they're not the ones complaining about men having or wanting casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 08:34 PM
1

It is for equality by ending the subjugation of the oppressed class (women). Men are already advantaged and from an equality perspective they don't need even more unearned help. They can have help once women are on at least equal footing. You're just proving patriarchy by insisting even feminism, a movement for ending women's oppression, should focus more on helping and centring men. Women already help men a whole lot more than the other way around, and without insisting they're paid for it or g…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 07:11 PM

How are you going to "regulate the dating market"?
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 11:20 AM
0

But...you knew you didn't like it. Makes no sense from my perspective but okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:48 AM
1

No.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:46 AM

Most traditional pink collar jobs involve caring for or engaging with people in some way. Connecting with people can't be replaced by AI, and many of these jobs also have practical aspects that a computer can't do either. Technically is not a traditional pink collar job, and there's a lot of sexism there (as in any workplace) that means when laying people off women are often the first to go. How area small group of men going to force women back into the kitchen exactly? How are they going to bea…
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:44 AM
1

5'4".
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:35 AM
1

Why do you expect feminism to be about helping men? Women already help men plenty and bend over backwards making sacrifices for men.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/06/26 09:34 AM
3

Its only really worth it if you truly, desperately want the child at the end. It's a lot of torture and body horror but people will go through that for a child. And then you have to raise the child for at least eighteen years or live with abandoning your child. But people would like abortions when they don't want a child so badly.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 10:14 PM

Because they're human. They'll sacrifice a lot for love.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 10:01 PM

They may cook and clean, but significantly less than their partners. Finding a man who does otherwise is like finding a unicorn.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 09:59 PM

How many chores he does now is no indication of how many he will do when he can get his girlfriend to do them for him (and, although much more rarely, there are men who step up while in relationships too). Also, he often has someone else like his mum doing these things for him. And asking for proof would be seen as odd at the very least. Anyway, women just know that realistically they will have to do most of the work. You just need to accept that in order to date rather than asking will he pleas…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:41 PM
5

You're just saying that. No way do you actually find the majority of them cute.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 07:36 PM
19

He wouldn't find her cute if he saw her without context. She's not generally considered cute. She's hoping to even get a fat man to ask her out.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 06:26 PM
2

They're still saying they think that's what normal cute looks like. They're not qualifying it. And no, they're really not, but I'm guessing you think that loads of other people find women cute that you don't. Men tend to think their tastes are really unique.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 06:23 PM

Out of interest, how many romance books have you read?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:40 PM
6

Most women who are young and not overweight are not considered cute. When men are asked to show a normal cute but not exceptional women they show pictures of models.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:38 PM
29

If you don't notice non cute women or think they don't count, this is easy to say. The average woman is fat and middle aged, same as the average man.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 04:36 PM
1

If you only selectively listen, of course you'll be confused. Men and women do help each other mostly, maybe you need to look at it through a screen less.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:20 AM
1

What do you mean by "don't you know what it's for"? Forced pregnancy doesn't need to be a "consequence" of sex, it doesn't need to come with a potential punishment for women attached and we can make the world better by just not letting it happen. Ironic that you're then complaining about men not having enough sex. (If I assumed men were having the same amount of sex as me, I'd assume they only had one partner ever and were otherwise celibate, which I know isn't true. I'm saying your numbers don'…
/r/PurplePillDebate26/06/26 08:19 AM
1

If you get into a car crash, no matter how you did, you're still annoyed it happened and wouldn't want the hospital to turn you away for treatment for your car crash injuries and say you should've expected that and should never ride in a car if you can't accept the consequences. Many people take years to even admit to themselves they were raped. People often do keep it to themselves, it's considered very shameful. And it's not usually considered a reason for abortion in itself, here in the UK yo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 09:40 PM
1

Pregnancy can also result from protected sex. Contraception fails. It can also be sabotaged. And yes, rape is a thing, more common than statistically reported. Coercion, lying, abandoning your partner when they're pregnant, facing other changes in circumstance when you're pregnant are all things. Again, if you saw yourself in these shoes you would not want to be forced into these "consequences". You wouldn't even want the chance of it. (More than 75% of men have sex, are you talking about within…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 09:17 PM
0

They're depicting a pregnancy happening without them wanting it to. Which is what happens for someone to consider an abortion usually. Men can dismiss it as "natural" and therefore harmless when there's no chance of it happening to them, but when they begin to empathise or see it happening to themselves, the thought absolutely horrifies them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:33 PM
4

Why did you try it again?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 03:27 PM
9

I didn't say it was.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 02:17 PM
6

You don't need to have every single thing you want to be happy. Or to try.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 02:15 PM
6

You're still describing the temporary category. If someone well and truly can't find a date, what do they gain from not allowing themselves to be happy?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:37 PM
11

If you can just "fix it" and get into a relationship then you're in the temporary category. (Do you have to be miserable while doing that too?)
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:27 PM
13

I think it's actually more important to make the most of it if there's no end in sight. Are you going to try to be miserable single for apparently the rest of your life out of spite?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:22 PM
1

Yet when women do admit to having a preference for a normal/average size, or they have preferences for other superficial things but not penis length, they're told they're lying. Apparently it only counts if they prefer big.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:18 PM
1

Maybe in an abstract/general way, or saying something like so-and-so is hooking up with whoever. But more details than that is a bit gross and odd.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:12 PM
3

You're just saying that to try to prove a point. Of course really liking her wouldn't change the taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:09 PM
3

Have you ever done this?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 01:08 PM
3

It's harder to complain about women being picky if you admit you are also picking. It also messes with the victim mindset/lack of accountability of the kind of men who say this. If you take away your choice in the matter and claim you'd be happy with anyone, you can claim that nasty women are just hurting you by nobody picking you (of course they can totally tell you'd just date anyone and are personally rejecting you).
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:34 AM
-1

Because they're fellow human beings and they might picture themselves in their situation and think that they wouldn't like to be forced to create another person with their body either. There are literally horror films about this happening to men. Even if they're completely isolated from women and no women has ever helped them with anything (unlikely). I'm not blind, I don't know any blind people on a personal level, yet I feel sympathy for blind people and support access arrangements for blindne…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:28 AM
1

I have asked out a few different people (warm or lukewarm approach), one of them said yes. I always wanted to date to marry and so did he, and we liked each other enough that we decided to do that. I like quiet, nerdy types.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:19 AM

The issue is that the laws, at least as stated here in the UK, end up becoming problematic for everyone, especially women and girls: 1) If toilet access is based on biological sex, it seems you'd have to carry around some kind of proof of that just to use the toilet. There will need to be some kind of enforcing procedure that businesses put into place at least, which leads to 2) There will probably be fewer public toilets to get around the hassle and expense, which affects women and girls the mo…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:16 AM
3

Because she's tried enough times to know she doesn't like it. Changing the person isn't going to make the act different. Say you don't like mushrooms. You tried a few different mushroom dishes cooked by your ex and didn't like any of them. Are you going to want to try to see if you like a mushroom dish cooked by your current girlfriend? Probably not, as you know you don't like mushrooms.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:05 AM

They met their partners a variety of ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:02 AM
1

Your sexual preferences, kinks, etc are very much part of your sex life. And considered way too much information by many even if you haven't done it. No, I've never talked with friends about the kind of sex I have or the kind of genitals I prefer. I was at a New Year's Eve party once and a couple of American women I didn't know got drunk and started talking about penis size and making other people uncomfortable. That's it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 08:00 AM

That's a lot of what competence involves and the skills are transferable (organisation and finance for example). I see this kind of couple getting married and having children all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/06/26 07:57 AM
1

You really don't know any couples like this? Making more money doesn't make you more competent, many of the jobs that require the most competence are badly paid while making PowerPoints all day can rake in money.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 09:55 PM
3

Many women are much more competent than their partners and proud of it. Women being competent while their partners aren't is a really common trope/stereotype.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 09:50 PM
1

Why would I do that?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:57 PM
1

They vary. Some of these women I would date, some I wouldn't, their boyfriends seem to like them though and tastes differ.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:19 PM
1

Oh right, I don't live in California. Or a state. You're aware that this isn't an America specific forum?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:16 PM
3

Like being tuned in to reality? They provide another income while reducing expenses per person. There is no increase to your housing cost, very little to bills, and your groceries less than double as you can buy in bulk. Statistically speaking, living with a partner makes you much better off.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:15 PM
4

All the men I know from studying at Oxford are either in relationships or are intentionally avoiding them. Intelligent women especially aren't joking when they say they like intelligent men. They get rid of fart joke men so fast.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:02 PM
1

What a stereotype! How are they expensive?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:58 PM
1

What's CA? Do you think your area describes the situation everywhere, or at least the normal one?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:58 PM
2

I don't think that most dating app users are living with parents and plan to do so forever.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:28 PM
9

It's much cheaper to live with a partner than on your own so long as they have a job, which most people do.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:12 PM
1

Liked? For who they are? You're not serious.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 04:39 PM
3

Your preference for the size of penis you have sex with is very much about your sex life, and a very specific detail at that. No, that's not normal conversation.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 12:56 PM
3

Well, that says something about your friend group. Many people just aren't comfortable talking about their sex lives with platonic friends, especially in this much detail.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 11:39 AM
1

I'm not sure what you mean by "third worlder work", I've never heard that phrase before and assumed you'd made it up. Washing dishes isn't that much work when you have a dishwasher (lucky you). But there's clearly more work than they can handle in whatever form if their wives are having to pick it up too after a full day of work.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 11:15 AM

It sounds like she maybe can't. Some women just can't orgasm or can only do it in specific circumstances, no matter what you or your ego do.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:48 AM
1

When and how did I blame anyone individually or indicate I wanted to?
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:46 AM
1

Very well when they choose to do them!
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 08:02 AM
1

All you've known is having a baby. You don't know if parenting in general is hard. You've also admitted their wives are doing housework in the evening, earning them their time to relax while their wives work and their children...I don't know what they're supposed to be doing.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:59 AM

It's not so much about status so much as if thousands of people are following you on social media then thousands of people know who you are, chances are some of them will find you hot. And there are people who will date for fame even if they're not into you too.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:57 AM
2

Yes, I prefer average, the vast majority of dicks fit into this category for a reason, as do dildos (you count insertable length, they have a bit extra space for holding it). If I didn't like that size, my dildos would be bigger. The g spot can be reached with fingers, all a long length does is risk hitting my cervix and hurting. But most of all I prefer effort and a man who doesn't expect me to get off from his penis or its size alone. Men care and talk about penis size a lot more than women do…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/06/26 07:50 AM
1

The measure of bigotry is not who you personally date. Let's maybe consider who does hate crimes. And, you know, things that actually hurt gay and bisexual people.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:32 PM
1

Do you really want to say it's a nice thing that people should like being done to them and reflects kind, accurate, respectful views towards bisexuals?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:28 PM
1

I did.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:39 PM
1

Oh wow. So they just relax for five hours while their wives work at their "not serious" jobs and their children... nobody knows, they're just really "well raised".
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:08 PM
2

Most bisexuals are in straight relationships. Most asexuals are straight and want a straight relationship. Feeling of community, trying to find identity, feeling like you don't like heteronormative stereotypes or gender roles, attention, etc. Most American women aren't single. Single women's attitudes towards relationships won't reflect all women's attitudes for obvious reasons. Their wants also usually change at different times. Most American women, and other women, both want a relationship and…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:06 PM
1

I have always found it quite appealing personally. If imagine a woman with more "experience" might think differently though. We tend to prefer to date those who are similar to us and those who have dated a lot of different people are more likely to talk about it (and, naturally, you're more likely to end up in a dating situation with them). Some men certainly do seem to need teaching about how to be in a relationship...and many of those men have already been in relationships and/or had casual se…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:59 PM
1

So now the children are doing the dad's tasks for them. Stay at home mums tend to let their children actually enjoy their childhood. Once the children go to school they can't do your work for you any more! You also will need to run around after them with school pick ups, clubs, entertaining their friends, etc. (Just wait until you have a toddler at least and you'll see if they behave as if they're "raised correct" and can be easily "trained".) I'm guessing you have a different idea of cooking to…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:10 PM
1

Why would how he looks make him want hookups any less? I've known men to want hookups when zero women have expressed interest in them. In fact they can be quite scared of commitment.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:04 PM
1

If they're only doing a couple of hours of work then they really should go and get a job...
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 04:02 PM
6

These things you're saying don't even track with women here. They're exaggerated/minority opinions.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:52 PM
4

LGBT isn't all L. Many are bisexual, trans, asexual or some microlabel that's a roundabout way of saying straight. Even if you're thinking only 70% of women are possibly capable of attraction to men, way more than a third of them want a monogamous (and only monogamous) relationship with one. Children fare best with two parents. Very few people will have a child without another parent being around (so a monogamous relationship would be needed). The birth rate would be way, way lower.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:49 PM
-1

Statistically speaking women are better at maths. They do take less maths courses though!
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 12:42 PM
1

Some of them are doing it. But most are not. With less gender stereotypes, more of them would do it. What I wrote was not in absolutes but you seem to want to turn it into absolutes.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 11:08 AM
4

Thanks for the insults! I'm not a stay at home wife, but my husband did stay at home for a time. No children, but he did a proper job of it which meant he certainly didn't have as much relaxation time as your friends. It seems like your friends aren't doing much then? Don't "learning activities" take form or are they just calling them that? Aren't they cooking dinner? The children are just doing nothing and respecting their space while they cook and clean? What happens with the friend who's stil…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 10:25 AM
10

People often don't want to show their attraction in an obvious way if it's not reciprocated. And attraction does grow the more you know someone especially in a romantic way. Neither point is specific to women. Nobody but you knows who you "truly are". We can't read your mind. Your actions are the only way you have of communicating your true self to others.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:32 AM
3

I'm not saying they're terrible. But it is likely that they will do less. They're capable of doing otherwise but that's how it is right now.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:01 AM
9

No, I'm not talking about saying "you're pretty". I'm talking about sexual harassment. I don't want to repeat disgusting abusive things that have been said (and surely fill someone's wank bank), if you can't imagine them and the pictures that are sent and are somehow just so clueless over what sexual harassment is you can look it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 09:00 AM
4

It's a really common idea on this subreddit that a man not looking hot or not being wanted by many women somehow implies he's automatically a nice person and/or prefers committed relationships. Of course, that makes no logical sense at all. Your post relies on this assumption. No, not everyone agrees.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:15 AM
5

Typically and stereotypically, women provide order, organising everyone and everything in the household so everyone else just has to play their part.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:11 AM
7

This poor woman just wants space to cook! That's what counters are for, storage is what cupboards are for! They're perfectly efficient to use, you open them and get your stuff out in two seconds same as grabbing them off your cluttered, unusable counter.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:08 AM
2

