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View 1 posts and 151 comments by ngroot on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
35

ngroot/r/seduction08/05/11 08:52 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
1

The problem being you is a good thing, because that means dealing with it is in your power.
/r/seduction09/12/12 11:33 PM
2

What's your rejection percentage? I would count a good conversation and friendly banter to be a win. Depends on what your goals are, doesn't it?
/r/seduction09/12/12 11:31 PM
2

No. If girls are giving you the vibe that they really want to be somewhere else either you're feeling yourself because you're scared, or you're unattractive and they don't want you around. either way, your problem, and you can fix it.
/r/seduction09/12/12 06:57 PM
7

I always carry a Slap Chop for similar reasons.
/r/seduction04/12/12 02:41 PM
1

Good advice. I'd add another point to the bit about posture: good breathing will naturally help you to stand up straighter and vice versa.
/r/seduction12/11/12 04:46 AM
143

Don't put them on a pedestal, Sounds more like you're putting them on a throne.
/r/seduction12/09/12 11:39 AM
-1

lets not forget what that the goal of seduction is to find an amazing girl for yourself. Says who?
/r/seduction13/08/12 06:08 PM
15

One of the biggest things my mom talks about is how patients don't take the complete doses of antibiotics. This is utterly fucking baffling to me.
/r/seduction10/08/12 01:48 PM
1

You must, must MUST know how to have a conversation. Yes. There are a lot of illiterate jackasses on the site who don't know the difference between "too" and "to" or what a paragraph is, and can't figure out why no one will respond to their messages. For them, I feel no sympathy. Also: read the OKCupid blog. They fucking TELL you how to game the system because they want you to.
/r/seduction04/08/12 11:48 PM
3

All of them pretend to be someone they are not. Plus, since they get 50 plus messages a day, they think they are awesome. I met several very cool (I would go so far as to say awesome) gals on OKC. They didn't pretend to be people they weren't, and while they did get lots of messages, most of them were from mouth-breathing jackasses who couldn't use the English language.
/r/seduction04/08/12 11:46 PM
7

From what I've learned is that most korean girls smile if they make eye contact with me, and I take this as an invitation into conversation; Smiling may indicate discomfort or amusement in a number of Asian cultures.
/r/seduction26/07/12 07:59 PM
2

Through the mouse, actually.
/r/seduction09/07/12 11:13 AM
-2

Probably for the same reason I'm downvoting it: shouting.
/r/seduction09/07/12 04:46 AM
2

Dance the dance, confidently How do you do that? actually learn how to dance. If there's a beginner lesson before a dance in a style you've never done before, TAKE IT.
/r/seduction11/06/12 07:00 PM
1

At least in swing dance classes, this has not been my experience. Also, if you take a beginner swing dance class and the instructor gives students the option to not change partners, look at who does and who doesn't. The folks who don't change partners are the ones you'll never see again. :-)
/r/seduction11/06/12 05:21 PM
5

define what creepy is Dance the dance, confidently, and you almost certainly will not be creepy. You want to engage your partner using the dance, not by luring them onto the floor with the promise of a dance and then trying to awkwardly grope them. An important corollary of this is actually learn how to dance. If there's a beginner lesson before a dance in a style you've never done before, TAKE IT. This is particularly problematic in the blues dancing scene, and both guys and girls are guilty of…
/r/seduction11/06/12 05:17 PM
3

I'll just note that if you go blues dancing, you'll have lots of women who want to engage in 3-5 minute hugs with you. :-)
/r/seduction26/04/12 04:53 PM
-1

I'd think how much you can squat shallow would be a more relevant exercise, and most people can shallow squat a lot of weight. I.e., you don't have to be very strong.
/r/seduction26/04/12 04:50 PM
6

(no homo) ಠ_ಠ Really.
/r/seduction26/04/12 04:47 PM
1

Being a domineering prick doesn't work out well, in my observation, for getting laid or making friends. If this guy you hate has lots of people who like to hang around him...maybe he's actually an interesting guy. Learning how to make yourself attractive has nothing to do with whether or not you view women as equals. I'm not even sure what that means when stated so broadly, beyond simply acknowledging that they're human too. Be an interesting person. Be confident. Learn to socialize well in a gr…
/r/seduction17/01/12 03:05 PM
0

I resent being categorized as emotionally insecure.
/r/seduction09/01/12 10:27 PM
3

This is pretty content-free. Also, the bit about "fitness" is pretty much on par with "take the elevator instead of the stairs!"; i.e., it's not going to yield useful results. Unless you're doing hours of dance class every day, or are doing breakdancing or something similarly intense, it's not going to be a meaningful workout. And as always, you don't work out to (directly) lose weight. You can't outrun your diet. If you want a great body, go to /r/fitness and /r/loseit.
/r/seduction27/12/11 03:30 PM
2

Yes, if you do it well. No if move like you've been learning from this video.
/r/seduction27/12/11 03:26 PM
2

Learn at least one partner dance; blues would be an obvious choice for many of the folks here, I suspect. I quite enjoy swing dancing as well, because the social structure is set up so that you meet tons of people. Learn to move solo on a club floor without looking like an idiot. There are a number of videos on YouTube that offer advice on how to do this. Here's one I found a while back that does not suck: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0q5gBK-Z8E.
/r/seduction27/12/11 03:25 PM
1

