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torquesteer Archive

View 13 posts and 191 comments by torquesteer on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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6

That's amazing, thanks for for sharing. And you're absolutely right, the only real opportunities are the ones you create for yourself. Lots of guys sit around and wait for it to happen, but when you take the initiative, you realize that the world is most static until you do something about it. I'm glad my article helped, if ever so slightly, and hopefully my future writings will help accelerate this process for you!
/r/seduction22/01/15 06:19 AM
6

Thanks. How do you feel?
/r/seduction21/01/15 11:48 PM
3

So as always, I'll find blame on someone else. In this case, my wingman and partner, Andrian, for not correcting them! Haha just kidding. Good point and thanks for reading. Will be better next time!
/r/seduction21/01/15 05:09 PM
19

Hi, author here. As many people who have experienced this phenomenon will tell you, it's very puzzling at first. Imagine that you expressed interest in a girl, and she declines for whatever reason. For most guys, this is the end and we move on. However, sometimes, the same girl comes back and starts to flirt with us. So we think that... "ok, that's where the friendzone starts, since the sexual tension is gone now that I've been rejected". But you start to find out that she's initiating and is ac…
/r/seduction21/01/15 04:31 PM
13

Good post. I could argue that all your dates should be cheap, since expensive places tend to put too much pressure on her and might make you look too try-hard.
/r/seduction12/11/14 03:16 PM
1

Really guys, don't get caught up with the money. A bit of investment is required but it's more a matter of time than money. It's what you participate in rather than what you have. In fact, unless you want a woman who wants to settle down (gold diggers included), the less flashy you are, the better. The key is to exude a healthy and fulfilling lifestyle, not to brag.
/r/seduction15/10/14 10:11 PM
1

I used to tell people that my ambition in life is to one day be ambitious. It's just a joke, of course, but there is a seed of truth in this. The desire to stand out is enough for me to stand out in the crowd. Other than that, I'm inspired by Bill Maher to think critically through humor. I like writing since no one can interrupt my train of thought. I like fast cars and fast bikes since they put me into flow and a state of sublime living.
/r/seduction15/10/14 02:40 PM
42

I'm just gonna come out cold and say it, please don't take it the wrong way. Stop blaming the girls for being crazy, flaky, or xyz-reason-you-may-have. Start taking responsibility over what you can control and start working on them. I'm never nervous Did you know that a little nervousness is actually a good thing? It signals your mind to be congruent and consider the social situation you're in. If you don't have a natural mechanism for this, just think of a few things to checklist to make sure y…
/r/seduction14/10/14 11:47 PM
6

Thanks for reading anyway. Anything else you could add on why you think it's bogus? It'd help me out a lot. I'd also like to add that living your life should not be considered the same as crafting your image to others, since their experiences shape their perception of you. However, there are factors you can control when you project your identity to others, and you should be aware of them. It's not to say that you are manipulative about it, just that the correct and congruent aspect of your image…
/r/seduction14/10/14 06:43 PM
1

Thanks for slogging through it. I was kinda afraid that a lot of it seemed like intellectualization instead of practical info. But the more and more I applied it, the more true it seemed to me. So I don't think it's just wordy for wordiness' sake, but actual information backed up by some sort of logic backed up by some sort of science. One can always say, here are a few tips and advices, go out there and just do that. To me, it's much more helpful for a guy to understand why he's doing a certain…
/r/seduction26/09/14 02:49 AM
2

It's really hard to describe the feeling that I don't consider hot girls to be any more special than the guy chugging a beer next to me. Sure, there's a bit of anxiety in me, but when it flares up, that's just my signal to be more congruent. I enter flow when I want to do something with them, not when I want to possess them. I'd suggest that when you go out, forget about confidence for a while. Just imagine that it's your first day in kindergarden and you're about to meet your best friend for li…
/r/seduction26/09/14 12:16 AM
2

Thanks for reading it at least! Most people probably looks at its size and skip onto cat pictures. I actually have the practical advices in part 2, so stay tuned for that. I'd question your assertion that you feel like you need anything, including confidence, to be in flow and approach naturally. This kind of thinking leads to a lack of confidence in the first place.
/r/seduction25/09/14 10:34 PM
1

Hey thanks, and I know what you mean. Just realize that when you're just there in the crowd, you're just floating around. And when you see a hottie, you have to try to gather some momentum to make a move. It's better to take an active approach to your game. This means coming up with an objective and find a way to fulfill it. Over time, you will fine tune your objective and method to be more realistic. I'm not saying that this will get you the hottie you want. But it means that you're more likely…
/r/seduction25/09/14 10:29 PM
2

Yeah, absolutely agreed with you here. The act of evaluating whether you're being needy or not is in itself a needy behavior, even though we all have to do it from time to time. The realization isn't that it can be perceived as needy, but finding ways to do it (or to express it) in a less needy way. Most of the time, that means clarifying your intentions within yourself first, then carry out the course of action in the most honest way possible.
/r/seduction18/09/14 08:27 PM
5

RSD was started by Tyler after he left Mystery and his group (somewhat due to the backlash that the book the Game and the TV show generated). RSD focuses on the social aspect of the game rather than the technical aspects (if there were any). In a nutshell, instead of moves and lines, they move onto emotions and vibes.
/r/seduction17/09/14 03:10 PM
4

You'd be surprised! I mean, doesn't it annoy you when people ask when you're free? It annoys me. If you wanted to hang out, just tell me the place and the time. If I'm interested, I'll say yes. If not, I'll say maybe or just plain no. This is just people dynamics, forget alpha or whatever. But to the point of man saying it to a woman, he better be leading. That means to put himself in a situation where he could be refused.
/r/seduction08/09/14 09:10 PM
4

I don't see him changing to the alpha approach. Instead of waiting for approval, he just puts his preferred place and time, inviting rejection.
/r/seduction08/09/14 08:39 PM
1

Because they cared more about impressing their date than determining compatibility. That's precisely it. We spend an intense amount of psychic energy trying to make the wrong person into the right person instead of using that energy to find the right person instead. When that happens, there is no trying to impress or even impressing at all. You just hook up and have a good time.
/r/seduction20/08/14 08:41 PM
4

It's a good article, but I think it's slightly mis-titled. The title should be "the importance of expressing yourself". You're right in that she's only interested in you if she can relate to you. You do this by expressing yourself truly (and not care about what opinion others may hold about you). Otherwise, I'd recommend that you don't sell yourself like a salesman would because: People with high value don't need to demonstrate high value Intimacy is not a transaction You will enter a bidding wa…
/r/seduction20/08/14 04:55 PM
1

Joking aside, I think most good looking guys I've met are shy and suck at game though. They're so used to getting external validation that they shrink like a flan in a cupboard when they don't get it. I don't think of them as naturals. Naturals are people who don't seem to have any socially-conditioned neediness that we all work hard to get rid of. They can just be at ease with beautiful women at all times.
/r/seduction19/08/14 03:56 PM
3

Yeah, you get rid of stress by dealing with the things that cause it. Those things might be real or imaginary, but you don't know until you deal with it. You see some shady characters as you walk downtown. You look at them in the eye but in a non-threatening way. You'll realize that either: a) These people are not that shady, they just dress differently than what you're used to. Your brain's bias probably interpreted that as being threatening. Or, b) Oh yeah these people are up to no good, but I…
/r/seduction08/08/14 02:15 PM
6

Hello, author here. I'll be glad to answer any question. One thing I want to clarify: I'm not advocating that you should rationalize with your feelings when you are out. I'm saying, in a nutshell, that you should be more aware of your impulses but don't attempt to repress or contribute to them. Just knowing how to "snap out of it" is often good enough. If you download the Action Plan PDF, it'll give you more info on how to make this mental exercise a long term deal. Thanks!
/r/seduction07/08/14 05:13 PM
3

I don't subscribe to any pill theory, but I found the book to be the most thorough and based on life experiences over different cultures. A lot of people struggle with the rights and wrongs of what attracts women AND leading the life you want to. The answer that I've found and validated by the book is that it matters very little what people think about you. It's how you think about yourself that matters, and you can't do this without being profoundly honest with yourself. If you're wondering, th…
/r/PurplePillDebate30/07/14 10:22 PM
77

I'm just laughing my ass off sitting here imagining that Thai girls probably have a forum where they discuss pick-up techniques and how many WG6 (White Guy 6-foot) they've bagged.
/r/seduction28/07/14 09:56 PM
2