This is a classic case of taking something human and making it about women. Most people feel that they are the main character and put in most of the work in their relationships. Most people want to be recognised for the small things they do. Most people don't want to feel like their partner would be just fine without them and don't want to see their exes happy. This isn't gendered. In most relationships, contributions aren't roughly equal. Partnered men have significantly more free time than par…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 07:01 AM
11

I see stay-at-home dads as having the same "rules" as stay-at-home mums, but they often don't choose to fulfil quite the same responsibilities. A more common scenario for someone to be a stay-at-home dad is unplanned, often after they've lost their job, and they're not doing quite the same amount of household labour to the same quality as a stay-at-home mum usually would - so it's reasonable to ask what else they contribute.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:56 AM
7

In case you aren't aware, sexual harassment hurts people. It is a form of harm no matter what you do afterwards. It's not simply offence or disrespect, you're belittling it and reducing it to just a form of rudeness. This is how excuses get made for sex crimes. What generalisation did I make about all men?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:49 AM
16

Five times sounds like trying it to see if it would get any better. Then it didn't. You've certainly had things in your life you don't like, but didn't immediately quit straight away when you first tried.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:11 AM
18

Is trying something and not liking it a foreign concept to men? Surely you have at some point tried something (sex act, food, TV show, whatever) that you didn't like and therefore didn't want to try again?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:09 AM
9

Even if you block and report, they still hurt you, that still sucks, and you might not want to keep using an app where this keeps being done to you. Imagine if a man kept being beat up by different people at work and you said "just report the small minority to HR, why would you miss out on this opportunity by quitting?" It's not misandrist to speak up about and not pretend men are perfect angels.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:07 AM
0

-Being overly protective or possessive. Men commonly miss this one too. It maybe seems cute at first, then often becomes a form of abuse. -"Benevolent" sexism. Again, they'll first introduce their restrictive views on gender roles in a "cute" way. And if they're saying anything sexist, racist, etc at the beginning when they're on their best behaviour, know they hold views that are worse. -Different views on having children, marriage or any major life choice. Also a common one for men. If you kno…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 06:00 AM
4

You don't really think that the majority of women don't want a monogamous relationship. I'm also not sure how children are being raised in this scenario.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:53 AM
5

You're forgetting that, if you're a woman, some of the "houses" will sexually harass you. And that's before taking it offline or even messaging back. There's a reason why women are far less likely to use dating apps than men, giving women who do use them more choices.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/06/26 05:50 AM
0

If they want to warm approach someone, it's well within their power to get to know them first. They're still picking who they approach or don't, it's their own fault if they don't like their picks.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:23 PM
1

They can pick what they like. Warm approach, cold approach, no approach, it's up to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 01:05 PM
1

As men are constantly complaining about on this subreddit, usually in straight dating men are making the first move. Meaning they pick who to make a move on and who to create opportunities with. If they don't like who they're picking, they could very well go and ask out another kind of person.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/06/26 08:22 AM
5

Same as with women, depends on who it is (do I have reason to care about them) and what it's for (is it something I find deserving of sympathy). Which I think can come across as a bit cold to some men as they often expect a lot more coddling from women than women usually get. If you're not someone close to me, male or female, the most you're going to get is usually "I'm sorry that happened", but I think men expect more.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:20 PM
1

Sperm is really the only one that's unique to men. Which is fine. They can provide plenty of other things that aren't unique.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 05:11 PM
0

That would work just fine if anti-feminists weren't in the practice of disingenuously bringing up "men's issues" to fuel backlash.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:36 AM
2

Acting like you don't have a choice is how you end up in shitty relationships, or no relationship.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:33 AM
2

If I don't want to pursue someone but do feel attracted to them I may act like this, trying to distance myself. It's more likely they just don't like you though.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:30 AM
13

Most critiques of certain kinds of feminism have been brought up by other feminists. For example, I and many other feminists think that feminists often focus too much on the first world and ignore violations of human rights in countries outside their own. I've noticed it especially with certain American feminists who seem to think America is just the worst place to be a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:28 AM
0

I think you'd be surprised. No, it's not just Sweden. I live in the UK, a normal first date would be drinks (pub or coffee shop), one person buys a round then the other does. If you're not privileged enough to have a spare £10 you have more to worry about than dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/06/26 08:23 AM
3

Leaving aside how culture- and location-dependent this is, how much do first dates usually cost? It's a bit of a lofty conclusion you're making over paying for one date, obviously there is way more effort that could be made or not made in a relationship. (Oh yes, and planning. How could anyone compete with the enormous burden of choosing a venue once. You might need to talk to each other as well, how difficult!)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:50 PM
0

So you don't understand what feminism is and have a big chip on your shoulder.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 10:43 PM
1

You can tolerate a lot more for one night than you can for months or years on end.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 07:09 PM
2

Men don't look any less attractive, you're just straight.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:36 PM
5

The "exceptions" are the women who actually have casual sex, who are a minority.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:34 PM
0

So you don't understand what feminism is. Most women are neither by the way.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:28 PM
1

You could've just looked it up.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 05:27 PM

Where have you been? Usually abortion is done due to not being able to provide a good life for a child, not just not liking pregnancy and birth. This is very common to say.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:25 PM

I don't think that's scientifically possible, but if it was there would still be abortion. Some foetuses still wouldn't be medically viable or would suffer severe health defects if they were born. There would still be rape and incest pregnancies. And there would still be people who don't want to create a child even if pregnancy didn't have to be involved. Most abortions are carried out not because a woman doesn't want to be pregnant but because neither she nor her sex partner want to bring a chi…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 03:17 PM
2

Prostitution is sex. Why on earth are you saying otherwise? They don't find each other hot at all, they're not attracted to each other. I don't think you're getting that. Not everyone can be found attractive by any individual no matter the circumstance. Maybe it would help if you pictured one of the people as elderly. Will sex definitely happen then?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 01:55 PM
2

Doing sexual acts and having sex are the same thing? Mentally it's going to be hard even if it felt a tiny bit better physically, many people wouldn't think it's worth it. Just being capable of being into someone's gender doesn't mean you will ever be into them or even be likely to. I said it's not just society, not that it's never society.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 11:57 AM
2

It's not just society that makes people not want to have sex with those they're not attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 11:24 AM
6

We discuss other people's choices being good or bad all the time. We're allowed to have an opinion on them. Better would mean resulting in a higher quality relationship, more happiness, fairness and other benefits. It's unfair as it disadvantages the woman. You can agree to something that's unfair to you and even see it as good. Married women on average have less free time than single women, and that's when including those with more equal dynamics in the mix. Doing unpaid work means you don't ge…
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:58 AM
3

Or they might not. Many people don't "experiment" and would prefer to just masturbate if there's nobody available who they're into. Shame isn't the only reason to not have sex, especially when you're not even into the other person. And it'd get really awkward on that desert island after. Remember, they're stuck with each other.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:42 AM
4

It's your choice to do so, that doesn't mean that it's the best choice or one you should make. Feminists often push back against this being considered a default or better choice, as well as unfairness that is usually part of this dynamic (usually it isn't really fair or equal, the woman will do a lot more work and losea lot more freedom and be much more vulnerable should the relationship end).
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:19 AM

How could I separate one from the other? How he treats me is just the expression of who he is. Personality traits aren't things you have detached from what you actually do.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:15 AM

A country, race or culture being dominant in the past doesn't mean those outside of it are just dumb and can't engage with ideas. "Europe" has also never meant "rich white men", they're still a minority group. Seething? I'm not sure what you're assuming about me here.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:10 AM
0

Men are likely to support "gender equality" if it means women doing equally as much paid work but continuing to do the majority of household labour.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:07 AM
1

Men care a lot more than women about women looking good.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/06/26 09:06 AM
3

It depends on the people. They can't be sexually attracted to each other but might decide to use each other as essentially enhanced masturbation, or they might prefer to satisfy their sexual desires completely on their own. The same could apply even if they're into each other's gender, but just not into each other specifically.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:41 PM
5

Never heard of a man being told he must "work himself to death" to be happy or make others happy. Men pressured into having children are usually just required for providing sperm with parenting being optional. Women do their best with the options they have, but they're shaped differently to men's.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:38 PM
1

Well, maybe women will walk away from buying clothes once we stop shoving down their throats that appearance and beauty are so important.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:36 PM
18

There are a lot of people, especially young people, who aren't really confident enough to initiate interactions on their own. Many barely leave the house. You'd be surprised. Confidence will mean different things depending on who's saying they find it attractive, but it's certainly not a default.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:33 PM
6

And yet women do more combined, and men have more free time, on average.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:24 PM
4

Most mothers work full time.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 10:27 PM
5

Being a mother demands earning a wage and raising children. That is more.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 09:40 PM
6

It's not even normal for anyone to negotiate salary outside America. So probably not. They'll just get someone cheaper.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 09:39 PM
10

Women get less of a chance to negotiate, they are looked down on more for doing it so it's less likely to be accepted. If men are difficult at work it's seen as a quirk, but women who are difficult at work get fired. Negotiating salary is mostly an American thing anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 06:51 PM
8

Those tradeoffs demand more from women than men...and women still accept them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 06:50 PM
9

I think that sketch is showing that biphobia can express itself in different ways - fetishisation or avoidance.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:14 PM
6

I'm in a mixed orientation relationship so pretty familiar with what you might come up against. The big thing is I feel I'll never really understand what it is to be attracted to just one gender, and it happens the other way perhaps more often with ideas like thinking bisexuals won't be happy with monogamy. Often monosexual people don't want their partner to interact with the gender they're into past a certain level which causes issues for bisexuals, and other relationship norms can be different…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:12 PM
11

None of these are normal things. Women earn less than men even when more qualified. They're still less likely to be given an opportunity. But they're welcome to spend time and money getting qualifications to try.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:04 PM
13

Not inherently but on average they are more expensive. You seem to think I've never been to a supermarket, I'm a bit of a cheapskate so know full well to buy men's products as they're cheaper.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:03 PM
-1

Sorry, must've deleted it in my brain as I assumed you'd be bi instead of pushing another agenda onto bisexuals.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:45 PM
1

OP.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:38 PM
12

The whole point is that women don't have the same access to things and hence cannot make the same choices. This systematic disadvantage creates a wage gap. It's not "nuance", on the face of it there is a gap and you're the one trying to nuance it away by saying "it doesn't exist because there's a reason for it". That woman was making bad statistics too, but it is true that products marketed to women are on average more expensive than those marketed to men.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:37 PM

I've never come across anyone who's said any amount of alcohol impairs consent. The issue is generally when someone is at least noticeably drunk (and the other person isn't) or plied with alcohol when the other person knows they wouldn't consent otherwise. Likewise, there are certain mental conditions (although you're probably talking intellectual disabilities more than mental illnesses) where you probably can't consent unless the other person has a similar condition, but saying you can't consen…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:29 PM
8

You're overthinking it and putting in extra steps. It's cultural homophobia and biphobia, which men very much support and endorse too. You'll also come across it if you want to date a man. And, you know, there are other reasons why a straight woman might want to date a straight man, mixed orientation relationships can have their challenges.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:23 PM
3

He could date a man but biphobia in the gay male community is something manosphere men want to keep under wraps...
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:20 PM
15

I had to leave r/marriedandbi, there seems to be nobody in a normal monogamous relationship in there. Just cheating, threesomes, open relationships, etc. In the in person bi community it's not like this but I see how people get the impression.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:19 PM
49

Because reality is not always comforting. It often sucks. Statistics are very easy to distort, making a chart or percentage out of something doesn't necessarily reflect a meaningful fact. And when it comes to gender, there are a lot of issues with data collection and women's experiences are often ignored, downplayed or left out. (For example, saying that there's no wage gap when you control for parenthood and job choice, completely ignoring that there are specific pressures on women regarding pa…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:12 PM
1

I think most people are good most of the time. They usually act on their morals and are mostly able to organise their own lives past a certain age. And nobody is good all of the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 03:08 PM
0

Far worse. Straight men don't know what attracts men. They'd either get nothing or end up making front page news from a random hookup.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 11:55 AM
3

Most women don't look for top earners either. As stated in the OP people tend to date and marry similar earners to them. I'm not sure there are any other countries with joint filing taxes, indeed filing taxes is a thing that's not done in many countries (not sure why Americans have to calculate it themselves), but maybe someone else will mention if it's a thing where they are. Anyway, people still get married in the UK without any real financial incentive (apart from inheritance).
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 06:15 AM
3

You contradicted yourself in the first line. To be self-supporting you will need to make a certain amount. In households, women tend to do shopping chores more (groceries) while men tend to do financial chores more, so it looks like women spend while men save. Women are also more likely to be raising children without a partner, which means they have to spend lots more money while their dad can save. Filing taxes jointly is just an American thing I think. I do actually receive some tax relief due…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:32 AM
1

I'm not multiorgasmic so this would entail my partner having zero orgasms, which I wouldn't accept if I had means of fixing it. It feels selfish, same as when men are orgasming but don't put in effort for their partners to orgasm.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/06/26 05:24 AM
22

You really think women went through the Enlightenment not thinking or engaging with ideas at all. I guess by that logic only rich white men exactly like those whose works are celebrated got an Enlightenment. Men and women know themselves but that knowledge is also always growing and changing.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 09:21 PM
8

Having a particular preference in partners is not bad or intellectually disingenuous. The "criticism of women" was that they were supposed to be hypocritical in their preferences or something, when as explained in this case it's just different people speaking. I'm not playing dumb, you're just not making sense. Trying to push an agenda where it's not even on topic.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 04:38 PM
6

The kind of connection you're trying to draw here is so contrived I can't make out what you're trying to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 04:31 PM
3

You're really trying to justify this? No, I don't think anyone represents me or necessarily has anything in common with me just because we have the same genitals. I can't really agree or disagree with someone's preference, they likely do have the preference they say and other people will have different preferences. I'm not saying they don't count, but they obviously don't represent the group that prefers the opposite thing to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 04:13 PM
3

Flying debris? Be serious.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 10:04 AM
52

As per usual, "women have been sending mixed signals" really means "different women are saying different things and this is confusing me as I think all women must be the same".
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 09:55 AM
3

Well, I really don't want to be treated like a child who would just choose to randomly run into the road.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 09:53 AM
2

I am Gen Z. I've heard of that as a rule for walking with children so they don't run into the road...not with a partner though. Seems silly.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:56 AM
2

In that case, it's valid to wonder why he didn't just listen to her and what she liked. Especially in the case of what kind of date she would like, it'd be easy to just ask.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:52 AM

You're assuming that the men in these crime stats hurting their partners are worse than average instead of just being average. Normal people are more capable of harming someone else than they know.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:49 AM
5

Well, my husband is a man and has wanted identical things to me in dating. So I guess I would've done the same thing as I actually did, warm approached people I had a crush on until I found someone who wanted a relationship with me and hopefully gotten married in my early twenties.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:45 AM
2