Thinking about ten different ways to start a conversation is great, though.
/r/seduction22/12/11 09:22 PM
2

In a club or wherever there's a dance floor, you don't have to be a "good" dancer, you just have to be comfortable. I'd flip this around: being comfortable is an important part of being a good dancer, but you absolutely can be comfortable and still look like your goofy uncle at a wedding. He's having a good time, right? Do you want to look like him? There are a number of "how to dance" videos on YouTube; a quick search turns this up, which is pretty good: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0q5gBK-…
/r/seduction16/12/11 05:18 PM
2

The point is, you know that the kiss was rejected. You have data to work with. You're not wondering, "will she kiss me?"
/r/seduction23/11/11 08:06 PM
3

you don't stick around if the situation ain't improving man Moreover, you force the issue. There shouldn't be an "isn't improving" option; just "escalated" and "blew up". There's no question about whether she'll kiss you by the fourth date if you're going for a kiss on the first date. Either she kisses you back or moves away. Interest or non-interest determined.
/r/seduction23/11/11 06:37 PM
5

What's he losing by waiting six dates for a blowjob?
/r/seduction23/11/11 06:34 PM
8

FUCKING VINCENT VAN GOGH OF PUA RIGHT HERE. EXTREME PEACOCKING Even Mystery doesn't have the balls to cut off his ear.
/r/seduction23/11/11 06:33 PM
1

A less symmetrical posture like [1] Michelangelo's David makes the fall of the hands more natural and fluid. Yeah, this is key. It can look stiff, like you're standing at attention, if you don't introduce some asymmetry.
/r/seduction21/11/11 02:56 PM
6

But I recognized a gap knowledge that I need to correct. Excellent! Unless I've greatly missed my mark, you want to learn blues dancing. Check out a few examples: Dancing to more "blues-y" music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7yJ3QX3B5Y https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNVpNbZrcX8 Dancing to hip-hoppy club-y music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00Av1VNnuQU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqIwF1ntJbE Your idea of tango is in the right vein, but probably a little too far into the realm of "ser…
/r/seduction07/11/11 05:47 PM
3

just kinda move to the music The trick is to do this in a way that's attractive. :-) That's all I do- and it's what most people do, because most people haven't taken formal dance lessons (especially if they're younger than like 25). ...and, as a consequence, actually knowing how to lead a girl in a dance is often a big turn-on.
/r/seduction07/11/11 05:25 PM
1

I don't know if it could, but it isn't.
/r/seduction01/11/11 11:04 PM
1

Psychologically speaking, the younger a woman looks, the more attractive she is to men because she represents fertility. I'll accept that as a reasonable hypothesis. Oh and the reason you like nipples is because of the association you made as a baby, sucking on your mothers tit, that nipples provide food, security and comfort. I don't really have anything particularly for or against nipples. Maybe I was the wire-mother monkey. I'd love to see some evidence supporting this. In other words, breast…
/r/seduction01/11/11 11:03 PM
0

I see your point, but you might want to pick a different example...breast size has nothing to do with any meaningful kind of reproductive fitness. :-)
/r/seduction01/11/11 09:06 PM
3

Those aren't numbers, those are crabs.
/r/seduction07/10/11 05:19 PM
6

It's not the trust, it's the nuisance, I'm guessing.
/r/seduction02/10/11 05:04 PM
1

If you want to practice your non-verbal negotiation skills (eye contact, body language, indications of acceptance or rejection, etc.), do a little bit of tango. Not kidding. Read about cabeceo.
/r/seduction15/09/11 06:05 PM
2

Conversely, I'm pretty sure that this is what player-haters think is going on in our heads: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_M-BcQLEAJY
/r/seduction25/08/11 12:13 PM
3

(the ship is my penis)
/r/seduction02/08/11 11:52 AM
12

"I wish you the best" is a polite way of saying "go away". Do so. If you keep at her, you'll just be annoying. Give her some space, and after a while if you're still available and interested, offer an invite to something or other if she hasn't contacted you. If she accepts, roll with it and make no mention of her comment about "not being ready to be back in the dating game". If you're FB friends, checking up on her profile every now and again might give you an idea of when and if a good time to …
/r/seduction16/07/11 10:47 PM
10

They complain that they would need to change who they are in order to be successful. This alone clinches it.
/r/seduction14/07/11 05:53 PM
4

1) Smile in your picture. If you're a guy, as a rule, don't smile, and don't look at the camera. The OkCupid blog (which every sedditor should really read!) did an article a while back analyzing who can actually get people to respond to them---guys who didn't smile and weren't making eye contact did way better than guys who did. Girls, on the other hand, should do pretty much the opposite.
/r/seduction08/06/11 01:30 PM
16

Nice. Something else that I'm guessing is so basic that you don't even have to think about it, but a lot of us whiteboys took a while to figure out: move your BODY, not just BODY PARTS. Movement generally begins from your core and moves outward. E.g., you mention a head bob. Look in a mirror and try bobbing your head with and without letting your body pulse with the beat. You'll look awkward and weird without that pulse. In fact, for the real Dancing-101 folks, you can look like you're dancing j…
/r/seduction03/06/11 04:00 PM
1

if I had to dance on two I would probably end up doing swing, lol. This is what happens to me too. I try to do club salsa and end up doing balboa because the footwork closely resembles a single-time balboa basic. :-)
/r/seduction16/05/11 11:46 AM
2