Yeah, you've pretty got it. It's important to separate being invested from desiring someone. The quick trick is that when you are invested, you expect some return on investment, so you are butthurt when you get nothing or little at all. When you show desire, it's a gift, and you give it without any expectations. In the latter part of his life, he was giving away his desire and physical presents to those that he thought truly deserved it. Those that he pursued and showed a penchant for grace and …
/r/seduction21/07/14 11:15 PM
7

Yeah, a lot of poop thrown by both sides, though it's mostly one-sided. Lost in all this are these topics: True confidence Source of neediness and how to reduce it Evolutionary tendencies still existing within us Emotional investment I will disagree with one point: A healthy human being doesn't use sexual strategy A healthy human being accepts that sexual strategy is part of life. They also need to know how to manufacture and maintain attraction and desire.
/r/PurplePillDebate01/07/14 01:49 AM
2

You should reconsider your question. Like he said, it's not a technique so it doesn't matter if it "works" or not. Just practice that habit of sharing yourself and your desires shamelessly. It attracts the type of women you want to be with, regardless of age.
/r/seduction20/06/14 01:40 AM
1

I wonder if I'll like her.
/r/seduction13/06/14 05:08 AM
2

Yes, I'd recommend his book (Models) as the place to start! Below are the books that I find are free of BS: The Evolution of Desire - A bit dry and sciency, but it sets the stage for explaining why we do what we do. Ultimately, sex and intimacy are neutral concepts meant for us to find the best mate to share ourselves with. Forget what the media and culture says, you will have the best feelings when you find somebody who is compatible with you sexually. No More Mr. Nice Guy - I haven't reread th…
/r/seduction11/06/14 02:33 PM
2

Yeah, there are 2 ways you can make it okay: 1.) Accept it as normal, then they'll think it's normal (and not awkward). 2.) Exaggerate the reaction, that way they'll think it's ridiculous to consider it awkward.
/r/seduction09/06/14 10:05 PM
3

Hey guys, just as a heads up, I've teamed up with Andrian on this site. I know many of you have found my posts and comments helpful before, so I'm hoping to do it more in a structured format. I'll be happy to answer any question. Your feedback is also appreciated. Thanks.
/r/seduction09/06/14 06:55 PM
4

Hey, no problem. To answer your questions: 1.) It doesn't sound like that at all. My first few times were just senseless pounding away. It's very rare for a young guy to associate sex with intimacy, even if he tries. The media and culture just primes us to be like that. I notice that the only difference were in the parents. I wouldn't focus on it too much. It's what you do in the future that matters, and you may pass it on to your children also. 2.) Sure. You should think of intimate desire as a…
/r/seduction09/06/14 01:09 PM
8

Hey I saw this earlier at work and I wanted to reply but I couldn't since there were too many people around. I hope you get to see it. Apart of the "me too" replies, I'm gonna give you a different perspective. One could argue that if you want anything from her other than deep deep intimacy, it could be seen as neediness. To take it further, sex is the deepest form of intimacy there is. You'll have to stick with me on this, but I'll take you through it. 1.) Change your mind about sex. Porn and ma…
/r/seduction06/06/14 05:53 AM
6

This is it right here. I mean, I can go on and on about demographics and mechanics, but it comes down to your truth. Though it seems nebulous, the concept boils down to this: there is some insincerity she is detecting within you, and she's running away because of it. If there is anything to work on, I'd say it'd be finding what your values and boundaries are. Once you figured them out, it's your reaction to the rejection that creates attraction. If you see it as another stepping stone in your jo…
/r/seduction02/06/14 05:39 AM
1

The neediness sure finds a way to creep back in if you're not keeping yourself comfortable in vulnerable positions often. If you are, I find that even though there are peaks and valleys, the average typically inches up over time.
/r/seduction01/06/14 05:10 AM
3

Do you have both /u/theonlyuser and /u/readonlyuser? Anyway, it sounds like you already know how to talk to women, looks like George Clooney, and has the charms of Robert Redford. However, not a lot of people here do, so please don't beat the rhetoric drums of "with confidence you can do anything" or "as long as you say the right thing, it doesn't matter". Orientation matters, it dictates her perception and reaction. Sure, a really really smooth line may allay fear, but why start out in the hole…
/r/seduction27/05/14 05:32 AM
5

From the front, you are giving her an invitation. From the side, you tend to be seen as a beggar. From back, you are an assailant. I'm sorry but that's just how girls are programmed to think. Have you ever walked behind one at night? Is she always looking back like you're some rapist? Scratch that, it's how people are programmed. When was the last time someone tapped you on the back? Were you expecting trouble or an invitation? It comes down to orientation and vulnerability. When the orientation…
/r/seduction27/05/14 05:24 AM
26

It also means directly in front of them, guys. Never approach from the back, avoid doing from the side as much as possible. If you have to, walk all the way around and do it straight on. You might have to overcome physical obstacles, so just plan your path and stick to it.
/r/seduction26/05/14 08:40 AM
1

PM me.
/r/seduction01/05/14 07:42 AM
1

Exactly, the over-analysis and waiting for an IOI (or AI or whatever) is the very definition of neediness (since... hello... you are needing her attention and approval before you can take action).
/r/seduction30/04/14 05:26 PM
8

Sorry, nice article, but you never need an invitation to approach. Imagine a guy standing there trying to analyze every action and interpreting if it's a sign vs a guy who just walks up and says hi. Who is more attractive? Who is more needy? You don't need an invitation and there will never be one. Stop looking for one.
/r/seduction30/04/14 04:27 AM
3

Thanks very much for your feedback. Means more to me than upvotes. I'll continue to contribute more in the future!
/r/seduction30/04/14 01:05 AM
17

It's much deeper than that. This is not simply technique A vs. technique B. For reference, Mystery attempted suicide a few times, so that should put things into context. I'm going to refer to the Game as seduction, and Models as seeking the truth, or non-seduction. Seduction itself is a concept that you have to deceive and manipulate to get what you want. It comes from the latin word seducere which means to lead someone astray. You are essentially separating someone from their reality. So when y…
/r/seduction28/04/14 02:45 PM
2

I wish I could take credit but it's from Johnny Cooper: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K0x0WlGXFfA
/r/seduction28/04/14 12:44 AM
6

That's freaking awesome, sexy guy! Manson, Owen, and just about anybody will tell you that solo is the way to go. The matter of fact is that you don't need anybody to provide you social proof. You can hit it straight up. Go to bars alone. Talk to everybody, find the girl who's interested. Everything else is just baggage. More on eye contact: use it as a rapier to draw blood, then move in with a knife to finish. My favorite line: "hey did we just have a connection there?" It's a very polarizing l…
/r/seduction27/04/14 11:23 PM
1

Because it shows that you are socially connected, dynamic, and self-aware on another level. Again, I have to stress the point that you're not apologizing for anything. You're just acknowledging it in a sort of veneer and humorous way. But it's pretty clear at this point that we're just agreeing to disagree.
/r/seduction27/04/14 08:19 PM
4

Well, hidden beneath all this is the fact that people are getting less and less confident (as mentioned in the book Emotional Intelligence) due to the lack of real danger (my conjecture). Once you know fear and how to overcome it, it's as normal and easy as getting up in the morning. But of the hundred of girls I've approached, only a handful were particularly impressed by my initiative. They were impressed by how I was able to carry the conversation with a complete stranger. That says to me tha…
/r/seduction27/04/14 07:54 PM
2

Thanks, Tony. This is obviously for times when you don't know what to say and you feel the need to utter something because you're afraid of silence. My style is the rambling style similar to Eddie Izzard where I'll say a few of those filler words at once. It'd sound something along the line of "sooooo um yeah anyway, the upshot is that I managed to do something I thought I couldn't do". I wouldn't recommend it to anyone, but the rambling-on style is a great to put everyone at ease where you're c…
/r/seduction26/04/14 11:59 PM
1

Being meta is verbal self awareness, not self-conscious. I'm acknowledging something about myself or what I said and accepting it. Okay, here's an example. Me: oh hey you're all made up, I couldn't recognize you at first Her: yeah, I usually don't put on this much make up, how do I look? Me: good, it's definitely working Her: Ummmm... Me: D'oh, that sounded better in my head, definitely didn't come out right. You look spectacular, that's what I was trying to say. Her: Oh ok, thanks. See how I wa…
/r/seduction26/04/14 02:48 PM
1