Yes, I don't like those norms and have never had or wanted them in my relationship. I have always earned more than my husband and probably spend a bit more on him too. I don't even like being given gifts I can't repay, it makes me uncomfortable. I don't know what the "sidewalk rule" is and didn't know that standing in front of someone when the lift opened was a thing (why). I can open my own doors, I think it's a bit weird not to when you're not carrying something. I do not want or need someone …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/06/26 08:39 AM
1

I'm saying "lucky you" as in "that's nice it happened to you, never happened to me". I don't think being hit on is "basic kindness".
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 05:02 PM
6

Does female puberty get celebrated in your culture? I think in the culture of most users here, no puberty gets celebrated, and that's fine. I find it odd to celebrate someone reaching puberty personally, the closest we would have would be having a bigger celebration for your sixteenth and/or eighteenth birthday.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 02:32 PM
2

It's an issue if any site has your ID really. It can be used to impersonate you in the case of a data leak. And credit card details are even worse, they can be used to directly spend your money. I'm anti porn, but still a tad salty I can't go on fetlife or buy sex toys here in the UK any more without a VPN.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 10:10 AM
6

I think being anti porn is fundamental to being sex positive. I also think that the things on your wish list realistically can never happen, so the only ethical and self-caring thing to do is avoid porn entirely.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 09:00 AM
2

What is it with porn users and conflating porn with sex toys?
/r/PurplePillDebate17/06/26 08:56 AM
1

Everyone is susceptible to influence. Again, this isn't like other media. No matter how good you are at critical thinking, you're changing your brain on a different level.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:53 PM
1

Time to propose. I love nerds. Doesn't need to be a shared interest or anything (I've never watched Alien).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 07:36 PM
1

It's more that the one who regretted nothing is an exception to the rule.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 03:24 PM
2

It doesn't contradict what I said at all, which was a prediction about what a different woman would do in the future.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:30 PM
3

If someone had never intervened but instead looked on or joined in when an animal was hit, I wouldn't have any faith in them to step in when someone was hitting an animal.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:20 PM
2

You left out the end of her comment, she says she still wouldn't recommend it 😂 I think I do know better generally than those five years younger than me and they're free to use their agency to make their own mistakes.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 02:16 PM
5

If they don't care about women when it's easier to, they won't care when it's harder either.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:52 PM
6

She'll go through with it and it'll end in tears and in a few years she'll be on X telling a nineteen-year-old that dating older men isn't worth it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:39 PM
5

The ones who aren't even standing for them now?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:38 PM
10

If you think a hookup with someone who doesn't give a shit about you would cure your "loneliness", you're not lonely, you're horny.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 01:27 PM
1

Sure, but it does other things that are bad. Pretty direct consequences of objectifying women on sex and relationships with women.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:55 PM
1

If you see someone in a piece of publicly accessing media, I think it's a fair default assumption that they're not being their most authentic selves. Do you think reality TV is real too?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:45 PM
2

Even if you think that, it's no bad thing that not watching porn helps with sex and relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:40 PM
3

Because real couples can't act? How do you know they're real couples? They could be acting.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:30 PM
0

What a lovely, not at all misandrist view.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:29 PM
2

What do you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:26 PM
2

Even for the rare person who enjoys it they're still acting. They're not going to be their real, authentic selves in videos that are publicly shared. It's not like joy is the only thing that matters here. It can be unethical even if everyone enjoys it. It can be fake even if everyone enjoys it. It can be harmful even if everyone enjoys it.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:23 PM
8

Groups having overlap doesn't mean you can conflate them. Most knitters are women, that doesn't make them the same or their views the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 12:08 PM
7

You're conflating lots of different groups of people. I think men who don't watch porn are far happier. They even say as much after quitting. But it's hard to see while you're in the trap.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:59 AM
5

Yes, I do assume that those who are knowingly making media to publicly share are acting rather than being their most truthful and authentic selves. I think that's a fair assumption. It doesn't just seem like acting, it is acting. Ejaculation was what I meant by forcing it. Male porn actors describe using various methods to ejaculate when they're not feeling it, which is usually. Sometimes the ejaculate used is even fake. Porn acting is different from other sex or exhibitionism, even exhibitionis…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:39 AM
7

That slogan isn't even connected to the anti porn movement.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:25 AM
5

If you listen to ex performers that's not what they're saying at all. It basically never does get prosecuted.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:23 AM
4

Sure, mate. If you tone it down a bit then it looks a bit more believable.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:22 AM
1

Obviously they're not going to speak up against an industry they're currently in, but basically everyone has horrific stories to tell once they've left. Porn addiction is very normalised, many people can't even separate porn from masturbation any more. Anyway, it's just a notable difference. If someone enjoyed masturbating to watching child slavery in chocolate production you would call them sick. I never said anything about laws. There's a proven negative association between porn use and views …
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:20 AM
6

I pity those on the receiving end.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 11:01 AM
2

Because couples and amateurs and people using toys don't act? It's still acting even if you're not good at it. Do you think reality TV is real too? The orgasm is very often acted out or forced. It doesn't indicate enjoyment or consent.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:59 AM
1

While they are acting, they're also really having sex, many under coercion. Most porn actors experience rape in their careers. It's incredibly addictive and negatively shapes how you see sex and relationships and attitudes towards women and minorities. Normal books and films don't do this, and masturbating to porn is likely responsible for a lot of this effect.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:54 AM
4

It's all acting, unless it's revenge porn where at least one party doesn't know it's being made. It's certainly not sex ed.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:43 AM
2

You think the point of sex is to look good? I guess that is a common feeling for those who watch a lot of porn, decentering their pleasure in favour of feeling like they'd look good to an observer. I find it sad. It's not that you're thinking of sex during sex, but that you're thinking of other people having sex and feel that's normal. Especially as it's porn and that could've been someone else's worst moment...
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:29 AM
0

No, just humans.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:25 AM
1

What do you mean?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:18 AM
0

Even vanilla porn is set up to look good to cameras rather than actually feel good and consent is an afterthought at best. A good sex position is one that feels good rather than looking "interesting". You might want to reflect on the way you're even thinking of porn while you're having sex with another person. From an outside perspective it sounds horrifying.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:17 AM
9

I wonder what you think people did in the centuries of human history before porn. The idea that you need either real or imagined images to masturbate "to" has only really appeared with the spread of internet porn, as well as the idea that you need to turn yourself on to masturbate rather than just doing it when you're already horny.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:15 AM

If you've had sex with over five hundred prostitutes, chances are you have, unless you've specifically only picked those who look much older than eighteen. I hope you haven't but it's not looking good statistically speaking, and I don't know why you're not concerned with the possibility or think it isn't your business (until someone points out you could've had sex with a child that is).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:03 AM
9

Don't tell me you're actually trying out what you see in porn. To keep it brief, it displays a very distorted version of sex and consent that's not intended to be replicated.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:01 AM
9

It's not a replacement. Masturbation may be a replacement, but saying porn is a replacement for sex is like saying looking at pictures and videos of food is a replacement for eating. Those who are anti porn are usually not against sex one bit. Many want to make sex and relationships healthier and believe less porn would lead to more and better relationships.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 10:00 AM

You don't think it's your problem if you have sex with a child?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:48 AM
16

Porn isn't sex, and I'd argue porn is anti-sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:06 AM

I can guarantee the age range only officially starts at eighteen. In reality it will be significantly lower.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:06 AM

Johns are sex buyers. In England, Scotland and Wales the laws are more strict for prostitutes. Prostitution is technically legal but many parts of it are illegal so there'll always be some justification to punish if that's wanted. Only Northern Ireland has the Nordic model.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:05 AM
2

How dare women have to like you to have sex or a relationship just as you have to like them! What awful hoops! You might have to talk to them or something. Obviously the solution is to try to buy someone who doesn't want to be with you. What a quality relationship, that's so much better.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 09:03 AM

Like in the UK? Northern Ireland has the Nordic model and the rest of the UK is kind of selective enforcement but the it really only targets prostitutes, not johns.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 08:58 AM
1

I replied to your comment before you edited it, which didn't really have a topic. There is more equality in dating now than there has been previously. It seems to be that equality is what you don't like.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 08:54 AM
1

I don't think that having preferences, or beyond preferences, people you just plain aren't attracted to, is discriminatory. It could be rooted in some discriminatory ideas but it usually isn't. Sexuality isn't all preferences, there are some people you just can't make yourself feel attraction towards and that's okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 08:09 AM
3

I've never known a successful relationship to come from a random approach anywhere that wasn't a pub or club. Maybe in other countries it's normal to approach random strangers in the supermarket, but it makes no sense to do that here.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:58 AM
4

So you're saying these men are choosing to physically fight each other due to others getting into an argument. Seems to be their own problem. Women settle disputes without hitting each other or anyone getting killed. Perhaps you should associate with people with less aggression issues?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:47 AM
0

You've been hit on unprompted? Lucky you.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:35 AM
1

You think relationships would be better if your partner had no rights? Maybe they would be for someone who didn't care about their partner...
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:32 AM
1

If you don't date someone due to their gender is it sexist? We can't help who we're attracted to and we just can't be attracted to everyone equally, it's not discrimination to be attracted to some kinds of people and not others. People who openly partake possibly shame creators the hardest. Those who don't use the service just don't tend to be emotionally invested enough.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:31 AM
3

Trusted? Women are in general less likely to be believed when they say anything. Desired? Women are largely treated as interchangable, even in a sexual or romantic sense. The common expression of "desire" women get is catcalling and harassment used to intimidate.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:27 AM
2

The most realistic scenario is that nobody does a thing to help. Someone, most likely a woman, might ask you if you're okay once he's gone but that's the best you'll get. How exactly are men getting killed due to their girlfriends "lipping off"?
/r/PurplePillDebate16/06/26 06:25 AM
1

You can't seriously tell me you don't think that OnlyFans creators and other porn stars are shamed. Not personally dating someone isn't discrimination either.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 09:24 PM
0

That's debatable.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 09:23 PM
9

More like buying Starbucks and shaming people who work there. I would certainly judge someone who did that. It says something that you're seeing not personally dating someone as equivalent to shaming. Bet you didn't even notice your words don't match the post's words.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 05:49 PM
2

This is absolutely just your guess rather than a statistic. (Also, what do you mean by "men"? Each individual man finds the majority of women attractive or for the majority of women there's at least one man who finds each one attractive?)
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 04:19 PM
3

That's not true. It's not a bad thing or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:42 PM
19

Aren't women generally known for taking fewer risks, future planning more and living in the moment less? Of course I value a shared past and it would make me sad to leave that, but ultimately if something isn't working there's no use in forcing it just because of memories. I've not had a romantic relationship like this but I've had to do it with friendships. I'm not sure how to give an example of valuing it. It impacts on emotions certainly but what kind of behaviour change would you even expect…
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:40 PM
3

So you're treating women you don't think are attractive like they don't exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:19 PM
4

You did not say you agreed and you said you couldn't even imagine a woman having a similar experience. Maybe you thought you did but you can just scroll up. And in my experience, no, they aren't flattered at all. Men really don't like it when a woman they don't like tries to make a move. They like it when a woman they find hot does though.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 02:07 PM
2

I'm not saying that lived experience is nonexistent. I'm saying women can experience it too.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:54 PM
-1

It's like some men don't even acknowledge the existence of non hot women or something, they can't even imagine them.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:51 PM
0

In that case there isn't one.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 01:37 PM
3

That's great for you and all but many women don't have relationship options they don't have to work for.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:34 AM
7

The only women I've actually come across with this kind of expectation aren't career women and don't even work full time, or expect to work part time or not at all after having children to take care of.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:32 AM
4

Men have always been scared or at least claimed they were scared that that women getting more rights would ruin their romantic relationships or make women sexually or romantically undesirable, whether through modern accusations of "hypergamy" or otherwise.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:29 AM
-1

You know what actually happens when the police attend an alleged domestic abuse case (if they even do)? They give both parties a talking to and maybe suggest someone stays with a friend for the night usually.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:25 AM
3

The only time I've actually heard this used is when, although both have technically consumed alcohol, the man is a bit tipsy and the woman is blackout drunk.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/06/26 06:23 AM
20

I'm guessing that most of the women asked just didn't hook up in general...
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 09:44 PM
1

I dare say that not having casual sex could be more usual than having it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 09:38 PM
1

I hope you're not calling that a research paper.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 09:37 PM
1

Way more than a handful. A lot of people have three or fewer partners their whole lives, and it's unlikely any of them were casual when there were so few. Lifetime sex partner distribution is clustered at the lower end in general.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 09:35 PM
1

Many don't want to, even if you like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 08:25 PM
1

Not everyone has the same taste as you.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 08:24 PM
2

And human beings all have casual sex?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 07:19 PM
5

And you think this because...?
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 07:03 PM
6

You've assumed that most women have had casual sex but I don't think that's true. And if they're choosing not to, that kind of shows it isn't needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/06/26 06:58 PM
3

I've never noticed any man being secretly than me, but given the general lack of men who have been explicitly interested in me, I kind of just assume that there haven't been any men who have been secretly interested.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 06:16 PM
1

If your country has gender discrimination laws for employment, they were likely broken.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:42 AM
1

I used a dating app once! How about you ask out everyone you see to find out how many options you have? Or are you refusing to do what's necessary to actually acquire a relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 10:04 AM
1

I'd say we need to deemphasise beauty entirely. It's okay for women to not be beautiful or pretty. They don't need to be thinking about it all the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 09:03 AM
1

Claiming you have secret options is completely unfalsifiable. You have a hundred options, you've just never explored them and they haven't made themselves known in any way.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 08:49 AM
1

Many have zero at any given time.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/06/26 08:48 AM

I'm not comfortable with sex unless I know someone well, which would be past the point where someone who's just in it for sex would've given up. Having actually interesting conversations and them wanting to spend time with me even when we're not doing anything physical would also indicate they're interested in a relationship in the early stages.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 10:20 PM
1

They want to look like her, and they certainly don't want to look like her for themselves or other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:39 PM
3

In my entire life I've had one option at most.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:38 PM
2

Looking good can make other women dislike you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 08:08 PM
0

We have different opinions. This is a debate subreddit. I am allowed to express feeling differently to you.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:56 PM
0

I get why people tell themselves that. Otherwise it just feels depressing.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:51 PM
0

You should be able to just be already. There's nothing wrong with your skin looking as it is. I used to be into makeup for years. Changing a few small details and colours just isn't very artistic. It's process-based really. You're just romantasising it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:51 PM

You become experienced at bland, genetic sex with people you don't know very well and don't need to please enough to keep...what a catch. Listen to women and they'll tell you they don't find casual sex generally very enjoyable anyway. If you're staying with a partner, they don't care how many different people you can please, they want you to be very good at pleasing them and that's a different skill.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:44 PM
1

I'm sorry you feel the need to go through that for the approval of others. Art is creative and expressive. People do use makeup as art to make themselves look like tigers and aliens...but I'm guessing that you're going for a normal, uncreative look.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:40 PM
2