Nice. I could totally see square dancing being a good intro. Contra is very similar and seems to be easier to find, at least in Chicago and NYC. One thing I try to keep in mind when I'm introducing people to dancing is the different cultures that surround each dance; not everyone wants the same kind of environment. Swing tends to be a younger crowd (the bulk of the people are 20s and 30s), very non-stratified (anyone can ask anyone to dance), and more fun than hot. Salsa (the bit that I've seen …
/r/seduction15/05/11 02:11 PM
1

A tip for UK men: if you feel like hopping the pond, I don't know any gal here (U.S.) who doesn't love any accent from the Isles.
/r/seduction13/05/11 01:46 PM
3

Oh, good point. No, you absolutely do not need a partner. Especially in the swing dance community, you are encouraged to dance with a variety of people. In classes,you'll rotate partners.
/r/seduction09/05/11 04:04 AM
4

As in, "what happened to her was because of her bad decisions". "to her"? To them. They slept together. And I believe that I said that it was bad decisions on both of their parts. Does part of it rest on her shoulders? Absolutely, if she was saying yes/escalating things at the time. which points out to lack of consent. Just because I've been drinking doesn't mean that I don't know what's going on---there's a big difference between "drunk" and "delirious". You make different decisions when you're…
/r/seduction09/05/11 12:12 AM
1

consent while intoxicated IANAL, but I'm pretty sure the tl;dr version in every state is "you can't give consent while intoxicated".
/r/seduction09/05/11 12:03 AM
3

There's plenty of blame to go around here. If it happened as OP stated: the gal made the decision to get drunk, and then decided to sleep with someone when she wouldn't have done that sober, and the OP slept with a very drunk stranger. There's plenty of dumb on both sides.
/r/seduction08/05/11 10:37 PM
6

That means she was incapable of giving consent in any meaningful way. She was incapable of giving consent in a legal way.
/r/seduction08/05/11 10:31 PM
13

Be very careful with that. That might work on S. Random Sorority Girl with self-esteem issues at Ye Olde Clube, but unless it's delivered very well, that will go over like a lead balloon on anyone who actually social dances. I've seen it happen. You do not tell someone to dance. You ask, you propose ("hey, let's dance!"), but you do not dictate. If you don't social dance, you're probably not thinking about the other half of the equation: it's rude to turn down a dance without a reason. If you as…
/r/seduction08/05/11 09:20 PM
9

Ugh. I would recommend never, ever saying that. OP got lucky that the gal was not a social dancer. A basic bit of etiquette in any social dance style that I've seen is that you don't push unprompted lessons on the dance floor. Generally the guys who try are a) not very good and b) skeevy as hell. If the gal had been a social dancer, he probably would have at best gotten a Look Of Disapproval and "no, thank you", or if she felt like being mean, she might have accepted and then made him look like …
/r/seduction08/05/11 07:51 PM
1

Validation.
/r/seduction16/04/11 04:29 AM
5

Səriously. Looks not bəing a sinə qua non is diffərənt than "not mattəring". If you'rə not a good-looking dudə you can totally gət past that on bəhavior and comportmənt (and it's əasiər for us than thə ladiəs), but why sət up an əxtra hurdlə for yoursəlf?
/r/seduction01/04/11 02:59 PM
1

I still contend that if a guy were to concentrate on financing and business he would have more to show for it after five years than a college degree and a 9-5. What kind of business are you going to be qualified to start straight out of high school? For that matter, how much does a high school grad know about financing /or/ business? The same thing can be said of degree-carrying hobos living under the brooklyn bridge. Unemployment is substantially lower for degree-having folks than those without…
/r/seduction28/03/11 08:02 PM
1

That's a very Zen solution. I approve!
/r/seduction24/03/11 02:32 PM
6

-Try to shake hands with your palm facing downward, to show dominance. An "equal" handshake occurs when both dominant players "struggle" to an equal outcome with palms to the sides. Just because some people try to do this doesn't mean that it's a good idea. It's about as subtle as a noogie in terms of someone trying to assert themselves over you, and roughly as mature. Moreover, most of the time when people have tried this on me (and I'd imagine this fairly common), it's just led to a botched, a…
/r/seduction23/03/11 01:54 PM
1

As nessaj said, buy the book. If you haven't gathered from T3hJ3hu's piles of bullet points here, it's an informative and fun read. The one bad thing, IIRC, is that it's also full of "explanations" for how this body language developed, which are mostly evolutionary psychological blather (though amusing). Also, if you want a GREAT illustration of the power of body language, check out this debate between Bill Clinton and George H.W. Bush. Specifically, watch it with the sound off. You'll appreciat…
/r/seduction23/03/11 01:39 PM
1

Would you agree that there are better ways of investing 110k and 5 years? That's obviously not a question with a general answer. For someone who's got no education beyond high school and little to no relevant skills or business experience, they're likely not going to know thing one about running a business. For someone who's struck on something people want and has the experience and connections to create a business to fill that desire, 110K and five years could be awesome. Also, I'm not sure whe…
/r/seduction22/03/11 04:52 PM
1

