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trampledrosetrampled Archive

View 4 posts and 38 comments by trampledrosetrampled on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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1

Good luck with your mental health brother. I'm lucky I had a support system that saw through her bullshit immediately. I can definitely attest to what you said, this crazy person would kill everyone in my family, children included, if she thought she could get away with it.
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/22 02:45 AM
2

I too would appreciate all of this advice. It's been 4 years and it's been crazy. I've tried boundary after boundary and it's just the same pile of shit year after year. I'm not saying there isn't hope but it feels a little bit hopeless that there isn't some type of reprieve. Can someone with more experience than I explain to me how those people can literally say whatever disgusting shit they want and there is zero backlash? You can just falsely accused someone of something and then.... nothing?
/r/Divorce_Men31/08/22 10:42 PM
4

That reasoning for you not forgiving her is hilarious to me. Why can't you forgive my abuse? Why do you think idiot?!
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/22 04:55 PM
2

I don't think having integrity makes you weirdo. The times my ex was blasting family friends behind my back would have been a welcome time for anyone to step up and tell me. I get people's hesitance but for fucks sakes, have some compassion.
/r/Divorce_Men22/06/22 02:59 PM
10

I guess, sometimes, the trash takes itself out.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 10:49 PM
4

Awesome thanks, I do appreciate your advice. That last paragraph is something. After I recovered from the world's biggest eyeroll, I just felt a sadness that these fucking people just can't be decent. It's not hard. The fucking concept isn't even that hard.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 09:57 PM
3

I do count my lucky stars that she was stupid enough to sign that alimony away. Some days though, my bucket full of reframe material is empty and it's hard to get over some things.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 09:46 PM
3

How long did it take her to try and come crawling back?
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 09:44 PM
4

I had a chat with someone today who mentioned that exact thing. I have 2 teenaged girls and soon to be teenaged boy. Any advice on how to start that narrative? They ask for allowance type money fairly regularily.
/r/Divorce_Men16/06/22 09:42 PM
5

I'm with you, who would care about two immature dirtbags. Nuke the relationship and do better next time.
/r/Divorce_Men08/04/22 08:07 PM
6

I do that already, hence the dental bills l, etc. She, literally, just goes crazy buying shit and sends me the bill after, like, I can't make up how crazy she is. I had bought the glasses and the school supplies already.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/22 07:53 PM
12

That is simple. I guess she sees my generosity towards my children as a situation to take advantage of.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/22 07:06 PM
4

Yes, she's buying unnecessary things, without my consent and then sending me the bill.
/r/Divorce_Men14/02/22 04:28 PM
5

Mine did the same, was too busy blowing that idiot that she signed away her right to alimony. My lawyer said to me, more than once, don't interrupt stupid people when they're giving you what you want.
/r/Divorce_Men13/02/22 04:51 PM
0

I was going to say the same thing, it's frustrating for sure, but I did the same when I was separated and I don't even think I had to provide the separation agreement. I'm still hurt about the hundreds of dollars I have to pay to that cheating cow to have my kids half the time and the fact that if I want to make more money for myself or them, she can take 25% of it. What's the logic in that? I even tried to mediate a set rate for the kids so that if both our circumstances change, it doesn't affe…
/r/Divorce_Men10/02/22 03:44 PM
1

I'm a little confused. You're getting divorced and she's going to support these teenaged women... on her own? Not to sound like an asshole but what does that have to do with you? Is she expecting to help pay for that?
/r/Divorce_Men10/12/21 04:15 PM
2

I think those are reasonable expectations. Good luck brother, keep me updated on your stuff. It's a long haul at the best of times.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 11:21 PM
2

Medical and daycare costs are already factored into being shared, but you give g her money every month is not supposed to be designed to put you into poverty. I mean, yes, sometimes it does and that's fucked up but if this clown of a woman doesn't realize taking HALF of your pay is a good deal, she fucked up. She can be upset you forced her to work or not work, who cares. It's math and it's simple. If she wants more money, then she gets a better job. Same goes for nice house, nice car, etc, etc.…
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 10:54 PM
3

For reference, I have the kids 50% of the time and make 85k while she makes 35k. I end up owing half of 1450 per month, which is about 25% of my net. So 55% is waaaaaay too fucking much unless you're making like 50,000.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 10:29 PM
7

55%? How many kids do you have, holy shit, thats lots. There's a ton of factors here, her employment status, your custody schedule, etc. I think most jurisdictions have a payment calculator, what kind of number does that give you?
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 09:47 PM
1

That's a clever idea, it does make a lot of sense. I have been the grey man for 2.5 years and unfortunately the crazy dials up whenever she doesn't get the reaction she's looking for. Any crazy shit that she can do, I've been there. Police called, CFS called, the works. My poker face is only so strong. I'm looking for the nuclear option now.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 06:07 PM
1