The reason is that you claimed there was proof!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:34 PM
0

Did I say I had any?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:33 PM
1

You shouldn't have to do that to be left alone by others. Men with your condition don't feel they have to. I'm guessing you're not doing anything wild and different with your makeup that would be artistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:32 PM
1

They can't be picky with only one option. Then it's take it or leave it. Makes them more likely to take it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:31 PM
1

The approval of straight women is not based on how hot you look. Experimenting means testing out things that you will then wear out of the house later, it's just practice. Your husband isn't the only man who will reward you if you look hot and punish you if you don't.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:30 PM
1

I suggest you read it yourself, as it claims the relationship between physical attractiveness and number of sexual partners is practically nonexistent for women...
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:27 PM
1

You're just getting clues as to what it contains, the methodology could be completely messed up and you have no idea.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 07:19 PM
0

Sorry mate, I don't have £41 to spend on it and I'm guessing you didn't pay to read it either. Maybe don't base your claims on information you don't know?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:56 PM
-1

Theres nothing enjoyable about it, straight women don't care how pretty other women look, and it's not like you're going around alone in your house looking at yourself and getting pleasure from it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:54 PM
1

You know how to reference, right? As in you link a study, not an article that refers to it?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:50 PM
2

The general complaint of men on this subreddit is about finding a date in the first place.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:49 PM
-1

Straight women don't wear makeup for themselves or for other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:43 PM
0

That's a bold claim to make without any references!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:41 PM
5

If a woman is less pretty, she's less likely to already be in a relationship or getting any attention and more likely to be desperate. Aren't men here always complaining about women with too many options being too picky? Pick a woman with less options then...or maybe you're picky too.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:39 PM
5

I don't think you do...
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 05:36 PM
3

Outside?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 04:37 PM
6

Duh. Most people are straight.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:44 PM
10

Very few men or women are even asking a hundred different people out every year! That's one person every three and a half days! Be realistic.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:36 PM
-1

They feel they do, you mean.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:34 PM
4

Then you're not looking!
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 03:33 PM
6

As if they're expecting her to hate it and only do it out of obligation...
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 02:23 PM
11

All kinds of men date too. They just complain more about it. I don't expect that many different women to be into me, or any to be honest, because I know most women are straight and wasn't raised to expect women should be into me. I know that dating takes work, and many lesbians and bi women are single for years not by choice.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 02:22 PM
12

And when they don't want to have sex because they're feeling sick it can be called an "excuse".
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 01:27 PM
31

Women also get colds and flus and it wipes them out too. But they tend to still be expected to do some household duties with the same symptoms. Women might be more sympathetic to men's pain if excruciating period pain wasn't dismissed as being "moody" and they weren't expected to carry on working as normal, and if they were believed by doctors and loved ones about pain rather than having it regularly belittled. They're just treating men the same as they would treat women when experiencing sickne…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/06/26 11:17 AM
1

Older men don't make the cut of young women. They care about you being a similar age and still youthful with youthful looks, youthful energy and a youthful sense of fun a lot more than your career or achievements or whatever. (You're unlikely to be the exception who still looks and acts like he's twenty when he's double that age and honestly it'd be a bit embarrassing if you were.) If you want someone who cares about those things, you'll need an older woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 10:05 PM
1

Well yes, people do want their partners to relax when they're able to relax, rather than relaxing for longer. Having more relaxation time than your partner does mean you're not pulling your weight, as you're quite literally spending less time working (at work or home). If you're spending more time relaxing than your partner while your child is a baby, you should look after your child more rather than saying "well it's not my job, I should relax now".
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:59 PM

Men and women can both be mean like this, especially when they're teenagers. You've likely said something bad about a friend at some point.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:56 PM
-1

I've only had two responses when this has happened, they've kind of been obvious from the situation. Either: -If he has a girlfriend, you need to reconsider whether your girlfriend is right for you -If he doesn't have a girlfriend, talk to more women/any women who aren't me
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 09:55 PM
6

They have zero influence. Any influence is incidental such as meeting through friends. Otherwise they will only meet after we've started dating. I know myself and my own taste and I'm not about to listen to someone else's opinion on it. I've never influenced or been asked to influence who anyone else dated either. It's not my business.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 03:36 PM
2

You can't even give a description?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 02:34 PM
4

Oh really? You should be able to give some examples then? Considering that the examples you gave in your post were clearly not the same people.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 01:25 PM
7

Have you ever found any individual who simultaneously holds both views? I think you'd find it really hard. It's almost like different women are different and having a vagina doesn't prescribe all your thoughts and opinions.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 12:34 PM
3

I don't think they found it inferior, they just weren't into it. Not that it makes any sense whatsoever as being bisexual and liking to be dominated are two separate things anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:59 AM
6

I don't believe that sexuality does change, but if he realised he was bi that'd be cool I guess. He's quite camp so there were rumours going around that he was into men when we met, I didn't care and don't care so long as he's not gay (obviously). I'd be kind of concerned about how he only just realised this while in a monogamous relationship though. It implies he has a crush on someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:55 AM
0

Most women aren't talking like that about their sex lives, especially down to the fine details like penis size. I'm guessing that the women who do like to have those conversations have other things in common... (And wouldn't it be a public rather than private piece of information at that point?) Also, how would you know? Do you have dozens of female friends all desperate to tell you the finer details of their sex lives?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:51 AM

When they do have more they have slightly more, but many have more right or centre women. Women tend to swing the same way men with similar characteristics swing. Gender just isn't a political cleavage like class often is.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:48 AM
2

I'm not using the word "threat" in the sense of someone personally threatening you. And the answer is no I would not change as I have explained. I basically don't do anything special for suicide prevention now and having a different option wouldn't make me take it.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/06/26 07:45 AM
4

Yes. I am bisexual though so I don't really experience the gendered nature of attraction that other people seem to.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:32 PM
3

That's their problem I guess. The left-right divide is based on socioeconomic class. If they belong to certain class groups they are typically better off voting left. In most countries there isn't a big left-right gender split. There is usually a big age split though.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:30 PM
9

Stress over household chores has an adverse health impact on women, will you cook for them?
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:28 PM
5

1) No, I don't think the cause of suicide impacts how serious it is. 2) No, I already give plenty of attention to men and it's not like I currently live my life centred around preventing suicide, like I don't volunteer for a suicide prevention charity even though I easily could. I don't think I'd have any special obligation to do anything more in that case. On a societal level, we don't even want to pay more tax to fund mental health services (which actually, you know, help) never mind personall…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:24 PM
4

Well, for a start, how does she know he'll be perfectly fine with it and never bring it up again? (This implies he's someone he regularly interacts with yet seemingly doesn't care about ruining their relationship.) That's not usually what happens. It's just gross and offensive. Would you like your friends, coworkers or whatever offering you random hookups (or, if you're the type to say you're always down for a hookup offer whatever age whatever gender, insert something you don't want, like askin…
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 09:16 PM
8

Different people are different. Some experience this and some don't. It does seem more common in women than men and pretty normal, I don't know if it's the majority though. What complicates things is that regardless of whether you fit the label, attraction is generally felt more strongly the better you know someone, meaning you may initially feel attraction to a stranger but it's so weak you don't even notice or care.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/06/26 02:06 PM
2

It can be seen as such. Just not by you personally.
/r/PurplePillDebate09/06/26 08:27 AM
1

And?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:49 PM
1

I don't think they know much about that likelihood. Knowing human biases, they probably think she's more likely to respond well the more attractive they find her.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:05 PM
2

It's not the norm for women to give the first sign or make the first move.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:02 PM
3

No matter what the current norm for modesty is, there will be demands that women dress more modestly and problems will be blamed on their style of dress.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:28 PM
11

I've talked to hijabi Muslim women who've talked about struggling with beauty standards and sexualisation. It's the system, not the women.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:20 PM
13

When you think you personally are the victim of things you are not a victim of.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 04:33 PM
19

You can't change a system without first acknowledging something is wrong with it. That doesn't mean that those who are disadvantaged by a system are always victims, but it does mean that we could propose changes that help them in whatever aspects they're disadvantaged in. Victim mentality is always seeing yourself, personally, as a victim. It's not acknowledging that society has flaws.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 04:04 PM
3

There are cultures that practice this in modernised society. Currently in the UK I know of families that practice it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:58 PM
2

In many cases it would go very badly (and does in cultures that practice this).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:30 PM
1

On the contrary, they may want to leave before getting their heart broken even more further down the line by a partner who doesn't like them enough to marry them. If you're not marrying your partner because there's apparently nothing in it for you, even though they benefit, it does come across as selfish and like you don't like them never mind love them.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 02:29 PM
0

It happens. They stay longer than they should, but in the end they leave.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:52 PM
2

Why would shaming promiscuity mean your mum would get involved in your dating life? (And manage to do a good job.)
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:05 PM
0

Someone that does like you still often won't stay without marriage.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 01:04 PM
5

The more promiscuity is shamed, the more she would've felt she was stuck with one of them rather than being able to move on to someone else.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 12:13 PM
6

Not all of the benefits. They won't get marriage-specific financial protections or a greater assurance that their relationship will last. And they benefit from marriage if their partner won't stay and provide them value without it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 12:10 PM
1

You can at most have one man's experience, not many men's experiences.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 10:02 AM
2

And you are just one man, not "men", so you don't really have much of an advantage in knowing what happens to men in general unless men secretly have a hive mind.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 09:56 AM
2

How are either of us going to know what's being done privately?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 09:55 AM
4

On nowhere near the same scale. Men shame male virgins and gay and bi men the most.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:51 AM
2

It could work. We don't know as it hasn't been tried. Men are shamed for not having sex in nowhere near the scale that women are shamed for having it. Why are they staying this preference in so public a way as to be attacked? Did anyone ask, was it appropriate?
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:20 AM
9

It's often just about compatibility. Many people don't like the idea of sleeping around and don't want their partner to have slept around either. And for men, sleeping with a virgin is often seen as an achievement which they can use for individual or social validation.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:07 AM
0

You mean they care about it as much as men in dating, yet they are far less likely to shame anyone over it.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 08:06 AM
5

Men benefit from marriage more, but they have similar benefits from being in a long-term live-in relationship, perhaps with children, without the ring or legal protection for someone who's likely sacrificing their income for them. Those arrangements are likely where women get the shortest end of the stick, who would prefer to get married to have some assurance that their partner won't walk away one day and make them lose everything (as opposed to a divorce where they just lose a whole lot).
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:12 AM
2

If you're to say that all women have sex offers, you must be counting sexual harassment, catcalling, dick pics, etc as sex offers. Those are certainly "contaminated water", not safe to follow up on. (If they're even genuine offers which of course they aren't.)
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:06 AM
1

I don't think you do. They are different words that mean different things!
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 06:03 AM
2

Many women have no offers. Many people are currently single. Few people are forever single, especially against their will.
/r/PurplePillDebate08/06/26 05:56 AM
4

What is this "access"? Many women have no offers at the moment. The vast majority of women do have relationships and sex at some point, but so do the vast majority of men.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 09:42 PM
10

Usually, men do the pursuing and asking out. Most men don't have the time or inclination to pursue or ask out any large number of women. Therefore the number of women they select to interact with romantically is going to be relatively small. It certainly won't be all women and they're likely to have certain features in common, as it's not like men choose who to pursue and ask out at random. And they often have features in common with the women other men choose to pursue and ask out, as men's tas…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 08:23 PM
2

You could try looking up the basics and see how it feels, all you need to start is a hook and yarn.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 05:35 PM

Realistically the choice is between: 1) Keeping your relationship with the mother of your child, as there's not really any coming back from this 2) Knowing that you are the biological parent of your child to a higher degree of certainty I guess it's up to you what's more life ruining or what's a higher risk. If you have no particular reason to believe they cheated or were otherwise sleeping with someone else unprotected while you were trying for a baby, you'd likely prefer choosing your relation…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:59 PM

It is unfortunate they we can't always have our loved ones there during medical procedures even if we want them to be, but there are reasons for this, many of them perfectly legitimate. I assume if you were your wife's wife you wouldn't be allowed in either so it's nothing to do with misandry. If your wife was medically abused there are things you can do like make a complaint or sue people involved. I'm not sure what you'd expect you could've done during the procedure.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:16 PM

It's not exactly easy as it puts your whole relationship at risk. And if you think they're cheating it won't be able to reassure you otherwise, although to be honest, if you think they're cheating so much you're checking this, your relationship is probably hanging on by a thread anyway. You don't need to check what you already know. And if you chose to have a child with this person you should already know they're not cheating and lying about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 04:14 PM

A paternity test is not that button. All it means is that you are the biological father of that baby. Your partner could still cheat on you past, present or future. They could've even cheated while you were trying for a baby, they just didn't conceive with the affair partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:50 PM

I don't want to attack your character here but I think this says something and I'll leave it at that.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:48 PM

It's so insulting to say you have trust issues and think your partner is actively cheating on you at this time, yet expect them to trust you enough to let you impregnate them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:46 PM

It's not misandry to not be allowed in the room with a loved one as they, not you, are undergoing a medical procedure. I'm sorry that happened and that something went wrong (?) but it's not misandry and women don't need their partners in the room during such procedures to somehow protect them.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:44 PM
1

Me too! I'm also an advanced crocheter. Activities that involve repetitive movements are often easier for those with dyspraxia.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 03:38 PM

Have you ever been married or in a long term relationship?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:48 AM
3

A lot of people take the condoms as souvenirs so who knows how many were actually used.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:44 AM
1

If he wanted to learn to crochet and joined a group, the women there would be all over him.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:42 AM

Being offended that a loved one who you've chosen to have a child with thinks you cheated and demands proof you didn't when you're at your most vulnerable isn't being a "piece of shit". It's being quite human, actually. And I'm asking how the aforementioned person accusing their partner of cheating is supposed to recover that relationship. You may think they have a right to ask but obviously even if they're allowed to do so it's going to damage their partner's trust in them to a point that may b…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:39 AM

You know that's not true.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:34 AM
2

If they think they're such a minority group that needs support, they can very well go what everyone else does and form their own group instead of feeling entitled to the protection of others.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:32 AM

I think the fairest thing is to make sure all male DNA is on record so we can always find who the father is and hand him a bill for child maintenance if needed.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:30 AM

Say your partner of several years who you've just had a child with asked you for an STD test as they think you might have recently cheated on them and just want to make sure their health isn't at risk. Oh yeah, and you've just had surgery that you're in a long process of recovering from. Are you telling me you wouldn't even hesitate? (How do you even come back from that when it turns out the baby is biologically yours? "Hey, I still think you could've cheated while we were trying for a baby, goo…
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 11:26 AM
1

I don't think it's that concerning that if you're seen as rude someone else might be rude back.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 09:07 AM
2

I don't think anyone can really accurately say how misogynist, racist, etc they are themselves. They need an outside perspective.
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 08:48 AM
2