Most folks are not going to be able to come up with 100K in financing right after high school. School loans are way easier to get than new business loans, especially for someone who's in their late teens or early twenties and has neither practical experience nor academic preparation. A high-school level of education isn't enough preparation for many technical kinds of work. Also, most new business fail. It's not as easy as you're making it sound, the chances of you being well-prepared to make a …
/r/seduction20/03/11 06:23 PM
2

Hm...it's been a while. I would guess about $50K. I was lucky that my folks were willing to pay for undergrad, so I didn't have debt to pay off there, though I don't think student loan payments would have been overly burdensome had I had to deal with them. I did pay for grad school out of my own pocket, which was...maybe $60K with tuition, paying my mortgage while not holding a job, etc. It was absolutely worth it for the increase in pay, though.
/r/seduction19/03/11 06:04 PM
1

Went to a state university from 1997-2002, which was relatively cheap. I was able to do a variety of IT-related jobs thanks to a combination of my practical experience and academic background. The pay was reasonably good in all the positions that I took, to the point that I was able to put down a downpayment on a condo when I was...25? 26? I went back for a masters in financial mathematics in 2007, which my background in computer science and physics was a perfect prep for. The program was overal…
/r/seduction18/03/11 07:08 PM
2

Disagree with your disagreement. Formal education of certain types is extremely useful. My physics and computer science studies have served me very well. I've used a lot of the material from both, directly or indirectly, and the chances of learning the same material "on the job" are basically zero: you simply won't get hired by a place that needs you to have those skills. I also really regret that my foreign language education was so limited and that I've not made time to study it before now.
/r/seduction18/03/11 04:45 PM
3

I've skimmed Millionaire Next Door. Don't spend more money than you earn on shit to tell people how rich you are. TA-DA! I actually like 7 habits. It's not mind-blowing; rather, it's a good reminder of things you should be doing to actually get the things you want to get done, done.
/r/seduction18/03/11 04:36 PM
2

If, as you've said in other posts, confidence for you is impossible and you don't have much to brag about, go see a doctor, get the boys chopped off, and get thee to the nearest monastery. You'll never find anyone who's not horribly damaged and willing to settle for anything, and that's a situation you don't want to be in. Or, if you're willing to admit that there might be hope for you... You're looking at it wrong. It's not about the "nice guy"/"douche" axis. Also, if you're expecting "chivalry…
/r/seduction07/03/11 09:25 PM
3

I came here to say "write kallisti on a cocktail napkin and see who picks it up", but I'm pleased to gave been beaten to the punch.
/r/seduction22/01/11 01:27 PM
1

Gotcha!
/r/seduction18/01/11 06:12 PM
0

in which case I'd probably do the same thing. You would interrupt a conversation you were having face-to-face to have an idle conversation with someone else, out of the blue, that the person standing right next to you can't participate in? That's not about being on a "date"; that's about basic respect for another person.
/r/seduction14/01/11 06:41 PM
1

I don't put up with this from my friends; I can't imagine tolerating it from a romantic interest. You find something better to do. She's just abruptly cut off your conversation and entered one that you can't participate in; it's a serious dick move. Go take a walk, get a drink, chat up other folks, guys, gals, whoever. Let her come looking for you, or at least make her wait before you wander back to find her. The sad thing is, I'd like to agree with cheddarchexmix below that it's an IOD, but I f…
/r/seduction14/01/11 06:37 PM
2

Not to be confused with a one-eyed, black Scotsman with the stagger of a much drunker man.
/r/seduction10/01/11 04:40 PM
1

once you get their number, Usually a number comes in a context, which dictates when you would call her. If a number is fairly context-free (e.g., gotten with a question like "hey, what's your number; we should hang out"), there's no "right time" to call. Obviously, it shouldn't be too long—she gave you her number so that you could call her—but there's nothing inherently desperate about calling soon after you get her number. If there's a show that you see coming up later in the week that you want…
/r/seduction28/12/10 10:12 PM
0

I do feel like I've become...independent and self-sustaining my brain starts to chase itself with fears that i need to "not fuck this up" and do anything i can to keep her from leaving. Doesn't sound very independent and self-sustaining to me. You're not looking for a gal whose company you enjoy, you're looking to cram anyone who'll take you and who's above a certain quality threshold into a box labeled "relationship". Any reasonably perceptive gal will walk away from this, and rightly so, becau…
/r/seduction23/12/10 06:51 PM
3

That mindset is an awesome way to end up either a) an asshole or b) whipped. I've seen a number of guys on here talk about "not wanting relationships". They're thinking about it wrong, and unfortunately, most of the PUA literature I've seen doesn't address much beyond getting to the first hookup. For anything other than a one-night stand, you are establishing a relationship with someone. You should have in mind what kinds of relationships you're willing to enter into with this person, and make s…
/r/seduction13/12/10 11:28 PM
1

A sincere and thoughtful compliment is generally a good way to build a rapport with anyone.
/r/seduction06/12/10 11:01 PM
0