Something that sounds weak actually comes across as strong. Remember, it's what you subcommunicate matters more. By judging her reaction and your words, and be willing to admit to your mistakes, you're saying that you can become congruent as well as responsible. You're not afraid to admit that what you said was not well received. It's only weak if you're trying to qualify yourself. It's strong if you say "yeah that sounded bad, sorry".
/r/seduction25/04/14 09:32 PM
2

FWB can never be targeted, it just happens. There are several things at play that you need to consider: Attraction, Chemistry, and Compatibility: FWB happens most of the time when there is strong Attraction and Chemistry, but little Compatibility. If there is little attraction or chemistry, forget about it. Sex will be slightly worse than no sex. Give that vibrator a chance. You're looking for a special type of human connection, not just sex (most of the time). You go about finding someone and d…
/r/seduction25/04/14 03:14 PM
5

The claw cracks me up every single time. I picture a bear mauling somebody in a club every single time I hear it.
/r/seduction24/04/14 11:21 PM
1

I'd say "no, but I'll leave you alone after you tell me how I can do it better"
/r/seduction24/04/14 11:20 PM
10

Use it as an opportunity to show off how non-needy you are. If they start to annoy you, try to figure out a way to play a joke on them. You can show to the girl that you're not too invested in her attention that you forget about your friends. You can also subtly show that you're the alpha of the group and you can dish as much shit back as you receive it.
/r/seduction23/04/14 03:07 PM
1

Applying stoicism to seduction in the way that these people do is pure genius and I can say for sure that I couldn't have come up with it on my own. No doubt a lot of research and experience went into it. I'm just glad that I'm able to take the concepts and practice it in real life pretty successfully. It's not without its trials and tribulations, but with the right mindset, I'm becoming bolder and bolder with each successive failure.
/r/seduction22/04/14 05:16 AM
3

Yeah, I've read quite a bit from stoic philosophers, including Seneca, Boethius, and Marcus Aurelius. However, my understanding comes from much more recent authors, like Nathaniel Branden and Mark Manson. It's more practical for my understanding. I mean, stoicsm from a life and death standpoint is a little different than from coping with modern living. The concept is pretty much the same, but I can't exactly relate to dudes who were being put to death. Vulnerability and Assertiveness are relativ…
/r/seduction21/04/14 07:47 PM
1

I would argue that your perceived value is the outcome of your path to attain these qualities within yourself. It's not so important what your value actually is (since it's all subjective), but rather what your system of values is. If you have a strong system of how you value things in life, then you would tend to value your things (family, friends, organizations, self) over women. This subcommunicates high status and hence is very attractive to them.
/r/seduction21/04/14 06:36 PM
41

I like where you're going, and I really think you're getting somewhere here. But there is so much more than that. I can go on for days but here's what confidence breaks down to: Awareness. Being more aware of your own thoughts and feelings, and of others' feelings, and the social situation at hand, will allow you to take effective actions. People often mistake being aware with being self-conscious, but they are different. Being self-conscious is your own thoughts judging yourself in a negative m…
/r/seduction21/04/14 06:51 AM
2

I try FaceTime sometimes too. If it turns out that they have an iphone, it's kinda surprising and cute to them. Hell, I've set up dates through fb messages. The point is, don't judge the tools, judge your methods. If she seems very interested, then try something forward and bold. If she's neutral, texting is a good way to establish early connections. But since there is a time lag, it doesn't give you a chance to be dynamic, which is your best weapon.
/r/seduction21/04/14 02:09 AM
4

I think just using it casually is good but don't let it be an alternative to approaching. Here's my shit rolls downhill theory: all the quality girls (looks and sanity) are out there having the time of their lives. Guess where the shitty ones end up? I mean, I'm generalizing here, but the point is made that most girls who go online are fed up with guys in real life. They hope that another channel is going to provide them access to high quality guys at a low low price of nothing. I'm sorry, but j…
/r/seduction18/04/14 08:58 PM
1

How relevant is this quote by Casanova now: "I do not know whether it was by my intellect that I have come so far in life, I do know that it is to it alone that I owe all the happiness I enjoy when I am face to face with myself."
/r/seduction17/04/14 10:07 PM
2

As you probably already know, outcome dependence is highly correlated to neediness, which in turn detracts attraction. But it's more important to understand why you are seeking an outcome rather than just trying to avoid it. There are 2 types of neediness that come from a lack of self-investment: Baseline neediness: In general, there is a lack in your life. You seek validation from others and the opposite sex. The outcome is explicitly tied to this. You want an outcome because it will validate y…
/r/seduction17/04/14 07:19 PM
1

You should read a book called Emotional Intelligence. Seduction is an emotional process instead of just a numbers game with mechanics. I mean, it could be, but she'd be pretty unresponsive or you'd get pretty bored. Try getting in touch with whatever emotion you're feeling and engage her with it amplified. The funny thing about drawing someone out is that you do it but showing your feelings first. Then they are more apt to latch on and share their own emotions with you.
/r/seduction17/04/14 04:37 PM
1

Ooh I like this. Let's have a debate! I say that science has been at it for centuries and they still have no idea what turns a woman on. Newer and newer studies pop up that says women are attracted to X, Y, and Z, only to be debunked. That's because X, Y, and Z are just appearances and behaviors of a truly attractive man, when in reality, it's what he has inside that matters the most. What say you?
/r/seduction16/04/14 05:33 PM
0

Can we get away from this kind of scientific validation, guys? People act differently in lab settings than they do in real life. Then people who tries to pass the research "findings" off as facts (rather than correlation) tries to give anecdotal evidence about their own lives, which has even less context and bearing. For example, flirting is all about rapport and intentions, rather than how and where you touch people. To flirt, you have to first build a rapport, then break it. That's where flirt…
/r/seduction16/04/14 04:57 PM
6

It's actually a process. Watch/Read -> Grasp Key Concepts -> Identify What You Should Work On -> Practice -> Self Eval/Feedback -> Rewatch/Reread. Sure, you can pick and choose which part of this process is more important than the other, but you will limit your potential and/or take longer to get there the more you ignore the process as a whole. Trust me I know a lot of people who only practice and don't seem to get any better. So to intrinsically know the concept and practice it often and fully…
/r/seduction16/04/14 04:42 PM
5

Tell stories instead of just talk. Voice is noise and stories captivate. Half of talking is listening. Don't wait till your turn to talk. Don't filter through your "how does this relate to me" question. Listen and hang on to every word, no matter how boring. Be more congruent to people. Pick up cues on what they're interested in and go there early and often. Have an opinion on everything. Don't just spiel out facts about the Beatles, have an opinion on how their music impacted an entire generati…
/r/seduction16/04/14 01:35 AM
1

Trust me, when you start walking and running, there aint no going back, or backward. Once you've destroyed that baseline neediness, all that's left will be this true confidence and you'll approach every girl like she was your best friend. Sounds weird, but it's true. You'll be like hey what's up and she'll be the one who starts qualifying herself to you! I mean, it kinda makes sense, since you were the one who approached her confidently, you can also walk away and approach any other girl confide…
/r/seduction16/04/14 01:26 AM
2

Well, the abundance mentality is both external and internal. External, you have infinite amount of opportunities with infinite amount of women. If you already approach often, then you've gotten that taken care of. However, when you approach them, you'll have to have abundance in yourself also. It means that you are fulfilled in whatever you're doing, and you're just looking for someone to share that with. This way, you're not just looking for their attention or validation, you know what I mean? …
/r/seduction16/04/14 12:26 AM
1

It's a good thing. You're encountering your vulnerability threshold. Now you can deal with any neediness directly. Just realize that before, you might have been needy of one particular woman's attention, and now you might be needy of women's attention in general. It's okay to want to put your dick in every hot girl. Accept that part of yourself. Subcommunicate that purposefully and shamelessly when you talk to them. They'll find it madly attractive (not only your out-of-this-world desire, but al…
/r/seduction15/04/14 11:12 PM
1

Start establishing your demographics, that's the quickest way to meet someone who will have sex with you. What type of girls intimidates you the most? Start approaching them. First to ask them the time and work deeper from there.
/r/seduction15/04/14 10:29 PM
2