I have her blocked on everything except email. I'm not discounting your advice, because it is great and I do appreciate the response. However, I've done all this stuff, I've been doing it for the past 2 years. I have literally read all the stuff and have tried to enforce every single boundary that I can think of and she just won't stop. I have literally moved further away to get away from her shit and it won't stop. I'm desperate for some relief from this. I'm not joking when I say that she come…
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 03:03 PM
2

I've told her this is, in writing, 20 times. What consequences am I applying? A lawyer letter is useless. Is it time to call the police? She has this imagined entitlement to my home. She's brought her fucking parents here, parks in my driveway.
/r/Divorce_Men17/09/21 02:38 PM
3

If you're planning on trying to have a nesting arrangement with someone who created on you, all you're doing is asking for endless abuse resulting from the constant contact. She's already trying to bullshit her way into more time than deserved, could you imagine sharing a personal space with this person? How would you ever sleep there? I guaran-fucking-tee he'd be somehow responsible for paying for 2 of these places on his own, because it's best for the children and she's broke or some other dum…
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/21 11:23 PM
1

They did that here too... After I sat through a day of people wasting my life with their stupid questions.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/21 11:03 PM
9

Parents that should have divorced long ago but stay together "for the kids" is a fucking nightmare. I've been on both sides, my family growing was dysfunctional but intact and I wouldn't wish that hell on my children nor yours. The kids will feel your happiness and sadness whether you're divorced or married or whatever.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/21 09:03 PM
3

I found this: https://courseforparents.com/states/GA The longest they have in there is 16 hours but apparently it differs by county. I think if you find one that satisfies the requirements of the DCF you should be good. Although, your lawyer will be able to give you the yay or nay on that one. In my opinion, if you're acting in good faith in trying to follow the decree, then that's the point isn't it? You can probably think of a thousand times she didn't, just like mine, and it didn't seem to ma…
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/21 04:16 PM
3

I'm not even sure where to find a course that length, yet alone pay for something like that. This is a separation agreement? Are you amicable with the ex?
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/21 03:52 PM
5

Six months? Jesus. In Manitoba divorcing parents are required to do the same, it's called "For the sake of the children" but it's only 8 hours.
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/21 03:43 PM
15

My brother, I'm sorry that you are hurting and you are doing the right thing by reaching out. This process fucking sucks and it hurts your feelings everyday. You will have good days and then a string of bad and then eventually it becomes more good than bad. This isn't bullshit, this is the process sand it takes f-o-r-e-v-e-r. You've got a therapist and you're already trying to better yourself, which is great. So everyday you get a little better and a little happier and model what a good dad is t…
/r/Divorce_Men12/09/21 03:28 AM
1

Keep your head up and enjoy your upcoming summer and if you need an ear, reach out.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/21 04:18 AM
2

I really appreciate this response. I would like to see the video, if possible.
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/21 02:12 AM
6

The other advice here is great, get your head right with meds or therapy or whatever and then make these decisions. You're clearly in crisis after the trauma you've been through. Breathe dude, it's not over, you're going to be ok. Start small, make sure you're eating, hydrated and getting some sort of exercise. Ditch the booze if needed and focus on your survival right now. These clowns want you all fucked up so they can take advantage of the situation. The guy you replied to can fuck right off …
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/21 11:36 PM
1

Yeah dude! Go do something awesome for yourself today. All of the cheeseburgers.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/21 08:54 PM
2

Hey man, I'm close to the years down this road myself. It's going to hurt your feelings for a long fucking time. You're going through trauma and it's going to take a lot of work to get past it. None of this shit is your fault and it's unfair. Giving up your pension and paying child support to a fucking homewrecker is infuriating. But, you will get better and you will be better. You will find your worth and you will learn about boundaries. You will learn that a man with a job, car and a place to …
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/21 08:43 PM
2

My first anniversary after her cheating and discard was 3 days and 2 years ago. The first one I was out of the country and determined to make this day about something else more positive with what I had. So it became my Annual Dessert Day. No holds barred, desserts, in my face all day, every year because fuck her, this is my day! So, naturally, for the next two anniversaries I didn't remember until the day after. It may be a tough day but it's not going to be next year or the year after that; eve…
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/21 08:30 PM
4

I'm very interested in the conversation this will hopefully generate. I'm in the exact same situation, even this morning, where I have raised a boundary and my ex ignored it, only to have my children get mad at me for not breaking it. The situation never changes but now I'm the bad guy for some reason. An example being when she brought her parents to my house to see the kids, on my time, 2 years after the divorce for her cheating, hoping to catch me in an altercation. Fabricated conflict to harm…
/r/Divorce_Men01/09/21 03:23 PM
2

Oh dude, I feel your pain. I know what you're going through. If you think that you'll want a change in what your getting in the future, it's 100x less money to do it now. It sucks but don't give up your rights or your money needlessly.
/r/Divorce_Men21/07/21 12:36 AM
You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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