Sure, if the compliment is honest. That way you don't look like someone who's lying to them just to get into their pants when they ask you why they're interesting to you.
/r/seduction06/12/10 10:17 PM
1

The way he's portraying it? Yeah. The guy in 5 is just being a dick. The surest way to get people to like you and take an interest in you is for them to believe you give a rat's ass about them. He's also shooting himself in the foot: by refusing to take part in the conversation with everyone else when he's not the center of it, he's ensuring that you remain the anchor! As for the "rich Jewish clique" in 8...they've obviously got their own thing going, if there's a number of them and their "hotti…
/r/seduction02/12/10 07:39 PM
2

This is one of those guys who hasn't figured out the difference between "alpha" and "asshole". Needing to be the one always running the conversation (4a), one-upsmanship (4b), degrading people (8), and trying to be too cool to care (5,8) are big signs of insecurity. People may let you get away with it because they don't feel like trying to "out-alpha" you, but it's not going to get you many friends or warm bodies in your bed.
/r/seduction02/12/10 06:51 PM
3

tl;dr: It's cool to be a nice guy, as long as you're not being a supplicant or a doormat.
/r/seduction02/12/10 06:10 PM
3

You can try to get her to expand on that: "Tell me what you miss about me. ;-)" That will get them thinking about why they like you and provide a nice intro for a fun chat. and/or: Let them know that you feel the same, but avoid the boring and stupidly mushy "awww I miss you too" gaaaaack. Build some anticipation for when you get together next: "You know what I miss? I miss the way you look in those cute little jeans of yours. I'm looking forward to seeing you in them tomorrow. And out of them."…
/r/seduction26/11/10 08:45 PM
7

Playfully! "Oh yeah? What do you miss about me? ;-)"
/r/seduction26/11/10 08:36 PM
9

Make sure that you've warmed up first. Take hold of them firmly so that you can maintain control. Don't sink too low. Move smoothly and continuously; you're not jerking. It's a good idea to have a buddy help you out. You may need to try different weights. And, most importantly: put the girl back on the rack when you're done so that other people can pick her up.
/r/seduction26/11/10 01:35 PM
1

Is there a lot of carpet in Hawaii?
/r/seduction26/11/10 01:31 PM
2

You're right; your friends are daft. Find something interesting that you want to go to this weekend, and ask her to join you. Done and done.
/r/seduction16/11/10 05:04 AM
5

Thanks. And if I could offer a couple more bits of advice... You've gotta relax with this "I MUST BE IN CONTROL" line of thinking. (It seems to be unfortunately common here.) People have calendars. Having to find a date that fits both your schedules is not going to "lower your perceived value" or whatever the current hep term is. Yes, most women seem to like guys to take initiative, and not being assertive or confident is gonna be a big turnoff. You should always be ready, able, and willing to t…
/r/seduction15/11/10 07:44 PM
1

I personally over-analyze things just enough. Razzing aside, I think you're doing it because you care too much about what's going on in her head. Worry about the results, not her motivations. What you know: she didn't want to meet up with you when you were later than expected for a date. That's not shocking. Then, you proposed a date. She gave an excuse for not accepting, but bantered with you for a while and counterproposed a date. She's apparently still interested, so set a date for next week.…
/r/seduction15/11/10 07:14 PM
-1

Not the best move, but...you're in it now. I'd make light of her nervousness. Big old shit-eating grin that says "I know exactly why you're freaked out" while you play dumb: "Gee, what's got you ruffled?" She's gotta know that you know that she knows that you like her (follow that indirection!) Play with her; make it a joke.
/r/seduction12/11/10 04:41 AM
2

I went up to a girl I found attractive and tried to strike up some small talk about the band that was playing So you opened a conversation; that's good. Did you have something particularly interesting and engaging to discuss about the band, or were you just filling time? Look at it from the chatee's perspective for a second. Do you like making conversation with people who don't have anything particularly interesting to say? Also: some jerk came over to her and said How did he even get her attent…
/r/seduction08/11/10 03:41 PM
4

I told him that I loved sex... ...isn't that kind of like saying "I'm a fan of breathing?" I don't think that's particularly unfortunate, just a bit vapid, which I'm pretty sure we're all guilty of after a couple of drinks. Is he trying to get me to familiarise myself with his place so he can take me back later? Sounds to me like he's trying to take you there immediately. :-) My first thought would be to counter-propose meeting up elsewhere. Have a chance to warm-up to each other, get a couple o…
/r/seduction08/11/10 03:29 PM
4

It's not a matter of "not having a relationship", it's a matter of "what kind of relationship do you want to have?" NSA hookup-buddy? FWB? Casual dating? The more intimate of a relationship you're willing to have, the longer you're likely to be able to make it last. Just figure out where your boundaries are and be clear with your potential partner.
/r/seduction03/11/10 02:33 PM
1

she'll have her arms around you, full on, making all sorts of excuses to be close to you, for example to take loads of pics of you two. If she's flirting, especially by making body contact, match it. If she's been putting her arms around you, you've got every reason to think that you should respond in kind and try to escalate a little. If she doesn't go along with it, she's playing games: either she's not interested and just wants validation or she is but she wants to play with you. Either way, …
/r/seduction02/11/10 04:30 PM
1

