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myoklife Archive

View 8 posts and 512 comments by myoklife on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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14

Ok I agree but this is a really popular sentiment on FDS and the only novel thing here is the unnecessary and frankly, false suggestion that "rectangular women" and flat chests are undesirable. You can make this point without also saying that. My rectangular body has never been an issue.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/07/21 11:21 AM
66

Honestly we act here like men stringing women along never gets to marriage but it totally does. Men marry women they don't like all the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/07/21 10:48 PM
4

The apple on the cover was the least subtle thing I have ever seen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:48 AM
203

No one asks me this cause frankly I look like I'm 15 but if they did I would just stare at them and start fake sobbing really uncontrollably and shaking and then screaming WHY GOD? WHY DID YOU TAKE MY BABY or something to that extent cause I'm messy like that and people who ask this shit need to know how triggering it is for people who lost a child or cannot have children. I fit into neither of those categories myself but I have the bare minimum level of empathy to understand why you don't ask s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/07/21 11:43 AM
13

I went through the entire cycle of DABDA twice reading this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/07/21 10:36 AM
79

I didn't even catch the "when I approach" but whomp there it is. Yeah I personally don't like being approached by men in public and I would put a guard up. Not even because I'm afraid of sexual assault but because for some reason I attract mentally ill men who want to tell me long stories. I just want to get my groceries and leave, you know, I don't want to talk to anyone PERIOD. I saw a thread on askmen the other day that was like "where is the best place to pick up women?" which...for starters…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:55 PM
68

One thing dudes do to me sometimes is basically the equivalent of tailgating me on foot. It's just annoying more than anything to hear a heavy dude huffing and puffing so close behind me. Pass me already. I hate being that close to anyone. Someone did this to me yesterday. They were a loud presence. Jingly keys, big heavy steps, whistling. They walked way too close to me for about a block before I got home. I don't think it was intentionally creepy or nefarious but the lack of self awareness was…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:50 PM
231

Pickmes in the comments are literally thanking him for making this post. It's so sad that this is the most "allyship" some people have ever seen. There are just that few actual male allies.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:39 PM
403

He talks about women like helpless little babies or animals. Pity is not the emotion we need. It doesn't help. We need anger and motivation to change society. I can't help but wonder how much of his own behavior contributes to how women react to his presence in public. I don't freak out when a tall man jogs next to me but if he gets unnecessarily close to me I might. He seems to only be engaging with other men in the comments. Why do men think talking amongst themselves about a problem they caus…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/07/21 02:27 PM
3

Jesus Fucking Christ
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 11:53 PM
6

Red flag. Don't link your Instagram to OLD.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 11:47 PM
76

Yeah. Same. This was always the case but now it's just so blaringly obvious. Tell me ladies. How many women do you know who are so compulsively addicted to video games that they can't stop gaming during work? My work has fired two men for gaming all day at work. Same level of completely undeveloped human as adults who watch porn and jerk off on public transit, honestly. How fucked up do you have to be to think either of these things is okay. Fired person #2 particularly fucked their life up. The…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/07/21 11:40 PM
67

I posted this on the gaming sub and will say it to anyone who mentions this stupid fucking industry Serial rapist/molester from my hometown with incidents dating back to when he was 13 (I heard this from multiple MOTHERS of girls in my town) works for this fucking company. I didn't know it was the same one but it is. His social media is all about his role in making the new COD. Every time I hear about the horrors of this industry or a resurge of the me-too moment I legit google his name and "me …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 08:21 PM
20

Yep. I have a Google phone and if you block a number, the texts just go to a spam folder. So you can still see them if you go to the folder. I learned this recently and discovered my ex of over a year ago just can't fucking let go. He has also contacted me via email and linkedin. The only thing you can do is never, ever, ever respond. This is a CLASSIC narcissist thing. Devalue, discard people like toys, pick them up again when you're bored with whatever new toy you replaced them with. They are …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 06:45 PM
10

The problem isn't me walking around blasting my flamethrower recklessly. It's that people just need to adjust their expectations of me and just accept and anticipate that I may be anywhere with my flamethrower at any time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 04:55 PM
72

Do people willingly watch this guy? What a fucking loser
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 12:26 PM
81

Why is this not bigger news?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/07/21 11:19 AM
1

cries in crippling PMDD it's not an excuse but damn it has taken me more than half my life to finally manage the monumental toll the ten days before my period take on me every damn month and I fucking DID IT (well, am doing it but I'm almost there)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 11:35 PM
50

I dated a dude who would purposely "ruin the mood" by making stupid jokes, voices, or singing songs...yes, much like a young child who simply cannot focus on the task at hand who wanders off singing I'm A Little Teapot and chewing on their sleeve. It was always a turn-off. Not to mention his severely broken penis and PIED. But he really had the audacity to accuse me of being asexual at the end of it all. Anyway, you'd think he would have figured out the cause of my disgust after the many times s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 05:08 PM
78

The ways some men will do anything, including major self-harm, to avoid having to do a goddamn thing. How does he even have a job? Nepotism? I see less-extreme versions of this everywhere, though. A lot of my colleagues do those "meal subscription" packages or eat exclusively premade foods from commercial diet plans (nutrasystem, huel, etc). The less-frugal folks just do takeout and vending machine snacks for every meal. I work at a university where all the campus food places close for the summe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/07/21 12:16 PM
2

Inventing it NOW. calling it sobr Seriously that would be the best thing ever! I bet it exists somewhere in some form. I really do just need to try harder to find sober people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:33 PM
2

That's how it is for me too. And I used to be one of them. I never totally got the "functional" part down. I started volunteering again since covid restrictions are up, as a way to make new friends (among other things) and this dude I have been working with drinks wine through the whole thing. This is from like 10-12 on Sundays. He can barely hold his head up at the end. The women who volunteer are always complaining about a hangover - better than being actually drunk but it doesn't make me want…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 09:17 PM
64

Yeah I saw that one that was like "stop enabling loser men and know your worth" and did a bit of a double take when I saw it wasn't FDS. It wasn't as well-received as it should have been but it still got like 20k upvotes. The more people hear this stuff the more normal it will sound so I hope people keep shouting it from rooftops
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 07:17 PM
6

This is my situation but add in quitting alcohol over the pandemic. I have yet to meet a person who is not a supporter of the LVM-pickme dynamic, a regular drinker, or engaged/married. Those are in order of least to most tolerable. I don't mind hanging out with people who drink or are in a serious relationship but I feel like I can't really bond with these people. It gets really tiring to third-wheel or to be around people who get drunk and act like babies. And that's all people seem to want to …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 07:14 PM
87

I see FDS principles in the wild regularly now. Like, in the last few months. I wonder what changed. None of the advice here is new. I wonder if it has to do with how before now, it has never been more obvious that men ain't shit. If the pandemic taught us anything
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 06:40 PM
8

Seriously. We are all going to be paying for their healthcare when their bodies start failing due to a lifetime of self-neglect
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 04:51 PM
8

Yeah sadly I think that a lot of these individuals will actually succeed to some extent because their enabling parents will give them everything when they die But at that point...who will take care of them? I wonder what we will call these people in 20-30 years and how their net sink of resources will affect society. I am so worried that women will be saddled with caring for their parents and deadbeat brothers who went their whole lives without learning how to do a damn thing
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 04:49 PM
11

Fucking embarrassing for both parties lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 11:31 AM
27

Honestly i feel like the dudes I describe here and are a lost cause. By deciding to leave the adult world in favor of being a child again (which I think is really what's happening here) they are giving up any chance at a romantic relationship. FDS is here to make sure no woman wastes her time with a dude who thinks the most bare minimum existence is too hard.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/07/21 10:36 AM
49

Pushover "boy moms" who treat their male and female children very differently. Usually combined with the dynamic you describe.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 10:46 PM
214

Ok, ok, ok you read my mind cause I have been thinking about this all day. I actually considered posting about it. It's happening to men around me left and right lately. It has been happening for awhile but lately it's like men are just giving up on life. Men in their mid-late thirties even. Every so often, some dude I used to know drops out of society. I know multiple acquaintances who had a good job and situation, but gave it up to move back to their parents house. I have a long-time coworker …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 10:33 PM
12

Yeah the concept of "leagues" is just another form of the 1-10 ranking system and it all comes from white male supremacy. I have used the term on here and I feel icky when I do. I prefer "levels" because it means whatever I want it to mean and it doesn't imply that i'm competing with or being ranked among others. It's just me playing my own life video game and going to the next level
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 10:20 PM
23

Yeah...I don't think I've ever seen a relationship where the man was actually "leagues above" the woman. It's always the reverse. And even in relationships where I've been (in hindsight) of a higher "league" than the dude, I was always somehow made to feel like I was worse than him. Either by him, his family, or shitty jealous friends. I saw that post and didn't read cause I was like oh, well that's not a problem I've ever had or see myself having. Now it seems to be deleted.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/07/21 10:11 PM
44

What people don't realize is...the "vanilla" ice cream used as a backdrop for cookie dough, peanut butter cups, caramel swirls...is a lower quality vanilla than plain vanilla ice cream. and there are multiple tiers of plain vanilla ice cream. "Homestyle" vanilla is trash. French vanilla or vanilla bean? UNF. Add a drizzle of real maple syrup and float into heaven.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 02:30 PM
19

Yeah I was gonna say, compare their reactions to these women to the reactions to similarly problematic men. If it is inexplicably more passionate and hateful to the former...you've got yourself a red flag. Best example is Hilary Clinton vs her husband. Bonus if her husband's former intern's name is mentioned.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/07/21 02:08 PM
45

Sadly even then I wouldn't be surprised if they had the same reaction. I went to a predominantly white high school in a pretty "liberal" (covertly racist rather than overtly) place in the US and I've been in this situation both with sexist and racist jokes. It was some time ago, but not that long ago
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:51 PM
64

I lolled at the affirmative action one...does he think affirmative action applies to enrolling in a class? Anyways. My only solace here is the fact that these rapist cosplayers probably don't leave their bedrooms
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:46 PM
10

How dare you be entitled to living your life the way you want in such a way that affects absolutely no one! To answer your Q: I respond "I don't have time for a serious relationship." It says "I have a fulfilling, busy life and I'm not sacrificing any of it for anyone" without saying it ;)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/07/21 04:15 PM
135

Found the post and...yeah. I'm getting stockholm syndrome vibes big time But also. Thinking back on the situation and my original comment. The red flags were THERE. It's not normal for a man to sleep naked with his daughters past a very young age
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:07 PM
595

Like I hope this is fake cause it's so insane, and the shout-out to reddit anti-favorite "cuties," but also...he sleeps in bed with their kids, the kids run around naked with their friends, they seemingly just moved to this secluded jungle land... How much of this was his idea? Did he coerce her into living in a pedo paradise with him? I'm hoping this isn't real but also.....not surprised if it isn't. Sadly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 09:00 PM
9

I plan to eventually. I don't feel safe at the gym we climbed at because he was not held accountable and the gym also inexplicably fired most women and POC staff around this time, meaning it's a white male run gym and it very much caters to white men. Fortunately I got into lifting heavy and I can lift more than that dude ever could. And I'm half his size. I call that a win!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 06:36 PM
191

You know what my 45yo male boss does when someone makes a mistake in the workplace that slows down the workflow? Yells. Swears. Insults people. Goes on these awful tirades. This is completely public, too. We are in an open office space shared with other groups. He's not a very high-level employee, either, in the grand scheme of things. I've worked here for awhile and I know the signs and how to avoid it. But in my field, this is just normal. I'm actually lucky that he's not as bad as other men i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 11:27 AM
29

No one asked and it's hardly FDS related but I'm posting it here to get it out. We are so obviously slipping into fascism in the US and I feel like so many people are just not seeing it or don't care.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:47 AM
25

Sounds like some Staples or Office Depot shit. You don't need any expertise to be a tech salesperson there and they're so desperate they'll hire anyone. I would report it but assume nothing will come out of it because these companies are so rampant with this behavior It helps to document it though
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/07/21 10:40 AM
42

So many women talking about writing paragraphs to these failed humans. If you're writing paragraphs, that's how you know he hates you. I'll add my own. He purposely taught me to lead rock climb incorrectly (yes he later admitted it was on purpose). I don't know if his end game was me getting kicked out of the gym or falling to my death, but he succeeded in humiliating me horribly. It took me awhile to realize it was deliberate. I don't climb anymore.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 11:04 PM
13

Skylar White vs Jesse Pinkman from Breaking Bad. Folks will argue Jesse is a good guy who got caught up in a bad situation and that Skylar is a total b****
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 11:05 AM
16

Back in my OLD hell I swiped right on a guy who was bottle feeding a kitten in his profile pic. Thought it was cute. He turned out to be a furry.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 10:53 AM
16

I knew a dude (in high school, but he's an adult now) who was a nice guy/incel before those terms existed and he was really, really ugly. He was obsessed with childhood photos of himself. He would say things like "look I had so much potential to be hot!" That's what this made me think of. Though if a dude put a childhood pic in his OLD profile I would just be like damn this dude really has no modern photos of himself at all and this is all he has to work with?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/07/21 10:52 AM
30

It's the dumbest thing. And I have a feeling it comes from being exposed to unwashed sheets more often than the average person via terrible dating choices Now I am also realizing I probably don't smell everyone who doesn't wash their sheets but only the severest cases. Still. It's too many people! Some people I just want to air out with an industrial fan
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 10:27 PM
16

I commented just now on another thread about how attractive, secure men don't say this sort of shit to people. It's always projection. What this particular piece of shit did and said to you is so extreme and evil and uncalled for. I hope you have a therapist to talk to about it. I've been through similar things. Men projecting insecurities onto me and me internalizing their insults. Therapy has been very helpful. My therapist is helping me develop an inner voice that sings louder than these lose…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 06:42 PM
374

I make a game out of this lol. guy makes uncalled for comment about someone's body size on reddit. go to comment history find, without fail, the following things: 1) many other uncalled for comments about other peoples' body size 2) posts about his own weight loss struggle on loseit or the like. WITHOUT FAIL. I once replied to one of these with a link to the commenter's confession of himself being overweight (and it was a really uncalled for comment he made, something like "all horse girls are f…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 05:39 PM
244

Lmfao I know a ton of people who started making six figs right out of school. If she's already making good money AS A COLLEGE STUDENT she clearly has a lucrative skill. Gonna guess she does web design or something Like I have UX designer friends who make bank and work remotely so they travel all the time. in their twenties. This woman is only 23. I hope she leaves this dude and leaves it in the past as a classic early twenties mistake, and goes off to live her dreams!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 05:25 PM
125

I have a really sensitive nose and I can smell mold and mildew quite easily. I can also smell who doesn't change their sheets. Even further...I can smell when a woman spent the night with someone who didn't wash their sheets. Lots of women don't wash their sheets either (I'm horrified to admit I was 20 when I learned how regularly one is supposed to...guess what, my family doesn't wash their sheets) but men in their 20s-30s are the worst offenders. I have two coworkers who don't wash their sheet…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/07/21 05:12 PM
12

Thank you! I am gonna check these out!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 01:47 PM
59

This is a thing that I needed to hear I've been struggling with maintaining my sobriety in post-pandemic summer. Struggling as in, I'm still sober but not having a good time and sometimes questioning my decision. I am not exaggerating when I say everyone around me only wants to drink. And I've been doing a lot of different things with different groups of people. Volunteering, kayaking, daytime gatherings....all somehow involve alcohol. Even alcohol has made its way to my workplace during the day…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 12:02 PM
111

There's a video right now on the "I am a total piece of shit" sub of what appears to be English people trashing a city square. 99.9% men
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 10:50 AM
20

Lmao. First thing I noticed as well. 40 fuckin years old and doesn't know how to go grocery shopping
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 12:34 AM
373

ABSOLUTELY nothing in this story makes sense. In what situation would he, in this order: arrive at her house 40 min early, call/message her, have her disclose she doesn't date short guys, tell he is 5'6" Then she changes her mind, but is willing to go on the date suddenly when he says he's already there (???) and somehow the date goes completely well while he is "schooling" her and apparently it wasn't weird at all that he lied about his height and showed up at her door before she accepted his d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/07/21 12:17 AM
79

Some people have this idea that freedom to do whatever they want, whenever they want, regardless of circumstances is their natural born right. And that anyone who has boundaries is infringing upon that right or "trying to control them/tell them what to do"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/07/21 11:45 AM
9

Aww! I love this. I hope your sweet kitty gets better. My cat...is such a sweet little thing but she loves MEN. The dirtier, hairier, more macho the better. Her favorite are middle aged men who come to the house do to repairs and such and want nothing to do with her. She would die for these men. Women? More feminine men? Forget about it. Their cop husband? ding ding ding I love my cat but she might be a pickme 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 12:15 PM
436

What in the if you give a mouse a cookie is this shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 12:08 PM
45

Schrodinger's Misogyny: men are simultaneously the superior, more intelligent sex and dumb as shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/07/21 02:02 AM
4

I've wondered about Jack Black. Same issue as Danny Devito, though.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 07:00 PM
40

I've known exactly the type from this post and watched it all play out the same exact way. This is what happens. At some point in their early life, a woman "out of his league" (I hate the concept but sadly it is real) will give him a chance. It will end, because he's the type of guy in this post. But after that, she is the bar, the minimum he will accept. He not only wants someone as ___ as her but MORE SO. He wants someone better than his ex. This is how you get so many delusional unattractive …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/07/21 11:56 AM
37

Yeah the moving in thing...I've lived with a roommate who did this. Roommate let the partner move in, not on the lease, and I obliged because the partner seemed chill and my rent would go down. Horrible mistake. That partner was the worst. I only endured it for a few months but goddamn. They also fought ALL THE TIME, so loudly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 11:30 PM
15