Do you think they are being rude when they didn't perceive the other person as rude?
/r/PurplePillDebate07/06/26 08:46 AM
2

Nobody said anything about hate. I didn't use the word and neither did the poll. I just don't think most men know what a positive opinion of women actually looks like and don't think we should take self-ratings as gospel for this kind of thing.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 10:22 PM
5

Different people have different perceptions of what is overtly rude.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 10:19 PM
0

More likely to report it you mean. Misogyny is so widespread that it's not usually recognised as such and many misogynists believe they love women.
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 10:14 PM

If you personally don't like women you don't have to date them. I certainly wouldn't recommend it with such a clear hateful opinion of them. If you don't find yourself falling in love with someone, nobody can make you. Men tend to like their partners and their partners like them back. They form strong emotional connections based on liking each other as people and putting time and effort into their relationships. They enjoy talking to each other about things that interest them. While some relatio…
/r/PurplePillDebate06/06/26 10:09 PM
18

Cherry picking? I don't think you know what is the most popular. These things are huge. The Traitors is possibly the most popular show in the UK right now. And it's not cherry picking if these are literally the most recent shows I talked about, the last time someone said anything to me about Love Island was 2019 and I don't know anyone who watches Euphoria.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 11:56 PM
23

Because you're ignoring the other media they consume, I guess. The last media I discussed with women were Eurovision, The Testaments, Project Hail Mary, Wicked and The Traitors.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 09:54 PM
3

There is no "women's music", you are talking about female singers. Female singers are told they should be sexual and talk about sexual things to appeal to men. This is probably true. I don't like pop music but the other half listens to it and has both men and women on who sing about sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 09:51 PM
2

I fit that category and I would not. I don't think that's what marriage is and I believe that policy is enforced marital rape, requiring sex even when one or both people don't want it. I don't want to rape my husband and he doesn't want to rape me.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 09:48 PM

I certainly don't agree on that, but regardless, I think we can both agree it's not about gay rights.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 02:45 PM

You're conflating feminists and lesbians. Being one does not entail being the other and while their equal rights movements have overlap they are distinct. The evidence of their straightness is that they are only attracted to men. You're trying to find the reason for their straightness, and nobody has ever found a comclusive reason for straightness and I'm not entirely sure they can.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:23 PM

I've asked quite a few men about it (I'm bi and pretty curious about what makes the difference) and they've often been more vague or said vibes. I'm not sure there is a "proper answer", certainly not in every case - sexuality is just messy like that. Comphet isn't a feminist theory and it's also not about people who actually are straight.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:19 PM

What you're asking is why are many people straight, and we don't really know that or what makes the distinction so someone will be attracted to the opposite sex but not the same. When straight women try to explain it, sometimes it's about bodies, sometimes it's about vibes or something, and often they're not really sure why they just like men but they do. Which is similar to straight men's responses to be honest.
/r/PurplePillDebate05/06/26 01:13 PM
1

The only use of your nationality in dating is being able to give nationality or residency with less checks to your partner. Something you offer to give to someone to try to get them to date you is just a bribe and it won't actually make them like you. Otherwise you're not using your nationality in dating, you're just sort of...having it and also dating. (Like, I'm sure my husband enjoys having greater EU access after marrying me but that's coincidental really.)
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 02:27 PM
0

No, I'm knocking them for claiming that whole countries of people are better or worse options because I do not believe that any nationality or race is superior to another and I think it's wrong to stereotype. If you want a partner who shares your values I don't know how you'd find the solipsism to think you're the only person in your whole country with those values. Your last two paragraphs are too specific to your locality for me to get what you're on about I fear.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 12:45 PM
2

Could you give some examples?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:58 AM
0

For clarity, I count a "passport bro" as any man who specifically wants (whether or not they are actively looking) a partner from a different country due to positive beliefs about people from that country, negative beliefs about people for their own country, or both. Most people whose partner is from a different country to themselves do not fall into this category (and indeed I am married to someone from a different country to myself and neither of us are passport people).
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 11:32 AM
1

I'm not saying it's impossible. Although I think many of these stories exaggerate how much the young person did to make it look better. Many would say in that situation the older person should just shut it down.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 09:33 AM
5

They mock American women relentlessly. That is why American women are mocking them back. I doubt you only mock people you're attracted to.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:40 AM
1

Are any of these men at all bringing up Germany as a location where they want to go?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:37 AM
1

Even if he finds the most wonderful and respectful relationship in his country of choosing (unlikely), you don't see the problem with negatively generalising every single woman in an entire country?
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:35 AM
2

You're conflating two things here: 1) Up until a certain age, women tend to prefer and date men a couple of years older than them. 2) Many people are concerned about large age gaps of many years and how this may affect relationship quality, particularly when the younger party is in their early twenties or younger. Conversely, I never have observed a large age gap relationship where the younger party pursued it themselves. Although I also haven't observed that many as they don't tend to like it a…
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:12 AM
1

You're saying that with a lot of confidence when I'm guessing you don't actually know of any of these cases, much less what "most countries" do.
/r/PurplePillDebate04/06/26 08:08 AM
0

Women also get arrested for assault (if police are involved, they usually aren't no matter the gender of those involved in the altercation). It's equally illegal, they just don't do it as often, and when they do it tends to be with less damage (which also determines sentencing, not just "who started it" which often can't be known by police). There are the same legal consequences for hitting a man and hitting a woman so I suggest not doing either.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 09:29 PM
1

I'm not entirely sure what you think would be the difference if a woman physically fought a man.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 08:30 PM
10

It's called summarising.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 04:43 PM
19

Thinking men don't experience the same emotions as other people is weird.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 03:14 PM
22

Some of them even think anger has a different function for men like they're not human or something!
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 03:04 PM
47

Men also tend to think their emotions are somehow special or different from other people's, for example thinking they experience anger differently when really it's just more accepted for them to have larger angry outbursts.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:55 PM
41

Men are I think usually very out of touch about how emotional men are. I think they just don't read emotional behaviours as such when men do them, preferring see them as logic-based or just not considering the reasoning behind them at all.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 02:30 PM
1

Going to another country won't make them appear.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 12:48 PM
2

I've talked to hijabi Muslim women who also mention being evaluated mainly by their appearance, not being treated as an intelligent human being, and receiving unwanted sexual attention. Changing clothing won't change the overall framework of how women are treated. It's not about what you wear, that is just an excuse. A leg or a shoulder is just a body part. You're perfectly capable of treating someone like a person when it is displayed and many people do this as part of their professional career…
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 08:44 AM
0

I'm just thinking of people I've seen out and about.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 08:09 AM
3

The same reason you see men do things like this I suppose. (Recently I've seen them out and about doing that with their children with them as well.) Bad tempers, accustomed to violence, and often drug or alcohol use. At least in these cases it was only a threat. Who knows if anyone would've followed through. If you get other people involved they might refuse.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 06:59 AM
1

Because people from outside your country are lesser and worse?
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 06:56 AM
1

If there is truly someone who is so dreadful that nobody in an entire country is attracted to them, they're not going to improve things by trying another country.
/r/PurplePillDebate03/06/26 06:43 AM
0

I doubt anyone has actually exhausted all the options in their entire country or anywhere close.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 09:31 PM
1

There's an abundance of women of all types in every country.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 08:54 PM
1

That's a person, not a country. (Not that what you want is necessarily what you're compatible with anyway.)
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 07:31 PM
1

You actually can't control what your vagina responds to. It's not about shame, it just sort of responds to anything sexual whether or not you like or want it. Happens to all women to some extent, they don't need therapy for being women.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:46 PM
1

You don't seriously think that's going to work out for either person in that arrangement do you? Their whole reason for doing so (and claiming an entire country of women are better, more submissive, better looking, whatever) is based on racist, sexist and classist stereotyping, not actually looking for a compatible partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 04:44 PM
1

Responding physically to it doesn't mean you like it or choose to watch it, particularly for women. Women who were against watching porn wouldn't sign up to the study anyway.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:37 PM
1

You're seriously considering my experience to be unbelievable?
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:35 PM
0

So no change!
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:34 PM
0

So they won't look at me like I have two heads when I do it. Excellent.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 03:33 PM

Many people go on rather a lot of first dates these days, might as well do something they enjoy and wanted to do anyway instead of the same thing every time. When you're doing something fun you will show yourself in a better light anyway. And being creative means you can avoid paying for a whole dinner.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 08:37 AM

Generally that's in response to questions like how can men find women to date. Generic questions get generic answers. If you want dating advice specific to you, find someone who actually knows you.
/r/PurplePillDebate02/06/26 08:33 AM
8

Since when did including someone entail including them personally in your vagina?
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:17 PM
11

There is substantially more danger than usual if you are a woman travelling on her own.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:14 PM
9

Hooking up with random foreign men?! Do you think women are generally insane?! The differences with the female solo travel experience tend to be looking out for safety a lot more. They tend to form groups and not go to random men's houses.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:12 PM
14

Travelling anywhere alone as a woman is dangerous. There are dangerous men in any country.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:09 PM
2

Yes, it is stupid. Stop chasing, she doesn't want you and would prefer to be left alone.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:06 PM
1

Hey, I was snatched by the arm one time in a club in Oxford! Many women have similar stories, and not just from "rough" areas. I've approached before (the aforementioned is the closest I've come to being approached), but only warm or lukewarm approaches, and if do the same as a man. They tend to have a higher success rate so I'd probably be okay at it.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 06:04 PM
6

Yes. I even think you can be fully platonic friends with someone you're attracted to, as that doesn't mean you have to act on it. Although of course nobody is attracted to absolutely everyone of the opposite sex. If straight men and women can't be fully platonic friends, then as a bisexual either: 1) I somehow have a special ability to keep friendships platonic that straight people don't, or 2) I'm incapable of having a fully platonic friendship Neither of which I believe.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:23 AM

Because women love minimum wage jobs of course. Working as a waitress is really everyone's dream.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/06/26 05:19 AM

Have you forgotten that women also have jobs that they're often not passionate about? Most people find it helps to have fun outside of work if they don't like work all that much.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:48 PM

If we're talking about young people on the dating scene now, we're talking about their grandmothers.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:46 PM

Men currently on the dating scene generally aren't 51.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:10 PM

They don't really.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:04 PM

This would be a better argument for men who ever knew any different.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:54 PM

They can't adjust to something that changed when their mums were babies? I think that's a them problem. Seriously, with anything else we'd say going back to the 70s state would be the thing that would take some adjusting.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:54 PM

I don't know about American history, but that's still decades! Today's young men haven't known women not having bank accounts at any point in their lives. How much adjustment time do they need?!
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:27 PM

How someone has sex is one of the least important things in deciding whether they're "better" or not. You'd learn a lot more from a deep conversation than a hookup. Do you think people only started leaving their village in 2000?
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:10 PM

All sources point to young people sleeping around less. It's a common complaint of "male loneliness crisis" advocates. You just said they wouldn't know there are "superior" men and think he was the best, you don't need to have sex with someone to find out that information. And birth control pills have been around since my granny was a child.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 07:03 PM

Very new? I was born in 2002. Women have been able to sustain themselves with jobs my whole lifetime and a long enough time before I'd imagine.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 06:57 PM

There's nobody alive today whose mum didn't know any men other than their dad, and today's young people are less promiscuous than their parents. (I wonder if you think promiscuous men are less happy?)
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 06:55 PM

That is what relationships are about. They previously weren't about that, as women often had to be in them for a stable income so didn't have the luxury of only going for relationships they liked. Evidently they're not about money any more as women are choosing to be in them even when they have jobs and can live on their own if they wish. Things change.
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 06:51 PM
1

Sometimes abusers can appear to have exceptional personalities. I've known a couple of people who I later found out (reliably) were abusing someone. They came across as perfectly lovely, friendly and charming. I never would've guessed it was them. It's a well-known tactic of abusers to act extra lovely until their victim is/feels trapped, and to love bomb in between incidents of abuse so you feel there is a wonderful partner hidden in there. Other people might be drawn into more obvious abuse. I…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:51 AM
4

My parents came of age during the Troubles and married a year after, when they were 30 and 32. I'm not sure they were any more or less successful than me but they did have different goals. I know they both dated around a lot when they were younger and neither had any shortage of dates (surprising perhaps as my dad is pretty shy). In contrast, only one person has ever showed me any interest but all I've wanted is to find someone to marry. I do have the handicap of being bisexual which has meant I…
/r/PurplePillDebate31/05/26 09:27 AM

Relying on a novelty or mystery factor only works in the short term, as you're going to find out about each other after dating and marriage. For long term compatibility, it's much better to realise your partner is human just like you and know them well and about what you have in common. Even if you've known other people of their gender before, getting to know them is obviously still important. And apart from some very select societies, men and women have always coexisted really. They've wanted t…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:32 AM
-1

Abolishing then without much thought behind it generally leads to women doing all the work. Putting thought into it would entail giving each person some roles and expectations, regardless of which gender is "meant" to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:26 AM
3

The dating sphere still isn't equal. Women, despite generally having jobs that contribute to household income and planning and organising and performing plenty, still do substantially more unpaid household labour and childcare, are expected to put substantially greater effort into their appearance for men, and have to put up with generally being treated as a second in command rather than equal partner.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:20 AM
1

Depends on whether you have nice tits.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:13 AM
2

Those are different women for a start. Women are not all the same. And the normal thing to do in that situation would be to look and then move on.
/r/PurplePillDebate30/05/26 09:11 AM

I'm not at all. I don't watch it. I know that it's simply designed to be addictive and most who watch see things and people they wouldn't dream of doing. If men are attracted to what's in the porn they watch that says very very bad things about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 07:06 PM

It really doesn't mean that at all but okay.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:59 PM

Watching porn of some type of person doesn't mean you want to date them. They're seen as a novelty, a bit of taboo for entertainment.
/r/PurplePillDebate29/05/26 06:41 PM
0

How dare I debate people on a debate subreddit...
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 04:51 PM
2

It brings you what you want to see. You want to see things to get angry at.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:04 PM
1

And being a man is totally holding you back, right?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:02 PM
1

You've curated an algorithm to show you extremist comment on a website that's already being primarily used by extremists these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 03:01 PM
3

You want to be given presents or prizes? Is more respect and opportunities not enough for you?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:42 PM
1

I'm 24 and you and I both know that isn't remotely true.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:41 PM
3

Most attraction isn't based solely on looks, especially if it's more than a passing lust that's quick to fade.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:30 PM
2

Our first impressions of people aren't set in stone, and if you've just met whatever you might think about them right off the bat is most likely going to be quite different to what you think once you know anything about them. Giving someone a chance means you think you could be attracted once you have some more information about them, but you just don't know them yet. And yes, getting to know someone will take some amount of effort, which some people are more willing to put in than others (if th…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:19 PM
1

Generalisations like...? Women usually bend over backwards when talking about men to say it's not all men and they know some lovely men and men can be great and they still get dogpiled half the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:16 PM