Everyone goes through this, I'm sure. I did when I first started approaching. I was working myself up so hard to do it, I'd kick myself if I didn't make an attempt. The important thing to realize is that you're just saying hi. That's all approaching is, no matter how bad ass you think it is. The bad ass part comes after, where you escalate and take her on an insta-date or whatever. You have to convince yourself that's all it is. If you want to say hi, say hi. If not, let her go. Don't work yours…
/r/seduction15/04/14 08:26 PM
3

I really can't see who's responding to who since all the redacts are in the same color.
/r/seduction15/04/14 08:19 PM
2

Yeah, but you shouldn't be telling yourself that you're confident while you're out. The keys to true confidence are a profound sense of self-awareness, responsibility to your actions and their consequences, and the continual embrace of your vulnerability. I mean think about it, what is more attractive to a woman? A man who's standing there puffing himself up with imaginary confidence or a guy who always takes risks and deals with the consequences?
/r/seduction15/04/14 03:44 PM
2

This might be moved to askseddit, but I'll provide a quick answer. Use your therapy as a tool, not as a solution, man. You'll have to be the one who goes down this journey of discovering the basis for your neediness. And I'm very sure that you have a huge amount of neediness because: Most of us have/had it before You're seeing a therapist You don't feel like you can connect with people right now Okay, but I won't even go there beyond that. What I can tell you about connecting with your friend is…
/r/seduction15/04/14 01:50 AM
2

HB7 = 7/10 hot babe. It's better to say she's someone I'm attracted to for X (X being relationship, sex, etc.). 7/10 is purely subjective and ultimately meaningless.
/r/seduction14/04/14 09:16 PM
1

My trick is to focus on a part of a woman's body that always turns me on, and when I actually want to go in, I just go to that part. Whatever boner I get between flirting, making out, etc., I don't really pay attention to any more.
/r/seduction14/04/14 09:06 PM
8

Agreed. There is no right or wrong, only consequences. Think of the game as a process. And when you first start out with a process, like learning any sport, you will try to find a certain technique that you think either works or doesn't work. You will micro manage your actions to produce this outcome. But the problem with any sport, particularly team sport, is that like OP mentioned, there are infinite possibilities based on things that you can't ever control. They say hey, go out and perform th…
/r/seduction14/04/14 04:30 PM
6

To add more to this, as Mark Manson said, you can't separate the inner from outer game. You have to constantly reinforce the belief that you don't have to be any special to get with women, hot or not. And you do this by going out there and approach just about anybody and anything. They are humans too, and some you will connect with, most you won't. As for self improvement, do it because you are given a gift that is called life and if you make the most of it for yourself. You do it so when you ar…
/r/seduction13/04/14 10:43 PM
2

The Art of Comedy by Paul Ryan, as recommended by Mark Manson. Jesus people, just give him the answer to his question.
/r/seduction09/04/14 06:45 PM
3

Nathaniel Branden’s The Six Pillars of Self-Esteem. Summary: No One Is Coming. Raise your awareness, responsibilities, acceptance, assertiveness, purpose, and integrity and you will be all you ever need to kick ass. Models by Mark Manson Summary: already read it? Read it again. It's so jammed pack with information that it's impossible to retain it all the 1st, 2nd, or 25th time around. The Nerd's Guide to Being Confident by Mark Manson Summary: it dives deeper into vulnerability, self acceptance…
/r/seduction09/04/14 05:23 AM
1

Yeah, I'm with you on that. It's a good place to start. It's also good in resetting the brain and allow it rewire after a while. We can all agree that there is a right level of fapping for each person, and each person has to figure that out for themselves (girls included). However, the dark side of nofap, that I haven't seen being discussed in the subreddit or outside of it, is the shame that it conjures. Everybody needs to embrace their kink and be comfortable expressing it. It makes for a heal…
/r/seduction05/04/14 08:20 AM
2

If its only purpose is itself, are you saying nofap is an art then? Ok, just bantering, but let me give you my perspective and explaining the evolutionary part comes in. In the animal kingdom, sexual strategies can be boiled down: Choice Resources Rape Yep, that got dark real quick but it should be self explanatory. Given a population, females will choose to mate with the most adapted individual. That's easy to figure out, given their offspring's survival probabilities. They will also mate with …
/r/seduction05/04/14 12:57 AM
2

Oh I understand, but let's have a civil argument on this. Why don't you state your understand of the purpose of nofap and I'll do the same.
/r/seduction04/04/14 05:51 PM
3

No, don't be. Don't blame women because we've been completely misled our whole lives about what our roles and their roles are. Just because she's not able to describe and breakdown what turns her on doesn't mean she's confused or wrong. It's your job to figure it out and lead her through it. It's your little puzzle. It's your treasure hunt. She's your partner, not your nemesis. Well, some women are your partners and some are nemesis. I don't have to tell you this, but forget the bitchy ones and …
/r/seduction04/04/14 05:35 PM
19

Don't ask women. Tell women. I'm completely serious. You'd be doing her a service. If I had to make a technical analogy: you wouldn't ask a user what kind of application architecture they'd prefer, you'd present 3 functionality scenarios and let them pick one. But it's actually more vague than that. Women, especially highly desirable ones, have a 6th sense about what they want (or do not want) in a guy that's almost impossible to describe. Think about it this way. There are 2 ways of communicati…
/r/seduction04/04/14 04:11 PM
1

Glad I could help. And you're right, he said it in the context of while speaking to women. Though one should address the problem before the interaction to minimize the anxiety. It will raise your average level of awareness and acceptance all the time. Even now, when I'm talking to a cute girl and anxiety starts to flare up, I just go WTF brain? And the awareness kicks in and I start calming down almost immediately.
/r/seduction01/04/14 05:53 PM
1

Pretty good write up, but I gotta point out something.... Do not try to analyze the source or attempt to "cure" yourself of the emotion. You are right in saying that anxiety doesn't need to go away nor does it need to. You act even with it going off. It's like a smoke alarm that you ignore so you can go find some batteries or a fire extinguisher. It's letting you know that you gotta be prepared to jump out the window, but your conscious brain takes the right action that's not so drastic. However…
/r/seduction31/03/14 04:41 AM
1

Yeah, I don't care for neggings and other negative tactics either, but I will admit that they work on some women. Those women are not for me, but they do for some guys here, so I'm actually OK with it. Funny thing is that everybody has boundaries when it comes to being touched. I thought as a guy, I don't really care, since I have let girls touch my ass my whole life. But once a girl grabbed my junk and I reacted very negatively to it. I realized that I have boundaries too, and like many people,…
/r/seduction29/03/14 04:23 PM
1

It sounds like you have a problem with the whole sub in general, so I'm already guilty of all of the things other men out there have done. If that's the premise of the conversation, then I'd just have to accept responsibilities for something I don't do. Which is funny because we're on the same wavelength on a lot of this stuff. I would much rather connect with women on an emotional level than physical level. However, in dance clubs and bars, it's too loud and body language speaks louder. You tou…
/r/seduction28/03/14 06:32 PM
1

Whoa, let's take a step back here. I really appreciated the feedback and discussion until the accusations and threats started flying. But that's cool, I can roll with it. Hopefully you won't take any of this personally. Or maybe you have, who knows. To answer your question, "polarizing" means to be true and controversial in our approach so that women who are generally neutral to us will choose to either love us or hate us for who we really are. Men who are afraid to be true to their own desires …
/r/seduction28/03/14 04:20 PM
1

Sorry, this is where I disagree with you. There is no way for a guy to be able to absolutely tell when she wants you to touch her. Other than asking, that is, but a guy who asks is a guy who doesn't have permission. I do have a few rules: I always try to touch your hand first, through shaking hands or pulling your hand on the dancefloor if you're giving me good vibes. Hands are the easiest to pull back and the easiest to tell her reception to touch. If you come into my frame/space, you will get …
/r/seduction26/03/14 11:45 PM
1

Have fun should be at the top of this list.
/r/seduction26/03/14 08:48 PM
2

I do it sober, or at most 2 drinks in me. Don't get me wrong, I can binge till I'm passed out in a cab. It's just that I need all the awareness I can get. This is one of the foundations of confidence (awareness, vulnerability, and responsibility). Obviously, your awareness and responsibility go to shit when you have a few too many. You might say that awareness and responsibility make me a boring hack. You might say that I would be too self-conscious and judging. But I'm not, and that's the trick…
/r/seduction26/03/14 08:45 PM
3

You're getting downvoted, but I think your feedback is very important. Women are very perceptive to touch, so a guy has to pick up on social and personal cues before proceeding. And proceed with confidence and because you want to touch her, not because some Internet forum told you to.
/r/seduction26/03/14 03:50 PM
-1