There are people who prioritize their partners but also have independent lives and friendships, and then there are people who I'll never get to know one-on-one because their partner is always there. One-on-one time is pretty important to forming a bond of any kind. I have a lot of friends like this who I enjoy seeing at gatherings and sure, we will get a minute or two to chat one-on-one, but I don't consider them close friends and I wouldn't pursue any more of a friendship with them beyond what …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 11:24 PM
207

I once heard this quote about Jordan Peterson and Joe Rogan and the like. On reddit of all places. "Nothing only men like is cool"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 05:33 PM
49

What it's like going back into society and seeing the boyfriends some people picked up during quarantine..
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 02:40 PM
36

Since finding FDS, sobering up, abandoning the dating apps and embracing the single life I've experienced a lot of rejection. Not just from men but from people in general. It's post covid summer and people want to do all the things I let go of. So some people make it clear to me that they find my situation unappealing or strange. Some of my choices are even met with pity. It does sting a little when it happens. But there are always people around that see me and appreciate what I'm doing. And at …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 11:46 AM
27

Yeah, my longest relationship ever was when I was ~20. Dude was very short and thin, nearly my height and weight at the time. This made him seem very non-threatening In our final week he shoved my roommate's cat quite violently and then I discovered he had strangled a girl nearly to death in high school. I connected all the dots. Kid had been acting violently the whole time and I had been overlooking it cause he was a small guy (and cause I was trying so hard to make the relationship into someth…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/07/21 11:29 AM
3

Thank you!! I am just loving your posts today ;D
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 12:43 AM
3

Oh I love this kind of post and reading all the comments! This month I am chilling a bit because I've been working hard and doing a lot recently, so I'm hoping to kind of "coast" through this month, maintaining my progress, but focusing on fun, friends, and keeping my mood and confidence high. I am also going to catch up on lots of doctors visits and appointments I put off due to the pandemic. It's not much but this is a big month for me socially - I got sober during the pandemic, and was also V…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 12:26 AM
32

A rule I'm somehow having trouble enforcing on myself is...do not date guys beneath your fitness level. I'm very fit. So very fit. It was my pandemic outlet but I have been for many years. I like a fit guy but honestly, aesthetically, he doesn't have to be at my level. But he has to be at my level because of the absolute fucking shit men have done and said to me when they are jealous of my discipline. It's hard for me to enforce upon myself because I also hate hate hate competition and gym bro c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/07/21 12:00 AM
41

I always thought this was just another way of saying I sunburn crazy easily
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 12:44 PM
97

Fun fact. Want to know if someone is projecting when they are being mean to you? Challenge them/call them out on it. "Why are you doing/saying that? What's going on?" If it's projection (which it almost always is) they will INSTANTLY break down. It will be messy. And it will be instant. Cause when they do this that shit is just beneath the surface. I don't always recommend it because I've seen grown ass adults fall to pieces at my feet when I call out their unnecessary rudeness but yeah. Just ha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 12:33 PM
5

The single plant lady life is awesome, 10/10 highly recommend
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/07/21 11:30 AM
123

Hey totally unrelated but how much undiluted Clorox does it take to forget this post and my entire life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 09:12 PM
20

I love this but I'm fixated on "corneas" that's a body part not a disease!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 12:23 PM
249

I've legit heard the argument thrown around that bdsm, pedo play, and porn are good actually because they allow would-be rapists/murders to "safely" act out their fantasies. Or something along those lines. Trying not to think too hard about it. But yeah, that's bullshit and this is a good example of how. If someone's fantasy is literally rape or murder, and their "kinky sex" with a partner lets them get sooooo close to the actual thing, what's gonna stop him from just going for it? Basically don…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/07/21 12:08 PM
2

I can't wait for the TIFU post that comes after this. All it takes is for ONE person to google his institution and find out. I almost wanna say hell yeah go for it brother! Buy that PhD!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 04:51 PM
5

That's totally what it was. My mom was always unhappy in her marriage and projected onto me so hard. This alcoholic buffoon came into my life and was sugary sweet to me and my mom (in a manipulative way) for a bit and my mom legit told me she was "jealous I found someone who loved me so much" and used to answer the phone when he called and talk to him before me and like...brag if he told her something before he told me (like apparently she was the first one he told when he got his first DUI...ye…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:47 AM
6

I have no idea. My understanding of the situation was the guy came onto her, though. The response to the car accident though was the truly horrifying part. In that moment I was like holy shit she's a psychopath
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/06/21 10:42 AM
11

Thanks friend. I am doing better now and don't associate with these people! I do need to remind myself regularly how dangerous pickmes are especially as I've been one myself and it's so important I DO NOT fall back into that or let myself be around people like that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 05:56 PM
28

That was this pickme, pretty much. The worst was that she was gorgeous and one of the wealthiest people I have ever met. Inherited millions from her grandparents in her teens. So no one at our age could really match her. Yet she was so insecure. Imagine a 18yo who just inherited millions of dollars from her grandparents laughing at you for having your pelvis shattered in a traumatic accident. That poor girl was in a coma for six months
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 05:55 PM
9

Yeah this behavior turns me off so fast. But the unclean recycling....that is worse than not recycling! Cause if a bin of recyclables is contaminated by oil and mold and crap, it is doomed to the trash. At least in the US where recycling is largely theater (but cardboard and metal are definitely recyclable). My current roommate is exactly like your ex except it's multiple takeouts a day and he recycles shit like unwashed soda cups from McDonald's. He's ok otherwise fine as a roommate, in fact hi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 05:37 PM
62

I have some pickmeisha tales from hell. Mostly from my late teens and early twenties, thank god, but holy hell pickmeishas are incredibly dangerous. I was in an abusive relationship* in my late teens, mainly caused by this guy's raging alcoholism. He got clean and the abuse calmed down a lot. Until my pickme friends begged him to hang out with them so he would buy them alcohol while I was out of town. He never got clean again. one of the above pickmeishas was in her own shitty relationship. He c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 05:09 PM
83

Kinda random, but I see a lot of top page posts on reddit along the lines of: woman talks about thing that women inflict on each other (recent example is "not being able to wear the same outfit twice" if you saw that post) and the highly upvoted clapback is "this is a thing women do to each other, men have nothing to do with it" you know? Well if you respond a similar way when men talk about: male-on-male violence, lack of emotional support from other males, men abusing women causing those women…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 05:00 PM
35

Lol I have so many little petty things that are deal-breakers for me and I'm so glad to have this opportunity to share. owns a specialized "gaming chair" owns mayonnaise. (I don't want to talk about it, but I absolutely cannot risk it happening again) has never worked a customer service job. consumes takeout or delivery more than once in a week doesn't ride a bike takes the elevator over stairs without necessity talks to mom on the phone daily without necessity drives distances < 1 mile without …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/06/21 04:10 PM
24

What do you mean, my dream man is someone who spends all his time reading and obsessing over a women's dating subreddit (Giant backslash s)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 09:55 PM
2

Ha, there is a thread on askmen whining about this exact topic. I clicked it thinking it would be a thread of encouragement to take selfies and shit but it's more like "wah, selfies are hard and not enthusiastically fun to take." Yeah they aren't like going to a carnival... No one takes pics of me either unless I ask or initiate, or I am at an event like a wedding...and I'm pretty sure most people of all genders have the same experience. Not that I really need photos for much but when I made a d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/06/21 09:51 PM
7

Amazing, important post. I need to read this every day.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 09:19 PM
20

Lololol nice try bro The way men who get 0 matches on tinder have completely deluded themselves into believing the logical solution is to go online and tell women to swipe more on people like them
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/06/21 08:39 PM
103

I bit the bait on one of those "dating is unfair cause I get no matches on tinder" posts the other day and basically just said try harder, make your profile more interesting and improve your appearance and women will swipe on your. In came lots of fellers complaining that it's too much effort to have an interesting profile and the only thing they can do is "swipe right on everyone" and somehow the solution to this is "women initiating more and putting more effort into tinder" Like. These dudes p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 06:19 PM
31

Today in men trying to justify their deep despire to commit violence against women
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 06:14 PM
5

Jesus. Yeah that guy sounds like a real piece of work. By which I mean potential psychopath I do need to check out that podcast episode! Thanks. Honestly I think FDS has been one of the most useful spaces for me on the spec. People here don't sugarcoat which is what I neeeeeeed. And yes I usually avoid the manosphere but when I go there I usually end up lol-ing. Weirdly their online spaces are helpful for me on the spec as well because they clearly outline their behaviors and purposes behind the…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 06:04 PM
29

Jesus Christ. That's some really weird shit and it truly tests my current understanding of people (autism ftw). I would never suspect something like that being a test. It just sounds like a time-saving step...what is the alternative here? I guess it is for you to pay for the smoothies but the fact that he did this is so whacky. But I did read some of the manosphere articles about this just now and it's even whackier. They think when a woman rejects a man it is a "shit test" designed to make him …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 02:39 PM
32

I'm somehow even more confused. So was his logic that: if you took his card, you were a gold-digger? If someone like handed me his credit card I would be confused. My ex gave me keys to his condo like, within a month. I never used them but I didn't say no? It was weird and I think I promptly lost them. If it was a shit test it did nothing for anyone
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 02:28 PM
40

This. And for public image. Bill Gates stans back in the day when he was the billionaire to idol-worship would defend his hoarding of wealth by saying "but he donates some of it!"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 02:23 PM
36

I don't totally get the concept of "shit tests" - I thought it was when men do shitty things to see how much the woman will tolerate. But it's the opposite? Is it like...offering to pay and seeing if she will offer to split the bill or something? I looked it up and the top hits are all poorly written PUA and manosphere sites that I have no desire to read in entirety.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/06/21 02:20 PM
21

POV you're a 40 year old virgin wondering why the law doesn't require attractive 20 year olds to marry you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/06/21 10:58 AM
52

This is what really gets me. What they write on that sub is actually really toxic and damaging...for men. We don't play nice here of course but you don't hear people in this sub saying they want to abort male fetuses because they are male, or jokes or even soft references to the idea that any man should commit suicide. Those are just not things women say or joke about. Their creation of that sub and the things they write basically confirm what most of us here know: that men are more cruel to eac…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 11:07 PM
34

The modem equivalent is how men are en masse sacrificed to capitalism and the MIC through drafting and jobs requiring unsafe, repetitive manual labor (mining, etc). It's not right of course and that's a whole other discussion but honestly your second paragraph holds true today. A huge percentage of young men will fail to reproduce and not necessarily by choice. It's interesting to speculate how that contributes to sexually dimorphic behavior
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 11:01 PM
38

Men are like "look FDS is so toxic" and made a sub where they and exclusively other men joke about suicide and murdering children self awarewolves material
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 10:54 PM
157

Having worked at a number of "top" universities, with Nobel laureates and some people regarded as the smartest this or that... ....THIS. None could have done it without their wife. Or in some cases, mom. Doing all their chores, cooking, laundry, and performing for them at night and shit. I wish more people, specifically those who tend to idol-worship, would see this.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 10:27 PM
16

Not to mention it's classic self-sabotage. A very clear sign of a person whose life is a trainwreck ruled by chaos and completely unchecked emotions.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 12:53 PM
24

I've posted here about my ex who I found out, too late, was stalking his ex from high school in the worst way (and now stalks me since we obviously broke up) I found the texts he had been sending her which obviously she never responded to. His texts to her were about details he shouldn't have known, asking about shit like a recent trip and whatnot. In these cases it's worse than stalking cause he's legit, with apparently no fear of consequences, telling her he is stalking her. Psychopath shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 12:35 PM
45

Yeah like, this is on the level of a mentally ill teenager posting with guns outside their high school....if someone did that, they would probably get a visit from the FBI. "Jokes" like this should be investigated by the FBI just like "jokes" about shooting up a school are
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 11:47 AM
195

The obvious has been pointed out but I'll add...these dads are, in essence, threatening to shoot children who date their children. I feel like posting a picture of you lowkey threatening a child with a gun on the internet should be taken extremely seriously
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 10:43 AM
10

Sounds like a real piece of work (narcissist) but I specifically want to say you do not want to spend your life with someone who does the Contrarian thing like that. I promise you, you will feel so light and free after you end it. It's so exhausting to have to explain and defend every single thing you say and that has probably been eating away at you in ways you won't know until it's over.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/06/21 02:02 AM
118

Go to any AskReddit thread that is addressed to women (or usually "ladies") and count how many of the responses are by men. They can't comprehend not being asked their opinion. In their head their opinion is always relevant. They hear a question and respond to it without thinking because that's the default. Pausing to listen to someone else's answer isn't an action their brain can produce. Hear question? Answer. If someone else answers first, that's ok cause now they have more time to plan and r…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 01:30 PM
69

Men are like I'm gonna impersonate a big bad FDSer heheheheheeee 🤡 and their "impression" is literally just being a male redpiller and occasionally saying "QUEEN"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 01:23 PM
5

So I want to do this but I think his behavior falls short of that. He doesn't send anything threatening that makes me fear for my safety. laws seem to say that that is a requirement for an RO. Or him using multiple means to contact me. I don't want to spend a lot of time or energy on this. I just want him to get a really hard slap on the wrist by society cause it's just bonkers that someone can be this old and think this behavior is okay. So the RO would be symbolic abd not because I am actually…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 10:43 AM
12

I legit just posted about this in the weekly chat. I needed to vent about it but don't want to tell people about it IRL for a lot of reasons. And alas, this post! Yes, I am dealing with this now and have been for almost a year. I blocked him on everything. He got in a few times with sneaky means and finally I have enjoyed a few months of radio silence. But I got a new phone a while back and this one apparently stores messages from blocked numbers in a spam folder. He's been texting me monthly. G…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/06/21 12:36 AM
28

Tldr ex still texts my phone after I blocked him and I can see the texts, it's been too long for this to be acceptable So I am livid. I just discovered by accident that even when I block someone, I still technically receive their messages (Google phone). They just go to a "blocked" folder. . So my last relationship lasted about six months and ended over a year ago. It was awful: lots of future-faking/love-bombing followed by major mask slippage and total lvm narcissist manchild behavior. Porn ad…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/06/21 05:28 PM
63

Sounds like a neg, and that he was trying using that to try to get you to buy one of his properties. Aka he brought redpill bs into his business Aka he should probably go out of business. Even if this isn't the case the situation sounds really inappropriate and unprofessional and I would not want to do business with him
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 06:27 PM
29

Seriously. Also men who continue to stalk and attempt to reach out to exes after NC has been established and the woman has clearly moved on. I'm dealing with this now. It's so violating.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 03:39 PM
12

On the spec' myself and between you and me and the other folks on the spec' - You might benefit from limiting your time on this sub and making sure you balance it with real-world experience. Here there is a lot of focus on the negative (and for good reason - we need a place to talk about it to learn how to avoid it) and for me at least, sometimes if I spend too much time here it kind of expands to fill my brain if that makes sense. Happened during the pandemic when I was interacting with people …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:52 PM
55

There are two main reasons men will insist on Snapchat. The messages disappear. READ RECEIPTS. it's one of the only apps where you can't prevent the sender from knowing if you've read their message or not. Built-in infrastructure for "safely" sending nudes comes in third but the first two are the real reasons. If he suggests Snapchat for a primary talking method, block and delete.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:42 PM
185

I said it once and I'll say it again a million times Dating apps are literally wading through a sewer looking for a wedding ring. You owe it to yourself to stay out of the sewer. We need to get off these apps. All women. Let the apps die and force people to put effort into dating again instead of doing it from the safety of their toilet.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/06/21 12:37 PM
271

Here's another thing. NVM date women to bring ANY KIND of value to their lives because, well they themselves have no value. How many guys do you know, or have dated, who are nothing at all and have nothing to show for themselves since they turned 18? But they have a girlfriend. And that girlfriend is the source of everything they appear to have or bring to any situation. I think of Bevers from Broad City (probably not a FDS approved show, but hilarious alas and that character was spot on).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/06/21 12:06 PM
5

Ohhhhhhh I gotta get those stickers for similar reasons!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 10:11 PM
5

Regulation is a must. This is insane. 30 women on this lawsuit and is this even the only one?? And these are just the women who FOUND OUT. how many more videos are on that website of non-consenting minors who haven't found out?? And watch the company be slapped with a fine or settlement that amounts to mere pennies, if that!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 10:10 PM
2

YEP. That is the feature that misogynists hate I am referring to 🤣🤣 funny enough I went short to get a loser ex off my back in high school. He had told me he would never talk to me again if I cut my hair. So I did! And it looked and felt so amazing I never went back. Thanks Justin, for that lil push I needed to get my best hair ever!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 08:31 PM
17

I wouldn't call myself ugly but definitely not conventionally attractive. I have some features that misogynists particularly dislike. ...so I can spot this type of guy easily. I could always spot it in my friends shitty new boyfriends when I was younger. They never cared. "But he's always so nice to me!" Yes and how long until you're no longer shiny and new to him and he starts treating you exactly the same way as he treats me? That last part is key. Someone who acts like this doesn't respect "a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/06/21 12:15 PM
31

Yeah this was my experience in 2003. But that was also around the year I first saw internet porn. Me and my brothers shared a family computer and had free roam of the (albeit slow) internet some nights. They of course showed me the porn. Thinking about this more I would guess gen Z is probably the true "first generation" to grow up with internet porn cause even though we had it, we didn't have constant access to it, you're right. So porn addiction wouldn't have set in so fast.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 07:11 PM
29

This is great to know and I am gonna remember your username for if it ever happens! I absolutely agree. I knew about porn addiction but this is the space that showed me just how prevalent it is and how much of a problem it is. The top post on ask reddit right now is about porn addiction. My jaw dropped. I have never seen the topic on the front page before
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 06:11 PM
72

The thought of this extending to primary school makes my stomach drop. And the fact that I hadn't considered that is so revealing of the lack of awareness. I think it's very hard for adults (esp. parents of young kids) to acknowledge this problem because it's so absolutely horrific. No one wants to think of their son in fifth grade raping another child or of their daughter being the victim. We tell ourselves it can't or won't happen. Adults don't believe their daughters or the victims of their s…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 05:57 PM
46