No way is that man going to genuinely treat all fifty of those women like a potential partner. At a push, he might treat five if them that way. "Average" means being in the middle of a data set, not being the middle of your preferences within that set.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 02:15 PM
2

I'm not okay with either, but if I had to choose between shit and dog shit I'd rather have the man who hasn't shown he's okay with paying women to have sex with him when they don't want to and doesn't give a shit about their welfare.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 01:42 PM
3

Women aren't valued for being able to have children if they don't actually do it, which is harder than most things men could be valued for.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 01:32 PM
3

It is seen as good to be like a man and it is seen as bad to be like a woman. That's textbook misogyny.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:23 PM
4

You're only valued for your "factory" and even then you aren't given as much value as other people. Men complaining about women being valued for motherhood while men are valued for anything they do, and even start with a higher default just for having a penis (whereas women are seen as default "weak" and devoid of any value outside their uteruses for some reason), are the ones complaining about buttery lobsters.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:19 PM
6

Say if someone said "I don't like that Irish people have bad tempers". I don't have a bad temper, but I am Irish so it would bother me that someone was generalising about Irish people like that, and also that they were singing us out while others could have bad tempers too.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 12:16 PM
14

If you say "women do X", it's directed at women. It implies you think all women do X so it's directed at them all.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 10:03 AM
15

It is directed at you if you are a woman and it's directed at women. If you're only concerned with a particular group or behaviour then criticise that instead of criticising "women". You even specified in your OP you were criticising "women's collective behaviour".
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:58 AM
7

But you're considered to lose value if you don't have children, don't have enough children, aren't having children any more, etc. And there's a limit to how much you can be valued in the first place as an incubator, it's a lot less than if you're valued for other things.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:52 AM
14

I think it's everyone's duty to step in when others are making unkind generalisations about large groups of people. I'm white, and if someone is being racist or "criticising" another race then I think it often is my job as a human being to step in. No, you don't develop "self-awareness" from people making broad criticism about you that likely don't even apply, it's just an environment for (self-)hatred to grow.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:48 AM
3

I think it's the major part, especially if you consider straight couples with adopted children. Women having weakened expectations to put in more effort with their children and being defined by motherhood less would be no loss, but I don't think artificial wombs would do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:41 AM
7

Not to do with the larger amount of time mothers usually spend raising their children?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:28 AM
6

Why? Do you think motherhood is exclusively or mainly about pregnancy and birth?
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:23 AM
8

But you can still be a mum and have children, you just don't need to gestate and give birth.
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 09:09 AM
15

The ability to have children really holds women back actually. Being valued for their ability to have children isn't pleasant as they're reduced to only or primarily that and their actual skills, talents and personalities are ignored. Women don't want to be begged for babies. Artificial wombs would take away a huge burden of having to go through so much physical, emotional and financial damage to have children that men don't. That would give women so much, and being more equivalent to a man give…
/r/PurplePillDebate28/05/26 08:16 AM
3

Well, yes, but that's what happens in a culture where sexualising women is the default and everyone is expected to do it at least a bit. When women do it they're just following cultural norms that reflect a straight mdle perspective, which is not their own.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 12:48 PM
1

That's your opinion, not mine.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 12:47 PM
1

If I cheated on someone then I clearly can't have respected them very much in the first place. I don't think there would be any left to lose. My respect for someone does not decrease if I see them as weak or feminine and I don't think forgiveness is weak or feminine.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 09:03 AM
-2

Approaching random women is a waste of time, but approaching non-random women is often the easiest route to success. No way do you actually think people are more honest on dating apps, and let me remind you there are several times more men than women using them.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:27 AM
3

OP says red pullers just get their views from reading and watching things that agree with their views, not through any exposure to opposing views. I've noticed they also don't really engage with opposing views or take them seriously, just dismiss them outright as brainwashing and lies.
/r/PurplePillDebate27/05/26 08:23 AM
8

I don't know what points you think those are. You say yourself all you've looked at to inform your views are red pill opinions so I'm not surprised you haven't cared to look at studies that disagree with you.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:45 PM
14

Studies aren't red pill or blue pill. They're about specific things, and don't assume an ideology to start if they're of any use.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:33 PM
16

You've never seen a study on here? Are you new?
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 08:11 PM
13

Many of them have already been shared on this subreddit if you're interested. I don't keep a running list of everything I've read to hand.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 07:58 PM
32

From people, books and studies/statistics that agree and disagree with me, as well as my own observation and critical thought. The way you're describing red pill men getting "information" is known as an echo chamber - you're seeking out only opinions that agree with you so your own voice echoes back.
/r/PurplePillDebate26/05/26 07:55 PM
1

But why won't they please the other man? If they're in a relationship they still want to keep him, they're clearly not totally repulsed. If they're not enjoying themselves anyway then doing something different won't make them enjoy it any less.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 04:21 PM
6

He wouldn't be insecure or offended and I generally am into people who are pretty similar to each other, not really sure why you assumed otherwise. It's just quite gross to say to someone you're in a relationship with that you're attracted to other people. You just don't bring it up in conversation because they don't want to know, same as you don't tell them how many times you shat this week.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 04:15 PM
1

If they don't enjoy sex at all then why not do those acts? They might as well if they won't enjoy it regardless. Doesn't matter the "value", if they chose to have sex at all why not the kind of sex their partner wants?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 04:12 PM
1

Not really, no. I have in the past not mentioned certain things I thought I might like but didn't think he'd like (we're pretty into a couple of BDSM things), but over time we've discussed them when talking about new things to try. I don't talk about other people I could be into, though. I think that's just disrespectful, obviously we aren't each other's exclusive type but it doesn't do anyone any good to hear about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:18 PM

I think that you should generally believe what people say without good reason to do otherwise is all.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 03:02 PM
7

Have a go yourself. Playing with your gag reflex is not fun. Idk what physical pleasure he could get out of oral so feeling no pleasure would be not only fine but expected. Physical pleasure isn't the same as being hard though, not sure why you conflated them.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:41 PM

I just answered you.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:19 PM
7

Usually by doing things like deepthroating. And it's not easy if you have a gag reflex (it really doesn't even feel the best for either party compared to other methods that aren't just using the mouth as a vagina replacement that's less good). Try swallowing a dildo until it hits the back of your throat repeatedly and get back to me. If you're concentrating on making it good you tend to just look like you're concentrating. Oral is generally something you do for someone else's enjoyment as obviou…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 02:18 PM

That is what wanting peace means, yes.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:53 PM
8

That's usually the way of it in porn no?
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:53 PM
1

I'm two years married while most of my peers are single or casually dating, I never wanted a "traditional" relationship as it makes no sense for my skills and sounds horrible for me personally. No need to force yourself into a box for the sake of "tradition".
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:52 PM
9

I don't think anyone deserves submission. At no point do you earn the right to have authority over another capable adult. It doesn't even help your relationship as things go a lot more smoothly when both parties feel fully in control of their own choices and take responsibility for their own actions, it's a partnership at the end of the day. A wise king deserves a wise queen who can be trusted to take care of things by herself without being ordered around. Successful men usually have capable par…
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:47 PM
24

If a man is powerful enough he usually doesn't feel a need for his partner to submit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:43 PM
8

Do you mean deepthroating? Because that is often too much if you don't want to vomit.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:41 PM

Women who want peace definitely shouldn't be actively looking for a date, as they just want to be left alone with no date.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:39 PM
1

So they don't enjoy sex at all but they do enjoy these particular sex acts they did before but won't do now... make it make sense.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 01:34 PM
2

If you like a certain sex act, and you like someone at least enough to have sex with them at all, why wouldn't you have sex with them the way you prefer and do the acts you actually like? I don't get it. The obvious conclusion is that they didn't really like that sex act.
/r/PurplePillDebate25/05/26 09:18 AM
1

He's present at the making playing a critical role! And he can also influence how his child is treated.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 08:30 PM
1

It's funny that people you match with on dating apps don't read or don't care that much about your political views? Liberal means moderate in my political system but I'm guessing you live somewhere it means left.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 08:18 PM
1

It is when you're doing more than your share.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:40 PM
1

If doing housework and childcare is just her job and doing paid work is just his job then he's not paying her for sex is he? They're just doing their jobs.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:51 PM
4

It's much more simple than that. Most straight men don't want to date trans women even if nobody was stopping them. (They don't tend to change their behaviour to reflect who women want them to date for any other reason.) They may see them as men, or they may see certain features as less attractive that trans women are more likely to have than cis women.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:44 PM
4

If she's working the same hours it's her job to do half the household work. If she works a bit less then it's her job to do a bit more, not all of it. And of course, this goes for men who work less too. It's called teamwork.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:38 PM
3

A woman can say it as clearly as possible and will still be told she doesn't really mean it or she shouldn't expect that.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:29 PM
4

I think men would complain about it, stress about it, and ultimately do nothing about it or get any closer to the standard. That's the normal trend with such things.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:27 PM
6

As a function of being a parent and living there too she's obliged to do half, as her husband is also a parent who lives there too. And it usually won't be to as high a standard.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:26 PM
3

Women who are like this don't get this kind of treatment from men. They just get asked for more usually. How dare women not want to do thankless work and tell others how they feel? What absolute sheep! They never would've thought of that if someone else hadn't said it first! Men must be so sheepish as they basically all refuse to do that amount of unpaid labour and discourage other men from doing the same.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:21 PM
1

Their father is also failing to look after them properly and continually choosing to do so.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:18 PM
45

The trad wife arrangement is that women do all the household labour and childcare, usually to a far higher than normal standard (e.g. home cooked meals always, homeschooling, spotless house). That's what she's paid for, not sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:48 PM
-1

Lucky her.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 01:41 PM
1

Yep.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:28 AM
0

A lot of dominant women would say there aren't enough submissive men to go around...
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:25 AM
3

It's still your choice to do it or not. Even if they want it you can just say no. "Choking" is a hard limit for me, I'm never going to say yes to strangling someone. Even if I put in the work to do it "safely" there are still very big risks and you're basically guaranteed to give them permanent damage which would absolutely be your fault.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:24 AM
1

You don't get interest, you get gross, harassing messages. You also get men expressing interest in dominating you.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:21 AM
2

I'm guessing you're confusing a higher proportion of women who watch porn liking aggressive and violent porn, with a higher proportion of people who like aggressive and violent porn being women. A lot fewer women watch porn in the first place and the number of women who like violent and aggressive porn is lower than the number of men who do. I'm guessing it's a higher proportion of women who watch porn as being into violent and aggressive kinks may be an incentive to start watching, whereas near…
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:19 AM

Not to be dramatic but I'd rather just die a couple of years earlier and actually get to enjoy my life and live it as my own.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:14 AM
1

Very rarely do you hear people in real conversations describing actual people this way. It sounds more like how you'd talk about or market a book or film. My type is people who are kind, gentle, honest, loyal, and intelligent. It's not a trope though.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 06:10 AM
2

Threatening someone with bad consequences if they don't do what you want is very much controlling. The whole point of the threat is to try to control them to do the thing. If you just left without the threat beforehand then it wouldn't influence their actions so wouldn't be controlling.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 05:09 AM
1

I don't think it's a mercy killing, which should be held to a far higher standard. You're choosing not to have a child in the first place, before abortion cutoffs it doesn't even have the brain development to miss being alive. If a child has a shitty life that is absolutely their father's fault as well as their mother's.
/r/PurplePillDebate24/05/26 04:53 AM

They're not concerned about their husbands leaving them if they don't do chores, they're concerned about not having clean plates to eat their next meal off of or clean clothes to wear tomorrow. Chores are done because they're essential, not just because your husband is fussy over them. And you can't very well take a break until somebody does this essential thing. In the case of childcare you just can't really take any breaks. (Also, home cooked meals a few times a week is several hours of work i…
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:30 PM
3

I think it's often the right decision to have an abortion. No, you aren't good for bringing a child you can't or won't care for into the world just to make yourself feel better. They're not going to feel sad or miss existing if they never even developed a brain, a foetus doesn't trust anything as it doesn't have that ability, but if you do go ahead and give birth to them you could bring them pain.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:26 PM

I don't think they do in particular. People's looks standards don't tend to be that related to how they look themselves. Men like this have a range of types. My husband (although I'd say he's crazy hot) would fit this description and I don't think my looks are anything special.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:40 PM
0

People don't get therapy usually unless they have some kind of specific mental health issue. I wouldn't say it's needed in particular.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 07:28 PM
0

Men with this kind of attitude often end up wondering why they feel like shit all the time, just saying.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 06:53 PM
1

You only brought it up to try to dismiss the issue at hand. We're not here to discuss child labour. You didn't ask me what I thought of those children and it's not relevant so I didn't say. They've basically all been raped and abused in the industry. Money doesn't fix that.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 06:09 PM
1

By that logic you can't ever care about any issues as there's always something worse. Well very few of them are millionaires but the lucky porn actors who are would I assume become models or something. I just feel sorry for them.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:30 PM
1

Yes they are. Only a lucky few make anything at all, but I'm certainly not in support of the few celebrities making lots of money from it and promoting it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:20 PM
1

Many people do. I'd imagine many more would if others were actively watching and enjoying child labour, even masturbating to it. Porn hits pretty hard for more people in developed countries due to its actors also often living in developed countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 05:18 PM
5

There are many male users with AI girlfriends on r/myboyfriendisai. The subreddit name isn't that prescriptive. Women would ideally like a real, physical man but if they're lonely and longing for emotional connection they might go for an AI imaginary companion so they at least feel they get something. Many people who "date" AI are in real relationships as well, so they have a partner with a body but feel they're missing something.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:41 PM
0

I'm 24. My granny was born in the baby boom. Just because someone said something caused anxiety once and were wrong doesn't mean nothing causes anxiety. There are a lot of studies showing phone use is associated with anxiety (note that association is a bit different from cause, there will be some reverse causality here I'd suspect).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:36 PM
4

I've never come across someone who has actually been "burned" in any way by someone who didn't want to do a particular sex act with them that they'd tried before. Many people with this viewpoint have never had sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:35 PM
3

I'd say the only ethical thing to do is stop watching.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:26 PM
1

To get those 0.5s you divided each number by 2 first (so you found the mean in one more step than you needed which was kind of confusing). Dividing by 2 then dividing by 5 is dividing by 10.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:25 PM
2

They do say so and then people with this viewpoint think "I don't like that" means "I actually really like that, but because I'm not attracted to you despite willingly having sex with you I'm not going to do this thing I love".
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:22 PM
1

All porn use is associated with domestic and sexual violence. Even if every performer consented (you really think a form guarantees consent lol), it could still do something to the brains of the watchers, the same as phone use is associated with anxiety even though the phones aren't anxious.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:20 PM
3

That's a big assumption, as if they liked it they'd then want to do it again. Many people like to ignore easy answers when it doesn't fit a narrative.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 03:17 PM
2