I've gotten that before. Seems extreme but it does happen out there. This is not to scare people, but be ready for any explosive over reaction. You can't control it, but you can prep yourself to deal with it. Luckily I knew all the bouncers.
/r/seduction26/03/14 03:46 PM
3

Yep, blunt and honest. You're communicating that you have no time to waste and you won't play games if she doesn't play games. You also have other girls to hit on, so put up or shut up. The only caveat I would say is that you should state it like it's happening: "You should go on a date with me" or "you should come back to my place". Don't put it like an ultimatum: "do you want to date me, yes or no?" Regarding investing a little, I can talk to all sorts of girls, find out everything about their…
/r/seduction25/03/14 12:43 AM
7

Sure, I can actually give you a concrete example of a buddy I have. He insists that before he likes a girl, he would try to get to know her first. Seems harmless, but it's not. So he checks their fb, maybe add them, then try to invite them to rock climbing, yoga, soccer, or something. Those things are big in Seattle. He's actually falling deeper and deeper in love with these girls as he hangs out with them. He's very friendly and easy to get along with, so the girls love it. Until he tries to ch…
/r/seduction24/03/14 10:35 PM
1

Teasing and negging could be needy, if the intention is to get attention or a reaction from the girl. But no, I don't mean teasing, I mean a guy trying to find out if she has a soft spot for John Mayer and trying to surprise her with some tickets to his show. It's needy because he's doing it so that he can win her affection. Neediness is in the reason why you do things rather than what you do anyway. That's why no one can concretely give out "what you should/shouldn't do" dating advices. If your…
/r/seduction24/03/14 09:45 PM
3

My recommendations, ordered by changing yourself from the inside out: Mastery, by Robert Greene - all the why's in the world will come back to this. Figure this out, and everything else will be much much easier to digest. What does it have to do with seduction? From a core, a sense of purpose, and an ability to master the environment and a skill, you can infinitely apply it to anything. Also, you are truly inviting her on a journey that is your life's task. Way more attractive than simply doing …
/r/seduction24/03/14 05:46 AM
31

In adding further, let me go over some related topics: The intention behind trying to understand women, The difficulty behind the mechanics, should you ever try, A better way to interact with women, and Why you must express your desire shamelessly Intentions Intentions set the precedence for everything. Most guys try to understand women to find an essence or weakness that they can attack. This in itself communicates neediness. Why? Because you're trying to find her values, which in-turn place th…
/r/seduction24/03/14 04:59 AM
2

Report back after. I will have upvotes waiting for you.
/r/seduction24/03/14 04:06 AM
2

That's your cue to develop something within yourself that you cherish more than anything else. One could call this a sense of purpose, but it can be as simple as a hobby. This internal thing will allow you to be self-validated, self-accepted, and self-respected. Then nobody, or nothing external, can break you down. That's not to say you shut yourself off from everything, but rather you seek to find your place in the world. You will constantly test yourself and your creation. To do this, you have…
/r/seduction20/03/14 06:50 PM
3

It's ok. So long as we're dorking out, let's talk a bit about neediness, desire, confidence, and presence. By the way, the reason why I asked the original question is that true confidence cannot be faked. Same goes for neediness, you can't fake a lack of neediness. You can temporary modify a behavior, but in the end, the truth is always trying to shine through. I think when you refer to neediness, you are referring to desire. You can have strong desires without the neediness behind it. One way t…
/r/seduction20/03/14 05:55 PM
4

Do you feel your neediness being replaced by confidence?
/r/seduction20/03/14 06:23 AM
15

That article is pretty confusing. Why does the title have nice in so many quotation marks? Let me give you my run down: a) Guys who put the women's values above his own are not attractive. This can be viewed as niceness, but it can also be some guy who's being a jerk to get her attention also. b) Express your desire openly. You have a right to, and she'll find it attractive. c) She has a right to shut you down because she's not compatible with you. There is nothing else to do beyond this point. …
/r/seduction20/03/14 06:09 AM
2

The best openers are "hi" or "hey". Your brain will adapt to the situation to think what to say next. It'll seem natural. If you focus too much on openers, then a) you'll tend to over-analyze and get stuck or b) seem contrived when you approach, like it's part of a routine. But as you say, something is way better than nothing, and experience is the best teacher.
/r/seduction07/03/14 01:29 AM
2

Yes, this is a great way to get started. The point isn't to "get her", but to get to know her and feel her. Once you've done this enough, then the next step up would be to announce your interest in her. But you do it with less anxiety. Just so you know, if this is the only way you can approach, then it's considered a weak move. She can always tell that your intentions isn't just to make chit chat. Say "I wanted to meet you cuz I think you're cute" is the best way. Then you can talk about what ki…
/r/seduction06/03/14 07:35 PM
2

No problem, I'm just regurgitating what others have figured out. They are the true heroes here. And you are too. You're the one who will have to carry yourself through this journey, but trust me, it is so worth it. I would not trade the sense of confidence that I have for a million dollar. It is the rarest and coolest thing a guy can have. Sometimes I just want to show it off by coming up to a hot girl and telling her I wanna go out with her and have sex after. Of course, I get shot down most of…
/r/seduction06/03/14 05:17 AM
4

Well it's impossible to tell whether she really wanna be with you or not, since almost of these cues are non-verbal and really subtle, but I have an ingenious way finding out whether a girl likes me or not. I'm only gonna share with you guys but please don't tell anyone this secret cuz if the girls catch wind of it, they'll tell each other and I can't use it any more. Ready? You ask them to a date/make-out/sex! It's really ingenious in that... uh... well, they just have to say yes or no. BTW, sh…
/r/seduction06/03/14 04:20 AM
21

All those things you listed out are external, and that's the issue. Confidence comes from within, and that's the hardest part to describe but let me try for you. First of all, your ex only triggered the avalanche, but the disaster was waiting to happen anyway, so I wouldn't blame it on her too much. Obviously, she could have been a better person, but half of the people in the world are terrible and chances are it was going to happen anyway. This is a fact, and if you are uncomfortable with this …
/r/seduction05/03/14 11:12 PM
1

She will test your honesty, character, strength, commitment, social skills, etc. and you will do the same to her. If she doesn't, then she is needy. Same goes for you. It's a matter of perspective. If you see it as an obstacle, then it is. If you see it as an opportunity to be honest and forward, then it is. I could very well call it the golden test, to see if you're worthy of the gold.
/r/seduction04/03/14 09:58 PM
1

I don't really believe anyone is boring. You just might not be compatible with her, and it's something you'll have to accept and move on like the rest of us. But before you do that, you should try to open yourself up to her more. She probably doesn't know what you're like, so she represents a plain image that she thinks every guy wants. Remember, in flirting, it's you who break rapport and it's you who leads. You don't wait for a cue that's what makes you cool. If that doesn't work... then you k…
/r/seduction25/02/14 04:47 PM
1

Yeah, that works, but it changes the context of things, doesn't it? Guess what I'm trying to say is that, short of lying, give them an assuring reason why you're not out with somebody, or meeting them through somebody. Society has built enough misconceptions against lonely guys that you don't need to touch on it. Let's face it, guys who can approach are so fucking rare that we're seen as creepers half the time. Even though after being approached, the girls often say that they're glad we approach…
/r/seduction25/02/14 01:50 AM
3

I live in Seattle. It's not small by any stretch of the imagination. That's your cue to get to know the bouncers, DJs, promoters, owners. Then it's perfectly reasonable to assume that they invited you out, got you in for free (usually before the lines get long), and are now busy doing some shit so you're on your own. Remember, just the fact that you know somebody and isn't just cruising for girls makes you OK in their books.
/r/seduction25/02/14 12:26 AM
1

I get it a lot too, even if I'm out with friends and I've abandoned them (cuz they don't know how to do what I do). I've found that I get positive vibes when I respond "hey do you know [this person] or [that person]". It at least reassures them that you're not some predator. They've gotten in their heads that lonely guys tend to be predators like those serial killers, while the truth is that some of us are perfectly happy alone and social at the same time. I wouldn't try to lie to them like sayi…
/r/seduction24/02/14 11:47 PM
4

Usually I'm successful at wingmaning when I split off and do my own thing. Then when the girl inevitably asks me who I'm there with, I'd "complain" about this guy who gets the girl all the time. Later on in the night, she meets this guy and he doesn't have to do shit.
/r/seduction24/02/14 09:43 PM
2