I had a similar experience and I was born in the early 90s. So I would probably shift it even earlier then to include late 80s. I guess that's just like ...millennials then. But I think gen Z is the first generation where most if not all had access to on demand free porn for their entire chidlhoods. The true guinea pigs of the great porn experiment
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 05:47 PM
103

I have been looking into this, trying to figure out the "first generation to grow up with porn." Here's what I came up with: Say in 2003, the internet is widely available enough that kids are able to surf the internet freely and unsupervised and stumble upon porn. 8 year olds in 2003 were born in 1995. So being a bit conservative, it seems like kids born in the 1990s are the first to grow up with porn. Late 90s - gen Z would be the first to grow up with pornhub and similar websites. It's really …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 04:45 PM
-3

Honestly I just don't think we are interpreting the situation the same way. If you read my comment I gave the advice you take issue with in a conditional. I never said she has an obligation to do anything and in fact I said my opinion is she should leave her alone. She doesn't need to be hostile and neither do you. We can disagree.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 02:48 PM
2

I agree with some of this but I was coming at it from an angle of women supporting women. Not trying to say OP should lower herself but if OP, like most of us needed to learn how to get to where she's at (let's be real - people who knew this stuff already probably aren't on this sub?), there's no harm in sharing how she did it. It's just unnecessary to be so cruel and hostile honestly. It's just adding to what sounds like a very petty workplace Also im gonna be real here. OP's title and post are…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 02:29 PM
78

Jeff, is that you?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 11:30 AM
79

Omg I love that she remarried so quickly and that he's a teacher. I like to assume that means he has some character. What an absolute queen. And I do notice how badly she wants to de-center herself in this story. But in having that mindset she's setting such a powerful example.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/06/21 11:28 AM
36

Kinda sounds like she wasn't his ex
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 11:33 PM
4

TW TW TW TW TW Wow, like...same. really. Very similar story. He was my middle school boyfriend and he begged and begged and begged and begged and I would end up "compromising" by touching his dick over his pants (while VISIBLY disgusted! I was a child!). Once he made me play a board game where if I lost I had to suck his dick. I lost. I didn't do it but he begged and begged and begged and begged One time he got me to cave and tried to uh, go in...and my vag was sealed shut like a clam. And he ke…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 10:45 PM
14

Twice for me, two different guys. High school. First one I was blackout drunk and passed out. I don't totally believe he did it but he told me he did the next morning and showed me a used condom as "proof." Second I spent the night at some guys (a "friend" who I trusted for some reason) house because I was having trouble at home and didn't feel safe. Woke up with his hand down my pants. He admitted to it over text the next day, saying he interpreted some movement in my sleep as consent. God I wi…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 10:39 PM
2

Yeah ok I am on the spec' and at the end of my alcoholic days my body was just rejecting the alcohol and I would often pass out from drinking. When it happened publicly at a gathering I was mortified. It was one of the last gatherings I drank at. This dude is really like "yeah I pass out in public" like it's not weird? Dude
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 05:50 PM
5

Yeah I know a handful of "life coaches" mostly from undergrad. They are all wealthy white males who travel and fuck around with their parents money and have never had a real job. They really think they have unlocked some secret life hack with their own brain powers or whatever, the secret to "happiness" and "working on your own terms" when really that's just called being born wealthy
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 05:47 PM
20

Recovering alcoholic here and Yes. THIS. Not tryna blame my choices on others to be clear, it's more of a reason for my behavior than an excuse. I remember when I first realized the magic of drugs and alcohol in reducing my annoyance with men and distaste for bad sex.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 04:30 PM
23

Haha no, more like a highly-practiced internet ranter. Glad you enjoyed it! 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 01:00 PM
73

For some, high school is the best time of their life because they have "adult-like" thoughts and behaviors but they are still treated like a child, ie everything is done for them and handed to them. They still have mummy and/or daddy. No rent no bills just an education you didn't have to work for or choose and whatever else your parents provide. I have met a lot of dudes who talk about how they were sooo cool, so smart and talented, etc in high school and they maintain their life at 17 as the pe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 11:19 AM
8

One thing I think people don't realize is that many people gaslight unintentionally. They think their own truth is the only truth and are completely unaware of the various cognitive biases they hold and that reality is perception. When those people happen to also generally disrespect and/or hate women, the lived experience of women might never cross their mind. So when a woman says she felt like ___ or experienced ___ and it doesn't match up with what he experienced, or has warped his memory int…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 10:13 AM
26

One thing I think people don't realize is that many people gaslight unintentionally. They think their own truth is the only truth and are completely unaware of the various cognitive biases they hold and that reality is perception. When those people happen to also generally disrespect and/or hate women, the lived experience of women might never cross their mind. So when a woman says she felt like ___ or experienced ___ and it doesn't match up with what he experienced, or has warped his memory int…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/06/21 10:13 AM
4

My nvx used to make me feel like shit for doing nothing in my free time, not working out enough, not working hard enough at my job...of course, in hindsight it was all projection and I was just a sponge for that stuff. But, like a poster pickme I really took up a whole ass new sport. It checked the boxes. I got more on shape, had things to do in my down time, and...ok it didn't affect my job much but whatever. I forget what prompted it but I later pointed out near the end of our miserable affair…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 11:54 PM
87

Uhhhhhnmmmmm....I guess it's been like 30 mins since Iast did?? 😂😭 I love this sub cause I feel like I can experience a lot of collective cringing here without judgment. I have a lot of stories about the horrendous behavior of myself and others, and I hope sharing them here helps someone (or at the very least, makes someone laugh or smile).
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 11:38 PM
13

Society needs to start valuing traits like empathy and compassion. Right now those are the worst traits to have - they've been branded as "sensitive," "emotional" (which somehow has been branded as the opposite of "logical"), weak, etc. Instead society has chosen to worship abusive psychopathic CEOs/billionaires as if their success, which is was possible without mass exploitation of others, is the gold standard for existence. And then every. Single. Day. On this stupid website you see the same p…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/06/21 11:42 AM
29

Maybe this isn't universal but if something feels off. Ever. If he says something and it runs you wrong, if you feel a new insecurity popping up since you met him, if you feel the need to audition, etc. It's your gut telling you something. If you feel that way then start analyzing his behaviors. And you'll often find something. Maybe it was the way he cut you off ever so slightly when you were talking, the way he was telling a story and talked a little weird about one of the characters, the way …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 02:40 PM
65

Might as well have just said "I realized I couldn't do any better"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 01:34 PM
50

This is how this dude I know talks about the exes he keeps around for emotional support. Calls them crazy and abusive but when you ask why he still talks to them...this If you're still talking to an ex, stop. He's using you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/06/21 01:06 PM
22

Absolutely. I feel like it needs a more specific term. It's on the level of causing someone else illness, poisoning, deliberate harm...ok I guess that's all just abuse. But like this specific trend needs a name so people can be aware especially those with allergies and dietary needs because damn if I had celiac or something I would need to really vet someone before letting them anywhere near my food. And I know for a fact I wouldn't have had the guts/skills to do that in my worst pickme days
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 02:03 PM
64

There needs to be a word for people who do this - secretly poison people with allergies because they think they know better or they "don't believe" the person. I want to name it and shame it. It's too common.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/06/21 12:07 PM
15

Some of the worst lies I have seen on dating apps, as a treat for you all I lived with a mega LVM once in a house with some other people in college and occasionally we dog sat this big fluffy dog (like, maybe twice) I found his tinder profile and he had photos of ...just the dog. Not even him in it. Two photos. Another guy who I went on a few dates with had some photos with a dog. I asked him about it and apparently it was his family's dog and it had recently died because they left it in the car…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 11:28 PM
13

Wow this triggered me cause I know exactly what you are talking about. Those guys are usually the super aggressive drivers too (I'm usually on a bike in the city and am a quiet observer to SO much road rage). The videos of drivers attacking other drivers or cyclists are almost always that type too. Angry men in suits ready to flip any second Yeah that type is exactly what scares me tbh. The psychopathic CEO type...like if they're that unhinged and public AND somehow have a high-level position, y…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:56 PM
9

Random but I saw a certain post on 2X and it reminded me of a question I've had that I think is best suited for here. I had a medical abortion at 5 weeks when I was younger. Caught it early, got into a clinic the next day, wham bam thank you ma'am, and that was that. Now, whenever I see a doctor for seemingly any reason, they ask if I have ever been pregnant. I say yes because well technically I was. They ask the outcome and I say terminated. It has never been a problem. But I don't entirely fee…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 11:51 AM
44

This is what kills me about the "Karen" meme cause the most unhinged folks having public meltdowns, not paying tips, bring rude to service staff, being completely insane in a vehicle, etc...are usually men, in my experience. But you only see videos of women freaking out online cause men are afraid to film other men acting like this. I would be, some of the public mantrums I have seen are downright scary.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 11:39 AM
3

I see this shit on reddit like once a month and it drives me mad. I would like to make a sub dedicated to specifically this sort of thing, to have a communal place to make fun of it. But I will need a witty name and that might take some time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:07 AM
1

Academic woman who checks a lot of these boxes myself, sadly. Working in it! But seriously its an outdated system based on old white elitism where everyone wants to be the best and the smartest, to get the best prize or get that covered tenure track job or whatever so it breeds a ton of insecurity. Combine that with low pay (if pay!), minimal mental health services depending on the uni, unclear end date that depends largely on luck in some cases, HUGE alcohol culture in the field...yeah. you get…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/06/21 12:01 AM
8

Like........wasn't the big thing with Oxfam their white executives paying for sex with local Haitians living in poverty? I may be misunderstanding what happened, or perhaps something has happened since
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/06/21 11:32 PM
20

I cringed so hard reading this minutes ago and I haven't recovered. I cannot unclench my jaw. This is so viscerally and deeply upsetting
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 01:46 AM
33

Oh shit oh shit oh shit I have experienced this The solo shows/"bits" and such...he would make up some little joke or song or stupid childish thing, I would hate it, and he would repeat it all the time. It was SO ANNOYING and such a turn-off. He would do it during sex. Literally killed the mood multiple times and wondered why our sex life died within 3 months
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/06/21 01:42 AM
168

He really said "I perform for my male friends ONLY" 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 10:43 AM
146

Not them, but single mothers still bad
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/06/21 01:40 AM
24

Yeah this is all honestly how it went down for me starting at 13. Shows and movies like Skins, Thirteen, even the stupid "soaps" like One Tree Hill really played up the party and give 0 fucks while you're young life for me. Fuck those shows. At the end all the kids get into ivy league schools (except the ones that legit died) and become super successful, etc In absence of a functional family to teach me basic shit like how to navigate relationships, I learned it all from those shows. There were …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 11:13 PM
96

Like it's not just that men won't date a sex worker. They won't date a sex worker past or present. I've done so many LV things in my life the main one being significant, severe substance abuse. Somehow never got into sex work or anything close to it. never even sent a nude. So I don't know what I'm talking about but lemme tell you, some people don't want to date anyone with a dirty past no matter how far away you are from it, no matter what your reasons were for doing it or how little it affects…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/06/21 06:50 PM
4

I wish I could dig up all the old posts I made when this was happening to me in my last relationship, before I found this sub. He had five entitled, loud, rude siblings, a distant/judging father, and a mom who was very nice but generally busy helping her completely helpless (teen/adult) children function and doing chores for them. He would fuck off to, I don't even know...and expect me to just mingle with these kids who won't even look you in the eye or pretend to listen and just butt in to what…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 11:39 AM
14

Also it's not like being a woman = random people everywhere just want to be your friend and listen to you?? In fact there's the whole opposite sex that specifically doesn't want to do either of those things but might pretend to because they want to fuck you Also is there a way to report YouTube comments to the FBI lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/06/21 11:14 AM
98

I know a dude who is having a daughter and he says he wanted a girl because "he wants to raise a powerful woman" It's a nice sentiment but my pickme mom said the same thing (she raised 2 pickme daughters) and it just rubs me wrong to hear someone say that. Like ok anyone can say that but what will you do I just don't want to hear about people's weird gender expectations when they are having a kid. I want to see someone say I will love my child whoever they are and leave it at that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 11:39 PM
145

The saddest thing about that sub is that it's a handful of the same usernames posting the majority of the content. Like, there are individuals that hate this sub so much they devote that much time and energy to doing all this. Really echoes that quote that I will attempt to paraphrase: when women hate men we leave them alone. when men hate women they do the opposite
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 02:55 AM
205

Whenever I see this I assume the guy is a walking dunning-kruger effect who thinks women are dumb/inferior, thus he feels the need to specify he wants an intelligent woman. And the "someone who can keep up" thing I always took literally to assume he probably jackhammers in bed lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/06/21 02:47 AM
36

I think about this whenever I hear people talk about their future children A) as if their existence is certain to occur and B) in a way that implies they expect said future children will be completely healthy. Also when a baby is born unexpectedly disabled or has significant needs, how often does the dad leave? I would love to see stats. All of this is kind of pushing me to the childfree side of the fence. Among other things. It's important to think about before having a kid - could I truly acce…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 11:59 PM
6

Yeah I honestly have to agree like, idk why we don't treat a complete lack of empathy/theory of mind/EQ as an intellectual disability of a sort Probably cause male supremacy but yeah.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 10:05 PM
127

It's sad cause it's actually a very important job! Plastic surgeons are so necessary for things like breast reconstructions (which may be medically necessary for some, say those with back problems), post-burn or post-accident care (say if someone suffers severe facial damage), gender affirmation surgery, etc. I knew a girl as a kid who completely shattered her pelvic area in an accident and had it totally fixed and she even had a baby later in life But of course, there's the side of it where wea…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 01:08 PM
56

Oh god yes. Funny enough, the justification for pre-clinical (animal) studies not using females is because there is so much "variability" in female biology and behavior. As more regulatory agencies require females to be used in studies...we are finding out that's not true (both males and females have significant variability lol) and that shockingly there are differences between male and female animals in ways you would never imagine. just by including females in your study you get a whole paper …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 12:47 PM
107

Edit: posting the link to the story BEFORE my little monologue because the comments are amazing https://www.comicsands.com/aita-replacing-expensive-shampoo-relationship-2645548965.html This post, comment, all line up with something I've noticed in some people. Not just men (thinking of a certain just no MIL story I read once) but certainly many of them. It's like an inability to understand that bodies are different on the inside. No concept of biodiversity. So any illness, allergy another person…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/06/21 12:17 PM
105

Yeah the "my way or the highway" mindset is one of my biggest pet peeves. It says so much about a person. One kind of funny example of this...a guy asked me out in college. I was down. He asked if I wanted to go to a very specific BBQ restaurant. I'm vegetarian and I said this. Turns out he had a gift card and that's why he wanted to go. But he just dropped the topic entirely and did not pursue a date Long story short...major bullet dodged, dude is a total mess. Like "idolizes Bojack Horseman" m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 10:50 PM
26

Lol yeah an old ex always wanted to hang out together and "do work." Like his idea of quality time was being in the same room doing work. Not a horrible idea in theory since my work involves a lot of writing but very horrible idea when he's a software developer who has tantrums about his work like four times a day. Kinda distracting to be around someone who audibly yells and swears whenever they have an issue
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 05:37 PM
35

Closure isn't a thing! A breakup is closure. No one "needs" "closure" from the other person after a breakup! Here is my version aimed at the men who lurk here and the women who need to hear what a man means when he says he "needs closure" - Do you need closure or do you want to feel powerful and in control over another person one last time, so you go to the last person who made you feel this way? Do you need closure or do you want to milk every last drop of empathy and attention out of someone w…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/06/21 11:43 AM
46

I was just thinking about this too. What are his conversations with his mom like? I then became deeply sad. You know this happens often from the post. He calls his mommy whenever his wife isn't behaving, like a dog he's training. "Yeah mommy she's being a b**** again, can you bring me some tendies? Pweeeeeaàase?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 11:11 PM
31

Yeah I rage-commented this in the weekly chat (wasn't sure if this post would go up, there's always a delay) but basically: this is a peak example of how men are the primary cause of the "men's mental health" epidemic. Yeah we criticize men here but it's generally valid criticism about his behaviors and life choices or lack thereof. At worst, body-shaming. I have never heard anyone here joke or talk about male suicide in this way. I've never heard someone wish death on a man (except maybe those …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 10:38 PM
59

I am not willing to risk the first time my future partner sees my face being when he's taking a messy shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 02:00 PM
11

I made a post about it but don't think it made the cut/it might be better suited here I've seen that "male suicide is misogynistic" post going around that is obviously written by a male troll, but is being attributed to this sub. It's atrocious. I don't know if the goal was for it to make it look like that's what this sub thinks or not, but that's clearly the effect That's not so much my issue as the fact that this is the kind of hateful shit MEN write on the internet. this is why FDS doesn't al…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 11:34 AM
24

I'm not into OLD in general. It makes it way too easy for men to lie and perform a personality to get laid. This summer though...it's gonna be that on steroids cause how many men do you really think are gonna upload honest, current (aka post pandemic weight gain/raggedy hair) photos? How many men are gonna say they love hiking or tennis or whatever when they haven't touched those hobbies in a year and a half??? Folks are hornier/more desperate after a year of isolation and I've noticed many men …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/06/21 11:28 AM
2

I forgot this existed. I blocked it out of my mind. I dated a dude in tech briefly and he was...really into this. Could be the guy in this post TBH. Same type of person. When he explained it to me I just couldn't believe it exists and I blocked it out of my mind. That's gotta be the most toxic place on Earth
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 11:25 PM
6

I came here to say this! Like.... Dust? Hair? Mold? Grease build-up behind the stove? Trash? You know, shit that occurs as a byproduct of human existence indoors?? Things breaking? Lawn care? Weather damage? Pollen? Lady bugs? Spider webs? Like my dude have you existed in a place before
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 11:13 PM
1

