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mercybull Archive

View 8 posts and 44 comments by mercybull on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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2

Bro, I am sorry you are living this right now! She made up her mind that you were no longer someone that mattered to her. You need to know that she has that capacity. It hurts like hell but your efforts would be better off placing your energy into a new relationship being aware of the patterns that lead to the end of your current relationship as to not repeat them. Find your person, one that lines up with you! Keep your head up and move on to someone that supports your peace.
/r/Divorce_Men23/03/25 03:51 PM
10

Same brother, in order to keep my business I had to assume all the debt that we incurred including joint back taxes that keep growing because interest is higher than the monthly payments I can afford. Child support, insurance, half of all the extra curricular things. It's all good because it's for my child but I am constantly walking the line of bankruptcy. The good news is, I found a woman that not only loves me but likes me and slowly but surely with her support and great financial habits I ca…
/r/Divorce_Men08/03/25 03:21 PM
2

I had the same issue come up! Who has possession of the passport? I suggest you get it and put it in a safe spot she can't get to. She can fight you for it in court or mediation and you can then agree to some sort of arrangement. Like you will not allow your child to travel to a country that does not have extradition agreements with the US. Ps. It also sounds like you need to start moving money out of any shared accounts and freeze Credit Cards. Sorry man, you will come out on the other side of …
/r/Divorce_Men17/12/22 03:21 AM
8

The gaslighting and ghosting when they have made up their minds to end it, is truly cruel.
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 04:46 AM
2

This sent chills up my spine! My ex had cameras on her side of the house and I had them on mine. I felt like I was living in some weird twilight zone!
/r/Divorce_Men05/12/22 04:44 AM
8

Bro, give yourself some grace. Do what you can to accept the situation without diving into guilt, shame, self doubt. You are in the thick of it right now. You will have some shit days, followed by some slightly less shittier days. Then one day you will start having good days and start feeling like yourself again. This time you will have gained the wisdom to avoid the patterns and complexities that got you here. The sooner you come to the realization that there is no bad person or good person in …
/r/Divorce_Men20/11/22 04:41 AM
1

Yeah, I have to use "Our Family Wizard" to communicate with my ex. It's fine if there are scheduling and other big issues to discuss but a pain In the ass to let her know I am outside to pick up my daughter. The notification don't always work and it's an easy way for her to keep me waiting. She won't dare ask for me to communicate to my daughter that way when she is with her because it would be reciprocated fully. At this point it really is just another way for her to feel in control, so whateve…
/r/Divorce_Men02/08/22 03:04 AM
2

So I got a super expensive lawyer from a top firm and got my ass handed to me. His reality and mine were different. The way he looked at finances and time were the way wealthy people look at it. I am self employed and definitely not wealthy! I am much less wealthy after the divorce and have less time to generate more income. I would also recommend a female attorney, they seem to play the game better. A rich male attorney, is like "f it" just pay it and move on. Also make sure they didn't just ha…
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/22 03:43 AM
4

Don't let the hate close you off from being happy. Once, I said fuck it and let it go, a new amazing woman showed up in my life. Just heard today from a mutual friend of me and my ex's that she is so unhappy about me being with this new woman. She's the one that filed. Not going to lie, it felt good so maybe all the hate isn't gone. Lol! It gets better bro.
/r/Divorce_Men04/06/22 07:21 PM
1

Hang in there brother! Not being able to see your kids everyday is absolutely the worst part of the equation. It hurts like a mother fucker! You just have to make the commitment, no matter what that you will be the best father you can be. The more you honor that, the more the pain seems to transform into a strange kind of hope. A hope that your child will recognize your efforts and know they were loved by you. I am less than a year out and I'll get hit with waves of sadness but it becomes more m…
/r/Divorce_Men22/09/21 01:44 AM
1

If you can't laugh about it in the end, it will just turn you into a bitter, closed off prick.
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 02:40 PM
2

My ex makes almost as much as I do and I still have to pay 1800 a month for our daughter because she argued for extended standard possession. Which basically means , she has our daughter for 51 percent of the time. Her lawyer was better than mine. Lol
/r/Divorce_Men18/09/21 02:12 AM
6