To tell you the truth, it's hard sometimes and it's easy sometimes. There isn't a single transition period between the two. But it has generally been easier after I relax and stopped listening to the voice in my head telling me to be anxious or that I have to do something spectacular. There are expectations all around you, and the more of them you can drop, the more likely you'll get somewhere cool. Get in there, slip yourself up against her body somehow, and magically all sorts of doors open up…
/r/seduction22/02/14 10:01 PM
2

What's wrong with talking about yourself? Share your life and your emotions. Women love that. It's only boring if you think it is. Just be careful not to spew emotional vomit. Remember, just say whatever's on your mind. It's not important what you say. It's important why you say it. Say stupid stuff and laugh it off. Say clever stuff and don't care if they laugh or not.
/r/seduction21/02/14 01:15 AM
1

Following your tangent: there is a difference between style and fashion. Hopefully that statement doesn't require an explanation.
/r/seduction20/02/14 10:56 PM
1

I see what you're saying, and I agree 200%. Though, something else to consider: if a column is strong, you don't have to hold it up. What I'm saying is this: you would only need to hold your frame if there is a chance it could tumble in the first place. Work hard and hustle everyday in your life, so that when a girl says this to you, you'd just respond with "jesus who have you been hanging out with?" or something along that line. It would seem unfathomable to you that anyone would be less than f…
/r/seduction18/02/14 01:16 AM
6

Yea, obviously the article is tailored toward the casual readers who are gonna pass it around the web to their friends on valentine's day. Deep down, the desire to not be single in itself creates neediness. If you have great relationships with women, but haven't found that one where attraction, chemistry, and compatibility are all aligned yet, then there is nothing to fret. The rest comes down to a numbers game and as long as you continue to put your ass on the line and keep taking chances, the …
/r/seduction14/02/14 02:17 AM
9

I approach plenty but don't follow up nearly often enough. It's Tell The Truth Thursday.
/r/seduction14/02/14 02:11 AM
1

Attraction, chemistry, and compatibility are the 3 things that you should use to determine whether you should be in an LTR. They are related but are very separate. Without A, B doesn't matter, and without B, C doesn't matter. Age doesn't matter and all those factors change over time so always re-evaluate.
/r/seduction11/02/14 08:40 PM
0

Fuck off with this. Sex and relationship are not transactions. You should never be selling anything, just determining attraction, chemistry, and compatibility. If you can't find it in yourself to approach honestly and accept rejections fully, then don't approach at all. You're leaving a bad taste in their mouths and ruining it for the rest of us.
/r/seduction05/02/14 07:50 PM
1

I know what you're saying, but they're not techniques, per se. You do whatever is natural at the moment, but always shooting for the goal of being yourself as much as possible. That's how you build the confidence that is unshakable and you are free to do anything you want. All techniques have limitations. You don't.
/r/seduction01/02/14 03:45 AM
2

First of all, badminton is an opportunity to be social. Don't blame it or use it as an excuse. But I kinda get where you're coming from now. Second of all, realize that AA is a very real thing that everybody deals with, but the reason for it is completely illogical. That is to say, the fear within you can never materialize, so the fear is irrational. More on this later. But it's there and it doesn't go away by itself so let's talk and do something about it. To overcome it, you have to take actio…
/r/seduction25/01/14 05:09 AM
1

The short answer is that anybody who believes they deserve to be loved gets loved and anybody who doesn't will not be loved. When you were a kid, you always knew you should be loved. But growing up, your parents conditioned you to believe that you have to do something to be loved. Probably because they didn't want you to have bad behaviors. The media fucks you over with all those hero must save the day to get se vagina stories too. So to undo all that takes a while, but if you just say hi to str…
/r/seduction16/01/14 10:32 PM
2

We're all imperfect on the inside, and the more we share this imperfection, the better the connections will be. Cool is subjective to everyone, she might think you're cool even though you don't. What makes a person cool typically is his ability to embrace his difference. I say both improve your life and attitude as well as share it with everyone. If they think it's uncool, screw them.
/r/seduction15/01/14 09:23 PM
1

Soloing is the way to go. Often it's my friends who are holding me back. Soloing also clears up so much logistical problems to solve. Once you show people that you can approach, they all want to be your friend.
/r/seduction15/01/14 09:17 PM
2

Approach anxiety is a completely irrational fear, just like how girls are afraid of spiders, but even less so since some spiders are actually venomous. Girls don't know, or care, if and why you're afraid of saying hi to them. I have come to realize that and now I don't even think about what to say. "Hey you're cute, can I talk to you" just naturally spills out of my mouth. Take it as confidence or whatever you'd like, but at the end of the day, the less you think about it the better.
/r/seduction13/01/14 09:07 PM
2

Bathroom and bar lines are your friends, literally. Remember, work on one thing at a time.
/r/seduction08/01/14 11:02 PM
4

The normal people in my social groups depend on others to introduce them and go online. Needless to say, there is some major resentment of being so dependent, due to: All the usual online issues, I won't list them here Needing a friend/sibling to put in a good word for you Shark feeding, where multiple people are going for the same cute single girl Low frequency of meeting new people Quality of people (both looks and personality) Feeling the need to please the entire group and the women (double …
/r/seduction06/01/14 11:12 PM
2

The funny thing is that the 3rd objective watcher would probably think that you shouldn't approach, unless they're someone from this sub. Approaching is bad ass because normal people don't do it. It shows a vulnerability that few can accept. There is some transgression of social norms, and that's why it's attractive.
/r/seduction06/01/14 09:26 PM
11

Underneath, all girls know that all guys perform. Just like all guys know that girls put on make up and wear some sort of scent. But you don't talk about make up with girls and they wouldn't wanna talk about your game with you. A) it doesn't really elevate your game or validate it (no validation, remember?) B) it's unattractive and not interesting to them. It's not interesting to them because it brings LOGIC to an inherently EMOTIONAL process. Men need "game" to rationalize their insecurities. B…
/r/seduction06/01/14 06:15 PM
0

I'd assume that until I get rejected.
/r/seduction03/01/14 10:03 PM
1

Simply become fulfilled enough in your life that there is little to no neediness. This is different for everybody. I can recommend you some books if you don't know where to get started.
/r/seduction02/01/14 09:31 PM
1

Yea, I've seen guys who would approach anybody and anything. The problem is that after so many, you do it like a robot and that's frightening because it seems so disingenuous. I've had better success imagining each approach as if I'm trying to get to know them as friends. That way, I have a genuine curiosity for who they are. It makes them, as well as each of my interaction, feel special. Another advice is not to fake it till you make it. Because after you fake it for so long, you don't know wha…
/r/seduction02/01/14 05:43 PM
1

They are trying to sell a product, so you think they'd show you the rejections? To an uninitiated guy, rejections are the exactly painful thing they're trying to avoid. If you're nice and friendly, very few people will reject your approach. But approaching isn't the objective of the conversation. You have to polarize women, and you do that by showing interest. You can do this slowly, but why? When you're actually high value, you have no time to waste with each woman. So you gotta show interest q…
/r/seduction02/01/14 01:57 AM
1

If you accept it, she will too. That's golden rule about anything you feel shameful about but shouldn't really be.
/r/seduction30/12/13 06:31 AM
1

Hey I've had some time to think about it and I believe you deserve a more thorough answer. But before I get into it, there is an important point you have to realize--that the objective of all this shenanigans is a more pimping you, and not the results you can brag to your friends about. This is the key to understanding a process-oriented approach vs. an outcome-oriented approach. Okay, here it goes. First, have you been getting your blow-outs? I don't mean girls not being interested in you, but …
/r/seduction26/12/13 05:00 AM
1

Just reading between the lines in your post, it seems that you're really trying to force the results to come to you. I went through that phase too and quickly discovered that just because you do X doesn't mean Y will happen. You can sort of create an atmosphere and aura, but the rest is left to chance, more or less. The funny thing is that the more relaxed you are, the better the results are. (This is true for most things in life also). So yes, take a step back and just let it come to you. I rem…
/r/seduction24/12/13 11:49 PM
2

Oneitis is a symptom of the disease you have, not the root cause of it. You need to start doing things that you've long neglected. Find a sense of purpose. Find a joy in your life that is outside of women. Find a style that is distinctly yours. Find yourself. No one here can help you with any of the above. Do that first, then come back. People can help you with the rest once you've gotten those figured out.
/r/seduction24/12/13 05:26 PM
16