Ha! Unfortunately my mum is guilty of this as well. She doesn't use terms like "logical" or "rational" thank god but she might as well
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 10:37 PM
29

What is the term for this type of bias, if anyone knows? Maybe it's more than bias. Might just be narcissism. It's so insidious and so impossible to deal with. The only response is to walk away. Because ironically, it's a sign that the person is so irrational that they cannot be reasoned with in any way. The paradox of the "logical man"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/06/21 11:48 AM
11

This is great! One thing I think about with the red pill crowd...they all follow the exact same playbook and it's so obvious once you know the signs. So all we need to do is raise awareness of their tactics to defeat that whole movement. I guess FDS is pretty much doing that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 08:15 PM
108

I'm screaming because I'm surrounded by people like this talking for the sake of talking, sometimes without having a complete thought never listens, only waits for their turn to speak can't wait that long so interrupts finishes your sentences for you tells the same stories and jokes over and over again, no regard for how bored you are by it ,- his favorite joke to tell is the "there's no punchline" joke because it allows him to talk for as long as he wants to an awaiting audience talks too loud …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 07:38 PM
10

Just say you don't like fruit bro, don't generalize your personal preferences to half the population lmao
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 07:31 PM
118

You'll see this or in some cases yeah people talking about his mental health. He needs help, etc. What could have caused him to act this way? They ask. They look for a motive. People have a really hard time believing a white man can commit heinous acts because he's a shit person, fundamentally flawed himself - they believe clearly some other factor must have caused this. Best example: Chris Watts You don't really see that when women act out. They are labeled as Karens, trashy, entitled b****, et…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 07:27 PM
70

Yeah I came here to say this. Every single one. Just a new way for men to guilt women into having bad, selfish sex
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/05/21 01:37 AM
17

This is actual people I know, full stop. Selling hoarded toilet paper at a markup and shit calling it a business or hustle Also people flipping sneakers. It's scalping. I get it can be lucrative but gosh do something else with your time, no one wants to hear about how excited you are to buy some new shoes and then sell them
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/05/21 01:37 PM
26

Yeppp or "I went to therapy once and I wasn't instantly fixed so it's a scam" I've heard em both 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:44 PM
48

Or that and he has completely untreated major depression.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:41 PM
28

I dated a guy who had a complex about this stuff. Like, he had to be doing an extreme, elite ($$$) thing and would not be caught dead doing something "boring" (kayaking, casual hiking, etc). He would drop thousands on some new hobby at random until some minor blow to his ego ruined the activity for him forever. That's a hell of a lifestyle to keep up. It was exhausting for me and he of course had to do it all alone because ego
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:32 PM
13

Also some guys just are too scared to do this stuff alone and/or want a truly adventurous person to "get them into it." Dude probably had a camping trip planned for months and just needed someone to go with him. So annoying.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:12 PM
8

I've never ever heard of a guy fetishizing periods. That's fucking disgusting. Throw the whole man out, shut it all down...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 10:07 PM
144

😭😂 nor is visible, completely unmanaged DANDRUFF. in your BEARD? ARMPITS? Gtfo. You nasty. (saying this as someone with dandruff who did the bare minimum work to find a management solution, aka I tried multiple shampoos and found one that works for me)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:38 PM
99

Legit I was reading this and thinking "all we want is for men to do all the shit we are expected to do" Like I want a dude to say to my face that these standards are unfair for men AND women. I want him to say that whatever standard is too high, is too high for women as well. I'll open my DMs
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:35 PM
109

What's the word for an out-of-shape dude who tries to date a fit girl so she'll be his free personal trainer? Laughing in their faces doesn't seem to get the point across
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/05/21 12:30 PM
10

There's something so unspeakably tragic about anticipating cake and being denied said cake. At least there was cake at the wedding but it was just plain old cake yellow cake with white frosting, not the beautiful thing they had on display
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 02:16 PM
27

Ha, this hits home. it's like I was fed all this crap and just threw it up. I HATE weddings. I say no to all of the invites. It's like if everything I hated came together. I hate dressing up, sitting still, churches/religious institutions, alcohol, all of it. I only like cake. Last wedding I did attend, the anticipation for cake was really the only thing getting me through the reception. It was so beautiful. Y'all the cake was fake. I think I cried.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/05/21 11:53 AM
6

Buying a megaphone so I can shout this from a rooftop
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 11:35 PM
115

so much to unpack here but can I just say, it's so boring when a guy is like "I love to eat and travel" and that's his whole personality, like my dude we all like to eat and travel
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 11:18 PM
89

You can also see the expansion of his lower half of his body. Dude is a chonk. It's not even bad, I wouldn't swipe left cause of it. But don't make your lies so obvious dude
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 11:15 PM
16

Hello yes I am a product of this era Wish I could take back my vote cause I was feeling defensive of the word 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 01:50 AM
70

That's fucking disgusting. Like a goddamn monkey at the zoo. Dudes a sex offender.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/05/21 01:45 AM
19

Some dudes have legit humiliation fetishes too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 11:43 PM
6

I honestly have no idea but it occurred regularly. Fortunately we had a second bathroom.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 07:43 PM
204

Yeah like...it's honestly so obvious when something is up with a guy especially if something is new. You can tell the moment the honeymoon phase is over, the moment he has eyes for someone new, etc. Their behavior is so loud. So you do what reddit says and "communicate" and of course he fucking lies! Every time! If he's unilaterally ending the relationship but stringing you along, that's dishonest in itself so yeah this is the type of dude who absolutely will lie if confronted. So he lies. Maybe…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 11:54 AM
36

I always say if you feel like you have to snoop that should be it, the relationship should be over right then and there. If you don't trust him there's a reason. Either it's you and your insecurities which you need to work on or more likely it's his behavior that is rubbing you wrong. Either way...it's no recipe for a healthy relationship. I say "I always say" when in the past I haven't taken my own advice but every time I did snoop I did find something that confirmed my fears or worse. Because …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 11:49 AM
57

I would use the term "pawing" even. And I have seen that exact term used here and I just know exactly what it is Fucking weird little infantilistic shit, it is such a turn-off. Like what are you a baby? That's not hot to me at all wtfh
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 02:03 AM
78

Yeah I'm not proud of this one but I read a dude's..."journal" In all fairness, it was just a scrappy notepad and something caught my eye. The open page was something like "I texted her again..." Omg. I had known about his ex (from high school...we were mid twenties) and how it was a "rough breakup" but I was not prepared to discover the depths of his obsession with her. Strewn across scraggly notebook pages. Dates ranging YEARS to fairly recent (none from when we were dating, and we only dated …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 01:55 AM
129

Oooh I have some calls it "fapping" talks about porn ever, in open casual conversation premature OR very delayed ejaculation (basically he can't get off on real sex with people) asymmetrically bent dick tries to initiate sex by just..grabbing your bits or pawing at them. No romance or foreplay, just gimme! now! stays up really late for no good reason he wants to try things he clearly has no experience doing asks for nudes
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 12:29 AM
77

Omg I had a roommate who took his laptop to the bathroom and would stay there an hour+ I thought he just didn't eat enough fiber
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/05/21 12:18 AM
6

I worked in retail for years in high school and I'm just now unpacking how fucking predatory the men were there. It was a chain store that sells big heavy things like appliances. They hired a lot of teens - girls would be cashiers, bigger boys would stock shelves + smaller boys would be cashiers. They also employed a lot of people in their later.twenties, including a lot of men who just never went anywhere after high school and stayed stocking shelves or became middle management. The job paid be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 10:33 PM
41

Yeah last guy I dated was literally on dating apps, pursued ME, asked ME out, gave me keys to his apptment within a month, said he loved me within 2, introduced me to his parents and coworkers within 3, said he wanted to plan a trip with me, yadeeyadeeyah. None of this was initiated by me or really what I wanted at all (too fast for me) but I went with it bc pickme He really said "I never wanted a relationship" at the end 🤣 like dude you were trying SO HARD to have a relationship, let's not kid …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 10:04 PM
16

I have 7 followers. Idk if they are FDS members who think I'm hilarious or...creepy men who stalk FDS members. Hi, followers. Why do you follow me? I also have DMs turned off. Nothing to gain from following me really. Most of my comments aren't that funny
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 09:38 PM
26

All I see everywhere I go these days are beautiful, well-dressed, fit women with the most...not any of that men. So many gorgeous women date down when they are going and then the guy spends the rest of his life thinking that's what he "deserves."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 09:36 PM
17

In my personal experience, they don't. I'm sure there are some that do but even guys I've known who seem like they would know better just have it out in plain sight. Also, the number of times I've used someones laptop to google something or put on a video and porn has autofilled when I the web address. Just type "reddit" and see what comes up. Or the letters p and x.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 01:36 PM
42

I wanna start a service for peoole. I will look up any man for you and I WILL find whatever he is hiding. Cause for me it is so easy. I find this stuff within minutes about every dude cause they don't bother to hide it. They'll use their full legal name on pornhub ffs If I was dating a guy and saw him following a single porn anybody it would be over. No one accidentally follows porn actresses unless they're on the page to begin with.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 11:41 AM
12

hey, not all men!! 😂🤣🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy24/05/21 11:36 AM
18

Especially ironic since it's the "not all men!" crowd doing this. The same dudes who screech about women generalizing behaviors of most men to all men will take cherry-pick one comment from 2018 to make some absurd claim
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 07:53 PM
21

Free advertising 😆😘💅
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 07:51 PM
23

Also it's like a full paragraph entirely about himself. It's a monologue You know this dude is fucking unbearable IRL
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 01:06 PM
82

Ugh. And so much of his classic comedy is about his life with his wife but like, not in a complainy boomer "I hate my wife" way. I legit was so happy about that. Bar is so low.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 01:02 PM
272

I saw a dude at the gym ask out two different ladies within the same hours and both said no lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/05/21 12:57 PM
35

Holy fuck ok my dude was not that bad
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 10:37 PM
85

There's this dude I knew from high school who calls himself a "trad" whatever and posts self-pity all over social media about how hard it is to find a "trad wife." He's also a "born again catholic" or something, very alt-right/pro-trump, posts a lot of racist and sexist nonsense (a lot of shit about "black women aborting their babies" and pro-life shit) But is he, at least, a "trad man" who could provide for a family? Also no. He is morbidly obese, has a useless degree, constsntly unemployed, an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/05/21 06:57 PM
43

I don't know shit about JP but I all the posts on the sub dedicated to him that make the front page are pretty cringey Joe Rogan = huge red flag. He's the new Alex Jones but slightly less unhinged.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:58 PM
38

I have known one FWB who could consistently. one! And I think one other time a boyfriend got lucky, but he never succeeded again. And I don't even fake it! I've had boyfriends who cared, tried all the things and just couldn't. I thought I was broken. And then I met that one FWB. Too bad we were both LV people at the time and had 0 other good qualities
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 09:52 PM
16

If he wanted to he would. And if he doesn't want to he should not be wasting your time. It's quintessentially low value for a guy to keep a woman around as a placeholder that he doesn't actually want. If he's with you but being low effort, lazy...yeah he's not into you but hes also not someone you should be into either because he cannot be alone. He is codependent. What other kind of person needs a placeholder girlfriend at all? Someone who cannot be alone with themself. Someone who will leech e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 12:26 AM
23

aside from the many, many slang terms for vagina that are also slurs...Does this fellow not recall that "dick" and "ass" are also negative terms for people....
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 12:13 AM
80

"holes" too
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/05/21 12:10 AM
101

That's so ridiculous. They really think we are so dumb. Even when I was full-on clueless pickme I didn't fall for that. Ghosting then returning = he thought he found someone "better"/could find someone "better" and it didn't work out so he thinks you must have just been waiting for him all this time like Rapunzel in her castle because he really truly can't fathom that people move on and forget about him, that he's not that uniquely special and central to everyone's life. It is a behavior that sp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 10:49 PM
52

Also honestly if the game were getting free meals there are SO many better ways, lol. I hate restaurant dates. They're so risky. Honestly the biggest fear for me is that I will be stuck sharing a meal with someone with nasty table manners. I hate that shit. I would never risk that unless I really really liked the dude. No free meal is worth unpleasant company
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 11:24 AM
5

Y'all. If you want to see this but worse r slash social skills - "women are people" post
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 01:53 AM
16

That story is so clearly made up too 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 01:45 AM
24

I like to think people can change but it takes a long time and a ton of work. Like, years and years of therapy and commitment and introspection. I say this because well, I wasn't raised right. I have a long ugly history of substance abuse from my early teens. My mother put me down all the time, kept me small to feel better about herself, basically raised me to be a racist insecure pickme. I've been on my own for ten years and I've come a long way. Still have ways to go. I will say, I think women…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/05/21 12:08 AM
5

Men on those subs are just deeply insecure honestly and unable to admit it and seek actual solutions or support. Notice how all the posts are from dating apps and from the same accounts. These men are on dating apps and clearly it isn't going well for them. So they post profiles of women they deem lesser online to make themselves feel better about their own lack of game. Nice guys is making fun of guys who call themselves "nice guys" but are ...not nice. Like "fck you ugly b***" if you reject th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 11:53 PM
38

Oh I just commented this elsewhere but I thought I would share here. I just discovered the cesspit that is "where have all the good men gone" Literally just posts of single moms' dating profiles and making fun of them if they say a single thing that suggests they have standards or even if they don't. Lots of resentment for women who have had sex ever. I think the single mom hate partially comes from jealousy that the woman had sex. (I put the wrong sub name in by accident but changed it) Oh also…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 10:37 AM
33

There's a whole sub that was intended (apparently) to be a "response" to the nice guys sub..."where have all the good men gone" and it's just men posting pictures of single and overweight women's dating profiles and making fun of them. Heinous.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 10:31 AM
9

Fellow "intimidating lady" here! And I'm not even 5 feet tall 😂 I like to say (to myself, in the shower later when it comes to me) "am I intimidating or are you intimidated by me?"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 12:38 AM
4

I'm not ready to go that deep but when I am I will make a post like this about myself and the things I did as a sad, desperate, self-loathing bottom-feeding pickme. One thing I will add that isn't so bad but kinda funny. I live in a sprawling city and the number of times I have travelled 5+ miles to go on a date that was blocks from the dude's house (guess how I learned that?) One time I did this and the guy said he had driven there and it turned out he lived two blocks away lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/05/21 12:03 AM
76

One time in HS I was crying my guts out in the bathroom over god knows what and when I came out there was a little post-it note for me, it said "cheer up! you are loved" or something short and sweet like that. I don't know why but it helped. I felt seen and heard. Less alone. Even though it was a stranger who left it and I never found out who
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/05/21 11:52 PM
60

The worst is that I honestly never cared. I was looking for personality. I dated some dudes who were honestly ugly and/or very short (I'm super short so it didn't matter to me). And they were the worst to me. Projecting their insecurities onto me day and night. The absolute worst were overweight men, and none got past a few dates because they would inevitably make a comment about MY figure or start textbook negging. Like clockwork. They all lured me in via conveniently outdated photos on tinder …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 06:03 PM
42

The love-bombing thing made me SHRIEK. that's so on point. Same as men who get in shape...exactly once. Because they can't sustain it. But they'll talk about those glory days forever.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:49 PM
41

Legit, millennial men are the first generation to GROW UP with on-demand access to free porn wherever, whenever. From like, very early childhood. I first saw porn when I was 8. Ladies the result of this grand experiment are in. They are the men in their 20s and 30s right now.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:46 PM
10

I saw this post you reference. I actually get non-creepy compliments from random men all the time. Usually like "cool bike" or compliments on some hobby thing. Even "nice haircut" I get sometimes. It's generally in passing and I say thanks and we move on with our lives. They feel good for giving a compliment, I feel good for receiving one, it's how things should be. That's in contrast with (this doesn't happen to me much but I've seen it happen to others) cat-calling, compliments followed by agg…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/05/21 01:24 PM
9

Yes! That was clearly the best choice for her but it was just such an awful situation all around. Her husband really just DIPPED!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 07:23 PM
6

You know the fact that it's a REQUIREMENT means historically this has been a huge issue too! Good God
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 03:31 PM
56

For me it's a really specific thing. It's the fear of having an undetected extremely disabled child and having no support in caring for it. Because this happens. Married women have a planned expected baby and it's born and diagnosed with a severe disability. It will require very special full-time care it's entire life. The dad immediately LEAVES and says he wants nothing to do with the baby. It's just mom now. There is no government support for something like that. There just isn't. There is som…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 01:16 PM
19

Men in science can get so far with no communication skills. It's generally forgiven if they are deemed "smart." You see a lot of medium-functioning autistic men high up in academia but few women. I've seen fully tenured adult male professors act like buffoons. Defensive tantrums (kavanaugh style), interrupting and talking over others, bullying STUDENTS publicly or on TWITTER, having complete eruptions of anger in the middle of the lab, like...it's pretty unreal. You'll never see a woman do that …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 01:05 PM
17

I can't wait until no one uses the word STEM anymore. That's not a crack at OP but rather the way the distinction basically exists to artificially make experts in a select set of fields feel superior. It's not a coincidence that the STEM fields were traditionally male-dominated. Who do you think made the distinction. And now that women are dominating increasingly more STEM fields...suddenly there's a new term to distinguish "man STEM" and "woman STEM." AKA the "hard vs soft" sciences. I would be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 12:49 PM
54

Yep. Even if she was truly diagnosed clinically insane. If she were severely mentally ill, schizophrenic, BPD, had major crisis or episode that affected her behavior, any other condition that might be classified as "crazy" ...a HVM still wouldn't talk about her like that. A HVM would never say, to his next partner, "my ex was crazy" that's so damn disrespectful and dismissive of someone's real involuntary illness. It's always a red flag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 12:40 PM
710

Schrodinger's Misogyny: Men are simultaneously the superior, logical sex and dumb as a fucking rock
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/05/21 12:15 AM
9