Stay calm, don't react, gather all the necessary documents and have them ready. Your happiness is not dependent on whether she is happy or not. Start saving cash, and looking over shared accounts.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/21 10:38 PM
9

I have to pay 1800 a month in child support and she makes as much as I do!! So yeah, you are definitely leaving money on the table that could help the quality of life your children have when they are with you. I only have one child.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/21 10:36 PM
1

It becomes a lot easier, at one point you start hoping that they would hurry up and find someone else.
/r/Divorce_Men24/08/21 03:21 PM
4

Honestly, there were so many I couldn't think straight. We had come up with an agreed upon 50/50 custodial schedule that was in the best interest of our daughter. The first thing they asked for was for me to get standard possession and full child support! I was so pissed. I spend time with my daughter everyday and now she was trying to take that away. She went after a much bigger piece of my business. She put a paramour clause in. She ran up a 30,000 in her name but claimed she had purchased com…
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/21 04:23 AM
4

Good luck to you brother. I just know that I let Anger get to me in mediation and I couldn't really concentrate the way I needed to. Stay calm and focused and expect a lot of curve balls.
/r/Divorce_Men22/08/21 12:21 AM
1

I had sticker shock after several of the invoices but unfortunately the amicable part of the divorce faded quickly! It's unfortunate because we could have put that money away for our daughter or at least a big chunk of it. So harmful and wasteful.
/r/Divorce_Men23/07/21 01:34 AM
1

It's expensive!!!! Af!!! My amicable divorce turned into a 70k ordeal and I took most of the community debt to just get the shit over with. There are things you can do, to streamline your cost. Things, I wish I would have done ahead of time, so my incompetent lawyer wouldn't have charged me for so many hours doing shit his even more incompetent paralegal couldn't do.
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/21 07:30 AM
1

I basically told my attorney he did a shit job! After financial disclosures, he knew exactly how much I had and how much I made, asshole got everything he could before I told him, I was talking to other attorneys to look over the invoices
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/21 03:05 AM
2

Oh my good buddy from New York came in town! Didn't know he was here until my daughter told me, that she and her mommy went and hung out with him all day!!! Now, I don't give a shit what my ex does, but he fucked up!!!
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/21 03:02 AM
2

If you do borrow money, or take out a loan to start a business,make sure to not park it in a vehicle that could be considered community property. I borrowed 125,000 from family and friends for my business, 1/3 partner INC. I waited to pull all the funds together to buy my shares outright. All monies were loaned and notarized and payments schedules established. All responsibilities fell on me! I had them wire money into a checking account that I was on only. Still went after it as community prope…
/r/Divorce_Men22/07/21 03:00 AM
2

My brother, I feel you. When I got the invoice for just the day of mediation, I almost shit my pants!! 13,000.00 total! I wrote an email to my attorney saying the cost was grossly disproportionate to the estate and we would have to discuss it in person. He emailed back and said as a courtesy they would remove 3,000.00! Fml
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 08:56 PM
2

The part that made me want to flip the table over, was a custodial issue. We had come up with our own 50/50 schedule that kept our child's life almost as normal as possible. Then she realized she wanted every Sunday to be mine. I thought that was laughable, but then came the argument for standard possession and max child support. I said, No "fng" way. We can go to trial. When the mediator and eunuch lawyer saw I was going to throw the entire mediation in the garbage. That's when, a court is goin…
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 05:52 AM
3

I was initially trying to hire a female, she was too busy so referred me to her right hand man! He was just so damn passive!!
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 12:32 AM
2

I signed! It sucked. Thanks though.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 12:31 AM
3

Man, unfortunately it's hard for me to disagree with how you see it.
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/21 10:00 PM
5

It was mediation and at the end of the day I was just so beat down, and kept hearing well it's just going to cost more to go to trial and you won't get it anyway, that I just said screw it and signed. Unfortunately for me, sounds like my ex is dating the new chief of police. So this should be fun!
/r/Divorce_Men20/07/21 09:54 PM
6

You got this! I actually can't wait until all this bs and cost is over!!
/r/Divorce_Men17/06/21 04:06 PM
8

So for random hook ups, Tinder has been pretty good but it's a numbers game and can sometimes feel like a full time job! Lol. Bumble has also been good but usually the women are less interested in sex right away. I haven't had much success on hinge, not sure why.
/r/Divorce_Men14/06/21 08:40 PM
6