Would you be interested in having drinks with her anyway (i.e., are you interested in pursuing a non-romantic friendship)? If so, extend invites to her (and any boy that she wants to bring) to events that you and others (not you alone) are going to, like you would a dude who seems cool that you might want to hang out with. If not, a "drat :-)" would be a fine response. You've been beaten for the moment, acknowledge it and take it with good humor and confidence. That also gives her a little ego b…
/r/seduction28/10/10 11:15 PM
1

I'm flattered, but I suspect that I'm not your type.
/r/seduction25/10/10 01:34 AM
4

Is there a context for this that makes this an interesting or surprising result? Don't most people like going out for drinks?
/r/seduction22/10/10 04:27 PM
1

I was just wearing the deodorant.
/r/seduction06/10/10 01:06 PM
1

Every honey bee fills with jealousy when they see you out with the man your man could smell like
/r/seduction05/10/10 07:29 PM
12

I actually got an unsolicited "You smell great! What cologne is that?" this weekend from a gal I was dancing blues with. What was I wearing? ...Old Spice Swagger deodorant. Not even kidding. Apparently, Isaiah Mustafa speaks the truth.
/r/seduction04/10/10 10:02 PM
1

d'_'b
/r/seduction28/09/10 11:02 PM
2

It's more than complementary, which is what I'm driving at. Much like focusing on acting a certain way can actually make that natural after a time, giving yourself external reasons to be confident is an excellent tool for becoming confident. It doesn't mean that you'll continue to need them.
/r/seduction28/09/10 10:09 PM
2

If you're attractive and talented, it gives you something to be confident about.
/r/seduction28/09/10 09:23 PM
2

I would also recommend becoming intensely attractive, having a melodious, basso voice, and being pre-Scientology Issac Hayes.
/r/seduction28/09/10 02:13 PM
10

But, hey, free purse.
/r/seduction21/08/10 05:28 PM
19

I put on my robe and wizard hat.
/r/seduction19/08/10 04:36 PM
2

"Indeed I am! But you, my dear, are drunk, and in the morning, I'll be sober."
/r/seduction18/08/10 01:43 PM
2

I feel she's trying to take over the reins. Do you like where the buggy ride is going? If she's got good ideas, roll with it. Just make sure that you've always got a plan of your own ready and have the balls to counter-propose it if she wants to go to the local menstruation and chocolate party or something.
/r/seduction10/08/10 07:55 PM
6

I don't know what "PUA logic" is or how it differs from real logic, but given that she hasn't tried to get him to do something unpleasant to be with her, I don't think that she's trying to test you. It sounds like she has an idea of what she wants. That isn't so bad at all. I think that PUA logic would say that she should think the activity is more important to you, and really, it probably should be. Right. Because, y'know, he's just interested in getting coffee/going to the cinema/etc. and it's…
/r/seduction10/08/10 07:48 PM
1

No problem. :-) You hit it on the head: you have to make that opportunity! "Mixed signals" doesn't mean anything. She's giving you IOI's. You apparently like her. It's time for science now, baby: put that hypothesis to the test. Get some time alone with her, turn on the body language, build some tension, keep things escalating, and kiss her. She'll go with it or not; either way, you've got some results. Again, just be ready for the "she goes with it, then is all 'no, no, I shouldn't'" drama. You…
/r/seduction28/07/10 07:07 PM
6

she just couldn't date me because she doesn't date friends (we have quite a few mutual friends) because she has seen situations like this end horribly. Bull. Shit. She wouldn't say that unless she was attracted to you and doing a shit job of talking herself out of it. First off: your goal is wrong. You can't "get into an LTR". You take something from being friends into something more. Maybe it turns into an LTR, maybe not. What you want is to see where it goes. What have you been waiting for? If…
/r/seduction28/07/10 12:32 AM
4

There are TRUE alpha men out there. ... leaders of men, the rich and powerful, sports figures etc. ...and they got that way how? You can absolutely learn and practice the social skills necessary to meet and make positive impressions on people of both genders, whether aimed at getting them into bed or not. AFAICT, the big difference between "alphas" and "betas" is confidence and a the willingness to be an interesting person. They start to feel the increase demand and as such mentally up their sel…
/r/seduction23/07/10 02:11 PM
2

I found that taking up social dancing gave me a lot of practice in opening conversations with people.
/r/seduction24/06/10 01:55 PM
-2

Chicks really dig these hats.
/r/seduction15/06/10 03:38 PM
13

I'd suggest subtracting them from π/2, or 90 if you swing that way.
/r/seduction15/06/10 03:12 PM
2

First thought: quit hanging out with douchebags. Second thought: ignore it. It's the twenty- and thirty-something version of junior high's "assphinctersayswhat?" Just make like he didn't say anything at all. You've got your own agenda, yes? If you're walking into a group, take in the group as a whole (i.e., don't just look at the AMOG) with a look and greet all of them ("hey guys, how's it going", or something similar). This does two things: it highlights the AMOG's juvenile behavior and it give…
/r/seduction30/04/10 09:17 PM
1

I'll be here all week. Tip the veal and remember to try your waitress.
/r/seduction31/03/10 05:13 PM
2

serves only to confirm people's notions that seddit is full of creepy perverts with women issues. The irony of your stereotyping a group based on a single member's characterization of modern "feminism" is delicious. 'course, that's the kind of reasoning I'd expect from a chick. ;-)
/r/seduction31/03/10 04:52 PM
1