Hurray, extremely incorrect interpretations of science! Y'all this is the full article 🤣 https://relationship-institute.com/differences-between-men-and-women/
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 11:08 PM
22

It's so much easier for men to be in shape. Full stop.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 11:04 PM
68

hey what the FUCK
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 10:35 PM
12

Ugh yep all of that. I feel the same way - that I had no innocent, fun growing up and "first love" experiences. Right from the get-go of puberty it was all porn sickness around me. And I just had no idea that's what it was until more than a decade later. This is tangential (and also potentially triggering so TW) but I think about this a lot - how children growing up with internet porn is so new and kids of our generation could be the first life-long porn addicts. The first kids raised on porn. N…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 10:15 PM
40

Yeppp. Looking back at this particular former child, I feel like he was addicted to porn as a kid and probably one of the first to like...grow up addicted to porn. And it resulted in a lot of children being subjected to his (and his friends, but he was the most depraved) coercion and ultimately, for many, assault I remember we used to chat on AIM (this was like 2005) before we "dated" in middle school and he told me all these...things about sex. Like his penis size, that he measured, and he info…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 06:21 PM
67

Yeah honestly since discovering red pill like this year it is my biggest fear that I will mistake red pill indoctrination for legit attempts at self-improvement. Saved this post
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:11 PM
190

Read it to the end and those "if he says this he's into RP" bullets are all shit my MIDDLE SCHOOL BOYFRIEND said to coerce me into having sex with him when we were 13
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:09 PM
3

I woulda bet so much money on that fact!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 11:58 AM
58

I'm going to make a few calls and see if we can just shut it down entirely until we figure out what the fuck is going on Like this is so fucking serious. There are grown adults who don't wipe and women who don't consider that a deal-breaker
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/05/21 12:04 AM
29

Yeah I haven't had anyone do that to me since middle school and every single boy who did that ended up being a serial abuser with some military/police job If an adult did this to me I would run at the first "K" it's so fucking unstable
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 09:39 PM
29

They sometimes eat their cubs. Or other cubs. But so do a lot of animals.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 05:11 PM
16

Misidentifying brand names (cars, clothes, etc) on purpose is a fun, petty trigger for a lot of people and if an older man says something creepy about my "motherly instincts" I look to use this. "Oh hey, my dad has that same watch, I got it for him at Marshall's" when he has a Rolex "I've been thinking about a new car, how do you like your Camry...I'm on a budget" when he has a Tesla or some shit (Obligatory I don't know if either of those brands are a burn, but those are legit things my dad has…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 12:18 PM
10

The ex thing...I have a story! So yeah I dated a guy who met all OP's bullet points to a T, including keeping 2 of his exes around for emotional support and lowkey being residually obsessed with his high school ex (🤢) One of his "emotional support exes" was another ex from high school (so he had two he kept around plus a third from college) and he claimed she had been "abusive." So I asked why he still talked to her. His response I will try to quote as close as possible to what he said: "she sav…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/05/21 11:13 AM
3

I suspect this too. I don't really understand anything about the disorder or what was up with me as a baby. But when I was told I had it as a young kid it was explained as a lack of empathy and understanding social cues, and then that "curious incident of the dog in the nighttime" book was dropped in my lap. But I suspect you're right.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 05:59 PM
14

This scenario is exactly what I am writing about here...in fact it's the mother's day thing. I had to edit my post to be less specific because it was legit about how I was chastised for doing less than expected for mother's day while my dad and bro did nothing, with the excuse of "well men just don't get that stuff"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 05:58 PM
4

Yep. And im not saying I think it's okay but it's the truth.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 05:56 PM
71

Agreed. I was diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome as a baby. Parents put me into all sorts of ABA, controversial therapies aimed at making me "normal" and teaching me about social cues, empathy, etc. We can never know if it was those experiences which made a difference or if I had empathy and the ability to read social cues all along but I have those now despite basically being diagnosed as...not having those. Idk my point of telling that. It's just an anecdote. But I strongly believe children ca…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 01:12 PM
11

It...it might have been
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 12:25 PM
32

So much to unpack here but the occupation ended me, I am now deceased. Why Kansas City 🤣🤣🤣 and why do I think his choice of location was somehow motivated by police depts rampant with racism and brutality...he just gives me that vibe
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 11:56 AM
250

So much cognitive dissonance and hypocrisy in all of this situation. I just want to jot down a few things... we here at FDS don't just go around sucking anyone's dicks and the fact that the assumption is we do....says a lot more about these individuals than us. I would never suck a strangers dick. Men are dirty and can carry disease. Wouldn't even do it for 500 dollars. And if you're so desperate for cash you are sucking dick for money that is a situation I would want to help you out of...not su…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/05/21 11:42 AM
226

It's so fucking funny how men fall apart when this sub comments on mens appearances. Sad boy lurkers...don't like it? Y'all started it and it's not a "double standard" if we treat you the way you treat us. We know y'all are never gonna stop cause y'all don't even think it's wrong. So we are literally ELIMINATING the double standard where the world thinks it's okay to talk about a woman of any age like a sex doll, criticize women's areola and labia sizes, etc yet poking fun at teensy peepees is c…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 12:34 PM
12

In grade school everything is done for them. They are driven and dropped off in band, soccer practice, etc. Mum then takes them to tutoring. They don't choose hobbies or become successful from their own drive. It's all just...happening to them passively. Then they graduate and naturally lack the drive to maintain their hobbies. Full grown men really look back at grade school as the peak of their life. Every time a guy says "I was so smart in grade school, I got good grades without even trying" t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 11:16 AM
43

This guy in my hometown lost his virginity at a party and everyone could hear him yelling "I AM MAN! I AM BEAST!" the whole damn time. Age 17 or 18. I never met the girl but my condolences were sent
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 11:08 AM
19

Ha! I went through a couple tinder phases in my old city. I remember the second time around they had introduced "super likes" and I swiped through, and all these men I had turned down previously super liked me. Including one dude who had tried to sexually assault me Like...how sad. I'm not a major catch and our dates had been bland and they were like oooo lemme try this one again now that I'm bald and 50 lbs heavier
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 11:04 AM
4

Yeah, there have been a lot of things that have clued me into this. It's a bummer but a good lesson. I think I just need to meet people outside of work. Lol.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/05/21 10:54 AM
169

scrolling through porn sites looking for a labia that looks exactly like mine like what
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 08:04 PM
63

Lol I came to say this! Somehow I feel like he wants someone with long flowing hair and eyelashes but hair nowhere else 😂
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 08:01 PM
15

It's just insane how much of a switch occurred when she got pregnant! Like, I've known these two for awhile and always thought they were a mutually-respectful couple, one I would even look to as an example. And then one day this guy just drops at work: "I'm gonna be a dad!" Not "we're having a baby, a HUMAN" he made it all about him. I'm hoping this is just a bunch of nerves and adrenaline and it wears off but damn it messes with me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 07:18 PM
36

I don't have an answer but same question about Jack Black
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 05:09 PM
38

I get really down about how people act and especially how the men in my life are by and large LVM. My therapist tells me to think of a man who is a good man, not an LVM, to remind myself they aren't all like that. I had a person in mind. That person got his girlfriend pregnant and is outing himself as such an LVM and it's breaking my everything. Especially cause its my colleague and one of the few people I see regularly. He won't marry her. He's making her pay for the baby with medicaid. She's b…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 04:55 PM
122

I saw a tweet a few months ago by a Black women and all it said was "Black men and white women, do better in your allyship" and some of the replies were so fucking scary. The top reply was basically "this is disrespectful to George Floyd" which ...what? But most were just horrendously sexist and racist. Basically proving her point again and again and again I hope the woman who posted that is doing okay. She's an absolute queen and one of the few people I actually enjoyed following and learned fr…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 12:42 PM
15

I once hung out with a guy who was so addicted to gaming that without even realizing it, mid conversation, he would open up his computer and start playing Probably the least attractive thing I've ever seen. I'd rather date someone addicted to anything else. This guy was addicted to a children's activity.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 11:42 AM
85

As we like to say...if he wanted to he would. If he wanted to save the world or really fix a goddamn thing he would. He could end homelessness and world hunger tomorrow but he doesn't wanna do that
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 11:29 AM
114

We LOVE. TO. SEE IT.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/05/21 12:29 AM
131

Why do I have a separate trauma relevant to every single post? Tw sexual assault of a minor Anyways, in high school I was "hanging out" with an older guy and he coerced my to have sex with him a day after he had drunkenly done the same but settled for thrusting in some random crease of my body. Sober, he found the right location. I got my period and just...dumped blood. Idk what caused what. He had a big dick and was bad at using it and went way too hard. But I wasn't a virgin at the time. And t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 04:24 PM
42

I have recovered and decided I am ultimately grateful for this information. Thank you for your service
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:41 AM
18

I've posted a handful of times and I would get angry DMs and down-votes IMMEDIATELY after posting before I disabled DMs. Also "reddit cares" lol They sit and refresh the "new" tab 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:10 AM
13

I needed to read this post. I have never dated anyone as fit OR educated as me. And even now (not dating but imagining if I did) I feel like I have to sacrifice one of those things. Nah! I did both, why is it unreasonable to seek someone who did as well?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/05/21 12:05 AM
109

I read the "counter-arguments" saying this proves nothing because the assay measures bacteria not actual poop, but like...every woman here know exactly how men get shit in their beards
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 11:56 PM
63

No No no no Why did I read this? If any man had shit in their beards it was the guys I've dated with beards oh NO OH NO Ummmmm I'm editing this as I learn more cause I'm just not ok...I looked up "beards contain" and the top results were all words for poop. Ummmmmmmmmm help
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 11:35 PM
6

If he's talking about his mental health issues but doing absolutely nothing to manage them, yeah. This. Especially if he only brings it up when you call out his bad behavior. Mental health issues are a reason, but not an excuse for bad behavior. I can understand why he does a thing but it doesn't mean I have to tolerate it or associate with him. It doesn't mean he gets a free pass.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy08/05/21 04:53 PM
25

This is one of my biggest faults. I do this every time. My imagination is out of control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 10:58 PM
2

Also like yeah I would also radiate positive energy if my full time job was travelling wherever I want on someone else's dime without ever having to think about money or responsibilities
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:47 PM
3

Lol I have corrected men on spewing pseudoscience or just straight lies about biology and they legit respond "well that's my opinion" like....yeah that's where we are at nowadays.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:37 PM
9

Oh yeah absolutely. I have noticed this in bio too. Nowadays if it's not "computational" it is considered "soft" in some circles. The "soft vs hard" science thing in my humblest opinion is a response to STEM losing its "elite boys club" status. Boys in STEM needed another distinction to feel manly and exclusive. I also think the "hard vs soft" corresponds to how well the subject is explained/taught rather than how complex or "difficult" the concepts are...and I think men tend to be worse at expl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 08:33 PM
15

Yeah, this is unfortunately what I have seen as well :(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/05/21 12:50 AM
58

That part of the video gave me the worst chills I have ever had I had the same immediate thought. Yep, he absolutely beats her and probably will after this video. (Not that I wasn't suspecting that already but the 'bro' pushed me to the point where I would bet money on it)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 09:47 PM
195

Life sciences fields (biology, medicine) are rapidly becoming majority-female if they haven't already (medicine has). As an undergrad many years ago it wasn't uncommon to be in a class of all women in more high-level courses. One of my many lab gigs was at an ivy league and my boss was a rather pompous professor who taught a very "exclusive seminar course" for freshmen (this is all what he told me so...who knows what is true) and he told me he rarely has male freshmen who get into the course. Be…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 09:40 PM
36

I have a weird fascination with this phenomenon. Talking so much and yet saying nothing. I knew some wealthy kids who went on to become "digital nomads" aka travelling the world on trust fund money and blogging about it. But at the same time they need to be "entrepreneurs" so they claim to sell a service of sorts, but it's unclear what the service is. Sometimes it's "coaching" or a "premium subscription" to their "brand" but they sell nothing physical, have no unique insights...just talk about h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 05:53 PM
40

One difference is that alcoholism inevitably kills you if you don't get sober. It has slow but devastating effects on the entire body. Severe alcoholics can have liver disease, heart problems, korsakoff's syndrome (amnesia), vitamin deficiencies, blindness, so much more. It's just easier to see the effects of alcoholism. With porn addiction the effects are always in the pants or the bedroom so most of the world doesn't see (unless they are tuned to the behavioral characteristics) Fun facts about…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 05:21 PM
2

When men are the sole financial provider in a relationship there is usually a reason : because the partner is in a full-time unpaid role (housekeeper, caretaker, etc). That traditional arrangement is the way it is because of the expectation that women do those unpaid jobs and thus don't have the time to work a paid job. Because those unpaid jobs are actual jobs in that they take up all their time and energy. People will say - what about early on, before they get married/buy a house/have kids? Wh…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 02:21 PM
52

If this is referring to the video I am thinking of...didnt this take place in an airport??? Like, clearly past security? "If you don't want guys taking photos of your butt without consent just bring a gun" to the terminal of an airport? How? If I pulled out a gun every time a guy did this to me I would be shot dead by police years ago
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 01:11 PM
4

What women bring to the table is historically devalued. And that's why this question is hard for you to answer. Examples: Emotional labor. women have BABIES. THEY MAKE PEOPLE WITH THEIR BODY AND FEED THEM. women by and large do more "organizational," "volunteer," etc tasks within a workplace. Who plans the parties, takes notes, participates in the DEI committee or really any committee, etc? (In academia where I work, this is a major trend - committees, volunteer positions are always majority or …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 01:07 PM
11

Yep, I think adults don't really get that kids who grew up with internet porn started watching at like age 8! That's when my siblings started. The worst of it, and I'm so so sorry it happened to you, is when boys rape their siblings. I don't even know what to say.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 12:39 PM
11

Yep. Yep yep yep. Same. Even today when I try to talk to my mom about what the neighborhood boys did to me when I was a kid, the response is generally "you were both kids who didn't know what you were doing!" the boys were just too young to resist their urges and somehow I bear responsibility for letting them do it. I was 12 when this all started. I didn't even know what was happening. In my hometown at least, we have an epidemic of "boy moms" who think their baby boy is capable of no harm. And …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 12:35 PM
3

Btw click the link to see the article (the photo is not my point of posting)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 12:31 PM
3

This isn't my article. I didn't write it. I shared it here mainly for the topic of vaccine coercion
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/05/21 12:30 PM
66

This is nit-picky but it drives me mad when folks think liberal is the end of the spectrum, the leftmost option. It shows they don't know a damn thing past what they learned in high school and ironically is a classic example of colonial thinking. Liberal means you still support capitalism. In high school in the US they tell you there are two options: liberal and conservative, aka democrat and republican. You maybe learn about socialism and communism but of course in the context of the cold war u…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 09:15 PM
22

It's a pretty complex topic that I'm no expert in and still actively learning about but I can give it a shot. The short answer to your last sentence is yes. But the "symptoms" are not one and the same as those of white supremacy or misogyny although there is some overlap of course. Some examples, highly specific to the US: taking your public school education as rigid fact without realizing that history is written by winners (colonists) vs seeking out multiple perspectives and remaining skeptical…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:58 PM
9

Also kinda sad if that's the thing that will make her brag to her friends...her standards are so low. I've been there. I hope she finds this sub
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:43 PM
11

I realized maybe I haven't told this absolute gem of a LVM tale on here This dude told me that I don't have a clit. He very confidently informed me of this after he tried very hard to find it. He said he looked everywhere. No clit. Like, this really happened to me. I believe we were both 20. For the record, I'm very familiar with my clitoris. Edit: NO WAY I just remembered THIS ISN'T THE ONLY TIME. Cause godddd I have so many LVM "gems" ...another guy did find my clit but he thought it was my ur…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:38 PM
123

The way they just casually mention 15-19 year old rapists When are we going to really talk about how many boys are rapists starting as children?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 08:32 PM
6

LOL!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 07:18 PM
11

I think women have more resilience than men and thus are better equiped to deal with pain. And I strongly suspect that's due to social conditioning and the fact that we have periods - a monthly, unavoidable source of pain that all must learn to cope with somehow. But "pain threshold" is so variable (and actually nearly impossible to measure/compare) that I wouldn't make this claim and I think making such a generalization can be dangerous - evidenced by women's pain being dismissed in the clinic …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 04:19 PM
63

Ha! I have a good one. MANLY/UNFEMININE this is how men try to insult me and accidentally admit they are jealous of me 😇
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 04:14 PM
44

Same vibes as adults who buy boy toddlers onesies with shit like "ladies man" and other hyper masculine phrases...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 10:46 AM
15

Some of the pet subreddits require a certain amount of karma to post. You'll get a DM if they actually ban you methinks
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/05/21 10:33 AM
2

Men: watch and pay for SO MUCH of this exact content that they literally develop severe addictions Reddit: this is normal Woman: sells nudes Men: I just can't take it :'(
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:40 PM
52

I am highly educated in the life sciences. My last ex used to cut in and talk over me when I talked about anything within my expertise, even my own research, to mansplain it himself. I called him out and his response/justification was "I just know a lot of facts, ok? That's kind of my thing." Literally everyone knows facts dude
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 05:59 PM
194

He took an annual vacation with his ex while he was married! There was another thread about this yesterday that I commented on (see my comment history) and a lot of people were pointing out the various evils he has funded, etc Another thought: he's one of the richest men in the world. if he wanted to end homelessness, he would. If he wanted to end poverty, he would. If he wanted to end food insecurity he would. He has not.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 05:48 PM
20

If he doesn't understand how to google, he isn't going to understand basic health and biology. Lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 05:12 PM
60

unbeliabavle! yuo just canrt undeesdn my Logick and Reeson!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 05:08 PM
22

True I definitely agree musk is like a million times worse but the people that idol-worship either of them seem to be...the same type of person, or at least on the same spectrum of terrible Musk isn't getting a vaccine? Jfc, I bet he's lying
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 02:29 PM
24