I'll wait.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:38 PM
7

If she's attracted enough to have sex, she's attracted enough to have sex she actually likes. If she likes a certain kink she will want to do it.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:34 PM
7

You know you could just try something and not like it? And that being pressured into particular sex acts is incredibly common?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:32 PM
5

Having more money is objectively better than having less money.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:29 PM
2

I'm guessing we're just going off your feelings as the source for this?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:28 PM
1

You divided the male average by 5, the number of men, and the female average by 10, the number of encounters. So you're not finding comparable averages here. Your maths is just not right.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 01:24 PM
1

The women have 50% average condom usage (5/10 of their encounters used condoms). The men also have 50% average condom usage (5/10 of their encounters used condoms).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 12:32 PM
8

I think those who say it's cheating are trying to be taken more seriously by using a word that most would see as serious. It's like feeling cheated on for alcohol when dating an alcoholic. It's hard to express the feeling when so many insist that porn just isn't a big deal. Again, if someone genuinely thinks watching a video has higher sex appeal than sex, very few would see them as worth dating.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 10:02 AM
3

If you knew nothing about the conditions of any other restaurant, logically speaking your best assumption would be that they're the same (until proven otherwise of course).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:58 AM
3

If you can't prove a change then we must assume the status quo still holds. What changes are so drastic? It seems like there are just some more smaller businesses compared to bigger businesses in porn now (although studios are still very much on the scene).
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:13 AM
6

I guess the difference is that we have a special standard of consent for sex that's higher than, say, making a burger. And we usually don't want to be getting off to someone doing something sexually that we think they don't want to do.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:10 AM
8

It used to be teenager years. Now it's more common for children to first be exposed to porn with single digit ages.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:08 AM
7

Porn isn't competition. Women aren't pictures or videos, and if someone genuinely sees watching a video of sex as an actual competitor for having sex they're too far gone into porn addiction for anyone to knowingly want to date them. Many women don't like porn because it develops misogyny, domestic/sexual violence, and addiction. And different women watch porn themselves. Porn isn't masturbation. But it's so ingrained in culture that many people genuinely seem to not be able to think they could …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:07 AM
3

How do you know that changing the way that porn is made slightly will make the conditions somehow change dramatically and in a positive way? (Views expressed in something that advertises or accompanies porn content don't count.) It's on you to show there's a change, otherwise we have to assume that conditions are similar to the most similar situations we know of. But I'm guessing it's just an assumption you've made to make yourself feel better.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 09:01 AM
0

If we're only including straight encounters then I don't see how they can be practicing it anything other than the same amount. If you're saying gay male encounters are more likely to involve practicing condom use than lesbian ones...well, duh.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:55 AM
7

Women don't want chlamydia from hot men either.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:52 AM

Many women aim to avoid the type of men who call women sluts or see it as the most that can be wrong with a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:50 AM

How can you be less qualified for a relationship? Lack of qualifications? Not enough prior experience?
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:48 AM

It depends on how he expresses his disappointment, but it's not entitled just to feel disappointed about it in itself.
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:47 AM
1

That's what I mean by it takes work. You can't form a strong emotional bond through self-indulgent complaining and getting annoyed when the other person wants you to listen to them complaining. You've got to listen even when you don't like it, you've got to know when what you want to say might be a bit much. Women are just as emotional as women, they are human after all, but they tend to acknowledge their emotions less. This actually results in them making more emotional decisions. I'm not sure …
/r/PurplePillDebate23/05/26 08:45 AM
2

Okay, what are men going to do about the world being unsafe that women can't? If the virtues outweighed the vices, men wouldn't do bad things as they'd all be stopped.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 09:40 PM
5

Not really. You could get the same angle the other way around and most people find that easier. You don't need much knee strength unless you're aiming for a 90° angle or near it, which is unlikely to feel good.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 06:54 PM
7

PIV isn't even the usual way women get off, and being on top won't necessarily make it feel any better.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 06:36 PM
6

It's more for male pleasure.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 06:25 PM
1

I don't know, ask them. Maybe they just can't be bothered.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:25 PM
9

All the "effort" you're talking about is PIV, and making it better for the man mostly. PIV is not the main way women orgasm. You were complaining about your part (insofar as you are doing it).
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:24 PM
1

Historically, they wanted their wives to have work they could do inside the home (traditional crafts were common) as there was too much that needed doing there and it was seen as women's work. Many more children and free school came in more recently than you'd think, and household chores took so much longer before modern technology.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:25 PM
1

The only reason they would be unsafe in the first place is men. If you're claiming the virtues of men who aren't you, you must also claim their vices. If there were only women, there would still be bad women, but men wouldn't be required to do a (lackluster, as when "defending" against bad men) defending job.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:05 PM
7

Men who complain about doing most of the work in sex by and large are complaining about thrusting during PIV being too much work for them. That is for them and feels good for them. It's never about fingering, oral, foreplay or anything that might actually make a woman's chances of orgasm go up (no, you thrusting harder and faster isn't likely to make it any better). Bearing in mind that blow jobs are a common expectation these days.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 04:01 PM
30

They can experience emotional intimacy with whoever they want (and usually their first experience of this is with family members). But they often aren't willing to. This is because emotional intimacy takes work on both sides and men often don't want to or don't realise they should do that work outside a romantic relationship. Many men pride themselves on their friendships just being about playing video games or football together and being able to fall out of contact with their friends for many w…
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 03:53 PM
1

Do you think it's generally advertised? I've known some abusers and they usually seem perfectly normal and lovely, and will keep this up until the abuse starts (and indeed will still keep the act in between). It's hard to know what to look for especially as nobody's really taught about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:52 AM
4

What's the point of this, to make women feel bad about themselves for something that on some level they can't control? What will that achieve?
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:49 AM
4

The kind that ignores the concept of consent, treats its actors like shit, and doesn't care about giving basic respect to women and minorities. I don't care about what specific flavour you're into.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:28 AM
6

Everyone is different in what they like sexually. There are lots of different vagina shapes so even physically speaking it can't all be the same. But senseless pounding doesn't do much for very many people. If you're going hard and fast you need to make sure you're angling it right as only some parts of the vagina are sensitive. Pounding is also associated with causing damage and pain, especially as many people are really resistant to using lube.
/r/PurplePillDebate22/05/26 05:20 AM
3

Hold on a second. Your post wasn't about "hyper-specific niche types". That's the first time you've brought it up and you haven't even explained what you mean by it. This is what they call a motte and bailey.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 03:03 PM
6

But you aren't attracted to all types of women. You only like some types. I know this is true simply because you're human.
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 02:58 PM
3

Everyone has some kind of type, including you. Not being introspective enough to recognise your type doesn't mean you don't have one - I truly doubt you're genuinely into a completely random and entirely diverse range of women with nothing in common whatsoever. Those "features and esthetics [sic]" you're into are part of your type. Like anyone else, I have a personality that's compatible with some kinds of personalities but clashes with others. Those that are compatible are my type. I'm also dra…
/r/PurplePillDebate21/05/26 02:53 PM
2

It seems like it's impossible not to discriminate when doing anything by your definition, rendering it useless.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 06:31 PM
2

What is discrimination to you?
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 05:02 PM
2

It's like saying you're discriminating against someone for not being their best friend - you can usually only have one at a time so might as well choose one to your taste.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:24 PM
2

So first we need to not conflate not personally dating someone with discriminating against them. And second, again, I don't know how it works. I didn't say it was about genitalia or only about one thing. I've asked straight and gay people and they've essentially just said "vibes".
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:03 PM
1

Looksmatch was a term coined by the pill communities to bully women, regardless of how they look, by saying their looksmatch is Shrek.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 04:00 PM
2

Is it really just about looks though? I don't think a straight man would date a femboy who looks just like a woman on the surface. (I'm bi and don't fully know how it works.)
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:56 PM
5

Bold of you to assume that men do accept that. In reality, both men and women could have casual sex with someone like that, but it's not the majority and they're often a last choice (if they're even perceived as a choice rather than invisible). Add to that the fact less women are into casual sex in the first place andmore men having conditions like autism and dyspraxia that result in these traits, and the chances don't look good for men like this wanting casual sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate20/05/26 03:38 PM
5

And yet they never do bloom into anything else...
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:42 PM

Why should they think that you mean? Because they have brains and can work out obvious facts.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:40 PM
0

You could just make a quick search or say we don't know instead of claiming they're untrue.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:20 PM

They understand that men who are their type are going to have traits associated with that. If their type is men who like fishing, they're going to expect them to like fishing but other men to perhaps not like it. Or if they prefer to date blonde men, they'll understand that other men aren't blonde.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:19 PM
7

The proportion of women in relationships with women is very low even in particularly accepting countries.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:15 PM
0

Maybe you should look...
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 06:12 PM
0

Are you going to tell me they show otherwise?
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 05:02 PM
1

Thanks for proving you know nothing about women at all. Studies have proven time and time again that women have lower self-esteem than men and are less argumentative, preferring to reach consensus even sometimes when they shouldn't. You can also see this just by opening your eyes. Women do actually tend to be more collectivist but towards any group, not just women, and see themselves as part of a collective humanity with men more frequently than men see themselves as part of a collective humanit…
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 04:40 PM
2

Women don't tend to like hooking up as much or feel safe doing so especially with the relative anonymity of app-based meeting, and they are regularly harassed on the apps with not much being done about it. You ask women who left the apps why and it's either men were exclusively looking for hookups or men were too rude to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate19/05/26 05:41 AM
5

The most common cross-culturally significant indicator of beauty is the face. Beards are seen as great in some areas and ugly in others, in many places it's common for well-groomed men to have them off. Large breasts and wide hips are seen as less than desirable in areas where a slender figure is prized.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 09:34 PM
3

Definitely B. Sex without intimacy is just a very uncomfortable thought to me, when I miss sex I can just masturbate. It seems very lonely to have a visitor you can't connect with and who just forgets you and nobody else. I'd much rather have a friend.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 09:29 PM
5

Money? How so? What do you mean by chivalry? Like politeness? Women expect all their dates to be polite.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:08 PM
1

Now, I somehow doubt you're talking about different men asking the same woman out. You're talking about different men asking different women out. (If there's anything in this that isn't totally made up from the red and black pill narrative.) Naturally, responses will vary.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:04 PM

Even if you don't believe non hot women exist and seriously believe any woman can find a boyfriend easily, getting sex or a relationship is not the only dating issue that can possibly exist. People in relationships can hurt each other quite badly, whether intentionally, through lack of skill, or through circumstances outside anyone's control. When women talk about having issues sorting through potential dates and they're lucky enough to have several, they are generally saying they have problems …
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 04:00 PM
1

No, I don't make posts in feminist subreddits trying to lead users into some kind of gotcha. (It's clear what you think the answers to these questions must be.) If I wanted to find answers that some people had said, I'd use the search bar, as I guarantee some gloating MRA has asked it before. It is quite telling how much you really really want feminist spaces, of all places, to be spaces for discussing men and their (perceived) problems. Not everything is about men.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 03:50 PM
3

Depends on the country, but in most, next of kin doesn't even come into it. Marriage means both of your things belong to both of you, so you don't inherit your spouse's things when they die, they're just yours as they were before the death. That means none of it is subject to tax or any legal processes. Other people can only inherit when you're both dead, although you can give some of it away as a gift before that if you want. It's almost certainly what you want when you remarry. If you just hav…
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 03:42 PM
5

What am I meant to reflect on? It's not like you've given me feedback. You've told me to mature and grow not because of anything I've done (you don't know me) but because I have a vagina and apparently all women have this fault you've decided they have. Not acting on nonexistent feedback from a random internet stranger isn't a character flaw. You quite literally made it personal. It's not "lashing out" to point out the flaws in your rhetoric. This is a debate subreddit.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 03:38 PM
8

Your assertion that women need to mature and grow is based on a false premise. Maybe I don't want to be what you consider to be matured and grown. If you're going to make such sweeping, misogynistic generalisations about women I'd imagine your ideal is not exactly something to aspire to.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 12:50 PM
4

What are they asking for from men but not women?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 06:38 AM

As far as I can see, nobody is talking either positively or negatively about any sexual assault element. Perhaps you'd be better off claiming that nobody recognises or wants to talk about it.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 06:06 AM

Could you tell us the name of the video or post the link so we can see the comments OP?
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 06:02 AM
5

Many millennials are married. The idea is to raise children as a committed unmarried couple, although in reality such couples are more likely to break up than married ones.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:58 AM
7

The most important benefits that are exclusive to marriage come after one partner dies. It's hard to inherit without marriage, including just staying in your house as you're not considered to own all of it usually if unmarried, and a large portion may be lost to tax. I don't get the point of dancing around marriage by trying to replicate the legal benefits with more expense. Just get married at that point.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:57 AM
3

What is it with this subreddit and trying to claim that two different things are equivalent between men and women when direct equivalents exist? Men can also post pictures of themselves on social media go to clubs and bars, and not dress modestly in public. That would be equivalent to women doing the same. Women can also talk to other men. That would be equivalent to men talking to other women. You're making a false equivalency for the sole purpose of calling people hypocrites.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:48 AM
8

I don't think you should "mature and grow" to appease someone who makes misogynist generalisations.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:41 AM
6

In any relationship, people have expectations and something to gain.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:39 AM
3

I'd think he's probably a lot of work of the kind few would be willing to put in.
/r/PurplePillDebate18/05/26 05:37 AM
1

In that case, a distraction is the best way to reduce risk of harm. If you try to physically fight them then you're likely to lose, especially if they're armed. You might be able to distract and escape unharmed.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 06:15 PM
5

It takes them hours to begin with when they're noobs. Btw to cook broccoli: Boil kettle with plenty of water Cut broccoli into chunks Turn hob to high heat, place on pan filled with broccoli and kettle water After it starts boiling, turn hob to medium heat Ten minutes later, take pan off the heating and drain broccoli through a collander or sieve
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 03:59 PM
8

She said she enjoyed cooking. Some women enjoy it and some women don't. Some men enjoy it and some men don't. We all should know how whether we enjoy it or not. Most women work and don't want to spend hours cooking after a day of work either. That sounds like a very complicated recipe though, should be much quicker normally.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 03:56 PM
4

Women who know how to cook know because they learned. It doesn't just come pre-installed in their brains. Men are just as capable of learning, and they're not going hunting anything any more so they have just as much time. Cooking as a pair is generally more efficient, and it helps both people to keep track of ingredients so there's more chance of someone getting refills when needed. And everyone will need to cook at some point, you don't want to just be eating ready meals when your wife is busy…
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 02:41 PM

They wouldn't seriously go for that. They'd maybe say it just to try to prove a point.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 12:16 PM

Of course, men don't notice how they affect the look of the whole face, but they still do. Men can insist whatever they like but women will try to fit what their actions suggest. Oversized clothes look much more flattering than tight-fitting on many shapes especially as so many people are overweight now, lumps and bumps get hidden rather than exaggerated. Women aren't generally saying that at all. These studies have been done recently too.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 11:20 AM