Change the title and sidebar please. Title should be "12 myths perpetuated here that need to be straightened out".
/r/seduction24/12/13 03:41 AM
3

It's hugely important. I don't believe that attraction is enough to get a guy to ask a girl out. She has to activate a part of him that just can't live without her. I don't approach every hot girl I see. That'd be frightening. I approach the girls that I can see myself seeing again. That's where radiance comes in.
/r/seduction24/12/13 03:26 AM
4

Mark Manson said in his IAMA that when he got away from the scene, his results actually got better. He recommends everyone to take a few months off to just work on yourself. Let the things that you practice become a part of you instead of your objective. And aren't you supposed to be outcome-independent? Maybe that's what's messing with your head anyway.
/r/seduction23/12/13 10:39 PM
7

Half of getting laid is seduction and half is logistics. Just because you don't have a place doesn't mean you have no supply line. Write down 20 places where it's ok to have sex and use them from time to time. The park The car Bathroom at school Friend's place Her place (where she feels safe) Movie theater Hotel/motel Snow resorts Under the highway overpass The private study rooms at school Frat/sorority houses House parties Gun ranges ...
/r/seduction23/12/13 10:35 PM
20

Their game is make-up, gym, eating well, and posting pictures. They're doing it quite well if you ask me. There is one thing about their seduction that not many do well, that is radiance. It can only come from an internal source of excitement for life. But I would also venture to guess that the percentage of women with radiance is the same as men with confidence/presence.
/r/seduction23/12/13 10:28 PM
3

Prioritize things in your life. You'll see what's truly important to you and what things you can just let slip. You'll also realize you can let go of the unhealthy emotions also. Your boundaries will start to form around what you won't compromise on. When somebody starts to step into this boundary, you'll feel uneasy and it's time to act. Saying simple things like "hey I'm not happy that you did x, we're still cool but could you stop" works wonders. If they continue to push your boundaries then …
/r/seduction23/12/13 03:12 AM
1

Yep but don't you think you'd have more and better friends if you're a guy with boundaries instead of somebody who gets pushed around?
/r/seduction23/12/13 02:45 AM
1

Then say ok and move on. Seems like you have issue with somebody and you didn't include this info in your original post. I can't read your mind but if you think those two books are contradicting, you're reading them wrong. Go back and read the part about boundaries.
/r/seduction23/12/13 02:41 AM
1

I really don't see the contradiction at all. The opposite of a nice guy is not an macho jerk. They both have validation issues. The opposite is an integrated guy, who seeks genuine human interactions. The feedback you receive is data you process and not a reflection of who you are. This is why you listen without filters, because there is so much info you can use to better yourself or put yourself in more favorable conditions.
/r/seduction23/12/13 02:31 AM
2

I go to a lot of EDM shows too. Number one thing is to have energy and be enjoying the music. Girls know when you're trying leech energy off of them. Then I approach like any other situation really. Nice, friendly, easy, and spin them around and you're in. Don't forget to judge their emotional state and be congruent. Just because they're there doesn't mean they're happy.
/r/seduction23/12/13 02:25 AM
2

You're a good man, Josh Sway.
/r/seduction21/12/13 05:28 PM
1

Looks matter not in the way that you think it does. The funny thing about attraction is that women are attractive just being themselves, whereas men create attraction. Judging by your post, you seem like a guy who cares about his looks in the wrong way. You should care about how you carry yourself. That includes living a healthy lifestyle and making wise choices with your body. You shouldn't care whether someone finds your particular type of look attractive or not. There are worse physical thing…
/r/seduction20/12/13 07:01 PM
5

Great article, Josh. I'd also like to add that love is what you give, not what you expect to get. You have to give it unconditionally. The one thing that resonates with me when I talk to women about men is that they can detect if a guy is giving his love with some expectations of getting something in return. That makes it seem like the love is tainted in some way. If the love is not returned then the love that is given is taken away. That restricts the woman from feeling and dancing in all her g…
/r/seduction15/12/13 08:09 PM
2

Similar content but I suggest you read it. It goes too a lot more depth. The one thing that he highlighted in the video repeatedly that he didn't go too much into it in the book is the mentality that you don't need to perform. Who you are is good enough, and seduction is the emotional process of finding compatibility. It's also an irrational process so the less you worry about saying the right thing and focus on expressing your desires, then the better off you will be.
/r/seduction28/11/13 10:42 PM
1

In his AMA, he said exactly just that. There is no skill in talking to women and be intimate with them. We're all born to do it. There is skill, however, in sorting out the emotional garbage that inundate the typical guy. It makes sense since if you didn't find the hot girl very hot, you wouldn't need any skill to pick her up right? I try to learn and practice all of the mindsets and develop my own style. There is a right occasion for everything. But when shit gets a bit too heavy, Mark's wisdom…
/r/seduction28/11/13 05:03 AM
9

Remember to smile with your eyes.
/r/seduction27/11/13 06:53 PM
5

I was referring to this, guys.
/r/seduction27/11/13 08:46 AM
2

PENIS!
/r/seduction27/11/13 04:26 AM
7

How this video speaks to me is all about developing rapport and breaking rapport. You develop rapport (trust, more or less) with a woman when you approach her, and you break rapport to flirt and seduce her. When you step into a stranger's force field, they're naturally gonna be suspicious of you. So you have to divert their attention for you to get in deeper without sounding the alarms. The way develop rapport is to find something common to talk about or to do with. Of course everyone is interes…
/r/seduction09/11/13 01:39 AM
2

Hi Jason and Brent, what are 3 common or big misbeliefs that may impede a guy from reaching his full potentials? Conversely, what are 3 beliefs that may propel him past obstacles? Thanks.
/r/seduction07/11/13 08:49 PM
2

It depends on how you define insecurity, doesn't it? If you see insecurity as that feeling like you're never good enough, as something that you had to compensate for, then it goes away as soon as you realize you are more than good enough. As Mark Manson said, you don't have to perform to any level; you are good enough as who you are. Who are you? You're a badass junior in high school, pimping balls out, and quite a good writer, if I may add. If you define insecurity as a crippling anxiety that k…
/r/seduction07/11/13 07:21 AM
1

It's a response to this article (written by a guy): http://elitedaily.com/dating/gentlemen/good-girls-unicorns/ As a writer, I lost a few brain cell reading either article. I wouldn't recommend you do either. The premise of the first article is that "good girls" don't go to EDM shows half naked and don't post pictures of themselves on instagram. These good girls have become so rare that they're considered unicorns by the author. The second article contests this and states that... well, I don't k…
/r/seduction06/11/13 09:26 PM
1

Scarcity is typically something your mind creates once it zeroes in on a target. Call it target fixation. We all do it, at least at the subconscious level. It breaks up our flow. The solution is go from target to target, or to act like there is no target at all (though that's tougher). But let's say you're at a party and it's a total sausage fest with one hot girl. Every guy is gonna make a pass at her, fighting for her attention. You see how this makes them needy? It may seem that you're boxed …
/r/seduction05/11/13 07:26 PM
7

I really don't think it's a shit test at all. She sees you as different than the average guy and that's good for you. The fact that you're trying to get with her probably makes a bit needy. How can I tell? Because your entire post is about how she makes you feel. Red flags. First thing first: she is uncomfortable with her sexual identity. She created this identity and it's attracting the wrong type of guys to her. If she shows that she's high value and that she has boundaries, these guys would f…
/r/seduction04/11/13 11:16 PM
1

You are an inspiration! You also gave a good idea of what to do when they say "you're so high". When I'm in state and moving around a lot, I get this a lot. I used to say "no, completely sober", but now I just won't say anything, like you did.
/r/seduction04/11/13 07:38 PM
1

Hi, please read this thread here first: http://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ph7xr/women_giving_advice_giving_women_advice_and_you/ You seem to be really genuine, and I'd love to help you out. However, I want to make sure you know what you're asking for, and what you're getting out of it. Last thing any of us would want to do is giving out advice that could potentially be hurtful. Thanks.
/r/seduction01/11/13 10:06 PM
6

At the 1h22m45s mark of this clip, Mark Manson explains his thought on shit tests. Very informative. I'd much agree with him on that part. Except a shit test might not come from the target directly, but from one of her friends. Let's say that you're being absolutely honest and congruent, and the target accepts it. However, her friend is just an absolute bitch and wants you to fuck off. Then the info posted by thedukeofawesome is very useful. But otherwise, continue to be honest and congruent.
/r/seduction01/11/13 09:55 PM
5