Tbf I personally find porn revolting. I've watched more than 1 clip. Really tried to get into it when I was younger (my female friends were all "sex positive" ie libfems and bragged about watchihg porn) but it just had no appeal for me. It's all fake, campy, and there's way too much saliva which I don't particularly want to LOOK AT you know?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:51 AM
97

Lol I've been calling this for years. He's not a good guy. I remember how guys used to simp for gates like they do for musk. Immediate red flag.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:26 AM
52

Different phone case and shorts but same low level walk of life. Maybe they are siblings (or somehow the same guy who just changed his phone case)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:21 AM
176

I got a few to add to the pile. being a vegetarian or vegan (even if he is too) being more fit than he is sobriety doing typical "basic girl stuff" and not feeling ashamed tuning out/looking bored when he's talking flat out ignoring when he's talking high. Heels.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 11:02 AM
45

I used to do this and yeah can confirm. Cause it takes a ton of time, money, and effort to plan a trip! Add in - if you're travelling solo as a lady you're not afraid of men and you're telling people that. Men would try to overexaggerate the "safety concerns" and I'd be like yeah I think I'll be okay in BELGIUM lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:57 AM
5

Yeah. My parents are good people but entirely incompatible. My dad is on the spectrum and doesn't express affection well. My mom hates this and loudly resents him. They don't talk or communicate. My mom has complained to me about his sexual performance before. But they are still married. It's a horrible example. You can read my comment history and see how well I turned out. and im doing better than my siblings. I literally had no idea what a healthy relationship looked like and I barely do now. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 10:53 AM
27

There definitely ARE men who get weirdly jealous, but these particular folks acted the same way before quarantine (and before I had really visible muscles). Some guys do get jealous and try to mansplain fitness to me in some attempt to be like "nuh UH i need to have superiority in this subject!" Who knows, maybe when I fully re-enter society I will encounter more of that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/05/21 12:21 AM
78

I'm rather boyish looking and very fit (muscular), and thus the majority of men are not attracted to me. There is always a small % of men who act like I don't even exist because they don't find me attractive. They won't engage in conversation, look at me, introduce themselves. sometimes they'll be blatantly rude or mean. In my vast network of "acquaintances" (basically people I see regularly in pre-covid times) there are some I know just will not talk to me or acknowledge me and that's cool, I i…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 09:24 PM
12

If it's a deal-breaker it's a deal-breaker. There is no wrong reason to not date someone. It's your personal preference, your life, your future. I'm an active weed smoker. I rarely talk about it on here cause I know it's not my best quality but it helps me cope with anxiety and PMDD and i'm just not in a good place to quit right now. Someday I will. But I think I can say from the other side...relationships between weed-smokers and non-weed-smokers are rarely ideal. It's just an incompatibility. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 09:16 PM
7

I just need to vent, as usual... I'm just at my wits end with the terminal laziness of people in my life. Surprise, it's mostly men. I still see limited people because of covid but have a few male colleagues and a male roommate who I see regularly. I've watched them turn into the laziest people over the past year while I've been working out like crazy, trying to level up. Something about constantly being around people with zero drive just kills me and I don't know why. Almost like I am jealous. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 09:00 PM
2

It is such a great musical, despite the pickme decisions...I like to think of it as a cautionary tale. Gonna listen to the soundtrack today! It's soo good
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/05/21 11:53 AM
2

Tw sexual assault I've talked about the "neighborhood boys'" on here a bit. But one of them did this. I was 19, home from college for a few weeks and had a terrible relationship with my mum. One night I didn't feel safe and needed a place to stay. This boy in the neighborhood is who I contacted because he happened to be home at the time and he lived super nearby. I made it extremely clear in the texts that I didn't want to do anything sexual. And he knew what my mom was like. And I was in extrem…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 11:07 PM
50

The straight men in my life (not many, most are colleagues so a limited sample) have really let themselves go during quarantine. I feel bad talking about it because well, it was a hard time. But I've noticed it. I did gain some weight, had some rough patches, picked up some bad habits etc...what I'm saying is I didn't come out of quarantine perfect and unscathed. But I made an effort to lose the weight by this time knowing I'd be immune, and generally get my shit together to be presentable and m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 10:37 PM
6

Reading the comments - this sounds like Once on This Island, an old musical with a fun soundtrack and this plot pretty much. Wonder if they are connected
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 10:25 PM
141

Seriously (as a pickme) I kept a FWB around once for 2 reasons only: he had a cyclists body and was the ONLY person who could guarantee an orgasm every time. Dude was broke, not super conventially attractive, worked at a bike shop part time. That was IT. And the vast, vast majority of men cannot do these 2 things - maintain an active hobby and make a woman orgasm. Male lurkers you really, really don't have to do much for at least someone to give you a chance.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:55 PM
166

So on point. Incels are a walking self-fulfilling prophecy. Everything that "culture" (wastepit, sewage facility, infected abscess, idk) is and does is fundamentally a turn off to women yet all they do is whine about how no one wants them (which itself is among the top turnoffs)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:17 PM
400

They think sex comes without effort. Like in porn. Cause their only knowledge of sex comes from porn. Did incels exist before porn? Obv not the name but I wonder if the same mentality was around 40+ years ago. Men sitting around doing nothing wondering why no one is sucking their dick right now
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 02:00 PM
40

I want to know stats on how many men die a year from their own feigning incompetence.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 01:03 PM
41

Soooo yeah this is how some of my family members are. Like, growing up this was how my own fucking mother and brother acted. One of the symptoms of their kind of boundary-crossing mom-son bond (he was the only son). The way this behavior was normalized vs the way my sister and I were ridiculed, mocked, insulted for going vegan and vegetarian. The way my parents would sneak meat into our food. Eating healthy bad but baby boy having a tantrum at 16 because a carrot touched his chicken is a-okay
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/05/21 01:01 PM
108

Yep. Same situation and have had the same type of friends. Looking back I call them pickme. Back in college I had a little friend group that had a mix of conventionally and unconventionally attractive ladies. Once we all went to a party and one of us overhead one of the hosts calling one of our friends fat and some slurs. We left immediately and stole alcohol on the way out. I don't understand how anyone is okay with watching someone treat their friends like shit. Boils my blood.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 11:33 PM
11

Skinnier than me. I'm pretty teensy but I work out a lot and have some muscle. It's important that whoever I date is at least moderately active. If he's skinnier than ME he is really not trying and I don't want to feel his hip bones cut into me when we do it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 07:20 PM
14

Yeah the part where he replied that "he didn't care" who the third person was, was probably the real breaking point. Also that he said "it's something I really want to experience" like it's on his bucket list and therefore something he plans to pursue in his lifetime, despite being married to someone who doesn't want that...yeah. and of course with these types, you know there were other red flags before this. He told on himself and it led her to connecting the dots.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:33 PM
9

He clearly just goes up to random women at the bar and does exactly this as they are leaving the restroom or some shit
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/05/21 03:26 PM
30

Honestly worse than if they advertised a blatant pyramid scheme like Vector Marketing or Lularoe with the same strategy. At least in those jobs, your customers aren't mostly/exclusively predators. Do we have #s on the average monthly income from OF creators? I swear I have seen it here but might be thinking of a post about an MLM or something
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 09:00 PM
4

Hey, just wanted to say...same. it's hard. Especially with things opening up again, I'm feeling so alone while my "friends" are hitting brunch, bars, etc again. I stopped drinking awhile back and a lot of my friends just lost interest in me because I don't do the only thing they enjoy. Alcohol is such a fundamental part of life in my field. We are here for you, and we are your friends even from afar!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 05:40 PM
56

All of these except 3 were tactics of my last ex. 6 in particular....damn! Homeboy was a "tech bro who worked 80 hours a week" (note: that just means he had no boundaries with work and life, not that he actually worked that much) so literally any time I brought up an issue I was "impacting his work" which was oh so important. So many moons out of that relationship and I've still internalized the way he made me feel awful for reacting to his disrespect. I have seen 3 tho in others! Really horribl…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/04/21 11:42 AM
31

On the fucking internet too with way more detail than any of us wanted or asked for
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 10:33 PM
31

LVM love the idea of women going on dates for free food and nothing more because that means they never have to consider what they themselves did or are that causes no woman to ever accept or pursue a second date with them.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 10:30 PM
88

I don't like men sweating and mouth-breathing on me during sex. Men also store fat differently than women. So if a man is visibly out of shape, he's doing way worse on the inside than the outside. Don't date a guy who is gonna die at 45.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 08:18 PM
38

Yeah this is honestly borderline abuse imo. Continued contact after you told him not to and/or blocked him. Absolutely, exclusively an attempt at retaining control.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 08:12 PM
14

Thanks! I like to think I am. I do think of writing some sort of...book? Article? Manifesto? Something like that, aimed at moms of boys. To say this is what happens when you believe your precious baby boy is capable of no harm.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 04:45 PM
29

Yep. I remember the last time an LVM tried to project the "you're a woman so naturally a mom/need to have babies" bullshit at me. I was joking about how I spoil my cat. His natural, totally not creepy response was "those are your mothering instincts showing through" or something like that, but way creepier and also in the context of a group chat. I turned the tables on him and he revealed, having just the day before decided to "start a business from home" (I'm not kidding! He had just decided th…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 03:29 PM
24

They would say "no one I know would ever be raped because they're better than that!" That's how parents talk about their sons who rape ("my precious baby boy would never!") and daughters who are raped ("but my innocent virgin baby would never do something so dirty! She always dresses so proper" etc etc). To those who blissfully ignore the problem, rape is something that happens to other "lesser" people.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:49 PM
36

To that last paragraph I would take it even further. When he assumes your brain/body can and wants to produce children, make a ridiculous assumption about him right back. "How are you recovering from your vasectomy?" Him: "...huh?" "Oh I just assumed you had a vasectomy. You know, since you don't really seem like the type to have children. Men, right?" I'm evil today. Someone stop me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:45 PM
216

When men try to tell other women to make babies it is always projection. They're the ones with the biological clock that is tick tick ticking in their twenties. Because to them, kids are a status symbol, not like...real people or responsibility. They see their peers having kids and they want them too. Plain and simple. Women know we can have and raise children anytime with or without men. Men are the only ones who need another person to do that for them. And if they are doing it for status (whic…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 01:02 PM
100

Like a lot of women I was "collateral damage" in the neighborhood boys' journey to learn how to control their sexual urges as kids. First incident happened when I was 12. It was my "boyfriend" but y'all, we were 12. He made me touch his penis and I cried. And then he just kept pushing my boundaries from there. Same kid violated me multiple times between the ages of 12 and 21. There was just nothing I could do about it I would guess many if not most rapes, especially most unreported rapes, occur …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/04/21 11:50 AM
40

wow WOW thank you for taking the time to elaborate! I am glad he is not a person in your life anymore and I may need to sip a cup or two of bleach I just...I yeah. Can totally relate to many aspects of this story but a guy jizzing his pants is new for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 10:41 PM
120

I have some questions. The pants jizzing...how, where, when, why? When in the timeline do the following events occur: first pants jizzing, second pants jizzing, disclosure of this "hack" ? Lastly but importantly what the fuck?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 08:16 PM
37

Hot damn. I'm a little lady, and a recovering alcoholic . This was my exact routine when I was drinking (years ago) down to the quantities and everything. A 6 pack of IPA sounds about right but I could drink WAY more. I would pass out on the couch too. Never pissed myself or threw up though. Jeez. I say loud and clear: do not date an active addict. They have to recover first, on their own. It was not until I stopped drinking that I realized just how bad things had been. My health, body, mind...e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 08:09 PM
74

Kind of wondering if we have the same ex friend cause I'm in a similar situation. I haven't talked to this person in years but suddenly she started calling, leaving voicemails (never explaining why). We kinda just lost contact when she started dating this guy and basically abandoned all her goals to be his full time cheerleader. I did some social media digging and it's fairly obvious what happened. She's looking back and realizing she has no one to be in her wedding party. She wasn't a great fri…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 07:57 PM
21

Wow, this hit me hard. Same way I feel when I go into the sub I think it is from. There is something so tragic about this You can see they "have it all" from the outside. House, kids, dog, car...that life that so many people blindly dream of. I've been there. And I still feel it a bit when I see my peers getting married and starting families. But this is what is behind so many of those stories and happy smiling Facebook photos. You know it all sounded good on paper, but they're x years in now an…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/04/21 12:43 AM
12

Lmao. Imagine...people blaming women for declining birth rates when it's actually young men destroying their own reproductive systems.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 10:33 PM
29

I was recently "diagnosed" (not really) by my psychiatrist as an "empath." Sounds like some hoity toity title like Indigo Child or Savant but it literally just means...a person who has empathy. This was in reference to how I am very affected when terrible things happen to those around me even if they don't affect me directly. You know, a totally rare and unusual affliction. Every day I question more and more...maybe we really are the "others," those of us with empathy. Then I realized we're not,…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 09:50 PM
6

I had to look around for the term for it. I knew of the condition and have read about it online before (mostly here) - took me awhile to find a name for it. I should go back and edit and link some of the sources I found. Others have pointed out it can be caused by other things too, including sex. I also doubt many men who have this condition tell the truth to their doctor about what caused it.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 09:11 PM
17

Ohhhh boy. Fortunately the guy in this story actually told me why his dick was like that. Not directly but he kind of made a joke about it offhand - I don't exactly remember. But he was the first and only to actually call himself a porn addict. Porn addiction wasn't even on my radar as a concept and I honestly didn't even care about his bent dick (his other porn-related issues however, I did). Years later, looking back...he had it BAD. Probably one of the worst cases of porn addiction to occur e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 09:07 PM
13

I didn't even consider this. Accordingly, my day is ruined.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 06:30 PM
10

I think the giveaway is the porn addiction unfortunately - that we have to vet for regardless. It can also be a clue if it bends perfectly parallel to the grip he would have while jerking off - 45 degrees in the opposite direction of the dominant hand. I've never seen a naturally curved penis but the one I'm describing in my post was exactly 45 degrees to the left. If I uh...pretend to jerk myself off for some time, the plane of the grip I settle on is in line with the curve in his dick.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 05:48 PM
101

Read my comment history. I'm a recovering addict myself. Take a seat. Edit: wrote a longer answer for ye To answer you slowly. Substance abuse is a reason, not an excuse, for bad behavior. Regardless of why you did the drugs, your trauma...those were your actions. I don't have to elaborate on this. We are all accountable for our behavior. Porn addiction isn't in the DSM because the DSM was written by men and also porn addiction is very new (read my post). The DSM is always changing and is not ab…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 03:23 PM
40

Straight up false. Meth does incredible damage to the body. Hence why the term "meth teeth" only applies to meth users when there are many more people who live in poverty and lack access to dental care who do not have meth teeth. Even if you were correct...why would you date a poor meth user...that's like, the definition of someone not to date. Let them figure their shit out and get clean first and then maybe. but sheesh. My point stands.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 03:22 PM
35

Oh yeah, I think context matters here. I don't think you would see this without other red flags tbh because to get to this point he needs to be a pretty bad addict. More of a "if you're concerned he might be, it's something to consider" and also "this is what will happen to your porn addicted boyfriend so leave NOW" Kinda like meth teeth. Lots of things can cause teeth erosion...but when it's meth that kinda changes the situation
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 02:55 PM
27

I think you'd just have to vet for porn addiction. Given the uh...ergonomics? of how I have known men to jerk off...a perfect upward curve would seem unlikely to be caused by jerking off with one hand so much. Asymmetry is a clue. But surely this can be caused by other conditions and situations, and surely some men just have a natural slight curve. This is more of a concern if you're dating someone new who claims he "just watches a little porn sometimes" and you're suspecting he might be lying. …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 02:49 PM
352

I posted this and thought ...is this too far? And then remembered all the times I've seen women shamed for "having loose pussies" from sex, being "ruined" by childbirth or disease or general sex experience or turning 30, even having perfectly healthy and normal features like body hair, stomach fat, cellulite, etc...shit we don't choose, shit that is natural but still is shamed daily on this website. These bent dick bens do it to themselves and support child trafficking, rape, DV, and numerous ot…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 01:35 PM
212

Idk how but your comment made me so sad. I shouldn't feel bad for that guy I dated but I do. Cause this is his life. He really will never have an intimate relationship or healthy sex of any kind. All cause he got hooked on porn at 8 years old (his words!) He was cruel to me at the end and accused me of being asexual. He couldn't think of any other reason I didn't want to have sex with him. During our breakup he told on himself. "I thought I finally found a girl who enjoys sex but you were just l…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/04/21 12:58 PM
21

FDS has shown me that they are ALL THE SAME. it's unreal. I read every single story and I'm like yep! Just like Jack from my restaurant job, or something like that. Whatever the hell society is or was, or whatever happened these last 3 decades...it produced some real unfortunate men who all suck in the same ways. I don't really see any of what I described in women except maybe the frugal thing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 10:15 PM
44

Late 20s checking in. I...yes. all of it. What you wrote. Seen it and probably dated it as a pickme. Common themes: can cook, but way beneath the level of a normal adult. They need a recipe for everything, use every dish and bowl in the house, leaves a huge mess which they put off cleaning. No tricks, cleaning during down time, no skill. What they produce is always so simple. Pasta with sauce, stir fry, etc. And they act like they just cooked the greatest thing in the world, and then never do it…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/04/21 10:01 PM
76

I had a friend like this in college like this, except she would do that AND throw herself entirely at men and basically get them to fall for her. You know with 18-19 year old boys, it's not that hard to do and she was very good at it. The second any of them showed interest in one of her friends, she would do this. It only happened to me once and it wasn't a guy I was particularly interested in but the way she gave up a whole night to basically wrap him around her finger and then go on for days a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 02:14 PM
7

Men literally have been putting women in categories since the beginning of time the 1:10 scale cute vs hot vs pretty "girlfriend/wife material" Etc
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/04/21 01:13 PM
62