They're not making you sick or anything like a period though. PTSD from any source can be cured. That doesn't make it not real or not bad or whatever.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 10:49 AM

I didn't say circumcision was simple, I said it didn't cause recurring sickness. There are a lot of differences between circumcision and periods that makes them weird to compare. I didn't say that anyone was more important than anyone else. I said that you can have the same mental health issue from different sources. Your PTSD doesn't just go away because you didn't have it bad enough or something. It seems like you're uninterested in reading what I actually wrote though.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 09:05 AM

They weren't told anything. If you listen to detransitioners, they say they hated being female, but when they transitioned, being male felt wrong as they didn't have dysphoria. In particular they bring up wanting to get rid of parts that are commonly sexualised; wanting to escape sexual assault, sexual harassment, and rape; and wanting to date women without judgement. They tend to get those things through transition but at the cost of their bodies feeling foreign to them.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 09:01 AM

They're separate things. Someone who sexually harasses you isn't going to be your soulmate. Sexual harassment is done over power, not desire. Although many women would still rather be left alone completely by men if it meant no sexual harassment and assault.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 08:58 AM

Those statistics don't contradict. Obviously, if you're in suicide counselling you haven't died from suicide. Your statistics were on those who died from suicide.
/r/PurplePillDebate17/05/26 12:00 AM

Does circumcision make you faint or experience any kind of sickness at all monthly, or even yearly? Really not comparable. You don't need to be in danger of death to get PTSD. Many different kinds of experiences can be traumatic and there is usually no help offered for childbirth trauma.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:58 PM

When women say they want to be a man, they often say they'd really quite like to not be so visible, particularly in terms of being constantly evaluated about their attractiveness.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:55 PM

That's changing in the younger generation as being trans is more accepted. More FTMs detransitioning suggests that actually, girls and women are wanting to escape being female at all costs, even when they don't have gender dysphoria, which means they go back later.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:52 PM
3

This is the difference between being a temporary relationship (sounds like a business relationship the way you put it) and a life partner. If you want to commit to someone as a member of your family, they actually do have to become important enough in your life that your major decisions will be about their happiness too. You do need to keep thinking of them and putting them first. You need to centre each other. There are certain duties you will have towards them, and if you don't want that or ar…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:44 PM

All of those things are exaggerated versions of things men do like, you're just criticising them when they've overdone it. Defined, framing eyebrows, full lips, and sun-kissed complexions are beloved and consistently chosen by men, and sometimes women go a little wrong in trying to meet these standards. Women who call all their friends beautiful aren't making a statement about how their friends look. There have been studies done that show men overrate themselves in most metrics, and it's easy en…
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:38 PM

A lot of men here will take any opportunity they can get to tear down a woman's looks, and often have vendettas about specific women they really want to call ugly.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:34 PM

You're assuming they feel entitled enough to actually be shocked they don't get it. I've never come across a woman with the level of confidence to even think she couldn't be rejected. Fear of rejection is the main reason for women not asking out men as often. They know it's a big possibility and worry about it. Your description of their reaction sounds like a fear come true.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 11:32 PM

Providing a prime example here of what I said about men on this subreddit taking any opportunity to call a woman unattractive, often underrating.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:30 PM

Maybe she's not your type but I think she's pretty. I'd date her.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 06:06 PM

They were sad and disappointed and trying to get out of an awkward situation! You really seem to read the worst into people. I never said anything about how often men get rejected. We weren't talking about that.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:44 PM

I never said that leagues were about just one trait (presumably you mean looks).
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:42 PM

I did a quick search, I think they're both rather pretty and look equally matched.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:41 PM

And they may not find her attractive, even if they're well within her league.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:25 PM

It's not equal usually. But men on this subreddit underrate women usually (and it's been shown time and time again that men in general overrate themselves). They're often delusional about what they can get it seems.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:22 PM

I think you're confusing shock with disappointment. Women are very afraid of rejection from men generally. They're painfully aware of the possibility.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:18 PM

And men who ask women out generally go for women out of their league, but we still discuss those approaches.
/r/PurplePillDebate16/05/26 05:16 PM
2

I have had sex with him, that's more than I've done with anyone else. That wasn't intentional but that's what happened. But I never have wanted to date and have sex with someone I didn't seriously think I would marry. Hence I would've done the same things in any relationship. What I do or don't like depends on what I like, not the person I'm with (at least, not any further than them also liking it). If I try something new it's not "special treatment", I just think we might like it.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 04:26 PM
1

No. I'm still not comfortable with that. My husband is a man and can orgasm easily and he's the same way, just not comfortable with casual sex. If I want an orgasm, it's quicker, easier, safer and less uncomfortable to just give myself one. That's what I did when I felt horny when single.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 01:44 PM
5

A match is not a date or option. Your matches often do not want to date you. You're making it even more obvious with your comment, as obviously men don't want to date an empty space.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 05:20 AM
3

It's crazy that there are men out there who genuinely don't believe in non hot women.
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 05:18 AM
4

Some women don't. Nobody expressed interest in them, wanted or not. It's like non hot women just don't exist to some men, they can't even conceive of them
/r/PurplePillDebate15/05/26 05:17 AM
9

Do you genuinely not get that most women don't have a "sea of suitors" and many have none at all? When I say no options it means nobody has romantic interest in someone that they're aware of. Otherwise it's just bad options.
/r/PurplePillDebate14/05/26 09:39 PM

Scenario 2 just isn't something that's likely to happen. If you like a sex act you like it, it's not like someone very kinky suddenly only likes vanilla missionary if they have a boring partner. If someone did something in the past and doesn't want to now, most likely they tried it and just didn't like it, which of course doesn't mean they're obliged to do it again.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 09:23 PM
5

That's why I didn't make a top-level comment... I was explaining something to this user. I didn't even answer your question, you don't know whether my parents are married!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 08:02 PM
2

It certainly is more socially conservative (bearing in mind I'm mostly comparing it to England as that's where I live), although the main political divide isn't about that. Gay marriage and abortion were only legalised by Westminster to try to blackmail the devolved assembly into sitting, and tolerance is pretty low on most fronts. It's a bit more economically left and society is more inclusive of different social classes though. There are a lot more religious people but being called Protestant …
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 07:42 PM
2

Weirdly the question did still make sense the other way!
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 07:28 PM
2

I don't remember, I was probably still in nappies when that happened. There were civil partnerships at some point. I'm bisexual, and I felt kind of uneasy about marrying a man when I couldn't if my love happened to be a woman.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 07:24 PM
2

For many people here, gay marriage was illegal in their location growing up or still is. I'm from Northern Ireland, where gay marriage was illegal until 2020 when I was an adult and had already left, and I never really could picture myself with a wife growing up as it wasn't even possible at the time.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 07:17 PM

It's not about shared values. A computer doesn't value anything. With a human soul and values comes the ability to choose and to say no. A computer is not like you, it can't think of feel or say no, just say what you want to hear.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 03:11 PM
3

I'm sure you think that based on social media. I noticed you're not answering any questions. Just saying "no, you're wrong because I feel you're wrong".
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 06:30 AM
2

"If anyone fails they just weren't trying hard enough." There's no counterfactual to this. The people who fail hardest at these certainly do seem to be trying their absolute best. By fail I mean it's not their job as they're not making any money from it, try as they might. So what's your job again? How many people do you know exactly who are successful in these fields? Any statistics in support of what you believe?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 06:17 AM
3

There is no statistic to support your claims. It's just an express route to sadness and unemployment. How many people do you know in real life who work in cryptocurrency, e-commerce or influencing? What's your job?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 06:05 AM
1

Most people do want children. But they're having less than replacement rate as there are more people who want/have one or none than want/have three or more. You're not easily going to change the mind of people with no children who don't want any, but a lot of people with one or more children might want another if it was made easier and cheaper for them to do so - cheap and accessible childcare with discounts for siblings would be a step towards that.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:47 AM
2

Those who gamble and go all in with these "career paths" end up sad, broke and very much unemployed. You're guessing a lot about these people's lives, you know social media isn't reality right?
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:44 AM
2

Otherwise known as sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:42 AM
1

I'm showing how ridiculous the OP's logic is. I don't actually believe it.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:42 AM

I'm not sure, we'd need to see what happened.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:41 AM

Sounds like you find it optimal to date a mirror rather than a person.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:40 AM
2

Educating them, or in the moment, distracting them.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:38 AM
1

I don't see them. That's why I asked for a link. I'm wondering who is likely to see these comments.
/r/PurplePillDebate13/05/26 05:36 AM
1

That was quite a pivot. Unless you think I'll just call up the army real quick.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 09:40 PM
2

Most young men aren't doing an essential job that runs society anyway - their female peers are more likely to do roles like that in the public sector, although the majority of jobs in general are just in offices or retail or whatever doing things that society would be just fine without. Anyway, young people can't afford to be picky about jobs in many places at the moment, if they don't take what they can get they just end up unemployed. If you try to work in cryptocurrency, e-commerce or influen…
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 09:37 PM
1

So that is still creating and increasing violence. No way did you say the military stopped violence. 😂
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 09:28 PM
4

So you haven't done so. Maybe you should refer back to my original point as it seems you forgot.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 09:27 PM
3

I've never done this personally, this is very rare. I'm guessing this woman is close with him in some way.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 08:00 PM
2

There are other ways.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 07:32 PM
5

But by this person's logic, if you aren't personally stopping it you're part of the problem. The purpose of the military is literally violence. And people rape and murder women while both the police and military exist.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 06:45 PM
12

Are you doing it? If not, then why do you hate women?! (And unfortunately they're not stopping it. Just cleaning up afterwards. In the case of the military, often doing it, just to women who "don't count".)
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 06:41 PM
10

I assume that if these things were so commonplace it would be easy for you to provide some links? Anyway, I can't do anything about someone else's actions or words. Why do some men claim they don't hate women but do nothing to stop men killing and raping women?
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 05:57 PM

Do we really want to make this a competition, because with the weird porn types that men are into we know who's going to win. It's just a case of porn doing weird things to the brain. Above all it's addictive, even if you don't actually like the content, and even straight women are often drawn to lesbian porn as the women tend to look a bit more like they might be enjoying it.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 04:11 PM
3

We know they have sex. If you're not a lesbian or bi woman they're not having sex with you and I don't know why you think they'd be sharing that private information about. It's actually common for lesbian couples to have sex for hours at a time. They also orgasm significantly more than other women.
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 05:50 AM
1

There's no reason to respect it at all if you get something (and something bad apparently) by accident! Even if it's rare, you didn't do anything to get it so what's to be respected? If sex is so bad, then maybe you could respect them abstaining for it, but being offered it accidentally and then accepting even though it's bad? (And something being difficult would imply those who do it don't just stumble into it!)
/r/PurplePillDebate12/05/26 05:48 AM
1

No, I know someone's incompatible straight up if they want casual sex. So it'd be less of a waste to both of our time if they just said they want casual sex and maybe something else later. I'd go on dates with them, but nothing physical and no commitments like moving in until they make their mind up.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 08:19 PM
1

I'd be much happier to know we weren't compatible straight up than think he wanted something serious and then have him leave. The latter is way more offensive, obviously. I don't expect to be special to anyone, but I do expect honesty.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 07:21 PM
1

I mean that, if men are genuinely that dumb, then maybe they shouldn't be trusted with other things, like voting or making other decisions for themselves...
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 06:42 PM
1

Then it implies we shouldn't trust men with things as they're apparently so indecisive and unaware of even their own thoughts.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 05:44 PM
1

Sounds like you think men aren't very smart or self-aware. I think we owe fellow human beings the truth.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 05:42 PM
1

These are hypothetical men. They don't have options.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 05:40 PM
3

I'm saying doing it after trying really hard is worse than doing it after not really trying.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:52 PM
4

A lot of people really don't grasp the concept of necessary and sufficient conditions. Not to get all "they should teach this in school", but this feels like fundamental knowledge. A necessary condition is something needed for an event to happen e.g. presence of sperm is a necessary condition for conception of a child. But it is not sufficient. A sufficient condition is something that will make an event happen with nothing else present e.g. falling from a great height is a sufficient condition f…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:47 PM
2

If I know a man well and am into him on a personal level, I find his body very beautiful. There are certain parts of the male anatomy I particularly like to look at. I have sex when I feel horny at a particular time and my husband is available. I'm not really sure why else I'd have sex.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:39 PM
0

Women are expected to be certain about the kind of relationship they want before getting into it. I think that's reasonable and prevents a lot of trouble, and I don't think it's beyond men to do. The other option is he can just say he's not sure rather than lying about being sure. Surely you think men are self-aware enough to know whether or not they're confused.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:33 PM
0

It's better for you to be just single than single, but addicted to an imaginary girlfriend/boyfriend in your computer.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:30 PM

Do you really think men can't think for themselves? He prefers it and doesn't see it as grovelling. I know exactly the burden of it because I do it so quit the bullshit. Just don't ask out and go on dates with everyone under the sun and you'll be fine. It's a teeny tiny expectation compared to doing the entirety of a house's domestic labour for the rest of your days. Which also causes anxiety, and money if you consider the opportunity cost.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 02:28 PM
1

But nobody's making any demands here. He's just saying he likes to pay. And I'm pointing out the comparative really small effort on the man's side. After asking someone on a date, planning for it, and paying for it, they owe you lifetime domestic labour?
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 07:27 AM
1

No, that isn't good for anyone psychologically. A computer isn't anyone's friend, family member, or lover. It can't be indistinguishable from a human in the ways that are important - it can't disagree, it can't leave, and it doesn't have a mind of its own.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 06:46 AM
1

I'll be right back, just got to tell my husband he has to do all the housework forever as I paid on our first date. Bought a lifetime housekeeper for the price of some fish and chips.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 06:41 AM
6

If sex with multiple different people is bad, then trying really really hard to do this bad thing must be worse.
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 06:37 AM
4

If you didn't dismiss feminism out of hand as "unpleasant" people "screeching" (because of course, women must be soft-spoken and only gently and incredibly politely advocate for their rights) you might've realised it's an equal rights movement and I really shouldn't have to tell you why it's good to support the rights of others even when it doesn't directly benefit you. But how dare women "nag" and "demand" to be treated as well as men. If you actually listened, you might realised that there are…
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 06:19 AM
4

What would make them feel more secure if their partner being physically incapable of doing the thing they're apparently so afraid of doesn't do anything for them? Are you saying men are irrational? I think both men and women care a lot more about sexual cheating than "emotional cheating".
/r/PurplePillDebate11/05/26 05:18 AM
10

By your logic, men should feel the most secure with women who have been sterilised or otherwise aren't having children. ...Oh, it's not that? Just a fear of cheating? Yeah, women have that too. The equivalent to a woman being abandoned to raise her children alone is a man being abandoned to raise his children alone. It's less common but it does happen.
/r/PurplePillDebate10/05/26 09:44 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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