I'm sort of in the same predicament and here's how I look at it--alcohol stimulates a positive emotion within you that you tend to equate to confidence. It also dulls the anxiety, but forget about that for now. If you can find a way to trigger the positive emotion without the alcohol, then you're golden. So what I've been doing is drinking rum and coke (or anything and coke). Then sometimes I would just drink coke. Coke is bad for you but a little bit won't hurt. Then almost by magic, the good v…
/r/seduction01/11/13 09:44 PM
2

Sorry, you lost me somewhere in the middle. I like rants and brain dumps but try to have some sort of structure in your writing, it really brings the point across. The thing about places to dance (including clubs, raves, and even lounges) is that people either like them or they don't. If you like them, then bar none, they are the best place to meet and pick up chicks. If you don't, don't pressure yourself to go there, you'd look awkward trying to psyche yourself into the "dance stupid" mentality…
/r/seduction01/11/13 08:53 PM
1

Some tips: Go out on a weekday, parents are more trusting then. Avoid places where you'll have to sit across from her, it'll seem like a "performance". In fact, avoid any sit down places in general. Location, location, location. Don't stray too far from places where you can have some private time together. Don't ask her where she'd like to go. You lead. Don't let your friends or her friends crash the date. With that said, here are my suggestions: Ice cream, coffee, desert... anything that's ligh…
/r/seduction30/10/13 07:07 PM
1

Hey, great post! I put off reading it but I was glad I finally read it. A few points I'd like to add: Emotional state - your post perfectly describes how important state is to game. If you're in the right state, you don't even have to game, it feels like. People who game without state are so mechanical that I wonder when they'll crash and burn. Introverted - the MBTI model is heavily criticized as a psychological tool, and with good reasons. I see it more as a social style than something that wa…
/r/seduction17/10/13 10:29 PM
1

Related to this, I've been thinking of the ABCs of pickup. I hope someone can help me with it. A - Abundance B - Be outcome-independent and self-amused (need help with this one) C - Congruence
/r/seduction15/10/13 07:37 AM
24

It really depends on the person, but I would say you don't have to quit social media completely. It has its purposes in your scheme of things. For example, it's great for planning events and getting the right people to come. You can also tell a lot by a person's social circles. However, don't check it every hour of the day. Don't pay attention to random posts. Don't comment unless you have something cool to say. Ultimately, outside of the social tools that fb provides, it creates an environment …
/r/seduction15/10/13 07:33 AM
1

It's like AA for people who drink twice a year. It's incredible that they advocate such an extreme behavior. I know they say that each person has a different goal, but the posts and upvotes seem to reward the longest you can go without fapping. I'm all for "responsible" fapping: low levels of stimulation, prolonged sessions, predictable frequency. Porn actually helps if you just let it fill in the gaps instead of providing all the stimulation.
/r/TheRedPill10/10/13 10:01 PM
1

First of all, this is a problem that can be fixed. Second, stop taking advice from ALL women, including your friend at the coffee shop. Appreciate that she's being honest with you, and take her feedback into consideration, but she'll never truly be able to help you long term. Determine if you need a psychologist or not. It's a deep question that only you can answer. There is not enough context you can give to anybody on the internet or even in real life to determine that for you. If you do and y…
/r/seduction09/10/13 06:03 PM
1

No More Mr. Nice Guy has exercises in it, and I feel if you don't do it, reading the book is pointless since you'll forget the concepts as soon as you put the book down. Models is the same way, but since it's not as deep psychologically, you can be in a "situation" and remember concepts from the book and change your behaviors consciously. Of course, changing your behaviors subconsciously takes deep reflections, some external help, and massive massive actions.
/r/seduction09/10/13 05:53 PM
1

Hi Josh, when I first started out, I used to have approach anxiety like everyone else, and the 3-second rule worked out great for getting over the hump. However, now that I know I CAN and that I MUST approach her, I take my time with it. Maybe I'll talk to a few strangers around her first. This shows that I'm in abundance status and I'm just friendly. Maybe I'll do something that makes me laugh to show I'm self amused. In the meanwhile, I'm getting more and more info on her so I can be congruent…
/r/seduction09/10/13 04:44 PM
9

As Mark Manson said, it's not so much what you say, it's your intentions behind saying it. If you're not saying it for some reaction, and your intention is truly to let her know she's doing something right, then you can put it in any way you want. Maybe she'll take it the wrong way. Maybe she'll find it somewhat creepy. But once you show that you don't care what her reaction would be, then she'll appreciate the fact that you had the power of observation as well as the balls to show it.
/r/seduction08/10/13 07:22 PM
2

Think of it as extreme neediness, which is caused by oneitis. If you are in a co-dependent relationship, this may attract her even more. But this typically doesn't last long, and your neediness will eventually outgrow hers and out you go. If you can keep it at the same level or slightly less than hers, then you can keep the seduction going. However, it's best if you keep the oneitis to a minimum (if you find a truly amazing girl, doing this will be very tough), you will get into an independent r…
/r/seduction07/10/13 03:28 AM
7

Yep. Fuck yes or hell no is what I tell myself. Now, they'll be women who are either in the grey area or you can't tell. This is a signal to continue to polarize them until you get your answer. And you can't polarize them by sweet talking them. You polarize them by being more direct about what you want, and sticking to the boundaries that you've set. The more you compromise on these, the more ground you give until you are permanently friendzoned. A woman's seduction is seeking a man they want to…
/r/seduction03/10/13 09:40 PM
1

Beautiful post, Twillz01. I can only add to it my favorite quote about inner game, by the master of seduction himself--Casanova: "I do not know whether it was by my intellect that I have come so far in life, I do know that it is to it alone that I owe all the happiness I enjoy when I am face to face with myself."
/r/seduction29/08/13 10:03 AM
1

That's a tricky one. You have to balance between the age (young and confident) with the strict social setting (MBA school). I still think you should push the boundaries a bit, but all in the name of fun. Use basic techniques sparingly, such as: negging (pick on somebody in the audience in a light hearted manner), kino (give people high fives if they laugh at your joke), and, of course, always be outcome-independent. I think Seth MacFarland is the best role model for this situation since he seems…
/r/seduction13/08/13 04:37 PM
1

More info on the audience like age, demographics, etc...? I'd say, without knowing too much, that you should treat the entire audience like a girl you're out on a date with. Strong eye contact, don't seek validation from them, you lead, you flirt, you set the tone.
/r/seduction12/08/13 08:07 PM
1

One of the best examples of amplify out there: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uW6HbZXI9Y0&t=01m22s
/r/seduction06/08/13 06:42 PM
4

It's also a joke. And it's amusing. I remember Tyler talking about how the game is just hilarious to him in one video. He's supposed to come up to a girl and convince her to let him stick his penis in her... then pump her full of juice. Louis and he are referring to the same silliness notion of dating, though Louis puts it in a darker perspective. But then again, just for laughs.
/r/seduction06/08/13 06:36 PM
12

I've been asked if I was a player recently, so the thoughts are fresh on my mind. First of all, is it a serious question? If it's asked in a joking manner or over text, I just ignore it. If I answer it, it'll seem like I'm qualifying myself. If she's dead serious about it, then I answer it as truthfully as possible. Are they supposed to be exclusive relationships? No. Do you consider yourself a player? No, I just consider myself being single. Are you breaking their hearts? No, I'm sure they're a…
/r/seduction05/08/13 07:54 PM
7

The old adage that the first person you seduce is yourself is true here. What you need is a deeper seduction, and you get that by using your imagination. Imagine all the activities you could do together, particularly sexual activities. Allay your fear of commitment by thinking only of the actions and not the resulting consequences. Because you don't know the consequences; and though your mind tries to prepare you for them, you need to know that you will deal with them the most effectively when t…
/r/seduction05/08/13 07:47 PM
1

I get your point and it's not meant to be taken literally, but my theory is that our neediness comes from our parents when we're young. We needed it to be taken care of and to be raised properly. We needed their validation and acceptance. It's just that in the real world, these validations don't exist but we seek it anyway. We just project them onto people are attracted to. Children should be taught to be independent and self validated. This is why sports is such a powerful tool for... well... g…
/r/seduction01/08/13 05:00 PM
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