I have one of those fitness watches that tracks all sorts of things, one being "stress" (unclear what this feature actually measures) - you could see a visible "dip" in the stress immediately when we broke up. Like - tiny spike the day of the break up and then immediately dropped and stayed low the following days and weeks. In the past, my skin usually cleared up too since I'm not sleeping on unwashed pillow cases.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 10:13 PM
19

Yes! My last ex was like this! Criticizing me for not spending enough time at work, not having enough "interesting" hobbies, "wasting time" on reddit and watching TV... ...projection. Plain and simple. I don't spend all my time at work because why would I? I garden. I cycle long distances. I work out, lift, climb, run. I do art and my art covers my walls. I do so much! He was the one who didn't do shit!! To him, a hobby has to be something you sell or are the best at. Homeboy literally gave up e…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 06:38 PM
166

oh my GOD I had no idea that sub existed. Time for some bingeing.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 04:27 PM
1128

The funniest shit ever to me is how this sub is set up to be completely man proof. I would not be able to handle being a mod here (you mods are serious goddesses) but I would probably pay money to be a fly in y'all's inboxes for an hour or two.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 03:25 PM
53

LEGIT. I work in academia. No academic is bringing shit to the table. You make under 50k a year until your forties and that's if you are lucky. In grad school it's more like 20k. So you'll see 40yo male postdocs in academia, making 40k a year and never leaving the lab meanwhile their wife not only takes care of the kids full time but also has to be the primary breadwinner cause Dr here can barely cover rent. Just peachy working with these postdocs and hearing them complain about how their wives …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 01:28 PM
12

Works out? Lol. If he worked out he could last longer than a minute.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 01:23 PM
212

Yep. There's no way this is real. There's a reason he's on that forum.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/04/21 01:04 PM
6

Two dates! Yeah in the past...I have been lucky with a few guys who out their lingering feelings for an ex on the FIRST date, which is an easy "absolutely not." It's pretty shocking that people do this and see no problem with it. Then ofc they make up stupid reasons (or in your case, assume people act without reason???) for why she didn't want to keep things going. I wonder if any of these dudes ever realize it's their own damn fault and actually do anything about it. If it's happening after age…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 08:55 PM
13

Yep! These guys I dated were certainly not acting right but I bear a lot of responsibility for literally allowing them to. Instead of leaving the dumbass I would develop a heavy resentment or obsession with the "other woman" and go full pickme. I really just thought this was how life would be for me and I just had to deal with it with any dude. Fuck that. Never again.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 06:13 PM
11

Wow that guy sounds like a real POS and I'm glad you are away from that dumpster fire. "Wifey" fuck no fuck fuck fuck no! I'm in pain at just the thought.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 06:10 PM
13

Honestly it is for me too now. And it's sad. I think we have all been able to have a healthy friendship with other sexes and it's sad that so many people just CAN'T. It took me way too long to understand that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 06:09 PM
124

Every single one of my exes had a female friend he crossed boundaries with. Every. Single. One. Usually an ex or a girl he clearly wanted to fuck but wasn't good enough for. So yeah, I'm a lot of people's "crazy ex" because very, very few people ever took my side on this. I was always being the crazy/controlling/jealous one. And I truly believed it. Did everything I could to cure my "jealousy problem."
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/04/21 02:37 PM
52

Yep, I have seen this so many times. Translation: the guy got fit exactly once in his life, likely through extreme dieting or unsustainable workout programs like "insanity" or crossfit. Unsurprisingly, he was unable to maintain that level of fitness for more than a few months and never tried to get in shape again. Puts the old photos on his tinder profile anyway to lure a fit woman in, and every damn time has an excuse. Depression, work is too stressful, etc. Oh, and I forgot to add he always ne…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 07:28 PM
94

You bring up one little issue and suddenly "I get it, I'm the worst, I can do nothing right..." like ...no I'm just asking you to clean your toilet before I come over
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 04:24 PM
14

Ok girl RUN! I cannot stress this enough! I know exactly what he's doing and I have seen it with my own eyes. For a lot of men (and women) 27 is a magic number, the age at which they always "planned" (expected, felt entitled) to be married and/or have kids by. They hit 27 and it doesn't happen, and they start panicking cause they absolutely cannot handle the thought of it not happening until (gasp) their thirties. I have seen it in multiple people. I dated a 26yo when I was 19 and got to watch h…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/04/21 12:57 PM
49

It's not the point of this post but I just wanna say - anyone who blames someone for another person's suicide should be cut out, blocked, deleted. Cause that is some toxic thinking. It is never anyone else's fault when a person commits suicide. That person is clearly unable to understand the concepts of personal responsibility and free will, and will probably act accordingly. If you look in my post history you can see my first post (and reason for finally making an account on reddit) was about a…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/04/21 11:18 AM
24

Hit dogs holler. If they see it as an attack on them, it probably is 💅🍵
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/04/21 12:49 AM
17

This is violent
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 01:18 PM
11

Has an ipad that he exclusively uses to look up a recipe from bon appetit maybe twice a year Uses every single dish in the house while making the one dish Somehow, every time, despite the iPad and elaborate preparation, something goes terribly wrong and he starts cursing and panicking
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/04/21 01:17 PM
1

I highly recommend people make their own lists like this cause damn it really was helpful!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 06:17 PM
3

The thing that was in my mind when I first posted about angry pooping was that youtube channel "wafflepwn" from like, 2010 where some kid filmed his spoiled teen brother having the most ridiculous tantrums. I could have sworn he shat in one of those videos but could not bring myself to rewatch to find out. But I remember the brother having some really complex actions during some of the freakouts. And like, taking off his shirt. When I get mad I feel like I lose control and could not plan or exec…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 06:13 PM
2

Yeah this is what I mean! I hear about it all the time, I know it definitely happens, but I fortunately don't have many personal examples of it happening in my own life. I posted elsewhere on here about an angry customer doing a "double decker" in the store bathroom but I fortunately did not witness the altercation. I just can't imagine being so mad that I make the decision to publicly defecate. Like that's just humiliating
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 06:09 PM
3

I talk about it a lot on here and in some other internet spaces cause I have nothing to lose by sharing it here and maybe it will help someone. There's this stigma in society that once you develop an addiction you are tainted for life, completely broken and irredeemable. I don't agree with that. People can and do heal from addictions. I don't bring it up on the first date or whatnot but it's something that any close friend or partner of mine will know about. And those who try to use it against m…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 06:07 PM
5

Yeah I can understand shitting while in a sort of emotional turmoil which may be what is happening here but the shitting seems deliberate and planned. I've also heard of people shitting places out of revenge. I worked in retail and one angry customer shat in the upper toilet compartment in the restroom. Very bizarre.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 05:59 PM
30

I have never actually see someone shit themselves in anger but I have heard of it. Infamously in my high school, one child shat upon another in a feud over a girl. Logistics of the shitting were never clarified to me but the shitter was expelled.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy14/04/21 02:05 AM
53

Shaved his head out of anger 🤣 I can't, why do men do such complex tasks in response to anger? Like men who get so mad they poop. Why? Thanks for your support! I love y'all here and am so happy to share my completely insane stories here from my days as a bottom-feeding pickme because some of them are just WILD
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 11:58 PM
26

I have legit thought multiple times....women attracted to men need a union. Or at the very least, some way to compile and share information about serial abusers. I see so many times on SM, a very brave woman outs her abuser and is flooded by DMs from women saying the same man abused them. They'll often post screenshots of these DMs to protect the person's identity. People are ready to talk and want to talk but it's so risky and we know any website or database like that would be shut down/brigade…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 11:14 PM
15

Honestly the tough love is why I am here. When I was younger, I kept falling into the same patterns, toxic relationships, etc. And I surrounded myself who told me it wasn't my fault. I'm not saying it was my fault those men treated me poorly but I didn't do anything to stop them. So many times I didn't walk away when I clearly absolutely should have and no one would dispute that. I would just not tell anyone about those things and hide it out of shame. I knew I was letting myself down and active…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 11:03 PM
205

I like, just learned this and it is an absolute doozy unlearning all the shit I internalized that was just OBVIOUSLY men projecting. I literally just got out of therapy, sobbing, as I tried to explain some fucked up thought pattern I hadn't even realized came from something an ex told me - that I didn't exercise enough, when I exercised 4 hours a day on average. This was early pandemic and he had been letting himself go throughout our (very short) relationship, and his lack of fitness was set in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 10:55 PM
170

I am definitely a pickme in recovery. Most of what I write on here is a letter to myself. One day at a time. We'll get out of this cycle
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 05:17 PM
480

Ok I have noticed this sort of mindset among ladies in my life and wanted to post about it here for awhile but did not know the words and you nailed it! The term "hot girl summer" lately I see almost exclusively used by women surrounded by their women friends, having fun together with 0 men, and then the likes and comments on social media are again from all women showing love and support. I'm sure thirsty dudes try to make moves but their intentions and desires aren't in the spotlight. You can t…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/04/21 12:25 PM
3

Omg I haven't seen that episode of rick and morty but I absolutely must now! Last time I checked - prairie voles are monogamous and mountain voles are not and it's due to a single gene but I learned that in college and maybe we have learned more since then. My first lab gig was working with prairie voles so I know a lot about them 😊
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 11:18 AM
12

Same, although I think it has more to do with my face blindness. I have seen men in public and thought it could be an ex and it never is. My theory is: they romanticize their exes from their youth because 1) the woman was a girl, a child, and some men...prefer children 2) the woman at the time likely was immature and lacked boundaries, assertion, so she let him get away with all sorts of crap 3) now the man is in his thirties, women have grown up and call him out on stuff that the girl from high…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 11:16 AM
15

These men need to read about prairie voles - the animal model for "pair bonding." These lil critters "mate for life" in the wild and are physically indistinguishable from another type of vole that does not mate for life (the two differ by only a few genes I believe). They can form new pair bonds tens of times. The new pair bonds are most successful the longer time has passed since the last bond. Males do become more resistant to bond with new females as they age, after they've been paired before…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy12/04/21 11:12 AM
15

I have walked into too many bathrooms in men's apartments to find No. Hand soap. Like, the bathroom with no shower. And there's not even an option for washing your hands. And I have, yes, had this experience after sleeping with a person. Connecting the dots was not a good time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 10:47 PM
251

It's insanely weird how men hold onto memories of women from DECADES ago. I haven't met a single woman like that but I have met multiple men still pining for a woman from 5+ years prior, usually high school or college. It's really odd and pretty sad.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 07:11 PM
140

Women literally have to change their entire bodies to look a way that does not exist naturally in nature so this man can suck it up and plan something for once in his life Dude probably needs to be given explicit instructions for every task in his life, even at work. Sad, people like that don't usually get very far in society. It's also a sign that either his brain didn't develop properly or he could have some brain damage.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/04/21 07:09 PM
13

I interpreted the protests over the summer as being a reaction to all of the murders last spring (Arbery, Taylor, Floyd, McCain) and that Floyd's was the tipping point. Those murders were one after the other and rage was really building throughout that time. At the protests I saw many signs referencing Breonna. I never thought the protests were solely for Floyd Again, I'm in Chicago though and I don't really know how the rest of the world reacted. And I agree people weren't angry enough
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 04:37 PM
16

Same. That whole string of state murders but particularly her murder and the complete lack of any accountability for the officers broke me pretty bad. I live in Chicago where police brutality really hits home for a lot of people and there is still very active rage over her murder, especially in light of the botched raid of Anjanette Young's home, which everyone should be aware of. There is a video and it's extremely traumatizing to watch. She was naked during the raid. I believe statistically, B…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 04:17 PM
101

Yeah I just scanned his Wikipedia and found way too many examples of this and animal abuse. DMX was before my time. I don't really care about him or his death. But on social media I'm seeing a lot of celebration of PP's death and mourning of DMX. I get it because they represent entirely different things, and a lot of people want to see the monarchy end, but damn idk i don't think many people really know about DMX when they post tributes like this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 03:02 PM
23

This. The man was literally suffocated in broad daylight by a police officer when he wasn't charged with a crime. That is why people are so angry that it launched a international movement.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 02:58 PM
23

This is incorrect. Society was pretty fucking mad about Breonna Taylor.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy10/04/21 02:57 PM
430

I want to rent a car and drive to wherever this woman is and just like, sit with her. I don't even have shit to offer or a good attitude I'm just so sad for this person The way she writes reminds me of that woman whose boyfriend was in the room with her during their zoom court case (viral on reddit last month) - shaky, incoherent, constantly minimizing herself and questioning her words even as she types. Clearly a severely traumatized victim of horrible horrible abuse
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 12:39 PM
52

This...happened to me, when I was rather young. I never really processed it. He was a really big dude in all other aspects. Not really fat, just kinda chubby and out of shape. The first time I...experienced it, I went into straight denial and I was like oh he just wasn't hard cause he was nervous (🤡) Um. This is so bad. But he got in and...came immediately. IMMEDIATELY. And of course the condom did not stay on. I had to take plan B. I was in high school and this individual was 22. One of the wor…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 01:09 AM
15

I see a post like this pretty much every time I go on any of those advice subs, by a man about his wife though. I wonder how the response to this post compares to the typical response to the same posts by men.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/04/21 12:22 AM
14

I have sat here stunned at this audacity for several minutes. 23 years. Oh my god.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 10:20 PM
31

Who is this queen??
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/04/21 12:12 AM
363

!!!!! say it louder SEE ALSO: I became a feminist when I had a daughter I cross-dressed for a day and omg you wont believe how women are treated by society! (100k upvotes on 2X) Man reads exactly 1 book by a women and posts about it on social media with his newfound knowledge. Bonus points for "all men should read this" and it's like the Care and Keeping of You by american girl any expression of shock followed by massive performance of empathy when discovering basic aspects of the female experie…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 11:58 PM
44

Unfortunately there is significant overlap between conventional beauty standards for women and physical features of children. Hairless, big innocent eyes, tiny waist, tiny everything, innocent, submissive, clueless. I have a special problem where I actually resemble a little boy. I'm short, skinny, short haired, and I have a very boyish body. So I have attracted some men who are definitely gay and into little boys but are trying very hard to hide it. Last guy I was with left (long ago) his porn …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 04:12 PM
66

Recovering alcoholic here (years into recovery) and can confirm. Anyone even approaching that path is not in a position to date, and it only gets worse. And it always gets worse. Once you drink to deal with a problem you've crossed a line and it will only get worse until you quit entirely. For me I crossed a line when I learned alcohol could temporarily cure my social anxiety. Alcohol is special for two reasons: 1) it's the cheapest and most accessible drug for everyone 2) it wreaks havoc on you…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 01:09 PM
23

I agree, I think all are pretty bare bones, reasonable expectations for anyone on a date (except the offer to pay thing) but what stands out to me is how rarely men meet all of these. I've had many men show up to dates late, in work clothes, look at their phone, etc. In fact I don't think I've had a date where a man met all these expectations. But also I was a real bottom feeder in my dating days so...probably says more about me. The audacity here IMO is the fact that someone wrote out this bull…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy06/04/21 12:55 PM
40

Yeah I wasn't trying to say waitressing and sex work are generally comparable, more that for me it sometimes felt like a softer version of it because I would literally flash cleavage and flirt with gross old men for tips. I think it had to do more with the particular restaurant in my case.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 10:01 PM
110

There's this documentary on netflix (or used to be) by the actress who played Ann Perkins about the amateur porn industry. I can't remember what it's called, but it's a great watch and can be helpful to gain some insight into what attracts young women to voluntarily do sex work. I don't agree with the reasons, I wouldn't do it myself, but the truth is the whole industry preys on very young girls who don't have their full noggin developed (the part important for decision-making ripens around mid …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy05/04/21 09:17 PM
4

Ok I read this and: The source of the story is Chris. Known pathological liar. He apparently told his cellmate who leaked to this...not so credible news organization. Also, Nicole changed her identity. Even if someone contacted Chris it could be someone playing pretend. Remember, Chris is fucking stupid as hell and seems to be narcissistic. Idk I think this is just clickbait nonsense.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 01:35 PM
9

Lol! No! A little ADHD sure but yeah it was an anomaly.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 01:21 PM
24

I got preggo like 1 month into a relationship with a new guy (long ago, pickme days, etc) I legit got an abortion and did not tell him. Paid out of pocket. I was that unwilling to risk this at that age. I would do it again now. Of course, I went on to date the guy and he turned out to be awful.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 12:27 AM
231

I have wanted to talk about this one dude for a long time on here and this is my opportunity. Years ago (deep in my pickme days) I met a guy on tinder and went on a few dates with him. He actually took me on proper dates but man he was so awkward, and he kind of fat/bald-fished me - I was willing to look past it cause he was generally nicer and more respectable than the others. Well, there was one issue. He was clearly the baby of the whole family tree and patted himself on the back for the litt…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/04/21 12:02 AM
6

Also why would we trust Chris's word after watching that doc. He LIES so much! The whole documentary is like 2 hours of him lying
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 06:11 PM
1

I saw the documentary and what stood out to me is that Chris was a fucking idiot but somehow had the charm, the looks to manipulate at least one woman into overlooking his shiftiness, emptiness, narcissism. Shannan described all the red flags in her videos but all in this happy tone, painting the picture of a happy family. And all her friends and family bought it too. I remember the testimony of Shannan's dad basically saying "this man tricked us into welcoming him into our family." So my interp…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 06:09 PM
1

I don't think she's without any wrongdoing whatsoever but she literally didn't break the law. She's not a criminal. She didn't kill anyone or plan to. Everything fucked up that happened was because of what Chris decided to do and the did. That part that made you cry in the doc was CHRIS KILLING HIS CHILD, alone, without her present. I think it's worth reflecting on why you can type more anger for this woman than for the murderer, manipulator himself.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 06:00 PM
2