I think pick up artist/ NLP/ whatever guys are creepy and I don't like them I suspect that you mean that you don't like the ones that you can tell are employing PUA techniques, which basically means, "the ones who do it poorly".
/r/seduction14/03/10 08:56 PM
2

Right. Don't read the stuff other people write or try to figure out what works for other people or doesn't. Spend lots and lots of time making mistakes on your own. Then you'll have the life experience of having made lots of mistakes.
/r/seduction26/02/10 05:33 PM
2

Write ΚΑΛΛΊΣΤῌ on a cocktail napkin, hold it out, and see who takes it.
/r/seduction12/02/10 09:06 PM
6

Unless he's hot.
/r/seduction09/02/10 10:14 PM
8

So it's cool when the guy whose shoulder you squeezed opens a conversation, but not when a guy comes into the bar and opens a conversation with you? Riiight.
/r/seduction09/02/10 09:22 PM
2

Being physically fit will make you more energetic, more confident, healthier, better-looking, and generally a more desirable person to be around. So, yes, hit the gym or otherwise find a way to keep in shape.
/r/seduction08/02/10 05:22 PM
8

I take it your grandmother was not an English teacher.
/r/seduction04/02/10 07:10 PM
2

The end goal is knowing and accepting who you are and what you want. That eliminates social pathologies (validation-seeking behavior, irrational nervousness, etc.) and makes it clear to people why you're a fun person to be around.
/r/seduction22/01/10 03:55 PM
9

I want THAT FISH and damn you if you'll tell me to not try because it may end in failure. Actually, one of the basic points of any PUA-type advice is going to be that you absolutely should try, know that it might end in failure, and accept that if it does, rather than wasting your time and doing damage to yourself in the process.
/r/seduction14/01/10 07:06 PM
6

You will actually look more interesting and appealing to the guy if he knows that you are preoccupied with other activities rather than have nothing to do but to be with him the whole time. This is a serious understatement. A better one would be: "You will continue to be an interesting person if you keep living your own life. If you don't, you won't." "Being in a relationship" is not an activity. Men may look at women who are into make-ups and clothes. However, these women are not their type whe…
/r/seduction10/01/10 11:01 PM
2

Yeesh. This should be taught to everyone over the age of five. This isn't a guide to how to talk to women; it's conversational openers for making small talk with anyone, no matter what your goal. These are just as valid if you walk into a bar full of people you don't know and want to make some new aquaintances.
/r/seduction10/01/10 06:36 AM
1

I talk like that. "...the English language had deteriorated into a hybrid of hillbilly, valleygirl, inner-city slang and various grunts. Joe was able to understand them, but when he spoke in an ordinary voice he sounded pompous and faggy to them."
/r/seduction06/11/09 03:26 PM
1

As I said, I plan to pick up The Game in the near future; however, I'm currently reading through the hot, steamy, and sexy text that is The Mythical Man-Month (I can't believe I'm just now reading it...yeesh). What the "seduction community" is all about is right there in the name. Yes, I'm aware that there's a common parlance, respected literature, and frequently-used techniques, as there are in any community of practitioners of any art. However, the goal is not slavish adherence to any particul…
/r/seduction05/11/09 09:33 PM
1

Aside from, for example, here: and seemingly doesn't even seem to have a good idea what the seduction community is all about which is a claim that I've not engaged in the kinds of relationships that the "seduction community" aims for.
/r/seduction05/11/09 09:00 PM
1

Heh. Absolutely nothing wrong with taking some time for yourself! What other things have interested you in life outside of skateboarding and the punk scene? It sounds like you could use a change of scenery outside of just the dating scene.
/r/seduction05/11/09 08:16 PM
1

you keep bringing up your relationship history. No, actually, I don't, which is my point. You've made assumptions about it. the bottom line is that i don't value your opinion because you discourage people when they should be encouraged to keep on going. I'm encouraging people to do things that work for them. Shocking, I know.
/r/seduction05/11/09 08:12 PM
1

The Game is the book when talking about seduction. Believe it or not, seduction existed prior to 2005. Also, please note that the description for r/seduction is '"A subreddit dedicated to dating, and getting the girls.", not "a place to perform catechesis based on the texts of Neil Strauss." being able to get a gf isn't the same as knowing the structure that is used in the community Yes, I'm well aware that being able to get a girlfriend is not the same as pickup. I don't like you discouraging n…
/r/seduction05/11/09 08:10 PM
1

You know nothing about my workout goals or relationship history. I really don't care about the value someone who makes unwarranted assumptions based on zero data places on my opinions. :-)
/r/seduction05/11/09 07:37 PM
1

WTF? Emergency? That's a survival book. It has nothing to do with seduction. I didn't claim that it did. You asserted that I hadn't heard of Neil Strauss. As I said, I read Emergency, and The Game is on my list. I'm well aware of who Neil Strauss is. To me it sounds like the guy barely set foot into the wilderness. I would hate for him to turn tail just because of your discouragement. I'm encouraging him to try to find things that work for him. It sounds like one particular exercise in a book is…
/r/seduction05/11/09 07:35 PM
1