Because we have been lying to ourselves for the majority of them. We have buried our hopes and dreams under the functionality of our work/life balance and the truth is we are no longer the people we once were and need to move on.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/21 07:51 PM
2

Bro, I feel you! Mine just stop talking to me for months before she filed. She knew that the silent treatment was as cruel a tact as anything. I would then get angry because of the lack of communication and she would say, my anger is the reason she wouldn't talk to me. There was no way out, and if she did allow a conversation to happen it was all about the shit I was or wasn't doing to cater to her emotional needs. I would write her letters as the therapist suggested, she would wait days to resp…
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/21 02:52 AM
1

Man, I am already 15k in and we just got our 50/50 temporary custodial agreement drafted. We also have our financial disclosures ready to go. I'm thinking it's going to cost me at least another 5k just to divide the debt. That's all we have, debt!!! Lol! And I have to pay 20 grand to get 50 percent of it, but actually that's not a bad price because it would have been mine to deal with 100 percent if we stayed married.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/21 02:20 AM
2

If you are responding to my experience with limerence, that was an unfortunate and involuntary release of chemicals into my brain as my marriage was headed off a cliff. It was always in my head and never encroached a physical reality.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/21 01:06 AM
1

I did not have an AE with my employee, that was a completely fabricated story on her behalf.
/r/Divorce_Men10/03/21 01:03 AM
1

Thanks. We are in Texas and sharing 50/50 custody. We have temporary orders and place. My attorney was pretty clear on the matter. I wouldn’t move out until orders were agreed upon and signed.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/21 01:59 PM
1

My attorney said only way I could move out is if we had temporary orders agreed upon. We do and she also gave the ok for spending community monies for the rental property I am going to. She just wanted me out.
/r/Divorce_Men12/02/21 09:19 AM
2

Well, I have never been violent in any capacity throughout my entire marriage! I have been an ass but never violent. It was a real sucker punch when I started hearing my wife say that she is physically scared of me. I have never intimated anything physical. When that started, I knew we were done. Just hurtful and bizarre.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/21 09:45 PM
2

I had to view it as a death. A death of my ideals and expectations of what I thought family was supposed to be. I also took into account how the climate at home was starting to affect my child negatively. In all honesty, I was praying for a miracle up until I came home that day. The only thing that came was the opportunity to step up as a man and a father and reinforce the amount of love I have for my daughter. If you have been miserable for this long, your son will grow thinking that it’s norma…
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/21 07:37 PM
1

I was actually told by my therapist and attorney they can subpoena those records. Judges hate to do it, but they will if it’s relevant to the case. It’s really a screwed up deal, you go to shrink searching for answers of certain behavioral issues to work on yourself, they find things you were never aware of and now that can be used against you.
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/21 07:31 PM
2

We just let my 7 year old daughter know that we are divorcing. It was honestly the most searing pain, I have ever experienced. After her 10 minute expression of absolute grief, we were able to frame it in a way that she was able to accept. She is actually excited about having a new house with stairs and a bigger room. Sbxw and I are doing 50/50 and we will put her well being above anything else but we explained to her that mommy and daddy are trying to learn how to be friends again and that she …
/r/Divorce_Men08/02/21 07:26 PM
4

My daughter is 7 and has been in play therapy for several months due to covid and the drastic change in climate at home. The play therapist knows about the upcoming divorce and had us read “helping your child with divorce the sandcastle way!” It’s been heartbreaking and insightful. My wife and I have been in couples and individual therapy for about a year now. We tried and we just can’t.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/21 01:24 AM
9

Thank you. The one thing I can say about my wife, she is a great mom and I am great Dad. We are agreeing to 50/50 and will be able to coparent well. I’m just sorry after 15 years we didn’t have enough in the tank to pull it through.
/r/Divorce_Men03/02/21 01:21 AM
4

Bro, just going through this! 17 years of marriage most of what I thought were pretty good and then I’m the most selfish, manipulative, untrustworthy person she ever met. It really broke me at first, now I can’t wait to skip on out of there. Stay strong.
/r/Divorce_Men25/01/21 06:05 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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