I kinda get that. I see her more as a pickme who was a bit obsessed with a cute guy at work and led to make some bad decisions. probably not someone I would be friends with or put my kids around but not someone I think should be slandered as much as Chris or Brock Turner. Those people committed the crimes, planned them, went through with them, lied about it, etc. Likewise I'm sure Brock Turner had a buddy who encouraged him to do what he did or otherwise led Brock to think it was acceptable but …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 05:57 PM
134

TMI definitely but I get the world's worst uncontrollable farts around my period or when I consume artificial sweeteners. I thought for a second, could I be with someone who found this...quirk of mine...sexy? No, I could not! Thank you for inspiring me to go on this soul search and learn something new about myself. Congrats on leaving the guy and holding up your standards!!!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 03:01 PM
43

My comment was deleted but I just wanna throw in my card and say I don't think this woman deserves the amount of slander she gets. She easily gets more slander than Chris. I also don't totally trust the "ladbible" here but maybe this is better documented elsewhere Edit: apparently my og comment wasn't deleted so sorry for the double post! Leaving this up though cause there were comments under it
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 02:58 PM
9

Yeah this post is just not in line with my personal experience. I have heard all these narratives coming from different sides. Both the "you can't talk about racism cause it hurts my white feelings" and the argument that a society free of racism benefits everyone, not just those targeted by racism today. Same for all the other things listed. Edit: I'll add a thought I've been having lately. Racist and prejudiced white people are often the targets of rehabilitative justice. Their actions are seen…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 02:51 PM
154

Given the source on the image I do not totally believe this. I will say that woman may have been a pickme but under no circumstances did she deserve the slander she got. She didn't kill that woman and those girls. I have by and large heard more criticism of her and her actions than of Chris the fucking murderer. It drives me bananas
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/04/21 02:45 PM
117

Omg I saw this thread. I saw this comment, read the first line and noped right out. Very very disturbing how everyone has sympathy for the pedo and wants to talk rehabilitative justice in that thread. Which I'm personally for but you NEVER see that on reddit. Reddit loves to grab it's pitchforks over the littlest things. Not for the crying pedophile though...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy02/04/21 10:04 PM
5

Thanks so much for replying. This is all great advice. I think that this is probably brought on by the lack of exercise this week due to my "staycation." The TV is a good idea too, I used to watch more TV or at least keep it on and I haven't lately. I think if this guy doesn't get the hint soon i will change my number. Feels drastic but I think it would be nice for 0 dudes from my past to know how to contact me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 12:58 PM
19

Yeah I always thought I had a low libido or was maybe on the ace spectrum because in every relationship I start out with a high libido and then lose it after a couple months. And with a few it's low from the start. Never had a high libido throughout a relationship. And a few guys suggested I was ace. When I found FDS it hit me that wait...maybe it had more to do with all my exes fully revealing themselves to be shitty by that point
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/04/21 12:07 AM
22

I was thinking either there is more to this story (ie she lost her sex drive while with him and he decided to call her asexual - has happened to me more than once!) or this is made up tbh. Or two people got married who shouldn't have.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 10:45 PM
7

Just need to vent. Having a crappy, boring spring break off from work and my head has been drifting to some unpleasant topics. The usual - I'm ugly, gonna die alone, etc. I have been trying to keep my mind occupied and it kind of works but not super well. I dated a guy over a year ago for about six months. He was a classic LVM. Porn addict, mommy issues, 0 emotional intelligence, 0 attempts at therapy despite great need, hung up on exes, self-obsessed, etc. He broke up with me over text and I mo…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 10:35 PM
97

Right? The stick figures are literally the color black and they had to specify "ok but this character is Black the rest aren't"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy31/03/21 10:23 PM
81

I've had short and long hair. There are some men that are really freaking into short hair. Trust me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy30/03/21 11:52 PM
7

This same exact situation happened with me and my lvx except with biking. Esp the pandemic part. I will never forget when he bailed on a bike ride without telling me because I was beating him, and how he never rode his bike again after that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy29/03/21 01:57 AM
10

When I read this I take it quite literally and think he is looking for a woman who can keep up with the rate and force of his hip thrusts during sex..and I think actually I might be right much of the time
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/03/21 05:29 PM
10

I totally feel the same way as you about my past relationships. And I admit I often feel a bit hopeless. Even the "better" guys I dated were like this. But overall I think the problem was me settling for people who would ever be with someone and treat them that way. It's LV in general to date someone yet be ready to leave if someone "hotter" comes along, or to have wandering eyes and lingering feelings for other women. Think of it this way: think of all the long term happy couples you have ever …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 11:16 PM
10

I missed that. Wtf so like thirty dollars a pop at the very least...that alone, without the pee...heck even just one dress shirt used as a cum rag would be the end for me
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 09:24 PM
66

She probably even pees in the toilet
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:47 PM
114

I reread this and realized...she was with a FRIEND. How mortifying must this have been to discover something this absolutely atrocious with a friend present. I also highly suspect this was the last straw of many. This guy probably has loads of other gross, skeezy, degenerate behaviors and she saw this, with a friend present, and the friend was like yep this is it you cannot stay with this creature!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:46 PM
40

Here 1 is bad, but I could do some mental gymnastics to excuse it if he is really telling the truth. But 100s! And the t shirts! 40 of them! I don't own 40 t shirts and I have kept every free t shirt since college! I'm going to drink bleach and cry for a few hours
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:43 PM
77

Yeah uh this should be national news. Stir up some outrage over this. There is nothing okay about this
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 12:23 PM
10

Yep. Ex pickme daughter of a pickme mother here. Crazy is she used to tell me to have this and that standards for men...all while complaining day in and day out about how much he hates my lvm dad, who meets none of those standards, who she is still married to. Same woman has told me to change this and that about myself for men, never get a tattoo cause what if men don't like it, dress this way because men, don't have a personality whatsoever because of men. Same woman went after my alcoholic/abu…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 11:44 AM
125

This has the same vibes as guys who take selfies with other people's cars and make them their profile photo on social media 🤣
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/03/21 11:07 AM
17

I just ignore them. Look disinterested. If it's over text or social media I don't engage. Change the subject or just stop responding. It's happened to me on social media before and I just pretend I never saw it. Everyone can see for themselves what the person is doing and that's enough satisfaction for me.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 09:43 PM
28

Fortunately most of the men who I would speak up like this about are deadbeat losers who will likely only ever make the news if they commit a major crime or are outed as abusers. There is one, however, who I can see going viral in a way like this or succeeding in his career enough to have any platform. It's unlikely, but he at least has a career...lol. I know if that happens to expect many posts like this, and I have actually sort of prepared my response if the guy ever gets outed publicly. I kn…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 01:02 PM
26

42k a year is like, just enough to live with roommates in most US cities and have a single hobby in many cities...deff not enough to like, have a kid. Or a wedding. You know, things a lot of women want.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 12:04 PM
44

Yeah I read the first two tweets and I was like yes I agree and then the third was just out of nowhere. People hear "female incels" and think we endorse everything incels are saying...all they need to do is go on this page for like 1 minute and see that isn't true Similar vibes as people who, without looking at it, label shitliberalssay as a conservative sub.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy25/03/21 11:29 AM
82

Men are like "no one cares about our mental health" when we literally do but we get abused for showing that we care and trying to help them Like, raise your hand if you've dated someone who had "mental health issues" and tried to help them and they fucking abused you or took advantage of you.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy22/03/21 11:05 AM
7

It's probably better she stays a single child with lots of love and positive role modeling in the long run if the other option is sibling with another lvm father. I read your story and was thinking about myself and my parents. My mom never left my lvm dad but resents him constantly. I had siblings but I don't know them anymore. Our home life was such a mess that now everyone resents each other. I don't think having a sibling is that make-or-break. Siblings fuck each other up all the time.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 03:53 PM
17

Your daughter is going to watch you go through the journey of removing yourself from that cycle of toxicity and discovering your worth and that is huge!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy21/03/21 12:54 PM
11

Yeah or for starters, a database of men who are abusive/racist/otherwise hateful on social media. It's insane how many do it openly under their own legal name.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 10:39 PM
10

im just gonna sit in this corner and be upset for awhile about this!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/03/21 12:17 AM
33

😭 thank you
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 07:49 PM
50

...would someone, as gently as possible, please clarify what mound refers to here?
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy19/03/21 07:14 PM
12

Last guy I dated (over a year ago) was super porn sick. His way of "initiating" was to just start pawing at my pubic area. I am not even exaggerating. Like we would be sitting on the couch and he would just start poking it or something. When we broke up he accused me of "tricking him" into thinking he had "finally found someone who actually likes sex" and at that moment it all clicked...
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 01:51 PM
27

I have been following this as well. Dude is a piece. Of. Work. Textbook narcissist abuser. Painfully stupid. Just a brain stem with a pathological need for power and control. I feel so bad for the woman who is going through likely one of the worst times of her life and it's going viral with all her name and info for no fault of her own.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/03/21 12:41 AM
40

I think my comment was removed cause I linked the sub, oops. It was confessions, title was "best decision I ever made"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:27 PM
1

It was one of the popular ones cause I saw it on r/all. I think one of the "off my chest" or "confession" subs or askmen or something like that. I might have commented on it so lemme see if I can find it and I'll re-comment if I do Edit: it was confessions. Search "best decision I ever made confessions"
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:22 PM
191

I did see the original post of this wherever it was and was glad to see this guy get ripped to shreds. What stands out to me is his complete lack of bond or regard for the CHILD whose life he has been a part of for as long as the child had working memory!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:06 PM
234

People need to start calling it what it is! Male supremacy. Misogyny and patriarchy are not strong enough terms IMO. I think male supremacy is fundamental to white supremacy and people don't see that. They want to distinguish between the two and language helps with that.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy17/03/21 03:04 PM
3

I've known guys who tried to take their parents or roommates pet when they moved out. One guy actually renamed his roommate's cat and told me "she's really my cat." Most of this was back in undergrad so I hope those boys...figured out whatever they needed to figure out.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy16/03/21 11:03 AM
48

Guys have the weirdest egos around animals. Really, every guy thinks he's the animal whisperer. I have a cat. She's a regular cat. She loves every person. She also climbs on stuff and is a little shit sometimes. I've had multiple guys (including, I think, my current roommate) think that my cat loves them more than anyone in the world, and that somehow their bond with the cat is this sacred thing. They think that means they can do whatever with the cat. Break our feeding schedule, give her table …
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 03:51 PM
44

I went on tinder for one night a few months ago NOT to date but to catch a suspected cheater for someone else. I was disgusted. I was looking in the age range 35-45 at least 1/4 men were married or in a relationship men claiming to be vaccinated in like, early January with their job listed as software developer or some shit the worst one: white men with BLM in their bio. What? Are you using BLM to get laid??? I did not catch the cheater because I did not last more than 15 mins on that app. I was…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy15/03/21 12:49 PM
6

Oh yeah, it's real complicated. My mom tried to "help" her but [might be a narcissist] and definitely...didn't actually help. I think there were conflicts that led to my sis going no contact with them permanently. I was a kid and unfortunately was manipulated by my parents to play messenger with my sis for awhile. I've talked to her a few times but we never really had a relationship and it's been a few years. I looked her up and she changed her name, seems to be married. I know she had mental he…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 08:50 PM
15

Omg. Yeah, I was a 19yo preyed upon by a guy in his thirties. We dated for like 5 months and he would get frustrated about things that were clearly caused by the age difference. I wasn't interested in shit like investments, tech, cars, buying a home, didn't get stupid shit like reminiscing about high school, couldn't legally drink at a bar, etc. Because you know, I was a kid living in a dorm room that I shared with another kid. Literally. Even if the guy has best intentions, it's not appropriate…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 08:43 PM
18

I should add I'm speaking out of my ass 😂 I'm still on the journey but really believing in the outcome. Lord help my vestigial pickme tail when I get a vaccine this summer. It's going to HARD not to get on that rollercoaster when it shows up at my door, cause I know it will. Gonna stay strong though cause I know that ride is only fun for about 2 minutes and 30 seconds. I need a few more years for sure. OP, I am with you and we will exit this cycle forever!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:56 PM
137

Sis if he's 35 sniffing after 24yos that's a huge red flag. Why can't he find anyone his own age? If he can and prefers not to, that's WORSE. Your brain is not fully developed until your late twenties. He knows this. Edit: to answer your q and give advice, my advice is to take years off from dating and do your own thing. You will mature in that time and when you start dating again, you will be better able to recognize what you don't want/need and kick it to the curb.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 02:00 PM
18

Im not even conventionally attractive and even I get men sliding in my DMs and creeping on me IRL...like, really some of these people will fuck anything they perceive to have the right holes. How can I be an incel when just yesterday a dude I ghosted on tinder 3 years ago reached out to "catch up" (fuck) lmao I hate my life
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:44 PM
18

I have a sibling who has autism and some mental health issues and when she moved out on her own for college, fell victim to what this guy is describing. She had never been pursued or wanted by anyone and suddenly this charming, manipulative, [homeless crackhead on parole] was sweet talking her and you know what happened. They went on a road trip together in a van with all her belongings. You know what happened. One day she called my mum because it was all gone. He sold all her stuff and then got…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy13/03/21 01:13 PM
7

This whole thing is a wild journey. All the same person! Imagine spending that much effort to lie about yourself instead of using that energy to actually improve yourself. Elevator shoes, the zoom filter, the fact that he clearly kept touching you in public...I think you won NVM bingo. Thanks for sharing this and I hope you can look back it and laugh one day at this...individual and the choices they made Edit: I went back and read it again. It's like a terrible car accident. I just wanted to add…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy11/03/21 12:20 AM
63

International women's day is the most meaningless gesture of anti-sexism that maybe at best yields a few hollow social media posts from corporations and individuals but it's not like it's a national holiday or observed in any capacity outside of general virtue-signalling. And people really get jealous about it? It's like being mad on "national dog day" that you have a parakeet and there's no "national parakeet day" even though there probably is and it's probably just as meaningless as national d…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy09/03/21 01:32 PM
27

This is clearly a narcissist or a child
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy07/03/21 11:00 PM
11

I also have what I describe as pickme dreams. It's like a phantom limb. My brain has a very strong tendency to go into pickme mode and my dreams tell me that I have a lot of work to do to get rid of that mental habit. I also have dreams about other situations that no longer apply - final exams in college, etc. I wonder if this is also my brain going back to a hard wired pattern. All speculative of course. the dreams do make me rather...depressed, almost ashamed when I wake up. I try to reflect o…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:09 PM
2

It's like the equivalent of "sandwich artist." Imagine working at subway and introducing yourself as an artist (and not being an actual artist on the side, ofc)
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy04/03/21 03:03 PM
53

The engineer thing! Ok, this is a major pattern I have seen. And I never cared because I don't really care if someone is an engineer or not, it doesn't impress or interest me to be honest. But yeah, guys with a BA in computer science calling themselves "customer support engineer" at some unheard of company sums up my early twenties dating experience in a coastal city.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy03/03/21 02:53 PM
6

Omg I am not actually. I just looked it up and apparently that's where he is now. Gross.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 10:45 PM
13

I honestly think men just aren't vetted for positions with the same scrutiny as anyone else. Particularly white men. I work for a university that has racist staff, faculty, students, etc coming out of the woodwork these days. The most famous incident was with someone with the last name Kanazawa (I believe, not trying to look this guy up) who published articles claiming Black women are scientifically less attractive, or something dumb like that. The university literally said they hadn't looked in…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy01/03/21 10:35 PM
35

I think a lot of people in this sub have histories that look like your present. At least I do. And that history is not so far off. Less than a year ago I was in a very unhappy relationship that sounds like yours. I was putting up with stuff I didn't like and settling for less than I deserve. When that relationship ended, I began following FDS more and trying to adopt some of it's principles. I think you will hear a lot of people tell you to end this relationship. I agree with them. You aren't ha…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy28/02/21 06:52 PM
64

"she" lol
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 11:52 PM
117

I saw that post on true off my chest. At the time most of the top comments were calling it out as ridiculous, which was a relief. I see posts like that all the time and usually just roll my eyes but "feminists will destroy society" was just so uniquely over the top.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy27/02/21 10:18 PM
16

Oh yeah, that's a good point.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 02:02 AM
102

If you see ((name)) or (((name))) - run. That's neo-nazi shit.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy26/02/21 12:00 AM
2

I...yeah, they really nailed it for me. I have certainly been gaining resilience and doing great work in therapy and on my own, in the gym, etc, but I am really losing my mind. I'm young and kind of poor, for context.
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 01:17 AM
47

Baking! Baking and decorating a cake or cookies is so fun. A selfie photoshoot: get dolled up and take some pics Plants cost money at first, but they grow and make new leaves, so you're always getting a new plant. If you know anyone with plants or work somewhere with plants, you can grow some plants from just a leaf cutting. Art! Some start up cost, but you can get some supplies for cheap that will go a long way like colored pencils. Depending on where you live, you could get into birding! Rando…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy23/02/21 12:36 AM
26

Of all the "jokes" like this I have seen in my life, this is the most transparent promise to murder you I have ever seen
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy20/02/21 03:13 PM
5

Oh my god. So, so awful. Daphne lowkey rapes simon so she can have a baby with a man who she forced to marry her and clearly doesn't want her or the things she wants. After he basically almost ruined her reputation because he couldn't control his horny urges in public. Both simon and daphne are pieces of shit. Also it was immediately obvious to me who Lady Whistledown was. By episode 5 I was like what is the point of this show anymore? It's over And then it just gets worse!
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 03:15 PM
210

You are not alone! I read so many stories similar to yours on here, and I've been in relationships just like that. This dynamic is so, so common. Fds is the first place I have seen where thousands of women have come together to share these stories. It always strikes me how similar they are. And how most of the posters like yourself apologize and feel ashamed for having been a pickme. don't! I think these "pickme" tendencies come from a desire to do good, to help, to care - and those are all good…
/r/FemaleDatingStrategy18/02/21 02:04 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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