In short bursts? Yes. It takes a bit of discipline to be like "I'm going to stop working, pry myself out of my seat, and haul my butt down to the gym" on some days. In the long term? No. The only reason I apply that discipline in short timeframes is because I know that I'll be happy as a result of it. I don't have to "discipline" myself to keep a regular schedule at the gym; I go when I can, and I try to make time to do so, because I know I'll enjoy the short- and long-term results. I don't worr…
/r/seduction05/11/09 07:18 PM
1

if you skip one day then what is keeping you from skipping another just because it is too hard? Sorry for the double-reply, but I really wanted to address this on a broader level. If skipping one day makes you likely to skip another, I'd wonder if you're thinking enough about why you're doing what you're doing. It's like going to the gym; if you're doing it because you feel like you have to and you're trying to get by on discipline alone, you're gonna fall off that horse eventually and not get b…
/r/seduction05/11/09 03:51 PM
1

I've read Emergency, and haven't gotten around to The Game yet, though it's on my list. Apparently not all the tasks are "very do-able" for tommyschoolbruh. I'm just trying to encourage him not to lose the forest for the trees. If your goal is to push your social abilities, and one particular exercise isn't working well for you, why would you keep banging your head against that one exercise rather than trying a different one? And as for whether or not I've heard of Neil Strauss...what does that …
/r/seduction05/11/09 03:46 PM
1

In that case, why not just move on to a new "quest" and try this one again later if it still interests you? Or devise your own?
/r/seduction05/11/09 03:28 PM
1

I hear you on the "normal" nightclubs scene. I've been out to one once since I moved to NYC, and that was to support my roommate who had just taken a job as a promoter for it. You're right, though; it couldn't hurt to suck it up and try going to a few. However, I suspect there are other communities you can explore, meet new people, and try new things to boot. I've found social dancing, in particular swing, to be a great way to meet people. Or on a broader scope...if you're feeling like you're ju…
/r/seduction05/11/09 03:24 PM
1

if you skip one day then what is keeping you from skipping another just because it is too hard? If a plan is hard and it's not clear what you're going to get out of it, seems to me the smart move is to find a new plan. What exactly are you hoping to get out of this quest? What are you finding difficult about it, asking for phone numbers, or asking for advice on a clothing store?
/r/seduction04/11/09 10:39 PM
1

A man walks into a doctor's office and says, "doctor, it hurts when I do this." The doctor says... :-) Unless you're looking for sense of personal satisfaction from completing the "missions" in a book, if a quest isn't providing you something useful, I'd say skip it. What are you looking to get out of such a "quest"? As for the difficulties of being in the suburbs...do you know why Willie Sutton robbed banks? :-) If you're looking to meet single people, go to where the single people are. Mind if…
/r/seduction04/11/09 10:15 PM
2

There's no "quest" to get a number; I'm guessing this is where your anxiety is coming from. If you go up, talk to someone, and hit it off, at the end of the evening (with any luck, after a change of venue or two), the only natural thing to do is ask for their number so you can call them. Think about it this way: if you bumped into a dude at a bar, he seemed pretty cool, you shot the shit for a while, and he was like "gotta go", it'd be perfectly normal to be like "hey, what's your number, I'll c…
/r/seduction04/11/09 09:21 PM
7

Unless you're hideously deformed, what you've done with what you have counts for far more than what you started with. A man who took a couple of whacks from the ugly stick but dresses well, keeps in shape, and walks and talks with confidence isn't going to have a problem meeting folks.
/r/seduction02/11/09 07:06 PM
3

Prolonged eye contact is the most powerful bit of body language you can use. Physical contact helps a lot too once you've broken the ice a bit. That said, if you're trying to develop something between you, there shouldn't be a question in her mind that you're interested. If you're engaging her personally, telling her what you like about her, dancing with her, trying to find out more about her, asking her if she wants to go with you wherever you're going next (you do have a change of venue in min…
/r/seduction01/11/09 09:54 PM
3

I don't really get "angry" or "bitter" from his stuff, just pragmatic.
/r/seduction19/10/09 03:33 AM
15

Cut her in two and count the rings.
/r/seduction21/08/09 02:48 AM
7

If there's a way I can stand nearby without being creepy, I'll jump in to conversations if i feel like there's an opening. Moreover, I find that observations about what's going on around you tend to be good conversation starters. Another way to think about this is: how would you integrate yourself into a bunch of dudes that seemed cool? More often than not, the same strategies work fine.
/r/seduction25/07/09 08:50 PM
1

Broadly: go anywhere people are and look for an opportunity to open a line of conversation, particularly with an individual or (more likely) a group of two or three people. Find a natural opening line, perhaps based on what's going on around you. Start talking. Bars Keep an eye on the folks standing around to see if any of them are leaving enough room for someone else to join them in a conversation. Sporting events Sit down next to people who aren't already whooping it up with their buddies. Or …
/r/seduction03/10/08 01:56 PM
3

'Meeting a lot of people is key,' Mr Robinson said. 'Sitting there moping and eating chocolate is not going to get you anywhere.' Obvious...yet often overlooked, I suspect.
/r/seduction02/10/08 07:35 PM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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